Who now would describe their movie or show as "Star Trek meets [literally anything]"? The Orville was the best Star Trek between Voyager and Picard S3 and Unification.
Star Trek used to be a platform for stories about higher morals and values, it was about the building of trust, and teamwork amongst a crew alone in the void. Now it’s become just another revenue stream built on the back of once great scifi.
Nah, Star Trek V is a lot of fun, it's like a tribute to the original T.V show vibe, and the memorable quotes are fun, too. "Why does God need a Starship?" Like so many things, it's trendy to hate The Final Frontier and no other opinion is allowed.
1. I haven't seen Section 31, but I have no difficulty believing that it's just awful, like all modern Trek. 2. Go back and watch V again, but treat it like you're watching a long episode of TOS instead of a movie with the TOS cast. I would be shocked if you didn't end up reevaluating.
Are you tellin me that a show that has a poster of an aging woman looking boss girl with her foot on a guy on the ground is generic and predictable slop?
My grandfather is a super Treky. But he saw that there was a new Star Trek movie. But he didn’t even make it 20 minutes in and turned it off. He got pissed off and turned on Deep Space Nine to cleanse his palette
And even those two series were filled with all the woke talking points and imagery. Adjusted for inflation. Go look at them again now that you have some "antibodies", if you do not believe me.
@@baswenmakers6846 "antibodies" that's some funny shit! I'm a big trek fan and i agree with you. some of the decisions that they made were bad progressive. ex: picard should have been relieved of duty for not sending that borg geordie befriended back to the borg collective carrying the virus to destroy them.
I bet you I’ve cycled through more bad episodes of TNG and DS9 than new trek. EDIT: That was totally not what I mean, I mean, I watch more of those episodes than I do new trek.
When are these people gonna figure out that Star Trek isn't an action series? It was written for people who wanted to think about their stories not be distracted by endless fights. That's why the Kelvin timeline didn't really go that well. Star Trek is science fiction not a space opera. It's meant to explore interesting questions about how we would relate to new species and new cultures. Sure there's some action but it's meant to serve as a plot device not be the crux of the story.
But that Logic of Spock could be a like Dao Monk or something trying to master you can sort of relate it, now a boomer is my mother or father who are the boomers in this movie ?
All this. They're too focused on trying to make a low budget Star Wars movie with "Trek" characters these days, and they're losing sight of the fact that story was always the main focus for Trek. Star Trek has been dead for a while and, like Pet Cemetery showed us, the revived beast is never going to be the same.
How in gods name does Alex Kurtzman still have a job? Not a job in Hollywood, a job. He has singlehandedly compromised Star Trek in a way that JJ Abrams never imagined possible.
I heard that he is the ultimate ass kisser. He will say yes to everyone's ideas even if it makes the show a jumbled mess . He keeps being brought back because they know he is a pushover who will allow them to insert their ideas into the show. Ends up with too many cooks in the kitchen and no real head chef to keep them on track.
@@sd7335 They didn't invent "woke", they just copied the homework of that Italian guy, Gramsci, and slapped a new name on it. Then they moved to the US and took "their" idea with them, like most successful "startups" in the US.
Paramount and Disney have two things in common: (1) They are both utterly impervious to learning from their mistakes. (2) They blame their mistakes on the fans, criticize the fans for not liking their mistakes, and then double down on making even more mistakes. In Science, it's called a "positive feedback loop". In society, it's called, "WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU???"
In biology, living in a bubble works for the very brief time until something outside of the bubble comes in, bursts it and eats/destroys everything in it. Something which the entertainment industry has been finding out for the last decade.
AS a kid in the 70's, all there was was TOS. And it was glorious. Every episode made you think, made you curious, made you feel both entertained and satisfied. Later, we got TNG, and it was similar; much more polished, but still a thinking person's TV show. The problem now is that the people writing and making these shows and movies stopped developing emotionally as 14 year olds, and they are writing for people who are trapped in adult adolescence. We don't want fights and explosions; we want STORIES, well told and acted.
When I was a kid in the 80's, I'd stay up until 3am to watch Dr.Who (Baker-era) on my local PBS affiliate. Now, I can't even be bothered to watch how the BBC has defiled that legacy. All I know is that they've made it clear people like me aren't welcome in their weird little club. OK. Bye. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
@@TheJohn8765 It really added to the Doctor Who experience as a kid. Staying up till 2am and watching a random episode, passing out as soon as it got to the opening theme. Waking up 20 min later when some green trashbag with eyes screaming and the synth blaring. Those were the days.
Can you imagine the mirth that line generated with Kurtzy and his jesters, from the inception of the script, through to the final screening rooms? Little boys, playing with expensive toys, giddy, like the vermin who graffiti over ancient ruins. It's nothing less.
The ‘Oirish’ accent on the flee / Vulcan robot guy was the worst…. Jesus, I can’t believe they made this. The over acting, the awful inter character banter, the stupid plot, the rubbish flash back scene….. no joke I started to fall asleep near the end.
Absolutely with you on the horrid accents. And the flashback is ridiculously idiotic. She won a Hunger Games kid contest and suddenly became emperor of the universe? No military training, political experience, or bloody rampage to the top? Was there a current emperor? Why were they being replaced? And of course the scorned love interest comes back as the mysterious latex gimp sub. My headcanon is that, yes, this is a parody. At least that way it's all somewhat amusing as a light-hearted criticism of Star Trek seriousness.
Drinker should be listed in financial advice videos. The amount of time I've saved not watching dogshit movies and instead been more productive has been better than any "how to invest your savings" guide.
I watched it, he’s not joking it’s terrible. I was literally falling asleep near the end. The characters are the most unlikeable bunch I’ve ever seen in a a movie, the dialogue was so bad I laughed at one point at how utterly fake it was. Plot was a nothing, whole movie was one of the worst movies I’ve EVER seen - it’s that bad.
@karmabob42 I don't miss what I don't enjoy. I wouldn't waste the little time I have on earth to "understand" an obscure reference. I just move on & enjoy my life.
Remember when Star Trek fans and Star Wars fans had a friendly rivalry? Back when we could have debates over whether Kirk or Luke was a better character? Or whether the Millennium Falcon or USS Enterprise was more iconic? Now both fan bases are just depressed. I hate Disney and Paramount.
@@patriciaa65 You could say the same for GoT and LOTR on the Fantasy side, or Marvel vs. DC (i.e. The Boys, etc.) on the superhero side. And that's not even mentioning Dr. Who. Plus Warhammer vs. DnD. Everything has been butchered - possibly intentionally.
@@Jackaljkljkl It was semi-intentionally. They wanted to replace the core audiences by telling them to fuck off or submit, all in favor of the "modern audience" they never found. It destroyed the Franchises completely. Now, they cannot even go back anymore, because they burned all the bridges. It´s a mess, and very likely it can´t be fixed, ever.
@@PandaPanda-ud4ne My opinion is that the owners of these franchises didn't want them to be destroyed, but activists incorrectly convinced them that this kind of content/audience is the future (the jury is out on whether the activists themselves believed this). By the time the bigwigs realised that they had been duped, it was too late and the activists had moved onto the next franchise to hollow-out.
I have been a Trek fan since I watch the first episode on TV in 1966. How in hell can you have one of the top box office actors in the lead, a team of experienced writers, an unlimited budget and a distribution deal with Paramount and STILL produce something so awful! Producers should be SUED for this ungodly piece of crap.
I had never watched the animated series before watching "The Last Airbender", but I actually liked that movie. In fact, I've seen it several times. I personally think M. Night did a great job. There are thousands of movies I'd consider worse than The Last Airbender for sure.
@ I agree! When I saw that this movie was on the list of worst movies ever made I was baffled. Special effects were very good. Acting was fine. Plot was entertaining. And...the ending was as it should be. Idk, I know I'm a big M. Night fan but the criticism just confuses me. That's the other thing...the criticism of M. Night. Maybe not each and every one of his movies are on the level of The Sixth Sense, but I haven't seen a movie he's made that I didn't like. A few were far better than others but I wouldn't say any of his movies are aweful. His daughter did very well with Trap also.
My favorite aspects of secret agents? 1: Everyone knows who they are 2: They do nothing to to remain hidden 3: They blow up everything and leave bodies everywhere 4: They spend all of their time hanging out in bars
Considering SkyDance - which is the company that suggested JJ and Kurtzman to reboot Star Trek in the first place - now owns the Star Trek IP, I suspect we've a ways to go before we reach Rock Bottom...
The entire point of Section 31 is that they are supposed to be slick and so far behind the scenes that no one even knows that they exist until the Romulan Warbird mysteriously explodes, and even then they're so good that still no one knows they exist. They don't do flashy, they don't do open combat. Their sole reason for existing is to protect the Federation in ways the Federation charter doesn't allow. The film should have been a rogue spy type flick. Section 31 approaches a skilled Starfleet officer and tries to recruit them. Said officer refuses and tries to expose the group but like with Bashir in DS9, no record of a Section 31 exists. Then something terrible happens, Section 31 approaches the officer again to make the same offer and this time they say yes. They get inexplicably transferred and are sent on some very important mission to save the Federation, likely with another Section 31 agent who is all for the cause. It would explore the moral issues of the officer having to break all of Starfleet and the Federation's rules in order to save the Federation, and eventually end with the realization that for all the good and honorable stuff that the Federation does in the light, there has to be someone standing in the dark fending off the monsters that the rules won't let the Federation fight. Section 31.
With Section 31, Star Trek has now become fully indistinguishable from Star Wars. What was once a thoughtful, philosophical view of a better, more optimistic future society has now become a dark, dystopian and cynical future, mired in violence for the sake of violence. RIP Star Trek (1966-2005).
well said. last 10 yrs going down fast started with Discovery later seasons to Picard to now this! I can't watch this no more! I am a fan since 1979, better believe it. Ultimately this is all Borg doing, hive mentality and annihilation of everything that was good and individual
@@outlawedTV88 Im also an old fan. Im happy with my old ST collection. I no longer need any of this New Trek. Its all trash. ST ended with Captain Archer in 2005. Thats it. The story is told.
@@axelhopfinger533 Well, on the subject of Hell, it is on record that they did use some footage from Event Horizon in a Star Trek Voyager episode once (not *that* footage, though!).
There's a whole episode of TNG where Ro and Geordie get phased and are out of sync with everyone else. Fairly famous episode that most actual Trek fans would know about.
This is kind of true, but it was accidental, not a weapon. They were basically ghosts, and couldn't really interact with anything (or extremely limited). Here it was used as a weapon, everyone around them could see them.
Yes, but Star Trek in those days had character-driven stories that helped suspend your disbelief. The interaction between Geordi and Ro, their fears and despair, was the story. Now, it's just a plot device-and that means it needs to be believable.
Strange new worlds is the closest thing we've gotten, it has a few episodes I would even call good. But then there's also the weird ones that are downright unwatchable - no one asked for a musical episode with k-pop klingons.
@@estherbosbach377 I barely got through the one where music was a form of communication earlier on in the series. The musical one I stopped watching a few minutes in, the whole premise of the episode was dumb - suddenly the whole universe starts communicating exclusively in the form of musicals? Plotwise that was already a hard pill to swallow add to that my distaste of musicals in general and I skipped it. There was another episode I skipped as well but I forgot what it was even about. The Gorn episodes however were great. It even gave me hope for there to be a menacing enemy again. The Picard series sadly ruined the Borg for me.
@@Axeiaa It was silly but I enjoyed it for what it was. But man was that season a case of dramatic whiplash - first comedy, then terrible war crimes, then a musical episode, then gorn horror
Star Trek DEI: The Virtue Signal I got 15 minutes into it and turned this sad excuse for a movie off. Is Kathleen Kennedy working at Paramount, too? Not blaming actors, Yeoh is a treasure.. writing was mind numbingly idiotic.
"You've hit rockbottom here." I'm not sure, but I get the impression that these studios and directors are always looking for new ways to dig deeper holes.
Well, on the bright side, we are witnessing in real time through our OWN EYES , events that will be researched, dissected, and analyzed in required case studies in business programs 50 years from now: How Disney and Paramount destroyed two of the most valuable and entrenched franchises in entertainment history through their hubris, righteousness and total unwillingness to listen/react to ACTUAL customers in their fan base.
Drinker, thank you so much for actually watching this for us. No freaking way I'm going to give it a chance. Couldn't be a better summary, really hope Paramount starts listening to their fans.
I really dislike this scattergun approach they have taken to Star Trek and Star Wars IP ... like they are firing wildly with projects and series just hoping one will hit... its depressing they do not build strong characters, interesting stories, discover new worlds and journey into the unknown.... now its kungfu in space as Star Trek...
@karmabob42 " CRINGE is huge for all the misogynistic references. " I think "misogynistic" means to me very different than it means to you. I detected no *hate of women* in the original Star Trek.
Exactly. I dont even know what kind of person is watching any of these new trash shows? How do they look like? Chained on a bed inside an asylum to watch this trash 24 hours?
@@sufyanlowel4631 Are you seriously comparing this dumpster fire to The Godfather and Scarface? That’s disrespectful to actual masterpieces. They threw the Star Trek name on this trash to con people into watching, and it’s pathetic. Should’ve just called it Section 31 and saved us all the cringe. This show’s a slap in the face to everything the franchise ever stood for. Absolute garbage
@@omrilapidot6770 Writers are just too scared to have one main central setting where events and consequences matter. If they ever get backlash it can now just always be excused that it's a alternate universe/timeline to justify its canon breaking bs. Same reason superhero comics are in the decline for many characters. Why do they matter if the writers can just go "nah" at any point?
'Parallel universe' - for the lazy writers who don't want to actually say 'I reject your reality and substitute my own'. If you don't want to work with the cannon lore, write your own story in it's own world.
The parallel universe episodes of any of the series are easily my least favorite. I'm sure they were fun to make being different cast roles, but they don't matter.
I was called "The 'Star Trek guy' in school back in the 90s" I never would have believed that one day a Star Trek film would come out that I refuse to watch...
@@NurWahrheiten Ya I remember even reading some TNG novels.. but nowadays I couldn’t be bothered to even care what “section 31” means, never mind watch any nu-trek
@merccat67 imagining it has nothing to do with Star Trek is actually remarkably easy. Because, well, it really doesn't have much to do with Star trek. I mean, it has a Vulcan. Sort of. With a thick Irish accent for no particular reason.That really is about it.
That would be a great plot for a funny heist movie. The big twist at the end is that the leader recruited the entirely wrong team and pulled off the whole movie with a bunch of schlubs.
@@AbsentMinded619 Actually I think that is the plot to "Crazy Stone" directed by Ning Hao in 2006. It's in Chinese and can be hard to follow the first time you watch it but it is insane and funny.
Dear Drinker, Thank you for your service! From the bottom of my rotten cold stone heart. Thank you for having to watch this disgusting crap so I didn't have to. You have done everyone here a huge solid favour.
The one story no Hollywood actor or actress will ever want to miss out on is the one about a check in their name with an arbitrary number of zeros after the first digit.
Bless you Drinker. You literally couldn't pay me to watch this movie, but I take morbid pleasure watching your critique. Thank God I have OG Trek on DVD.
Excuse me I've been watching Star Trek my entire life so when you people get out here and say that this one movie is responsible for ripping up the timeline I call b*******have you never watched Discovery with her hour and a half preaching or have you never watched strange new worlds where they completely tanked Vulcan society and customs in order to make way for Spock to have an affair with a woman that he hadn't even seen his whole life it was made absolutely clear in the very first time and the only time the Vulcan mating was ever mentioned in the real Star Trek universe guess what spark with joined as a child to to bring and hadn't seen her their whole lives and now in strange new worlds their best friends they're in love and they're sleeping together when it's absolutely clear that Vulcans do not engage in casual sex even with their marriage partners you have completely stuck your foot in your mouth everyone's complained about this movie is that somehow they messed up this mirror mirror person and it doesn't make any difference because you've already torn up the entire Star Trek universe ever since everyone ever since everybody else decided to put in there two cents it's got worse and worse and worse and you need to just crawl back in your bottle and stay there and keep your opinions to yourself just like every other drunk in the world
The "creators" have stressed with great delight that this is nothing like any Star Trek you ever saw. That's not the desire most of us have for the franchise, to make it utterly unrecognizable.
"Nothing like any Star Trek you ever saw" A: just like every serving of slop since STD was shat onto our screens. B: not exactly the best marketing line if you're trying to entice back fans that have checked out. We've had years of "not like Star Trek." I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that we're ready to go back to the way it was.
@@NinjaFlibble Imagine a restaurant departing wildly from expectations with every menu item. That would surely be a huge success. Or not. I'll have some of that salmon ice cream in preference to watching Section 31.
I don't even thought they should've made Enterprise back then,I was burned out on trek after Voyager ended.I only watched Enterprise because I thought that was what trek fans should do.I thought Enterprise was pretty bland and boring,I didn't care for any of the characters either.
Michelle Yeoh, like Martin Freeman is one of those actors I simply cannot understand what people see in her. They are so bland and basically awful actors.
That "Go away, nowwrrrrr" was very cathartic xD It communicates exquisitely my personal disappointment in everything Trek recently. I am not a Humanist in any sense, but it was the Humanist fantasy of the Star Trek universe that made Star Trek... well... Star Trek. Without it, it's just another science fiction show, and a damn hollow one at that. Star Trek won't be Star Trek until someone can bring back the optimistic Humanism and professional tact that made it so magical and compelling in the first place.
Yeah the fact others have been able to do so much better proves the industry CAN make good decisions, they just choose not to. The Orville was a nice surprise for me, as was The Expanse. We have options, just not very good ones.
I remember when the dumbest thing in Star Trek was defeating a swarm of drones by blaring the Beastie Boys at full volume. How is it possible they got dumber?
I was willing to excuse that because they explained that the song in universe was just window-dressing and the frequency that it was being played at was the real weapon. Problem is how did a Beasty Boys album even in digital form survive 400 years into the future nuclear wars and all?
I think I figured it out. Someone was dumpster diving behind Marvel studio and found a rejected script. They changed the name to Star Trek and sold it to Paramount.
Star Trek and Fans at Tanagra. Paramount+ their arms wide. Discovery, Picard, Lower Decks, Prodigy, Lower Decks, Section 31 when the walls fell. Fans, their face black, their eyes red. Fans alone on the ocean.
It was never cool. It's the antithesis of trek. Trek was about escape from rule by the cudgel, rule by corruption. People after Roddenberry kept polluting the vision to be more and more mafia-style misery.
Michelle Yeoh, an otherwise world class actress, really ought to have a talk with her agent about the recent highs and lows of career. How does one go from Everything Everywhere All At Once, to Witcher: Blood Origin, to Wicked, to Section 31? Good lord lmao
Well, I think she has a work ethic established way back when in her early martial-arts-flick years where number of movies rather than quality determined your status and income.
To be fair, Wicked has been well received, even by the Drinker, and fared well at the box office. I don't care for whatshername who plays Elphaba, since she's a) ugly, and b) she found time to make a "how dare you" fake racist moment out of a fan's innocent, well-intended poster Photoshop. But the film was a hit.
Your closing rant really struck a chord with me, not just in relation to the current state of Trek, but it also has parallels with the Alien franchise, just substitute Kurtzman for Ridley Scott (god, I wish I could forget the last 12 years of his Alien 'content')
Fans-“It’s dead" Bad Robot-"We can still use it" Fans-“It’s dead!" Bad Robot- "The flesh is rotting but it still manageable for display and puppeteering" Fans-“It’s dead!!" Bad Robot- "The skeleton can be reused" Fans-“Stop. It’s already dead!!!"
I tend to agree. All the temporal stuff really kind of started there and, as much as I kind of tolerated Enterprise, the temporal stuff warped things there too.
@indiajohnson Enterprise got really good by the time they dropped the temporal cold war crap. It may not be perfect but it is a million times better than modern trek
@@richyrich7260 I've always been of the thought that some of what season 4 was should've been the blueprint/template for that show instead of what we got for the first 3 seasons.
True but Archer was so boring and so drab. The other two were very dull as well. And the uniforms just made it look like it was filmed in a plumbing academy.
Is that pointy eared dude supposed to be a Vulcan? It feels like another Rings of Power situation where they stuck pointy ears on a human and forgot everything that makes that race who they are.
I feel you ... There’s one thing I just can’t stand anymore: ornamental decorations [often in gold] on uniforms and armor. It is an indicator of exactly that. Whether it’s Star Trek, Star Wars, or anything else, everything feels like a bland mix of skintight, oversexualized, choreographed, narcissistic designs. Add to that stuntman action where everyone is some kind of overpowered superhero, a bunch of characters with mental issues and special needs, and the rest is just boring video game aesthetics and random crap crammed into the frame.
@@SterileNeutrino Not necessarily. The Systems Alliance (Mass Effect) dress uniforms have quite a bit of gold, esp. on the shoulders and as piping. I think they qualify for "ornamental decorations" but not for the fascism part.
We already see their reaction, that's why Drinker and the rest are "toxic". Cause how dare someone tell the truth about these shitty excuses for movies. Just consume and don't think about it
Alex Kurtzman shouldn't even be put in charge of selecting his own eyeglasses frames, much less a beloved, storied, influential, culturally important intellectual property like _Star Trek._
All the points you raised here could also be applied to Star Trek Discovery. Hence why most of us quit Star Trek after the first few episodes of that show. It wasn't just bad Star Trek, it wasn't just bad scifi, it was bad "entertainment" altogether. Is it really surprising anyone that they're still pushing out this shit?
Who knew Hollywood would have so lost its way that Uwe Boll would be a visionary artist who created masterpieces on par with DaVinci by comparison with modern cinema. Comparatively, he was an absolute genius. He actually possesses filmmaking skills that Hollywood no longer has. 30 years ago it would've been unthinkable that his movies would be a level of cinematic quality orders of magnitude above the quality of cinema produced after 2010...
Section 31 in TV lore, was a shadow organization, not unlike the Tokugawa-era Ninja. They didn't stand out in a crowd and could be spies or assassins as needed. This movie turns canon upside down and makes Yet Another Dumpster Fire.
@@Otokichi786 Which indicates, YET AGAIN, that Kurtzman possess a fundamental lack of understanding and reverence for the source material he uses to make his "projects".
I gave the train wreck known as "ST Discovery" a fair chance, but turned it off halfway through the premiere episode, haven't watched since. I gave your review almost 4 minutes before turning it off. You saved me from wasting maybe 30 minutes of my life! I thank you!!
Snap! I got about halfway thru the 1st episode before turning STD off: figured my TV was at serious risk of succumbing to violence from my foot. It was totally absurd and scientifically illiterate from the start.
I enjoyed Discovery for what it was. Not bad. Not great. Something to watch while I waited for more Strange New Worlds or Lower Decks. And some of the characters were interesting. Until season 5. I have rarely seen a show faceplant as badly as it did. My wife and I were both shouting at the screen on several occasions, and Burnham has dropped to my least favorite captain - a human raised on Vulcan who only thinks with her emotions? What could possibly go wrong? I see why Lower Decks relegated Discovery to an alternate, non-cannon reality.
Remember when studio's enjoyed making money and hired good writers to write good stories? Huh, it seems so long ago. My son is 7 now. We've been watching all the old classics. ET, Harry and the Hendersons, Star War 4-6. His favourite movie is the first Sam Rami Spider-Man. Dada's so proud!
@jesterday2222 Yes, yes! We watched the Goonies very recently. I forgot how many swear words are in it! You get sensitive to that stuff when you've got kids! But, we'd recently gone through a whole thing about that at home, so it wasn't a problem. Besides that, fantastic film. I've got Neverending Story on the back burner. He's a bit sensitive to scary stuff, and that wolf is a bit much! But, maybe I'm being over cautious?! We did Short Circuit, Flight of the Navigator, the Chronicles of Narnia movies, Toy Story, and more. He does swimming and kickboxing, btw, it's not all movies, lol. Don't want to sound like we spend everyday indoors! There are so many great kids films from the 80's and 90's. It's important to see them early because some of the special effects are a bit rough, but your imagination fills in the blanks when you're a kid. It's wonderful to watch them again through their eyes. I have a 4 year old girl and a 7 month old boy as well. My daughter joins us for the ones that are OK for her to watch, and I get to do it all again with little Teddy when he gets older. Any more movie suggestions, then please let me know! It's difficult to remember them all, and I don't want to miss something important. Oh, his favourite Star Wars was Empire! Kids got good taste already! My daughter's was ROTJ, but that's because she liked the Ewoks. She'll learn, she's only 4.
It’s the same with Dr Who. Classic Who used to be about defeating monster of the week. With modern Who every story has the fate of the entire universe at risk. It’s such overblown bs.
The shonen power escalation problem. This villain was so strong but this new villain is so much stronger despite the fact that the scope and scale of such a threat will appear the exact same if not weaker than the last or is incomprehensible to the audience.
@@sigmacademy It makes you wonder why an enemy with that kind of power isn't already ruling most of the known universe if destroying the federation is easy to them? The Dominion required three major galactic powers and many smaller ones, their supply chain for reinforcements cut off, and their leadership dying to beat. How could you ever possibly top that in terms of scale in a way that's satisfying and not a a$*pull?
Your review is spot on. I can't believe someone wrote the script for this garbage movie. How much money did Paramount throw away on this? It's so boring and stupid I had to take a break and finish it another night.
“It’s dead, Jim.”
Darnit! Beat me to it! So I will content myself with a KURTZMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
It's worse than that!
Shit's* dead, Jim.
Damn it Jim I'm a drama critic not a doctor
I'm a doctor, not a miracle worker.
Star Trek 1966 made me want to be an engineer (and I did). Star Trek Section 31 made me want to have a lobotomy.
Don't go for the lobotomy. While you'll leave happy, the drool is a problem that never goes away.
lmao
(and U did) 😄
So did you? Have the lobotomy, I mean? Personally, I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. YMMV. ;)
And the 60s were the golden age for those
The showrunners described it as "Guardians of the Galaxy on steroids."
How come you can't just make Star Trek on Star Trek?
Who now would describe their movie or show as "Star Trek meets [literally anything]"? The Orville was the best Star Trek between Voyager and Picard S3 and Unification.
More like GotG with hemorrhoids
Guardians of the Galaxy is the Dark Souls of movie pitches.
It's not guardians of the galaxy on steroids, unless by that they mean sickly, with an overinflated ego.
It's terrible how most new sci-fi movies try to copy GoG, just like fantasy tv series imitate Game of Thrones.
Star Trek used to be a platform for stories about higher morals and values, it was about the building of trust, and teamwork amongst a crew alone in the void. Now it’s become just another revenue stream built on the back of once great scifi.
Section 31 is exactly about trust and teamwork and redemption
When IGN gives your product a 2/10, you done fucked up!
The check must've bounced
@@Lokhir100,
Yep, sounds about right.
@@Lokhir100 based
Facts
Maybe IGN gets honest finally...
don't think i've ever heard the drinker sound so personally offended by a movie
I thought so too 😂
Rings of Power ...
💯
I know right, his rants and imagery are top-tier here 👌 I love it
His standard "Go away now" became a death metal plea.
Anyone remember when Star Trek was smart? I miss that...
Does anyone remember when Starfleet had a military like chain of command and discipline?
I miss those days.
Remember when Star Trek had heightened dialogue, amazing actors and well written stories.... Alas
Why I have ST originals and TNG on Blu Ray.
TOS only…..
@@easyalpha1 those old scientists
When I read Section 31 was WORSE than Star Trek V… I knew I would want to stay far, far away 😬
It feels like a bad joke
"Fecal encrusted bedrock" is how MTFers describe their post-op wounds
Section 31 makes Star Trek 5 look like Star Trek 4 in comparison.
Nah, Star Trek V is a lot of fun, it's like a tribute to the original T.V show vibe, and the memorable quotes are fun, too.
"Why does God need a Starship?"
Like so many things, it's trendy to hate The Final Frontier and no other opinion is allowed.
1. I haven't seen Section 31, but I have no difficulty believing that it's just awful, like all modern Trek.
2. Go back and watch V again, but treat it like you're watching a long episode of TOS instead of a movie with the TOS cast. I would be shocked if you didn't end up reevaluating.
This is Star Trek’s Acolyte.
nuTrek is Star Trek's Acolyte.
I'm sorry but disco was star treks acolyte.
Worse than Star Wars Acolyte...by miles...and Acolyte was garbage.
So, an obituary.
So was STD, Star Woke, this is daughter of Star Woke.
Disney: "We make the most vomit-inducing crap in the universe!!!!"
Paramount: "Hold my Romulan Ale..."
should have stayed on andorian ale
@delluminatis Absolutely!!!🤣
The heterophobic mob always makes sh*t.
Star Wars Christmas Special, "Thank god I'm not the worst franchise creation anymore!"
Jimmy Carter, "Like I'm thankful for Biden!"
HAHAHAHA brilliant.
Are you tellin me that a show that has a poster of an aging woman looking boss girl with her foot on a guy on the ground is generic and predictable slop?
I thought you were joking but its real, what are these execs and creators thinking anymore
What?! *surprised pikachu face*
@@elitely6748Thinking appears to be out of fashion.
I can't wait to play as a middle aged girl boss in the Witcher 4 who completely shatters the lore (and glass ceiling).
Impossible. Perhaps the archives are incomplete...
My grandfather is a super Treky. But he saw that there was a new Star Trek movie. But he didn’t even make it 20 minutes in and turned it off. He got pissed off and turned on Deep Space Nine to cleanse his palette
“Slip into something more comfortable, like a coma”😂😂😂😂
Or Tatiana 😊
Can you imagine being a Star Trek/Star Wars fan falling into a coma 25 years ago, and waking up to THIS?
@@mvader7188 But of course he didn't say that, because his buzz was utterly killed.
@@All2MemeWaking up to current day Trek would convince anybody that the rest of the universe has slipped into a coma.
Gold fr
I grew up on TNG and DS9 …
Didn’t know how good I had it!
And even those two series were filled with all the woke talking points and imagery. Adjusted for inflation.
Go look at them again now that you have some "antibodies", if you do not believe me.
@@baswenmakers6846but the progressiveness was subtle. You were led to it, it wasn’t slammed in your face at every opportunity.
@@baswenmakers6846 "antibodies" that's some funny shit! I'm a big trek fan and i agree with you. some of the decisions that they made were bad progressive. ex: picard should have been relieved of duty for not sending that borg geordie befriended back to the borg collective carrying the virus to destroy them.
@@baswenmakers6846 I have rewatched quite a bit of TNG and DS9 in the last couple of years and I don’t agree
I bet you I’ve cycled through more bad episodes of TNG and DS9 than new trek. EDIT: That was totally not what I mean, I mean, I watch more of those episodes than I do new trek.
When are these people gonna figure out that Star Trek isn't an action series? It was written for people who wanted to think about their stories not be distracted by endless fights. That's why the Kelvin timeline didn't really go that well. Star Trek is science fiction not a space opera. It's meant to explore interesting questions about how we would relate to new species and new cultures.
Sure there's some action but it's meant to serve as a plot device not be the crux of the story.
Because thinking's overrated! Obvs. Got with the program, boomer!
But that Logic of Spock could be a like Dao Monk or something trying to master you can sort of relate it, now a boomer is my mother or father who are the boomers in this movie ?
I would ad moral dilemmas.
Star Trek was always a Morality Play, with lessons on how to be better. They lost that thread when JJ Abrams took over...
All this. They're too focused on trying to make a low budget Star Wars movie with "Trek" characters these days, and they're losing sight of the fact that story was always the main focus for Trek.
Star Trek has been dead for a while and, like Pet Cemetery showed us, the revived beast is never going to be the same.
LMFAO ... That growl at the end of the NOW in your "Go away now", sounded like a deep gutteral burp snuck out at the end just to say Hi.
How in gods name does Alex Kurtzman still have a job? Not a job in Hollywood, a job. He has singlehandedly compromised Star Trek in a way that JJ Abrams never imagined possible.
Because: Wikipedia, Early Life. (Same with JJ.)
he's from the right tribe, which invented "woke" (Frankfurt school)
I heard that he is the ultimate ass kisser. He will say yes to everyone's ideas even if it makes the show a jumbled mess . He keeps being brought back because they know he is a pushover who will allow them to insert their ideas into the show. Ends up with too many cooks in the kitchen and no real head chef to keep them on track.
Because holwould is rotten to begin with and the corporate culture allows certain failures to get away with it!
@@sd7335 They didn't invent "woke", they just copied the homework of that Italian guy, Gramsci, and slapped a new name on it.
Then they moved to the US and took "their" idea with them, like most successful "startups" in the US.
This is rock bottom.... so far. Never underestimate their ability to drill.
To boldly go to rock bottoms no one has gone before
If they have to use fecking dynamite to go further down they will!
I think Paramount takes everyone calling them rock bottom as a personal challenge to fail harder...
The writers of Star Trek will improve excavation technology so that they can go deeper than any man has gone before.
DRILL BABY DRILL
Paramount and Disney have two things in common:
(1) They are both utterly impervious to learning from their mistakes.
(2) They blame their mistakes on the fans, criticize the fans for not liking their mistakes, and then double down on making even more mistakes.
In Science, it's called a "positive feedback loop". In society, it's called, "WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU???"
Or, maybe look at the people who own and run both, and see what they might have in common,...perhaps via the 'Wikipedia, Early Life' tool...?
It's Ego
If you grew up getting everything you want without having to suffer any consequences from your actions, you'll believe you're always right
There is a reason why very VERY few biological processes are based on a positive feedback loop.
Evolution weeded out most aside from pregnancy.
In biology, living in a bubble works for the very brief time until something outside of the bubble comes in, bursts it and eats/destroys everything in it.
Something which the entertainment industry has been finding out for the last decade.
At least Paramount allows Taylor Sheridan to do his thing.
AS a kid in the 70's, all there was was TOS. And it was glorious. Every episode made you think, made you curious, made you feel both entertained and satisfied. Later, we got TNG, and it was similar; much more polished, but still a thinking person's TV show. The problem now is that the people writing and making these shows and movies stopped developing emotionally as 14 year olds, and they are writing for people who are trapped in adult adolescence. We don't want fights and explosions; we want STORIES, well told and acted.
Star Trek and Dr Who were two of my favorite shows growing up. Now look at them. I no longer have the interest to even hate what it's become.
When I was a kid in the 80's, I'd stay up until 3am to watch Dr.Who (Baker-era) on my local PBS affiliate. Now, I can't even be bothered to watch how the BBC has defiled that legacy. All I know is that they've made it clear people like me aren't welcome in their weird little club. OK. Bye. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
To be fair, Doc Who was always a bit shite.
@@TheJohn8765 It really added to the Doctor Who experience as a kid. Staying up till 2am and watching a random episode, passing out as soon as it got to the opening theme. Waking up 20 min later when some green trashbag with eyes screaming and the synth blaring. Those were the days.
Doctor who died after capaldi left
Did you like Trek in the 90s? Did you like DW in the 00s? Then you're the one than changed. Both have been trash for decades.
"Does anyone remember when we used to be explorers?"
-- Literally Picard.
now they are exploring the bottom of the toilet in star trek.
Capt Literally, is that you?
Can you imagine the mirth that line generated with Kurtzy and his jesters, from the inception of the script, through to the final screening rooms? Little boys, playing with expensive toys, giddy, like the vermin who graffiti over ancient ruins. It's nothing less.
Yikes, ya, that was one of the best things about star trek, seeing what’s out there, or at least an imagined idea of what’s out there.
Make it snow!
I thought Star Trek already hit rock bottom, but it always seems to find new ways to drill down further into the abyss.
Going where no man has gone before
They WANT the lake of fire. 🤷🏼♂️
Don't be so mean! They're just trying to compete with the Kola borehole.
In a world of infinite parallel universes, there's an infinite number of rock bottoms to reach.
Perhaps they stole that idea from the Satanist faction from the METRO series. Who knows? Multiverse-y, timey wimey.
The ‘Oirish’ accent on the flee / Vulcan robot guy was the worst…. Jesus, I can’t believe they made this. The over acting, the awful inter character banter, the stupid plot, the rubbish flash back scene….. no joke I started to fall asleep near the end.
Absolutely with you on the horrid accents. And the flashback is ridiculously idiotic. She won a Hunger Games kid contest and suddenly became emperor of the universe? No military training, political experience, or bloody rampage to the top? Was there a current emperor? Why were they being replaced? And of course the scorned love interest comes back as the mysterious latex gimp sub.
My headcanon is that, yes, this is a parody. At least that way it's all somewhat amusing as a light-hearted criticism of Star Trek seriousness.
See's pointy eared Irish Romulan in Piccard... Hmmm
Those 6min saved me from wasting 90min of my life. Thanks
Drinker should be listed in financial advice videos. The amount of time I've saved not watching dogshit movies and instead been more productive has been better than any "how to invest your savings" guide.
Consider yourself lucky. It's hard to find enough superlatives to do justice to how F'ing terrible this turd is.
I watched it, he’s not joking it’s terrible. I was literally falling asleep near the end. The characters are the most unlikeable bunch I’ve ever seen in a a movie, the dialogue was so bad I laughed at one point at how utterly fake it was. Plot was a nothing, whole movie was one of the worst movies I’ve EVER seen - it’s that bad.
@karmabob42 I don't miss what I don't enjoy.
I wouldn't waste the little time I have on earth to "understand" an obscure reference.
I just move on & enjoy my life.
Remember when Star Trek fans and Star Wars fans had a friendly rivalry? Back when we could have debates over whether Kirk or Luke was a better character? Or whether the Millennium Falcon or USS Enterprise was more iconic? Now both fan bases are just depressed. I hate Disney and Paramount.
“both fandoms are depressed”,
Yup that sums it up
@@patriciaa65 You could say the same for GoT and LOTR on the Fantasy side, or Marvel vs. DC (i.e. The Boys, etc.) on the superhero side.
And that's not even mentioning Dr. Who.
Plus Warhammer vs. DnD.
Everything has been butchered - possibly intentionally.
@@Jackaljkljkl It was semi-intentionally. They wanted to replace the core audiences by telling them to fuck off or submit, all in favor of the "modern audience" they never found. It destroyed the Franchises completely. Now, they cannot even go back anymore, because they burned all the bridges. It´s a mess, and very likely it can´t be fixed, ever.
@@PandaPanda-ud4ne My opinion is that the owners of these franchises didn't want them to be destroyed, but activists incorrectly convinced them that this kind of content/audience is the future (the jury is out on whether the activists themselves believed this).
By the time the bigwigs realised that they had been duped, it was too late and the activists had moved onto the next franchise to hollow-out.
@@Jackaljkljkl I gave up on Dr Who after (really during) Matt whatshisname.
When I'm more excited for Drinkers review than the movie itself....
I have been a Trek fan since I watch the first episode on TV in 1966. How in hell can you have one of the top box office actors in the lead, a team of experienced writers, an unlimited budget and a distribution deal with Paramount and STILL produce something so awful! Producers should be SUED for this ungodly piece of crap.
Its because its part of the 'discovery' time line which lower decks happily remedies as part of a different universe.
The production values on this show were horrendous
I did some work on "Avatar: The Last Airbender," which was declared the worst movie of all time. Thankfully, this movie has cured my shame.
I had never watched the animated series before watching "The Last Airbender", but I actually liked that movie. In fact, I've seen it several times. I personally think M. Night did a great job. There are thousands of movies I'd consider worse than The Last Airbender for sure.
I happen to enjoy Avatar: The Last Airbender. The story was good and the special effects spectacular. It was also a refreshingly different story.
@ I agree! When I saw that this movie was on the list of worst movies ever made I was baffled. Special effects were very good. Acting was fine. Plot was entertaining. And...the ending was as it should be. Idk, I know I'm a big M. Night fan but the criticism just confuses me. That's the other thing...the criticism of M. Night. Maybe not each and every one of his movies are on the level of The Sixth Sense, but I haven't seen a movie he's made that I didn't like. A few were far better than others but I wouldn't say any of his movies are aweful. His daughter did very well with Trap also.
It shouldn't. A sh*t sandwich is still a sh*t sandwich even if someone else made another sh*t sandwich that also used sh*t for bread.
You're just gonna walk in here and admit that? Brave soul.
My favorite aspects of secret agents?
1: Everyone knows who they are
2: They do nothing to to remain hidden
3: They blow up everything and leave bodies everywhere
4: They spend all of their time hanging out in bars
That's how life as an agent really is.
You described Sterling Archer
Describes James Bond as well
Yeah, but secretly.
Reminds me of the old western show "Wild Wild West"
...everyone knew who the "secret service" agent named James West before he arrived.
"Little did Drinker know, rock bottom had in fact... NOT been reached"
They will soon discover an even rockier bottom that science had previously thought impossible.
@@andrewbakescakes9684bedrock bottom?
Because the studios and activists will just keep on digging.
@@twandepanBlackrock bottom
You nailed it! The first episode of STD i watched, i said to myself "WTF this is not Star Trek!".
Considering SkyDance - which is the company that suggested JJ and Kurtzman to reboot Star Trek in the first place - now owns the Star Trek IP, I suspect we've a ways to go before we reach Rock Bottom...
Nah we have hit rock bottom they just have pickaxes
But nobody will notice anymore.
Drill, baby, drill. They'll keep going with "dark" and "action-driven" for a while yet.
Why are we still here?...Just to suffer?
No they have more holes to dig. No one is watching this crap.
I've been in apathy mode with Star Trek since 2005. They wanted the actual fans to leave, so we all left. Good riddance to crap franchises
Star Trek Discovery was very good, at least regarding the quality of my sleep ...
They're trying to pull a full Disney on it, but unlike Star Wars, Trek wasn't aimed squarely at kids.
Maybe they can bring back Babylon 5 and run that into the ground.
@@felixcosty No please dont
@@sebc8938 you had us in the first half
"Who can't even manage Starbucks let alone star trek." had me rolling on the floor!!
Have you tried Ritalin
why hasn't Trump appointed them to his cabinet yet?
@@deadtoadsoupNo , see he's only appointing good people, not make believe alphabet dei people
@@deadtoadsoup , where have you been the past 4 years?
@ mocking the uneducated MAGA cult and their disinformation, Comrade.
The entire point of Section 31 is that they are supposed to be slick and so far behind the scenes that no one even knows that they exist until the Romulan Warbird mysteriously explodes, and even then they're so good that still no one knows they exist. They don't do flashy, they don't do open combat. Their sole reason for existing is to protect the Federation in ways the Federation charter doesn't allow.
The film should have been a rogue spy type flick. Section 31 approaches a skilled Starfleet officer and tries to recruit them. Said officer refuses and tries to expose the group but like with Bashir in DS9, no record of a Section 31 exists. Then something terrible happens, Section 31 approaches the officer again to make the same offer and this time they say yes. They get inexplicably transferred and are sent on some very important mission to save the Federation, likely with another Section 31 agent who is all for the cause. It would explore the moral issues of the officer having to break all of Starfleet and the Federation's rules in order to save the Federation, and eventually end with the realization that for all the good and honorable stuff that the Federation does in the light, there has to be someone standing in the dark fending off the monsters that the rules won't let the Federation fight. Section 31.
With Section 31, Star Trek has now become fully indistinguishable from Star Wars. What was once a thoughtful, philosophical view of a better, more optimistic future society has now become a dark, dystopian and cynical future, mired in violence for the sake of violence. RIP Star Trek (1966-2005).
That sounds pretty cool actually
Well said!! 👍
well said. last 10 yrs going down fast started with Discovery later seasons to Picard to now this! I can't watch this no more! I am a fan since 1979, better believe it. Ultimately this is all Borg doing, hive mentality and annihilation of everything that was good and individual
@@outlawedTV88 Im also an old fan. Im happy with my old ST collection. I no longer need any of this New Trek. Its all trash. ST ended with Captain Archer in 2005. Thats it. The story is told.
@ Yup, agreed, every few yrs I replay all the old Star Trek series and movies and the difference between those old and today is abysmal
The granny analogy made me laugh. And I'm currently depressed and nothing made me laugh for weeks. Thank you!
Watch some TOS, TNG or Orville and maybe it will improve your mood.
I wish you lot's of health.
@inquerion8867 Thank you. I recently rewatched TOS and some of the old movies. My mood die not change, but it kept me distracted.
Same reaction when I've just watched "Back to the Future Part II" from Pitch Meeting.
You says this rock bottom for Star Trek, Alex kurtzman will show you can digger deeper into obscurity.
Yes, there's the danger this turns into "Challenge accepted!"
Kurtzman won't rest until he has dug Star Trek into the deepest, darkest pits of streaming slop hell.
"There's always a bigger hole,"
@@axelhopfinger533 Well, on the subject of Hell, it is on record that they did use some footage from Event Horizon in a Star Trek Voyager episode once (not *that* footage, though!).
There's a whole episode of TNG where Ro and Geordie get phased and are out of sync with everyone else. Fairly famous episode that most actual Trek fans would know about.
This is kind of true, but it was accidental, not a weapon. They were basically ghosts, and couldn't really interact with anything (or extremely limited). Here it was used as a weapon, everyone around them could see them.
Yes, but Star Trek in those days had character-driven stories that helped suspend your disbelief. The interaction between Geordi and Ro, their fears and despair, was the story. Now, it's just a plot device-and that means it needs to be believable.
After the Borderlands movie, I thought we'd had enough femme fatales played by women far too old to be convincing.
To be fair this was green lit years ago probably during trumps first term
@@NeoakiraIV
They uh.
They still didn't look good a decade ago.
We still have a few more years left of crap like this.
@@NeoakiraIV do they know that aborting it was an option at any point during that process though?
@@NeoakiraIV Ok the trump blame, gotcha. Blame trump for woke rubbish, sounds totally legit.
"The only way out is up." I have a feeling that rock bottom can be even further down at this point.
Yeah, when I heard Drinker say that, I thought, "I'd be willing to bet on that. "
They've hit rock bottom and are starting to dig,
@@samuelayers3429 Yeah even they can't mess that up. or can they?
@@MegaBadgeman There are mining companies less committed to digging than this lot.
Sideways is also an option.
What I wouldn't give for an old fashion episodic 90's era Star Trek show with limited sets and a modest budget.
We have The Orville, well, kinda. If it's not cancelled yet, nobody really knows.
Strange new worlds is the closest thing we've gotten, it has a few episodes I would even call good. But then there's also the weird ones that are downright unwatchable - no one asked for a musical episode with k-pop klingons.
@@Axeiaa I really enjoyed the musical episode! The lyrics were smart
@@estherbosbach377 I barely got through the one where music was a form of communication earlier on in the series.
The musical one I stopped watching a few minutes in, the whole premise of the episode was dumb - suddenly the whole universe starts communicating exclusively in the form of musicals? Plotwise that was already a hard pill to swallow add to that my distaste of musicals in general and I skipped it. There was another episode I skipped as well but I forgot what it was even about.
The Gorn episodes however were great. It even gave me hope for there to be a menacing enemy again. The Picard series sadly ruined the Borg for me.
@@Axeiaa It was silly but I enjoyed it for what it was. But man was that season a case of dramatic whiplash - first comedy, then terrible war crimes, then a musical episode, then gorn horror
Star Trek DEI: The Virtue Signal
I got 15 minutes into it and turned this sad excuse for a movie off. Is Kathleen Kennedy working at Paramount, too?
Not blaming actors, Yeoh is a treasure.. writing was mind numbingly idiotic.
"You've hit rockbottom here." I'm not sure, but I get the impression that these studios and directors are always looking for new ways to dig deeper holes.
Yeah, we really cannot claim they are lacking creativity. 😑
Yep. This is Hollywood. They will keep digging to somehow, take it lower.
Well, on the bright side, we are witnessing in real time through our OWN EYES , events that will be researched, dissected, and analyzed in required case studies in business programs 50 years from now: How Disney and Paramount destroyed two of the most valuable and entrenched franchises in entertainment history through their hubris, righteousness and total unwillingness to listen/react to ACTUAL customers in their fan base.
If they dig any deeper, they may end up in f**king China!! 😒
That's how they carve out money for themselves. Overproduced overpriced ending up as a flop.
Drinker, thank you so much for actually watching this for us. No freaking way I'm going to give it a chance. Couldn't be a better summary, really hope Paramount starts listening to their fans.
Yup.
I really dislike this scattergun approach they have taken to Star Trek and Star Wars IP ... like they are firing wildly with projects and series just hoping one will hit... its depressing they do not build strong characters, interesting stories, discover new worlds and journey into the unknown.... now its kungfu in space as Star Trek...
@karmabob42 a lot more misses than hits though
@karmabob42 " CRINGE is huge for all the misogynistic references. "
I think "misogynistic" means to me very different than it means to you. I detected no *hate of women* in the original Star Trek.
It’s dead Jim.
I'm giving all she's got captain!
Its not just dead.... Its brain is gone!
Yes it is.
Star Trek always had a niche audience. Now they've went and thrown that away too - to appeal to no one.
Exactly. I dont even know what kind of person is watching any of these new trash shows? How do they look like? Chained on a bed inside an asylum to watch this trash 24 hours?
Well, I liked it very much
@@ranulf8477trash is all these movies about criminals like Godfather or Scarface
@@sufyanlowel4631 Are you seriously comparing this dumpster fire to The Godfather and Scarface? That’s disrespectful to actual masterpieces. They threw the Star Trek name on this trash to con people into watching, and it’s pathetic. Should’ve just called it Section 31 and saved us all the cringe. This show’s a slap in the face to everything the franchise ever stood for. Absolute garbage
@@Same-o9e yes. seriously. I regret wasting my time on Godfather and Scarface. And this show perfectly fit in franchise.
Review begins
"section 31 begins in a parallel universe"
And I'm out.
My mind automatically refuses to process "alternate universe", "parallel timeline" and all this modern, lazy crap.
Right? It was pretty cool like 20 years ago maybe. But it's an automatic pass now.
@@omrilapidot6770 Writers are just too scared to have one main central setting where events and consequences matter.
If they ever get backlash it can now just always be excused that it's a alternate universe/timeline to justify its canon breaking bs.
Same reason superhero comics are in the decline for many characters. Why do they matter if the writers can just go "nah" at any point?
'Parallel universe' - for the lazy writers who don't want to actually say 'I reject your reality and substitute my own'.
If you don't want to work with the cannon lore, write your own story in it's own world.
The parallel universe episodes of any of the series are easily my least favorite. I'm sure they were fun to make being different cast roles, but they don't matter.
I was called "The 'Star Trek guy' in school back in the 90s"
I never would have believed that one day a Star Trek film would come out that I refuse to watch...
Same here.
I don’t want to…. But *sigh* I probably will. Going to pretend it’s a generic scifi that has nothing to do with trek….
@@NurWahrheiten Ya I remember even reading some TNG novels.. but nowadays I couldn’t be bothered to even care what “section 31” means, never mind watch any nu-trek
I left the "new" Star Trek so long ago, that i did not even notice, that there is a new film until the youtube algorithmus remembered me.
@merccat67 imagining it has nothing to do with Star Trek is actually remarkably easy. Because, well, it really doesn't have much to do with Star trek. I mean, it has a Vulcan. Sort of. With a thick Irish accent for no particular reason.That really is about it.
Plot twist. Better agents also entered the bar but she couldn't spot them. She basically hand picked the worst of the worst.
LOL!
The other agents quietly sharing a drink on the side going 'Dodged a bullet there, guys'
That would be a great plot for a funny heist movie. The big twist at the end is that the leader recruited the entirely wrong team and pulled off the whole movie with a bunch of schlubs.
"Annual ninja parade slips through awaiting crowd unnoticed"
@@AbsentMinded619 Actually I think that is the plot to "Crazy Stone" directed by Ning Hao in 2006. It's in Chinese and can be hard to follow the first time you watch it but it is insane and funny.
Dear Drinker, Thank you for your service! From the bottom of my rotten cold stone heart. Thank you for having to watch this disgusting crap so I didn't have to. You have done everyone here a huge solid favour.
'You officially hit rock bottom, the only way now is up.'
Is that a challenge? Because they can and will always find a new bottom.
They will mine down-word; they will seek to dig to the core. They must not be tempted!
The showrunners: "Drill baby, drill!"
Yeah never say that to overpaid and under-talented people.
@@moozillamoo2109 its like telling a kid don’t touch something. Thats giving them a green light and permission to do just that.
The bar has been lowered so far.... only James Cameron can save us and the bar
Michelle Yeoh: no more karate movies. Star Trek: how about dumb stories with $$$$? Yeoh: 🖖🖖🖖
The one story no Hollywood actor or actress will ever want to miss out on is the one about a check in their name with an arbitrary number of zeros after the first digit.
Yeah, it seems like all Asian film stars lose their pride and acting ability as soon as they step into Hollywood.
I heard she got paid the same amount as the entire budget for Godzilla Minus One.
In the paraphrased words of Maximus - Roddenberry had a dream that was trek. This is not it. This is NOT it.
And I am definitely NOT entertained.
In 10 years this movie will be the headliner of MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000
Bless you Drinker. You literally couldn't pay me to watch this movie, but I take morbid pleasure watching your critique. Thank God I have OG Trek on DVD.
Excuse me I've been watching Star Trek my entire life so when you people get out here and say that this one movie is responsible for ripping up the timeline I call b*******have you never watched Discovery with her hour and a half preaching or have you never watched strange new worlds where they completely tanked Vulcan society and customs in order to make way for Spock to have an affair with a woman that he hadn't even seen his whole life it was made absolutely clear in the very first time and the only time the Vulcan mating was ever mentioned in the real Star Trek universe guess what spark with joined as a child to to bring and hadn't seen her their whole lives and now in strange new worlds their best friends they're in love and they're sleeping together when it's absolutely clear that Vulcans do not engage in casual sex even with their marriage partners you have completely stuck your foot in your mouth everyone's complained about this movie is that somehow they messed up this mirror mirror person and it doesn't make any difference because you've already torn up the entire Star Trek universe ever since everyone ever since everybody else decided to put in there two cents it's got worse and worse and worse and you need to just crawl back in your bottle and stay there and keep your opinions to yourself just like every other drunk in the world
The "creators" have stressed with great delight that this is nothing like any Star Trek you ever saw. That's not the desire most of us have for the franchise, to make it utterly unrecognizable.
It confuses me, just make new IP instead of paying billions to kill IP of the past.
@@lilacdoe7945 That simple and logical idea is more than they can comprehend. They think they're innovating. Dunning Kruger big time.
"Nothing like any Star Trek you ever saw"
A: just like every serving of slop since STD was shat onto our screens.
B: not exactly the best marketing line if you're trying to entice back fans that have checked out. We've had years of "not like Star Trek." I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that we're ready to go back to the way it was.
@@lilacdoe7945
Tolkien said it best "evil cannot create, it can only corrupt and destroy what good forces have made." (Paraphrased)
@@NinjaFlibble Imagine a restaurant departing wildly from expectations with every menu item. That would surely be a huge success. Or not. I'll have some of that salmon ice cream in preference to watching Section 31.
I say again. Star Trek ended with Enterprise.
And it was on life support even then.
@@tulinfirenze1990 You could say that, but it was a hundred times better than the slop they call Star Trek we have now.
@@0101_root Agreed.
I don't even thought they should've made Enterprise back then,I was burned out on trek after Voyager ended.I only watched Enterprise because I thought that was what trek fans should do.I thought Enterprise was pretty bland and boring,I didn't care for any of the characters either.
I honestly got bored with DS9 and Voyager. The entire IP quickly went downhill when it's creator no longer had control over it.
Michelle Yeoh, like Martin Freeman is one of those actors I simply cannot understand what people see in her. They are so bland and basically awful actors.
China.
The director of this also directed "Star Trek: Discovery" to glorious heights. My question is why would anyone continue to hire this man?
likely cuz he does what he is told, never exeeds funding, prolly is diverse on more that one level and so on... in other words: the perfect lackey
On the plus side, this seems to not be his worst movie given he directed The Cavern.
I like to imagine that the mountain in Paramount logo is Everest, only instead of the dead bodies, it's covered with dead IPs
I thought the Paramount mountain would rotate 180 degrees and be revealed as a giant poop emoji.
This is hilarious 😂
That "Go away, nowwrrrrr" was very cathartic xD
It communicates exquisitely my personal disappointment in everything Trek recently. I am not a Humanist in any sense, but it was the Humanist fantasy of the Star Trek universe that made Star Trek... well... Star Trek. Without it, it's just another science fiction show, and a damn hollow one at that.
Star Trek won't be Star Trek until someone can bring back the optimistic Humanism and professional tact that made it so magical and compelling in the first place.
Yeah the fact others have been able to do so much better proves the industry CAN make good decisions, they just choose not to.
The Orville was a nice surprise for me, as was The Expanse. We have options, just not very good ones.
5:15 Teal and orange. The laziest colour scheme out there.
Also, since when is Star Trek supposed to be "cape sh!t"?
I remember when the dumbest thing in Star Trek was defeating a swarm of drones by blaring the Beastie Boys at full volume. How is it possible they got dumber?
yeah but Beastie Boys, that was the best part..
This was actually worse than "Spock's Brain".
I was willing to excuse that because they explained that the song in universe was just window-dressing and the frequency that it was being played at was the real weapon. Problem is how did a Beasty Boys album even in digital form survive 400 years into the future nuclear wars and all?
@@WeirdTale The song's use was fan service for a particular minority group. It wasn't Trek in the slightest.
@@darrents44 You meant to type "most immature and puerile."
I think I figured it out. Someone was dumpster diving behind Marvel studio and found a rejected script. They changed the name to Star Trek and sold it to Paramount.
Or was it Battle Beyond The Stars.
Or The Fifth Element.
Or Transformers.
Who knows anymore.
Remember when Voyager was considered the worst of Star Trek. I miss those days.
Seriously! Voyager oh how we wronged you! Please come back!
@@joet7136 Voyager might not be TNG level, but it's fucking Shakespeare compared to Disco, Picard, and SNWs. It was real star Trek.
"Get the cheese to sickbay!"
@@lovecchio420 I agree 1000%. Seven and the Doctor were a top tier Star Trek duo. Right up there with Kirk/Spock, Garak/anybody, and Archer/Shran.
I'll take Captain "Duchess" Archer and Chief Shithead Neelix over JarJar Abrams and Alex "Shit for brains" Kurtzman any day.
I turned it off after 30 mins, how you stood 90 mins is a salute to your tenacity 🫡
Luther Sloan and Section 31 at DS9, when the walls fell…..
Shaka!
That was a story. This is just drivel. Tis a shame that they weaponise our nostalgia against us.
I agree.
Darmok and Jalad are most definitely NOT at Tanagra
Star Trek and Fans at Tanagra. Paramount+ their arms wide. Discovery, Picard, Lower Decks, Prodigy, Lower Decks, Section 31 when the walls fell. Fans, their face black, their eyes red. Fans alone on the ocean.
@@MorganHarris-e3s Absolute poetry. Bravo
Section 31 was much cooler when we knew less about it.
It was never cool. It's the antithesis of trek. Trek was about escape from rule by the cudgel, rule by corruption. People after Roddenberry kept polluting the vision to be more and more mafia-style misery.
Michelle Yeoh, an otherwise world class actress, really ought to have a talk with her agent about the recent highs and lows of career. How does one go from Everything Everywhere All At Once, to Witcher: Blood Origin, to Wicked, to Section 31? Good lord lmao
Perhaps she just wanted to check off the "Dragon Lady" box on her resume.
Well, I think she has a work ethic established way back when in her early martial-arts-flick years where number of movies rather than quality determined your status and income.
As Michael Caine once said "No, I have not seen Jaws 4. I have on the other hand seen the house it paid for, and that's terrific."
To be fair, Wicked has been well received, even by the Drinker, and fared well at the box office.
I don't care for whatshername who plays Elphaba, since she's a) ugly, and b) she found time to make a "how dare you" fake racist moment out of a fan's innocent, well-intended poster Photoshop.
But the film was a hit.
@@BuckyKronk OP was saying that Wicked was a hit but it was sandwiched between two pieces of crap
Your closing rant really struck a chord with me, not just in relation to the current state of Trek, but it also has parallels with the Alien franchise, just substitute Kurtzman for Ridley Scott (god, I wish I could forget the last 12 years of his Alien 'content')
Fans-“It’s dead"
Bad Robot-"We can still use it"
Fans-“It’s dead!"
Bad Robot- "The flesh is rotting but it still manageable for display and puppeteering"
Fans-“It’s dead!!"
Bad Robot- "The skeleton can be reused"
Fans-“Stop. It’s already dead!!!"
just like the ending of casino
*shocked skeleton noises*
6:19 - "the only way now is up". given their track record to date, that's a bold and likely foolish assumption...
Yeah seriously. You think they’ve reached rock bottom and here they are trying to limbo in hell
5:58 - "The more damage he's doinng to your IP." And your IQ.
“They’ve hit rock bottom, the only way is up.”
Paramount: Where is my shovel??
In my "Star Trek" timeline, the Voyager remains adrift in the Delta Quadrant, and everything that follows simply does not exist.
I tend to agree. All the temporal stuff really kind of started there and, as much as I kind of tolerated Enterprise, the temporal stuff warped things there too.
@indiajohnson Enterprise got really good by the time they dropped the temporal cold war crap. It may not be perfect but it is a million times better than modern trek
@@richyrich7260 I've always been of the thought that some of what season 4 was should've been the blueprint/template for that show instead of what we got for the first 3 seasons.
Enterprise was weird but I'm fine with giving that a pass as well, it was at least still Star Trek, they at least tried.
True but Archer was so boring and so drab. The other two were very dull as well. And the uniforms just made it look like it was filmed in a plumbing academy.
Is that pointy eared dude supposed to be a Vulcan? It feels like another Rings of Power situation where they stuck pointy ears on a human and forgot everything that makes that race who they are.
No its a nanite-sized slug like creature controlling a humanoid-sized Vulcan raised in Ireland.
There were short-hair Elves in the 1978 animated LOTR
@@Oblivion8393Who nobody likes to remember existed
Oh no, it's much much worse than that. Is some Men in Black level bullshit and I'm not making that up.
It's simple. Goblins cannot understand elves.
I feel you ...
There’s one thing I just can’t stand anymore: ornamental decorations [often in gold] on uniforms and armor. It is an indicator of exactly that.
Whether it’s Star Trek, Star Wars, or anything else, everything feels like a bland mix of skintight, oversexualized, choreographed, narcissistic designs. Add to that stuntman action where everyone is some kind of overpowered superhero, a bunch of characters with mental issues and special needs, and the rest is just boring video game aesthetics and random crap crammed into the frame.
you're right, its a trend. lookup what all the directors have in common
"Visual diarrhea". There's so much crap everywhere you end up just glazing over it all as white-noise.
"ornamental decorations [often in gold] on uniforms"
Don't those indicate "fascism"?
The best Star Trek vision was the pilot of TOS. Even TOS had to be crappified by the network.
@@SterileNeutrino Not necessarily. The Systems Alliance (Mass Effect) dress uniforms have quite a bit of gold, esp. on the shoulders and as piping. I think they qualify for "ornamental decorations" but not for the fascism part.
I miss the days of DS9 and Voyager. I'm so happy they still have reruns on tv
Let this be the final nail in Kurtzman/Jar Jar/ Bad Reboot Drek. Decanonization must swiftly follow.
Same for anything Star Wars made after 2012
@@maxmazzotti6651 Anything Star Wars made after the third original film. The Ewoks were already pushing it.
I felt the passion in that "go away now!!".
The whole things was one of the Drinker's best vocal performances.
It sound more like a cry for help. Maybe a vacation to a place with no movie theatres or internet for awhile.
6:06 I would love to see the reaction of the people in charge of this. We all know they watch your videos
I'm not sure they do anything as intelligent as watch his videos.
We already see their reaction, that's why Drinker and the rest are "toxic". Cause how dare someone tell the truth about these shitty excuses for movies. Just consume and don't think about it
thank you for falling on your sword and watching this
you saved us 90 minutes and instead gave us 6 minutes of hilarious video
you rock!
Alex Kurtzman shouldn't even be put in charge of selecting his own eyeglasses frames, much less a beloved, storied, influential, culturally important intellectual property like _Star Trek._
All the points you raised here could also be applied to Star Trek Discovery. Hence why most of us quit Star Trek after the first few episodes of that show. It wasn't just bad Star Trek, it wasn't just bad scifi, it was bad "entertainment" altogether. Is it really surprising anyone that they're still pushing out this shit?
Who knew Hollywood would have so lost its way that Uwe Boll would be a visionary artist who created masterpieces on par with DaVinci by comparison with modern cinema. Comparatively, he was an absolute genius. He actually possesses filmmaking skills that Hollywood no longer has. 30 years ago it would've been unthinkable that his movies would be a level of cinematic quality orders of magnitude above the quality of cinema produced after 2010...
Nah, Uwe Boll is the level of modern day Hollywood. Solid rock bottom.
Make no mistake, his movies are still terrible.
Uwe Boll - incompetent
Modern cinema - incompetent plus shoehorned ideological messaging
This 6 minute review showcased more creative talent than the entirety of the Alex Kurtzman Star Trek catalog.
The irony is I loved Section 31 in DS9, how did it all go wrong?
Section 31 in TV lore, was a shadow organization, not unlike the Tokugawa-era Ninja. They didn't stand out in a crowd and could be spies or assassins as needed. This movie turns canon upside down and makes Yet Another Dumpster Fire.
That’s because DS9 did Section 31 right. DS9 did most things right. Today’s Trek is slop.
Because DS9 had good writing for a majority of it.
The writer’s obsession with shoving Section 31 in every piece of Star Trek media for the past 20 years is a part of it.
@@Otokichi786 Which indicates, YET AGAIN, that Kurtzman possess a fundamental lack of understanding and reverence for the source material he uses to make his "projects".
I gave the train wreck known as "ST Discovery" a fair chance, but turned it off halfway through the premiere episode, haven't watched since. I gave your review almost 4 minutes before turning it off. You saved me from wasting maybe 30 minutes of my life! I thank you!!
Snap! I got about halfway thru the 1st episode before turning STD off: figured my TV was at serious risk of succumbing to violence from my foot. It was totally absurd and scientifically illiterate from the start.
You are a harder guy than I am. i turned STD of 10 minutes into the first Episode and rewatched all three seasons of TOS to reset my brain.
I enjoyed Discovery for what it was. Not bad. Not great. Something to watch while I waited for more Strange New Worlds or Lower Decks. And some of the characters were interesting. Until season 5. I have rarely seen a show faceplant as badly as it did. My wife and I were both shouting at the screen on several occasions, and Burnham has dropped to my least favorite captain - a human raised on Vulcan who only thinks with her emotions? What could possibly go wrong? I see why Lower Decks relegated Discovery to an alternate, non-cannon reality.
03:44 for me
I LIKE Discovery. And I love Strange New Worlds. But this is a giant space turd.
I hope they keep making content. Your takedowns are the stuff of legends.
Michelle Y. was looking great, as always :)
The growling "Go away now" killed me. Lmaooo
Remember when studio's enjoyed making money and hired good writers to write good stories? Huh, it seems so long ago.
My son is 7 now. We've been watching all the old classics. ET, Harry and the Hendersons, Star War 4-6. His favourite movie is the first Sam Rami Spider-Man. Dada's so proud!
You're a good dad to let your experience true escapism
The Neverending Story is amazing for children too! And The Goonies of course ^^
@jesterday2222 Yes, yes! We watched the Goonies very recently. I forgot how many swear words are in it! You get sensitive to that stuff when you've got kids! But, we'd recently gone through a whole thing about that at home, so it wasn't a problem. Besides that, fantastic film. I've got Neverending Story on the back burner. He's a bit sensitive to scary stuff, and that wolf is a bit much! But, maybe I'm being over cautious?!
We did Short Circuit, Flight of the Navigator, the Chronicles of Narnia movies, Toy Story, and more. He does swimming and kickboxing, btw, it's not all movies, lol. Don't want to sound like we spend everyday indoors!
There are so many great kids films from the 80's and 90's. It's important to see them early because some of the special effects are a bit rough, but your imagination fills in the blanks when you're a kid.
It's wonderful to watch them again through their eyes. I have a 4 year old girl and a 7 month old boy as well. My daughter joins us for the ones that are OK for her to watch, and I get to do it all again with little Teddy when he gets older.
Any more movie suggestions, then please let me know! It's difficult to remember them all, and I don't want to miss something important.
Oh, his favourite Star Wars was Empire! Kids got good taste already! My daughter's was ROTJ, but that's because she liked the Ewoks. She'll learn, she's only 4.
Every modern Star Trek film claims that every threat is the greatest threat the Federation has ever faced
It’s the same with Dr Who. Classic Who used to be about defeating monster of the week. With modern Who every story has the fate of the entire universe at risk. It’s such overblown bs.
The shonen power escalation problem.
This villain was so strong but this new villain is so much stronger despite the fact that the scope and scale of such a threat will appear the exact same if not weaker than the last or is incomprehensible to the audience.
The novels had a similar issue. Almost everything had the ability to "destroy the Federation"?
@@sigmacademy It makes you wonder why an enemy with that kind of power isn't already ruling most of the known universe if destroying the federation is easy to them?
The Dominion required three major galactic powers and many smaller ones, their supply chain for reinforcements cut off, and their leadership dying to beat.
How could you ever possibly top that in terms of scale in a way that's satisfying and not a a$*pull?
Don't forget destroying planets. Every place is Alderran with these hacks.
Ouch!!! Now that was an extraordinarily sharp critique. Good on you.
The sheer fucking hubris.
Nah, it'll be fine.
Guarantee you Paramount will find a way to dig through that rock bottom, for more disasaTrek.
If Hollywood never stops drilling, they'll eventually resurface in China.
Oh, hey ...
0:40 what a mental image Drinker…
Geeez, this image is inprinted in my mind now 😅
😂
Your review is spot on. I can't believe someone wrote the script for this garbage movie. How much money did Paramount throw away on this? It's so boring and stupid I had to take a break and finish it another night.