I agree. I also think that people who sleep and get with people who have been with a relative or friend of theirs is disgusting. Those are the whores and sluts I shame.
When i was living with aunt and uncle, I got in trouble for throwing away my menstrual pads away in the bathroom trash. They were rolled, wrapped in an excessive amount of toilet paper and then wrapped back in their wrapper (because those are water proof). My uncle saw then in my bathroom trash, when he ran in from outside because it was the closest bathroom to the front door. Apparently he was uncomfortable seeing it in MY bathroom trash can.
Honestly this is something I would have to nip in the bude. He wouldn't get any sex unless he educated himself. His attitude would be bad for any daughter he had. And it would rub off on the sons.
My mother was OBSESSIVE about looking like a perfect family. She stayed in a horrible cheating marriage for years because of it. She’s so much better now but yes it’s a real thing
Not the parents trying to gaslight OP into being responsible for their other child’s mental health. Boomers and their lack of respect for boundaries is willlldd
in regards to the first story: OP has no obligation to rekindle a relationship with his family but i highly encourage him to go to therapy to try and let that rage go, for his own sake.
My sister and I cut our Mother off after years of abuse. She took advantage of soo many second chances and then proved herself to be a very dangerous and awful human with no consideration for her (adult) children. Some of our family still pressure us (mostly my sister) to make up and forgive her. Luckily, our Grandma is supportive and doesn't try to push for the "let's all be a family and get along" narrative. Grandmas are the GOAT for real.
He doesn’t have anything to apologize for though. Why would his parents ask him to apologize? Like??? The one time he has lasting consequences for his behavior he has a mental breakdown? NTA.
It was fake too. He tried swallowing a bunch of pills with the father in the house ready to 'stop' him? This is like when the ex threatens to kill themselves if you leave them. It's manipulation. And look he gets to have all the sympathy and family support while OP is the "bad guy".
The wedding picture story is so funny to me because a close relative of mine got married and had some family pictures done at a professional photo studio. Years later that relative got divorced and their mother opted to draw over the ex with a sharpie instead of getting rid of the nice picture
AITA For telling my wife I hate her job - I think the other thing not being mentioned is how many kids do they have, and how much time did she have to take away from her job to care for each infant? Now she has an opportunity to take a step up in her career, after probably not pursuing those opportunities for the needs of her family, or perhaps waiting for them to get to school age so she could. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, so factoring in the TOTAL average output of each individual over the course of their marriage so far, might help him to get some perspective. The other crappy thing is, is that women are told they can have it all, and with the crazy cost of living, are kindof forced to juggle both. She's probably outwardly dismissive because she's had to drown out her internal overwhelming guilt of focusing on her career vs her family to even get to this point, and admitting that lets the guilt back out of its box. That, and having heard about what's happened to so many mums and grandmas of their generation - getting divorced later in life, but having major gaps on resumes and depressed wages, and then trying to live on that depressed salary on their own, a lot of women feel like they have to set up a backup plan if things don't work out in marriage, or their partner dies unexpectedly. She probably doesn't know how to communicate all that to her partner without hurting his feelings, or blowing it up into a bigger fight. There's def a communication breakdown between them though, so they probably should talk about what her goals and ambitions are, and if she's only using this job to leverage it into a better one with WFH benefits, or a hybrid type where it's certain days. Then maybe having a light at the end of the tunnel with it maybe only being one year in the grand scheme of things would help both of them push through, cuz it seems like she's also not enjoying her new job.
I find it frustrating that women have to keep explaining it to men. It's not like they can't logically think through those problems, they just don't care and they just dismiss womens sacrifices and pain.
Nah, if you have the flu/legit sick I’ll clean up your vomit, but if you drink too much that’s on you. Idc if you pay all the bills, it’s not happening.
THIS!!!! I 100% agree, if my partner was genuinely sick, something beyond their control then I wouldn’t bat an eye over cleaning things up for them as I would hope my partner would do the same for me but when it comes to drinking so much that they make themselves sick then that is no one’s responsibility but their own!
"She needs to find a way to be more present in our daily lives because we feel like we never see her was met with hostility." Let me womansplain the wife's reaction to that comment. Husband said that but Wife heard you are failing as a Mom and spouse. You aren't doing your *real* job. Husband didn't mean that at all. It was a neutral statement. But that's how women are taught and raised to think. You are told you must be Super Mom. Every aspect of your parenting is judged. You are shamed constantly as a Mom. You are also shamed for not having a great career. Toxic Perfectionism has been hammered into women. She has three kids. I wonder how that has affected her career? She used to have more time for everyone. So now she is in a new job, tired, probable missing her family. And her husband is speaking to her but all she hears him saying is, "Failure, you are failing your family. You are failing your kids." This is why she is getting defensive and heated at the husbands words. They all sound like criticism. What this needs is a little more patience. Which she asked for. But for the sake of the argument. When facing a problem. Don't see it as Husband vs Wife. See the situation as US vs the problem together. Then it's not you are doing something wrong. Also use the I feel. Like, Honey I feel like I don't get to see you at all. And I miss you. How can we plan things a little more so we have family time? I noticed the wife is eating alone stressed by the commute. Is there maybe some calming music or mindfulness that may help the drive? Could they adjust dinner a little so we can all eat together? Can we spend some time talking more before bed? The husband seems to resent the job. Has he asked her how the job is going? Is she adjusting? Does she like it? If she felt more supported in the job she might be less stressed and have more energy at home? If he has time to talk and vent more about how he is adjusting maybe he would be less stressed as well. They are a team. It's not Husband vs Wife. It's the family facing the problem together. Time out's if things are getting heated. This is a matter of better communication. Patience and a little grace to each other.
I agree with this. Communication about the problem would help. It would also help if dad was a champion for his wife, he could be talking to his kids about mom being a great role model for working hard and achieving goals. Yeah, she’s really busy but that’s not permanent. The way we support each other shows up in a big way. Mom could turn around on weekends and talk about dad in the same way. Dads cooking is getting so good, he’s so good at helping with your homework. Teach those kids that supporting each other through transition is hard but can be done when we champion each other.
The one where she no longer works from home: she needs to worry about her career trajectory because the chance of divorce is at least 50% and I guarantee you he would not want to make up (financially) for her sacrifice if she went back to staying at home, doing everything and making less.
Your transitions are so wonderful! It is probably my favorite part of your show. It is something so many people forget and it's awkward and weird. I genuinely could listen to y'all for hours (and have recently 😂).
The brother having a mental breakdown (and the parents claiming it was a suicide attempt) because his brother won't forgive him is so obviously a manipulation tactic. It reminds me of those stories where someone dumps their boyfriend/girlfriend and the dumped person claims they'll commit suicide they don't get back together. Well, let's say they do get back together, or the brother forgives the cheating brother. The suicidal person now has this blank check for terrible behavior because somehow they are no longer responsible for their own actions or their own mental health. The dumper or the OP brother is now trapped in a toxic relationship where he is ALWAYS the bad guy even though the suicidal person is the one going around hurting people. Yuck. The only appropriate response to that kind of statement is to run far away. Grandma is right that if he really is suicidal he needs professional help, and she can help him get that, but it's far more likely just a manipulation tactic.
Something people never seem to take into account is that social security benefits are based on how much actually money you make over time. Women that work less to do more at home can get screwed in retirement, especially if you are divorced by then.
Definitely nta with the brother story. Your brother's mental health is not your responsibility. I think he tried to "delete" himself for attention and to try and make OP feel guilty so he would speak to him.
Damn, Kevins parents really knew he was in bad shape and then gave him details he shouldn't have gotten. Mental health can not be dependent on anyone but oneself. Just heart he didnt even attempt, just wow. Those parents are awful.
The older brother that cheated.... that's called emotional manipulation lmao. Good for op, stay far away from that family until they get actual mental help
10 weeks is only 70 days she didnt even pass the probationary 90 days yet to be able to make her own schedule for him to be upset about her not being home a lot
For the first story, it’s hard but you shouldn’t have to lessen your own comfort and mental health to help someone else. You can build others by breaking yourself. Hopefully the brother’s mental health gets better but it’s not OP’s responsibility.
48:12 Hell no! NTA by a long shot! If anybody's the asshole, it's the fiance that's complaining about the ex! How the hell was he even supposed to know that?
The puke in the sink story: the only time I'm okay with my fiance leaving puke for me to clean is if he is seriously to sick to clean it up and I won't leave it till the next day so I'll clean it, but he always at least tries to clean it up even when he's lying on the floor dying 😂 like babe go to bed you're clearly dead. 😂
Resolution doesn't always mean going back to how things were. Sometimes its just coming to closure with the situation. Forgiveness is way more for you then the other person. No reason to hold hate and rage in your heart like that, it really hurts you more. He can forgive his brother and explain that he forgives but unfortunately the consequences of his behavior remain. Unfortunately a sibling relationship is lost, but don't wish bad or hate. Wish him well and be on your way. Resolve it and go on with your life. The frequent calls will stop and he will have to own his own mental health.
The second to last story totally reminded me of the episode from how I met your mother where Lily, Marshall, Robin and Barney are sitting with Ted and a photo album just pointing at all the different women in each of the photos saying name that b****.
With the hate her job story: My dad used to work pretty high up at a big gas company here in Australia. He used to leave home around 7am and get back around 6pm. He was constantly stressed. My mother always said that he gave his heart and soul to that company. After many years of work there, probably over 15 maybe more he was made redundant. It was at a very bad time as both my brother and I were in the middle of high school going to expensive private schools, where my mum was just an early learners teacher's assistant not earning nearly as much as my dad. It was a hard time for my family but I did enjoy spending time with my dad and him being able to take me to school. It was a hard time as my parents had just used savings to renovate the kitchen, living and dining. It is much better now as my dad is a financial controller at a different company and has the flexibility to do more things for himself, as he still goes in early but he can go play Masters Sport in the afternoon after work, and even leave work early for it.
The photo thing - the issue is the brother obviously hasn't been honest with his current gf about his past. So of course she's upset - it's his problem to clean up, not hers, not her parents. Although parents coddling him is also unhealthy (and part of why he's a dishonest, unaccountable cad)
hello, thanks for the Reddit stories. can y’all put the story on the screen while it’s being read? since y’all interrupt/speak over the person reading it + there’s lots of overlapping voices the entire time, it would make your videos accessible to those of us w| hearing impairments, audio processing issues, ADHD, and/or who are neurodivergent in some other way. for context: auto-generated CC is worthless w| this many ppl in one video speaking over each other the entire time. 😬 so w|o submitting manual CC or editing the auto-generated transcript, all we have is overlapping audio. obviously, you don’t have to put the story on the screen, it’s just a request. just discovered your channel today, so this is only my third//fourth video, but i miss so much in each one due to lack of accessibility. experience says if i’m struggling, others w| similar accessibility needs are as well + are/were scared to speak up//make an accessibility request or who just gave up + clicked off in frustration. thanks for the consideration. :0) all the best! 🖤✊🏾♿️ [left this comment on a video + didn’t realize until after that it’s much older + y’all may not see it. (not tryna spam y’all. LOL) :0)]
adhd-er here, and i agree that'd be suuper useful - im managing well enough to follow along but it can get difficult sometimes, and having it on screen feels better and weirdly more secure lol cuz then I know i'm hearing things right and getting the story right and such
@@Juupitrr exaaaactly. plus it helps when i inevitably lose focus + can just pause to see what i missed. LOL instead of rewinding a dozen times + hoping for the best. 😅 BTW, don't know if you saw, but they added a screenshot of the story to the video they released this morning! 😊 🖤✊🏾
The first story is sad, if the older brother really regrets what he did, which it seems that way, he started crying when OP acted like he didn’t know him/ that they were strangers. I don’t know if I’d forgive my sibling for that, but I would miss our relationship. I do know families like this, so manipulative. Literally my dad’s side of his family. My dad was emotionally abusive but tried to gaslight me he wasn’t and the rest of his family agreed and said stuff like “he’s still your dad.” he even pretended to have CANCER.
He should have known this before he had a relation with his brothers girlfriend when he knew it was so serious that he wanted to propose. It also seems like the parents probably knew of the affair and if the brother didn’t find out they would have continued it.
“You’re taking time away time with the family blah blah” Bro, if YOU were the one in her job with the pay bump and commute, everyone would applaud you for being a provider. She does it and she’s being unfair to the kids and you? Bffr
Maddie is so fucking funny 😂 the break dancing old lady on the train had me cackling and the frat boy voice for the guy who dated his fiancé’s nemesis best bits in this episode
Actions have consequences and the way the brother's story reads, I doubt this is the first time the older brother did something to the younger brother and the parents decided an apology was all that was needed to get forgiveness. I have a sister who has screwed over multiple siblings and my mom always made excuses for her.
The last story he’s basically thinking the friend is gonna be like “your wife has a UTERUS?!? The kind with a LINING?!? THAT SHEDS?!?! Omg ewww!!!” 😂 insert clip of Branch from Trolls flipping tables and yelling and running away lol
Man grandparents can be so awesome sometimes 🤧💕 also, if the older brother wanted maintain his relationship with OP, maybe don’t sleep with his gf???????? Like hello???
18:09 yep!!! I came from that kinda family and NEVER tolerated it. I’m the black sheep that they call to regulate when people can’t have conversations or somebody did something foul.
it sounds to me like the parents are making things worse between the brothers actually. why are they forcing communication and telling them things they say about each other? edit: Oh so the parents truly are the villain 💀
In the first story, Op is not the asshole but could possibly use therapy to help move past this for their own life and own sake. The brother also needs to get some help. The parents need to respect boundaries and stop meddling in their sons buisiness
I think it's funny how the guy was like "I suggested she find a way to be more present in our life" sir..... that is what you want, not a suggestion about how to do that or what would make you feel like she's being more present 😂
Men are so often cheered for advancing their careers and working longer hours expecting the woman to take care of the kids while also working. Why aren't these men held accountable and told, dont try to get promoted, or make partner, you have to be home and do laundry and change diapers?
I like the thing he said about flirting because flirting is a default of like, platonic. Like an older person can flirt with a younger person at the checkout line and its cute. The security comes from everyone knowing its all in good fun. Not some workplace harassment or innuendos or shit but like uh hhhghuhh hguhhh chantee etc etc
with the man who hates his job, i need more info. he doesnt say anything about his job. what if he doesnt have one is just home all day doing nothing and she HAS to work this hard to pick up the slack. idk usually when making such a post you would talk about such things so im a little suspicious
1. NTA. The brother was so disrespectful and didn't Luke the consequences. No one cared about how OP was doing except the grandparents and extended family. 2. NTA. If the husband had a terrible stomach bug or actually sick, then maybe. But he got too drunk and got sick. That's on him. 3.NTA. Just because someone is young doesn't mean anyone should assume that they are completely healthy. The older woman should of asked if she could move, and with OP saying no, she needs the seat, the woman should of assumed that op needed it, not argued just because she is young. 4. NTA. OP and Wife are both living with her new job. Not just her. OP is justified to express how he feels and how the job is affecting the family. She is never home now. OP is taking all the responsibilities that she dumped after taking the new job. 5.NTA. OP didn't want them in the pictures to begin with. Everyone made OP let the nemesis in the pictures. Brother should pay for it. 6.NTA. Husband and friend need to grow up.
4th Actually she originally worked at the office. It's only during the pandemic that she started working from home and probably started doing more of the housework. I think OP can express his opinion be has to also realize how much of her career she has already sacrificed for him and the kids. Now that she is back to working outside the home, he has to pick back up his share of the household and child duties.
For the first story about the brothers I say he should forgive his brother. He has a right to feel angry of course but forgiveness is not about the other person it's for you to heal. It's toxic for yourself to hold so much anger. You can still forgive him but just let him know y'all's relationship will never be the same.
Ngl first story i disagree and op is a pos like I get what the brother did was messed up but at the end of the day that's your brother and to have no care for him is kind of disgusting. I would understand if the brother was always a pos but he wasn't he just fucked up. No siblings don't have to be best friends but they aren't asking to be best friends he just wants his brother back.
That first story is so sad. OP’s unforgiveness will become like a poison. If his brother or if anyone dies in the family it could cause a mental break for him. OP really needs to go to therapy. Forgive his family, forgiveness doesn’t mean being close again, and move on. That unforgiveness can actually have lasting impacts in his current and future relationships. I’m so sad OP has to go through that with such a manipulative family. Hoping for the best and praying for OP’s peace of mind.
No one is fully responsible for anyone else's mental health. The brother clearly has issues that need to be worked through professionally. It's not fair to put that on the OP. My first partner would threaten deletion often and I learned through that relationship, that you don't have any control over someone else's mental health, even if that person believes it to. Threatening deletion is a just manipulation tactic. People who want to leave the earth have a lot more going on than just one failed relationship.
30:58 You're kind of the asshole here, because you definitely could have told her that you have a prosthetic. I get that it's a touchy subject, and that you're subconscious about it, but this whole entire argument could have been avoided. However, I am all for the embarrassment of any Karen that tries to give anybody trouble for the hell of it. Lmao
No. You don't owe anyone especially a rude and entitled stranger your medically information. She said I am sorry but I really need this seat too should have been the end of the conversation. And she said it not once but twice. One thing I noticed is the woman said this is for the elderly. She didn't include the detail it was also for pregnant women. And she didn't say she was pregnant either. So technically that woman wasn't even supposed to be sitting in that set. She just wanted to boot out someone else. She thought she could bully her.
He doesn't owe her any kind of explanation and to be honest, if she was doing all of that, I would've made a scene and taken my leg off for everyone to see. That's the definition of fuck around and find out. 😁
Yeah I'll go back to TikTok to watch this cause I like the way she reads the stories but the guys reactions are so not it. You like to "hit on your sisters's girlfriend" as a joke? Tf? His comments are always off he is not it at all. And the other one takes too long to form a sentence.
I feel like it's fair to hate her job in the sense that it's taking so much out of her and the family. I think if this was the other way around, and if this was a woman it wouldn't have been met with such a lack of empathy. I think this is a quick way to get burnout. He's doing dinner, getting them ready, picking them up, and just so much more like it's hard to manage that and a full time job. I really don't have many solutions because everything would cost more money. Nanny, food delivery, public transit and etc. On top of everything you don't get to see your partner. It's very taxing even if he was a stay at home dad I would still get it.
It was happening the other way around tho. She was working full time and doing the majority of childcare and housework it sounds like. I’m not saying it’s right but saying that is kinda weird. It’s not fair to put it all on him but I’m not too sympathetic if she was getting the brunt of it all and was working from home.
@@hanaomer4419The difference was that she was already home, and it wasn't fully the other way around. It seems more like the split everything (he dropped them off she picks them up), and (since she was home more, she was able to keep up with the housework during the day) these make it seem it was closer to a 60/40 if anything. And when she got the new job it turned into a 10/90 which is unfair to him
@@GrayTempest work from home doesn’t mean stay at home so dumping more housework/childcare on a work from home parent isn’t fair. And what else did he do other than dropping them off in the morning? You’re assuming that the original arrangement was more even. I honestly don’t know if it was but I’m not sure why she would give up being at home unless being at home was stressful anyway.
@@hanaomer4419 Didn't say it would be fair which is why I said from the quotes he gives a safer assumption of there split work would be more of a 60(her)/40(him) split. The reason for that split was because the quote in the reddit he said and I'll paraphrase here " since she was home more she kepted up with the house work" meaning since she was home she decided to do more house work since it was more convenient. Yes because all we can do is assume and make estimates of the original deal, but if he is able to pick them up now that means he gets home early enough to do more with them, it's a safe assumption to make that he helped with the kids more besides the one thing he mentioned. And it was said in the story for more money and a step up in her career. The husband didn't think the money was worth changing the dynamic they were in which worked for everyone in the family
@@GrayTempest the husband wasn’t picking them up originally tho. She was, so when she was at home who knows when he was getting home from work. And like they said in the video increases in wage wouldn’t be worth giving up the convenience of working from home unless it was a really big wage increase or if for her being at home was stressful anyways.
Net even 5 minutes in but I have to tell you, George Washington didn’t have wooden teeth. His dentures were made with a mix of human teeth (more than likely from slaves) and shaved ivory. They were stained to be able to last in the mouth and therefor looked brown/wooden. 🥲
Life hack…. Don’t sleep with your brother’s girlfriend if you want a good relationship with him.
This. Ultimate disrespect
I agree. I also think that people who sleep and get with people who have been with a relative or friend of theirs is disgusting. Those are the whores and sluts I shame.
Literally.
Being uncomfortable that you can see periods products is like being uncomfortable to see toilet paper
Only if it’s already used or dirty
@@healgothYeah, but if you go looking in the trash, expect to find gross stuff. Too many people get offended by seeing pads in the trash.
When i was living with aunt and uncle, I got in trouble for throwing away my menstrual pads away in the bathroom trash. They were rolled, wrapped in an excessive amount of toilet paper and then wrapped back in their wrapper (because those are water proof). My uncle saw then in my bathroom trash, when he ran in from outside because it was the closest bathroom to the front door. Apparently he was uncomfortable seeing it in MY bathroom trash can.
If the husband can’t handle the sight of a box of pads… pray they don’t have children…
Honestly this is something I would have to nip in the bude. He wouldn't get any sex unless he educated himself. His attitude would be bad for any daughter he had. And it would rub off on the sons.
Exactly. I couldn’t imagine how hard my teen years would’ve been if I couldn’t ask my dad to pick me up some when I needed it
My mother was OBSESSIVE about looking like a perfect family. She stayed in a horrible cheating marriage for years because of it. She’s so much better now but yes it’s a real thing
Regarding first story: Grandma went into full on matriarch mode. Love that for her.
Not the parents trying to gaslight OP into being responsible for their other child’s mental health. Boomers and their lack of respect for boundaries is willlldd
If the children are in their 20s then the parents probably aren't boomers lol. Boomers are old old,
Bruh, his older brother is beyond coddled by those parents
Ok I can accept that this instance of a smack to the head isn’t abusive, especially since it’s in the name of “dont be stupid and let us love you”
in regards to the first story: OP has no obligation to rekindle a relationship with his family but i highly encourage him to go to therapy to try and let that rage go, for his own sake.
My sister and I cut our Mother off after years of abuse. She took advantage of soo many second chances and then proved herself to be a very dangerous and awful human with no consideration for her (adult) children. Some of our family still pressure us (mostly my sister) to make up and forgive her. Luckily, our Grandma is supportive and doesn't try to push for the "let's all be a family and get along" narrative. Grandmas are the GOAT for real.
He doesn’t have anything to apologize for though. Why would his parents ask him to apologize? Like??? The one time he has lasting consequences for his behavior he has a mental breakdown? NTA.
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It was fake too. He tried swallowing a bunch of pills with the father in the house ready to 'stop' him? This is like when the ex threatens to kill themselves if you leave them. It's manipulation. And look he gets to have all the sympathy and family support while OP is the "bad guy".
I literally can’t with Sam describing Woodrow Wilson as a baddie omg lmao
Lol that was a good picture, I just wasn't ready to hear that
The wedding picture story is so funny to me because a close relative of mine got married and had some family pictures done at a professional photo studio. Years later that relative got divorced and their mother opted to draw over the ex with a sharpie instead of getting rid of the nice picture
AITA For telling my wife I hate her job - I think the other thing not being mentioned is how many kids do they have, and how much time did she have to take away from her job to care for each infant? Now she has an opportunity to take a step up in her career, after probably not pursuing those opportunities for the needs of her family, or perhaps waiting for them to get to school age so she could. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, so factoring in the TOTAL average output of each individual over the course of their marriage so far, might help him to get some perspective.
The other crappy thing is, is that women are told they can have it all, and with the crazy cost of living, are kindof forced to juggle both. She's probably outwardly dismissive because she's had to drown out her internal overwhelming guilt of focusing on her career vs her family to even get to this point, and admitting that lets the guilt back out of its box. That, and having heard about what's happened to so many mums and grandmas of their generation - getting divorced later in life, but having major gaps on resumes and depressed wages, and then trying to live on that depressed salary on their own, a lot of women feel like they have to set up a backup plan if things don't work out in marriage, or their partner dies unexpectedly. She probably doesn't know how to communicate all that to her partner without hurting his feelings, or blowing it up into a bigger fight.
There's def a communication breakdown between them though, so they probably should talk about what her goals and ambitions are, and if she's only using this job to leverage it into a better one with WFH benefits, or a hybrid type where it's certain days. Then maybe having a light at the end of the tunnel with it maybe only being one year in the grand scheme of things would help both of them push through, cuz it seems like she's also not enjoying her new job.
I find it frustrating that women have to keep explaining it to men. It's not like they can't logically think through those problems, they just don't care and they just dismiss womens sacrifices and pain.
my thoughts exactly, how long did she have to handle everything before they had that 50/50 situation? he can handle it for a little bit
I think a marriage counselor/therapist would do them some good..
"Take time off/quit" isn't a compromise
Nah, if you have the flu/legit sick I’ll clean up your vomit, but if you drink too much that’s on you. Idc if you pay all the bills, it’s not happening.
THIS!!!! I 100% agree, if my partner was genuinely sick, something beyond their control then I wouldn’t bat an eye over cleaning things up for them as I would hope my partner would do the same for me but when it comes to drinking so much that they make themselves sick then that is no one’s responsibility but their own!
"She needs to find a way to be more present in our daily lives because we feel like we never see her was met with hostility." Let me womansplain the wife's reaction to that comment. Husband said that but Wife heard you are failing as a Mom and spouse. You aren't doing your *real* job.
Husband didn't mean that at all. It was a neutral statement. But that's how women are taught and raised to think. You are told you must be Super Mom. Every aspect of your parenting is judged. You are shamed constantly as a Mom. You are also shamed for not having a great career. Toxic Perfectionism has been hammered into women.
She has three kids. I wonder how that has affected her career? She used to have more time for everyone. So now she is in a new job, tired, probable missing her family.
And her husband is speaking to her but all she hears him saying is, "Failure, you are failing your family. You are failing your kids." This is why she is getting defensive and heated at the husbands words. They all sound like criticism.
What this needs is a little more patience. Which she asked for. But for the sake of the argument.
When facing a problem. Don't see it as Husband vs Wife. See the situation as US vs the problem together. Then it's not you are doing something wrong.
Also use the I feel. Like, Honey I feel like I don't get to see you at all. And I miss you. How can we plan things a little more so we have family time?
I noticed the wife is eating alone stressed by the commute. Is there maybe some calming music or mindfulness that may help the drive? Could they adjust dinner a little so we can all eat together?
Can we spend some time talking more before bed? The husband seems to resent the job. Has he asked her how the job is going? Is she adjusting? Does she like it? If she felt more supported in the job she might be less stressed and have more energy at home?
If he has time to talk and vent more about how he is adjusting maybe he would be less stressed as well. They are a team. It's not Husband vs Wife. It's the family facing the problem together. Time out's if things are getting heated.
This is a matter of better communication. Patience and a little grace to each other.
I agree with this. Communication about the problem would help. It would also help if dad was a champion for his wife, he could be talking to his kids about mom being a great role model for working hard and achieving goals. Yeah, she’s really busy but that’s not permanent. The way we support each other shows up in a big way. Mom could turn around on weekends and talk about dad in the same way. Dads cooking is getting so good, he’s so good at helping with your homework.
Teach those kids that supporting each other through transition is hard but can be done when we champion each other.
i don’t understand why so many guys are allergic to cleaning!? unless they pay for 100% of everything AND my bills… cleaning should be 50/50!!!
The one where she no longer works from home: she needs to worry about her career trajectory because the chance of divorce is at least 50% and I guarantee you he would not want to make up (financially) for her sacrifice if she went back to staying at home, doing everything and making less.
Your transitions are so wonderful! It is probably my favorite part of your show. It is something so many people forget and it's awkward and weird. I genuinely could listen to y'all for hours (and have recently 😂).
The train reenactment is incredible and it made me chuckle so hard
I have to say, I JUST found you guys today and I am LIVING for the chill vibes of this podcast.
The brother having a mental breakdown (and the parents claiming it was a suicide attempt) because his brother won't forgive him is so obviously a manipulation tactic. It reminds me of those stories where someone dumps their boyfriend/girlfriend and the dumped person claims they'll commit suicide they don't get back together. Well, let's say they do get back together, or the brother forgives the cheating brother. The suicidal person now has this blank check for terrible behavior because somehow they are no longer responsible for their own actions or their own mental health. The dumper or the OP brother is now trapped in a toxic relationship where he is ALWAYS the bad guy even though the suicidal person is the one going around hurting people. Yuck. The only appropriate response to that kind of statement is to run far away. Grandma is right that if he really is suicidal he needs professional help, and she can help him get that, but it's far more likely just a manipulation tactic.
Idk I feel like his brother already had problems beforehand and that’s not their responsibility to take care of their mental health.
It's always nice to have support from grandparents, especially when you're in the right.
Madi, the arm shake that you did for the old ladies knees 😭😭😭 that whole reenactment was pure gold 🤣
Found this podcast on Instagram a couple of days ago and I am here for it! Literally bingeing all the episodes!😃
Something people never seem to take into account is that social security benefits are based on how much actually money you make over time. Women that work less to do more at home can get screwed in retirement, especially if you are divorced by then.
For the last story with the pads, tampons , or cup : hide the band aids since they are so uncomfortable seeing that people/ women bleed 🩸
This is my new favorite podcast lol Rating presidents on looks before Reddit stories is something I never knew I needed lmao 🤣🤣🤣
Definitely nta with the brother story. Your brother's mental health is not your responsibility. I think he tried to "delete" himself for attention and to try and make OP feel guilty so he would speak to him.
it would of been funny if yall switched Sam and Brandons sreens for the fist bump
the old lady reenactment sent me LOOOOOL
yessss
Damn, Kevins parents really knew he was in bad shape and then gave him details he shouldn't have gotten. Mental health can not be dependent on anyone but oneself. Just heart he didnt even attempt, just wow. Those parents are awful.
The older brother that cheated.... that's called emotional manipulation lmao. Good for op, stay far away from that family until they get actual mental help
10 weeks is only 70 days she didnt even pass the probationary 90 days yet to be able to make her own schedule for him to be upset about her not being home a lot
You guys are so funny together! I’m new to your channel but I absolutely love it!
For the first story, it’s hard but you shouldn’t have to lessen your own comfort and mental health to help someone else. You can build others by breaking yourself. Hopefully the brother’s mental health gets better but it’s not OP’s responsibility.
48:12 Hell no! NTA by a long shot! If anybody's the asshole, it's the fiance that's complaining about the ex! How the hell was he even supposed to know that?
The puke in the sink story: the only time I'm okay with my fiance leaving puke for me to clean is if he is seriously to sick to clean it up and I won't leave it till the next day so I'll clean it, but he always at least tries to clean it up even when he's lying on the floor dying 😂 like babe go to bed you're clearly dead. 😂
Resolution doesn't always mean going back to how things were. Sometimes its just coming to closure with the situation. Forgiveness is way more for you then the other person. No reason to hold hate and rage in your heart like that, it really hurts you more. He can forgive his brother and explain that he forgives but unfortunately the consequences of his behavior remain. Unfortunately a sibling relationship is lost, but don't wish bad or hate. Wish him well and be on your way. Resolve it and go on with your life. The frequent calls will stop and he will have to own his own mental health.
So rude. People in their fifties and sixties are not in nursing homes! 😂
The second to last story totally reminded me of the episode from how I met your mother where Lily, Marshall, Robin and Barney are sitting with Ted and a photo album just pointing at all the different women in each of the photos saying name that b****.
I will say I miss the couches. It gave the vibe of a comfy gossip sesh
Y’all are funny!! Glad I was recommended y’all today!!
With the hate her job story: My dad used to work pretty high up at a big gas company here in Australia. He used to leave home around 7am and get back around 6pm. He was constantly stressed. My mother always said that he gave his heart and soul to that company. After many years of work there, probably over 15 maybe more he was made redundant. It was at a very bad time as both my brother and I were in the middle of high school going to expensive private schools, where my mum was just an early learners teacher's assistant not earning nearly as much as my dad. It was a hard time for my family but I did enjoy spending time with my dad and him being able to take me to school. It was a hard time as my parents had just used savings to renovate the kitchen, living and dining. It is much better now as my dad is a financial controller at a different company and has the flexibility to do more things for himself, as he still goes in early but he can go play Masters Sport in the afternoon after work, and even leave work early for it.
I just found this channel. Y'alls banter is the best!!!!
The photo thing - the issue is the brother obviously hasn't been honest with his current gf about his past. So of course she's upset - it's his problem to clean up, not hers, not her parents. Although parents coddling him is also unhealthy (and part of why he's a dishonest, unaccountable cad)
hello, thanks for the Reddit stories.
can y’all put the story on the screen while it’s being read? since y’all interrupt/speak over the person reading it + there’s lots of overlapping voices the entire time, it would make your videos accessible to those of us w| hearing impairments, audio processing issues, ADHD, and/or who are neurodivergent in some other way.
for context: auto-generated CC is worthless w| this many ppl in one video speaking over each other the entire time. 😬 so w|o submitting manual CC or editing the auto-generated transcript, all we have is overlapping audio.
obviously, you don’t have to put the story on the screen, it’s just a request. just discovered your channel today, so this is only my third//fourth video, but i miss so much in each one due to lack of accessibility. experience says if i’m struggling, others w| similar accessibility needs are as well + are/were scared to speak up//make an accessibility request or who just gave up + clicked off in frustration.
thanks for the consideration. :0)
all the best! 🖤✊🏾♿️
[left this comment on a video + didn’t realize until after that it’s much older + y’all may not see it. (not tryna spam y’all. LOL) :0)]
adhd-er here, and i agree that'd be suuper useful - im managing well enough to follow along but it can get difficult sometimes, and having it on screen feels better and weirdly more secure lol cuz then I know i'm hearing things right and getting the story right and such
@@Juupitrr exaaaactly. plus it helps when i inevitably lose focus + can just pause to see what i missed. LOL instead of rewinding a dozen times + hoping for the best. 😅
BTW, don't know if you saw, but they added a screenshot of the story to the video they released this morning! 😊
🖤✊🏾
I have been binge watching your videos. Love your channel!!!
I love the train scene you made into a skit
The first story is sad, if the older brother really regrets what he did, which it seems that way, he started crying when OP acted like he didn’t know him/ that they were strangers. I don’t know if I’d forgive my sibling for that, but I would miss our relationship.
I do know families like this, so manipulative. Literally my dad’s side of his family. My dad was emotionally abusive but tried to gaslight me he wasn’t and the rest of his family agreed and said stuff like “he’s still your dad.” he even pretended to have CANCER.
He should have known this before he had a relation with his brothers girlfriend when he knew it was so serious that he wanted to propose. It also seems like the parents probably knew of the affair and if the brother didn’t find out they would have continued it.
“You’re taking time away time with the family blah blah”
Bro, if YOU were the one in her job with the pay bump and commute, everyone would applaud you for being a provider. She does it and she’s being unfair to the kids and you? Bffr
maybe she accepted that bc she was tired of doig so much staying at home
Not me being a twin 😂😂😂😂
Not Jimmy Carter over Obama 😭
Grandma is a saint.
Maddie is so fucking funny 😂 the break dancing old lady on the train had me cackling and the frat boy voice for the guy who dated his fiancé’s nemesis best bits in this episode
40:00 men really don’t want what they give us.
Actions have consequences and the way the brother's story reads, I doubt this is the first time the older brother did something to the younger brother and the parents decided an apology was all that was needed to get forgiveness. I have a sister who has screwed over multiple siblings and my mom always made excuses for her.
the grandma bro 😭 i love her
The last story he’s basically thinking the friend is gonna be like “your wife has a UTERUS?!? The kind with a LINING?!? THAT SHEDS?!?! Omg ewww!!!” 😂 insert clip of Branch from Trolls flipping tables and yelling and running away lol
Piece of feedback: I’d ditch the sound board, y’all are engaging and you don’t need the assist. Love the show
37:59 wait a minute so OP married his wife when he was 18 and the wife was 25?!?
Not the hoochie daddy shorts 😂 missed opportunity
Man grandparents can be so awesome sometimes 🤧💕 also, if the older brother wanted maintain his relationship with OP, maybe don’t sleep with his gf???????? Like hello???
Every person makes a decision and you have to stand by it
Ooof 50/60 is not nursing home old. Those people aren’t even retired. 😂😂 but then “what’s that old song” it’s all tracking. 😭
Alicia's cinematic debut as The Leg 😅💀
Grandma is amazing! 17:46
18:09 yep!!! I came from that kinda family and NEVER tolerated it. I’m the black sheep that they call to regulate when people can’t have conversations or somebody did something foul.
Just found y’all and I’m LOVE THE VIBE. you just got a new subscriber! ❤❤❤
Best vibes ever
Grandmas my gold star gal!
9:42 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I replayed 36:28 sooooo many times 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
it sounds to me like the parents are making things worse between the brothers actually. why are they forcing communication and telling them things they say about each other?
edit: Oh so the parents truly are the villain 💀
I was gonna be real mad if no one said Obama 😂
2nd I don't understand why she would feel guilty at all. Why are women these martyrs for men.
In the first story, Op is not the asshole but could possibly use therapy to help move past this for their own life and own sake. The brother also needs to get some help. The parents need to respect boundaries and stop meddling in their sons buisiness
I think it's funny how the guy was like "I suggested she find a way to be more present in our life" sir..... that is what you want, not a suggestion about how to do that or what would make you feel like she's being more present 😂
*cousins!*
(They are touching opposite sides of the screen)
When you're a parent, you have to take your kids and your family into consideration. I feel that she was somewhat selfish to take the new job.
Men are so often cheered for advancing their careers and working longer hours expecting the woman to take care of the kids while also working. Why aren't these men held accountable and told, dont try to get promoted, or make partner, you have to be home and do laundry and change diapers?
8:47 those parents SUCK
I think grandma healed some of my childhood trauma
I like the thing he said about flirting because flirting is a default of like, platonic. Like an older person can flirt with a younger person at the checkout line and its cute. The security comes from everyone knowing its all in good fun. Not some workplace harassment or innuendos or shit but like uh hhhghuhh hguhhh chantee etc etc
1:00:15 It’s a man’s world, but it’s a men’s stration.
with the man who hates his job, i need more info. he doesnt say anything about his job. what if he doesnt have one is just home all day doing nothing and she HAS to work this hard to pick up the slack. idk usually when making such a post you would talk about such things so im a little suspicious
1. NTA. The brother was so disrespectful and didn't Luke the consequences. No one cared about how OP was doing except the grandparents and extended family.
2. NTA. If the husband had a terrible stomach bug or actually sick, then maybe. But he got too drunk and got sick. That's on him.
3.NTA. Just because someone is young doesn't mean anyone should assume that they are completely healthy. The older woman should of asked if she could move, and with OP saying no, she needs the seat, the woman should of assumed that op needed it, not argued just because she is young.
4. NTA. OP and Wife are both living with her new job. Not just her. OP is justified to express how he feels and how the job is affecting the family. She is never home now. OP is taking all the responsibilities that she dumped after taking the new job.
5.NTA. OP didn't want them in the pictures to begin with. Everyone made OP let the nemesis in the pictures. Brother should pay for it.
6.NTA. Husband and friend need to grow up.
4th Actually she originally worked at the office. It's only during the pandemic that she started working from home and probably started doing more of the housework.
I think OP can express his opinion be has to also realize how much of her career she has already sacrificed for him and the kids. Now that she is back to working outside the home, he has to pick back up his share of the household and child duties.
14:43 see? Dude was right!
10:20 Kevin been the favorite. You can tell. Just by the way he behaves
This episode was so good😂😂😂
Yo. This is veeeerrrryyy common in Asian households
For the first story about the brothers I say he should forgive his brother. He has a right to feel angry of course but forgiveness is not about the other person it's for you to heal. It's toxic for yourself to hold so much anger. You can still forgive him but just let him know y'all's relationship will never be the same.
Ngl first story i disagree and op is a pos like I get what the brother did was messed up but at the end of the day that's your brother and to have no care for him is kind of disgusting. I would understand if the brother was always a pos but he wasn't he just fucked up. No siblings don't have to be best friends but they aren't asking to be best friends he just wants his brother back.
rutherford b hayes (young)
That first story is so sad. OP’s unforgiveness will become like a poison. If his brother or if anyone dies in the family it could cause a mental break for him. OP really needs to go to therapy. Forgive his family, forgiveness doesn’t mean being close again, and move on. That unforgiveness can actually have lasting impacts in his current and future relationships. I’m so sad OP has to go through that with such a manipulative family. Hoping for the best and praying for OP’s peace of mind.
No one is fully responsible for anyone else's mental health. The brother clearly has issues that need to be worked through professionally. It's not fair to put that on the OP.
My first partner would threaten deletion often and I learned through that relationship, that you don't have any control over someone else's mental health, even if that person believes it to. Threatening deletion is a just manipulation tactic. People who want to leave the earth have a lot more going on than just one failed relationship.
30:58 You're kind of the asshole here, because you definitely could have told her that you have a prosthetic. I get that it's a touchy subject, and that you're subconscious about it, but this whole entire argument could have been avoided. However, I am all for the embarrassment of any Karen that tries to give anybody trouble for the hell of it. Lmao
being an asshole for a good cause lol
No. You don't owe anyone especially a rude and entitled stranger your medically information. She said I am sorry but I really need this seat too should have been the end of the conversation. And she said it not once but twice. One thing I noticed is the woman said this is for the elderly.
She didn't include the detail it was also for pregnant women. And she didn't say she was pregnant either. So technically that woman wasn't even supposed to be sitting in that set. She just wanted to boot out someone else. She thought she could bully her.
@@kellharris2491 That's why i called her a Karen. Lol
@@gavin9956 this is why i think there should be a rating called YTABJ.
He doesn't owe her any kind of explanation and to be honest, if she was doing all of that, I would've made a scene and taken my leg off for everyone to see. That's the definition of fuck around and find out. 😁
Yeah I'll go back to TikTok to watch this cause I like the way she reads the stories but the guys reactions are so not it. You like to "hit on your sisters's girlfriend" as a joke? Tf? His comments are always off he is not it at all. And the other one takes too long to form a sentence.
I feel like it's fair to hate her job in the sense that it's taking so much out of her and the family. I think if this was the other way around, and if this was a woman it wouldn't have been met with such a lack of empathy. I think this is a quick way to get burnout. He's doing dinner, getting them ready, picking them up, and just so much more like it's hard to manage that and a full time job.
I really don't have many solutions because everything would cost more money. Nanny, food delivery, public transit and etc. On top of everything you don't get to see your partner. It's very taxing even if he was a stay at home dad I would still get it.
It was happening the other way around tho. She was working full time and doing the majority of childcare and housework it sounds like. I’m not saying it’s right but saying that is kinda weird. It’s not fair to put it all on him but I’m not too sympathetic if she was getting the brunt of it all and was working from home.
@@hanaomer4419The difference was that she was already home, and it wasn't fully the other way around. It seems more like the split everything (he dropped them off she picks them up), and (since she was home more, she was able to keep up with the housework during the day) these make it seem it was closer to a 60/40 if anything. And when she got the new job it turned into a 10/90 which is unfair to him
@@GrayTempest work from home doesn’t mean stay at home so dumping more housework/childcare on a work from home parent isn’t fair. And what else did he do other than dropping them off in the morning? You’re assuming that the original arrangement was more even. I honestly don’t know if it was but I’m not sure why she would give up being at home unless being at home was stressful anyway.
@@hanaomer4419 Didn't say it would be fair which is why I said from the quotes he gives a safer assumption of there split work would be more of a 60(her)/40(him) split. The reason for that split was because the quote in the reddit he said and I'll paraphrase here " since she was home more she kepted up with the house work" meaning since she was home she decided to do more house work since it was more convenient.
Yes because all we can do is assume and make estimates of the original deal, but if he is able to pick them up now that means he gets home early enough to do more with them, it's a safe assumption to make that he helped with the kids more besides the one thing he mentioned. And it was said in the story for more money and a step up in her career. The husband didn't think the money was worth changing the dynamic they were in which worked for everyone in the family
@@GrayTempest the husband wasn’t picking them up originally tho. She was, so when she was at home who knows when he was getting home from work. And like they said in the video increases in wage wouldn’t be worth giving up the convenience of working from home unless it was a really big wage increase or if for her being at home was stressful anyways.
Net even 5 minutes in but I have to tell you, George Washington didn’t have wooden teeth. His dentures were made with a mix of human teeth (more than likely from slaves) and shaved ivory. They were stained to be able to last in the mouth and therefor looked brown/wooden. 🥲