I used to feel the same way about needing pain to make art. It started that way for me too. And like you, it was necessary for my healing. Now that I’ve moved on from those struggles and feel mostly bliss, I create from a far deeper and clearer place. It’s very powerful and unfiltered. It’s a very spiritual experience. I consider art “channeling” in a way. It’s an incredible experience. I need to maintain my creative practice to keep the balance though
Saturn return started extra early for me! i was about 25-26 and it was transiting my sun first. im aquarius sun stellium, 3H, and cap stellium 2H. sag rising and part of my cap stellium is jupiter. i have saturn cnj venus in the 4H of pisces. my themes have been very obvious and in my face. quiting weed, learning to set boundaries from crazy obsessive, scary men, sorta becoming my parents parent after my grandmother passed on when i was 27 in 2023. but that role didnt come till i moved back home after taking care of my grandmothers house for almost a year before my uncle came home and moved in by suprise. he co-owns the house with my mother. i took great care of the home, started to enjoy keeping a beautiful home, but when i moved back into my parents house, they were like hoarders 😭😭 i fell into depression with them for a while, but snapped out of it and started to deep clean, sort, throw things out and take care of the cats. its been like this for a while but theyre coming back to their senses. quitting weed was liberating, as ive been stuck on it for the better half of a decade, and im finally starting to step into selling my art for money. ive always felt so blocked from it, but im coming out of my shell. i was lucky enough to be born with the memory of drawing. but i had never used it to acquire wealth till now. because ive been getting layed off from or quitting every job i had 😂😂 i want to make decent money and take my parents on a beautiful vacation this year. during this transit, i also started fantasizing about moving to nyc. my venus ic line in astrocartography. im in rural nova scotia, my chrion mc line, so its a massive change im excited to attempt. i am also certified to do reiki/energy healing and have a connection to spirit. ive only done it for free when i was in a good place, but once im in a better place, ill start charging for it. im excited for the transit to finally end in 2026, but until then, ill be making sure my parents stay safe and healthy, the best i can
Right now, I’m on my final months of my first Saturn return in my 8th house. My whole life got flipped upside down and I had to accept hard truths about myself, the world, and my world. Being responsible for MYSELF and dealing with addictions. Learning that I stand for the truth and I’m not playing the game the matrix wants me to play. I have to fill my cup first that is the most important for myself, because I’ve learned that people will take you for everything and chew you up and spit you out because they can and because you let them.
Great job explaining Goliath:) My experience was diffintaly through my 30's. I would say I hit my spiritual awareness, death and rebirth say at age 31. Then dived deep into my spiritual journey for a few years. At the top of my spiritual vibrations I got hit the hardest...lol... got matched and married a spiritual partner in India soule off of vibrations if that makes sense. Then had a very hard relationship, no support, narcasim, then 5 miscarriages in one year being told its probably my Karma, a break up same time my close father got stage 4 cancer, suicidal.... all in one year lol. Probably my Saturn time;) We do get through these waves. Thank you for your pure honesty and maturity Goliath! All my love 🙏
Really appreciate this video. I just turned 31 the other day and the past couple years have been pretty full on. I lost my dad, left my longterm parter, lost my job and got ghosted by what I thought was a close friend. Everything definitely made me feel like wouldn’t get through it but I can finally say with a sigh of relief I think the worst of it is over for now. I relate to how you talk about channeling pain into your art. That always seemed to help me process and it’s definitely something I still do. I just keep reassuring myself that everything balances out and I’ve been feeling lighter lately. I can see how these challenges ushered in a rebirth as painful as they were. Grateful to hear your perspective. 💜💜💜
Thank you so much yeah I had a painful shift at 30, and it changed the directio of my whole entire life... Looking back now I see why. All things lead to more things... Its all connected! Thank you for always commenting and coming to my channel, means alot to me x
@@throughtheshadow9013 Sorry to hear that. Sending you love. From my own experience, I know it can feel pretty rough. Hope it gets easier for you soon. 💜
Filled for divorce in April. My Virgo friend told me I was letting myself go. I was upset but it made me take a look at myself. Been a healthy workout master ever since. Ex wife is living out of her car in a hobby lobby parking lot. DV charge. Long story. I started writing pomes again. My writing has improved since this ordeal has happened. I believe the pain has given me “soul”. I do think pain and loss improves art. The more I watch your videos the deeper I go into the world you occupy.
I'm a 2 degree Taurus in Saturn. I'll have to look more into this. What's written in the chart doesn't fit at all. It says that I constantly fear not having enough love, property, and material things and that I tend to be selfish and stingy lol. That's so not me. I know the good and bad about myself and that's not it. I'm still trying to find my purpose in life, though. I don't feel I have much of a purpose if I can't help ppl in some way. That's where I struggle now. I've not been in a position of helping anyone and that's so unfulfilling. My mom always said my purpose was helping animals and I felt that too, but now that I'm older I realize how much I love science and would love to study neutrinos if I could. I never could have guessed that particle physics would turn me on. I can't get out and be as active as I was (Mars in Aries) and I had so much energy. Now my mind is just super active and there's so much I want to learn. Is it wrong to not know what your purpose is? I would think a lot of ppl would struggle with not knowing exactly. Maybe I've already fulfilled it by just being a mom, wife, or friend. When I was young I really thought I'd grow up to be a singer or dancer. I loved ballet and was in classes and baton twirling. I competed in that up until high school when I gave it up like an idiot. I could have been a teacher and had my own studio eventually. I had my hands in so many things except school. I just couldn't concentrate. I'd love to sign up for classes now, but I worry about my fickle health. Most days I can't even get out of bed.
I definitely can relate. I believe I still going through my however I am 29 hours and 30 July 16. My Saturn is in Aquarius and it’s at 29° I know that that is a critical degree and this has been a rough return. However, I have learned so much and gain so much inside and grown and send it as I am still learning, valuable lessons, like boundaries, life, personal fulfillment, enjoyment, karmic lessons, narcissistic abuse, and so much more regarding trauma, and other challenges, that I am proud to say I am a survivor of I been able to do the flexion, and I’ve also been able to reevaluate my decisions, choices, actions, isn’t even perspectives on ego and taking things for what they are instead of what they could be. Having any other lessons that I would take with me as I elevate but yes it was definitely difficult
hello again thank you for another great video. I'm 30 and I just had my saturn return in pisces but oddly enough the past three years were a time of difficult and challenging experience, spiritual growth and transformation. Could it be possible that i had mine earlier? I have been taking accountability and pushing myself to grow and not rely on family even when I was really alone but I'm still struggling in life. I feel like i'm moving towards my purpose although it feels like i'm walking under water slowly
My brain just broke a few minutes in.... in the helpful but fucking intense shocking etc kind of ways... I keep having to pause this... Ive also been fighting off a panic attack and just came here and picked this one trying to distract from it.... and instead its helping to sort of integrate some of the things... And the two analogies i just heard also helped... perfect visuals and hilarious... humor (sometimes) helps derail the panics... because laughter is basically the polar opposite of panic.... It doesnt always work but this just helped lessen it all a bit... ...
* I finally have a good question.. but .. ugh... I have hang ups with asking questions... With your mind and life experience etc you've never had panic attacks or hypomania or "paranoia"* or when synchronicities etc are so frequent / intense etc that is actually stressful to deal with... etc etc.. ?
@TheElGoliathTarotDeck I'll delete all this once you get to see it... im just realizing more helpful things.. always... it never ends... Growing up questions resulted in trauma.. in either direction... if I asked things (to learn because I was curious and interested in everything like most kids naturally are) = it was an opportunity to shame me and put me down and laugh at me.. because that was some of the easiest = best supply possible... other times the questions I asked triggered the explosions.. because apparently all was perceived as threat to that hyper tense hyper fragile npd structure... so.. any and every interaction was like tiptoeing through a mine field... and didn't matter how cautious and literally trained into fawning and obviously broken I was.. those mines would still get triggered... And... there was never ever ever any questions about how I felt or what I might have needed or etc... so I understand that tragic thing with too many of us growing up... The only questions I ever got was interrogation.. more shame.. and most recently from all of them I experienced that deliberate collecting info that could later be used to hurt me.. and was......... so... I feel really uncomfortable asking people questions.... and too worried of ever even chancing making others feel as uncomfortable as I was always made to feel.... That all said... it's why I get fucked up and want to delete everything and disappear... though I'd still be learning just more quietly... I hope that all makes any sense... also wish id thought to put these descriptions with the npd things in case they could help others see those patterns etc.... I'm going to leave this here a little.. just because it was helpful to be able to finally articulate all that... then I can delete it... because it's nothing to do with the subjects here... or it kind of does relate.... but probably only in my experience.... ...
Not sure why my return sucks so much. My mom died and then a week later I'm facing a possible divorce. My mom must have died during her return. Things have been incredibly weird.
Yes just hang tough what will be will be, what must end will end. Stay calm and have faith/ knowing that what is trluy ment for you is ment to be for you. And something that isnt real will not be prolonged and all things will come to light.
@@TheElGoliathTarotDeck I have faith and trust in God right now but I'm really going through hell and its incredibly painful, but within it are divine synchronicities and bigger glimpses through the veil.
I used to feel the same way about needing pain to make art. It started that way for me too. And like you, it was necessary for my healing. Now that I’ve moved on from those struggles and feel mostly bliss, I create from a far deeper and clearer place. It’s very powerful and unfiltered. It’s a very spiritual experience. I consider art “channeling” in a way. It’s an incredible experience. I need to maintain my creative practice to keep the balance though
yes thank you for this comment
Saturn return started extra early for me! i was about 25-26 and it was transiting my sun first. im aquarius sun stellium, 3H, and cap stellium 2H. sag rising and part of my cap stellium is jupiter. i have saturn cnj venus in the 4H of pisces. my themes have been very obvious and in my face. quiting weed, learning to set boundaries from crazy obsessive, scary men, sorta becoming my parents parent after my grandmother passed on when i was 27 in 2023. but that role didnt come till i moved back home after taking care of my grandmothers house for almost a year before my uncle came home and moved in by suprise. he co-owns the house with my mother. i took great care of the home, started to enjoy keeping a beautiful home, but when i moved back into my parents house, they were like hoarders 😭😭 i fell into depression with them for a while, but snapped out of it and started to deep clean, sort, throw things out and take care of the cats. its been like this for a while but theyre coming back to their senses. quitting weed was liberating, as ive been stuck on it for the better half of a decade, and im finally starting to step into selling my art for money. ive always felt so blocked from it, but im coming out of my shell. i was lucky enough to be born with the memory of drawing. but i had never used it to acquire wealth till now. because ive been getting layed off from or quitting every job i had 😂😂 i want to make decent money and take my parents on a beautiful vacation this year. during this transit, i also started fantasizing about moving to nyc. my venus ic line in astrocartography. im in rural nova scotia, my chrion mc line, so its a massive change im excited to attempt. i am also certified to do reiki/energy healing and have a connection to spirit. ive only done it for free when i was in a good place, but once im in a better place, ill start charging for it. im excited for the transit to finally end in 2026, but until then, ill be making sure my parents stay safe and healthy, the best i can
Right now, I’m on my final months of my first Saturn return in my 8th house. My whole life got flipped upside down and I had to accept hard truths about myself, the world, and my world. Being responsible for MYSELF and dealing with addictions. Learning that I stand for the truth and I’m not playing the game the matrix wants me to play. I have to fill my cup first that is the most important for myself, because I’ve learned that people will take you for everything and chew you up and spit you out because they can and because you let them.
I would be interested in hearing your take on Capricorn, “ cold hard truth”. I enjoy your videos and your no BS approach to the signs.
Caps coming up next in the series!
Great job explaining Goliath:)
My experience was diffintaly through my 30's. I would say I hit my spiritual awareness, death and rebirth say at age 31. Then dived deep into my spiritual journey for a few years. At the top of my spiritual vibrations I got hit the hardest...lol... got matched and married a spiritual partner in India soule off of vibrations if that makes sense. Then had a very hard relationship, no support, narcasim, then 5 miscarriages in one year being told its probably my Karma, a break up same time my close father got stage 4 cancer, suicidal.... all in one year lol. Probably my Saturn time;)
We do get through these waves. Thank you for your pure honesty and maturity Goliath!
All my love 🙏
So welcome! Yes I can totally relate to all you have said! Truth is the only way!
Really appreciate this video. I just turned 31 the other day and the past couple years have been pretty full on. I lost my dad, left my longterm parter, lost my job and got ghosted by what I thought was a close friend. Everything definitely made me feel like wouldn’t get through it but I can finally say with a sigh of relief I think the worst of it is over for now. I relate to how you talk about channeling pain into your art. That always seemed to help me process and it’s definitely something I still do. I just keep reassuring myself that everything balances out and I’ve been feeling lighter lately. I can see how these challenges ushered in a rebirth as painful as they were. Grateful to hear your perspective. 💜💜💜
Thank you so much yeah I had a painful shift at 30, and it changed the directio of my whole entire life... Looking back now I see why. All things lead to more things... Its all connected! Thank you for always commenting and coming to my channel, means alot to me x
@@TheElGoliathTarotDeck Of course. 😊 Always happy to connect
Wow im going through all you said you went through. Its insanity.
@@throughtheshadow9013 Sorry to hear that. Sending you love. From my own experience, I know it can feel pretty rough. Hope it gets easier for you soon. 💜
Filled for divorce in April. My Virgo friend told me I was letting myself go. I was upset but it made me take a look at myself. Been a healthy workout master ever since. Ex wife is living out of her car in a hobby lobby parking lot. DV charge. Long story. I started writing pomes again. My writing has improved since this ordeal has happened. I believe the pain has given me “soul”. I do think pain and loss improves art. The more I watch your videos the deeper I go into the world you occupy.
35😮⁵is era errorreasons 4430:5reasons reasons 😮r56e5😅erre4e55😮5😅😅e5 30:53 5e55?5pm e55e5e55erq5w5w😮?
I'm a 2 degree Taurus in Saturn. I'll have to look more into this. What's written in the chart doesn't fit at all. It says that I constantly fear not having enough love, property, and material things and that I tend to be selfish and stingy lol. That's so not me. I know the good and bad about myself and that's not it. I'm still trying to find my purpose in life, though. I don't feel I have much of a purpose if I can't help ppl in some way. That's where I struggle now. I've not been in a position of helping anyone and that's so unfulfilling. My mom always said my purpose was helping animals and I felt that too, but now that I'm older I realize how much I love science and would love to study neutrinos if I could. I never could have guessed that particle physics would turn me on. I can't get out and be as active as I was (Mars in Aries) and I had so much energy. Now my mind is just super active and there's so much I want to learn. Is it wrong to not know what your purpose is? I would think a lot of ppl would struggle with not knowing exactly. Maybe I've already fulfilled it by just being a mom, wife, or friend. When I was young I really thought I'd grow up to be a singer or dancer. I loved ballet and was in classes and baton twirling. I competed in that up until high school when I gave it up like an idiot. I could have been a teacher and had my own studio eventually. I had my hands in so many things except school. I just couldn't concentrate. I'd love to sign up for classes now, but I worry about my fickle health. Most days I can't even get out of bed.
I definitely can relate. I believe I still going through my however I am 29 hours and 30 July 16. My Saturn is in Aquarius and it’s at 29° I know that that is a critical degree and this has been a rough return. However, I have learned so much and gain so much inside and grown and send it as I am still learning, valuable lessons, like boundaries, life, personal fulfillment, enjoyment, karmic lessons, narcissistic abuse, and so much more regarding trauma, and other challenges, that I am proud to say I am a survivor of I been able to do the flexion, and I’ve also been able to reevaluate my decisions, choices, actions, isn’t even perspectives on ego and taking things for what they are instead of what they could be. Having any other lessons that I would take with me as I elevate but yes it was definitely difficult
1000% agree!
Thank you!!! ❤
Recieved
hello again thank you for another great video. I'm 30 and I just had my saturn return in pisces but oddly enough the past three years were a time of difficult and challenging experience, spiritual growth and transformation. Could it be possible that i had mine earlier? I have been taking accountability and pushing myself to grow and not rely on family even when I was really alone but I'm still struggling in life. I feel like i'm moving towards my purpose although it feels like i'm walking under water slowly
Thats when you know that something is happening
Love your videos bro 😎
My brain just broke a few minutes in.... in the helpful but fucking intense shocking etc kind of ways...
I keep having to pause this...
Ive also been fighting off a panic attack and just came here and picked this one trying to distract from it.... and instead its helping to sort of integrate some of the things...
And the two analogies i just heard also helped... perfect visuals and hilarious... humor (sometimes) helps derail the panics... because laughter is basically the polar opposite of panic....
It doesnt always work but this just helped lessen it all a bit...
...
* I finally have a good question.. but .. ugh... I have hang ups with asking questions...
With your mind and life experience etc you've never had panic attacks or hypomania or "paranoia"* or when synchronicities etc are so frequent / intense etc that is actually stressful to deal with... etc etc.. ?
@@helenekate0000 Do you mean me ? Like have I?
@@TheElGoliathTarotDeck lol.. yes you.... the you ive been selfishly ranting at too much because too many interesting things.... ...
@TheElGoliathTarotDeck I'll delete all this once you get to see it... im just realizing more helpful things.. always... it never ends...
Growing up questions resulted in trauma.. in either direction... if I asked things (to learn because I was curious and interested in everything like most kids naturally are) = it was an opportunity to shame me and put me down and laugh at me.. because that was some of the easiest = best supply possible... other times the questions I asked triggered the explosions.. because apparently all was perceived as threat to that hyper tense hyper fragile npd structure... so.. any and every interaction was like tiptoeing through a mine field... and didn't matter how cautious and literally trained into fawning and obviously broken I was.. those mines would still get triggered...
And... there was never ever ever any questions about how I felt or what I might have needed or etc... so I understand that tragic thing with too many of us growing up...
The only questions I ever got was interrogation.. more shame..
and most recently from all of them I experienced that deliberate collecting info that could later be used to hurt me.. and was......... so... I feel really uncomfortable asking people questions.... and too worried of ever even chancing making others feel as uncomfortable as I was always made to feel....
That all said... it's why I get fucked up and want to delete everything and disappear... though I'd still be learning just more quietly...
I hope that all makes any sense... also wish id thought to put these descriptions with the npd things in case they could help others see those patterns etc....
I'm going to leave this here a little.. just because it was helpful to be able to finally articulate all that... then I can delete it... because it's nothing to do with the subjects here... or it kind of does relate.... but probably only in my experience....
...
@@helenekate0000 thank you for your messages
How can we book a reading
I think I am going through this...do you still do readings for I need one
❤❤❤
😉😉
Thank you for the reply fire bunny
I am watching rango
Movie
It's a art day
Time 2 draw
I love Rango especially the start of the film in the car!
Creatures of creativity
Make Art
Not sure why my return sucks so much. My mom died and then a week later I'm facing a possible divorce. My mom must have died during her return. Things have been incredibly weird.
Yes just hang tough what will be will be, what must end will end. Stay calm and have faith/ knowing that what is trluy ment for you is ment to be for you. And something that isnt real will not be prolonged and all things will come to light.
@@TheElGoliathTarotDeck I have faith and trust in God right now but I'm really going through hell and its incredibly painful, but within it are divine synchronicities and bigger glimpses through the veil.
❤
🖤🖤🖤
saturn return is KILLING ME
rip kurt cobain
peace🙏🙏
Loving this! 🪐 ❤❤