Wrong Side Of Heaven - Five Finger Death Punch (Reaction - emotional)
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- Опубліковано 4 жов 2019
- We react to Five Finger Death Punch's video for Wrong Side Of Heaven. I sat on the video for a couple days trying to decide if I would even post it. Although I had seen it before my son had not... but I didn't expect to get emotional. I shared why in the reaction and decided to go ahead and edit/post it. I didn't cut any of the reaction because in real life we don't get to erase feelings and things we say.
Original Video: • Five Finger Death Punc... - Розваги
Bless you and your family along with all the past and future veterans. I saw how hard this was for you. Don't have a heavy heart. Sorry for your loss.
I suffer from PTSD from time in combat as infantryman paratrooper with the 82 Airborne Division. It has taken me the better part of a decade to even begin to truly admit I need help. For any veteran who is having a difficult time there are programs out there for us. Hombase in Boston MA your discharge means nothing they want to help us all.
first of all i want to thank you for posting such a moving video.and i served 14 years in the U.S army,and people like you show me my service and sacrifice was worth it.and tell everyone about this video so you can get help for my fellow veterans.i have been homeless now for 10 years i live in the woods i can take care of my self i gather or catch what i need to eat.i know i will die in these woods it is ok i am at peace with that,in my death i might feed some hungry animal.but please get the word out to help my fellow veterans.
Want to watch a good one check out Gone Away by FFDP as an Army Vet I love how much they love the troops ps .. if you do you watch the video the bracelets on his wrists are K.I.A ,M.I.A and or P.O.W Memorial bracelets..just a little info on it
Keep up the good work guys.
Man, those silver eyes are magnificent my dude.
Because seeing a female, he sees innocence. But seeing the devil, he sees evil and destruction.
You guys should react to "heavy flamer heresy" by TheRussianBadger. I'm sure you guys will like it.
In another reaction to this video she suggested that it's possible that God meant his mother and Devil meant his dad.
Referring to God as " she" is something alot of the troops that fought in Iraq /Afghanistan did.
Wrong side of heaven= Breaking 1 of God's 10 commandments, "Thou shall not kill".
Righteous side of hell= By breaking God's commandment, the Devil says keep going so I get more souls.
I'm a Canadian combat veteran and worn my boots out on the same grounds as all my fellow brothers/sisters in arms from all allied forces. I lost many of them, them that I got to know, grown to love and fought along side of them at one point or another. Being injured myself (lower back injury due to being thrown in the air 20 feet) and having my back twisted like a pretzel. Coming home wasn't easy, I lost my wife and 3 kids, house, car, unable to get a job since I was a career soldier (that worked for a living) after being deployed in many different countries and I could of continued my career from a small office with being tied to an armchair due to no longer being deployed to the field of battle as a militant, the closest I could be to a battle field would of been the green zone at HQ command post, but by that time, I was too far gone and didn't want to finish my career back home to deal with paperwork and training new officers. So after a while, I put my papers in and was honorably discharged. And now, I'm on disability barely making ends meet while living in a scrummy 1 and a half apartment with roaches and my service cat instead of our family home with 5 bedroom, 3 bathroom, double garage, huge pie lot (huge backyard) in the perfect neighbor hood to raise kids with schools and hospital both in walking distance. Heck I have a clerk that works at a pastry shop and has known me for a while, so she keeps the daily pastries that didn't sell which they usually throw in the garbage so that I can pick them up for myself and bring some to the shelter for others to eat. Please don't tell me that at least I'm alive because I am barely surviving and that's not being alive.
But after a year and few months later after my return, my wife filled for divorce and full custody of the kids, so, I lost friends/family and everything which made me roam the streets for about a year and a few months. Till I got long over due therapy which definitely helped, but not enough to get my head above water long enough to get out of it's clutches, which pulled me back in within it's depth. Now, there isn't a day that goes by where I don't wish to just be put out of my misery. I take about 21 different meds for all kind of ailments for a total of 36 pills every 24hrs, from depression/PTSD meds and of various meds, starting with heart condition and pain killers every 12 hours 24/7 for my injuries plus one shot a week for TRT and can barely step outside due to becoming agoraphobic to the point of where I have to sedate myself with Xanax and/or/both Clonazepam in order to being like a zombie just to step out of my apartment and after two suicide attempts for which I have no regrets other than not succeeding in order to put an end to the pain. I don't understand why I survived where better men than me didn't. These last few days have a very specific meanings and one is a very specific date, that's where and when I watch this particular video on many other specific dates during the year, so that I can feel the hard pain of still being alive while they are not. And I'm not talking just about my Canadian brothers/sisters but also my American brothers, Belgium brothers, Australian brothers, British brothers, and all my other brothers and sisters in arms from all allied forces including our interpreters.
Everything is a trigger, loud noises, trucks, smells of diesel fuel and too many people around at the hospital or when needing to do groceries, that I can no longer do, plus never watching any war movies (which is amongst the top 3 things that trigger me, so that's been a big no no for over a decade and longer). So now, I go to the nearest convenience store between 2 and 4 am because no ones around and I can buy my weekly food there, like sandwiches, frozen meals and everything and anything to last me at least a week, which costs me a arm and a leg in prices compared to doing regular groceries that would feed me for the month and much so much more less expensive than the local convenience store, though I had an assigned social worker that would accompany me on any of those outings where I needed to step outside my apartment and in the process had to sedate myself in order of being able to step outside, for either hospital appointments and groceries and/or just driving to a nice specific place where we used to go, which was by a lake within the city but far enough to not hear any traffic of any kind, which we haven't been able to do for the last 2 yrs due to Covid19 protocols.
So, his presence and choice of conversations helped me cope with my anxiety and this for the last 7yrs but haven't been no longer able to do so, due to the new Covid19 protocols which forbids them to have patients in their cars and this for the last two years, same thing with my therapist whom I used to meet with one day a week every week. Those new rules really had an affect on me, even though I could have my sessions by phone, it was definitely not the same. My social worker now comes and meets me once a week in the parking lot while drinking our coffees but still can't even sit in his vehicle and him still not being allowed to enter my apartment. So, all the progress we had achieved before Covid19 has regressed back to the beginning. Heck I haven't even done my dishes in 6+ months and now using carboard plates with plastic utensils, while my dirty dishes are in my kitchen sink with mold of multiple color have started to grow and smell, so I run hot water and add a strong cleaning agent with the hot running water to kill the smell.
Even my wash of clothing hasn't been done for the same time frame and I've pretty much used all my clean clothing and asked my social worker if he could buy me some underwear at the local Walmart which he's done a lot of times (so yes I do have clean underwear till I've used them all and ask the same favor from my social worker again and again).
Now there's just too many dishes to clean and too much laundry to be done, which I cant do, due to my back injury, there's just no way I can just stand there for 45 mins straight to clean everything plus do laundry in the apartment laundry mat because that would mean staying in the laundromat for a couple of hours. I even looked at special cleaning companies specialized is such messes, but I can't afford their service. So the bigger the messes grow, the more it brings me down, There's definitely no pride of ownership here.
I shower about once a week instead of every day like I used to and with all that said, I even had my twitter account suspended where I used to talk with other vets from all over which was amazingly helpful because, many of them are in the same dark place I am right now, while others who were in the exact same place I was/am but they came out on the other side whole and defeated their demons. Thus the suspension of my account due to me speaking the truth of how vets were treated plus some conservatives views. All this happened right after Biden was elected and the CCOVID 19 was making the most damages, till one day I was awaken, only to find out that my biggest tool towards recovery was taken away from me from me. Now my biggest tools are the meds I take and help to try to sleep for as many hours as my prescriptions can help me do so. I have to be careful as to what I watch on tv or computer, I need to pick and choose safe contents in hopes to not get triggered, heck even some family commercials now trigger me. This has been my hell for the last decades and a half or so and I feel I deserve it in some many ways.
People tend to forget, that allied forces also lost many men through the long past 2 decades. A Canadian, or Australian, Belgium and British head explodes the same way as a USA's soldier's head when struck by a 7.62 caliber bullet, which doesn't discriminate (hence why I lost too many of my American brothers/sisters that I collaborated and fought beside with), In the end blood splatter and brain matter getting all over you is the same for all soldiers in active combat, no matter which flags they are wearing on their shoulder.
Not a day goes by where I don't break down in tears for no reasons, then the flashbacks take over, be it through night-terrors/nightmares or even when awake day-nightmares awaken by a trigger, it doesn't take much for a bad thought creeping into your mind, and once that happens, the flood gates open and everything overwhelms you and the memories strike hard. And this just because of one thought that found it's way into your mind, the rest just follows and you can't do sh*t about it. The two last decades and change, has affected many active combatant from many different countries and their blood is all the same color.
FACTA NON VERBA!
And that's why I MAGA hard !
He referred to god as she ,meaning his wife
React to more lil peep