Jessa Reed - Meth Pee - This Is Not Happening - Uncensored

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  • Опубліковано 16 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 6 тис.

  • @standup
    @standup 5 років тому +260

    Looking for more This Is Not Happening? Check out comedians’ wildest drug stories here: ua-cam.com/play/PLD7nPL1U-R5pl-EsIsmgZTuS0t3Tm6EV8.html

    • @keithriley6597
      @keithriley6597 5 років тому +25

      Couldn't finish the video. Triggered meth addiction. Toooooooo real.

    • @ravenlockwood7477
      @ravenlockwood7477 4 роки тому +8

      Great minds really think alike I'm in recovery now but I can't tell you how many times I've thought of coming up with a comedy routine centered around my Addiction and recovery but always thought it would be to what's the word not raunchy she but close to it too intense maybe too dark for comedy

    • @brentgotcher4042
      @brentgotcher4042 4 роки тому +2

      @@ravenlockwood7477 u

    • @brentgotcher4042
      @brentgotcher4042 4 роки тому +1

      @@ravenlockwood7477 no

    • @ryanjones8737
      @ryanjones8737 4 роки тому

      I’m

  • @justajumpingypsygirl
    @justajumpingypsygirl 4 роки тому +2677

    I wish the anti-drug campaigns at schools were as entertaining as this.

    • @eriniquecordova1099
      @eriniquecordova1099 4 роки тому +13

      same

    • @pryingeyes1551
      @pryingeyes1551 4 роки тому +38

      Mine was a green frowny face that looked like this emoji 🤢 , with the caption "Buck says Yuck!" They never explained why Buck said yuck so, being the inquisitive young man that I was, I decided to find out for myself.
      Good job anti-drug thinktanks for which we pay.
      My aunt chainsmoked so much that I watched her die over the course of 16 hours. I thought the nurse was coming in to change her diaper, but it was to unplug the useless machines from a corpse. The only luggage she had was a huge red Marlboro duffelbag, which was her reward for a shortened lifetime of smoking. But sure, you brilliant anti-smoking thinktanks parody memes and cartoon butts with eyes twerking. Very informative.

    • @FrancisR420
      @FrancisR420 4 роки тому +24

      She literally lived in anti-drug PSA where she was a performer who got hooked on meth after one experience with a gateway then alienated her family, lost all her teeth, and started drinking piss for a fix and she's so entertaining about it it's a walking PSA
      It probably doesn't help that her only condemning of meth is that it's too good.

    • @jenferguson5951
      @jenferguson5951 4 роки тому +3

      Philip Morris wld b happy

    • @johndough7485
      @johndough7485 4 роки тому +2

      you know that shits court ordered right?

  • @fjmeza3110
    @fjmeza3110 4 роки тому +1127

    After 9 year of doing heroin, starting at age 14, I finally am 8 months clean which may not seem like a lot but it is for me. I can relate to this so much and I enjoyed it so much because of that. Sometimes all we can do is laugh about the things we've done because it's the only way we can talk about it. I find myself doing this sometimes. Anyways, great set. I look forward to watching more of her stuff

    • @deepermind4884
      @deepermind4884 4 роки тому +26

      That's awesome, I wish you strength & good health!

    • @user-zj2ye2ks7o
      @user-zj2ye2ks7o 4 роки тому +16

      Right on bro congrats and you nailed it...laughter is by far the BEST medicine hands down.
      Here's why...
      1. It takes 2 muscles to smile and 42 to frown.
      2. Anything you can change ...don't worry you can change it.
      Anything you can't change...don't worry you can't change it.
      3. The past and the future do not exist...fact...you can't put either of those things into my hand and prove they do so... That means there's only this moment we are in right NOW and it's constantly changing and we can manipulate it as we see fit. So always be here...in now...and be mindful of your thoughts and emotions. Always make this moment as awesome as possible and everyone around you in it as comfortable as possible then anything you would consider to be the past is going to be great because you did everything on now to assure it would be great. Any opportunities that come into your moment you will see clearly and have the ability to easily take any of them you see fit because you were here...in now...not some place that doesn't exist.
      4. Human emotions have a positive effect and a negative effect on water...fact (search Dr. Yamoto) and you and everyone else is almost entirely made or water...so there's that.
      5.This one is something EVERYONE needs to come to terms with and accept that it's the truth and you can't change the truth ... Here goes lay attention now...
      PEOPLE , PLACES,THINGS,EVENTS,WORDS, OR ANYTHING ELSE DOESN'T MAKE MAKE YOU "FEEL" ANYTHING! THE ONLY THING THAT COULD EVER MAKE YOU FEEL ANYTHING OR CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS IS IN FACT YOU!
      If someone or something somewhere is tricking you to think it's the cause of how you're feeling then please remind yourself you have the divine ability of CHOICE and it is you that in fact is choosing to be that way and feel what you are feeling...nothing else.
      6. To error is human to forgive is divine...do unto others as you would have them them do unto you... I'm in no way religious cause that's silly but both of these I think are great codes of contact we can all live by that would better our entire spieces and stop us from blowing up each other in record numbers to see who has the best imaginary friend with a penis in the sky...
      Just saying lmao
      7. Nice and simply put by Bruce Lee as the key to the way to live life and the centre and source of his martial art style Jet Kwon Do he created and used:
      ☯️Be As Water ☯️
      Just though I'd post this for ya bro because I wanted to give you some blunt honest to the point good advice that will definitely empower you.

    • @HealthyWealthyAndWise1976
      @HealthyWealthyAndWise1976 3 роки тому +12

      Stay clean brother

    • @jessymoore8868
      @jessymoore8868 3 роки тому +23

      I'm proud of you. Also clean from heroin right now ✌🤟

    • @fjmeza3110
      @fjmeza3110 3 роки тому +11

      @@user-zj2ye2ks7o Thanks, brother! I really appreciate it!

  • @Jacob32905
    @Jacob32905 6 років тому +1108

    She was hilarious. As a recovering addict myself I have so much respect and admiration for her for getting clean. Don't let the jokes fool ya, this lady is a force of nature.

    • @supakawaii69
      @supakawaii69 6 років тому +7

      Jacob Jones true shit

    • @AnthonyMartinez-jg8lo
      @AnthonyMartinez-jg8lo 6 років тому +13

      Jacob Jones once you tell the world about your addiction. its so much easier to joke about it. I'm a recovering heroin and meth user. location life is good

    • @manicpepsicola3431
      @manicpepsicola3431 5 років тому +1

      @@AnthonyMartinez-jg8lo lmao honestly though from your local pill head

    • @BipoIarbear
      @BipoIarbear 5 років тому +3

      Anthony Martinez Actually I find that life is boring as fuck😩
      My mates still do it on an off so I don’t play out much😔

    • @tracyroberson3553
      @tracyroberson3553 5 років тому

      Wow

  • @Heather_Nelson
    @Heather_Nelson 4 роки тому +1762

    She’s hilarious, but comedy aside, her story reminds me of what a wise friend of mine once said, “Transparency from a place of victory is powerful “.

    • @leejganderson7827
      @leejganderson7827 4 роки тому +9

      Make sence too me!!!!

    • @user-zj2ye2ks7o
      @user-zj2ye2ks7o 4 роки тому +13

      I absolutely love that quote very well put! Our failures become our greatest attributes when we use them to speak from experience in order to keep others from making the mistakes we made. The only way to lead is by example and if someone was a drug counselor who had a million degrees was top of their class and read every book on how to get clean but never once even touched a drug vs a total crackhead junkie,tweaker for 25 years straight who is now totally clean and has their own home and business plus head of the PTA I would want to learn from the second of those 2 any day on how I could do it too.
      Nice post you rock ;)
      PS: to the other comment here...sense...just saying...lol
      PS PS: still to the other commenter...makeS...TO...not too...this guy must be from Arizona lmao

    • @ketercognitohazard
      @ketercognitohazard 4 роки тому +4

      That's a very good quote.

    • @jeremyschlicht9690
      @jeremyschlicht9690 4 роки тому +2

      @@ketercognitohazard I agreee

    • @ketercognitohazard
      @ketercognitohazard 4 роки тому +5

      @@user-zj2ye2ks7o
      A second post script (that's what "p.s." stands for) would be "post-post-script", or "p.p.s." Not "PS PS." Just for future reference.

  • @Fr4ncM
    @Fr4ncM 5 років тому +4740

    This is probably the most uncanny routine I have ever seen. It was hilarious, sad, disgusting, and inspiring at the same time.

    • @TheLadyDelirium
      @TheLadyDelirium 5 років тому +115

      If her story was told in a different way it would have just been uncomfortably disturbing to listen to.

    • @aquabot
      @aquabot 5 років тому +24

      Just sad and disturbing, as far as I'm concerned. Didn't find it funny at all.

    • @andreabradley5837
      @andreabradley5837 5 років тому +79

      I'm probably my thirteenth time watching this. Gets funnier every time. I was never into meth but was with people who were. Helps make sense and let me laugh about it.

    • @tomkat678
      @tomkat678 4 роки тому +10

      The truth hurts !

    • @accuser_of_the_brethren7816
      @accuser_of_the_brethren7816 4 роки тому +62

      She's healing through talking about it and learning to laugh at her past mistakes the same way group therapy is implicated in psychiatric wards. Or would you rather she feels ashamed for her remaining days until the grief and shame becomes too much and she hangs herself? It's important not to judge people based on their passed but the character displayed in the present. So, go fuck yourself Karen..

  • @AllGoodGoddess
    @AllGoodGoddess 4 роки тому +1554

    I've gotta say for the hard core addiction she lived through and the fact that she's 39, she looks FANTASTIC!! Hell ya Jessa!!

    • @davidneumann2705
      @davidneumann2705 4 роки тому +10

      Hope Scott ah that’s the lighting she sorta looks a little tired.

    • @Jammil2477
      @Jammil2477 4 роки тому +4

      They aren’t her teeth, so...remove them and she looks tired.

    • @Andreia.Fernandes526
      @Andreia.Fernandes526 4 роки тому +33

      She does look great

    • @aryjarvis3161
      @aryjarvis3161 4 роки тому +41

      @@Jammil2477 small price to pay for looking like a normal human who can get a job. Humans are supposed to have teeth I don't know what to tell you.

    • @aryjarvis3161
      @aryjarvis3161 4 роки тому +87

      @@davidneumann2705 I suggest you take a look at your nearest tweaker and make a cross comparison. She looks AMAZING after 6 years on meth

  • @CannonFodderKing1
    @CannonFodderKing1 5 років тому +1380

    This woman is a living It's Always Sunny episode. Bravo.

    • @Jomzi01
      @Jomzi01 5 років тому +3

      "This woman is a living It's Always Sunny episode" hahahahah god shut up with your annoying comments you jerk

    • @notpulverman9660
      @notpulverman9660 5 років тому +17

      Sunny's funny because it's real.
      If its not real to u its because you've got your shit together.

    • @CannonFodderKing1
      @CannonFodderKing1 5 років тому +22

      @@Jomzi01 ???

    • @Jomzi01
      @Jomzi01 5 років тому +1

      @@CannonFodderKing1 I think your comment is annoying and stupid.

    • @Paula-qn7gi
      @Paula-qn7gi 5 років тому +59

      Dennis “is there any leftover crack”
      Dee. “No Dennis... never in the history of crack has there ever been any leftover crack.”

  • @DigitalAndInnovation
    @DigitalAndInnovation 3 роки тому +223

    This is possibly the most well curated routine I have ever heard- The storytelling is just so tight you fell like you went along the journey... yet even though it is so deep, it dosn't harm the comedy-- I wish I could find some more of her material!!

    • @lammborguni
      @lammborguni Рік тому +10

      she has a podcast called mormon and the methhead! they are both comedians and it’s fantastic

    • @DigitalAndInnovation
      @DigitalAndInnovation Рік тому +3

      @@lammborguni I know what I am going to binge next!! Thanks for mentioning it!

  • @michaelthomas4275
    @michaelthomas4275 5 років тому +573

    Bless her heart for opening up. Almost 7 years clean now, the hardest thing I ever have done

    • @hattienuff1405
      @hattienuff1405 5 років тому +8

      So very happy for you, wishing you a lifetime of staying clean & sober 🤗

    • @michaelthomas4275
      @michaelthomas4275 5 років тому +4

      @@hattienuff1405 thank you, although it's not like it was, the thought comes to mind from time to time

    • @nicko.3248
      @nicko.3248 5 років тому +7

      Congratulations 2 u on your sobriety..... THE THOUGHT never goes away for good, but you have won the fight.
      Find a passion and go all in with it..... Keep yourself busy,occupied as much as you can with physically and creatively
      rewarding activity, eat healthy and sleep regularly.. These all help alot....... Best of luck to ya for real,

    • @michaelthomas4275
      @michaelthomas4275 5 років тому +5

      @@nicko.3248 thank you, and i did, found my wife, and had our son, another lil one's one the way as well. God bless

    • @milanav4089
      @milanav4089 5 років тому +5

      Michael, you’re amazing. Really inspiring to see comments such as yours. My brother is a long-time addict, so it’s heartwarming to know that things can get better. Thanks for sharing.

  • @mysteriousgirl2000
    @mysteriousgirl2000 4 роки тому +427

    good for her for being so open and strong enough to let people laugh at her addiction. shit is sooo difficult

  • @sunnykelly4448
    @sunnykelly4448 5 років тому +1887

    I'm loving all of the recovering addicts in the comments, I'm proud of all of you and I am sorry i can't hit the like button on all of your comments.

    • @shannoncofer8798
      @shannoncofer8798 5 років тому +41

      Thank you... It really is hard but my life is turning into a better life. But hearing her talk about this makes me think how I was in other people's eyes.... Im going on 6 months now....

    • @sphinxrising1129
      @sphinxrising1129 5 років тому

      Duncan, so you're one of them people who believe everything you see online😂

    • @sunnykelly4448
      @sunnykelly4448 5 років тому +18

      Sphinx Rising You can believe what you want, believe in the worst in people if you want to live negatively. That’s on you boo, not me.

    • @sunnykelly4448
      @sunnykelly4448 5 років тому +15

      Shannon Cofer I’m proud of your progress

    • @BreakBeatScience311
      @BreakBeatScience311 5 років тому +2

      You’re sweet! And thank you!

  • @gabriellenichole3445
    @gabriellenichole3445 4 роки тому +149

    A pink ball gown, sketchers, FBI windbreaker and tiara is the BEST outfit I’ve ever heard of. 😂👏👏🥳👑💕

    • @zoezzzarko1117
      @zoezzzarko1117 3 роки тому +5

      If only we all could be so free 😎💜❤🧡💛💚💗

  • @melishamarie6835
    @melishamarie6835 5 років тому +2518

    Shes hilarious!! I did meth for almost 3 years. Been clean for 2 years. It's nice to have someone laugh over such a hard time in life

    • @tolfan4438
      @tolfan4438 5 років тому +32

      Dude I used to do 3/4 grams a day and I have got some of the best funniest stories in that time in my life

    • @MartinsBrew
      @MartinsBrew 5 років тому +8

      Bullet is cheaper.

    • @jennymahar1806
      @jennymahar1806 5 років тому +29

      Me too...so happy i found this and comments like yours! 😊 (4 months clean)

    • @kilbridemeredith8742
      @kilbridemeredith8742 5 років тому +6

      @@tolfan4438
      Good times! Health doesn't hold out though, but fun while it lasted!

    • @melishamarie6835
      @melishamarie6835 5 років тому +43

      Uh no... any drug addict could tell you they could handle doing it "just once" but that just isnt the case. I'd rather be off meth than on meth. Nothing will change my mind about that anymore. Including meth lol

  • @11muzik99
    @11muzik99 5 років тому +351

    Easily one of the best in this series. Never laughed and cringed simultaneously like that before. Respect for your brutal honesty and recovery, Jessa!

  • @shadesofgray5476
    @shadesofgray5476 5 років тому +421

    I never have did any serious drugs. But I'd give anything to UNDERSTAND one of my (adult) children's problem with meth and other drugs. This was brave and honest. Thank you.

    • @criskp6861
      @criskp6861 5 років тому +22

      The addiction becomes your new air to breath. You feel as if you are suffocating without it.

    • @shadesofgray5476
      @shadesofgray5476 5 років тому +49

      @@OMGpandemic Thank you. Oh please don't give up. The person I spoke about is doing much better, but it still is a one day at a time thing. The pain you feel when you lose a child whether a minor or an adult never ever goes away. My former addict child called me up today and told me about her struggle with depression. She had been self medicating all these years, I said to her, now you have to deal with it. We talked for hours and I told her to call me every day and I would listen to anything she needed to say. I love her so much and I can't imagine a world without her.

    • @shadesofgray5476
      @shadesofgray5476 5 років тому +7

      @@criskp6861 Thank you for this.

    • @linneajordyn5275
      @linneajordyn5275 5 років тому +1

      You should watch the movie Beautiful Boy. The father is relatable.

    • @franqbeans
      @franqbeans 5 років тому +2

      Prayers to you and your child

  • @The79woody
    @The79woody 3 роки тому +139

    Wow...as someone who grew up in central Missouri on a diet of Mountain Dew infused with meth, I laughed all the way through this and cried at the end. She’s lucky her sister was there for her.

    • @IzzyBizzyBooBoo
      @IzzyBizzyBooBoo 2 роки тому +6

      I mean...she let her use the bathroom and have a soda...then gave her like a 1 or 2 sentence "get yourself together".

    • @alexandrorox
      @alexandrorox Рік тому

      Same, me too

    • @scotticidal
      @scotticidal Рік тому

      I'm west central Illinois, we're not too far and our diet wasn't that far off either😂

    • @lokdwn4561
      @lokdwn4561 10 місяців тому

      ​@@IzzyBizzyBooBooYep. She was there for her.

  • @sigh4627
    @sigh4627 5 років тому +4234

    I'm 540 days meth free and this story has me dead af. She said "I quit doing comedy to pursue meth full time" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @urigarcia6441
      @urigarcia6441 5 років тому +57

      Good for you, try not to drink meth piss and you'll be okay

    • @LawJones413
      @LawJones413 5 років тому +58

      Good job, bro.

    • @brittaolson6550
      @brittaolson6550 5 років тому +76

      Sigh Whenever I think I can’t come back from how far I fell, I just come back to “Meth Pee.” If this is not an “If I can do it, you can too” Inspirational story, I don’t know what is!

    • @tedkazcynkski4328
      @tedkazcynkski4328 5 років тому +3

      Did youu steal people's shit to support your junk habit?

    • @seeyoulater4259
      @seeyoulater4259 5 років тому +16

      Congrats keep it that way

  • @michaelcrawford4940
    @michaelcrawford4940 5 років тому +993

    I truly believe you’re not fully recovered until you can talk comfortably about your past use. This is an incredible example of that

    • @BreakBeatScience311
      @BreakBeatScience311 5 років тому +21

      Michael Crawford until you truly accept it, you’re correct. Had issues until I accepted I was a recovered heroin addict who made piss poor (pun intended) decisions!

    • @michaelcrawford4940
      @michaelcrawford4940 5 років тому +13

      Christopher Doyon Congratulations on your recovery. You don’t learn from your mistakes until you own them. Making any excuse at all means you’re not ready to learn from it and that’s the most important part about making mistakes. We all make them but only wise people learn from them

    • @Lollita23
      @Lollita23 5 років тому +1

      So true😊

    • @ricksanchez4813
      @ricksanchez4813 5 років тому

      Michael Crawford Congrats on YOUR recovery. How long did it take you to be hooked

    • @michaelcrawford4940
      @michaelcrawford4940 5 років тому

      Rick Sanchez Do you mean how long did I use before I became an addict, how long was I using for, how long I’ve been recovered? I don’t understand the question.

  • @sgoff4168
    @sgoff4168 5 років тому +1523

    The beauty of comedy from dark places. It's how I've survived. I wanna hug her.

    • @BreakBeatScience311
      @BreakBeatScience311 5 років тому +3

      S Goff amen

    • @meltingpotmeme6181
      @meltingpotmeme6181 5 років тому

      Nah. People just get angry about others getting higher than them.

    • @mydogsioux
      @mydogsioux 5 років тому +1

      Majority you missed the point.

    • @ivybelle5044
      @ivybelle5044 5 років тому +6

      I laughed and cried cause I felt her. Real shit

    • @bendejo8
      @bendejo8 5 років тому +1

      @@meltingpotmeme6181 no, i was just prescribed legal pharmacy meth when i was in grade school.

  • @matthewepperly7964
    @matthewepperly7964 4 роки тому +147

    This is so revealing and she is so unbelievably brave for sharing this disgusting story. It takes a great combination of guts and talent to perform a routine so dark and yet have it be so effortlessly funny.

  • @linaluv215
    @linaluv215 6 років тому +554

    I was so into this story, chin on fist and everything! Its comedians like this, with real stories and honesty that need to be pushed to the forefront.

    • @mrknarf4438
      @mrknarf4438 5 років тому +6

      Lina Luv I think with the best comedians you just stop caring whether the story is true or not.

  • @deelite1007
    @deelite1007 5 років тому +470

    That was the saddest/funniest story I ever heard. God bless her.

  • @mybraineatseverything7404
    @mybraineatseverything7404 6 років тому +108

    To all the commenters here celebrating meth sobriety, I salute you and offer you congratulations, and continued recovery. Meth addiction is one of the most difficult to overcome. I've done it and seen what it can do to people. I applaud and commend you for your bravery and strength, and I thank you for sharing your stories. Bright blessing always, and may God continue to bless you.

    • @tolfan4438
      @tolfan4438 5 років тому +1

      I don't see what's so hard about it. One day I ran out I didn't have any more money in the bank it's been 30 something years no problem my heart only stopped two or three times

  • @segamai
    @segamai 3 роки тому +77

    I come back to this video every couple of months, it really is the best one of the series. So well constructed, so irreverent, perfect comedic timing and such a charismatic woman.

  • @dustinhargrove2129
    @dustinhargrove2129 5 років тому +1746

    “If you can’t handle me at my methyest” 😂😂😭

    • @galehess6676
      @galehess6676 5 років тому +26

      then you don't get me when ma trailer xplodes and burns to the ground

    • @sciencenate
      @sciencenate 5 років тому +12

      It’s gotta be spelled “methiest “ - is my guess lol

    • @dontedoestuff
      @dontedoestuff 5 років тому +5

      Nate Hill but it’s way funnier with the “y”

    • @clevernamehere
      @clevernamehere 5 років тому +9

      That joke was methed up

    • @learntonganwithandrew
      @learntonganwithandrew 4 роки тому

      Are you from Chilliwack?

  • @carolynnalvarez7032
    @carolynnalvarez7032 6 років тому +1164

    I 100% can relate to this woman. I was fucked up for years and these stories are probably all true. Laughing at the pain is the only way out after we stop or else we'd kill ourselves from the shame. Shes soooo brave and very smart.

    • @showerbeerpodcast5517
      @showerbeerpodcast5517 6 років тому +58

      We've had her on our podcast, and not only are these stories true, they're just the tip of the iceberg. She tours, keep an eye out for her.

    • @malaltherenegadegod
      @malaltherenegadegod 6 років тому +12

      Carolynn Alvarez Been there too; I think its why its so damn funny. Lol.

    • @BobbyxZx
      @BobbyxZx 6 років тому +9

      what crimes did you commit to get your meth... i mean back when you were there... that would help me understand how meth addiction is funny, if you could explain all those incredibly ugly parts... her story is funny, but it's from the perspective of avoiding horrible truths, like the part where she shows up at her sister's out of the blue to get high in her bathroom. really funny stuff right there, if you've ever had an addict in your family... gross story is gross

    • @malaltherenegadegod
      @malaltherenegadegod 6 років тому +10

      Bobby Z I remember this guy one time walked through my neighbor's living room with a coffee pot... That was literally on fire. Yeah. Everyone freaked and ran outside. Another time six grown men felled eight trees with one axe between them. Meth.

    • @BobbyxZx
      @BobbyxZx 6 років тому +9

      tell a story about how you robbed people or turned tricks for it next, please... i know plenty of meth heads, it's not all flaming coffee pots and drinking piss, is it? y'all meth heads tend to avoid those stories, though... shit's gross, not funny

  • @cody9325
    @cody9325 6 років тому +735

    Shit this is too damn real.
    Never heard someone give such an accurate and funny description of tweaking.

    • @spanishnameisjesus
      @spanishnameisjesus 6 років тому +17

      Yeah, that's how you can tell she lived it. It's the little details, like having someone else inject it into her neck. Either she really did live this, or she did A LOT of research.

    • @buckefilbert
      @buckefilbert 6 років тому +5

      Where's all the porn watching sex having stuff? next chapter?

    • @jasonjewell1667
      @jasonjewell1667 5 років тому +6

      @@spanishnameisjesus she lived it for sure. She also has her own channel. She has some good stuff there as well.

    • @oozingpussbrain1130
      @oozingpussbrain1130 5 років тому +1

      @@buckefilbert I don't ever get super horny on amphetamines. I have heard that though. I don't lose my libito either but, if I have sex while high I can go for hours and cum on command! Hey! Maybe I should do Porn when I do meth!?

    • @forthesakeofsanityandsuch9331
      @forthesakeofsanityandsuch9331 5 років тому +1

      For real tho, this made my night!

  • @TheToofpick
    @TheToofpick Рік тому +31

    By far the funniest This Is Not Happening set. I know it’s sad and everything but laughing about terrible times can be therapeutic.

  • @AwesomenessHippopotamus
    @AwesomenessHippopotamus 6 років тому +629

    This might be the best, rawest story on this show. Unreal.

    • @jennaknight8863
      @jennaknight8863 6 років тому +5

      Awesomeness Hippopotamus probably the nastiest thing I've heard in a while and yeah drugs maked you loose your filter

    • @BobbyxZx
      @BobbyxZx 6 років тому

      definitely not best, but certainly most disgusting...

    • @MrCarltonjsmith
      @MrCarltonjsmith 6 років тому +10

      It's right up there with Ali Siddiq and that prison guard named Mitchell

    • @bbynnt.lindsayguzan414
      @bbynnt.lindsayguzan414 6 років тому +5

      Bobby Z is apparently STILL talking shit in every single thread on here 😂

    • @ZerdsJames
      @ZerdsJames 6 років тому +3

      Yeah, that's what I was thinking of. That bit and this are the only ones to make me stop laughing and just listen. Damn good stories.

  • @oxwilder
    @oxwilder 5 років тому +1050

    I actually started to applaud when she said she'd been clean for 12 years and then I realized I wasn't actually in the audience and it wasn't much of a contribution at this point

    • @jaymilutin6573
      @jaymilutin6573 4 роки тому +23

      oxwilder yeah, I teared up and banged the table for her.

    • @ultravioletskye
      @ultravioletskye 4 роки тому +16

      Thought that counts honestly. Thanks for caring about *addicts in recovery. ♡
      *better wording.

    • @samconner4016
      @samconner4016 4 роки тому +6

      I'm 540 days meth free and this story has me dead af. She said "I quit doing comedy to pursue meth full time" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @violettelovesjesus8888
      @violettelovesjesus8888 4 роки тому +1

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @clicheguevara5282
      @clicheguevara5282 3 роки тому +5

      Sometimes I’ll be watching something on Netflix and I’ll grab my keyboard to leave a comment. 😂

  • @individualm6712
    @individualm6712 6 років тому +3251

    This was raw & funny & brave & honest.

  • @gliscameria
    @gliscameria 4 роки тому +165

    Best Ted talk ever

  • @superman8109
    @superman8109 6 років тому +544

    What a fucking badass. It takes balls to tell a story like that.

    • @saysHotdogs
      @saysHotdogs 6 років тому +5

      Kyle Skerjanec you would not believe how many sexual propositions she got after this

    • @evanabbott2737
      @evanabbott2737 6 років тому +1

      Hell yeah!

    • @JoeyJoJoJr0
      @JoeyJoJoJr0 6 років тому +4

      And that was only one story; this woman has seen some shit!

    • @superman8109
      @superman8109 6 років тому +2

      Bobby Z, being desperate... maybe!!

    • @BobbyxZx
      @BobbyxZx 6 років тому +1

      that's my point. there's nothing "badass" about being a junky... my statement was intended to make one think. you know, many bums on the street have a similar story (and many of them are willing to tell it, if you'll listen). i know she was desperate to be high, that's obvious, even though it seems as though you mean it as a dismissal. the part she left out was all the horrible crimes she's committed for that desperation, how many friends and family members she's permanently damaged for her desire to be high. yeah, it comes off as a joke, and you can say she's a "badass" but she's really a recovering junky, not a hero. she does have a funny sense of humor, but i'd never leave her alone in my house, she drinks meth piss. i wonder, would she be as badass if she didn't get her teeth fixed? would anyone be able to sit through her story if her true former ugliness was shone? i really don't think so. that's what i mean when i ask: "what does it take to drink meth piss?"

  • @johnrv501
    @johnrv501 6 років тому +1206

    I'll be 18yrs clean 10/30/18, and this lady is Outrageous! Laughed my a** off!!

    • @prakharmathur5363
      @prakharmathur5363 6 років тому +18

      Congrats on 18 years buddy!!!

    • @supakawaii69
      @supakawaii69 6 років тому +5

      Hell yeah

    • @sryburn4234
      @sryburn4234 6 років тому +15

      Really proud of you bud!! Working at recovery myself. Thanks for the hope!!!

    • @mollymorrissey9544
      @mollymorrissey9544 6 років тому +23

      @Meso Phyl eh , I care!!! I care..., amazing that they got clean. That in itself is amazing 😙😙😙😙

    • @chocolatecharley99
      @chocolatecharley99 6 років тому +11

      @Meso Phyl what the fuck. And a lot of other countries use weed and opiates responsibly and it's considered a socially okay -just like alcohol. Alcohol is more damaging to the brain and live than marijuana can ever be (and I'm not even biased, I've only had an edible socially twice. It was good, stress-relieving, and I was able to wake up early in the morning and run no problem). Some people self prescribe because they don't have good or any healthcare and have chronic pain, a neurotransmitter disorder, trauma, and some were born in a low income community -didnt see a future for themselves there (no hope) and they didn't have anything to lose they thought (as young as 13 with parents who didn't care where they were). Where's your common sense, logic, and empathy?

  • @seyi.taylor
    @seyi.taylor 5 років тому +440

    "shit gets kinda dark around this point" and I'm like... ma'am; that was like 2 stories ago.
    also, kick-ass comedian!

    • @newsletter4826
      @newsletter4826 5 років тому

      i bet you spend a lot of time on Reddit and enjoy Lowest Common Denominator stuff. She had a horribly sad face, and will end up killing herself in the future, dude--there's nothing funny about that...didn't laugh even once, cause not a Reddit robot like you.

    • @InnaVitamina777
      @InnaVitamina777 5 років тому +1

      4 sho

    • @MrAllyourneeds
      @MrAllyourneeds 5 років тому +8

      What does reddit have to do with anything that is in this comment

    • @kielgraves8104
      @kielgraves8104 5 років тому +9

      @@newsletter4826 what the fuck are you talking about

    • @TragoudistrosMPH
      @TragoudistrosMPH 5 років тому

      Right? It gets worse? Lol 😕

  • @julia3354
    @julia3354 2 роки тому +43

    I watch this sketch a lot. She is such an underrated comedian, and this is the funniest way anyone could've told the story of their journey through addiction to hard drugs.

  • @americanmutt2901
    @americanmutt2901 5 років тому +757

    I've been clean for 8 days and being sober is hard.

    • @tarrencestewart9782
      @tarrencestewart9782 5 років тому +47

      Keep praying constantly..

    • @tarrencestewart9782
      @tarrencestewart9782 5 років тому +38

      All day every day...

    • @americanmutt2901
      @americanmutt2901 5 років тому +25

      Ty so much.

    • @blameitonablackstar
      @blameitonablackstar 5 років тому +46

      It gets easier. You got this! Keep going! Freedom is amazing. Pray and surround yourself with people that support you. 💜💜💜

    • @bee4590
      @bee4590 5 років тому +21

      Keep it up. Proud of you

  • @MissSavvy
    @MissSavvy 5 років тому +146

    I work with women who are homeless. There's a client who has been through the ringer, but her most admirable quality for me is her humor and honesty. This just reminds me of her, and what she can accomplish.

    • @LynnRodrigues
      @LynnRodrigues 4 роки тому +11

      Miss Savvy Somebody has probably already told you this but thank you for your work with women who are homeless!

    • @missyvaughn4467
      @missyvaughn4467 3 роки тому +5

      😉

  • @coltonlewis5027
    @coltonlewis5027 6 років тому +1699

    This is the realest chick ive ever heard speak

    • @YappingGamerDad
      @YappingGamerDad 6 років тому +1

      Colton Lewis and

    • @colechillen7700
      @colechillen7700 6 років тому +24

      She's dope af.

    • @John_McDonnell
      @John_McDonnell 6 років тому +48

      Sometimes you have to go through the hell of nastiest bitch to get to the realm of realest chick.

    • @missoula2213
      @missoula2213 6 років тому +3

      She is the trashiest chick to ever exist.

    • @AperturePowered
      @AperturePowered 6 років тому +72

      lol who cares man, why do women have to all meet one standard archetype, that shit's boring. She's self aware and able to make jokes about a very fucked up period of her life, what part of that is trashy?

  • @DesireandLoss92
    @DesireandLoss92 2 роки тому +52

    I'm not gonna lie...I have watched this same bit at least 7-8 times. She's just so charming and hilarious and the story is just so well told and insane. Love her!

    • @jasonlangshaw4506
      @jasonlangshaw4506 11 місяців тому +2

      Me too though. I just remember it sometimes and pull it back up.

    • @DesireandLoss92
      @DesireandLoss92 11 місяців тому +1

      @@jasonlangshaw4506 Yesss thank you for commenting, it gave me a reason to watch again haha

    • @segamai
      @segamai 9 місяців тому +1

      I HAVE to watch this at least twice a year or the world will end. I think this is my all-time favorite standup routine

  • @GoodAzKinBe
    @GoodAzKinBe 6 років тому +463

    LMAO! Funny AF!!!! Stay sober Jessa cause comedy is definitely your calling.

  • @Ask8613
    @Ask8613 5 років тому +5073

    Why did we get Amy Schumer when Jessa Reid was available.

    • @janedont63
      @janedont63 5 років тому +35

      Doesitmatter? I guess we don’t deserve her 😂

    • @Ask8613
      @Ask8613 5 років тому +53

      @@janedont63 it's true😔. We aren't worthy

    • @7Lace77
      @7Lace77 5 років тому +113

      But are we that undeserving to be punished with Amy Schumer?!

    • @johnnywang798
      @johnnywang798 5 років тому +45

      Yo she I waaaayyyyg funnier than Amy shit show

    • @Selvarin
      @Selvarin 5 років тому +56

      Amy's an unfunny potato. Who knows, a bunch of people were looking for the next Dane Cook and there she was.

  • @eltodd124
    @eltodd124 6 років тому +177

    They should show this to kids in high school as a deterrent. You just can't beat honesty.

    • @brandenfarbanger3935
      @brandenfarbanger3935 6 років тому +12

      S. Todd Bowland this made me want to do Meth

    • @josephneider7332
      @josephneider7332 6 років тому +8

      I loved how absolutely dead quiet the audience was between punchlines. You simply cannot fuck with that much honesty.

    • @frankblue5250
      @frankblue5250 6 років тому +1

      She still thick tho. Damn 👍

    • @tommyjones8490
      @tommyjones8490 6 років тому +2

      Can't show this to Tide Pod generation, they will be paying homeless addicts for Big Gulps off meth piss.......

    • @jasonjewell1667
      @jasonjewell1667 5 років тому

      Go to or listen to a 12 step NA speaker meeting

  • @monadamus42
    @monadamus42 4 роки тому +34

    This is one of the absolute best. Jessa is a perfect storyteller. I am amazed how perfect this story and delivery are.

  • @ccceeee
    @ccceeee 5 років тому +372

    "If you can't take take me at my methiest, you don't deserve me when my trailer blows up" Yes she is amazing! I do know a Shorty, as well. I did meth by accident like her. She's so accurate, even the ones that hit you in your neck, my gosh

    • @sunnyj210
      @sunnyj210 3 роки тому +11

      I swear to God I did meth by accident too! Same as her..guy said it was coke!

    • @joeschmoe442
      @joeschmoe442 2 роки тому +1

      Shorty ripped me off $20

    • @rossdanes9631
      @rossdanes9631 2 роки тому +2

      @@joeschmoe442 You ALWAYS ride with Shorty and never let him out of ur sight.

  • @josinapitt7596
    @josinapitt7596 5 років тому +167

    "“Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you.” TL. This amazing lady is so funny and brave! Kudos to you

  • @powerpc127
    @powerpc127 5 років тому +752

    "Tonight I'm going to tell you about the last time I drank piss."
    I'm listening...

    • @jondunmore4268
      @jondunmore4268 5 років тому +8

      ...with an erection.

    • @Hoodwaze
      @Hoodwaze 5 років тому +4

      @@jondunmore4268 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂YES!!!!!

    • @Hoodwaze
      @Hoodwaze 5 років тому +2

      Thats how you start a set!!

    • @kielgraves8104
      @kielgraves8104 5 років тому +4

      Sigh *unzips*

    • @mchan2141
      @mchan2141 5 років тому

      Yes

  • @ericbagley7976
    @ericbagley7976 2 роки тому +31

    This is pure genius her timing is perfect and she can go way over the edge and take you along for the ride I love this chick, absolutely brilliant

  • @itsjohnnymillion
    @itsjohnnymillion 5 років тому +183

    This crowd was not ready for this set. I don’t know if I was, but it’s epic.

    • @butternutsquash17
      @butternutsquash17 4 роки тому +4

      I don't know that any crowd is yet! And because of people like her, that will change 😊

  • @alexandriap6132
    @alexandriap6132 5 років тому +214

    What kind of world do we live in where u cant trust a stranger selling u drugs 💜😂😂😂

  • @Charles-vk1lb
    @Charles-vk1lb 6 років тому +150

    I have serial watched this episode. I can say without any shadow of doubt, this is one of the funniest stories I have ever heard. It's every bit as funny as Pryor's 'Little Feets', Carlin's '7 Dirty Words', Bruce's 'Airplane Glue', etc. Miss Reed has the tools and mettle to be one of comedies greatest of all time. Thank you, Miss Reed, for being genuine, and genuinely funny.

    • @mikekoenig6467
      @mikekoenig6467 6 років тому +2

      Stop trying to get her to give you meth piss

    • @patrick74444
      @patrick74444 5 років тому +6

      Mexicans Got On Boots!!!

    • @Shoota5269
      @Shoota5269 5 років тому

      “Wit Little BABY FEETS!”😂👌🏾🤣🤣😂

    • @mellistotheMAX
      @mellistotheMAX 5 років тому

      Why you gotta label her "Miss?"

  • @scottslocum3319
    @scottslocum3319 Рік тому +11

    As a recovering addict she is hilarious and now I'm definitely looking her up on UA-cam! She's awesome!!!

  • @48Murillo
    @48Murillo 4 роки тому +653

    I like the guy that laughed really loud after the "snuff porn" line

    • @davidneumann2705
      @davidneumann2705 4 роки тому +12

      Murillo hahahahah I know that was pretty hilarious! What a real sicko perv haha.

    • @violenceisfun
      @violenceisfun 4 роки тому +10

      hahaha that's me hahaha

    • @LastbutNotFirst
      @LastbutNotFirst 3 роки тому +29

      he laughed because shes honestly making a good visual for the story. this comedian was hanging around the lowest of the low.

    • @ex8722
      @ex8722 3 роки тому +5

      That guy was thinking wow that was YOU... hahhahaha

    • @Psychol-Snooper
      @Psychol-Snooper 3 роки тому +1

      I gasped... even though I know there is no evidence that they exist.

  • @shilohstore6086
    @shilohstore6086 5 років тому +81

    I cannot emphasize how horrible and relatable and funny this story is and how huge it is that somebody will tell their story!

  • @Boba_Fettuccine.
    @Boba_Fettuccine. 6 років тому +952

    That was amazing!! Where has this woman been while we were stuck with Iliza Shlesinger and Amy Schumer on Netflix?

    • @maidenless9504
      @maidenless9504 6 років тому +124

      Boba Fettuccine doing meth apparently

    • @Boba_Fettuccine.
      @Boba_Fettuccine. 6 років тому +31

      HAHA. Yeah she's a wild one. Still 12 years sober, I wish I would have heard about her sooner

    • @benjipesci5197
      @benjipesci5197 6 років тому +3

      That's what Im saying

    • @suk4honesty
      @suk4honesty 6 років тому +16

      Ok glad I'm not the only one who doesn't think Liza is unfunny

    • @brettpid6416
      @brettpid6416 6 років тому +4

      she kind of looks like Amy though doesn't she?

  • @andreaarmandi9456
    @andreaarmandi9456 4 роки тому +231

    Any other episode is a joke compared to this masterpiece.

    • @MikMikChic
      @MikMikChic 3 роки тому +8

      Not the Joey Diaz one...

    • @_Fury
      @_Fury 3 роки тому +3

      I like Joe Rogan and the crazy stripper, but this one is definitely top 3

  • @mangaroxx
    @mangaroxx 6 років тому +197

    Where is her 1 hour special? One of the best comics I've heard.

    • @thehorseformerlywithoutana2522
      @thehorseformerlywithoutana2522 6 років тому +5

      She's ok. Sometimes she nails the timing. Sometimes it's off. She paused for laugh breaks that either came late or never. She was a bit predictable, but there were some good ones. She can tell a helluva story though, I'll give her that.

    • @zacharywalsh6481
      @zacharywalsh6481 6 років тому +15

      @@thehorseformerlywithoutana2522 no part of that story about meth pee was predictable

    • @yakubthecavebeast6444
      @yakubthecavebeast6444 6 років тому

      @@thehorseformerlywithoutana2522 I'd just say she needa to work on her transitions. Some of the fluff before the "[so I started drinking my piss]" part didn't tie together well so it seemed a bit drawn out.

    • @CertifiedSkank
      @CertifiedSkank 6 років тому

      She has a podcast. Mormon and the Meth Head. It’s fantastic.

  • @itsjustme9751
    @itsjustme9751 6 років тому +434

    Anyone that is contemplating using meth for the first time, should watch this.

    • @ThelagKingStrikes
      @ThelagKingStrikes 6 років тому +24

      Yeah, it is a very informative "how to" guide. 😉

    • @nebulousisgod
      @nebulousisgod 6 років тому +31

      Nobody contemplates using hard drugs for long than a few moments, not nearly enough time to consider all the consequences and make an informed decision. Sorry but drugs don’t work like that. It’s circumstantial. If you think otherwise I guarantee you’ve never been an addict.

    • @ThelagKingStrikes
      @ThelagKingStrikes 6 років тому +5

      @@nebulousisgod I can confirm your statements.

    • @CertifiedSkank
      @CertifiedSkank 6 років тому +7

      If only that’s how deciding to do drugs worked.,.

    • @ChristyCallahan
      @ChristyCallahan 5 років тому +11

      Yeah they don’t have to waste all of those years not knowing about the pee thing!

  • @ThisEpicLife
    @ThisEpicLife 5 років тому +278

    Speaking as a paramedic who works in a region where meth is very common, I would say that she is spot-on.

    • @remainfocused8570
      @remainfocused8570 4 роки тому +8

      Must work in this place called America

    • @clicheguevara5282
      @clicheguevara5282 3 роки тому +9

      @@remainfocused8570 You do realize that the VAST majority of Americans don’t do meth and most places don’t have meth problems, right?

    • @alberteinstein3078
      @alberteinstein3078 3 роки тому +2

      @@remainfocused8570 yeah that's a really dumb comment just Google yaba. You should probably delete your comment lol

    • @remainfocused8570
      @remainfocused8570 3 роки тому

      @@alberteinstein3078 u bet, soon as yr comb yr Jew fro

    • @alberteinstein3078
      @alberteinstein3078 3 роки тому

      @@remainfocused8570 I'm already dead what does it matter. Plus dude you don't want to look like a moron do you?

  • @chipsthedog1
    @chipsthedog1 3 роки тому +13

    This is without doubt the funniest one of these I've seen and unlike a lot of the others I believe every word. Amazing story from an amazing lady using the worst time of her life to make others laugh. Bless her she deserves any success she gets just for making it through all that and getting sober

  • @Lynx196.9
    @Lynx196.9 5 років тому +500

    I’m now exactly an hour clean, looking forward to this new journey, please pray for me, inspirational and funny as hell!

    • @dreadserror1771
      @dreadserror1771 5 років тому +5

      I understand how you feel

    • @Lynx196.9
      @Lynx196.9 5 років тому +34

      Nino Vigil thx, still maintaining strong

    • @greggrim4965
      @greggrim4965 5 років тому +13

      @@Lynx196.9 good for you , keep up the good work I know it's hard . I just relasped and bought a gram . Havent touched it yet but it keeps speaking to me... Just one hit or line , you don't even have to shoot me..
      Stay strong. And wish me luck . Well enough willpower .

    • @totallynotzokix11_mc21
      @totallynotzokix11_mc21 5 років тому +10

      It's been 3 days, you still clean?

    • @Lynx196.9
      @Lynx196.9 5 років тому +35

      Totally not Zokix11_MC still maintaining, thx for asking

  • @juleswoodbury58
    @juleswoodbury58 6 років тому +102

    she should be a writer for it's always sunny in philadelphia. Or the sixth member of the gang.

    • @ITopplepharaohs
      @ITopplepharaohs 6 років тому

      I was literally thinking this exact same thing!!

    • @alanal1029
      @alanal1029 6 років тому

      YASSSSSSS!!!

  • @Aaroooony9d3
    @Aaroooony9d3 6 років тому +319

    Caught my neighbor trimming the edges of her back lawn with scissors. Never gave it a second thought until now.

    • @SerenityForschen
      @SerenityForschen 6 років тому +30

      To be fair I have done that completely sober. I didn't have an edger/trimmer at the time and I get super into my house projects.

    • @gorrillawarfair
      @gorrillawarfair 6 років тому +14

      Serenity Forschen do you take adderall?

    • @sophiel362
      @sophiel362 6 років тому +18

      That could just be some anal retentive OCD type shit there. Not necessarily tweakage

    • @SerenityForschen
      @SerenityForschen 6 років тому +4

      Nope, I am a just a weird robot naturally.

    • @gabrieladerre2862
      @gabrieladerre2862 6 років тому +6

      Was she doing it at 2-4 a.m.?

  • @lovelysubbie338
    @lovelysubbie338 2 роки тому +3

    How am I just seeing this! It’s real and raw! Probably one of the all time best addiction routines I have seen to date. The madness we went through needs to be told in a way that makes us laugh for our own sanity but is still a warning to others.
    Excellent story telling

  • @CivilCJ
    @CivilCJ 6 років тому +22

    You almost never get the perspective of the person who's fucking up. Huge props, and great story telling!

  • @midnightawakens994
    @midnightawakens994 5 років тому +132

    It’s admirable how she makes something that must have been such a traumatizing part of her life seem like a light occurrence! I laughed despite the dark context!

    • @OO-qr1ks
      @OO-qr1ks 5 років тому

      Nothing is admirable about this skank literally it she's not funny and the skit is foul as fuck

    • @greggrim4965
      @greggrim4965 5 років тому +5

      @@OO-qr1ks first day on the internet there buddy ?

  • @aafloofy
    @aafloofy 5 років тому +41

    Been clean since March, this set was AMAZING... so so funny. She’s a huge inspiration

    • @zach7482
      @zach7482 4 роки тому +1

      Congrats on one year

    • @aafloofy
      @aafloofy 4 роки тому +1

      @Peighnis Honourchign good one

    • @Dapryor
      @Dapryor 2 роки тому

      Still clean?

  • @marksark1119
    @marksark1119 3 роки тому +10

    So much of Jessa's routine on this vid is from her own personal history. I'm a recovering alcoholic with 16 years of sobriety on July 7, 2021. So I can relate in a way. Congrats to you Jenna on your sobriety.

  • @Adam-qh8vf
    @Adam-qh8vf 5 років тому +16

    I love the "raw" comedy. Shows real parts of life that a lot of people do see but most people don't. Some people are so taken aback by these types of topics but they really should know these things are normal to a lot of people every day. Opens the perspective, potentially.

  • @jasonbourne4865
    @jasonbourne4865 4 роки тому +93

    I revisit this routine every month or so. Shit never gets old. Love the way she self-distances with that deadpan delivery.

    • @joey19xx73
      @joey19xx73 4 роки тому

      You drink your meth piss every month?

  • @kiddkidavur7798
    @kiddkidavur7798 5 років тому +102

    Best Bit Ever!!! Im a recovered meth head did it for 16 years and im a year clean.....and this shit is extremely relatable to me, makes me laugh so hard

    • @jbird1224
      @jbird1224 5 років тому +1

      Kidd Kidavur relate time drinking piss??? Awesome

  • @TheAndrewj96
    @TheAndrewj96 Рік тому +4

    The setup and delivery of “this is gross” was _perfect._ Definitely going to check out more of her stuff.

  • @Mrius86
    @Mrius86 6 років тому +317

    They clap when you do drugs.
    They clap when you stop doing drugs.

    • @fibonaccifractal7298
      @fibonaccifractal7298 5 років тому

      @Gordon Torney 👏

    • @Rita-kx3yr
      @Rita-kx3yr 5 років тому +19

      We be a simple folk

    • @BipoIarbear
      @BipoIarbear 5 років тому +10

      They don’t clap if u have never done drugs😂

    • @BipoIarbear
      @BipoIarbear 5 років тому +1

      Robert Curtin I wasn’t drunk an I laughed my self wet

    • @danielantunovic459
      @danielantunovic459 5 років тому +3

      They clap when you do drugs because you have stopped doing them and pain can become funny in hindsight. But yes I agree in a fucked up way people would have still clapped if she said for example that she shot up heroin this morning.

  • @themightykyuss
    @themightykyuss 5 років тому +347

    "Shooting up in your neck is..um.. inconvenient." Lmao

    • @BothHands1
      @BothHands1 5 років тому +12

      ahhhh, I had a girl make me do this to her once, and she cooked up how much she said she was comfortable with, which I figured was ok b/c she was my dealer and she was hard in the paint, I figured she knew what she was doing. Girl nodded out before I could even get the rig outta her neck. Then she slumped over onto my lap. She was still breathing tho so I told her mom who was also home and also high on smack. She said she'd watch her, and ran to my car so I could get my fix. I had planned to do it in her bathroom but the whole ordeal shook me a bit. But even after watching her almost stop breathing in my lap, my first thought was when can I get this stuff in my arm. That stuff is horrible.

    • @kielgraves8104
      @kielgraves8104 5 років тому +2

      @@BothHands1 I know how you feel. After I got out of inpatient rehab the last time, this girl that I'd met when I was there convinced me to score for her (I didn't want to because she had a kid and still wasn't using). I was strung out already, and didn't have much money, and she told me she'd buy me a 20 if I scored for her, so I had to do it, I didn't have a choice. It was that or be sick. So I took her to my plug's house, got her a .1, that's it, that's all she got. She did half, and was like out of control fucked up, throwing up, nodding out, everything. So this happened again, 2 days later, same story, had to do it cuz she was gonna get me well too, so I tell her look do LESS than you did last time, remember how I had to babysit you? And this time we fixed at the dealer's house, this was my ONLY plug that would let me do that too. I turn around, turn back around and she shot the whole 20 and is blue in the face. I had to drag her to the bathroom and throw her in the shower with cold water and slap her over and over again, breathe for her, then get her talking until she could stand up on her own and keep her eyes open. Meanwhile my dealer's freaking out, her fucking little kid is freaking out cuz something crazy is happening, my dealer's pissed at me, I shotgunned her a few hits of meth hoping that would counteract it a little bit. I know when I've been close to falling out before I had prepared a shot of meth before I did the heroin, knowing that it was going to be a big one and my girl might need to hit me with it to wake me up, so I figured it couldn't hurt to try. That girl's lucky she's alive, there are lots of people out there that would have just let her die and say "oh well." I've overdosed twice myself, because I was on benzos and had no opiate tolerance, and was lucky enough that one of the people that was there (same person both times) had the nuts to do the right thing and get me to a hospital. Then some other people let him die in almost the exact same way. He was one of my closest friends, and a really good person. This shit can get really crazy, drugs are no joke.

    • @thomaspayne6866
      @thomaspayne6866 5 років тому

      How is this funny?!

    • @funkeediscotek
      @funkeediscotek 5 років тому

      @@BothHands1 Woah

    • @themightykyuss
      @themightykyuss 4 роки тому

      @@thomaspayne6866 it's the delivery that makes it funny to me.
      that being said, don't shoot up in your neck, kids.

  • @kilit8
    @kilit8 6 років тому +291

    Wow, one more proof that comedy = tragedy + time...

  • @nobigwhoopdawg
    @nobigwhoopdawg Рік тому +9

    This has got to be my favorite stand-up of all time.

  • @honeyrayen3549
    @honeyrayen3549 5 років тому +80

    Her timing and the way she sets up a joke is amazing!!!

  • @brittaolson6550
    @brittaolson6550 5 років тому +437

    Whenever I think my recovery story is getting a little too crazy, or I can’t get up from how far I fell, I just come back to, “Meth Pee.”

  • @TonyTMusicc
    @TonyTMusicc 6 років тому +386

    when she said "sippin on my pizzurp" my buddy literally threw up from laughing so hard

    • @squanchy666
      @squanchy666 6 років тому +12

      TonyT if he was on anything decent at the time he definitely should have then eaten it

    • @Lendog19v2
      @Lendog19v2 6 років тому +3

      You mean immediately before she picks up her glass & takes a sip?

  • @matthewwoods6526
    @matthewwoods6526 Рік тому +3

    She a real one! Thank you for letting me see/remember how comedic and ridiculous that lifestyle is/was! Thank you so much!

  • @reidflemming8458
    @reidflemming8458 6 років тому +715

    For being addicted to meth for 6 years she looks great.

    • @ryugo7713
      @ryugo7713 6 років тому +5

      Frank Stall for sure

    • @Smashy2009
      @Smashy2009 6 років тому +123

      @DewDiePie Bich Lasagna She said she was 27 when she went to drink piss at her sisters. The she says she has been clean for 12 years. So she is almost 40, looking pretty fine for that age.

    • @joysymonds8419
      @joysymonds8419 5 років тому +39

      Reid Flemming she got new teeth lol

    • @Vinnafetish
      @Vinnafetish 5 років тому +13

      Ikr she looks like she owns a minivan now and carpools the soccer team

    • @chair362
      @chair362 5 років тому +11

      @@Vinnafetish while secretly drinking wine from her "water bottle"

  • @ryanmccormick7387
    @ryanmccormick7387 6 років тому +2774

    For the love of God replace Amy Schumer with this woman

    • @blazejon
      @blazejon 6 років тому +36

      Or anyone

    • @user-rp2eo7fj9t
      @user-rp2eo7fj9t 6 років тому +3

      Ryan McCormick she looks like her

    • @patpowers9210
      @patpowers9210 6 років тому +10

      Ah, they're both great.

    • @rome415
      @rome415 6 років тому +5

      Yeah but she does not have an uncle Chuck Schumer. :(

    • @magisterrleth3129
      @magisterrleth3129 6 років тому +2

      She's so good. Her and Christina P.

  • @chustaproductions
    @chustaproductions 8 місяців тому +3

    to make it this rough, powerful and funny is a totally different skill than most comedians have. Give it up for Jessa Reed

  • @dougmarks1557
    @dougmarks1557 5 років тому +711

    I'm 35 years clean from crack, meth, and ketamine....

    • @TheLadyDelirium
      @TheLadyDelirium 5 років тому +17

      Well done. I'm genuinely happy for you.

    • @_ralph9524
      @_ralph9524 5 років тому +27

      TheLadyDelirium I think he’s 35 years old

    • @Tuffy0402
      @Tuffy0402 5 років тому +3

      @@_ralph9524 😁 I don't mean to laugh...or do I 🤔

    • @margaridabaldini
      @margaridabaldini 4 роки тому +2

      God bless your heart

    • @n1ck1930
      @n1ck1930 4 роки тому +12

      Ketamine ain’t bad bro

  • @nickcamileri
    @nickcamileri 6 років тому +35

    here's the thing.... don't ever listen to Jessa Reed. ...coz she is freaking AWESOME. .. and you won't want to stop watching her.

  • @michellemueller7288
    @michellemueller7288 5 років тому +36

    This is some funny shit!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
    Ps. I'm a recovering addict myself. Next month I've been ten years clean from opiates! ✊✊

  • @saleenz9643
    @saleenz9643 2 роки тому +12

    Jessa is SO strong, SO talented (that delivery, though), & f**king hilarious.
    I literally had to stop mid-step sometimes. 😅👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

  • @rockbottem77rl
    @rockbottem77rl 6 років тому +132

    Takes balls to tell this testimony on stage, funny as hell.

  • @saritasi7819
    @saritasi7819 6 років тому +32

    That was one of the funniest stand ups I ve seen this year. They need to give her a netflix special.

  • @terrib1934
    @terrib1934 6 років тому +126

    "98% meth capacity" LOL

  • @argosatori
    @argosatori 4 роки тому +60

    Jessa Reed 's story was originally called : ~"One Girl, No Cup"~

  • @kelcieglenn2088
    @kelcieglenn2088 5 років тому +36

    Her episode “Methistopheles” on Skeptic Tank was one of the best. So glad she got onto this show and that Ari created a show that showcases so many comedians that I would have otherwise prolly not heard of. Great platform of exposure for great comics. 👏🏼

  • @libramartin
    @libramartin 6 років тому +203

    more informative than most TED Talks xD

  • @rene8877
    @rene8877 6 років тому +60

    This is comedy. Raw and real. Personally, I've never done drugs, however, the insight and perspective is great/ sad/ scary. If I was considering giving it a go, this story is sick enough that hopefully, I'd not. But if the story is true, this is her life. She survived (many overdose and die). She's able to treat comedy like an AA meeting and be funny. As a survivor, she can be ashamed and crawl into a self made hole, or she can give an amazing testimony. And it doesn't matter to me if it's her story or someone else's story. It's brave, and it's a story that needs to be heard. wow!

    • @BenInSeattle
      @BenInSeattle 6 років тому +1

      They're her stories. There's an interview with her here: ua-cam.com/video/v75t0iUWLXE/v-deo.html

    • @dickrubber1728
      @dickrubber1728 6 років тому +2

      Rene, It's been my story for six years and I'm still looking for the humor. Not much in the way of humor here.

    • @fr0zdify
      @fr0zdify 6 років тому

      Lame, watch he on Berts podcast.

  • @SarahPriceMoore
    @SarahPriceMoore Рік тому +12

    “Hard to get a clean catch” will get me EVERY. TIME. 😂

    • @NedkaRokonokova
      @NedkaRokonokova 6 місяців тому +1

      In a public bathroom? Who knew? lol

  • @bonibon6669
    @bonibon6669 5 років тому +80

    Dude this was so dark and hilarious bravo

  • @StillStoney
    @StillStoney 5 років тому +406

    Sippn on some pizzurp.

  • @AjaOlander
    @AjaOlander 5 років тому +14

    If you’ve lived through that brand of crazy, you know how dead on this is. Probably one of the best bits I’ve ever seen. I’m glad to see someone that can get up and talk about it with the hilarity it deserves.

  • @ShirleyAnn-r4u
    @ShirleyAnn-r4u 4 місяці тому +1

    Best truthful relatable comedian I've came across jessa reed you're one of a kind . Thank you for making us heal through laughter