Thank you for connecting me to this video..such a lot to think about and how I can redirect my feeling of anger towards the medical professionals who were involved in my treatment and care in my recovery and now realizing it is not just anger with them, but Im also angry for the dx of lobular cancer which is so difficult to dx and when found was encompassing practically my entire breast. Fortunately I am able to be so grateful to my PCP who examined my breast and set everything in motion and I am alive and well.. I understand the importance of forgiving and so much for me is accepting, and letting the anger go. I'm struggling with how to do it which makes me angry at myself..around and around I go..thank you for providing me a lot of food for thought,your support and, continued assurance.
It’s completely natural to feel anger towards the medical professionals and the diagnosis itself, especially when it’s something as difficult to diagnose as lobular cancer. It’s wonderful that your PCP was proactive and set everything in motion. Forgiving and letting go of anger is a challenging process, and it’s okay to struggle with it. It’s a journey, not a destination. Take it one step at a time and be kind to yourself. Dr. Griggs tells people in her forgiveness groups, "Forgive yourself for not forgiving."
Thank you Dr Griggs for a wonderful and compassionate video on forgiveness. I was diagnosed with early breast cancer in mid June of this year. I reached out to my best friend for support and unfortunately, that need for connection and care was turned down.This occurred the day before I had surgery. I was devastated. I have not heard from my best friend since then. I continue to care for my friend and wish to forgive. Dr Griggs, your guidance on recovering the good memories and the positive things in the friendship in a new story was very helpful. Thank you so much. It hurts every day however, I know there is a way to release this pain.
We truly appreciate your kind words. Your situation is undoubtedly challenging, and it's inspiring that you're seeking a path to forgiveness and healing. It's understandable that the pain continues, but as you've mentioned, there is a way to release it. Focusing on the positive memories and rewriting the story of your friendship can be a powerful step towards healing. You're displaying tremendous resilience and we applaud you. Thank you for watching. Yerbba is rooting for you!
I'm sorry you're so called "friend" turned her back on you. I would not be foolish enough to talk to her again or act like she did nothing. But you do what you feel is right for you, I'm just speaking for myself. I would keep her out of my life and surround myself with the good people who care about me. You deserve way better than someone like her. You can forgive her if you choose, but I don't think that means you have to be friends with her. She doesn't have a clue what a real friend is. I wish you the best of health.
Thanks for writing. It is likely the case that you made the best decision for your health at that time given the pandemic. Regrets can feel so heavy. We are seeing a lot of people with higher stage disease because of missed mammograms during the pandemic. Please be kind to yourself.
Dear Doctor Griggs, you explained so well and wisely, I found it so hard to forgive and forget, almost I fight with my emotions or try to forgive, it's so hard, but I think better to forgive, because cannot change pass, remembering pass causing more pain, I try not to remember, thank you ❤
Thanks for writing. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. In some ways, we should not forget…remembering can help us be safe going forward, and the things that hurt us are part of our life's story. Forgiveness means we change our relationship to the past, not erase it. I hope this is helpful.
I do need to watch this again. A lot to absorb thank you. Actually I spoke to a medical professional that I felt she didn’t show empathy. I failed to remind her that I didn’t need to hear, oh that’s not so bad. Thinking back I was on the edge of the great precipice of pain. I should of asked for pain meds. I kept thinking/hoping tomorrow would be better…..this was during radiation.
Thanks for sharing your story. People are not particularly skilled in validating patient's experiences. Such unskilled remarks are an attempt to "soothe" both the patient and, sometimes, the doctor too.
@@catherinerobilliard7662Hi Catherine, I m so sorry to hear loss of your daughter 😢, that is a huge trauma 😔, yes I go through few trauma in my life too, I was in high level of stress, much love to you ❤
Great question. The literature on trauma and cancer has been a challenge to interpret. So many people have trauma. There's a recent study, however, that looked at identical twins. Those twins that had been traumatized had a higher risk of cancer and inflammatory conditions than the identical twin who had not. It appears that trauma over the life course (over many years) has an impact on our risk of cancer and other chronic conditions.
I had to forgive myself for being utterly stupid 😂for not going to the doctor when I first realized there was a tiny mass in my left breast. Well, that was dumb. Lol. I was trying to use essiac formula for over ten years hoping to dissolve it by myself. 😳😞 oh boy. Then one day, I saw it grew so big that it made its way to the surface 😟 and it looked like a giant scab! It bled and I used a gazillion bandaids and disinfectant spray everyday for weeks before I gave up the fight. The fight of denial that it could be a cancer lump. 🥺 My family didnt even know. So the day I gave up covering up, the look on my husband’s face when I walked into his office to show him! I thought he was going to have a heart attack! 😂 So off to the doctor I went! She was pacing back & forth saying oh I wish the doctor was here lolol. She was a nurse practitioner so she called my doctor and then I was sent right away to a surgeon. 😊 Horray!! She said it was so large, she would have to cut it at an angle to get all of it lol. 😂 Well that was fine with me!! I was so thankful she could get rid of the dumb thing! So, that was the beginning of a long journey towards healing. I had IDC breast cancer. 😮oh lordy! Lucky ducky me, because I responded to the chemo and the radiation, and Iam in my almost 3rd year of cancer care. I have the best doctors!! 🤩🥳🤩❤️❤️❤️❤️ My only bad deal is I had advanced OA before any treatments, so the side affects caused Osteoperosis. Iam halfway through my Zometa infusions. Its a 3 year plan. Once every six months, I have an infusion. Hopefully my bones will get stronger. My only disappointment is getting thin after chemo, only to eventually gain the weight back due to water gain from the Lymphedema. The lymph nodes removal caused alot of water gain. So that was sad. 😢 The PT nurse warned me that might happen. But I decided to be happy anyway about so many beautiful positive things in my life, that its OKAY not to be thin, because the people who love me, including my two dogs! 😂❤ and my husband, gives me joy in spite of that loss!! Iam surviving happily! I just have to wear a few sizes larger in clothes! 😂🤭🫣lololol😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤ Dont lose hope! God is always near. ❤️✝️🙏🙏🙏👍 Iam 68yrs old now.
Thank you for sharing your journey with such honesty and humor to the Yerbba community. It's inspiring to see your resilience and positive outlook throughout the challenges you've faced. Your determination to seek medical help and go through treatments has paid off, and it's wonderful to hear that you have such a supportive network of loved ones. Thanks for watching!
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Thank you for connecting me to this video..such a lot to think about and how I can redirect my feeling of anger towards the medical professionals who were involved in my treatment and care in my recovery and now realizing it is not just anger with them, but Im also angry for the dx of lobular cancer which is so difficult to dx and when found was encompassing practically my entire breast. Fortunately I am able to be so grateful to my PCP who examined my breast and set everything in motion and I am alive and well.. I understand the importance of forgiving and so much for me is accepting, and letting the anger go. I'm struggling with how to do it which makes me angry at myself..around and around I go..thank you for providing me a lot of food for thought,your support and,
continued assurance.
It’s completely natural to feel anger towards the medical professionals and the diagnosis itself, especially when it’s something as difficult to diagnose as lobular cancer. It’s wonderful that your PCP was proactive and set everything in motion. Forgiving and letting go of anger is a challenging process, and it’s okay to struggle with it. It’s a journey, not a destination. Take it one step at a time and be kind to yourself. Dr. Griggs tells people in her forgiveness groups, "Forgive yourself for not forgiving."
Wow!!! Thanks so much for this. I’m not on an island. ❤ you have been an immense resource, the reminder of having empathy for self and others.
We're so glad this video resonated with you. Thank you for being part of the Yerbba community, and there are no islands here.
Thank you Dr Griggs for a wonderful and compassionate video on forgiveness. I was diagnosed with early breast cancer in mid June of this year. I reached out to my best friend for support and unfortunately, that need for connection and care was turned down.This occurred the day before I had surgery. I was devastated. I have not heard from my best friend since then. I continue to care for my friend and wish to forgive. Dr Griggs, your guidance on recovering the good memories and the positive things in the friendship in a new story was very helpful. Thank you so much. It hurts every day however, I know there is a way to release this pain.
We truly appreciate your kind words. Your situation is undoubtedly challenging, and it's inspiring that you're seeking a path to forgiveness and healing. It's understandable that the pain continues, but as you've mentioned, there is a way to release it. Focusing on the positive memories and rewriting the story of your friendship can be a powerful step towards healing. You're displaying tremendous resilience and we applaud you. Thank you for watching. Yerbba is rooting for you!
I'm sorry you're so called "friend" turned her back on you. I would not be foolish enough to talk to her again or act like she did nothing. But you do what you feel is right for you, I'm just speaking for myself. I would keep her out of my life and surround myself with the good people who care about me. You deserve way better than someone like her. You can forgive her if you choose, but I don't think that means you have to be friends with her. She doesn't have a clue what a real friend is. I wish you the best of health.
I still have hard time to forgive myself for postponing my mammogram during Covid . End up with stage 3 breast cancer 😢
Thanks for writing. It is likely the case that you made the best decision for your health at that time given the pandemic. Regrets can feel so heavy. We are seeing a lot of people with higher stage disease because of missed mammograms during the pandemic. Please be kind to yourself.
Thank you. ❤
Dear Doctor Griggs, you explained so well and wisely, I found it so hard to forgive and forget, almost I fight with my emotions or try to forgive, it's so hard, but I think better to forgive, because cannot change pass, remembering pass causing more pain, I try not to remember, thank you ❤
Thanks for writing. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. In some ways, we should not forget…remembering can help us be safe going forward, and the things that hurt us are part of our life's story. Forgiveness means we change our relationship to the past, not erase it. I hope this is helpful.
@@yerbba its very helpful thank you very much ❤
I do need to watch this again. A lot to absorb thank you. Actually I spoke to a medical professional that I felt she didn’t show empathy. I failed to remind her that I didn’t need to hear, oh that’s not so bad. Thinking back I was on the edge of the great precipice of pain. I should of asked for pain meds. I kept thinking/hoping tomorrow would be better…..this was during radiation.
Thanks for sharing your story. People are not particularly skilled in validating patient's experiences. Such unskilled remarks are an attempt to "soothe" both the patient and, sometimes, the doctor too.
Thank you😊
Thank you for watching and being part of the Yerbba community!
Thank you for your helpful advice.
You are so welcome!
Another great video thanks
Thank you for watching and your positive comment!
Dear doctor, I just like to know that trauma and high level of stress could causes cancer? I always think there is a link between. Thank you X
@@catherinerobilliard7662Hi Catherine, I m so sorry to hear loss of your daughter 😢, that is a huge trauma 😔, yes I go through few trauma in my life too, I was in high level of stress, much love to you ❤
Great question. The literature on trauma and cancer has been a challenge to interpret. So many people have trauma. There's a recent study, however, that looked at identical twins. Those twins that had been traumatized had a higher risk of cancer and inflammatory conditions than the identical twin who had not. It appears that trauma over the life course (over many years) has an impact on our risk of cancer and other chronic conditions.
@@yerbba dear doctor, thank you so much for your time to answering X ❤
I had to forgive myself for being utterly stupid 😂for not going to the doctor when I first realized there was a tiny mass in my left breast. Well, that was dumb. Lol. I was trying to use essiac formula for over ten years hoping to dissolve it by myself. 😳😞 oh boy. Then one day, I saw it grew so big that it made its way to the surface 😟 and it looked like a giant scab! It bled and I used a gazillion bandaids and disinfectant spray everyday for weeks before I gave up the fight. The fight of denial that it could be a cancer lump. 🥺 My family didnt even know. So the day I gave up covering up, the look on my husband’s face when I walked into his office to show him! I thought he was going to have a heart attack! 😂 So off to the doctor I went! She was pacing back & forth saying oh I wish the doctor was here lolol. She was a nurse practitioner so she called my doctor and then I was sent right away to a surgeon. 😊 Horray!! She said it was so large, she would have to cut it at an angle to get all of it lol. 😂 Well that was fine with me!! I was so thankful she could get rid of the dumb thing! So, that was the beginning of a long journey towards healing. I had IDC breast cancer. 😮oh lordy! Lucky ducky me, because I responded to the chemo and the radiation, and Iam in my almost 3rd year of cancer care. I have the best doctors!! 🤩🥳🤩❤️❤️❤️❤️ My only bad deal is I had advanced OA before any treatments, so the side affects caused Osteoperosis. Iam halfway through my Zometa infusions. Its a 3 year plan. Once every six months, I have an infusion. Hopefully my bones will get stronger. My only disappointment is getting thin after chemo, only to eventually gain the weight back due to water gain from the Lymphedema. The lymph nodes removal caused alot of water gain. So that was sad. 😢 The PT nurse warned me that might happen. But I decided to be happy anyway about so many beautiful positive things in my life, that its OKAY not to be thin, because the people who love me, including my two dogs! 😂❤ and my husband, gives me joy in spite of that loss!! Iam surviving happily! I just have to wear a few sizes larger in clothes! 😂🤭🫣lololol😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤ Dont lose hope! God is always near. ❤️✝️🙏🙏🙏👍 Iam 68yrs old now.
Thank you for sharing your journey with such honesty and humor to the Yerbba community. It's inspiring to see your resilience and positive outlook throughout the challenges you've faced. Your determination to seek medical help and go through treatments has paid off, and it's wonderful to hear that you have such a supportive network of loved ones. Thanks for watching!
where are the studies??
There are numerous studies on the power of forgiveness, including work by Fred Luskin, Everett Worthington, and others.
Some people blame God for their cancer so some people need to forgive God.
True true! That can be especially hard to do.