Jake Hill & Josh A - Suicidal Thoughts

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  • Опубліковано 22 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 16 тис.

  • @iamactuallyjakehill
    @iamactuallyjakehill  5 місяців тому +51

    on tour this summer! linktr.ee/jakehilltour

  • @hectictrolls6176
    @hectictrolls6176 3 роки тому +8608

    " Depression is like u don't wanna die , but also don't wanna exist "

    • @yeetskeet1581
      @yeetskeet1581 3 роки тому +206

      good quote but depression is many things, not just that. not disagreeing with your quote just pointing out that its a mental illness with many expressions

    • @iambackyo6803
      @iambackyo6803 3 роки тому +16

      Yup

    • @azzerith6339
      @azzerith6339 3 роки тому +12

      Yea

    • @animeedits3865
      @animeedits3865 3 роки тому +11

      @@yeetskeet1581 yea

    • @azzerith6339
      @azzerith6339 3 роки тому +3

      @@alexdaniel5641 how did you talk to me

  • @Melvolant
    @Melvolant 3 роки тому +3759

    When I was a kid, I thought crying out loud was the most pain ever thought of, but crying in silence is like killing yourself slowly of that which you have no control over.

    • @anonymouseidk1466
      @anonymouseidk1466 3 роки тому +37

      Well some people like to cry in silence and that some people is all of me I really want to cry right now it’s really hard to

    • @pcmkx
      @pcmkx 3 роки тому +9

      that hit😔

    • @kami0
      @kami0 3 роки тому +10

      sooo deeepppp maaaannnnnnnnn😭😭😭🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙😭😭😭😭😭😭🥲🥲🥲🥲😂🥺😂🥺😂😭😂🥺😂😭🥺

    • @pcmkx
      @pcmkx 3 роки тому +3

      @@kami0 different typa heartbreak 😮‍💨

    • @slewlovesu4408
      @slewlovesu4408 3 роки тому +1

      don't commit suicide that shit kills you..

  • @thegoldencompany4191
    @thegoldencompany4191 5 років тому +14621

    "Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright" who else felt that?
    (-) yall aint alone 🙏

  • @alteringtherealities1522
    @alteringtherealities1522 2 роки тому +341

    "I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright, but everyday I feel like dying." i relate to this way more than i should

    • @BirdTheCat
      @BirdTheCat 2 роки тому +5

      Same

    • @primisoda1400
      @primisoda1400 Рік тому +2

      lmao stop capping

    • @teiubids
      @teiubids 8 місяців тому

      Jesus loves you

    • @kenziebell-wu1re
      @kenziebell-wu1re 5 місяців тому

      Same and I'm 13

    • @madisonboysen-oq1cd
      @madisonboysen-oq1cd 4 місяці тому

      i feel you i relate to this whole song but the part were it says to F to killing my self bc ill just bottle it up some more tell the death of me

  • @extcmusic
    @extcmusic 4 роки тому +13345

    its funny how everyone who searches this song puts 'song' at the end to avoid some conversations lol

  • @kenzieberwick7462
    @kenzieberwick7462 5 років тому +4855

    "I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright" i felt that

    • @beefboss4203
      @beefboss4203 4 роки тому +45

      yeah same with all the shit going around the world and me fucking myself up even tho i keep telling myself to stop

    • @kenzieberwick7462
      @kenzieberwick7462 4 роки тому +5

      @@beefboss4203 yeh

    • @robbidyrob3787
      @robbidyrob3787 4 роки тому +8

      we felt that

    • @mymom3373
      @mymom3373 4 роки тому +17

      @@beefboss4203 I keep telling myself to stop watching something inappropriate on UA-cam. Every single time I do watch it I feel like dying. Like what the song said. ;(

    • @RAHHHHHHHH394
      @RAHHHHHHHH394 4 роки тому +17

      I felt that shit at the bottom of my shattered heart

  • @mimixz04
    @mimixz04 5 років тому +1108

    "just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright “

    • @mrzwonderful6205
      @mrzwonderful6205 5 років тому +12

      We all want to

    • @emelycorsino9791
      @emelycorsino9791 5 років тому +3

      Something we all know we want but yet something we all know isn't real 😔😭💔

    • @slothboy591
      @slothboy591 5 років тому +4

      I looked at ur comment while it played in the song at the same time

    • @jekjeklaron7008
      @jekjeklaron7008 5 років тому +2

      Its everyday bro yeah its everyday bro

    • @bisexualbonobo8616
      @bisexualbonobo8616 5 років тому +1

      FuryyyX every day i feel like dying

  • @spikips9375
    @spikips9375 3 роки тому +495

    I remember when i first heard this song when it came out. I was this really positive kid who never had depression before but still loved the beat and the song. 4 years later and a lot of shit after i saw this song and started to cry for some reason. At that moment i realised i've suffered through depression for a long time now but i never realised it. The lyrics just hit so deep.

    • @alexanderbrenner6953
      @alexanderbrenner6953 2 роки тому +7

      So true, once you read the lyrics then you will understand how he feels

    • @marcombr8371
      @marcombr8371 2 роки тому

      I just did the Same shit, i cant live more , i am 18 and i been thinking about suicide everyday since i am 15 , i legit just want to die or cut my veins

    • @jeffmcclelland3215
      @jeffmcclelland3215 2 роки тому +11

      the one thing I learned is that the person who has smiled the most times has also cried the most times.

    • @raptix5619
      @raptix5619 Рік тому +3

      You haven't gone trough depression if you need a song to realize it. You're not depressed if anything you may have small period where you are sad but youre definetely not depressed

    • @iwillbrb8723
      @iwillbrb8723 Рік тому +2

      @@raptix5619 oh my god thank you, liteerally everyone in these song comments are dumping their 'life story' but somehow they all were just never depressed before???? i can't stand it. It's like they WANT to be depressed because it's like a trend or something. It's bullshit.

  • @itsyaboisoup4616
    @itsyaboisoup4616 3 роки тому +1345

    2 years ago I was in high school I put this song on repeat because it represented how I felt. I was filled with depression and anxiety and it gotten so bad I resorted to drinking at school. I would’ve gotten kicked out if it weren’t for the personal issues I was dealing with at the time. But now I’m learning on how to control my anxiety and depression and how to live with it instead of being constantly haunted by it. If you’re ever going through anything just know you do have the strength to continue on and to never give up and Stay strong.

    • @BaileesWRLD
      @BaileesWRLD 3 роки тому +11

      How are you doing now

    • @joshuabatt137
      @joshuabatt137 3 роки тому +9

      Hey dude are you okay

    • @emilywilson1002
      @emilywilson1002 3 роки тому +8

      I hope your doing better now friend.

    • @stefhackgamatos5401
      @stefhackgamatos5401 3 роки тому +6

      Exactly

    • @colorstorm4136
      @colorstorm4136 3 роки тому +5

      Im in highschool too right now and i really feel this song. I have to do so many things that my life doesnt feel like its my life. I dont even know for what im alive

  • @chrissuper
    @chrissuper 7 років тому +575

    Lyrics (from what I hear, if I'm wrong feel free to correct me)
    I'm not suicidal, I don't wanna fuckin' die
    just wanna be able to close my eyes
    and feel alright, but every day I feel like dyin'
    every day I feel like dyin'
    Why do I even try, why do I even write
    lyrics about how I'm livin' the life
    when I'm battlin' pain
    and my demons at night
    trying to find a new outlet
    the devil pounced in
    I hear him howlin'
    my vision cloudin'
    man I tried to escape but there ain't no way
    try to be strong when I deal with the pain
    yah, but I'm ditchin' the coffin
    so my family has options
    gonna work till I'm dead
    so that they get the best
    don't wanna set up a bad example
    'cause kids lookin' up
    can't live with shambles
    can't let them think clockin' outs okay
    so fuck suicide I'm here to stay
    tried to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    wastin' all my time
    tryna find the light
    tried to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    wastin' all my time
    tryna find the light
    I'll be at it runnin'
    I'll be runnin' from myself now
    gunning demons down
    find my way out of the cell now
    I'll be runnin' oh
    I'll be runnin' from myself now
    gunning demons down
    find my way out of the cell now
    I'm not suicidal, I don't wanna fuckin' die
    just wanna be able to close my eyes
    and feel alright, but every day I feel like dyin'
    every day I feel like dyin'
    one too many bad thoughts inside me
    got a hole in my heart put the past behind me
    I'm pressed for time I'm stressed with life
    my breath is ice I guess I might just
    bottle it up some more just like always
    barely stand to crawl down the hallways
    sink into my bed, with death inside my head
    That note you found, I didn't mean it
    just wish I had a better sense of meaning
    never meant to let you down
    I've been down and out
    erasing thoughts, I had to drown 'em out FUCK
    Never givin' in I swear to god
    no matter how many times I pray to a god
    that I don't believe in, just to see if I'll never wake up
    but he called my bluff
    tried to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    wastin' all my time
    tryna find the light
    tried to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    wastin' all my time
    tryna find the light
    I'll be at it runnin'
    I'll be runnin' from myself now
    gunning demons down
    find my way out of the cell now
    I'll be runnin' oh
    I'll be runnin' from myself now
    gunning demons down
    find my way out of the cell now
    I'm not suicidal, I don't wanna fuckin' die
    just wanna be able to close my eyes
    and feel alright, but every day I feel like dyin'
    every day I feel like dyin'
    *I'm not suicidal, I don't wanna fuckin' die* (distorted)
    *just wanna be able to close my eyes*
    *and feel alright, but every day I feel like dyin'*
    *every day I feel like dyin'*
    If anyone has suicidal thoughts or if you just don't think that you're good enough, please call the suicidal prevention hotline
    like the song says, "fuck suicide I'm here to stay" everyone has a purpose and a place in life, bad things happen to everyone and we just gotta fight through it!
    1-800-273-8255

    • @nesss99
      @nesss99 7 років тому +5

      Upvote

    • @TazSRT7
      @TazSRT7 7 років тому +15

      pin this shit!

    • @brandonmacintosh9698
      @brandonmacintosh9698 7 років тому +9

      I'll be runnin' from myself now
      gunning demons down, find my way out of the cell now
      Kinda sounds like this in the part where you put (IDK)

    • @Zuignap
      @Zuignap 7 років тому +14

      I think "but he caught me bluff" should be "but he called my bluff" at (2:00)

    • @chrissuper
      @chrissuper 7 років тому +1

      Brandon MacIntosh Yeah now I can hear it, I fixed it.

  • @thelunasalpha4338
    @thelunasalpha4338 5 років тому +766

    What they say: it will get better
    What they mean: you’ll get used to the pain

    • @torihoskinson562
      @torihoskinson562 5 років тому +6

      That is very true and that's sad

    • @18rxfi
      @18rxfi 5 років тому +4

      Hits different

    • @AyhamSpaceE
      @AyhamSpaceE 5 років тому +1

      Yoongi makes me always smile.. (:

    • @sleepyashie
      @sleepyashie 5 років тому +2

      Damn that hit

    • @introjkjm9350
      @introjkjm9350 5 років тому +4

      It’s true but let’s try to love ourselves :)

  • @CatPCgaming
    @CatPCgaming 3 роки тому +348

    Honestly, this is the most relatable song I've found in awhile.

    • @echospace7347
      @echospace7347 2 роки тому +3

      Listen to more music by him

    • @VANCOF_NOT_ALIVE
      @VANCOF_NOT_ALIVE Рік тому +1

      Listen to citizen soldier

    • @abelmartinez3196
      @abelmartinez3196 10 місяців тому +1

      Listen to bullet by Hollywood undead

    • @damianmontiel6364
      @damianmontiel6364 10 місяців тому

      Yeah

    • @SADxDUCK1991
      @SADxDUCK1991 5 місяців тому

      youd hate my playlists then .... i wish youtube never threw them videos at me , especially considering now they are skipping songs and fking with my playlists ....
      p.s. is there a way to stop that , do you know ?

  • @zoyanavidhassan
    @zoyanavidhassan 4 роки тому +2042

    when you want people to stop hurting you but then you realize you're the one hurting yourself

  • @blissconnect_
    @blissconnect_ 3 роки тому +3892

    [Jake Hill:]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    [Josh A:]
    Why do I even try?
    Why do I even write lyrics about how I'm living the life when I'm battling pain and my demons at night
    Trying to find a new outlet
    The devil pounced in
    I hear him howling, my vision clouded
    Man I tried to escape but there ain't no way
    Try to be strong when I deal with the pain
    (Yuh) Put a bitch in the coffin, so my family has options
    Gonna work till' I'm dead
    So that they get the best
    Don't wanna set up a bad example cause' kids looking up
    Can't leave them in shambles can't make them think clocking out is ok
    So fuck suicide I'm here to stay
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    (Nah, nah)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Jake Hill:]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    One too many bad thoughts inside me
    Got a hole in my heart put the past behind me
    I'm pressed with time, I'm stressed with life, my breath is ice
    I guess I might just bottle it up some more just like always
    Barely standing, crawling down the hallways
    Sink into my bed, with death inside my head
    (Yeah) That note you found I didn't mean it
    Just wish I had a better sense of meaning
    Never meant to let you down
    I've been down now racing thoughts had to drown them out
    (Fuck)
    Never giving in I swear to God, no matter how many times I pray to a God
    I don't believe in just to see if I will never wake up
    But he called my bluff
    [Josh A:]
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    (Nah, nah)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Jake Hill:]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    (Muffled)
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)

  • @sonam9881
    @sonam9881 5 років тому +980

    *"Why do I even try?"*
    This speaks to me on so many levels

  • @Matteyjanable
    @Matteyjanable 3 роки тому +50

    This fucking song hits home... Damn... 28 years saying fuck it I will stay. And now this song pops up and BAM I cry. This shit hit home hard.

  • @petestunken
    @petestunken 6 років тому +3007

    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna f*cking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    [Verse 1: Josh A]
    Why do I even try?
    Why do I even write lyrics about how I'm living the life when I'm battling pain and my demons at night
    Trying to find a new outlet
    The devil pouncin'
    I hear him howling, my vision clouded
    Man I tried to escape but there ain't no way
    Try to be strong when I deal with the pain (yuh)
    But I'm ditching the coffin, so my family has options
    Gotta work till' I'm dead
    So that they get the best
    Don't wanna set up a bad example cause the kids looking up
    Can't leave in shambles can't make them think clocking out's ok
    So f*ck suicide I'm here to stay
    [Bridge: Josh A]
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, tryna find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, tryna find the light
    (nah, man)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Chorus: Jake Hill]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna f*cking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    [Verse 2: Jake Hill]
    One too many bad thoughts inside me
    Got a hole in my heart put the past behind me
    I'm pressed with time, I'm stressed with life, my breath is ice
    I guess I might just bottle it up some more just like always
    Barely standing, crawling down the hallways
    Sink into my bed, with death inside my head
    (Yeah) That note you found I didn't mean it
    Just wish I had a better sense of meaning
    Never meant to let you down
    I've been down now racing thoughts had to drown them out
    (f*ck)
    Never giving in I swear to god, no matter how many times I pray to a god
    I don't believe in just to see if I will never wake up
    But he called my bluff
    [Bridge: Josh A]
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, tryna find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, tryna find the light
    (nah, man)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Outro: Jake Hill]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna f*cking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    (Muffled)
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna f*cking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)

  • @shadowishere7115
    @shadowishere7115 4 роки тому +2463

    Nobody wants to die they just wanna be free from the pain...

    • @cristianbarbu6347
      @cristianbarbu6347 3 роки тому +20

      Pills are better 😬!

    • @stephensmith3184
      @stephensmith3184 3 роки тому +30

      Or just not exist...

    • @bxmbxr
      @bxmbxr 3 роки тому +3

      ...

    • @catkin8330
      @catkin8330 3 роки тому +12

      I do want to be free from pain
      It's not even about someone abusing me (like my brother but it is one thing) the main thing that keeps harassing me the main thought...
      Is how I use to HURT my friends I lost control of my anger and harm them, looking at them... They remind me of myself (here come their names)
      I was as ignorant as Leo
      As Annoying as Molly
      As naive as Serena
      And as soft as Caitlin
      I could easily be hurt lost control and hurt my friends... I was ignorant and didn't realise how bad I was... I was annoying...I was a monster but im trying to improve and I did, but they don't see it... If they only saw or hear how much they mean to me... I hurt them so I tried importing ITS FOR THEM which I became better... For them! They don't know that... It was them who took me out of the darkness, now I just try to smile so brightly that it blinds the darkness so I will be here even if my friends turn against me... Everyone makes their own purpose of living... My one is to protect my friends even if it would cost my life, because they are everything to me... I wish I could tell them this but I can't... I just can't...

    • @user-ig6qc7pv6t
      @user-ig6qc7pv6t 3 роки тому +1

      Ama bjk hala küçük kulüp 😭😭😭

  • @hahockey6842
    @hahockey6842 5 років тому +2398

    Me:Gets depression
    Family: *its from being on that PC all day*

  • @car2see163
    @car2see163 2 роки тому +119

    “Sleep isn’t just sleep anymore, it’s your best escape from reality”

    • @TheVeryMrSirJosh
      @TheVeryMrSirJosh 2 роки тому +3

      Felt that

    • @taurushere6380
      @taurushere6380 2 роки тому

      yeah

    • @art3m1z92
      @art3m1z92 2 роки тому +4

      Sleeping is like being dead just without the commitment

    • @teiubids
      @teiubids 8 місяців тому +2

      Jesus loves you 😊

    • @Whocares158
      @Whocares158 8 місяців тому

      I always look forward to Sleep it's the only way of knowing true peace.

  • @xtaniwhax9655
    @xtaniwhax9655 5 років тому +2688

    Me: **gets mild depression**
    Everyone in my family: its those pesky headphones

    • @yernef350
      @yernef350 5 років тому +41

      If you only listen to sad songs yeah its those pesky headphones ^^

    • @xtaniwhax9655
      @xtaniwhax9655 5 років тому +126

      @@yernef350 that's not how it works, I listen to sad songs cause I can relate to them, it's not the music or headphones it's the shitty people at school and my messed up family

    • @yernef350
      @yernef350 5 років тому +27

      @@xtaniwhax9655 The music doesnt help it also puts you in a certain mood, theres actual research behind, for example a lower bpm will tend to make you sad and a higher bpm will make you happier. So it also does, i didnt mean its all of it.

    • @xtaniwhax9655
      @xtaniwhax9655 5 років тому +42

      @@yernef350 it does help
      This is a sad song so I'll be sad and happy another time and if your such a no it all about happiness then what the hell are you doing here in this depressed side of UA-cam

    • @xtaniwhax9655
      @xtaniwhax9655 5 років тому +13

      @@yernef350... Sorry

  • @xjsmykxx_1240
    @xjsmykxx_1240 4 роки тому +892

    [Hook: Jake Hill]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    [Verse 1: Josh A]
    Why do I even try?
    Why do I even write lyrics about how I'm living the life when I'm battling pain and my demons at night
    Trying to find a new outlet
    The devil pounced in
    I hear him howling, my vision clouded
    Man I tried to escape but there ain't no way
    Try to be strong when I deal with the pain
    (yuh) Put a bitch in the coffin, so my family has options
    Gonna work till' I'm dead
    So that they get the best
    Don't wanna set up a bad example cause' kids looking up
    Can't leave them in shambles can't make them think clocking out is ok
    So fuck suicide I'm here to stay
    [Chorus: Josh A]
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    (nah, nah)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Hook: Jake Hill]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    [Verse 2: Jake Hill]
    One too many bad thoughts inside me
    Got a hole in my heart put the past behind me
    I'm pressed with time, I'm stressed with life, my breath is ice
    I guess I might just bottle it up some more just like always
    Barely standing, crawling down the hallways
    Sink into my bed, with death inside my head
    (Yeah) That note you found I didn't mean it
    Just wish I had a better sense of meaning
    Never meant to let you down
    I've been down now racing thoughts had to drown them out
    (Fuck)
    Never giving in I swear to god, no matter how many times I pray to a god
    I don't believe in just to see if I will never wake up
    But he called my bluff
    [Chorus: Josh A]
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    Try to free my mind
    I don't know what's right
    Wasting all my time, trying to find the light
    (nah, nah)
    I'll be out here running, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down find my way out of this cell now
    I'll be running now, I'll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down, find my way out of this cell now
    [Outro: Jake Hill]
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)
    (Muffled)
    I'm not suicidal I don't wanna fucking die
    Just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But every day I feel like dying
    Every day I feel like dying (dying...)

    • @horfallwest1865
      @horfallwest1865 4 роки тому +7

      Thank you

    • @zashinunes8191
      @zashinunes8191 4 роки тому +2

      Up

    • @quelquunquelquepart2845
      @quelquunquelquepart2845 4 роки тому +8

      Thx a lot, for a french guy it's not easy to follow him ! 😅

    • @quelquunquelquepart2845
      @quelquunquelquepart2845 4 роки тому +6

      (I don't even know if my sentence make sense... And same for this one... Yeah, french people are fuckingly bad in English...)

    • @takumi6216
      @takumi6216 4 роки тому +2

      Quelqu'un quelque part effectivement ptdr , Même si mon niveau en anglais et quand même pas mal pour une jeune fille de 12 ans , j’ai du mal à entendre dans les musiques ou le son passe avant les vocalises si tu vois ce que je veux dire xD

  • @Maisxxn
    @Maisxxn 6 років тому +820

    This song speaks to me on a personal level because being depressed without a reason can be worse than having a reason because then you’re constantly searching for that reason then you find more causes and more and more until your first memory then realise you don’t know then think you’re just a joke so I relate to this song on a personal level

    • @twincardinal5649
      @twincardinal5649 6 років тому +32

      Its the worst being depressed for no reason cause there is no solution that is clear, just lean on family and friends, they help a lot, your not alone.

    • @gracenolikeu9969
      @gracenolikeu9969 6 років тому +14

      I honestly feel the same way for a while I though if it was just wanting attention or something but I know that’s not me so idk i relate to this song to on a personal level and don’t talk about it with anyone to seem like it’s just for attention cause idek myself what is wrong

    • @shawnpiercd5329
      @shawnpiercd5329 6 років тому +3

      #BillieEllie 😐 facts tho

    • @mozard8304
      @mozard8304 6 років тому

      What

    • @stefankriminskiy9977
      @stefankriminskiy9977 6 років тому +5

      me too, i lost a game in league of legends

  • @yemliha5170
    @yemliha5170 3 роки тому +192

    Why are these songs not getting the recognition they deserve?

  • @SectionC970
    @SectionC970 6 років тому +216

    "I'll be running from myself now" Jeeeez that's a new level of depression.

    • @aalex6394
      @aalex6394 6 років тому +2

      Ahmad Amjed oof

    • @holidayodell5000
      @holidayodell5000 6 років тому +10

      I have been for a while bruh get on my level

    • @radioaudio69
      @radioaudio69 6 років тому +3

      Ahmad Amjed Welcome to My Brain. Enjoy your stay.

    • @imgay6885
      @imgay6885 6 років тому +1

      I've been on that level of depression since I was 8, I'm 12 now.

    • @SectionC970
      @SectionC970 6 років тому

      @@imgay6885 holy... it seems I'm just out of this Earth cuz God dam your 8 to 12 depressed? Hope you feel good some day bud all support.

  • @asrieldreemurr5073
    @asrieldreemurr5073 6 років тому +766

    I told my friend once that i'm depressed and he was just like "Just be happy"
    Smh

    • @thevzil9462
      @thevzil9462 6 років тому +46

      Cam L
      depression isn’t just sadness 😐

    • @jonipihvi
      @jonipihvi 6 років тому +28

      just smile lmao

    • @legoyoda256
      @legoyoda256 6 років тому +19

      @@jonipihvi dont be sad lmao

    • @MagicNote
      @MagicNote 6 років тому +14

      ikr? like OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ADVICE?? THANK YOU SO MUCH!! NOW I'M GOING AND BEING HAPPY :))))))))))))))))))))))

    • @yee2494
      @yee2494 6 років тому +6

      See a fucking doctor if your depressed

  • @engineer2323
    @engineer2323 5 років тому +4229

    00:13 her defasında ''Anasını satayım'' diyecek sanıyorum

  • @lolichicken5373
    @lolichicken5373 2 роки тому +139

    I wish I could close my eyes and open them again to find my self in a better world

  • @levantinedoomer2317
    @levantinedoomer2317 5 років тому +470

    *Social anxiety has joined the server* and you can Never leave...

  • @HelpMe-pw8qu
    @HelpMe-pw8qu 4 роки тому +194

    "I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright, but everyday I feel like dying, everyday I feel like dying..."
    I actually felt that.

    • @MariaVasquez-ws3qp
      @MariaVasquez-ws3qp 4 роки тому

      Help Me : same here to

    • @GhostBouDB
      @GhostBouDB 4 роки тому +1

      We’re with you on that one.

    • @zxylon959
      @zxylon959 4 роки тому

      Same dude

    • @emilygyulumyan4373
      @emilygyulumyan4373 4 роки тому +2

      I lost my best friend, he's dead, i don't feel anything i don't want to live anymore, i haven't motivation i don't see something good in life

    • @malikirose979
      @malikirose979 4 роки тому

      normal people: "your fine, get over yourself, there is nothing wrong with you"
      me: your why i feel like this

  • @de4dg1rl73
    @de4dg1rl73 4 роки тому +3190

    I wanna die, but at the same time. I feel like, I dont wanna die

    • @zashinunes8191
      @zashinunes8191 4 роки тому +7

      🙇🏻‍♂️

    • @discodude4231
      @discodude4231 4 роки тому +19

      youll get over it i did

    • @web9452
      @web9452 4 роки тому +50

      Dont end it. What if there is nothing after? Make the best of what you can while alive. Be a good person and hopefully there is a god and an afterlife. But if there isnt atleast make what time you have here the best possible.

    • @nteachristou3909
      @nteachristou3909 4 роки тому +4

      Don't

    • @nifou5677
      @nifou5677 4 роки тому +4

      Same

  • @chinharry8746
    @chinharry8746 Рік тому +18

    The fact that it shows a suicidal warning just shows how powerful it is.

  • @crowofjudgement8810
    @crowofjudgement8810 3 роки тому +506

    This song is aggressively telling me that everything will be ok... And I'm completely ok with that, be safe everyone you'll be ok no matter how hard life may seem stay strong 🙏

    • @zyrexnotpyrex3205
      @zyrexnotpyrex3205 3 роки тому +1

      No :(

    • @Br34dL04f
      @Br34dL04f 3 роки тому +8

      Sadly, my hope died. Only thing left to me is my internet friends. Only people who supports me without saying "It's your fault", "You are annoying", "If you are that emotional then you have to be in mental hospital" like my family doing.

    • @gerardwayseyelash
      @gerardwayseyelash 3 роки тому +1

      @@Br34dL04f Are you doing okay?

    • @Br34dL04f
      @Br34dL04f 3 роки тому +3

      @@gerardwayseyelash Not really. I want to die for months and having panic attacks about death at the same time. Im getting annoyed by everything and feel like soon I gonna cut my veins even more.

    • @johnthicc865
      @johnthicc865 2 роки тому +1

      @@Br34dL04f bro I went through this I cut my veins too but just trust me there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. I know it's very hard cuz I know how it feels but just... Believe in yourself and you will make it through ❤️

  • @boneshd_6133
    @boneshd_6133 5 років тому +150

    “That note you found I didn’t mean it”
    Wow that actually just happened to me this past week
    This song is so relatable

    • @proskillzoverforthelolol
      @proskillzoverforthelolol 5 років тому +3

      Lmao pussssy

    • @beanking3668
      @beanking3668 5 років тому +9

      pro skillz over 9000 for the lolol
      You are a bad person.

    • @madamelovelace9545
      @madamelovelace9545 5 років тому +8

      @@proskillzoverforthelolol bitch please. everyone has shit to deal with, you shouldn't comment this. let them have emotions. holy fuck

    • @Dude-ng3gy
      @Dude-ng3gy 5 років тому +2

      Madame Lovelace
      He’s a troll, leave him alone. He’ll fuck off eventually.

    • @tikimtz8131
      @tikimtz8131 5 років тому

      Faxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • @nosanitypx2282
    @nosanitypx2282 5 років тому +22031

    Roses are dead
    Violets are dying
    Depression aint no joke
    Many kids are crying

  • @daisythereaper3336
    @daisythereaper3336 2 роки тому +12

    This is what my anxiety and my depression does to me it actually makes me feel numb and i hate it it makes me feel like i want to live i love this lyric though cause it kept me alive for 18 years so far "just wanna be able to close my eyes and be able to feel alright but everyday i feel like dying" also at the end of the day i have to cry myself to sleep cause of it :(

  • @ktqkudra4313
    @ktqkudra4313 3 роки тому +5080

    2 mins. Silence for those who still can't find this song, after hearing 1st time by chance!!

  • @null8319
    @null8319 7 років тому +129

    "Just wanna be able to close my eyes and just feel alright"

  • @Thatcharmingjokester
    @Thatcharmingjokester 3 роки тому +696

    This song is the definition of how I feel every day.

    • @alexdanieloliveira2294
      @alexdanieloliveira2294 3 роки тому +12

      If you need help Go talk to your friends, family and People you Trust, Life can Be Great full of Good memories and experiences and Will get even better after the pandemic ends so do not waste it, If necessary search for help in the internet and If you can afford it call a therapist "ending your Life is a permanent solution for a temporary problem" so many People that tried to end it changed their minds and are glad to Be alive,. we all have the dark chapter of our lives but you can pass through it by the way do not Be shy to call for help

    • @Thatcharmingjokester
      @Thatcharmingjokester 3 роки тому +6

      @@alexdanieloliveira2294 I know. And thank you. I'm not gonna die, I can assure you that

    • @BrailleGamer04
      @BrailleGamer04 2 роки тому +3

      yep same here

    • @sharkloverlife4820
      @sharkloverlife4820 2 роки тому +3

      Same

    • @BrailleGamer04
      @BrailleGamer04 2 роки тому +2

      yep mee too

  • @robertmacdermid456
    @robertmacdermid456 3 роки тому +20

    “I’m not suicidal I don’t wanna f*cking die just wanna close my eyes and feel alright’’

  • @goranschkreblin8769
    @goranschkreblin8769 5 років тому +2812

    When my mom asks me whats wrong i just say im tired because i dont have the heart to say the lady who gave me life that i dont want it nomore

    • @sosiiaa6371
      @sosiiaa6371 5 років тому +189

      Bro,you destroy my heart right now

    • @ryahacorn806
      @ryahacorn806 5 років тому +23

      Goran Škreblin facts :(

    • @daboiiz6266
      @daboiiz6266 5 років тому +24

      @@goranschkreblin8769 ik man just keep living it

    • @kostass.1023
      @kostass.1023 5 років тому +54

      same dude...we just waiting and waiting..but until when?

    • @RogueWRLD999
      @RogueWRLD999 5 років тому +6

      @@goranschkreblin8769 it is😖

  • @quickerblazelol4367
    @quickerblazelol4367 5 років тому +2470

    I’m not suicidal
    I don’t wanna f*cking die
    I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But everyday I feel like dying
    Everyday I feel like dying
    Why do I even try
    Why do I even write lyrics about how I’m living the life
    When I’m battling pain and my demons at night
    Trying to find a new outlet
    The devil pouncing
    I here him howling
    My vision clouding
    Man I try to escape but there aint no way
    Try to be strong when I deal with the pain
    Yah But I’m ditching the coffin
    So my family has options
    Gonna work till I’m dead
    So that they get the best
    Don’t wanna set up a bad example
    Cause kids looking up can’t leave in shambles
    Can’t make them think clocking out is ok
    So f*ck suicide I’m here to stay
    Try to free my mind
    I don’t know what’s right
    Wasting all my time
    Trying to find a light
    Try to free my mind
    I don’t know what’s right
    Wasting all my time
    Trying to find a light
    All be out here running
    All be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down
    Find my way out of this hell now
    All be running now
    All be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down
    Find my way out of this hell now
    I’m not suicidal
    I don’t wanna f*cking die
    I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But everyday I feel like dying
    Everyday I feel like dying
    One too many bad thoughts inside me
    Got a hole in my heart
    Put the past behind me
    I’m pressed for time
    I’m stressed with life
    My breath is ice
    I guess I might just
    bottle it up some more
    Just like always
    Barely stand I crawl down the hallway
    Sink into my bed
    with death inside my head
    That note you found I didn’t mean it
    Just wish I had a better sense of meaning
    Never meant to let you down
    I’ve been down and out
    Racing thoughts I had to drown them out
    F*ck
    Never giving in
    I swear to god no matter how many times I pray to a god
    I don’t believe in
    Just to see if i would never wake up
    But he called my bluff
    Try to free my mind
    I don’t know what’s right
    Wasting all my time
    Trying to find a light
    Try to free my mind
    I don’t know what’s right
    Wasting all my time
    Trying to find a light
    No, no
    I’ll be out here running
    I’ll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down
    Find my way out of this hell now
    I’ll be running now
    I’ll be running from myself now
    Gunning demons down
    Find my way out of this hell now
    I’m not suicidal
    I don’t wanna f*cking die
    I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But everyday I feel like dying
    Everyday I feel like dying
    (I’m not suicidal
    I don’t wanna f*cking die
    I just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright
    But everyday I feel like dying
    Everyday I feel like dying)

    • @decoupage298o07
      @decoupage298o07 5 років тому +4

      wow nc

    • @Gracie_3271
      @Gracie_3271 5 років тому +13

      Thank you , that’s some long lyrics lol

    • @quickerblazelol4367
      @quickerblazelol4367 5 років тому +5

      Mermaid Elizabeth look at the song Suicide Forest and go down and you’ll see other lyrics I put there :)

    • @00leondre
      @00leondre 5 років тому +9

      youre a god

    • @quickerblazelol4367
      @quickerblazelol4367 5 років тому +3

      TweaZy why thank you

  • @FortniteKid
    @FortniteKid 6 років тому +10765

    I showed this to my grass now it's weed

    • @kleiton__
      @kleiton__ 6 років тому +233

      mine's dead

    • @oneasianman688
      @oneasianman688 6 років тому +18

      ua-cam.com/video/6Dh-RL__uN4/v-deo.html

    • @ilai1215
      @ilai1215 6 років тому +66

      I am trying to figure the fuck out what you writong i am high af rn

    • @casiopea12
      @casiopea12 6 років тому +47

      Mine caught on fire 🔥

    • @gngsehit
      @gngsehit 6 років тому +10

      sTeAlEd

  • @zealot1111
    @zealot1111 3 роки тому +110

    2 years ago i was suicidal and used to hear this song a lot. But somehow i saved myself from it. But now, here i am, back again.

    • @johnthicc865
      @johnthicc865 2 роки тому +14

      Same. But I have learned one thing. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem I heard those words from my therapist and we'll basically that's what has kept me going. So just stay strong and you will make it.❤️

    • @subahanqutubuddini235
      @subahanqutubuddini235 2 роки тому +1

      Me too. 2 years ago. But I'm good now. I never lost hope

    • @yazenalmafalani4138
      @yazenalmafalani4138 2 роки тому +2

      Hope you’re doing better now man

    • @escolarianaccountLASPINAS
      @escolarianaccountLASPINAS 2 роки тому

      Good for you my g

    • @Goobert234
      @Goobert234 Рік тому

      you got this man!

  • @x4x_shadow_x4x66
    @x4x_shadow_x4x66 7 років тому +170

    I respect this song. It has a great meaning and there’s not a lot of songs that I can relate to when I’m depressed cuz there either about killing yourself (which I have no intentions on doing) or is just a sad story type of song. But this song is just one of those unique songs that I can really relate to and which is why I have so much respect for this song

    • @SundewRed
      @SundewRed 7 років тому +3

      x4x_Shadow_x4x Judging by what you want, you may want to check out some of the older twenty one pilots songs. Some of them touch on suicide, but stuff from Regional at Best and their self titled album might be your cup of tea. Check out songs like fall away or clear if you like the rap stuff.

    • @OhItsKobi
      @OhItsKobi 6 років тому +2

      Not everyone wants to be on medication and not everyone who feels depressed needs it. There is a difference between feeling down and actually having depression that requires medical assessment.

    • @OhItsKobi
      @OhItsKobi 6 років тому +3

      Shadow, I agree. This song describes how I feel almost everyday. I think about suicide almost daily but it's not like I want to go plan my death, sometimes I just want to not exist, or wish that I never did exist.
      It's hard to explain to someone who never experiences that.

    • @elainegreen3523
      @elainegreen3523 6 років тому

      I experience that everyday

  • @PuffDaGoat
    @PuffDaGoat 5 років тому +742

    _i just want a hug •~•_

    • @unfed-amg
      @unfed-amg 5 років тому +8

      Same

    • @outis8159
      @outis8159 4 роки тому +21

      I know it doesn't mean a lot, but here's a spiritual hug (◍•ᴗ•◍)

    • @hiddenkensho8780
      @hiddenkensho8780 4 роки тому +19

      Puff -_- i just want this girl to love me the way i love her

    • @lucky_luke20030
      @lucky_luke20030 4 роки тому +6

      Ghost hug, you cant feel it but it's there \^-^/

    • @Internetuser435
      @Internetuser435 4 роки тому +2

      🤗 here

  • @lubomir8619
    @lubomir8619 6 років тому +568

    its a shame that this guy and x will never collab, a big shame

    • @d1rekt869
      @d1rekt869 6 років тому +17

      thank you now im about to cry

    • @corpseriot_
      @corpseriot_ 6 років тому +5

      Стильный паркер awww they would have been a good collaboration 😪

    • @tillyrobyn5763
      @tillyrobyn5763 6 років тому +12

      Sean Sparandero you cant call all feminists fucking idiots because 20 or so women and some men said he beat his wife,feminists fight for equal rights,extreme feminists are the ones that take it too far

    • @jacobbaldridge4451
      @jacobbaldridge4451 6 років тому +9

      @Sean Sparandero he actually did beat his wife 😂

    • @nothing.9484
      @nothing.9484 6 років тому +2

      Ikr X'C

  • @dablord6745
    @dablord6745 Рік тому +1

    1:11 running from myself is such a perfect description...healing becomes pretty hard tho... for all the Men out there feel appreciated keep up the work and Stop hide the shit inside you!!! No need to die from Emotions that you hide...

  • @333doom
    @333doom 5 років тому +492

    90% of comments are:
    "Sad gang where you at?" and "I'm not sad I'm depressed."
    10% of the comments are:
    "Great song"

  • @cosmeticstew244
    @cosmeticstew244 6 років тому +1115

    So close to 1 mil
    Edit: we did it, Jake you deserve it

    • @dankable8593
      @dankable8593 6 років тому +3

      You mean 100K right?

    • @UnYoYT
      @UnYoYT 6 років тому +13

      he meant views

    • @logancrout
      @logancrout 6 років тому +3

      Yo getting close to 2mil lets get it!!!

    • @HighGuy69
      @HighGuy69 6 років тому +1

      1.8mil my dude

    • @janhenrik4170
      @janhenrik4170 6 років тому +5

      Dankable you're stupid

  • @crowsinaden742
    @crowsinaden742 5 років тому +3074

    The saddest thing is... the entire new generation is depressed but the past generation doesn't understand

    • @しくじも
      @しくじも 5 років тому +89

      yeah, no, thats bullshit

    • @THATONEM1N3CR4FT3R
      @THATONEM1N3CR4FT3R 5 років тому +9

      lol no

    • @THATONEM1N3CR4FT3R
      @THATONEM1N3CR4FT3R 5 років тому +32

      @I like 2K sounds like depression to me

    • @newb2676
      @newb2676 5 років тому +70

      @I like 2K No, many of kids, especially ones my age, romanticize things like depression and so therefore a great many are in this romanticized depression than a real depression. I hear "oh I'm so depressed" all the time though they seem perfectly fine and content with themselves.

    • @yourlocalstinkbug1145
      @yourlocalstinkbug1145 5 років тому +19

      I was lucky my dad had severe depression and took meds for it so he took my depression and anxiety very seriously

  • @Luna_Lilith01
    @Luna_Lilith01 8 місяців тому +4

    Been listening to this banger since I was 13 and id listen and cry alone. and now I'm 21 and I still cry. I'm tired and although my life is different now, I still feel depressed even tho I'm on antidepressants and this crippling mental health issues keep racking up and I feel like I'm slowly going insane 🥲

    • @espinoname2988
      @espinoname2988 6 місяців тому

      I get you, I'm 25 and I've also had issues since 13. Although for me its improved between 15-19 and then started going worse and worse. I also sometimes feel like I'm slowly going crazy and get scared of myself. I hope that with time we can both get to feel better. I send you all my strength and best wishes. ❤💪🏻

  • @11skylars
    @11skylars 5 років тому +534

    **gets grounded for thinking about suicide**

    • @rawr9977
      @rawr9977 5 років тому +28

      Wth , they need to be slapped

    • @tylersinclair5167
      @tylersinclair5167 5 років тому +25

      #relatable and for cutting

    • @some__kid
      @some__kid 5 років тому +20

      Yeah my dad just gets mad at me whenever I cut myself. That's why when I relapsed earlier I never reached out. I'll just get punished

    • @Eli-ld1vg
      @Eli-ld1vg 5 років тому +24

      DUDE MY MOM TOOK MY PHONE AWAY FOR SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND CUTTING WTF

    • @tylersinclair5167
      @tylersinclair5167 5 років тому +3

      @@Eli-ld1vg same. Love the name

  • @no-mk1yc
    @no-mk1yc 6 років тому +508

    I'm not usually a fan of rap but this is really fuckin good

  • @ghostimilkies6740
    @ghostimilkies6740 4 роки тому +63

    My parents recently ended their relationship and I am about 12... I have to be there for my brother at the end of the day... I had to promise my father I wouldn't give up on him. This song really helps me get through everything, thank you.

    • @whitefang2925
      @whitefang2925 4 роки тому +11

      Hey kid ... I know things are tough right now. I won't pretend to understand your home situation and how you feel, but as someone who's family still has both parents who are constantly clawing at each other's throats ... maybe it's for the best. Nevertheless, I hope you and your Dad are doing alright. I know things stark right now, but someday, things will get better.

    • @danielvillavilla7749
      @danielvillavilla7749 3 роки тому +4

      ay man as someone whose lived with this shit since like 1 ik how it feels man just its gonna be tough i cant lie but as long as u got ur brother and hes got u u can get through this ight my brother is the reason i didnt crumble when that happened to u man just keep ur head up man ight

    • @ТолибжановХусен
      @ТолибжановХусен 3 роки тому +2

      I hope u ar doing alright if yes, say smth.

    • @Femtanyls_biggest_fan
      @Femtanyls_biggest_fan 3 роки тому

      Month or two, you will be ok bro its normal these times

  • @Bullmann55
    @Bullmann55 2 роки тому +14

    5 year anniversary and it still helps me cope

  • @Joshua47
    @Joshua47 7 років тому +81

    This song is genius. It’s one of those songs where you want to play it on repeat 24/7
    But you know if you do
    You’ll ruin it for yourself

    • @mmmcrackers6290
      @mmmcrackers6290 7 років тому +2

      Joshua 47 I’ve already listened to it 26 times...I counted. This song never gets old on my opinion lmao

    • @axmoylotl
      @axmoylotl 7 років тому +4

      on reapeaat for like 2 hours now, i'm drawing, and, i'm kidna going insane but it's still good.

    • @NukeHead
      @NukeHead 7 років тому +1

      Man, I’m writing raps to this song. (About 1 hour every track)

  • @00au
    @00au 6 років тому +139

    im not suicidal, i dont wanna fuckin die!
    my fav line..

    • @muldanrahmat8832
      @muldanrahmat8832 5 років тому +2

      I'm Suicidal I Want Fuckin Died My Fav Line

    • @ritz2704
      @ritz2704 5 років тому +1

      @@muldanrahmat8832 same

    • @muldanrahmat8832
      @muldanrahmat8832 5 років тому

      @@ritz2704 Sorry To Hear That Man It Be Like That Sometimes

  • @jennadurbin3538
    @jennadurbin3538 5 років тому +99

    "But I'm ditching the coffin, so my family has options. Gotta work till I'm dead, so that they get the best."

    • @SaiTheForgotten
      @SaiTheForgotten 5 років тому +1

      Meirl and probs us irl

    • @Venlysi
      @Venlysi 5 років тому

      no its “put a bitch in a coffin”

  • @iridescencenankurunaisa9473
    @iridescencenankurunaisa9473 3 роки тому +10

    I listened to this song in 2019 it portrayed how I felt and now in 2021 I realize that I still feel that way

  • @michaeldolenak5950
    @michaeldolenak5950 4 роки тому +264

    TL;DR: from one depressed person to another, it finally got better.
    Nobody will probably read this but: it does get better. I am thankful to have survived up to the point of writing this comment. Over 12 years(half my life) of battling severe depression, where 6 of those years I would contemplate thoughts of my death every day, where every night I went to bed begging never to wake up again. Where I never planned for a future because I didnt think i would make it past 23 years of age. Doing whatever to fill the void within myself; drugs, material things, trying to fit in with ANYONE i thought might bring me happiness. It felt like nothing worked and i would daily fight a battle within myself to stay alive, no matter how many times I tried. Its been a really rough last few years especially, but ive gained so much wisdom, and now my life revolves around giving as much support to the Brain Health (mental health) community as i can give back. The world isnt perfect and my life is far from good. But now, adversity in life the end of the world for me. Self destructive behaviors are not my coping mechanisms anymore, in fact im currently figuring out which tattoos I can do to cover up my scars, and trust me, i know what its like. I just hope maybe one person who might read this believes this, because truthfully I know i wouldnt have before. You are loved.

    • @michaeldolenak5950
      @michaeldolenak5950 4 роки тому +3

      @DaddyPool 420 my dude, you have so much life left to live. I was there in that position at 14 too. It fuckin sucks sometimes, and it sometimes just feels like there's no way out, but there is. There's a practice I learned to pick up on that helped me begin the see the better side of things. Every day, at night or when you wake up, think of 3 things you saw that either made your day better or if you see an act of kindness whether its to you or another person. If you do this for 21 days, your brain has an actual physical change. Hang in there, and please, if you ever feel like you're not in a safe place, reach out. There are so many people and support out there. Keep fighting, I sincerely fucking promise you that it get better, and one day you're gonna apoligize to yourself for not knowing your worth.

    • @afd4055
      @afd4055 4 роки тому +2

      Lira mira diyon kardeş noliyo

    • @barkenmeows763
      @barkenmeows763 4 роки тому

      by who..

    • @blacktulip2006
      @blacktulip2006 4 роки тому +1

      But why are you here when it get's better?

    • @michaeldolenak5950
      @michaeldolenak5950 4 роки тому +5

      @@blacktulip2006 because even tho I'm better, I still feel this way from time to time. And thats okay. I recognize the emotions for what they are, and then let them pass. All things pass in life, and emotions are temporary

  • @laynekillsback5262
    @laynekillsback5262 3 роки тому +32

    Living life is the worst pain I'm going thru. Being alive is something i don't wanna do but ofc ppl are forcing me to do something i don't wanna do again

    • @alexdaniel5641
      @alexdaniel5641 3 роки тому +1

      If you need help go talk to your friends, family and people you trust, life can be great so dont waste it, and also dont worry everything is gonna be better after the pandemic ends so just wait, keep going foward because life is full of good experiences and memories that are gonna make you think it was all worth it, a lot of suicide survivors remember that they changed their mind mid-suicide and are glad to be alive, if necessary search for help in the internet, call the suicide hotline and if you can afford a therapist too because i worry about you "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"

  • @raemavl296
    @raemavl296 6 років тому +225

    Happiness has left the chat

    • @NariNon
      @NariNon 6 років тому +5

      Depression has joined the chat.

    • @Inseptex
      @Inseptex 6 років тому +6

      Death has joined the chat

    • @nooraiwa4
      @nooraiwa4 6 років тому

      (edited)

  • @BFGofficial2
    @BFGofficial2 Рік тому +4

    This song is a therapy for all of us.

  • @alice4086
    @alice4086 5 років тому +51

    This song is so catchy. Especially the beginning 🖤

    • @chemicalturtle5677
      @chemicalturtle5677 5 років тому +1

      It's not catchy it's just great lol

    • @hani-1642
      @hani-1642 5 років тому +2

      @@chemicalturtle5677 let people give their opinion in peace..

  • @degre_5261
    @degre_5261 7 років тому +5100

    I bought the album... if anyone has second thoughts... BUY IT

    • @zerowolfblade
      @zerowolfblade 7 років тому +33

      Brayden Degre it's not on Google play store so I can't buy it. Like come on that's garbage

    • @degre_5261
      @degre_5261 7 років тому +23

      Zero Wolfblade that fucking sucks

    • @iamactuallyjakehill
      @iamactuallyjakehill  7 років тому +128

      Zero Wolfblade It will be soon. I set the release date way too early which means it probably won’t hit every store at the exact same time. Give it a few more days

    • @Luis-ym9or
      @Luis-ym9or 7 років тому +6

      Zero Wolfblade spotify

    • @bulten5275
      @bulten5275 7 років тому +6

      Brayden Degre don’t you have apple music? All music there is free.

  • @shaquiquijones2197
    @shaquiquijones2197 3 роки тому +218

    This song hits different at full volume at 2 am

    • @ZIADD
      @ZIADD 3 роки тому +2

      Ikr

    • @Femtanyls_biggest_fan
      @Femtanyls_biggest_fan 3 роки тому +4

      Listening this at 4am rn

    • @LadySasha2115
      @LadySasha2115 3 роки тому +1

      listen to gucci coffin, u might like it

    • @XILEAYY
      @XILEAYY 3 роки тому

      where i am rn

    • @Satyammm247
      @Satyammm247 2 роки тому

      It is 4 :45 in India and I am listening it right now
      It gives me goosebumps

  • @Jibbzz
    @Jibbzz Рік тому +4

    Whoa. Odd how this almost perfectly encapsulated my own struggle. The thoughts are there but the intent isn't, and lots of people I've opened up to don't understand the distinction. Accepting the feelings, moving past them, and fighting every damn day to escape the mire in our minds. Good lyrics and flow.

  • @07JoJoINC
    @07JoJoINC 5 років тому +91

    X and Ski
    Now Jake Hill and Josh A.
    Legendary duos

    • @lozi247
      @lozi247 5 років тому

      no what are you on

  • @lorens1496
    @lorens1496 4 роки тому +22

    Its funny how It hits different depends on situations, for me like being depressed and suicidal for like 8 years, it hits more the more you have enough of fighting every day, so I hope every one of you will have a good life. this song is masterpiece

    • @alexdanieloliveira2294
      @alexdanieloliveira2294 3 роки тому

      If you need help Go talk to your friends,family and People you Trust, Life can Be Great só dont waste it, dont worry after the pandemic ends everything is gonna Be better, a lot of suicide survivors changed their mind mid-suicide and are glad to Be Alive, keep going foward for your family and friends, Life is a adventure full of Good memories and Good experiences, If necessary call the suicide hotline and maybe even a therapist and search for help in the internet like r/suicidewatch "suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem" i worry about you my friend

  • @camillerivas5955
    @camillerivas5955 5 років тому +2372

    I'm not scared of death I've already lived longer than I expected

  • @Dudja
    @Dudja 2 роки тому +1

    Amazing song

  • @tukii6159
    @tukii6159 5 років тому +773

    When Depression and Anxiety kick in the middle of class :)

    • @yeah7174
      @yeah7174 5 років тому +6

      Exactly. :)

    • @nicoteaco4812
      @nicoteaco4812 5 років тому +3

      All the time

    • @kevinharmse8656
      @kevinharmse8656 5 років тому +1

      I hope you're better now

    • @lickras
      @lickras 5 років тому +8

      @@kevinharmse8656 doesn't work like that

    • @nicoteaco4812
      @nicoteaco4812 5 років тому +8

      And then you cant get anything done and then the teacher sends you to the office and it gets worse

  • @reeve6775
    @reeve6775 5 років тому +36

    Every day you feel like dying
    Every day I feel like crying because of the things from the past

  • @jb17415
    @jb17415 7 років тому +305

    Jake, you matter

    • @reallylad9254
      @reallylad9254 7 років тому +39

      SloppyJoe DON'T FORGET ABOUT OUR HOMIE JOSH A, HE MATTERS TOO, REAL SHIT

    • @2girls1frank
      @2girls1frank 6 років тому +1

      LeviWTF lmao fr

    • @Oltys
      @Oltys 6 років тому +1

      フランク what is your name exactly I understand some parts but not all

    • @niklas100ish
      @niklas100ish 6 років тому +1

      it translates into frank

    • @Oltys
      @Oltys 6 років тому +1

      Kazath Shieldbane thanks mate I'm trying to learn the kanji but it's a bit difficult

  • @kalebcoco9066
    @kalebcoco9066 2 роки тому +28

    Ive never been the emo type but this shit actually makes me feel better when im depressed. I even have a fee songs like this that talk about my depression

  • @haldosa8898
    @haldosa8898 6 років тому +212

    You remind of NF
    Your songs have basically the same context, legit lyrics, no mumble, pure rap

    • @user-ee2vn3fg4w
      @user-ee2vn3fg4w 6 років тому +8

      I love both of them, they're amazing.♡

    • @skeletizer
      @skeletizer 6 років тому +1

      True

    • @FoxyyAJ
      @FoxyyAJ 6 років тому

      SaVaGe Fluffy yes!

    • @dylantippery7843
      @dylantippery7843 6 років тому

      NF is great, I stopped listening to him around after How Could you leave us. I haven't heard anything from him in a while

    • @jacobj7343
      @jacobj7343 6 років тому

      Love this song and love nf just waiting for him to release his new album

  • @nohjjgghju7uyh
    @nohjjgghju7uyh 4 роки тому +3161

    Singer *kills them selves*
    Fans "i wish we knew 😭🤧"
    The singers songs

  • @Furnikki
    @Furnikki 4 роки тому +45

    I kept listening to this in my suicidal days hoping someone would notice and help me.
    It didn't work, nobody helped.
    If you have dark or suicidal thoughts, please go seek help.
    Talk to someone you trust.
    if you don't have anyone you trust to talk about it then there is a lot of phone number you can call or do everything to stop yourself from doing the act of killing yourself.
    If you know you can't control yourself anymore and know you will act on your thought, please go to the nearest hospital or police station.
    They will do everything in their power to prevent bad things to happen.
    Mabey nobody tells you this enough but we love you.
    No matter who you are or where you from, we love you.
    If you didn't understand it yet, I love you and please seek help.

  • @Simpson195
    @Simpson195 10 місяців тому +7

    I hate the fact UA-cam has a warning when you play this song but this song is about NOT killing yourself.

  • @ineonfox4787
    @ineonfox4787 3 роки тому +40

    I remember I listened to this song like 2 years ago when I was pretty much depressed (undiagnosed tho, so can't fully claim that)
    It kinda helped me to go through these tough times. I believe you guys also gonna get better!

  • @rileylena9350
    @rileylena9350 5 років тому +137

    I’m not suicidal I don’t wanna F%#$ die just wanna be able to close my eyes and feel alright..
    Dangg that hit hardd

  • @iamactuallyjakehill
    @iamactuallyjakehill  7 років тому +3569

    Me and Josh are on Spotify:
    Jake: open.spotify.com/artist/26JloX1vHxGGrGUVeMItFJ?si=I6ATO_LaTv-nm7ukx2eVjw
    Josh A: open.spotify.com/artist/2rWCIhENZyPVDAeFC0ESWN?si=iNGYk35CSgS7PVDUwYRV4w

    • @slothsyn
      @slothsyn 7 років тому +20

      iAmJakeHill I appreciate the relatable music

    • @koator
      @koator 7 років тому +10

      lyrics plssss

    • @LauraHill10005
      @LauraHill10005 7 років тому

      ;)

    • @aaronnn9941
      @aaronnn9941 7 років тому +4

      Fuck yes

    • @traymuse3810
      @traymuse3810 7 років тому +1

      iAmJakeHill how do I set up a event

  • @reb287
    @reb287 2 роки тому +2

    My comfort song I used to listen this nonstop 2020-2021 and now I'm not sayin that Im free from struggling with my mental health just not as bad as last year. Whoever is struggling with their mental health now I hope one day you will found your lost soul that you've been questioning if you had one.

  • @HelloImPhaze
    @HelloImPhaze 6 років тому +928

    Everyday I feel like dying
    very very true

    • @KingofFray
      @KingofFray 6 років тому +7

      Hang in there

    • @ripvanwinkle6832
      @ripvanwinkle6832 6 років тому +6

      Same here

    • @bobthe7thh
      @bobthe7thh 6 років тому +4

      @@RiqzaR your nice

    • @RiqzaR
      @RiqzaR 6 років тому +1

      @@bobthe7thh I appreciate that brot....

    • @fahalo5688
      @fahalo5688 5 років тому +7

      Dude if you actually feel suicidal please call 1-800-273

  • @kashootmyself9799
    @kashootmyself9799 5 років тому +633

    i like how this is the guy who made an outro for PewDiePie

    • @Venlysi
      @Venlysi 5 років тому +2

      kashoot myself ikr

    • @thecoolkar
      @thecoolkar 5 років тому +15

      kashoot myself for real?

    • @gae1_vb
      @gae1_vb 5 років тому +9

      And tobyonthetele

    • @bryceh2163
      @bryceh2163 5 років тому

      I only like the comment because kashoot is funny

    • @dog_on_chair
      @dog_on_chair 5 років тому +2

      u_don't_ _need_my_name ayy someone else knows lol

  • @avab.2701
    @avab.2701 5 років тому +122

    *I just wanna close my eyes and feel alright*
    This actually hit hard, ever since I moved Ive been hella depressed, and where I live the kids are horrible. I was so mad at myself for being so sad and suicidal. But I dont blame myself anymore, and if I go to anyone they wont believe me :)

    • @bellamitchell6518
      @bellamitchell6518 5 років тому +4

      I understand I try to tell people I'm depressed and they tell me that I'm too nice or happy looking to be depressed. Its annoying

    • @avab.2701
      @avab.2701 5 років тому +3

      BellaDog99 Woof It really is, but things get better 😁🙏 If you believe in god just pray, just really pray.

    • @bellamitchell6518
      @bellamitchell6518 5 років тому

      @@avab.2701 I try

    • @avab.2701
      @avab.2701 5 років тому +2

      BellaDog99 Woof 😇🤗💕🥺

    • @knightjohnson8930
      @knightjohnson8930 5 років тому

      you sound like a ss

  • @YourBasicPatriot
    @YourBasicPatriot 3 роки тому +3

    Man the old depressed days 😞 this song always has a spot In my hart, I was lucky enough to find happyness again unlike others.

  • @contractorhomes
    @contractorhomes 5 років тому +533

    Showed this to my grades...
    They were an F and didnt change

  • @slowlyforward3407
    @slowlyforward3407 5 років тому +1363

    Who also doesn't want to die but is not afraid to

  • @someguyinthecomments370
    @someguyinthecomments370 5 років тому +3327

    Showed this song to my teacher
    Now he's my therapist

    • @Xiroh
      @Xiroh 5 років тому +59

      Some guy in the comments
      Relatable

    • @tuc07770
      @tuc07770 5 років тому +29

      Some guy in the comments that’s a good one lol

    • @leonung9789
      @leonung9789 5 років тому +21

      Some guy in the comments showed this to my girl just now. She probably gonna hug me and cry. Oops. But what can I say it’s a great song that I could relate to

    • @leonung9789
      @leonung9789 5 років тому +3

      Go Lol who u talking to

    • @leonung9789
      @leonung9789 5 років тому +5

      Go Lol he is probably young dude. My 5 year old brother watches stuff like that all the time. Y u gotta pick on him for the stuff he likes?

  • @rayannathomas1
    @rayannathomas1 Рік тому +1

    This song always makes me cry. One of those songs that is overwhelmingly accurate.

  • @kailen4420
    @kailen4420 4 роки тому +30

    Every time I listen to this it makes me cry. This song hits too close to home.

  • @loser7092
    @loser7092 6 років тому +523

    Suicidal is the definition of giving up:
    Like, when something bad happens to you, you don't ever wish "I wish my life was better.." or "I'll do something to fix this."
    Being suicidal is like when something bad happend you say, "That's it. That's all I can take and I'm ready to go."
    No, I have never said to myself "Oh, I wish my life could go better. I don't deserve this.." I just give up and shut down saying, "There's only one way to get out of this."
    I've tricked myself into thinking that nothing goes right for me, and that's it.

    • @energyvanquish
      @energyvanquish 6 років тому +20

      JayJay Sanderson simply being at your breaking point. There’s only so much someone can take and I can relate to what you’re saying more than I wish to admit but I’ve got people who rely on me and I guess you do too even if you don’t notice. So do me a favour and everyone else who also cares and stay strong. There’s always a solution to every situation even if you may not see it. That’s why you need people around you to show you the other options. You got this fam ✌️

    • @clink0123
      @clink0123 6 років тому +8

      I have had thoughts, but I'd rather not commit the action and give myself a purpose. If people are able to give themselves a purpose, you are set

    • @udijj8196
      @udijj8196 6 років тому +1

      the sad truth is your right
      we should all be like this not suicidal

    • @chyaaaaaaaaa
      @chyaaaaaaaaa 6 років тому +1

      neurosis is a bitch.

    • @xlxn7399
      @xlxn7399 6 років тому +5

      I don't know how, but I got rid of my depression. I never spoke to anyone about it, neither someone noticed. It was hella tough, but I made it through. I didn't say anything like 'I'm gonna get through this' and stuff, I was constantly telling myself that I'm a mistake, a loser, a nobody. And now I feel like a normal person, and I am happy and healthy now, which is the most important thing. Stay strong everyone, but DON'T do what I did.

  • @haydendell5914
    @haydendell5914 4 роки тому +41

    Never realize how hard this hit until you’re going through it yourself

    • @noob7751
      @noob7751 4 роки тому

      i never will,im not a moron like these idiots are. You need nothing for hapynis

    • @prashantdhirde9577
      @prashantdhirde9577 4 роки тому

      @@noob7751 what are you talking about

    • @noob7751
      @noob7751 4 роки тому

      @@prashantdhirde9577 the truth

  • @BrailleGamer04
    @BrailleGamer04 2 роки тому +30

    I can relate to this so much, when I was 16, I tried to overdose on pills and it didn't work. Even though I feel depressed every day, 'fuck suicide, I'm here to stay!' Thanks josh a.

    • @LoveYallWithMyLife
      @LoveYallWithMyLife Рік тому +1

      Dude I get it, I tried to OD when I was fucking 13. I discover his music about a week ago and I can't stop playing his music on repeat.

    • @BrailleGamer04
      @BrailleGamer04 Рік тому

      @@LoveYallWithMyLife nice bro!

    • @LoveYallWithMyLife
      @LoveYallWithMyLife Рік тому

      @@BrailleGamer04 Thanks dude, it takes skill to try and od 5 times in one week and then fake being okay in front of everyone.

    • @BrailleGamer04
      @BrailleGamer04 Рік тому

      @@LoveYallWithMyLife I know

    • @BrailleGamer04
      @BrailleGamer04 Рік тому

      @@LoveYallWithMyLife you ODd 5 times?🥲 Never forget that your life is important, I know what it’s like and I struggle with some mental issues it sucks bro. We are both just trying to hang in there.

  • @Fishemi
    @Fishemi 3 роки тому +28

    Leaving this world is not as scary as it sounds.
    - Richard

  • @laydrox443
    @laydrox443 5 років тому +1541

    Don’t ask who’s here in 2020
    We never left !

  • @KTheStruggler
    @KTheStruggler 4 роки тому +57

    There have been times where I've literally just had to tell myself do it tomorrow and just live one day at a time. It gets better. If I could have shown myself now, happily married and a boy onmf my own on the way to 17- 20 year old me it would made those years easier.
    Life will always be a bit of a struggle. Grind through it one day at a fuckin time if you have to. It's hard sometimes but try to find the happiness in anything you can.
    Sometimes I lose. You can't go from putting a literal gun to your head to being happy right off the bat. But don't let that fool you into thinking you can't improve, life is hard, it's always gonna be hard but you matter. I've seen it all too much. It's a disease it really is and I've seen it mess a lot of people up.

    • @blade_player1159
      @blade_player1159 4 роки тому +3

      Thank you i needed this

    • @noob7751
      @noob7751 4 роки тому

      lmao

    • @lincoln5825
      @lincoln5825 2 роки тому

      Thank you, this brought me a better sense on how to deal with it.