Jealousy, insecurity, and envy . I see that the narcissists in my life are suffering. And you’re right, they absolutely refuse to look inward and do the real work of exposing them to the WHY of their miserable lives. Looking forward to the book 📕 🔥
OMG, that just confirmed what I found out about my marriage. I always felt that my COVERT NARCISIST husband ( now ex) was envious of me. I spent 20 years of our marriage asking him if he was envious of me, and the answer was always NO. When we were separated for 5 months. I asked again. He said, " I am not envious, BUT I ADMIRE YOU FOR BEING PRETTY, INTELIGENT, YOU MAKE FRIENDS EASLEY, AND I WISH I WAS LIKE YOU"... When he said that to me immediately asked " HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD ME I AM PRETTY, SMART OR THAT YOU LOVE ME IN 20 YEARS?".... He had no answer for that. But, the truth is he HATED ME, for the good qualities I have and he doesn't. Not acknowledging that to me made me feel invisible, unloved, undesired by him.
Whaoooo. And I always knew that my birthgiver and my surroundings people were jealous of me , I would try to dim me , so they won't be or I would bend , twist , try hard ,for acceptance. . Thank you source for pulling me out of it
@@NehaSharma-777 just realized this too. dimming my light to not be on the bad side of my family.. i developed something called a “Jonah Complex” from it
You hit every single nail right on the head - every one of them. You looked at some things at a different angle than I did, therefore, you definitely educated me more on this stuff. The depth and severity of the sibling and relative hate, jealousy, envy is just unbelievable, unfathomable, and completely off the chain. It just completely blows my mind. You better believe this stuff is EXTREMELY dangerous and toxic. Get these people out of your life quickly and permanently. Give all this stuff to the Lord and he will fight your battles for you. The bible says to "guard your hearts" from people like this. You can't change them, only the Lord can.
The narcissist’s insecurities are the culprit for EVERYTHING that they do. You elaborate on the different branches of it all so well. Always having that “AHA!” moment watching your content.
The reason narcissist hate is because of the demon that is present in them...the darkness can not survive in the light. Lee, truly love you and you are a great help to many just remember as your channel asks for those commenting to be respectful and mindful of their comments, we ask the same of you. You are an intelligent, slendid man no need to ever use GD when getting your point across.❤️
@@emmarae4322 For it is written: We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against rulers of darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 🕊🕯🙏✝️
I didnt want to admit that this entire time she was competing with me, my own best friend. But when i started looking up covert narcissism it hit me. She always thought she was better even when she knew she was not. She started to crack after realizing looks aren’t everything During school and our younger years her attractiveness got her far and enabled some bad behaviour. Now that we are older it was starting to show and the gap was thinning I went the education route and became more aware of myself and my relationships. Got into multiple hobbies, Started dressing in nice clothes and makeup because i could afford to in my new high paying job, Found myself someone who loves me for me while she struggled even to make the worst men/women stay, thats when the abuse started. The sneaky comments, the comparing, the way she commented on my looks and behaviour was her turning me into something she could be comfortable being around and being seem with. Cant keep a job, friends, a lover she never worked hard for anything or anyone in her life and buys the clothes she is always complimented on from child sweat shops because they are cheap but i am the problem because i don’t smile enough in public I may have had some codependent issues that I realized were triggered because she was using narcissistic tactics that I was not used to (because i was only ever around Grandiose narcs) Covert narcs are definitely a lot harder to see and find but im Glad i did when i did Never again no more manipulation for me.
📕 I look forward to reading you and your wife’s book! Thank you for being so open on UA-cam with your disorder. I genuinely am really proud. I loved a narcissist who could sometimes express what he was actually feeling in the ways you do but the switch would flip no matter what I did. Once he actually felt abandoned by me, I never saw that side of him again. Thanks to you and maybe 2 other content creators, I finally was able to realize that my sympathy for him doesn’t justify subjecting myself to emotional and physical abuse. One day I sincerely hope he will fight to heal himself like you are.
These narcissists act as if everyone should put them high on a pedestal. Not authentic at all. Yes , the hate is bad and over time they will be exposed.They make me sick.
Thank you for this video, and all your videos. And thank you for explaining this hatred. My ex boyfriend suddenly switched and became hateful, spiteful, cold and began spreading lies about me and I have never been more confused in my life. I’m going to have to watch this a few more times to let it sink in. Thank you again! God bless
Kudos Lee! You are a really intelligent and self aware person - thanks for educating all of us both people with npd and typical people alike so we can empower and support reach other . 💯🙏
📖 luv you man... and your wife for supporting you. I love the narc man in my life. I want to see him learn and grow but he says he's good being a robot. He says he's searched his mind for past childhood trauma and can't find any but his sister he didn't talk to for 30 years told me they could never know what type of mood their mother would be in because she was drunk daily. She was a stay at home mom who in the end drank herself to death but the sister told me she reacted differently every minute.. every day.. so the man I love just teyed to stay put of her way. He never learned how to cope with emotions in a healthy way. He raised is 4 girls the same way. KEEP YOUR FEELINGS INSIDE AND NEVER TALK ABOUT THEM BECAUSE THIS WOUPD BE UNCOMFORTABLE.. WOW! He casts me away about once a week but I always reach out to him because I want him to know I love him unconditionally and am going nowhere soon. He always accepts my company. It's just easier for him to shut me down then to attempt to talk it through. we have Absolutely nothing to fight about. He just randomly starts attacking me about once a week. I've learned to just say ok regarding most things and only address issues I feel are important. he is important to me... im the only one hes ever met who has stuck beside him. Anyone else he's cast away just accepts it. I told him he's too important to me to just allow him to discard me when I know I can help him. He's doesn't hurt me anymore because I am constantly educating myself. Again... I love ya man......don't know you but feel very proud of you for doing the work. God bless you and your family. 😊
I'm dealing with this right now and have been my whole life from my own father and step mother. I believe my dad is covert and my step mother overt. When I left home quickly to leave my family behind as we're all crazy there. I met my ex husband and I have realised I married my father. My ex husband now uses our children as a tool against me (parental alienation) and in just 4 months I don't even recognise my children. He also mimics my texting habits, tries to communicate like me and uses what I've said to him in the past against me like it's coming from him. He's in constant competition with me and my husband now sees that and thinks it's so weird.
I've been waiting for that special someone to come along. I lived with my roommate for almost a year before I realized he may be the one. We moved away from each other and he came over a few times after that before I realized something wasn't right. I just felt it. To make a long story short he had a rap sheet a mile long 😮 I was floored because the man he portrayed was totally different. It hurt, but he went on the block list. I deleted him totally from my life. So be careful out there. They can be very manipulative and energy draining.
I feel like my partner is a narcissist yet he is always calling me one and telling me I gaslight him. Silent treatment for the 4th time in 3 months. I’m not allowed to give him the silent treatment but every time things don’t go his way I’m being given one. He told me hated me on Father’s Day and ever since then I have been feeling nothing but hatred from him
It all makes sense now...the mound of questions, the lovebombing and the abrupt dumping. I'm still confused...she was the so nice and loving then turned into a totally different (cold) person.
I believe you. He complimented a lot about my clothes, my apartment. How funny I was, how beautiful I was, how my heart is pure and my eyes were pure. I get it. It’s a mental illness. Coverts are the worst becuz you cannot spot them. I really think it’s deep seeded. Yep, yep & yep. It’s all messed up.👈🏻
Hi Lee, while everyone is talking about dumping the narsc as a solution, it's interesting to hear that you are married. As a narsc how does your marriage function?How do you ensure the well-being of your spouse?
They at first are intrigued unless they are targeting you for resources (rebound). Once they gain access to you and see you are a normal person and how “easy or possible” for you to be a doctor or lawyer “meaning you are an average person” it’s makes them feel like “I’m special, I’m smart, why can’t I be like this” . Yes. For some reason people idolize people of education are “supremely smart, better” but not really. They just were consistent and applied themselves, which the narc lacks, which is patience. Going to college for 6+yrs takes responsibility and patience. They are jealous they lack this quality. You can be, pardon me but kinda dumb but be educated and have degrees. They put people that have these qualities on a pedestal and then that image is cracked when they realize you are a “real person”.
"Haye" is a very strong descriptive word. Personally.... GAP, Homer MI...... has his struggles....... However, leaning on crutches is childlike. What's saddning is the intentional "secret " le gene pools maintain silence over. "Family" encourages the path of self-destructuib
And self-awareness…. One has to want to change too actually change. Family has to be strong enough to let one learn…. That does not listen….. Its called growing.
My ex and I broke up at least a 100 times within 1,5 years and each time we broke up (even for 2 days) he made his apartment like mine, or started dressing as I suggested, or I see him behaving like me at a birthday party..I'm 99% sure he was a covert
Are narcissists really so insecure that they go around accusing others of being insecure all the time? I mean are they really this repetitive by saying it all the time? Is it a mind game? I’m beginning to figure out their toxic habits, geez lol 🤦♀️
I have asked my ex so many times why it seems like he dislikes me. He will respond that I’m a good woman a he doesn’t. I feel like he likes my qualities but it’s also whee he falls short.
I remember a long time ago .. we had been married for about a year or so and my husband suddenly said one day , unexpectedly tha he wa JEALOUS of me , not because i was flirting wtih anyone , juis that he was jeaslous fo ME... I know now what he meant.. it still hurts , I want to leave but I cant im afraid he migbt commit suicide and i could not face that.
Oh baby exposing them will make them retaliate in such a way that is dangerous. Mine put me in jail and lied on me. And this is my mother I'm talking about. She's gotten worse as I get older. It's was so bad I almost beat her up because I snapped. She's disgusting, filthy and a poor exscuse of a woman. Then he most sickening part about it is. She manipulated everyone into thinking I was the one doing the bullshit. Ugh so gross.
📚 I really appreciate your Content it helps me understand the Personal HELL I was in I've been BINGE Watching your Content and I particularly Loved the Mask On Mask Off VIEDO that one made a Light go On in my head that the Gas Lighting he would do to me then if someone were to come and see that the issue was he'd Turn into this Other Person ( Mask On ) buttt when they Left ( Mask Off ) That right there helped me Immensely!!!
I think for you to feel comfortable profiting off your experience of having the diagnosis of NPD- you should NOT participate in cyber bullying victims of abuse. Or participate in associated hate campaigns that have organized crime associated with it. Maybe you should in fact be uncooperative with individuals online behaving badly. It’s illegal and can cause vulnerable people to unalive themselves.
She liked who i was then once she was doing better acted like I should change and be different. Then she acted like i was beneath her even though previous acted like I was to good for her
Did you decide to go to therapy on your own accord, or was it something your wife requested? Is it unreasonable to request therapy? Somehow I get the feeling if I request it, it’s not going to have the outcome I desire anyway.
Book emoji hahaha 🫨 Lee I wanted to say congrats on your success helping people! I have listened to 10,000 hrs on utube trying to understand what the f happened to me. I was crucified by 2 narcissist mfers and I had never heard the dam word before, at the same time btw. My sibling and my long time bf. I wanted to die really. I was do angry with my sister and completely humiliated by my bf. Anyway. .. ive listened to dr sam vaknin, Richard grannon, dr carter, dr ramini even joyce Meyers. You always apologize for 5 min i guess people really criticize and ride your ass. Point...u Really do have your own unique point of view and sense of humor, u speak so clearly and i do learn and can laugh. Don't change what u r doing. U def have a calling and I appreciate it, i love your transparency and humility. Good luck and thank you for everything you do. I hope you get rich as f***
Telling them the truth brings on extreme narc rage. How dare we choose not to be gaslit & actually live in reality & speak the truth to their lies 🤷🏾♀️
Some of the Narcs cannot deal with REAL REALITY. When the victim finally awaken? and realize its time to shake out of the Narc's life? This becomes so detrimental and devastating to the Narc that the Narc can't deal with it.
Yes. If you dare to tell the truth to his face you live dangerousely. You become his enemy, and you will sooner or later regret you ever spoke to him at all. Those who stay friends with him forever are those who 1 - keep a good distance and 2 - choose their words carefully and never speak to him or about him without a proper respect and adoration. If you tell him the truth you better run for your life and hope he is not coming after you. Because he will await his moment a strike his blow.
omg never do it alone. I just act dumb and leave quitley so they feel like am an idiot and makes them feel better not bitter because they are dangerous unpredictable like a wild animal. just keep safe at ALL COSTS
If they’re suddenly treating you badly out of nowhere, it means they’re just cheating on you now, if that supply cuts them off, suddenly they’ll be nice again.
@@MentalHealness Lee, video request: What happens when a narcissist meets someone who is just as dishonest/corrupt as them? Maybe not necessarily toxic or problematic, but just a bit shallow and superficial? Will that relationship last? Is there a scenario where a narcissist is actually content with someone? That they feel like they've met someone who is similar to them? (The new partner of my abuser is not a bad person, but seems to be similarly shallow/dishonest when it comes to politics and integrity. I feel like they're a good match and I wonder if he's able to NOT abuse a counterpart if they're not decent enough to challenge them?)
@@Analysis_Paralysis yes, my covert D/A is content with me, because I can behave similar in certain aspects, I set boundaries which he has to respect, if he does not, and he does not all the time, likes to start devaluing me, then I do the same to him and he stops, I am an empath but adopted narcisisst traits to handle him, I want to stay with him , so does he wants to stay with me, I bonded him to me somehow, he traumabonded me, he even loves me, butcthinkhechates me sometimes, but can keep himself controlled, discusses everything, only sometimes is stubborn, but no silent treatment nor ghosting nor stone walling, he is good with me, , greeting from Germany ❤
Just Because I am Me, same God created him created Me…. Truly realized my spouse doesn’t like me to be True to myself ☺️I asked him, so why did he marry me? To get to America cause so as he got in America in One month and receive that green card; the Love bombing affections, concerns, attention and sexual intimacy STOP. I was blind for two years ( him in Gambia Africa) now I see🧐and he doesn’t like me exposing him, not at All and I am Telling it All USCIS/ICE Fraud Marriage. Now I know he hate me☺️
The covert one will stonwall you if you want to discuss the truth. They dig smileys, emojis, and cheap laughter. Dismissing others is where there game is at. Under the influence of alcohol they get more nasty. Even after you were married 25 years to a wonderful person, when the mask is off, it is off. It is very very hard to get over it.
Omg, CATASTROPHIC, for the narc; all of their mental pathways, Neurons, and the roadway in the brain just EXPLODES. Then Their fangs come out, before that happens??? I hope the person is outta there before the Narc Transforms😯
Sounds like a narcissist is emotionally immature. Very moody and hateful. Probably displays childlike behavior. Emotionally, they are probably stunted at childhood. This can be very dangerous. Emotionally childish with adult capabilities. It can be very dangerous.
Narcissist is grown people with a child on the inside they are led by a evil spirit tell them no or have your own opinion they will drain you financially if you allow them sign Cynthia Smith a person must love them self I pray for these toxic people they can't love they don't know what is with them it is all about themselves
@@LarryA-w4j Yeah, I was hit financially myself. Very horrible experience. Maybe it was a good thing. I have been researching so much about mental health. About the person I am having trouble with. I now know what to look for and probably be able to help some others. Yes, narcissists truly do need prayer. Consistent prayer. I believe that everyone will reap what they sow. I don't have to do harm to people that do me wrong. Those people will bring harm to themselves.
1. Not obeying their orders, in a timely manner. 2. Becoming aware of their narcissism and confronting them about it. 3. Refusing to allow them to project their sins onto you. 4. Refusing to give them the resources you formerly gave them. 5. Not stepping away from family, friends, & acquaintances when they tell you to. 6. Objecting to being 100% alone at all times, when they're out screwing everybody. 7.Not abandoning your hobbies and interests when told to. 8. Refusing to agree that they're so, so, so much superior to you. And the list goes on.
The covert narcs hate you on a different type of level. They love you in person and loathe you in private for years without you having a single clue. They literally wait for the perfect moment to destroy your soul and when they do it’s usually in a way that causes pain that you didn’t even think was possible smh
Yes, happy front that you don't know and when you find out they been backstabbing from the get go and laughing with women they have on the side... it's like sleeping with evil... who needs enemies when you have a husband like that...now exhusband.
You can actually catch them staring at you with that narcissistic look of hatred. My Sociopath ex husband would look at me and the kids like that. I would catch him and he would just say that he was thinking about something. He must have been thinking about what he could do to us!! It was actually frightening!!!
1 biggest reason the Narcissist or a Toxic person begins to hate you???? you moved on with your life without them, and you are happy and healed. they are left in the shadows of their anger. They lose control of everything when you push them away for good.
I like that. I dont hate myself. Im learning to love myself. Till they heal and acknowledge there horrible ways I wash my hands of them. It's gonna take a miracle. 🙏✌️
My ex acts nice when he tries to Hoover. When it don’t work he goes back to hatred. I’m trying to get a divorced that he filed but won’t finish. This man emotionally and sexually abused me , I had no self esteem. Yet he calls me crazy 😩. I’m literally dealing with his passive aggression just trying to get divorced papers done . He won’t respond to text for hours. When he finally does I tell him a place to meet up. He says ok then don’t show up. He wants a reaction from me. I don’t give him one. I just want this to be done so I can lose his number.
Narcissism has been around since the beginning of time, as a matter of fact it was way more prevalent back then. Today we know about narcissistic personality disorder so it's not hidden anymore. We talk about narcissism today. Back in the day there was not even a word for an evil gaslighter that hates you and only wants your demise.
Walk away quietly. Move if you can. Block them on socials. Don't give them the chance to contact you again. Be thankful you got away. #scapegoat 👣✌️🆓🕊️
That's the truth! When God made a way for me to escape, I didn't hesitate. I was outta there like a robbery; I made a move like a smooth criminal! Thank God 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Safest thing to do is to keep away from these people. Basically, they hate you for existing. What I noticed is that the ex narc absolutely loved other toxic persons. Funny tho, he desires a good partner but he wont treat you with an ounce of respect. He just wants someone in his corner[relationship wise]that wont do him like he do them.
Anything. Literally anything can make them hate you. Just the fact that you have a moment of fun or freedom pisses them off and makes them want to come for you.
This comment is so true. He tells everybody I insult him. 🤣 but what I actually do is call him out on his abuse and evil. They hate it when you call them out 😆😆😆😆
This explains a lot. I have a lot more education than my ex. This is why he always said I made him feel small. This was not my intention but now I know why he resented me so much anytime I tried to help or suggest something. He used to love my chatty personality, but in the end he said it ANNOYED him.
Thank you for producing these videos. It's an extremely rare narcissist who (1) owns that narcissism; (2) seeks help to overcome it; and (3) reaches out to others, to help educate them about narcissism. Hats off to you, bro.
When a narcissist "hates" you and has a grudge against you, people have no idea the lengths the narcissist will go to perfect their revenge. I'm talking about planning a scheme over YEARS. You'll have moved on from that toxic relationship and, out of nowhere, something terrible happens... that 'something ' could very well be the result of that narcissist from years ago. 🤔 Trust me. I'm speaking from experience.
Deeply true. Things are being revealed to me just recently that someone put a heinous charge against me in false report. I could not help them if I wanted to. Now I learn what they have done is considered a federal breach of records. I thank God Almighty for showing me the horrendous thing and it is going to cost this person dearly according to the authorities involved.
Yep, never be alone anywhere with them. Do not put yourself in any scenarios where they could falsely accuse you of something or become violent. These people will stop at nothing.
knowing that the person I love is in pain or “hates” me because I make them uncomfortable hurts me. 😢 But I left him anyway. In the end I loved me more than I loved him.
It's not personal, they're disordered and how they end up feeling about anyone they get close with. They're full of anger and hate and have to let it out on someone, just don't be their someone!
@@corinahamilton96 I disagree that it’s not personal. He once told a third party that he couldn’t tell me the truth because if I knew it I would leave him. People tried to make excuses for his lies. That he didn’t “know” that he was lying. That the lies were “his truth”. If he could say, I can’t tell her because…. He knew he was lying just like he knew he was hurting me. Every time I’ve been mean to someone I’ve known what I was doing. I was frustrated or stressed or tired and it made me feel better to take it out on someone else. How I felt before being mean doesn’t excuse that I was mean. I chose to act that way. Narcissists know what they are doing and they think that they are so perfect and infallible that they don’t need to change. They’re nice when it serves them to be nice. It hurts terribly to love someone like this. Don’t make excuses for them. They’ve had way too many and that’s why they still are the way they are.
“…can’t be happy.. how DARE you have the ability to enjoy life when they can’t? can’t be sad… it shows them that their behavior ISNT ok and that they should be accountable.
I swear we are living in an epidemic of Narcissism....They are EVERYWHERE....
Yesssss🤦🏽♀️
I just had 2 in a row wtf second one didn't last long
@@narelleme7990, I had 3 in a row....Last one was around only 6 months....They are everywhere....it's like 8/10...
Yes empress... I'm telling you I see them everywhere ... It's mindblowing
It has always existed. We just weren't aware of what it was because a lot of individuals were taught to accept toxicity.
Jealousy, insecurity, and envy . I see that the narcissists in my life are suffering. And you’re right, they absolutely refuse to look inward and do the real work of exposing them to the WHY of their miserable lives. Looking forward to the book 📕 🔥
They run from shame and always will.
They are abused children. They are sure they are not passing it on. Why are they so sure?
They are abused children.
@@dcanes5720 I feel like a celebrity honestly
OMG, that just confirmed what I found out about my marriage. I always felt that my COVERT NARCISIST husband ( now ex) was envious of me. I spent 20 years of our marriage asking him if he was envious of me, and the answer was always NO. When we were separated for 5 months. I asked again. He said, " I am not envious, BUT I ADMIRE YOU FOR BEING PRETTY, INTELIGENT, YOU MAKE FRIENDS EASLEY, AND I WISH I WAS LIKE YOU"... When he said that to me immediately asked " HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD ME I AM PRETTY, SMART OR THAT YOU LOVE ME IN 20 YEARS?".... He had no answer for that. But, the truth is he HATED ME, for the good qualities I have and he doesn't. Not acknowledging that to me made me feel invisible, unloved, undesired by him.
Whaoooo. And I always knew that my birthgiver and my surroundings people were jealous of me , I would try to dim me , so they won't be or I would bend , twist , try hard ,for acceptance. . Thank you source for pulling me out of it
@@NehaSharma-777 just realized this too. dimming my light to not be on the bad side of my family.. i developed something called a “Jonah Complex” from it
my wife is the same way and she just up and left two states over after 26 years. took nothing and we have two kids.
Same with my ex. He said the same thing. Glad to be getting a divorce from him
Dang, how sad that a grown man would be envious of his wife.😂🤣
You hit every single nail right on the head - every one of them. You looked at some things at a different angle than I did, therefore, you definitely educated me more on this stuff. The depth and severity of the sibling and relative hate, jealousy, envy is just unbelievable, unfathomable, and completely off the chain. It just completely blows my mind. You better believe this stuff is EXTREMELY dangerous and toxic. Get these people out of your life quickly and permanently. Give all this stuff to the Lord and he will fight your battles for you. The bible says to "guard your hearts" from people like this. You can't change them, only the Lord can.
The narcissist’s insecurities are the culprit for EVERYTHING that they do. You elaborate on the different branches of it all so well. Always having that “AHA!” moment watching your content.
The reason narcissist hate is because of the demon that is present in them...the darkness can not survive in the light.
Lee, truly love you and you are a great help to many just remember as your channel asks for those commenting to be respectful and mindful of their comments, we ask the same of you.
You are an intelligent, slendid man no need to ever use GD when getting your point across.❤️
100% facts the ex’s mother used to call him the devil well she was not lying after you see them for who they are can’t unsee em they can’t take light
Demons don’t exist. Trauma, abuse and bad childhoods do. Saying it’s demons let’s them off the hook. Grow up,
@@emmarae4322 For it is written: We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against rulers of darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
🕊🕯🙏✝️
Your honesty is my Easter egg
I didnt want to admit that this entire time she was competing with me, my own best friend. But when i started looking up covert narcissism it hit me.
She always thought she was better even when she knew she was not. She started to crack after realizing looks aren’t everything
During school and our younger years her attractiveness got her far and enabled some bad behaviour. Now that we are older it was starting to show and the gap was thinning I went the education route and became more aware of myself and my relationships. Got into multiple hobbies, Started dressing in nice clothes and makeup because i could afford to in my new high paying job, Found myself someone who loves me for me while she struggled even to make the worst men/women stay, thats when the abuse started. The sneaky comments, the comparing, the way she commented on my looks and behaviour was her turning me into something she could be comfortable being around and being seem with.
Cant keep a job, friends, a lover she never worked hard for anything or anyone in her life and buys the clothes she is always complimented on from child sweat shops because they are cheap but i am the problem because i don’t smile enough in public
I may have had some codependent issues that I realized were triggered because she was using narcissistic tactics that I was not used to (because i was only ever around Grandiose narcs)
Covert narcs are definitely a lot harder to see and find but im
Glad i did when i did
Never again no more manipulation for me.
DAMN, You are saying EVERYTHING I have experienced with my mom, siblings and spouse….
stay strong
📕 I look forward to reading you and your wife’s book! Thank you for being so open on UA-cam with your disorder. I genuinely am really proud. I loved a narcissist who could sometimes express what he was actually feeling in the ways you do but the switch would flip no matter what I did. Once he actually felt abandoned by me, I never saw that side of him again. Thanks to you and maybe 2 other content creators, I finally was able to realize that my sympathy for him doesn’t justify subjecting myself to emotional and physical abuse. One day I sincerely hope he will fight to heal himself like you are.
Yep! My mom hates me. I went no contact 2 yrs ago, and oooeee she is not happy about it. I can literally feel her hate from afar. Oh well.
The insights you’ve shared in this session are very helpful. I deeply appreciate your honesty. ❤
Hear you loud and clear 💯💯💯 true story, I lived it..
💯🙏🏽
ABSOLUTELY,
MY SELF CONTROL AND SELF DISCIPLINE, ECT
SMH
YOU NAILED IT 😮😮
These narcissists act as if everyone should put them high on a pedestal. Not authentic at all. Yes , the hate is bad and over time they will be exposed.They make me sick.
Thank you for this video, and all your videos. And thank you for explaining this hatred. My ex boyfriend suddenly switched and became hateful, spiteful, cold and began spreading lies about me and I have never been more confused in my life. I’m going to have to watch this a few more times to let it sink in. Thank you again! God bless
I like it when you ramble! Do it more often, please.
Kudos Lee! You are a really intelligent and self aware person - thanks for educating all of us both people with npd and typical people alike so we can empower and support reach other . 💯🙏
🙏🏽
📖 luv you man... and your wife for supporting you. I love the narc man in my life. I want to see him learn and grow but he says he's good being a robot. He says he's searched his mind for past childhood trauma and can't find any but his sister he didn't talk to for 30 years told me they could never know what type of mood their mother would be in because she was drunk daily. She was a stay at home mom who in the end drank herself to death but the sister told me she reacted differently every minute.. every day.. so the man I love just teyed to stay put of her way. He never learned how to cope with emotions in a healthy way. He raised is 4 girls the same way. KEEP YOUR FEELINGS INSIDE AND NEVER TALK ABOUT THEM BECAUSE THIS WOUPD BE UNCOMFORTABLE.. WOW! He casts me away about once a week but I always reach out to him because I want him to know I love him unconditionally and am going nowhere soon. He always accepts my company. It's just easier for him to shut me down then to attempt to talk it through. we have Absolutely nothing to fight about. He just randomly starts attacking me about once a week. I've learned to just say ok regarding most things and only address issues I feel are important. he is important to me... im the only one hes ever met who has stuck beside him. Anyone else he's cast away just accepts it. I told him he's too important to me to just allow him to discard me when I know I can help him. He's doesn't hurt me anymore because I am constantly educating myself. Again... I love ya man......don't know you but feel very proud of you for doing the work. God bless you and your family. 😊
You answer so many questions. I hate hate that you ARE my favorite self aware narcissist!❤️✌️
I truly do when he gets in those ghosting moods I completely agree 💯💯💯 and give him the space 🚀
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I'm dealing with this right now and have been my whole life from my own father and step mother. I believe my dad is covert and my step mother overt. When I left home quickly to leave my family behind as we're all crazy there. I met my ex husband and I have realised I married my father. My ex husband now uses our children as a tool against me (parental alienation) and in just 4 months I don't even recognise my children. He also mimics my texting habits, tries to communicate like me and uses what I've said to him in the past against me like it's coming from him. He's in constant competition with me and my husband now sees that and thinks it's so weird.
Going back for my masters, made my NARC hate himself, he knows my heart is big but he still cheated with his disgusting mistress.
I've been waiting for that special someone to come along. I lived with my roommate for almost a year before I realized he may be the one. We moved away from each other and he came over a few times after that before I realized something wasn't right. I just felt it. To make a long story short he had a rap sheet a mile long 😮 I was floored because the man he portrayed was totally different.
It hurt, but he went on the block list. I deleted him totally from my life. So be careful out there. They can be very manipulative and energy draining.
I'm glad you healed enough to love and be loved. ❤ Thanks for sharing.
I feel like my partner is a narcissist yet he is always calling me one and telling me I gaslight him. Silent treatment for the 4th time in 3 months. I’m not allowed to give him the silent treatment but every time things don’t go his way I’m being given one. He told me hated me on Father’s Day and ever since then I have been feeling nothing but hatred from him
stay strong n protect your peace
I pray for these wicked acting people .
It all makes sense now...the mound of questions, the lovebombing and the abrupt dumping. I'm still confused...she was the so nice and loving then turned into a totally different (cold) person.
Self-love is the best defense against the narcky one!😂❤🎉
This makes SO much sense!!
In other words narcissist account for all the haters we have in this world!
Just want to tell you, you seem and look like a beautiful person.
Thank You So Much Mr. Lee!
I believe you. He complimented a lot about my clothes, my apartment. How funny I was, how beautiful I was, how my heart is pure and my eyes were pure. I get it. It’s a mental illness. Coverts are the worst becuz you cannot spot them. I really think it’s deep seeded. Yep, yep & yep. It’s all messed up.👈🏻
Thank you for sharing your insight. This was Very informative. 👍
Thanks Lee this is a great video and topic. Definitely answered my question 😊💖🙏.
Why would a narcissist say “I’m afraid of you! Whaaat! Why? What for?
I believe they start to hate you when they can't have their way with you
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Hi Lee, while everyone is talking about dumping the narsc as a solution, it's interesting to hear that you are married. As a narsc how does your marriage function?How do you ensure the well-being of your spouse?
They at first are intrigued unless they are targeting you for resources (rebound). Once they gain access to you and see you are a normal person and how “easy or possible” for you to be a doctor or lawyer “meaning you are an average person” it’s makes them feel like “I’m special, I’m smart, why can’t I be like this” . Yes. For some reason people idolize people of education are “supremely smart, better” but not really. They just were consistent and applied themselves, which the narc lacks, which is patience. Going to college for 6+yrs takes responsibility and patience. They are jealous they lack this quality. You can be, pardon me but kinda dumb but be educated and have degrees. They put people that have these qualities on a pedestal and then that image is cracked when they realize you are a “real person”.
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The spirit of narcissism is running ramped The Lord rebuke it.
"Haye" is a very strong descriptive word.
Personally.... GAP, Homer MI...... has his struggles.......
However, leaning on crutches is childlike.
What's saddning is the intentional "secret " le gene pools maintain silence over.
"Family" encourages the path of self-destructuib
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And self-awareness…. One has to want to change too actually change. Family has to be strong enough to let one learn…. That does not listen….. Its called growing.
📕📘📗📓 Thank you, Lee
I am an Empath and he's a narcissist 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️ he can't stand me after so long
My ex and I broke up at least a 100 times within 1,5 years and each time we broke up (even for 2 days) he made his apartment like mine, or started dressing as I suggested, or I see him behaving like me at a birthday party..I'm 99% sure he was a covert
📖 can't wait for your book to come out!
I received a nice size inheritance from my Mother who passed away and my narcissistic ex fiancé began to hate me because of it
Really sad situation man. May God/Allah give everyone healing Aameen.
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indeed you are my favorite narcissist
He (baby father )made me hate myself and he refuses to move out
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Are narcissists really so insecure that they go around accusing others of being insecure all the time? I mean are they really this repetitive by saying it all the time? Is it a mind game? I’m beginning to figure out their toxic habits, geez lol 🤦♀️
Do you ever address how adult children overcome trauma from the narcissistic father?
I need to see that one!
Damn, this is so sad.
How do i stop obsessing and hating him 😢
Wow this a great insight
Cheers for that
I enjoy your content and appreciate your honesty. man, that was a narcissistic ending...lol
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I have asked my ex so many times why it seems like he dislikes me. He will respond that I’m a good woman a he doesn’t. I feel like he likes my qualities but it’s also whee he falls short.
I remember a long time ago .. we had been married for about a year or so and my husband suddenly said one day , unexpectedly tha he wa JEALOUS of me , not because i was flirting wtih anyone , juis that he was jeaslous fo ME... I know now what he meant.. it still hurts , I want to leave but I cant im afraid he migbt commit suicide and i could not face that.
I am a better person
> 3:13 . 3:17 -3:24 → 3:56
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Oh baby exposing them will make them retaliate in such a way that is dangerous. Mine put me in jail and lied on me. And this is my mother I'm talking about. She's gotten worse as I get older. It's was so bad I almost beat her up because I snapped. She's disgusting, filthy and a poor exscuse of a woman. Then he most sickening part about it is. She manipulated everyone into thinking I was the one doing the bullshit. Ugh so gross.
Its the Jezzebal spirit.
📚 I really appreciate your Content it helps me understand the Personal HELL I was in I've been BINGE Watching your Content and I particularly Loved the Mask On Mask Off VIEDO that one made a Light go On in my head that the Gas Lighting he would do to me then if someone were to come and see that the issue was he'd Turn into this Other Person ( Mask On ) buttt when they Left ( Mask Off ) That right there helped me Immensely!!!
I think for you to feel comfortable profiting off your experience of having the diagnosis of NPD- you should NOT participate in cyber bullying victims of abuse. Or participate in associated hate campaigns that have organized crime associated with it. Maybe you should in fact be uncooperative with individuals online behaving badly. It’s illegal and can cause vulnerable people to unalive themselves.
lol and Easter egg. 😅. It’s called a cameo 😝🤷🏻♀️
How do u make them feel secure and make them not jealous.
they have to find it within themselves
I am dealing with one right now how do I get away?
She liked who i was then once she was doing better acted like I should change and be different. Then she acted like i was beneath her even though previous acted like I was to good for her
Truth
10:10 whow clear
My Narc ex is jealous that I go to the gym😂
Did you decide to go to therapy on your own accord, or was it something your wife requested? Is it unreasonable to request therapy? Somehow I get the feeling if I request it, it’s not going to have the outcome I desire anyway.
my own accord
Book emoji hahaha 🫨 Lee I wanted to say congrats on your success helping people!
I have listened to 10,000 hrs on utube trying to understand what the f happened to me. I was crucified by 2 narcissist mfers and I had never heard the dam word before, at the same time btw. My sibling and my long time bf. I wanted to die really. I was do angry with my sister and completely humiliated by my bf. Anyway. .. ive listened to dr sam vaknin, Richard grannon, dr carter, dr ramini even joyce
Meyers. You always apologize for 5 min i guess people really criticize and ride your ass. Point...u Really do have your own unique point of view and sense of humor, u speak so clearly and i do learn and can laugh. Don't change what u r doing. U def have a calling and I appreciate it, i love your transparency and humility.
Good luck and thank you for everything you do. I hope you get rich as f***
I really appreciate it
Telling them the truth brings on extreme narc rage. How dare we choose not to be gaslit & actually live in reality & speak the truth to their lies 🤷🏾♀️
Facts
Some of the Narcs cannot deal with REAL REALITY. When the victim finally awaken? and realize its time to shake out of the Narc's life? This becomes so detrimental and devastating to the Narc that the Narc can't deal with it.
Facts!
Yes. If you dare to tell the truth to his face you live dangerousely. You become his enemy, and you will sooner or later regret you ever spoke to him at all. Those who stay friends with him forever are those who 1 - keep a good distance and 2 - choose their words carefully and never speak to him or about him without a proper respect and adoration. If you tell him the truth you better run for your life and hope he is not coming after you. Because he will await his moment a strike his blow.
omg never do it alone. I just act dumb and leave quitley so they feel like am an idiot and makes them feel better not bitter because they are dangerous unpredictable like a wild animal. just keep safe at ALL COSTS
If they’re suddenly treating you badly out of nowhere, it means they’re just cheating on you now, if that supply cuts them off, suddenly they’ll be nice again.
Or take it out on you...🤔
This society/government breeds them because it’s narcissistic infested so all 💩 runs down hill.
CORRECT, They always need a pole to lean on, and to use people. Never again will I allow that to happen to me. NOPE
When you question them while they are cheating they get nasty. If they aren't cheating they take a question totally normal
Omg so true
1. Speak the truth and they will hate you like no other.
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Absolute truth!!! 😂😂😂
Lee said, “build yourself up to where they are no longer qualified for you”🔥🔥🔥
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This the one!!!
@@MentalHealness Lee, video request: What happens when a narcissist meets someone who is just as dishonest/corrupt as them? Maybe not necessarily toxic or problematic, but just a bit shallow and superficial? Will that relationship last? Is there a scenario where a narcissist is actually content with someone?
That they feel like they've met someone who is similar to them? (The new partner of my abuser is not a bad person, but seems to be similarly shallow/dishonest when it comes to politics and integrity. I feel like they're a good match and I wonder if he's able to NOT abuse a counterpart if they're not decent enough to challenge them?)
@@MentalHealness They hate you for keeping it real.
@@Analysis_Paralysis yes, my covert D/A is content with me, because I can behave similar in certain aspects, I set boundaries which he has to respect, if he does not, and he does not all the time, likes to start devaluing me, then I do the same to him and he stops, I am an empath but adopted narcisisst traits to handle him, I want to stay with him , so does he wants to stay with me, I bonded him to me somehow, he traumabonded me, he even loves me, butcthinkhechates me sometimes, but can keep himself controlled, discusses everything, only sometimes is stubborn, but no silent treatment nor ghosting nor stone walling, he is good with me, , greeting from Germany ❤
When you confront them with the truth. They hate that.
Whew
Just Because I am Me, same God created him created Me…. Truly realized my spouse doesn’t like me to be True to myself ☺️I asked him, so why did he marry me? To get to America cause so as he got in America in One month and receive that green card; the Love bombing affections, concerns, attention and sexual intimacy STOP. I was blind for two years ( him in Gambia Africa) now I see🧐and he doesn’t like me exposing him, not at All and I am Telling it All USCIS/ICE Fraud Marriage. Now I know he hate me☺️
The covert one will stonwall you if you want to discuss the truth. They dig smileys, emojis, and cheap laughter. Dismissing others is where there game is at. Under the influence of alcohol they get more nasty. Even after you were married 25 years to a wonderful person, when the mask is off, it is off. It is very very hard to get over it.
It's one of our defense systems against insanity.
Omg, CATASTROPHIC, for the narc; all of their mental pathways, Neurons, and the roadway in the brain just EXPLODES. Then Their fangs come out, before that happens??? I hope the person is outta there before the Narc Transforms😯
Sounds like a narcissist is emotionally immature. Very moody and hateful. Probably displays childlike behavior. Emotionally, they are probably stunted at childhood. This can be very dangerous. Emotionally childish with adult capabilities. It can be very dangerous.
Narcissist is grown people with a child on the inside they are led by a evil spirit tell them no or have your own opinion they will drain you financially if you allow them sign Cynthia Smith a person must love them self I pray for these toxic people they can't love they don't know what is with them it is all about themselves
@@LarryA-w4j Yeah, I was hit financially myself. Very horrible experience. Maybe it was a good thing. I have been researching so much about mental health. About the person I am having trouble with. I now know what to look for and probably be able to help some others.
Yes, narcissists truly do need prayer. Consistent prayer. I believe that everyone will reap what they sow. I don't have to do harm to people that do me wrong. Those people will bring harm to themselves.
I have disbursed from him(!!narc*) I'm at peace now he ran me away couldn't deal with him anymore but I am Really at peace thank God❤
Yes, they are very childless he act like a little boy especially in hearing the truth couldn't take it😢😂😢
YES!!!!!!
1. Not obeying their orders, in a timely manner. 2. Becoming aware of their narcissism and confronting them about it. 3. Refusing to allow them to project their sins onto you. 4. Refusing to give them the resources you formerly gave them. 5. Not stepping away from family, friends, & acquaintances when they tell you to. 6. Objecting to being 100% alone at all times, when they're out screwing everybody. 7.Not abandoning your hobbies and interests when told to. 8. Refusing to agree that they're so, so, so much superior to you. And the list goes on.
@@brendaleverick3655 9. Moving on with someone that actually loves you and treats you good.
When you stop kissing their 🍑 because you finally realized and accept who and what they are and have always been.
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That "Hate" can turn to murder! That "Hate" is real! 😮😮😮
The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy!😮😮😮
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They murder the soul 💔
Almost got killed and kids too...these people are killers.
True ..
@@rmcgarra7 Don't ever go back!! Congratulations on leaving 👏 🙌 ✨️ 👌!
The covert narcs hate you on a different type of level. They love you in person and loathe you in private for years without you having a single clue. They literally wait for the perfect moment to destroy your soul and when they do it’s usually in a way that causes pain that you didn’t even think was possible smh
Yes, happy front that you don't know and when you find out they been backstabbing from the get go and laughing with women they have on the side... it's like sleeping with evil... who needs enemies when you have a husband like that...now exhusband.
Totally
Oh shit
You are on point 🙌
...I can be just as Evil, but they are worse, like the real Devil! They're just sad! Stay away from them!
You can actually catch them staring at you with that narcissistic look of hatred. My Sociopath ex husband would look at me and the kids like that. I would catch him and he would just say that he was thinking about something. He must have been thinking about what he could do to us!! It was actually frightening!!!
1 biggest reason the Narcissist or a Toxic person begins to hate you???? you moved on with your life without them, and you are happy and healed. they are left in the shadows of their anger. They lose control of everything when you push them away for good.
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You speak the truth. 👍
I like that. I dont hate myself. Im learning to love myself.
Till they heal and acknowledge there horrible ways I wash my hands of them. It's gonna take a miracle. 🙏✌️
@@mandylf4158 You are on the right path. Make a great life for yourself and be happy. That’s the best revenge against narcissists.
My ex acts nice when he tries to Hoover. When it don’t work he goes back to hatred. I’m trying to get a divorced that he filed but won’t finish. This man emotionally and sexually abused me , I had no self esteem. Yet he calls me crazy 😩. I’m literally dealing with his passive aggression just trying to get divorced papers done . He won’t respond to text for hours. When he finally does I tell him a place to meet up. He says ok then don’t show up. He wants a reaction from me. I don’t give him one. I just want this to be done so I can lose his number.
I agree we are living in an epidemic of narcissism. Yes, they are nothing but inhumane destructive creatures!!!
Narcissism has been around since the beginning of time, as a matter of fact it was way more prevalent back then. Today we know about narcissistic personality disorder so it's not hidden anymore. We talk about narcissism today. Back in the day there was not even a word for an evil gaslighter that hates you and only wants your demise.
This disorder is EXTREMELY underreported and therefore EXTREMELY under-diagnosed.
Epidemic, indeed.
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Walk away quietly. Move if you can. Block them on socials. Don't give them the chance to contact you again. Be thankful you got away. #scapegoat 👣✌️🆓🕊️
Yes so true
Absolutely 💯
100% true.
That's the truth! When God made a way for me to escape, I didn't hesitate. I was outta there like a robbery; I made a move like a smooth criminal! Thank God 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
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The narcissist hates me because I SEE THEM.
Tell a narcissist their weakness and how to improve they will only hear you attacking them…
Safest thing to do is to keep away from these people. Basically, they hate you for existing. What I noticed is that the ex narc absolutely loved other toxic persons. Funny tho, he desires a good partner but he wont treat you with an ounce of respect. He just wants someone in his corner[relationship wise]that wont do him like he do them.
Interesting 😮
Woww seen that
My private duty client just wants a whipping post.
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THISSSSSSSSS
Rejecting a narcissist can cause them to hate you and loss of control. You said it before, and it doesn't take much for a narcissist to hate you.
Yes, loss of control
They must WIN. So that means we MUST lose, our lives if necessary
Anything. Literally anything can make them hate you. Just the fact that you have a moment of fun or freedom pisses them off and makes them want to come for you.
📖📚 I’m looking forward to it.
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the rose colored glasses don’t last forever.
When you check them and try to hold them accountable all the time. When you point out there obvious lack of just being capable of being a good person
Narcissist never take accountability. I don’t expect them too. . Just leave them in the rear view mirror
This comment is so true. He tells everybody I insult him. 🤣 but what I actually do is call him out on his abuse and evil. They hate it when you call them out 😆😆😆😆
This explains a lot. I have a lot more education than my ex. This is why he always said I made him feel small. This was not my intention but now I know why he resented me so much anytime I tried to help or suggest something. He used to love my chatty personality, but in the end he said it ANNOYED him.
Thank you for producing these videos. It's an extremely rare narcissist who (1) owns that narcissism; (2) seeks help to overcome it; and (3) reaches out to others, to help educate them about narcissism. Hats off to you, bro.
Absolutely
I too approve this message 👌🏽 Thank you Sir God Bless you for doing the Necessary work this is sooo Needed and Necessary 🙏🏽
Bro the fact that you acknowledge your shortcomings shows a lot! Thanks for the knowledge
When a narcissist "hates" you and has a grudge against you, people have no idea the lengths the narcissist will go to perfect their revenge. I'm talking about planning a scheme over YEARS. You'll have moved on from that toxic relationship and, out of nowhere, something terrible happens... that 'something ' could very well be the result of that narcissist from years ago. 🤔 Trust me. I'm speaking from experience.
Deeply true. Things are being revealed to me just recently that someone put a heinous charge against me in false report. I could not help them if I wanted to.
Now I learn what they have done is considered a federal breach of records.
I thank God Almighty for showing me the horrendous thing and it is going to cost this person dearly according to the authorities involved.
Yep, never be alone anywhere with them. Do not put yourself in any scenarios where they could falsely accuse you of something or become violent. These people will stop at nothing.
They can't stand someone being honest and upright and NOT getting on their little toddler mind level.
knowing that the person I love is in pain or “hates” me because I make them uncomfortable hurts me. 😢
But I left him anyway. In the end I loved me more than I loved him.
Sad ain’t it that we have to I guess to teach us strength so sad I’m sorry
You must always love yourself more never put up with shit again
Best way to be. Hopefully more get out and realise we come first. I got out after 3 months :)
It's not personal, they're disordered and how they end up feeling about anyone they get close with. They're full of anger and hate and have to let it out on someone, just don't be their someone!
@@corinahamilton96 I disagree that it’s not personal. He once told a third party that he couldn’t tell me the truth because if I knew it I would leave him.
People tried to make excuses for his lies. That he didn’t “know” that he was lying. That the lies were “his truth”. If he could say, I can’t tell her because…. He knew he was lying just like he knew he was hurting me.
Every time I’ve been mean to someone I’ve known what I was doing. I was frustrated or stressed or tired and it made me feel better to take it out on someone else. How I felt before being mean doesn’t excuse that I was mean. I chose to act that way.
Narcissists know what they are doing and they think that they are so perfect and infallible that they don’t need to change.
They’re nice when it serves them to be nice.
It hurts terribly to love someone like this. Don’t make excuses for them. They’ve had way too many and that’s why they still are the way they are.
I swear when you leave one stay away. It’s too much egg shell walking . You can’t be happy or sad shoot sick . 🙏🏽 everyone
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“…can’t be happy.. how DARE you have the ability to enjoy life when they can’t? can’t be sad… it shows them that their behavior ISNT ok and that they should be accountable.