Two weeks after her miscarriage, for "his birthday" her husband asks to be with another woman? I'd have filed for divorce that day. Seriously. He isn't going to let this go.
Don’t walk run to the lawyer’s office. The husband is a cruel, self centered, and childish man-boy. That look of love and empathy speaks volumes of his lack of character. Things will only get worse - partners support each other. He can’t/won’t cut your losses and leave ASAP. I’m sorry for your loss.
Yes, the "for his birthday" thing, apart from being grossly insensitive, means that he actually isn't someone who will be a good father. He does not have enough empathy for those around him, only his Johnson it seems. I've had two ectopics, and although I was not as deeply sad about it as this caller (only a little sad), I think I would have been grossed out by "but hey, it's birthday time!".
Man, she straight out said “he is perfect in every way” and then talked about how she is afraid that he will leave. 🤦🏽♂️ Then proceeded to talk about him recently asking to sleep with someone else 2 weeks after they lost a baby. This is wild. I hope she leaves.
My ex made me get up and cook for our children on the day of surgery. Surgery I had to have because he brought me HPV. POS is still worthless, decades later.
That's terrible advice. If you slap a man, be prepared to be slapped back or worse. She should just leave and let that be the end of it. Do not put yourself in a position where you're inviting someone to put their hands on you.
That man is cheating on his wife every single chance he gets. He’s very aware when she’s off from a mile away because he thinks she knows something she shouldn’t.
I cried when she said that he said that 2 weeks after she lost her baby. It’s horrific what some people will put up with in relationships. I hope she finds her self worth and leaves that disgusting man.💔
Why? The child was spared from this world. I dont understand why you people want to selfishly bring another child into this world. I wish women couldn't have kids. I hope this happens more often. The child is way better off not having to deal with this world. I say the child was lucky that he/she did not get born.
That is not good advice, because that, in certain cases, has to do with your own insecurities. My ex was convinced I would cheat one day, he never trusted me, he thought I would leave him whenever I announced a surprise or a gift. In the end, he self-sabotaged, he cheated on me and probably not just once, and he dumped me. And then tried to get me back. I néver, éver did anything that was even giving another man attention, let alone cheat on him. I knew he was insecure, he didn't like it if I spoke to men. So only rarely, did I speak to men, I usually stayed near him or sat with women. Work on yourself, if you are scared for no reason that he will leave. Therapy.
I’ve never been so shocked and disgusted by one of these calls, she has no idea just how terrible her husband is too she’s so used to everything being about his wants. I really really hope she leaves this dirtbag.
Clearly he didn’t even want to get married. People who “open their relationship” even before marriage are a serious red flag. If one person isn’t good enough when you’re young, they never will be.
Wow. When John calls someone an a**hole, you know it's legit. I hope this precious lady left the psychopath she called a husband. Praying for you tonight, Sister❤️🙏❤️🙏
She described him as perfect, then followed with he wants to bone another woman right after her miscarriage?? GIRL, my jaw hit the floor. Your husband is trash, pick up the signs. I feel so bad for her
This demon possession, bring other people your bedroom, is not health, he might be a good person but moral wise this definitely not a good humans behavior! Pray 🙏 put God first the center of your life! Then everything shall give to you!!!🙏🙏🙏
Feel worse for the kids she brought into that crappy situation with a mother with no self respect. There's no chance she's able to be a good parent to them. It's tragic and she needs help for their sake.
This is why we as women need to stop trying to be the "cool" wife/girlfriend. She did something she didnt want to do to keep him, and he most likely isnt the person for her anyway. She should have said no and goodbye she could have been 10 years down the road with the man who is actually meant for her.
Your re Absolutely right she was just a pick me girl so she has no power in the marriage. She's probably a SAHM with no financial resources of her own. She's definitely trapped.
The way she makes excuses for him and tries to blame herself… so common. I have done the same thing. And it is hard to recognize how ridiculous you are being defending someone who doesn’t even care about you. I hope she sees the light eventually.
No, work isn’t a distraction from grief it’s a distraction to not deal with a wife in pain because he can’t be bothered to think about anyone but himself. In my completely untrained opinion.
The red flags were there early on in their relationship especially when he wanted threesomes which made her (and would make most women) uncomfortable. Him wanting another woman a couple of weeks after she miscarried is disgraceful. He doesn`t give a damn about her. A miscarriage is very traumatic for a woman to go through.
@@ineedhoez don’t talk about something you can’t even remotely comprehend. Even if it’s 3 weeks, it’s a life growing inside of you and it’s immensely upsetting.
This miscarriage was actually a blessing. This relationship is so toxic and this woman is so blindly making excuses for her husband. It's sad. This is not love.
@@cathalhendron3941as a woman who’s personally had a miscarriage and a rainbow baby (baby after miscarriage) there is Nothing demented about that comment, when I had my miscarriage is should have listened to what God was trying to tell me, instead I got pregnant again by the same man who is a demonic monster. I love my children but I should have took the hint when I had my miscarriage! Having a child with an actual psychopath is Not something to negate!
"He's perfect in every other way...." proceeds to tell us that TWO WEEKS after she loses a baby he asked her for another 3 some. Girl, is this really the kind of guy you want raising your future children? This is how you want them to see a wife treated? Nah, babe. Get out of there. You're not afraid of him dropping a bomb. The bomb has already been dropped and you don't want to turn around to see the devastation.
Character: "the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual." He has mental, he is an idiot, that's a mental. Moral: "holding or manifesting high principles for proper conduct." "When faced with a situation where a baby is lost, it is essential for both parents, including the husband, to maintain composure and handle the situation with care and responsibility. Here are some principles for proper conduct in such a challenging circumstance: 1. Stay Calm: It's crucial to remain calm and composed, as panicking can hinder your ability to think clearly and take necessary actions. Keep a level head to support your partner and engage in effective problem-solving. 2. Support Your Spouse: Losing a baby is an incredibly difficult experience for both parents. Offer emotional support and be there for your spouse, allowing them to express their feelings and providing a safe space for them to grieve. 3. Communicate Effectively: Maintain open and honest communication with your spouse during this challenging time. Share your thoughts, fears, and concerns with each other, and actively listen to one another. Effective communication helps in providing mutual comfort and support. 4. Seek Professional Help: Losing a baby can cause intense grief and emotional distress. It may be helpful to consult with a professional counselor or therapist who specializes in grief and loss. They can provide guidance, support, and coping strategies tailored to your specific needs. 5. Lean on Your Support Network: Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or support groups who can offer empathy and understanding. Sharing your feelings and experiences with others who have gone through a similar situation can provide solace and comfort. 6. Take Care of Yourself: While it's important to support your spouse, remember to prioritize your own well-being as well. Ensure you're getting enough rest, eating well, and engaging in self-care activities that help you cope with the emotional strain. 7. Be Patient: Grief is a complex process, and healing takes time. Be patient with yourself and your spouse as you navigate through this difficult period. Everyone's healing journey is unique, so allow yourself and your partner the space and time needed to heal. 8. Honor the Memory of Your Baby: Find ways to honor and remember your baby. This could involve creating a memorial, planting a tree, or participating in activities that hold significance for you and your spouse. Remembering your baby can provide comfort and a sense of closure. Remember, everyone copes with loss differently, so it's essential to respect each other's unique grieving process. Seek support from professionals and loved ones as you work through your emotions, and remember that healing is possible with time and support." He seems calm, supportive as in getting money to the family (the wrong way thou), his communicating his wants and needs, seems like his not going to a professional, don't know if he's talking with his family, is getting enough rest, doesn't seem patient, and doesn't seem to honor it. Over all, as she describes him he seems like a mix bag. One that she chose and now she's going to have to sit and decide her course of action. With that being said, she is in grief and may be misrepresenting him. It doesn't seem fair to value judgments and identity judgment, asking for what hi "is", rather than what his doing, based on a single point of data.
@@Shaara1agreed. Everyone's talking about how she puts him before herself, but what about those poor kids? There's no way she's doing right by them. A codependent ex friend put my life in danger pleasing her man. I don't even live in the same town as they do.
Our culture doesn't care about people's grief around miscarriage, even other women don't care. I was 7 weeks along and miscarried while I was at work. I told my manager I needed to go home and possibly the hospital, and she was like "we are down 2 people and don't have anyone to cover your shift. Think you can power through it?". So I did. I was young and stupid. I worked 8 hours on my feet that day, bleeding the whole time and sobbing in the back room on my breaks.
Oh my goodness. How absolutely traumatic. If no one else has said it, I really am sorry for your loss and the loss of whatever humanity you thought your coworkers had.
@ericabrown7354 Because having an abortion is a choice and having a miscarriage is something that happens to someone completely against their will. Why even ask such a ridiculous question?
Dr. Delony showed a lot of maturity and professionalism when the threesome bombshell dropped. Dude didn't even flinch. It was also kinda funny how He said all the things her husband should have at the start of the call.
I get the impression that she's so desperately in love with him that she'll do absolutely anything to hold on to him even when it's detrimental to herself. I hope she gets the help she needs.
Her man is a douche bag. For the fact that she allows for him to be with other women he sees her as a doormat. And he will get anything he wants . She has major self esteem issues .
@@mikenelson8377 The fact that your first thought is “sad that nice guys like me don’t get to stick our d**ks in them instead ” means that you’re a garbage human, and not very nice at all. You wouldn’t treat her any better.
I really hope this caller actually goes to see a therapist because her family is wiping the floor with her self esteem and she really doesn’t think she is worth even basic human decency.
I hear my old self in this caller 😢 I used to laugh, too, when sharing horrific things. I can _hear_ the grief and pain behind your laughter. Not being supported by your mom and husband when you are grieving the loss of a child _is horrific._ Celina, you are worth having the time to grieve. You are worth having the family around you grieve with you, or at least sit with you and hold you as you grieve, for however long it takes. A man asking you or telling you that he wants a threesome is a huge red flag. You are enough, my friend. Maybe not for him, but that means he isn't the guy for you. You have a heart of gold and want a committed, loving, monogamous relationship. He doesn't want this. Don't try to change him. Don't feel like you have to prove to him you're enough. You deserve better!! Don't you want to be with someone where you are their one and only?? It exists! I promise you. My ex husband wanted more people in our bedroom, he wanted kink and gross stuff and it kept getting worse. The adult websites he frequented as our intimate life dried up for years, it was heartbreaking. Soul crushing. You. Deserve. Better. You just have to come to _realize_ and _truly believe_ that you deserve better. ❤ I did it. You can, too! Please read "The Life Saving Divorce" and "Healing from Hidden Abuse". I'm sending you the biggest hug and my tears. My heart hurts with you for the loss of your beautiful child ❤ and the "husband" who is selfish beyond measure.
My heart goes out to her. She allowed the disrespect early on in the relationship, and participated in it. I hope she gets the help she needs, and that she gets an opportunity to be honest with her husband, and figure out if this is the lifestyle he wants to continue. She needs to figure out what she wants.
As someone who met her (now ex) husband at a music festival and spent the beginning of our relationship on drugs (that he was supplying) and totally wrecked my brain chemistry… you cannot stay with this man. He is not the same man you “fell in love with” and he is totally inconsiderate and possibly narcissistic. You deserve so so so much better, love.
Dr. JOHN needs to be more direct and tell her to divorce that man! The marriage cannot be saved. She needs to go heal and hopefully, she'd find someone who truly loves her. Leave! Now!
I had a healthy pregnancy in 2020. Tried for #2 exactly 1 year ago and had 2 consecutive miscarriages. It shattered me. Your feelings are so valid and I’m so sorry. Miscarriage completely changed me as a person, no matter how early the loss was. I am now 36 weeks today with my double rainbow baby. Please hang in there and trudge through this pain. It’s so, so unbearable at times. I wish you healing and peace.
Your empathy and sympathy are absolutely mindblowning, while being transparent as well. Thank you Dr. John. I can always gleam something from your shows. This ended up being harder to listen to than I had imagined, for a lot of reasons. My heart breaks for this girl, who loves this good for nothing ass man more than her self. I hope she realizes one day she is enough.
Dr. John's bleeped opinion of the husband was my word to describe him exactly. It's like the wife married someone with a similar emotional range as her mother. He wants permission to cheat (this one openly, at least, as I'm not convinced he's ever been faithful) after she lost her baby. I'm outraged for her. I think that Dr. John's advice is spot on. She needs to have someone outside of her loser household to tell her that she and her feelings are worthwhile. If he doesn't step way up and go way out of his way to be there for her, and commit to the relationship, she should find the strength to get out.
No, there is nothing here to save. This has NEVER been a marriage, it's been a farce from the beginning.She needs to pick up her self-respect from the dungeon she's ALLOWED him to put it in, get her children, file for divorce and get him OUT of her life once and for all. This man is a demon and as such, needs to be sent back to his natural habitat-and we know where demons come from, so we know where that is.🔥👹👺👿😈🔥🔥🔥🌋
My heart hurts for Celina. I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks It took me 3 months to heal from my lost I'm lucky I had my husband and mom supporting me. I hope she knows she's worth more than she thinks. You are a wonderful person and you deserve better Celina 💕
Ugh! My parents disregarded my pregnancy loss so I didn’t even tell them I was pregnant till much later the next time. I’m so sorry you are going through this with your family. This is so tough!
People, let this be a reminder, the relationship with parents will affect the future of the kid's adult relationships. It's clear that the caller had a mother that didn't show love and of course it carried onto the marriage with her husband.
Exactly! I see this in myself now that my romantic history is in the rearview window. Emotionally unavailable parents, emotionally unavailable partners. It's what I picked in relationships, even though it was completely subconscious.
Ohhhh she married her mother! Arg, those generational circles are so hard to break. Been together 10 years with him stepping out. Tried having a baby to keep the marriage together while he is actively trying to rip it apart.
This call is hard to wrap my mind around. The husband is trash. He’s for the streets! Stop defending him. Take off the rose colored glasses and see him for who he is. He’s not a nice man. He’s not a kind man. He’s not even a respectful man. He wants to mess with other women and the wife allows it to be the “cool” wife.
14 days post miscarriage probably still bleeding and husband wants another threesome. I'll start swinging. 😢When I was going thru PPD my husband took me on more Date nights and a vacation to help me feel better
She picked up the phone to be vulnerable in an honest way with you Dr John bc she’s desperate for that connection. She doesn’t have that connection with her husband ~ she never had apparently & the same with her own mom
14:05 is when we really know the character about this guy!! Ugh Celina, I’m so sorry! You are worth so much more than a guy saying that to you 14 days after miscarriage. Please find a good counselor to walk with you! ❤️
I don't think it's about character. Some people don't know how to handle loss, grief and pain. Many men want to help but they feel powerless so they dismiss things. Forgive him! Jesus is near. In Proverbs it's says that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted & binds up their wounds.
@@danilaroche1156 for me it’s character! This guy asked 14 days after and also, an ectopic pregnancy is traumatic so she probably was in pain as well! To have the audacity to ask says all about your character that I need to know.
@@flashthecorgi2053 I hear you but as stated, alot of people don't know how to be empathetic or handle loss. We are human and we miss the mark, constantly. I mean, years ago..I had no character. After I turned my heart to Jesus..I changed. I just don't want this lady to be divorced.
@@danilaroche1156 I'm a man who dismisses a lot of things when I feel powerless. Treating your wife like this is a massive character flaw and it is evident. If the "lord" is close to the brokenhearted and binds their wounds, he's got a lot of explaining to do for parents watching their children die in the hospital
If he’s “asking” he’s already got a side chick, or five...As a father of three awesome kids, and a husband of a wife who’s had a couple miscarriages, TAKE OUT THE TRASH! How terrible if there were kids involved watching their dad run a’muck…
@@fpm3121 my husband is a whole blessing. We still do special things for our little gift in heaven. But it's not the minimum. People are super focused on themselves and their own pain and struggles. Sometimes we need to allow for grace where we need grace given.
I feel for her, she is choosing not to come to terms with who her husband really is. About 6 years ago I was 12 weeks pregnant with our third child. We had trouble getting pregnant (took us 19 months after 2 very easy pregnancies prior). At this same time, someone we both knew called me and asked me to take her to get an abortion (this was her 6th or 7th abortion) and my husband was LIVID! It actually didn't bother me (her calling and asking) but my hubby's immediate response was "how dare her ask you that when she knows you're pregnant and what we went through". Even after over 20 years together, my hubby always puts my feelings first, because that's what he is supposed to do.
My husband didn't understand the breathe of our miscarriage until months into it. We tried to become foster parents in 2019 and that didn't work. adoption was the last option after fertility cancer on his side and major hormonal based seizures on my side made traditional parenthood impossible. But once we both sad down with our grief and got it we got it. I had a psuedopregnacy. My tits grew, my periods stopped, the whole nine years for that 14 months of prep work. I still grieve that picture of having children in our home often. Sometimes daily other times it takes 6 months in-between to get a trigger big enough to burst my bubble. But now twice a year we have a scheduled mourning day for our health and nother one for our family. The other 363 days a year we try to build the cool fun uncle life. But even , 9 years cancer free and 4 years after the miscarriage caused me to nearly drink myself to death, we grieve our children. I'm sad today because I found out one of my greatest friends is having a second baby. We are of course thrilled for them but sometimes this coming weekend I'm gonna have to sit our marriage down and have a greif meeting about it. Cause it hurts and that level of pain demands to be felt. Either we can schedule it or the tsunami can wash us away. You're absolutely right that I felt betrayed by my body when I realized if would be too risky for us. This year after housing it in a freezer since 2014 we signed papers to destroy his sperm. Having children in the home is not an option for us and that's all I wanted growing up. To have happy children because mine was not. Well because of all that trauma I've helped 3 women in my life grieve a miscarriage, we have hosted 4 roommates in our time because we have the space. I can do on the ground work with Wichita 's homeless because I don't worry about the two year old and baby sitter at home if I get caught up in a deep conversation with someone. We had the ability to share food with strangers because (until the recent economic collapse) we had the space and time to spare. Because of these fertility issues I've started an important discussion in our area about fertility loss and what that means for a marriage. Most of my generation (29) has been poisoned with "every girl needs the estrogen pill" and all the plastics and more we just didn't know about until now. Then the next generation (Alpha) is being targeted with hormone therapies that will turn them into eunichs. No one in Christianity is talking about what to do with a marriage that can't have children. Finally enough people like me wrote to our public priests (like patristic nectar productions or Orthobros etc) about what marriage means without children... It's a cross my marriage is forced to bear but it's a powerful tool for change now that I'm understanding how to live with it. You are no less a woman for a broken body. You are no less a husband for only providing for a family of two. Your marriage is whole with two people trying against the world to save each other. You can still do amazing great things even if that amazing great thing isn't what you planned for yourself.
She started by describing him as a perfect partner except for __(blank)__. Once John got deeper, it was like “he asked to sleep with someone else at the beginning of this month”. OMFG! Are you kidding me, girl?! He is not a good man! That is not ok.
I think this level of low selfworth starts in childhood and was likely already established by her mother. She said her mother isn't very loving or caring so she modelled her adult relationships after that. She thinks it's normal not to expect love and care from those closest to you. It's very sad. It will take a lot of time and therapy for her to untie this knot and stop making excuses for those who aren't treating her right.
I had 3 miscarriages and it almost broke me. Looking back now I can’t believe I came out the other end. I had maybe one or 2 people who were supportive, some who didn’t want to talk as it made them uncomfortable and others who almost were offended by my grief and made me feel I had to hide it. The feelings when someone has a miscarriage are very real and shouldn’t just be shrugged off, the insensitivity of other people is unbelievable.
Mark that down, girl. A lack of empathy is a red flag. She’s going to find out pretty quickly that her husband is definitely not someone she can rely on. That lack of empathy reaches demonic levels as the marriage progreses
You cant fully communicate with your HUSBAND or you're afraid he'll leave you for other women? Sweetheart. Your marriage is not healthy with this apparently perfect man.
Had an ectopic last year and its one of the hardest things ive ever had to grieve. My heart breaks for any other momma that has experienced pregnancy loss
Celina, you deserve better! There is a man out there who will love you for exactly who you are, give you the support you need, and will not require you to silence your feelings and needs for their convenience. Good luck!
He is perfect. Apart from yelling, drinking, flirting, dismissing me and wanting sex with other women. I am pretty against this 'just divorce him' trend but in this case ..JUST DIVORCE HIM
I lost a baby many years ago. My ex-husband said he really didn’t want another kid anyway. My MIL said no one in our family ever had this happen before. Luckily my grandmother was so good to me. I was very young and was so distraught and cried for months. Listening to this brought all those feelings back again.
I wonder why he did not offer her therapy through that app he pushes? If anyone needed it, it’s this woman. I hope she followed through. Her little laugh after every painful disclosure tells me that she will discredit herself when no one else will do it for her. So sad.
My husband didn't really care when we had a miscarriage around 10 weeks with our second baby. It killed me. I spent a lot of time crying in the shower. I know he loves me and he loves our kids but he didn't feel the connection I felt . THat was my baby. I found out early I was pregnant and I was so excited. It affected everything in my life losing that pregnancy. We've had 3 babies since. I still have whatever came out of me in a box over 14 years later. He would think it was garbage. I think it is the only thing i have left of the 10 weeks with that baby. My husband can be kind of cold with certain things after 28 years I've gotten mostly used to his cold heart in regards to certain things.
I just have to add my husband is nothing like this loser after listening to the whole call. My word, what an effing asshole her husband sounds like!! Unbelievable.
Oregon Coast Mama, I'm so sorry for your loss and your husband's lack of support around that. Have you heard Dr. John say that grief demands a witness? It sounds like if you had to shed your tears in the shower, you may still need a witness to that grief. That could be a grief counselor if your family and friends can't do it. I also wonder if it would help to give the lost hopes and dreams of your baby that are contained in that box a burial with an actual grave marker. Hugs to you. My heart breaks for you and for this caller.
This made me cry… I want to share but I hide my secret… and this brought it up… thank you Dr. John 😢😢😢 I def needed to hear it was valid and I’m still grieving 2 years later
I totally understand him being emotionally shut down. We had an ectopic pregnancy in 2021, and while my wife was in surgery I was a sobbing mess in the lobby of a hospital. After surgery I had to pull myself together and take care of her. 3 years later it’s still hard to engage the topic emotionally. But the fact he immediately went to the thought of other women is fucking insane. She needs to leave him.
Yes, this marriage was a big mistake. I guess they decided it after a drunk rev party. They aren't equal in the first place. He allows her to adore him. But he doesn't love her.
Wow I can’t begin to understand what the heck is going on here with their marriage… it’s a one side marriage. I feel horrible for her. I can’t believe she wants to stay with this worth less peace of crap… 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Two weeks after her miscarriage, for "his birthday" her husband asks to be with another woman? I'd have filed for divorce that day. Seriously. He isn't going to let this go.
Don’t walk run to the lawyer’s office. The husband is a cruel, self centered, and childish man-boy. That look of love and empathy speaks volumes of his lack of character. Things will only get worse - partners support each other. He can’t/won’t cut your losses and leave ASAP. I’m sorry for your loss.
Run to the hills, he’s a monster
And where is the perfect man she spoke of?
@@testaccount01336 yeah, there's not a single thing she said about him that made him a good husband
Yes, the "for his birthday" thing, apart from being grossly insensitive, means that he actually isn't someone who will be a good father. He does not have enough empathy for those around him, only his Johnson it seems.
I've had two ectopics, and although I was not as deeply sad about it as this caller (only a little sad), I think I would have been grossed out by "but hey, it's birthday time!".
Man, she straight out said “he is perfect in every way” and then talked about how she is afraid that he will leave. 🤦🏽♂️ Then proceeded to talk about him recently asking to sleep with someone else 2 weeks after they lost a baby. This is wild. I hope she leaves.
It’s called codependency
She won't leave. He's apparently perfect in every way except empathy, maturity, and respect.
Sadly many in USA is still so dependent on men for money. It is crazy
@lindalund9621 No wonder 4B is a thing.
What is a 4B?@@toomuchinformation
Yeah. When my ex yelled at me for not getting the house clean during a miscarriage, I knew it was over.
Uh yeah. Definitely.
Valid
Men have no clue what we go through
What?!!!!?
My ex made me get up and cook for our children on the day of surgery. Surgery I had to have because he brought me HPV.
POS is still worthless, decades later.
He wants WHAT for his birthday after his wife had a miscarriage?!?!?
He deserves a birthday slap.
I hope that she finds a good counselor.
That's terrible advice. If you slap a man, be prepared to be slapped back or worse.
She should just leave and let that be the end of it. Do not put yourself in a position where you're inviting someone to put their hands on you.
I was thinking more like a tall oak tree . . . ;-)
@@Chet_24 Calm down. I don't think she means that literally.
I hope that she finds a good divorce lawyer.
She needs a good attorney!
Her self-worth is on the floor
You are so, so, so right. She has no clue how much this is true, either. A threesome two weeks after a miscarriage and get over it?!?!? 😭
Her husband kicked her down to the floor so much for so long that she thinks it’s normal.
@@pandabear7177Equal rights. Not forced to stay anymore. Not a victim.
@@hillarybillary21You need to research the psychology of victims and domestic abusers. She absolutely is a victim.
@@hillarybillary21What an idiotic ignorant comment.
Her body was still healing from losing a baby but he could only think about what her body could do for him. That hurts.
It's like 90% of all men.
@@flyandshy00That's generous.
@@flyandshy00 no its not
It it's when we are talking about younger men, like the age of the one married to the caller
She’s in a toxic, narcissistic relationship. She is severely codependent and needs a good therapist right away.
She’s only 33, she needs to run and file for divorce, take the kids and don’t look back. She’s wasted 10 years already on this POS.
“He’s perfect in every way except THIS,” then proceeds to list 10 more examples of how he’s a terrible, selfish person.
That man is cheating on his wife every single chance he gets. He’s very aware when she’s off from a mile away because he thinks she knows something she shouldn’t.
I cried when she said that he said that 2 weeks after she lost her baby. It’s horrific what some people will put up with in relationships. I hope she finds her self worth and leaves that disgusting man.💔
Why? The child was spared from this world. I dont understand why you people want to selfishly bring another child into this world. I wish women couldn't have kids. I hope this happens more often. The child is way better off not having to deal with this world. I say the child was lucky that he/she did not get born.
@@user-jr7nb8bz4vWould you say the same thing to someone who lost an older born child? Have some compassion for people's pain.
@@user-jr7nb8bz4vyou need help
@@user-jr7nb8bz4v You certainly don't.
I love how he called her out on “you’ve been protecting him for so long we can’t unwind this in a phone call”
Never be with a man that your scared will divorce you
That is not good advice, because that, in certain cases, has to do with your own insecurities.
My ex was convinced I would cheat one day, he never trusted me, he thought I would leave him whenever I announced a surprise or a gift.
In the end, he self-sabotaged, he cheated on me and probably not just once, and he dumped me. And then tried to get me back.
I néver, éver did anything that was even giving another man attention, let alone cheat on him. I knew he was insecure, he didn't like it if I spoke to men. So only rarely, did I speak to men, I usually stayed near him or sat with women.
Work on yourself, if you are scared for no reason that he will leave. Therapy.
Remember she said her husband is perfect in every way. I'm glad Dr. John checked her on that! Seems like relationship is all about his wants. So sad.
I’ve never been so shocked and disgusted by one of these calls, she has no idea just how terrible her husband is too she’s so used to everything being about his wants. I really really hope she leaves this dirtbag.
Yeah it's a shocker
It's more common than you know.
It's time to stop making excuses for inappropriate behavior.
Clearly he didn’t even want to get married. People who “open their relationship” even before marriage are a serious red flag. If one person isn’t good enough when you’re young, they never will be.
Her judgment in marrying him was way off
@@kristinrichmond8185be real it was probably for money
She's lucky they didn't got an STD, that's why I don't like open relationships, nothing good comes from that
Wow. When John calls someone an a**hole, you know it's legit. I hope this precious lady left the psychopath she called a husband. Praying for you tonight, Sister❤️🙏❤️🙏
🎯🎯
She described him as perfect, then followed with he wants to bone another woman right after her miscarriage?? GIRL, my jaw hit the floor. Your husband is trash, pick up the signs. I feel so bad for her
I had this exact same reaction to this call. Like what kind of mirage is she looking at if she thinks that is “perfect”.
This demon possession, bring other people your bedroom, is not health, he might be a good person but moral wise this definitely not a good humans behavior! Pray 🙏 put God first the center of your life! Then everything shall give to you!!!🙏🙏🙏
Feel worse for the kids she brought into that crappy situation with a mother with no self respect. There's no chance she's able to be a good parent to them. It's tragic and she needs help for their sake.
@@temposhop8739 I feel for the kids who have a shitty dad and a mom who seems to have little to no self worth, yeah
NAHHHHH SHES GOIN TO STAY!! THEY ALWAYS ALWAYS UGHHH ALWAYS STAY!!
This is why we as women need to stop trying to be the "cool" wife/girlfriend. She did something she didnt want to do to keep him, and he most likely isnt the person for her anyway. She should have said no and goodbye she could have been 10 years down the road with the man who is actually meant for her.
Your re Absolutely right she was just a pick me girl so she has no power in the marriage. She's probably a SAHM with no financial resources of her own. She's definitely trapped.
Yes. It’s toxic “femininity.” Go along to get along. But at what cost?! 🤮
The way she makes excuses for him and tries to blame herself… so common. I have done the same thing. And it is hard to recognize how ridiculous you are being defending someone who doesn’t even care about you. I hope she sees the light eventually.
Agreed. I'm in her situation and I can honestly say I haven't seen the light yet lol
Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood
The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker
Safe People by Henry Cloud
Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
Celina! You deserve man who thinks of your feelings. You deserve more.
This is so heartbreaking.
Yea… but she doesn’t have one. So what is she supposed to do?
@@Gxport she needs to talk to a professional to decide that. I think she should leave.
NAHHHHHH, SHES GOIN TO STAY!! THEY ALWAYS ALWAYS UGHHH ALWAYS STAY!!
No, work isn’t a distraction from grief it’s a distraction to not deal with a wife in pain because he can’t be bothered to think about anyone but himself. In my completely untrained opinion.
Work is often a distraction for men so they don’t have to deal with emotions at home. That is 💯 factual.
You don't speak for everyone.
The red flags were there early on in their relationship especially when he wanted threesomes which made her (and would make most women) uncomfortable. Him wanting another woman a couple of weeks after she miscarried is disgraceful. He doesn`t give a damn about her. A miscarriage is very traumatic for a woman to go through.
OK at literally another time I'd agree with that. BUT right after her miscarriage absolutely not.
Women CHOOSE to make miscarriages a big deal. 3 weeks? That is ridiculously unreasonable.
@@SarahConnor562 did you have kids afterwards ?
@@SarahConnor562 Glad to hear.
@@ineedhoez don’t talk about something you can’t even remotely comprehend. Even if it’s 3 weeks, it’s a life growing inside of you and it’s immensely upsetting.
This miscarriage was actually a blessing. This relationship is so toxic and this woman is so blindly making excuses for her husband. It's sad. This is not love.
@@user-jr7nb8bz4vstop commenting so much on this video dude people can see how much you comment it’s obsessive :/
@@marshmallowcereal718so what?
That's what I I was thinking, even though a miscarriage is painful, it was the best not to have a child with him
What a demented thing to say a child died it's a tragedy
@@cathalhendron3941as a woman who’s personally had a miscarriage and a rainbow baby (baby after miscarriage) there is Nothing demented about that comment, when I had my miscarriage is should have listened to what God was trying to tell me, instead I got pregnant again by the same man who is a demonic monster. I love my children but I should have took the hint when I had my miscarriage! Having a child with an actual psychopath is Not something to negate!
"He's perfect in every other way...." proceeds to tell us that TWO WEEKS after she loses a baby he asked her for another 3 some. Girl, is this really the kind of guy you want raising your future children? This is how you want them to see a wife treated? Nah, babe. Get out of there. You're not afraid of him dropping a bomb. The bomb has already been dropped and you don't want to turn around to see the devastation.
Well put. There are pieces of her poor heart lying all over the ground. It's a husband's responsibility to care for and cherish it.
That's EXACTLY what I was thinking. She's worth so much more than that.
They already have children together. They all have A names she said.
@@Luckoftheirish1 Yeah. I can't imagine their divorce being decent or fair with this guy. It's gonna suck all around. Praying for the kids.
the caller's husband is glad there was a miscarriage. a new baby will ruin his threesomes..
She just does not get the fact her husband is of no character or morals. Sad
Character: "the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual."
He has mental, he is an idiot, that's a mental.
Moral: "holding or manifesting high principles for proper conduct." "When faced with a situation where a baby is lost, it is essential for both parents, including the husband, to maintain composure and handle the situation with care and responsibility. Here are some principles for proper conduct in such a challenging circumstance:
1. Stay Calm: It's crucial to remain calm and composed, as panicking can hinder your ability to think clearly and take necessary actions. Keep a level head to support your partner and engage in effective problem-solving.
2. Support Your Spouse: Losing a baby is an incredibly difficult experience for both parents. Offer emotional support and be there for your spouse, allowing them to express their feelings and providing a safe space for them to grieve.
3. Communicate Effectively: Maintain open and honest communication with your spouse during this challenging time. Share your thoughts, fears, and concerns with each other, and actively listen to one another. Effective communication helps in providing mutual comfort and support.
4. Seek Professional Help: Losing a baby can cause intense grief and emotional distress. It may be helpful to consult with a professional counselor or therapist who specializes in grief and loss. They can provide guidance, support, and coping strategies tailored to your specific needs.
5. Lean on Your Support Network: Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or support groups who can offer empathy and understanding. Sharing your feelings and experiences with others who have gone through a similar situation can provide solace and comfort.
6. Take Care of Yourself: While it's important to support your spouse, remember to prioritize your own well-being as well. Ensure you're getting enough rest, eating well, and engaging in self-care activities that help you cope with the emotional strain.
7. Be Patient: Grief is a complex process, and healing takes time. Be patient with yourself and your spouse as you navigate through this difficult period. Everyone's healing journey is unique, so allow yourself and your partner the space and time needed to heal.
8. Honor the Memory of Your Baby: Find ways to honor and remember your baby. This could involve creating a memorial, planting a tree, or participating in activities that hold significance for you and your spouse. Remembering your baby can provide comfort and a sense of closure.
Remember, everyone copes with loss differently, so it's essential to respect each other's unique grieving process. Seek support from professionals and loved ones as you work through your emotions, and remember that healing is possible with time and support." He seems calm, supportive as in getting money to the family (the wrong way thou), his communicating his wants and needs, seems like his not going to a professional, don't know if he's talking with his family, is getting enough rest, doesn't seem patient, and doesn't seem to honor it.
Over all, as she describes him he seems like a mix bag. One that she chose and now she's going to have to sit and decide her course of action.
With that being said, she is in grief and may be misrepresenting him. It doesn't seem fair to value judgments and identity judgment, asking for what hi "is", rather than what his doing, based on a single point of data.
@@SarahConnor562 Why do you feel that you nagging need to protect and advocate for men specifically trash men in public ? What do you get out of it?
Yet she keeps popping out his kids. There is a point when I'm tempted to blame her more than him.
@@Shaara1agreed. Everyone's talking about how she puts him before herself, but what about those poor kids? There's no way she's doing right by them.
A codependent ex friend put my life in danger pleasing her man. I don't even live in the same town as they do.
Our culture doesn't care about people's grief around miscarriage, even other women don't care. I was 7 weeks along and miscarried while I was at work. I told my manager I needed to go home and possibly the hospital, and she was like "we are down 2 people and don't have anyone to cover your shift. Think you can power through it?". So I did. I was young and stupid. I worked 8 hours on my feet that day, bleeding the whole time and sobbing in the back room on my breaks.
I’m so sorry you went through that all alone
😮💔💔💔
Oh my goodness. How absolutely traumatic. If no one else has said it, I really am sorry for your loss and the loss of whatever humanity you thought your coworkers had.
@ericabrown7354 because one is intentional killing of another human life and the other is a genetic abnormality out of your control.
@ericabrown7354 Because having an abortion is a choice and having a miscarriage is something that happens to someone completely against their will. Why even ask such a ridiculous question?
Dr. Delony showed a lot of maturity and professionalism when the threesome bombshell dropped. Dude didn't even flinch.
It was also kinda funny how He said all the things her husband should have at the start of the call.
He’s not perfect , you’ve just lowered your standards so you won’t be disappointed when they let you down again.
She needs to wake up and walk away. Her mom is useless too.
I get the impression that she's so desperately in love with him that she'll do absolutely anything to hold on to him even when it's detrimental to herself. I hope she gets the help she needs.
Her man is a douche bag. For the fact that she allows for him to be with other women he sees her as a doormat. And he will get anything he wants . She has major self esteem issues .
@@gabrielamartiniuc6322 yep. It’s sad that these are the kind of guys us nice guys are losing to.
Just think she's helpless, she's probably a SAHM/has no job prospects soo that's a rough go during a divorce
@@mikenelson8377 The fact that your first thought is “sad that nice guys like me don’t get to stick our d**ks in them instead ” means that you’re a garbage human, and not very nice at all. You wouldn’t treat her any better.
It's detrimental to the kids, that's the worst part.
I really hope this caller actually goes to see a therapist because her family is wiping the floor with her self esteem and she really doesn’t think she is worth even basic human decency.
I love Dr John’s protectiveness. My husband is protective like this as well, every women deserves a man that is protective of her feelings.
Not every woman is interested in men
The husband doesn’t see her as a human. Run run run. You deserve better!
women are not all humans
No some of us have super powers @@annaolokede4582
I hear my old self in this caller 😢 I used to laugh, too, when sharing horrific things. I can _hear_ the grief and pain behind your laughter.
Not being supported by your mom and husband when you are grieving the loss of a child _is horrific._
Celina, you are worth having the time to grieve. You are worth having the family around you grieve with you, or at least sit with you and hold you as you grieve, for however long it takes.
A man asking you or telling you that he wants a threesome is a huge red flag. You are enough, my friend. Maybe not for him, but that means he isn't the guy for you. You have a heart of gold and want a committed, loving, monogamous relationship. He doesn't want this. Don't try to change him. Don't feel like you have to prove to him you're enough. You deserve better!! Don't you want to be with someone where you are their one and only?? It exists! I promise you.
My ex husband wanted more people in our bedroom, he wanted kink and gross stuff and it kept getting worse. The adult websites he frequented as our intimate life dried up for years, it was heartbreaking. Soul crushing.
You. Deserve. Better.
You just have to come to _realize_ and _truly believe_ that you deserve better. ❤
I did it. You can, too!
Please read "The Life Saving Divorce" and "Healing from Hidden Abuse".
I'm sending you the biggest hug and my tears. My heart hurts with you for the loss of your beautiful child ❤ and the "husband" who is selfish beyond measure.
I hope she reads your caring and encouragement for her. I'm glad you're doing better in your Life.
Your comment touched my heart. What a kind person you are. You’ve been through a lot.
It's a coping mechanism
My heart goes out to her. She allowed the disrespect early on in the relationship, and participated in it. I hope she gets the help she needs, and that she gets an opportunity to be honest with her husband, and figure out if this is the lifestyle he wants to continue. She needs to figure out what she wants.
He is never thinking anything but his wishes. Run, run as fast and as far as you can. You deserve better, anyone does.
As someone who met her (now ex) husband at a music festival and spent the beginning of our relationship on drugs (that he was supplying) and totally wrecked my brain chemistry… you cannot stay with this man. He is not the same man you “fell in love with” and he is totally inconsiderate and possibly narcissistic. You deserve so so so much better, love.
Dr. JOHN needs to be more direct and tell her to divorce that man! The marriage cannot be saved. She needs to go heal and hopefully, she'd find someone who truly loves her. Leave! Now!
I had a healthy pregnancy in 2020. Tried for #2 exactly 1 year ago and had 2 consecutive miscarriages. It shattered me. Your feelings are so valid and I’m so sorry. Miscarriage completely changed me as a person, no matter how early the loss was. I am now 36 weeks today with my double rainbow baby. Please hang in there and trudge through this pain. It’s so, so unbearable at times. I wish you healing and peace.
She protected her husband just like she protected her mom when either of them used her for their own emotional insecurities.
I guess we all do that, even my mom has done that even though my dad has never defend her from anyone
How utterly sad on so many levels. 😭
Your empathy and sympathy are absolutely mindblowning, while being transparent as well. Thank you Dr. John. I can always gleam something from your shows. This ended up being harder to listen to than I had imagined, for a lot of reasons. My heart breaks for this girl, who loves this good for nothing ass man more than her self. I hope she realizes one day she is enough.
She should tell him he can be with another woman whenever he wants as soon as he moves out.
John called it! He is an A-bleep!!!!
🎯 it’s funny that they only bleep out “hole” but not the A- word
@@klickingkayasmr7585cuz ass could be considered a donkey so no need to censor
Dr. John's bleeped opinion of the husband was my word to describe him exactly. It's like the wife married someone with a similar emotional range as her mother. He wants permission to cheat (this one openly, at least, as I'm not convinced he's ever been faithful) after she lost her baby. I'm outraged for her. I think that Dr. John's advice is spot on. She needs to have someone outside of her loser household to tell her that she and her feelings are worthwhile. If he doesn't step way up and go way out of his way to be there for her, and commit to the relationship, she should find the strength to get out.
No, there is nothing here to save. This has NEVER been a marriage, it's been a farce from the beginning.She needs to pick up her self-respect from the dungeon she's ALLOWED him to put it in, get her children, file for divorce and get him OUT of her life once and for all. This man is a demon and as such, needs to be sent back to his natural habitat-and we know where demons come from, so we know where that is.🔥👹👺👿😈🔥🔥🔥🌋
My heart hurts for Celina.
I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks
It took me 3 months to heal from my lost
I'm lucky I had my husband and mom supporting me.
I hope she knows she's worth more than she thinks. You are a wonderful person and you deserve better Celina 💕
3 months isn't long
early miscarriages happen so often,3 months is enough time to get over it, i speak from experience
@petrap1769 a pain that is with you forever honestly.
It was 3 months of feeling like absolutely nothingness
@@petrap1769Just because you "got over it" doesn't mean everyone else does. Learn compassion.
Ugh! My parents disregarded my pregnancy loss so I didn’t even tell them I was pregnant till much later the next time. I’m so sorry you are going through this with your family. This is so tough!
I'm sorry that happened to you
The self-worth questioning is brutal. He’s so right about that.
This poor woman. She’s so alone in life. She deserves better.
People, let this be a reminder, the relationship with parents will affect the future of the kid's adult relationships. It's clear that the caller had a mother that didn't show love and of course it carried onto the marriage with her husband.
Exactly! I see this in myself now that my romantic history is in the rearview window. Emotionally unavailable parents, emotionally unavailable partners. It's what I picked in relationships, even though it was completely subconscious.
It sounds like she married her mom.
Yep. He needs to go.
Ohhhh she married her mother! Arg, those generational circles are so hard to break. Been together 10 years with him stepping out. Tried having a baby to keep the marriage together while he is actively trying to rip it apart.
This call is hard to wrap my mind around. The husband is trash. He’s for the streets! Stop defending him. Take off the rose colored glasses and see him for who he is.
He’s not a nice man. He’s not a kind man. He’s not even a respectful man.
He wants to mess with other women and the wife allows it to be the “cool” wife.
It is not about how she sees him. It is about how she sees herself. Not deserving of anything better
@@yhiontop It's both.
14 days post miscarriage probably still bleeding and husband wants another threesome. I'll start swinging. 😢When I was going thru PPD my husband took me on more Date nights and a vacation to help me feel better
Sounds like you have an awesome husband!
Threesomes are yucky
When I had a miscarriage my husband took me on vacation
“I’m tired of my body killing babies” WHEW that hit a nerve 😭
Omg i had to rewind to that BLEEP. 😂 Yip. Thanks Dr D for saying what we were thinking.
Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise that she didn’t have another child with him ! Wth 🤦♀️
She picked up the phone to be vulnerable in an honest way with you Dr John bc she’s desperate for that connection. She doesn’t have that connection with her husband ~ she never had apparently & the same with her own mom
14:05 is when we really know the character about this guy!! Ugh Celina, I’m so sorry! You are worth so much more than a guy saying that to you 14 days after miscarriage. Please find a good counselor to walk with you! ❤️
I don't think it's about character. Some people don't know how to handle loss, grief and pain. Many men want to help but they feel powerless so they dismiss things. Forgive him! Jesus is near. In Proverbs it's says that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted & binds up their wounds.
@@danilaroche1156 for me it’s character! This guy asked 14 days after and also, an ectopic pregnancy is traumatic so she probably was in pain as well! To have the audacity to ask says all about your character that I need to know.
@@flashthecorgi2053 I hear you but as stated, alot of people don't know how to be empathetic or handle loss. We are human and we miss the mark, constantly. I mean, years ago..I had no character. After I turned my heart to Jesus..I changed. I just don't want this lady to be divorced.
@@danilaroche1156 I'm a man who dismisses a lot of things when I feel powerless. Treating your wife like this is a massive character flaw and it is evident. If the "lord" is close to the brokenhearted and binds their wounds, he's got a lot of explaining to do for parents watching their children die in the hospital
@@danilaroche1156did you finish the call? Bc it took a huge turn 😭😭
If he’s “asking” he’s already got a side chick, or five...As a father of three awesome kids, and a husband of a wife who’s had a couple miscarriages, TAKE OUT THE TRASH! How terrible if there were kids involved watching their dad run a’muck…
They do have kids. She doesn’t want to blow up the marriage and her life.
@@Foxie770This pos husband has already blown up the marriage…
And she’s trying to hold on to him 🤢🤮
How blessed am I that my husband grieved and understood my grieving even 6 years later?
So sad the bare MINIMUM a human being should do is seen as a blessing...
@@fpm3121 my husband is a whole blessing. We still do special things for our little gift in heaven.
But it's not the minimum. People are super focused on themselves and their own pain and struggles. Sometimes we need to allow for grace where we need grace given.
I feel for her, she is choosing not to come to terms with who her husband really is. About 6 years ago I was 12 weeks pregnant with our third child. We had trouble getting pregnant (took us 19 months after 2 very easy pregnancies prior). At this same time, someone we both knew called me and asked me to take her to get an abortion (this was her 6th or 7th abortion) and my husband was LIVID! It actually didn't bother me (her calling and asking) but my hubby's immediate response was "how dare her ask you that when she knows you're pregnant and what we went through". Even after over 20 years together, my hubby always puts my feelings first, because that's what he is supposed to do.
That’s a good man.
What a weird and illogical reaction from your husband
@@lilithowlwhat?? He was on her side, what are you talking about?? He knew this person did a horrible thing by asking a dumb question to his wife
My husband didn't understand the breathe of our miscarriage until months into it. We tried to become foster parents in 2019 and that didn't work. adoption was the last option after fertility cancer on his side and major hormonal based seizures on my side made traditional parenthood impossible. But once we both sad down with our grief and got it we got it. I had a psuedopregnacy. My tits grew, my periods stopped, the whole nine years for that 14 months of prep work. I still grieve that picture of having children in our home often. Sometimes daily other times it takes 6 months in-between to get a trigger big enough to burst my bubble. But now twice a year we have a scheduled mourning day for our health and nother one for our family. The other 363 days a year we try to build the cool fun uncle life. But even , 9 years cancer free and 4 years after the miscarriage caused me to nearly drink myself to death, we grieve our children. I'm sad today because I found out one of my greatest friends is having a second baby. We are of course thrilled for them but sometimes this coming weekend I'm gonna have to sit our marriage down and have a greif meeting about it. Cause it hurts and that level of pain demands to be felt. Either we can schedule it or the tsunami can wash us away.
You're absolutely right that I felt betrayed by my body when I realized if would be too risky for us. This year after housing it in a freezer since 2014 we signed papers to destroy his sperm. Having children in the home is not an option for us and that's all I wanted growing up. To have happy children because mine was not.
Well because of all that trauma I've helped 3 women in my life grieve a miscarriage, we have hosted 4 roommates in our time because we have the space. I can do on the ground work with Wichita 's homeless because I don't worry about the two year old and baby sitter at home if I get caught up in a deep conversation with someone. We had the ability to share food with strangers because (until the recent economic collapse) we had the space and time to spare. Because of these fertility issues I've started an important discussion in our area about fertility loss and what that means for a marriage. Most of my generation (29) has been poisoned with "every girl needs the estrogen pill" and all the plastics and more we just didn't know about until now. Then the next generation (Alpha) is being targeted with hormone therapies that will turn them into eunichs. No one in Christianity is talking about what to do with a marriage that can't have children. Finally enough people like me wrote to our public priests (like patristic nectar productions or Orthobros etc) about what marriage means without children...
It's a cross my marriage is forced to bear but it's a powerful tool for change now that I'm understanding how to live with it. You are no less a woman for a broken body. You are no less a husband for only providing for a family of two. Your marriage is whole with two people trying against the world to save each other. You can still do amazing great things even if that amazing great thing isn't what you planned for yourself.
She started by describing him as a perfect partner except for __(blank)__. Once John got deeper, it was like “he asked to sleep with someone else at the beginning of this month”. OMFG! Are you kidding me, girl?! He is not a good man! That is not ok.
I think this level of low selfworth starts in childhood and was likely already established by her mother. She said her mother isn't very loving or caring so she modelled her adult relationships after that. She thinks it's normal not to expect love and care from those closest to you. It's very sad. It will take a lot of time and therapy for her to untie this knot and stop making excuses for those who aren't treating her right.
Of all the times Dr John advised someone against a relationship, I don't remember one where he was this forceful
This story is so sad, I could cry for her and I wish I could hug her…I hope she finds her way out of these and she deserves better.
I was watching this while having my period, I was so emotional I wanted to cry the whole time, this poor woman
What he says at 18:54 is 1000% true. They'd NEVER suggest that kind of activity during grief... wow.
What is that quote from Shakespeare? Oh yes, "He jests at scars who never felt a wound "
John calling her husband an “ass” was incredibly cathartic.
This was an amazing call. The callers openness is amazing.
I had 3 miscarriages and it almost broke me. Looking back now I can’t believe I came out the other end. I had maybe one or 2 people who were supportive, some who didn’t want to talk as it made them uncomfortable and others who almost were offended by my grief and made me feel I had to hide it. The feelings when someone has a miscarriage are very real and shouldn’t just be shrugged off, the insensitivity of other people is unbelievable.
Mark that down, girl. A lack of empathy is a red flag. She’s going to find out pretty quickly that her husband is definitely not someone she can rely on. That lack of empathy reaches demonic levels as the marriage progreses
Sending out a prayer that she gets help and recovers. Hurts my heart to hear her say "He's perfect in every way." Ugh.
You cant fully communicate with your HUSBAND or you're afraid he'll leave you for other women? Sweetheart. Your marriage is not healthy with this apparently perfect man.
She allows it so it’ll never change.
Dr John said the A word. I was shocked 😂
I second John's swearing!
Dr. John is so real here. He opened up, showed his own vulnerability, sensitivity. Bravo. A loving delivery.
Had an ectopic last year and its one of the hardest things ive ever had to grieve. My heart breaks for any other momma that has experienced pregnancy loss
“Things going okay?”
Ummm… If they’re calling, probably not 🤣😂🤣
I answered in my mind… as okay someone calling you can be…
Hubby didn't want a baby to begin with.
She should divorce him and get a husband, who cares about her.
@@kareenodum1734 First she needs to learn to love herself.
@@kareenodum1734the grass isnt always greener
@@funicon3689 Yes, she should do inter work. The green grass will come to her and she will be able to water it.
He never cared about the relationship, he only wanted a body to fu**
Celina, you deserve better! There is a man out there who will love you for exactly who you are, give you the support you need, and will not require you to silence your feelings and needs for their convenience. Good luck!
Her voice sounds so sweet. She sounds like a lovely woman. I hope she finds happiness and peace.
Peace and many blessings, Celina. It's not your fault. ❤
He is perfect. Apart from yelling, drinking, flirting, dismissing me and wanting sex with other women.
I am pretty against this 'just divorce him' trend but in this case ..JUST DIVORCE HIM
Exactly
Yep, she need to value herself and believe it.
I lost a baby many years ago. My ex-husband said he really didn’t want another kid anyway. My MIL said no one in our family ever had this happen before. Luckily my grandmother was so good to me. I was very young and was so distraught and cried for months. Listening to this brought all those feelings back again.
She’s trying to build on a faulty foundation.
I wonder why he did not offer her therapy through that app he pushes? If anyone needed it, it’s this woman. I hope she followed through. Her little laugh after every painful disclosure tells me that she will discredit herself when no one else will do it for her. So sad.
Celina leave him before u have another child with him
My husband didn't really care when we had a miscarriage around 10 weeks with our second baby. It killed me. I spent a lot of time crying in the shower. I know he loves me and he loves our kids but he didn't feel the connection I felt . THat was my baby. I found out early I was pregnant and I was so excited. It affected everything in my life losing that pregnancy. We've had 3 babies since. I still have whatever came out of me in a box over 14 years later. He would think it was garbage. I think it is the only thing i have left of the 10 weeks with that baby. My husband can be kind of cold with certain things after 28 years I've gotten mostly used to his cold heart in regards to certain things.
I just have to add my husband is nothing like this loser after listening to the whole call. My word, what an effing asshole her husband sounds like!! Unbelievable.
Oregon Coast Mama, I'm so sorry for your loss and your husband's lack of support around that. Have you heard Dr. John say that grief demands a witness? It sounds like if you had to shed your tears in the shower, you may still need a witness to that grief. That could be a grief counselor if your family and friends can't do it. I also wonder if it would help to give the lost hopes and dreams of your baby that are contained in that box a burial with an actual grave marker. Hugs to you. My heart breaks for you and for this caller.
gross
why the hell you stay with him
@@funicon3689don't be unkind
What on earth has this woman gone through to have this little amount of selfesteem? 😢
How did we get from “he’s perfect in every way” to “he wants other women and I can’t talk to him bc he’ll leave me”
In just a few minutes! What on earth DOES this guy have going for him??
This woman needs a divorce and tons of therapy
This made me cry… I want to share but I hide my secret… and this brought it up… thank you Dr. John 😢😢😢 I def needed to hear it was valid and I’m still grieving 2 years later
I’m so sorry you lost your baby 😓. Your grief is very valid.
I totally understand him being emotionally shut down. We had an ectopic pregnancy in 2021, and while my wife was in surgery I was a sobbing mess in the lobby of a hospital. After surgery I had to pull myself together and take care of her. 3 years later it’s still hard to engage the topic emotionally. But the fact he immediately went to the thought of other women is fucking insane. She needs to leave him.
Yes, this marriage was a big mistake. I guess they decided it after a drunk rev party.
They aren't equal in the first place. He allows her to adore him. But he doesn't love her.
YES!!! Remove the bleep and let the truth fly.
This was incredibly sad to listen to. I hope she is well now. Would love to hear a follow up.
Wow I can’t begin to understand what the heck is going on here with their marriage… it’s a one side marriage. I feel horrible for her. I can’t believe she wants to stay with this worth less peace of crap… 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬