Please note, if you do not tell your children they are beautiful, someone else will! and sometimes it is coming from the wrong person. So you give your children that validation so they will not be moved by or go seeking it from other people, and possibly find themselves in abusive codependent relationships.
Please note that if you do not teach your children to not concern themselves w the wrong things..... stupidity is not the result of being deprived a superficial compliment 💯
True! I care more about the opinion of my parents who I respect and love than a stranger that means nothing to me! A parent has so much controle about how a child thinks of herself or himself. I always tell our child she is smart and beautiful and teach her to be confident. Other poeple can be nice but there will be situations where they can be hars and in those situations the child needs to be already confident in herself or himself so someone else can’t tear him of her down. That the foundation parents should build for and with the child
Idk why but growing up with my sisters and just having my dad raise us, we never got compliments or acclimated for doing good unless we basically asked for it. " look dad I got an A" . So anytime he said I love you it didnt feel genuine. Now th hat I have a son and another on the way, I love my kids so damn hard!!!! Our favorite things are each other hugs and were best friends. Hes only 3 but he will never think he is unloved
I understand where Jeannie comes from because I have African parents. I see how beautiful her personality is so it makes sense. However, in psychology, there is something called uconditional positive regard. We need our parents to validate our beauty.
Unconditional positive regard has nothing to do with this scenario. She's her mother, not a therapist. The danger here is she may feel insecure and seek validation from other women. She does seem to get it from others but her mom is being too extreme. If you bring something like unconditional positive regard into parenting you'll end up with a kid with no boundaries, no conscience and who will do whatever they want as there are no consequences. They'll feel entitled. The concept works for assessing persons in therapy and building the therapeutic alliance but with a kid you have to teach right from wrong you don't want to do that 🤷🏽♀️
Yes I do too. However, alot of the Asian culture spends alot of time trying to look white and change the beautiful aspects of themselves (their eyes and skin) and I think if they felt beautiful, it would happen less. You can be gorgeous, giving, and have a 4.0....I know first hand. Love my parents and family for that!!
Connie as an African as well, I agree because for some reason African mothers are too hard on their daughters. We need that validation, and when we don’t get it we learn slower how to just decide to look to ourselves for validation.
These days kids are being bullied about their looks in preschool . They need to know their character comes first but also that they are cute or pretty -whatever it is.
luxaholic anonymous yes!!!!unfortunately parents think it’s cute when kids do that. I always thought that was too young for them to start but kids are so advanced these days they have such a large vocabulary for some babies.
T Tae - I specifically remember that from K-4th grade everyone still played together. Grade 5 was when everyone started forming cliques and that was when bullying started.
Loni: "I didn't know the cookie was loaded" Tam: "OOOHHHH A WEED COOKIE".. LMAO Tam was THAT friend in school! haha this girl chat had me cracking up!!
this mother isn’t doing enough. she should tell her daughter that she is beautiful and smart, like Loni said. if she doesn’t tell her daughter she’s beautiful, the daughter might think that she isn’t good enough for her mom, it might bring on insecurities. beauty isn’t a bad thing, it’s something to celebrate but it isn’t the only thing that’s important. tell her she’s intelligent and beautiful and that her intelligence is beautiful.
LiliBear 2153 Why exactly is beauty something to celebrate? 🤔 And what about those who aren’t beautiful?? Would the lie be healthy for their social development? And why might a child think they are not good enough for their Mom even when being praised on more meaningful attributes? 🤔
kayla. naomi so it’s not a misconception given the topic is about complementing a child’s physical appearance.. obviously a child isn’t going to interpret that statement any other way unless restated or further discussed, Foh. And more importantly, who in tf are you to determine who is appropriate for parenting. That’s a deeply personal remark you should reconsider your place to say bc that would’ve gotten you fucked up in person love.
tashboog lmaoo ok luv, id love to see me being touched. and u genuinely believe that ur mindset of “what about those who aren’t beautiful “ is gonna work in the real world. Even when talking about physical beauty, DIFFERENT PEOPLE FIND DIFFERENT PEOPLE BEAUTIFUL OR ATTRACTIVE. who tf are u to say who is and isn’t beautiful? anywho NEXT CALLER
kayla. naomi and Id be more than happy to oblige love, drop ya location and come get this issue finger thug... I’ll wait. Hmm so I’m an honest soul w 20/20 vision and therefore more than capable of discerning attractiveness from unattractiveness. That TRUTH is a fragment of the real world you’re clearly tapped out of.. case in point; go search the endless catalog on this very platform of people griping about who isn’t included in respective, overarching beauty standards. It’s a thing smart 🙄 ....*anyhoo NEXT MISTAKENLY CONCEIVED, I got you on the regretfully produced waste of flesh 💯
African parents can be so negative sometimes . If you get a new spot they’ll point it out , if you gained weight they point it out , if they don’t like something you’re wearing they’ll point it out . They have too much to say about everything 🙄🙄
@Hans I don't think i would call it being negative. I believe your parents are the people who can be completely honest with you on everything, telling you where you need to improve or pat you on the back because friends usually say only what makes you happy. In life you always need people who tell you the not-so-good feedback!
Lol African parents are similar to Asians!😂😂 I grew thick skin. I'm used to it and it doesn't bother me, but I'll definitely be telling my kids they're beautiful, smart, and more.
It’s ignorant to pretend like looks don’t matter in this world - especially if you are a woman. It’s not fair, but that’s life. Everyone should tell their daughters they are beautiful, if you instill self confidence into them from a young age, they are more likely to be self assured teens and adults, and most importantly not look to men for validation!!!!
B B would you be surprised to find that the most classically “beautiful” women tend to have the lowest esteem? Because when you focus on looks- it becomes about looks. Instead of building confidence you build insecurity. You can tell your child they’re beautiful all day but they can’t compete with surgically enhanced IG models- you’ll tell them their preety and the world will show them a different version. I’m not against complimenting children on their looks- I think it should be the compliment least used. Compliment kids and build their confidence on intangible things no one can destroy. Build your kids complimenting their intelligence, wit, character... etc and supplement it occasionally with their outward beauty.
Joy It doesn’t have to be the least used but children are ALWAYS complimented on the smallest things, beauty included, and that’s the way it needs to be. “Oh you’re so pretty!” “Oh you’re so handsome!” “Oh you’re so smart!” “You’re such a big girl!” “What a big boy!” “You’re so talented!” “You’re funny” Children hear this a hundred times a day and when it comes to addressing young girls, people tend to over think because of societal expectations and it’s unnecessary. As a mother, Going out of your way to refuse telling your daughter she’s beautiful is one of the most tragic and insane sociological experiments I have ever heard and quite frankly, it’s tacky. People are so desperate to be considered socially evolved or “woke” that they’re more socially digressed than anything.
Ignorant or a refusal to assimilate? Looks aren’t essential at all, society simply created that illusion and it is actually brave to live in your own reality and think for yourself.
Jeanie is just so positive about everything, i love the way she attentively listens and supports the other ladies opinions even when they're really different to hers 🥺💕
I understand what jeanie is saying but my mom once said at a friends wedding where I was a bridesmaid for some reason (african mom) : "to me, you are the most beautiful person here." i was 15y. Now I'm 28y and she past away in 2009. I'm forever holding on to that comment. Those words blessed my soul. Till today I'm throwing this in my sisters face without any context. Sisters: Me: okey but mom said I was the most beautiful person there. 😂😂😂
I’ve never heard my mother compliment me or comfort me with words ever 🤷🏽♀️ im 37 and even after i survived emotionally abusive marriage ppl can still easily manipulate me with compliments coz i was starved for compliments when i was a little girl.... compliment your daughters ppl they need to hear it from you before they hear it from the wrong ppl and fall into abuse
When my child was younger and people called her pretty I would also remark and you are so smart, you have a wonderful heart or any other character strength she had. I didn't want her concentrating on her outward appearance. The reason is because beauty fades and is a personal perspective. Character, personality, and intelligence is constant.
Thanks because I thought it was clever of her to call her child other things that are positive not physical you say "hey my smart girl" "look how kind you are" children want affirmation so choose what you will do some cultures are just different
Sadly, these are the same exact girls who grow up and feel insecure about their appearance and jealous of other females they think are beautiful. I see it all the time. I was told that I was beautiful all the time by both of my parents and I never feel jealous of women and when I look at myself in the mirror I am extremely happy with what I see and I am not insecure at all. Parents need to tell their girls they are beautiful in addition to everything else. I am glad my parents did this because I see a big difference in myself and other women who parents never did this.
Jessi M. Except these are superficial points of concern which is the only part that is genuinely sad. There is a different underlying issue when a girl/young lady/woman feels insecure or jealous based on her physicality as opposed to any point of actual merit. On the contrary, my insecurity stemmed from the overwhelming attention I got for my physical appearance throughout my youth. I only cared bc of the constant affirmation and eventually obsessed over something I not only wasn’t in control of but that genuinely doesn’t matter apart from the fog society creates over the subject. My intellect allowed me to discover on my own the power system and lie of “beauty” as it relates to physical appearance. I had to unlearn that lie and love what sets me apart, that mf unmatched intellect which kept me just a few paces more conscious than my peers who were constantly worried about the wrong things. I could go on.. but my point is that we have to stop subjecting our personal experiences onto the truths of human psychology. The same thing you feel built your confidence is the same thing that dismantled mine so your theory about the difference b/t you and others seems to achieve a confirmation bias.. when it is quite possible that the bigger picture is the overarching obsession for beauty in the west among other places. Consider this; if society didn’t constantly reward beauty, then would the concern be innate? Is beauty always the premise of desire? What about those inherently excluded from the subject altogether (those born with physical afflictions, deformities, and such..) notice how people often leave them out of the conversation and don’t comment on how they look out of “politeness.” I wonder whether those of you imparting this dimwitted assertion of what people *should tell their daughters ever even consider any of these facts. No need to react, just something for you to think about..
@@tashboog There are people with a high level of intellect that they are born with. There are people with athletic abilities that most of us could not achieve no matter how hard we tried because of genetics. There are people with incredible musical talents that they were gifted with at a young age. I could go on forever but I will stop there. Physical appearance is the same as this. Some people are born aesthetically pleasing to look upon. It doesn't mean that they are better than anyone else. Just like the genius, the incredible athlete, and the brilliant musician is not better than anyone. Why call your children smart if there will always be a person who is smarter and they might obsesses about being the smartest and it may cause depression and worry????? It is the same exact reasoning that people like you have for not calling their daughters' beautiful but no one cares because it is not about "beauty." The truth is when you say you do not want to call your child beautiful, you are putting being beautiful on a pedestal and making it better than other qualities. You are indirectly saying that beauty is worth more and more valuable. Truth is there are beautiful people, intelligent people, artistic people, athletic people, etc. If you are conventionally attractive, you can be a model. If you are naturally good in math, you can be a mathematician. If you have crazy athletic abilities, you can try for the olympics. We are all different. Not everyone has to beautiful just like not everyone has to be muscular, or brilliant musician, or the smartest person in the room .
My mom never called me beautiful or told me she loved me...BUT I know that she loves and cares about me.. I'm fortunate to have had a dad that always told me he loved me and called me his beautiful prince🤗🤗 nonetheless sometimes you don't need anyone to tell you those things...you should know you are!
I wish my mom said it more often to me when I was younger. But a lot of Caribbean’s never grew up being affectionate. But I had a healthy childhood and I knew I was very loved.
As someone who grew up with a mother who refused to acknowledge my beauty, I can attest to the fact that it creates an unhealthy dynamic and impacts the child’s self-confidence in a negative way. Strangers, relatives, even my moms friends would always comment on how beautiful they thought I was from the time I was a baby and eventually it seemed like my mom resented me for it. By the time I was a teenager she would get visibly angry and agitated when people would comment on my appearance or give me a compliment. When I was nine she started telling people not to complement me because I already had a “big head“. I didn’t. I was a nine-year-old little girl. I am going to tell my children they’re beautiful every day and that I love them every day because I grew up without hearing either. I’m a very strong person so I gave myself lots of love but I do believe it is one of the reasons why I was vulnerable to predatory broken men in their 20s when I was a teenager. Because of that I was in an abusive relationship from the age of 18 to 20. Complete waste of my time and looking back on it, if I felt my support from my family I would’ve never been vulnerable enough to be victimized by this terrible person.
I come from an Nigerian family, the other day my mom said "hey beautiful" and i looked at her like 😯 and she was like "why are u looking at me like that" and i told her "you NEVER called me beautiful" She has been trying 2 say it more now but everytime she says it, i still look at her like 😮
I have never been that type of woman who needed acknowledgement of being beautiful, I always knew that I was beautiful on the inside and out and in the mind because when I look at my mom that’s where I get every attributes from, from the beauty, to the smarts, to the wisdom, to the knowledge, to the strength etc. I owe it all to her, I’m a part of mother.
My mom never really said that i was beautiful when i was growing up. So when others said it i never really believed them and when guys say it i feel uncomfortable cause im not use to it. I wished my mom did, cause it would have prepared me more. but i use to also focus on other things like getting my education and doing well etc. Cause that was what she focused on. When my mom says it now i have no feeling about it cause for my self i don't feel it. My dad has passed away almost 8 years now and what i can remember is that he was always very proud to show me and my sister of to other people. 😊
Side note : I also think it’s important for the father of the family to say something or even compliment the child because as nice as it is for your mama to compliment you all day everyday there’s still a gap
I pray that every child in this world gets spoiled with LOVE and kind words from their parents. I tell my son everyday he is strong, helpful, kind, amazing, smart, loving beautiful list goes on and I will never ever stop that.
I just want people to stop making excuses for narcissistic parental abuse..I agree with what Loni said.. say what you want, but there is nothing wrong with words of affirmation to provide a healthy balance and appropriate validation to your child.. I think there is still some healing that needs to happen on Jeannie's end, as she tries to downplay the trauma to save face.. If your mom can say another child is beautiful, she can also give her child the same treatment, if not more..
The Dove then perhaps you should articulate those layers bc it only clearly reads ridiculously.. you expressed no logical premise to label anyone’s differing needs as denial of trauma, please. Some of y’all dead ass just need to get over yourselves 🙄
@@tashboog Well I see you're not done.. Clearly you need to do research on the topic because there are others who see the same thing and because it triggers you, maybe you may want to explore why? Perhaps, you may have had a similar experience or you yourself treat others in that way and so it triggered you by my highlighting that it is a sign of a parent portraying narcissistic abuse.. Furthermore, it's not about a "compliment" which you tried to minimize the intent of her lack of nuturing, it is clear she has some "mommy dearest" issues and doesn't want to give her child the appropriate assurance needed for healthy child development.. If you don't see that fine, but for those that have eyes to see they know.. Keep it moving and go back to being done.. And I am alive am well.. be healed
I was bullied about my looks and called ugly. It really got under my skin. My mother called me beautiful 🤩. Part of me didn’t believe her but I always thought of it like she is telling me “be beautiful inside and the outside will be beautiful “ and hearing that from my mom made me feel good about myself.
🗣🗣🗣I wonder if this Mom is a SINGLE MOTHER!!! Where is the father and what are his thoughts on this!! Parents should call their daughters beautiful!!! As a parent if you’re not going to INSTILL confidence in your child; then WHO IS!!!
Working with and studying Early Education; children are gendered with "social stigma". I.e. girls are so "beautiful/pretty" and boys are "strong/brave". Therefore, sometimes girls' characters are not "formed" as such. Me personally, I call children Precious... They ALL are!
I grew up in asian culture as well and they never compliment looks like EVER. it’s hard, but its now to the point it feels weird to ever recieve a compliment from my parents. But I know it’ll make me value other aspects of myself, but the hard way i guess❤️
My mother never told me I was pretty or smart or for that matter beautiful. So when the wrong narcissist man came around telling me I was pretty I was stood with him. In a abusive relationship for many years because I thought I couldn’t do better. Now I have three smart and handsome boys and I tell them every single day they are smart, handsome and perfect just the way they are. I don’t ever want them to go through what I went through. ♥️
my mom never called me beautiful and i never noticed it growing up so it didn’t affect me. she nurtured me in many other ways and taught me amazing things. i don’t resent her for it. i am beautiful among many other things.
I have taught the little girl I babysit that she is smart, she is strong, she is kind and she is beautiful and that what makes people ugly is being mean and hurting people's hearts.
I feel the mother in questions intentions and sentiments have been so misconstrued. She doesn’t not believe her daughter is beautiful- she just doesn’t want her to seek validation for it for the rest of her life. This woman is under fire for inspiring her daughter to be creative, smart, kind, etc. I stand by this woman and try to have a similar approach with my daughter. Instead of offering an outward compliment of “you are beautiful/pretty”, I love to compliment her personal style, because it speaks to who she is and how she expresses herself. Not using the term “beautiful” or similar words doesn’t mean a mother is tearing her daughter down, it means she’s helping her find the beauty within. We’d all be so lucky as to have someone in our life to remind us of our inner fires and strengths, because we may not always see them ourselves.
I grew up having a mother who had and still has severe Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I have never heard my mother call me beautiful, I'm so proud of you etc. She was severely abusive to me as a child and adolescent physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. She calls me names and is in constant competition with me and tries to sabotage any form of happiness in my life. I have no idea what a mother's love feels like. I have taken the last couple years to heal and work through my childhood trauma and re-parent my inner child in order to have a healthy relationship with myself and others.
I pray for your healing Sis.. know what that is like and I empathize with you.. I started following Quora, and this topic of Narcissistic parents/ Narcissistic mother's and the effect they have on their children even into adulthood is discussed by many.. Know that you are worthy and beautiful no matter how much she wanted you to feel otherwise.. (psalms 27:10) Shalom
When I called my niece beautiful, her mother said Don't call her beautiful, she said she wants her daughter to be called smart, intelligent, and worthy... which I agree, which she is all of these things...
My mum always downplays compliments that others give me on my looks and it hurts my feelings. I don’t know why she does this when she should be happy for me 😔
Isn’t this what they call “mom-shaming?” I mean, I know we can have a difference in opinion but like Jeannie pointed out, sometimes there’s a cultural difference that isn’t easily understood by others and yet it works.
I agree to an extant. I can understand not wanting her to grow up vain. Self absorbed. Arrogant. Thinking she's all that. There's a very thin line between feeling good about yourself, have pride and respect for yourself or being arrogant, stuck up, etc. She can say yes, you are beautiful, but the beauty that comes from within is more important. Spend less time and effort working on your wardrobe and make-up and spent more time working on your character and your outter beauty will shine forth because its roots are your inner beauty.
Ok so I think it goes back to the topic we were talking about yesterday which is whether you’d want to be called beautiful or sexy... I think when it comes to make your child feel whole instead of making them feel they’re beautiful on the outside... how are they beautiful inside... cuz a pretty face is just that... pretty but when u have a lot more to work with than just looks... that’s when u have helped , loved , shaped and molded your child to become a very harmonious and interesting human being who values more than just their face value
When I was younger I remember everytime my mom used to get done doing my hair or I would get dressed in something I liked I would go up to the mirror and say “I’m cuteeee!” And my mom would be like “Simmer down” or “Chill out” or something of that nature.... and it would really hurt my feelings. I always wondered why I couldn’t look at myself and love myself without her kinda crushing my spirit... I mentioned it being older and she said “Well it wasn’t to tear you down or make you feel ugly I just didn’t want you to be conceited or big headed...” and I never agreed or came to terms with that because it made me insecure in many ways. And her reasoning wasn’t like this mother’s, she just wants her daughter to see more than her beauty... but it’s all wrong. I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant with my first born daughter and I will make sure that she gets told she’s beautiful at every turn. If you don’t love yourself reaching your full potential is very hard! A lot of scarred and scorned women don’t realize the trauma and insecurities they place upon their daughters... it’s sad.
Each to their own, I tell me daughter she's beautiful because when I look at her that's what I see, especially when she smiles. She is also very smart (to me).
My mom compliments my beauty at the end. She mentions my integrity, my smarts, my whatever and then says I'm beautiful at the end to tie it all together.
it is very important for parents, especially mother's to teach their daughter's self love. A million people could call a daughter beautiful but it means the most when a mother compliments you because you know that its coming from the person who loves you the most
My dad told me I was smart and beautiful the most. My mom said it sometimes but not as encouraging as my dad did. Thank God for my pops. I miss him everyday.
you can encourage your child's self-esteem and help them to find strength and confidence in who they are regardless of appearance, and validate their physical beauty at the same time. at the end of the day, they will receive compliments and validation on their achievements and their appearance from others, but none of it is gonna matter if they don't receive that validation from the people whose opinion they value most. children want nothing more than to please their parents. in the eyes of young children, their parents are the standard of perfection. to them, you can do no wrong. children strive to please their parents. they rely on verbal validation and reassurance that they are making their parents proud and that they love them. without it, they can easily develop terrible self-destructive behavior later in life. not to mention the effects it could have on their mental health and self-worth. that being said I think how Jeannie's mom taught her how to view beauty and how she showed her she is beautiful is absolutely amazing. mama mai is an amazing and intelligent woman. much respect to her
Same Genie. My mom raised me the same. "Why you spend so much time getting ready if your classes are slipping" or "why is your room a mess yet you have makeup on"
I understand what Jeannie is saying my mother said nice things about me but she never said I was beautiful, so when I was out in public I didn't know how to take it when people not related to me would say "you are beautiful or pretty. And I used to wonder why my mother didn't say it as I got older. But it did make me more aware of other attributes I had. I feel I was balanced.
True. Us Asian, it’s very rare our parents would say we are beautiful. Even if they knew we were beautiful, they don’t voice it out loud due to anyone ends up hearing and making us think highly of ourselves. It’s better to be humble than to gloat about ourselves.
Yes to the American Eagle jeans Jeannie was talking about! I bought a pair around 6 months ago and have bought varies pairs of jeans from other companies since then and yet the American Eagle pair is still my go to.
You should hear “you’re beautiful,” from home!! That way no one can tell you differently when you go outside! This is especially if you hear it from the wrong source!
My child will know that’s she’s beautiful inside and out. Yup, she’s going to here it everyday. I thinks it’s very important especially for young black girls and children of color in general. I grew up with complex’s due to the mind set of ignorant people, therefore I will make sure my child knows she beautiful, smart, important and all the above!
Please note, if you do not tell your children they are beautiful, someone else will! and sometimes it is coming from the wrong person. So you give your children that validation so they will not be moved by or go seeking it from other people, and possibly find themselves in abusive codependent relationships.
I wish I could like this comment 70 billion times over! These parents need to know!
I agree. I never heard I was beautiful except once in my life that I can vividly remember. I started talking to an older guy online as a result.
Agreed!
So true
Please note that if you do not teach your children to not concern themselves w the wrong things..... stupidity is not the result of being deprived a superficial compliment 💯
Some mother’s are jealous of their own daughters.💯💯💯
Yep.
Most are i think or most can't connect with their daughters as much as with their sons/bond.
MF DOOM
That doesn’t make sense!!
A mother should be able to connect to her daughter more than her son because her and her daughter are both Women!!
@@ms.beautiful I mean you can look it up their is studies on it.
@@ms.beautiful www.theguardian.com/society/2010/oct/06/most-mums-favour-sons-survey
The mom is in the wrong. Kids don’t care about what strangers say, kids care more about what their parents think about them.
Gaby Cerpa
Some of them definitely care wut strangers say
Thats funny because as a kid I never believed my parents I believe strangers 😂 lmao now I don’t believe anyone
True! I care more about the opinion of my parents who I respect and love than a stranger that means nothing to me! A parent has so much controle about how a child thinks of herself or himself. I always tell our child she is smart and beautiful and teach her to be confident. Other poeple can be nice but there will be situations where they can be hars and in those situations the child needs to be already confident in herself or himself so someone else can’t tear him of her down. That the foundation parents should build for and with the child
"I didn't know the cookie was loaded"
"A weed cookie"
"We're trying to talk in code"
I am dead LMAO
Iconic moment. HAHAHAHA
Lol Loni seems to be lying to us 😄😄
Compliment your kids man. Show them all the love. They need it the most. They will grow up into broken/ loving adults depending on their upbringing.
Idk why but growing up with my sisters and just having my dad raise us, we never got compliments or acclimated for doing good unless we basically asked for it. " look dad I got an A" . So anytime he said I love you it didnt feel genuine.
Now th hat I have a son and another on the way, I love my kids so damn hard!!!! Our favorite things are each other hugs and were best friends. Hes only 3 but he will never think he is unloved
alanah robinson this was so precious to read!! The last part! Keep being the great mom that you are
I understand where Jeannie comes from because I have African parents. I see how beautiful her personality is so it makes sense. However, in psychology, there is something called uconditional positive regard. We need our parents to validate our beauty.
Unconditional positive regard has nothing to do with this scenario. She's her mother, not a therapist. The danger here is she may feel insecure and seek validation from other women. She does seem to get it from others but her mom is being too extreme. If you bring something like unconditional positive regard into parenting you'll end up with a kid with no boundaries, no conscience and who will do whatever they want as there are no consequences. They'll feel entitled. The concept works for assessing persons in therapy and building the therapeutic alliance but with a kid you have to teach right from wrong you don't want to do that 🤷🏽♀️
Me to
Yes I do too. However, alot of the Asian culture spends alot of time trying to look white and change the beautiful aspects of themselves (their eyes and skin) and I think if they felt beautiful, it would happen less. You can be gorgeous, giving, and have a 4.0....I know first hand. Love my parents and family for that!!
I love the four of them
Connie as an African as well, I agree because for some reason African mothers are too hard on their daughters. We need that validation, and when we don’t get it we learn slower how to just decide to look to ourselves for validation.
Never get tired of Jeannie’s impression of her mom 🤣
These days kids are being bullied about their looks in preschool . They need to know their character comes first but also that they are cute or pretty -whatever it is.
Yes!
T Tae - in preschool really???????
luxaholic anonymous yes!!!!unfortunately parents think it’s cute when kids do that. I always thought that was too young for them to start but kids are so advanced these days they have such a large vocabulary for some babies.
T Tae - I specifically remember that from K-4th grade everyone still played together. Grade 5 was when everyone started forming cliques and that was when bullying started.
luxaholic anonymous every school is different , I just hope people are at least getting love at home
I love that Loni validated her own experience while also not invalidating Jeannie’s. ❤️❤️ @5:34 This show has come a long way.
Elle Plow Plow yes, because they be judging jeani sometimes. Tamera didn’t even have to mention Jeani mom calls her beautiful.
Loni: "I didn't know the cookie was loaded"
Tam: "OOOHHHH A WEED COOKIE".. LMAO Tam was THAT friend in school! haha this girl chat had me cracking up!!
Yes....like Loni said LEARN THE CODE lmbo
I feel Tam. I am her in so many ways, and yes, i was also That friend😂😂
this mother isn’t doing enough. she should tell her daughter that she is beautiful and smart, like Loni said. if she doesn’t tell her daughter she’s beautiful, the daughter might think that she isn’t good enough for her mom, it might bring on insecurities. beauty isn’t a bad thing, it’s something to celebrate but it isn’t the only thing that’s important. tell her she’s intelligent and beautiful and that her intelligence is beautiful.
LiliBear 2153 Why exactly is beauty something to celebrate? 🤔 And what about those who aren’t beautiful?? Would the lie be healthy for their social development? And why might a child think they are not good enough for their Mom even when being praised on more meaningful attributes? 🤔
tashboog as Tamara said, beauty is more than just looks and if u have that misconception u shouldn’t be having kids
kayla. naomi so it’s not a misconception given the topic is about complementing a child’s physical appearance.. obviously a child isn’t going to interpret that statement any other way unless restated or further discussed, Foh. And more importantly, who in tf are you to determine who is appropriate for parenting. That’s a deeply personal remark you should reconsider your place to say bc that would’ve gotten you fucked up in person love.
tashboog lmaoo ok luv, id love to see me being touched. and u genuinely believe that ur mindset of “what about those who aren’t beautiful “ is gonna work in the real world. Even when talking about physical beauty, DIFFERENT PEOPLE FIND DIFFERENT PEOPLE BEAUTIFUL OR ATTRACTIVE. who tf are u to say who is and isn’t beautiful? anywho NEXT CALLER
kayla. naomi and Id be more than happy to oblige love, drop ya location and come get this issue finger thug... I’ll wait.
Hmm so I’m an honest soul w 20/20 vision and therefore more than capable of discerning attractiveness from unattractiveness. That TRUTH is a fragment of the real world you’re clearly tapped out of.. case in point; go search the endless catalog on this very platform of people griping about who isn’t included in respective, overarching beauty standards. It’s a thing smart 🙄
....*anyhoo NEXT MISTAKENLY CONCEIVED, I got you on the regretfully produced waste of flesh 💯
African parents can be so negative sometimes . If you get a new spot they’ll point it out , if you gained weight they point it out , if they don’t like something you’re wearing they’ll point it out . They have too much to say about everything 🙄🙄
Indian parents as well.
Nicaraguan mothers too 😩
@Hans I don't think i would call it being negative. I believe your parents are the people who can be completely honest with you on everything, telling you where you need to improve or pat you on the back because friends usually say only what makes you happy. In life you always need people who tell you the not-so-good feedback!
Lol African parents are similar to Asians!😂😂
I grew thick skin. I'm used to it and it doesn't bother me, but I'll definitely be telling my kids they're beautiful, smart, and more.
my mom is Mexican and that is my life 😂
I think it okay when parents call their daughter beautiful, coz they give them confidence and encourage them no matter what they look like
I get what the mother is saying honestly, buy that could hurt the child.
It’s ignorant to pretend like looks don’t matter in this world - especially if you are a woman. It’s not fair, but that’s life. Everyone should tell their daughters they are beautiful, if you instill self confidence into them from a young age, they are more likely to be self assured teens and adults, and most importantly not look to men for validation!!!!
B B would you be surprised to find that the most classically “beautiful” women tend to have the lowest esteem? Because when you focus on looks- it becomes about looks. Instead of building confidence you build insecurity. You can tell your child they’re beautiful all day but they can’t compete with surgically enhanced IG models- you’ll tell them their preety and the world will show them a different version.
I’m not against complimenting children on their looks- I think it should be the compliment least used.
Compliment kids and build their confidence on intangible things no one can destroy. Build your kids complimenting their intelligence, wit, character... etc and supplement it occasionally with their outward beauty.
Facts!!
"not to look to men for validation" 💯
Totally agree with you on that.
Joy
It doesn’t have to be the least used but children are ALWAYS complimented on the smallest things, beauty included, and that’s the way it needs to be.
“Oh you’re so pretty!”
“Oh you’re so handsome!”
“Oh you’re so smart!”
“You’re such a big girl!”
“What a big boy!”
“You’re so talented!”
“You’re funny”
Children hear this a hundred times a day and when it comes to addressing young girls, people tend to over think because of societal expectations and it’s unnecessary.
As a mother, Going out of your way to refuse telling your daughter she’s beautiful is one of the most tragic and insane sociological experiments I have ever heard and quite frankly, it’s tacky. People are so desperate to be considered socially evolved or “woke” that they’re more socially digressed than anything.
Ignorant or a refusal to assimilate? Looks aren’t essential at all, society simply created that illusion and it is actually brave to live in your own reality and think for yourself.
I'm pretty sure jeannie wished her mom called her beautiful.
Nah
Nah
Nope.. i can relate to her..im asian..i don't care to be called beautiful from my mom 😂
AJL same! I’m Polynesian and my mom has never called me pretty or beautiful and part of me never wants her too. That’d be too weird😂
Eriss R. Yeah because you totally don’t sound like one 💀 go somewhere
Jeanie is just so positive about everything, i love the way she attentively listens and supports the other ladies opinions even when they're really different to hers 🥺💕
People always call kids cute or beautiful whether it’s a boy or girl.... this mom doing too much🤦🏾♀️
VV Wow it’s like the whole segment went over ya head 😐
I understand what jeanie is saying but my mom once said at a friends wedding where I was a bridesmaid for some reason (african mom) : "to me, you are the most beautiful person here." i was 15y. Now I'm 28y and she past away in 2009. I'm forever holding on to that comment. Those words blessed my soul. Till today I'm throwing this in my sisters face without any context.
Sisters:
Me: okey but mom said I was the most beautiful person there. 😂😂😂
That's beautiful am waiting my mom to say to these day she use to when I was young but now am 23 en nothing
Stay safe everyone. Everything is gonna be ok.
🙏🙏🙏🙏
Thanks love🙏🏼💯❤️
America isn’t gonna be ok
MB damn 🙄 they were just trying to spread positivity in the midst of a horrible time. relax.
❤❤
That handsanitizer joke hits different these days💀😂
What did she mean about the hand sanitizer? I didnt get the joke 😂😭
what did she mean with that?? like using it as lube?
I’ve never heard my mother compliment me or comfort me with words ever 🤷🏽♀️ im 37 and even after i survived emotionally abusive marriage ppl can still easily manipulate me with compliments coz i was starved for compliments when i was a little girl.... compliment your daughters ppl they need to hear it from you before they hear it from the wrong ppl and fall into abuse
Summer Flower facts
Hope your doing okay
gigiakagorgeous _ I’m good thanks for your concern x
When my child was younger and people called her pretty I would also remark and you are so smart, you have a wonderful heart or any other character strength she had. I didn't want her concentrating on her outward appearance. The reason is because beauty fades and is a personal perspective. Character, personality, and intelligence is constant.
Shawn Dyer Say it again tho 🤦🏾♀️
Thanks because I thought it was clever of her to call her child other things that are positive not physical you say "hey my smart girl" "look how kind you are" children want affirmation so choose what you will do some cultures are just different
Sadly, these are the same exact girls who grow up and feel insecure about their appearance and jealous of other females they think are beautiful. I see it all the time. I was told that I was beautiful all the time by both of my parents and I never feel jealous of women and when I look at myself in the mirror I am extremely happy with what I see and I am not insecure at all. Parents need to tell their girls they are beautiful in addition to everything else. I am glad my parents did this because I see a big difference in myself and other women who parents never did this.
Jessi M. Except these are superficial points of concern which is the only part that is genuinely sad. There is a different underlying issue when a girl/young lady/woman feels insecure or jealous based on her physicality as opposed to any point of actual merit. On the contrary, my insecurity stemmed from the overwhelming attention I got for my physical appearance throughout my youth. I only cared bc of the constant affirmation and eventually obsessed over something I not only wasn’t in control of but that genuinely doesn’t matter apart from the fog society creates over the subject. My intellect allowed me to discover on my own the power system and lie of “beauty” as it relates to physical appearance. I had to unlearn that lie and love what sets me apart, that mf unmatched intellect which kept me just a few paces more conscious than my peers who were constantly worried about the wrong things. I could go on.. but my point is that we have to stop subjecting our personal experiences onto the truths of human psychology. The same thing you feel built your confidence is the same thing that dismantled mine so your theory about the difference b/t you and others seems to achieve a confirmation bias.. when it is quite possible that the bigger picture is the overarching obsession for beauty in the west among other places. Consider this; if society didn’t constantly reward beauty, then would the concern be innate? Is beauty always the premise of desire? What about those inherently excluded from the subject altogether (those born with physical afflictions, deformities, and such..) notice how people often leave them out of the conversation and don’t comment on how they look out of “politeness.” I wonder whether those of you imparting this dimwitted assertion of what people *should tell their daughters ever even consider any of these facts. No need to react, just something for you to think about..
@@tashboog There are people with a high level of intellect that they are born with. There are people with athletic abilities that most of us could not achieve no matter how hard we tried because of genetics. There are people with incredible musical talents that they were gifted with at a young age. I could go on forever but I will stop there. Physical appearance is the same as this. Some people are born aesthetically pleasing to look upon. It doesn't mean that they are better than anyone else. Just like the genius, the incredible athlete, and the brilliant musician is not better than anyone. Why call your children smart if there will always be a person who is smarter and they might obsesses about being the smartest and it may cause depression and worry????? It is the same exact reasoning that people like you have for not calling their daughters' beautiful but no one cares because it is not about "beauty." The truth is when you say you do not want to call your child beautiful, you are putting being beautiful on a pedestal and making it better than other qualities. You are indirectly saying that beauty is worth more and more valuable. Truth is there are beautiful people, intelligent people, artistic people, athletic people, etc. If you are conventionally attractive, you can be a model. If you are naturally good in math, you can be a mathematician. If you have crazy athletic abilities, you can try for the olympics. We are all different. Not everyone has to beautiful just like not everyone has to be muscular, or brilliant musician, or the smartest person in the room
.
I died when Jeanie said "Did they invent hand sanitizer then" and when Tamara said "ohhhhhhh a weed cookie"
If I don't tell my daughter that she is beautiful and amazing, she will go outside to a stranger to hear that she is beautiful.
“A weed cookie” 😂😂 “was hand sanitizer invented then?” 😂😂😂 This girl chat highlights the reason I love this show.
what did she mean with the hand sanitizer joke?
That is going to mess her up. My mom never told me I was beautiful or she never said I love you. Trust me it’s going to mess with head.
My mom never called me beautiful or told me she loved me...BUT I know that she loves and cares about me.. I'm fortunate to have had a dad that always told me he loved me and called me his beautiful prince🤗🤗 nonetheless sometimes you don't need anyone to tell you those things...you should know you are!
I wish my mom said it more often to me when I was younger. But a lot of Caribbean’s never grew up being affectionate. But I had a healthy childhood and I knew I was very loved.
Jamaican have such a hard time showing love and affection, all they do is criticize 🙄
Glen CoCo if u have low self esteem and self gate don’t u think u should be more sensitive to urself ? And maybe tough love just isn’t the answer
As someone who grew up with a mother who refused to acknowledge my beauty, I can attest to the fact that it creates an unhealthy dynamic and impacts the child’s self-confidence in a negative way. Strangers, relatives, even my moms friends would always comment on how beautiful they thought I was from the time I was a baby and eventually it seemed like my mom resented me for it. By the time I was a teenager she would get visibly angry and agitated when people would comment on my appearance or give me a compliment. When I was nine she started telling people not to complement me because I already had a “big head“. I didn’t. I was a nine-year-old little girl. I am going to tell my children they’re beautiful every day and that I love them every day because I grew up without hearing either. I’m a very strong person so I gave myself lots of love but I do believe it is one of the reasons why I was vulnerable to predatory broken men in their 20s when I was a teenager. Because of that I was in an abusive relationship from the age of 18 to 20. Complete waste of my time and looking back on it, if I felt my support from my family I would’ve never been vulnerable enough to be victimized by this terrible person.
Tamera innocence is soooo funny “it was the weed cookie”
Adrienne is irreplaceable on this show. Shes so real, and great at connecting to the audience :)
I come from an Nigerian family, the other day my mom said "hey beautiful" and i looked at her like 😯 and she was like "why are u looking at me like that" and i told her "you NEVER called me beautiful"
She has been trying 2 say it more now but everytime she says it, i still look at her like 😮
Lol I had a similar experience my mum sent me a text saying I love you n I was like 🧐 what is thissssss???
My Nigerian mum hugged me when I graduated college and it was the strangest thing ever!!!!
I have never been that type of woman who needed acknowledgement of being beautiful, I always knew that I was beautiful on the inside and out and in the mind because when I look at my mom that’s where I get every attributes from, from the beauty, to the smarts, to the wisdom, to the knowledge, to the strength etc. I owe it all to her, I’m a part of mother.
Liezl V I love your comment!!
My mom never really said that i was beautiful when i was growing up. So when others said it i never really believed them and when guys say it i feel uncomfortable cause im not use to it. I wished my mom did, cause it would have prepared me more. but i use to also focus on other things like getting my education and doing well etc. Cause that was what she focused on. When my mom says it now i have no feeling about it cause for my self i don't feel it. My dad has passed away almost 8 years now and what i can remember is that he was always very proud to show me and my sister of to other people. 😊
Side note : I also think it’s important for the father of the family to say something or even compliment the child because as nice as it is for your mama to compliment you all day everyday there’s still a gap
There’s no way I would do anything in a porter potty I mean I barely want to go in there to begin with....
Valentíno Quiñones no gIory hoIe?
I love that they kept telling tamera to talk in code! 😂
My momma is the same as Loni’s in the sense of callin her children smart, kind, beautiful, & important lol. I appreciate my momma for that tbh.
You can still find character in your accomplishments as well as being pretty like ???
That mom really thought she was doing something...
I pray that every child in this world gets spoiled with LOVE and kind words from their parents. I tell my son everyday he is strong, helpful, kind, amazing, smart, loving beautiful list goes on and I will never ever stop that.
I'm asian and my mum is my no. 1 fan.
The way we speak to our children become their inner voice so SPEAK WORDS OF LOVE & POSITIVITY.
xxx
I just want people to stop making excuses for narcissistic parental abuse..I agree with what Loni said.. say what you want, but there is nothing wrong with words of affirmation to provide a healthy balance and appropriate validation to your child.. I think there is still some healing that needs to happen on Jeannie's end, as she tries to downplay the trauma to save face.. If your mom can say another child is beautiful, she can also give her child the same treatment, if not more..
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
The Dove lmao so leaving the compliment out is now narcissistic parental abuse? I’m done ..
@@tashboog Be done, clearly it's deeper than just a "compliment" I wouldn't have made this comment otherwise..
The Dove then perhaps you should articulate those layers bc it only clearly reads ridiculously.. you expressed no logical premise to label anyone’s differing needs as denial of trauma, please. Some of y’all dead ass just need to get over yourselves 🙄
@@tashboog Well I see you're not done.. Clearly you need to do research on the topic because there are others who see the same thing and because it triggers you, maybe you may want to explore why? Perhaps, you may have had a similar experience or you yourself treat others in that way and so it triggered you by my highlighting that it is a sign of a parent portraying narcissistic abuse.. Furthermore, it's not about a "compliment" which you tried to minimize the intent of her lack of nuturing, it is clear she has some "mommy dearest" issues and doesn't want to give her child the appropriate assurance needed for healthy child development.. If you don't see that fine, but for those that have eyes to see they know.. Keep it moving and go back to being done.. And I am alive am well.. be healed
Children need positive affirmation 💜 Loni’s mama had it right 👏🏽🙌🏽. Let’s speak life into the next generation.
I was bullied about my looks and called ugly. It really got under my skin. My mother called me beautiful 🤩. Part of me didn’t believe her but I always thought of it like she is telling me “be beautiful inside and the outside will be beautiful “ and hearing that from my mom made me feel good about myself.
I dont believe Loni's story of doing it in the Port-o-Potty..
🗣🗣🗣I wonder if this Mom is a SINGLE MOTHER!!!
Where is the father and what are his thoughts on this!!
Parents should call their daughters beautiful!!!
As a parent if you’re not going to INSTILL confidence in your child; then WHO IS!!!
They were all on a trip this segment especially Tamera. LOL! Love it though!!!!!
Working with and studying Early Education; children are gendered with "social stigma". I.e. girls are so "beautiful/pretty" and boys are "strong/brave". Therefore, sometimes girls' characters are not "formed" as such. Me personally, I call children Precious... They ALL are!
I grew up in asian culture as well and they never compliment looks like EVER. it’s hard, but its now to the point it feels weird to ever recieve a compliment from my parents. But I know it’ll make me value other aspects of myself, but the hard way i guess❤️
I’m weak she said “ weed cookie” and not an “edible” 😂😂 oh tam bless her soul
My mother never told me I was pretty or smart or for that matter beautiful. So when the wrong narcissist man came around telling me I was pretty I was stood with him. In a abusive relationship for many years because I thought I couldn’t do better. Now I have three smart and handsome boys and I tell them every single day they are smart, handsome and perfect just the way they are. I don’t ever want them to go through what I went through. ♥️
my mom never called me beautiful and i never noticed it growing up so it didn’t affect me. she nurtured me in many other ways and taught me amazing things. i don’t resent her for it. i am beautiful among many other things.
"A Weed cookie"😂😂😂😂Tamera kills me!
“BUT THE GAG IS!” Keke Palmer reference
I love this episode. "I was young ok" Loni I love your talking ha
I have taught the little girl I babysit that she is smart, she is strong, she is kind and she is beautiful and that what makes people ugly is being mean and hurting people's hearts.
Awww I love how loni looks at tamera everytime she talks about her kids cause shes auntie Loni💕💕
I looooooooove these ladies soooo much!!!! 😂😂❤️❤️ They crack me up!😆
THIS ALWAYS HAS ME DYING!!☠️☠️”……a weed cookie…”🤣🤣I love it💖
Call your child, your loved ones and strangers beautiful! But beautiful can be many things so point that out 💜
I feel the mother in questions intentions and sentiments have been so misconstrued. She doesn’t not believe her daughter is beautiful- she just doesn’t want her to seek validation for it for the rest of her life. This woman is under fire for inspiring her daughter to be creative, smart, kind, etc. I stand by this woman and try to have a similar approach with my daughter. Instead of offering an outward compliment of “you are beautiful/pretty”, I love to compliment her personal style, because it speaks to who she is and how she expresses herself. Not using the term “beautiful” or similar words doesn’t mean a mother is tearing her daughter down, it means she’s helping her find the beauty within. We’d all be so lucky as to have someone in our life to remind us of our inner fires and strengths, because we may not always see them ourselves.
My mom always tries to use me for her own advantage and i always catch her just staring me down.. I call her mother dearest
IMO if a mother has problems complimenting their daughters a majority of the time it is because they are jealous.
You are all beautiful. I have watched the show over the years and you all have grown so much. Kudo's , to you all for showing such love to each other.
My mom had no choice but to call me beautiful, I'm her spitting image. Lol
I grew up having a mother who had and still has severe Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I have never heard my mother call me beautiful, I'm so proud of you etc. She was severely abusive to me as a child and adolescent physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. She calls me names and is in constant competition with me and tries to sabotage any form of happiness in my life. I have no idea what a mother's love feels like. I have taken the last couple years to heal and work through my childhood trauma and re-parent my inner child in order to have a healthy relationship with myself and others.
I pray for your healing Sis.. know what that is like and I empathize with you.. I started following Quora, and this topic of Narcissistic parents/ Narcissistic mother's and the effect they have on their children even into adulthood is discussed by many.. Know that you are worthy and beautiful no matter how much she wanted you to feel otherwise.. (psalms 27:10) Shalom
Same here,my mom acts like an Angel with others but in the house it’s a different ball game
Ahh a weed cookie 😂😂😂
Tamera, Loni and Jennies rxn all took me down
When I called my niece beautiful, her mother said Don't call her beautiful, she said she wants her daughter to be called smart, intelligent, and worthy... which I agree, which she is all of these things...
My mum always downplays compliments that others give me on my looks and it hurts my feelings. I don’t know why she does this when she should be happy for me 😔
The fact that the daughter looks exactly like her.
Isn’t this what they call “mom-shaming?” I mean, I know we can have a difference in opinion but like Jeannie pointed out, sometimes there’s a cultural difference that isn’t easily understood by others and yet it works.
I agree to an extant. I can understand not wanting her to grow up vain. Self absorbed. Arrogant. Thinking she's all that. There's a very thin line between feeling good about yourself, have pride and respect for yourself or being arrogant, stuck up, etc. She can say yes, you are beautiful, but the beauty that comes from within is more important. Spend less time and effort working on your wardrobe and make-up and spent more time working on your character and your outter beauty will shine forth because its roots are your inner beauty.
Ok so I think it goes back to the topic we were talking about yesterday which is whether you’d want to be called beautiful or sexy... I think when it comes to make your child feel whole instead of making them feel they’re beautiful on the outside... how are they beautiful inside... cuz a pretty face is just that... pretty but when u have a lot more to work with than just looks... that’s when u have helped , loved , shaped and molded your child to become a very harmonious and interesting human being who values more than just their face value
When I was younger I remember everytime my mom used to get done doing my hair or I would get dressed in something I liked I would go up to the mirror and say “I’m cuteeee!” And my mom would be like “Simmer down” or “Chill out” or something of that nature.... and it would really hurt my feelings. I always wondered why I couldn’t look at myself and love myself without her kinda crushing my spirit... I mentioned it being older and she said “Well it wasn’t to tear you down or make you feel ugly I just didn’t want you to be conceited or big headed...” and I never agreed or came to terms with that because it made me insecure in many ways. And her reasoning wasn’t like this mother’s, she just wants her daughter to see more than her beauty... but it’s all wrong. I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant with my first born daughter and I will make sure that she gets told she’s beautiful at every turn. If you don’t love yourself reaching your full potential is very hard! A lot of scarred and scorned women don’t realize the trauma and insecurities they place upon their daughters... it’s sad.
Legit snort laughing at the weed cookie 😂
Each to their own, I tell me daughter she's beautiful because when I look at her that's what I see, especially when she smiles. She is also very smart (to me).
My mom compliments my beauty at the end. She mentions my integrity, my smarts, my whatever and then says I'm beautiful at the end to tie it all together.
it is very important for parents, especially mother's to teach their daughter's self love. A million people could call a daughter beautiful but it means the most when a mother compliments you because you know that its coming from the person who loves you the most
Aahhhh Loni!!! I love you!!! "What's the next topic" 👏🏽😆👏🏽😆👏🏽🤣👏🏽🤣👏🏽🤣😍🥰😘😘😘
Um I feel like everyone calls kids cute or comments on physical regards ... its a child they cant hardly move or talk yet what do you expect?
Jeannie is beautiful inside and out I know that she wish her mom would have said that more but I like that Jeannie is confident.
We love episodes filmed before Amanda
Jadaa Chantel 🙌👏🙌👏
She's not that bad. People always coming for her, let her live sheesh.
Oh My goodness they had me cracking up when they were roasting tamera on the weed cookie comment 😂😂 too funny
" I was young " Loni hahaha
My dad told me I was smart and beautiful the most. My mom said it sometimes but not as encouraging as my dad did. Thank God for my pops. I miss him everyday.
you can encourage your child's self-esteem and help them to find strength and confidence in who they are regardless of appearance, and validate their physical beauty at the same time. at the end of the day, they will receive compliments and validation on their achievements and their appearance from others, but none of it is gonna matter if they don't receive that validation from the people whose opinion they value most. children want nothing more than to please their parents. in the eyes of young children, their parents are the standard of perfection. to them, you can do no wrong. children strive to please their parents. they rely on verbal validation and reassurance that they are making their parents proud and that they love them. without it, they can easily develop terrible self-destructive behavior later in life. not to mention the effects it could have on their mental health and self-worth. that being said I think how Jeannie's mom taught her how to view beauty and how she showed her she is beautiful is absolutely amazing. mama mai is an amazing and intelligent woman. much respect to her
Whenever Loni was like “Cheetah Girls was 40 years ago” makes me feel old af cause I was 8,11,13 when they came out
"ahh a weed cookie "😂😂
Jeannie saying she doesn’t care that much about looks but makes a living off of the fashion industry. She cared.
Same Genie. My mom raised me the same. "Why you spend so much time getting ready if your classes are slipping" or "why is your room a mess yet you have makeup on"
Adrienne is not a germaphobe because she doesn't even wash her hands. 😔 just nasty
I understand what Jeannie is saying my mother said nice things about me but she never said I was beautiful, so when I was out in public I didn't know how to take it when people not related to me would say "you are beautiful or pretty. And I used to wonder why my mother didn't say it as I got older. But it did make me more aware of other attributes I had. I feel I was balanced.
True. Us Asian, it’s very rare our parents would say we are beautiful. Even if they knew we were beautiful, they don’t voice it out loud due to anyone ends up hearing and making us think highly of ourselves. It’s better to be humble than to gloat about ourselves.
Yes to the American Eagle jeans Jeannie was talking about! I bought a pair around 6 months ago and have bought varies pairs of jeans from other companies since then and yet the American Eagle pair is still my go to.
You should hear “you’re beautiful,” from home!! That way no one can tell you differently when you go outside! This is especially if you hear it from the wrong source!
Parenting must be super hard and nobody tells you how to do it. Please keep in mind almost every parent just wants the best for their kids.
My child will know that’s she’s beautiful inside and out. Yup, she’s going to here it everyday. I thinks it’s very important especially for young black girls and children of color in general. I grew up with complex’s due to the mind set of ignorant people, therefore I will make sure my child knows she beautiful, smart, important and all the above!
Yes! American Eagle jeans are expensive (for me personally) but last forever! I have 3 pairs that have lasted me 5 years and they still look new!