Quit Doing These Things At Church! | Steve Harvey
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- Опубліковано 14 лис 2018
- I love my people at Church, but there's some things I wish ya'll stop doing. Watch me list them off at SteveHarvey.com #ThrowbackThursday #TBT #StandUp
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VISIT MY WEBSITE: www.steveharvey.com
FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL:
Instagram: / iamsteveharveytv
Twitter: / iamsteveharvey
Facebook: / steveharvey
READ MY BOOK "JUMP": rstyle.me/+yhR31ZPoND444eRuHq...
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WATCH MORE VIDEOS FROM STEVE HARVEY:
Motivational Videos: • Motivational Videos | ...
Inspirational Brain Drops: • Steve Harvey's Tips Fo...
Rolling With Steve Harvey: • Rolling With Steve Harvey
Throwback Thursday Comedy: • Stand Up Comedy | Stev...
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"That ain't a testimony, that's a store policy" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Going to a store and taking stuff back and you have you're receipt and they give you you're money back they have to do that meaning that is not a testimony a testimony is being free of cancer and some other sickness and you had 6 to 10 weeks to live but now you're cancer free so you can now live a long life now that's a testimony.
😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
If you gotta weak bladder stop sitting in the middle of the row you know you big cutting through the isle knocking people wig off
@@brentjames2576 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm sorry just can't hold in
I'm trying to get someone's attention:Look up the meeting of Cuomo talkin about the vaccine with the BLM, Church leaders & the NAACP, Unbelievable & what a joke that he is using the black churches... you ALL BETTER WAKE-UP! YOU ARE BELIEVING THE Great DECEPTION AND DELUSION that the BIBLE talks about. HOW FITTING THAT Cuomo would use & miss Lead all these Leaders into the LIONS DEN giving them recognition now when he's never given them front stage for anything just bcuz they want to vaccinate them bcuz they know that the Latin in Black communities are NOT up on what the vaccination truly is & how it's going to affect them & Basically leading them to slaughter. They have no clue bcuz they listen to the regular News. THEY WANT TO ZAP all the poor unsuspecting people with this vaccine worldwide for profit. The 2nd ones in line are the old retirees in rest homes, this is elderly abuse to the grosses level's. They REALLY don't know what's going on & they trust the people who are caring for them. The government want to get ride of them bcuz monthly the government is having to pay them their retirement & this is the biggest transfer of wealthy the US government has to pay out on a monthly basis & they want to do away with them all.
The 3rd in line are the healthcare workers & police.
There are way more people in the U.S.today & they were taking care of the streets when I was a child & we pay way more taxes then? And why can't they maintain & painting the streets with reflective paint, reflectors & light on the streets for better visibility, filling the potholes in the street like they use to and cleaning our streets. Some of the best neighborhoods have more potholes than the cities of Watts. Why because the government is emptying out our money and putting it their pockets & it's been going on forever, it's just now that WE the people are all too busy Riddle with the cost of living by design & we can't pay attention & fight the powers-that-be bcuz we'll lose everything we've worked hard for, meanwhile they pillage our tax dollars to pay themselves. All these investigations for this or that, is another Payday for them. They distribut the money amongst themselves. They create new scandals & just waste our money, meanwhile the homeless die in the streets. The US gets these people on these drugs to help them control the population, once they have them doped out and lock up the other's in prison, giving the maximum time for a crime of drugs when they should be in a drug diversion program and be giving a skill so that they can be assets to society. Then they keep everyone watching the Boop tube creating scandals... anything they can to keep people occupied. Then there's SOCIAL MEDIA and everyone's in this trans stage and controlled...then they can do what they want with our tax dollars and everyone just doesn't complain and it's done RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSES. Watch the movie "All the money in the world" that the mentally of who's running our country and the world.
We need to understand that just like the vaccines are harming our children with giving them harmful vaccines, now we ALL are a Target for profit.
Do you not see the Autism in the US and now Africa where good old Bill Gates foundation in such a nice guy helping them and they too have noticed the Autism where as was not seen before Bills so called helping these 3rd world countries with VACCINES. Gee thanks Bill Gates. The vaccines are hurting us and we can prove it if we just get our heads back on our shoulders and think.
These doctor's see the Autism cases after the vaccines but the by design have raised the tuition for everything including the Doctorate degrees, they've got these doctor's like a fish in a hook in debt so they can't squeal. They have hospital that slowly pay these doctor's tuitions so they really feel indebted to these hospitals therefore they cannot speak out. These drs see what's going on but are in so much dept they have them by the neck. Why do you think the suicide rate has skyrocketed lately. Drs see what they are doing to the people. So, Y'ALL BETTER WISE UP.
Look on UA-cam for: the meeting 201, look at Bill Gates eugenics project, agenda 21& 2030. Look on Netflix for the Utopia project (something like that) they are fooling the general population with paying miniscule wages, offering fewer jobs bcuz of these computers being installed and yet they have mad more $ &become filthy rich & they still want more. Meanwhile they are taking us all to the lion's den in one form or another. I'm a cap driver and parent's tell me they are getting their children on Ritalin from the young age of 1 &2 years old & a parent told me that she gets Welfare & Welfare pays her more money each month to keep her kid on Ritalin 😳.
So if you think that the government who allows so much junk in our foods & by products, chemicals on our fruits veggies, water and air with these geoengineer clouds to cool the EARTH!!!! REALLY!!? That's a total scam, these chemicals they mix in these man made clouds are stuff that gives us absolutely everything we are suffering from.
This vaccine has (a scannable die called Luciferase that will be scannable under the skin. Also the cv19 shot is not a vaccine (another deceit). It's an RNA/DNA mutating carcinogenic shot which they are calling a "VACCINE". You can't make a vaccine or test for covid-19 bcuz it's a man-made substance. This will separate the woke from the un-woke... like the 10 virgins and will kill off the a lot of the population and dumb down the rest of us.. Do you all understand that Donald Trump was trying to tell America & the whole world about hydroxychloroquine & nobody wanted to listen to him. He also stopped them from closing down the milk & meat production, stating that the worker's had Covid-19 & that the food was contaminated. These fools were gonna try and starve us out!!& Trump didn't let them. Look he is far from perfect but he wasn't going to let them kill us off like they wanted to.
Look up on UTUBE or other venues the below info; Dr. John Bergman. The Highwire.com with Del Bigtree. The Corbett Report On UA-cam. Then look up Killing cancer by the show "Vice" they get rid of a man's stage 4 brain cancer in about 7 weeks with stem cell therapy, so why are we still using chemo when they have stem cell and immunotherapy for cancer & stem cell for the cure of heart disease (Look up)"heart disease & stem cell therapy) Look up: Peggy Hall-The Healthy American, she tells us what we can do to open up our Churches, business for free you can download the documents & serve the ppl we need to. If we dont we will lose everything according to their plan.
The only way to fight these crooks is with the proof of the SCIENCE and take these crooks who want to vaccinate to court for Genocide, vaccinating the masses, senior abuse, Mass corruption for profit (Hitler move, Id say) and do it with the below Dr. Scott Jensen, Dr. Richard Bartlett MD from Texas, Dr. Buttar, Dr.Shiva, Dr.NeputeDr Simone Gold MD & all the American Frontline doctor's and last but not least the ppl who publish the "Autism magazine" & we can beat them in court &put them behind bars.
These videos tell the truth & have nothing at stake, so they tell the truth with citing documents & materials, terms of covid-19... follow the money. Screenshot all this bcuz it will be taken down.
There are other ways to treat covid-19 & help folks who are dying but they are not giving them the correct meds bcuz they want the high death tolls so they can do worldwide vaccinations for profit & genocide the old folks so they won't be paying out retirements... I want enough church pastors to see this so they can understand what's going on & warn the ppl. This is the Mark of the BEAST bcuz we won't be able to buy or sell without it.
Boost your immune system with super greens powders from walmart.com it's only $14.97 take a good source of vitamin C 1,000mg, D3 10,000iu and zinc EVERYDAY. I work the airport and I've been exposed many many times & when I couldn't breath I took 5 to 8 low dose (81mg of Aspirin) & I could breath within 15 mins regularly, I also took a higher dose of vitamin C intake for 3 or 4 days or (1,000am, 1,000 at noon &1,000 at bedtime for 3 or 4 days or so (be careful if you have bad kidney function) .
Disclosure: I am not a doctor. You must check with your doctor before taking anything. This is not FDA approved and I am not trying to cure anyone from anything.
That thing about the weak bladder is so true!!!
Ya know I have to learn to go before I watch one of these.
Same thing on the airplane!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
They always sit in the middle of the pew, and they take diuretics and have a big glass of water and 3 cups of coffee before church begins.
Laughter is a medicine for the soul..... I going to do more of it.
Laughter is good for the soul. Thanks Steve. 😊
I hope you do too
This guy sounds like Ronald Isley!
Says who? It is written, “better is the house of mourning than the house of laughter”.
@2:37 "That ain't a testimony! That's a STOW POLICY!" That one makes my tummy hurt LOL!!
Heh Hehehe 😜 "STOW" "POLICY"
This man is crazy. That testimony part got me 🤣
Yeah, I really felt that one!
There is a part two to the things to not do in church.
His fro was everything🥰
Perfection!
It's perfect
Clean asf
butterfly9274 SHARP
Well it was fake...
"You know you wide, cuttin through the isle, knockin everybody hat off, you wipin women's lipstick off" 😂😂😂
6:06 "this ain't no MEAL!" Got my feet kicking.
Not only he is Steve harvey funny .But he's telling the truth about people and what they do during church service.
Yep!! Ive experienced it!
Donald Pharisee true💖
All these things seem to happen at every church I have been to- Mormon, protestant, etc. What else happens is the ushers have a track record of fainting cause they stand with their knees locked.
My other dislike is people who try to give sermons during their prayers.
That's why it's funny.
He is truly a national icon, that we all need ro appreciate while he is still with us
Absolutely. With Steve, let's not wait until it's too late. RIP Louie Anderson.
Yes
I love Steve Harvey----he tells it like it is, no sugar coating going on here.
So no one is going to talk about how smooth and clean Steve Harvey's hair is
ha,ha
Wig
Nope cause everyone and their mother talks about it all the time.
You mean was lol
He's really made of plastic.
Lol.......He is so right, them kids in Children's Church are terrible!!!!!🤣😂
Because we can't discipline them now. When I was that age my church h as d a Bush that was perpetually short on limbs because parents pulled them off for switches. Spare the rod and spoil the child
One lesson they'll teach in Sunday school is about HELL as soon as the teacher teach them about HELL and an enturnity of being in a pit of fire those brats will turn into good little angels in the future.
@@MrMike384 you can discipline kids without physically assaulting them 😒
@@MrMike384 stop it get some help
Preach brotha!
"That ain't a testimony, that's a store policy!"
That ain't a testimony, that's a store policy 😂😂😂😂😂😂
If you gotta a weak bladder....AMEN STEVE AMEN
"It ain't a baby bible school any more; it's a juvenile detention center." Yep--kind of like teaching in public school.
Yep 😊😊
One MercilessMing heh lucky me
Yea cuz its easy and u really do nothin
@Alien Doge cool
Amen. I second that
“Daddy, why she got holes in her legs??” Prepare the casket. I’m DEAD😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣 comedy gold!
Off topic but you're pretty!
Gasp Tornado Why, thank you, kindly! 🙏🏾☺️
Damn you are gorgeous girl
Tony Acosta Thank you🙏🏾☺️.
Steve's fro is impeccable here. it looks smooth to the touch.
“This ain’t no meal, this is a holy ritual!” 😂
Nick Gee 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 That part cracked me up!
that was my favorite!
We just wait in line for ours.
They laughed but it's true! Communion is a holy, sacred ritual honoring what Jesus Christ did for us!
I have never in my long life ever heard the truth being layed bare as that You are to be admired and appreciated
Yep a lot of church people can get upset all they want but hey,the truth will set you free!!
No Way that stuff really happens in church. But ig was funny 🤣😂🤣😂😂🤣
@@patienceboyce4505 you never go to church yourself.
He's calling out everyone 😇😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I am proud being alive because I have had a privilege to watch legends like Him, Steve Harvey.
The Pastors' kids are the worst.
im proud dead, watch good legned
@@pettytoni1955 I can vouch for that! I dated one and he was also a youth pastor at the church his daddy was pastor and let me tell ya, well actually just let me put it this way……he tried doing things with me that would probably land your butt in hell or at least jail (same diff right 😂). I told him no sir, not today Satan. 😂
Who's still watching this in 2022 if you are you are a true fan god bless
2024 here
Classic stand up, never gets old.
Im sorry for your name
5:01
The way he says “in the crack of yo butt” is hysterical.
I've never seen an Afro so perfect
That shit the was fake. Man unit
That ain't a testimony that's a a store policy 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Making change out of the collection plate.
Shenice Says i love him dorïs
That's like God giving you a blessing or an answered prayer but taking back some of it then shrugging His shoulders. people that do that should be ashamed of themselves.
Steel Driver Nope
funny but its an old joke. But as they say' its how you tell it !'
Passing the collection plate around about 4 or 5 times during service.
He said, "this ain't no meal". 🤣🤣🤣
Classic Steve, son. He was droppin' that Pure, 100%, unadulterated Fire. Too relatable.
Best pick up line at church...”Hey...I been praying for you...”
Oh Lawwd!! Not bad lol
Girl then they want to give out a dang 10 min hug. Bro man release me in Jesus name lol
Ya nina that's the golden sentence , for years together nothing happens when prayed that's my experience christianity is bullshit
But Guuurrrl, you know I’ve been praying for you! 😂
That Happend to me, i didnt realize...
yo his hair clean asf
I_Do_Things_Sometimes always was
Just like that microphone 🎤 👈😂
its a lace wig.....got us all
@@highlightedreply8838 EXACTLY ( MAN) WEAVE BACK THEN UNTIL THEY WERE ABOUT TO ( OUT) HIM LMAO THEN HE WENT BALD 😂😂😂
He looks like the mic he’s holding
….Matching....
Lol lol😭😭😭twinning lol
I dont know how he got it so uniform and precise
HHAHAHAHAHA! AMAZING!!
Stefan Sharak 😂😂
This needs to be played at every watch night service
Steve Harvey is so funny. He tells it like it is and we all laugh about it. I am sure people do these things all the time and people wish they would stop. God bless y'all.
Like him or hate him, Steve was funny af here!
Here’s a good one, if your 3-year-old won’t stop wailing and crying while the pastor is delivering the sermon, take your kid outside and try to calm him down. DON’T SIT THERE AND JUST LET HIM CRY ALL THROUGHOUT THE SERVICE. Just because you’re desensitized to their banshee-loud voices doesn’t mean the rest of us are.
Lol
Preach brother preach !
Bro I was at church recently and this 3 year old girl would not stop crying for 20 minutes! I was starting to get annoyed eventually the dad took her in another room this is the one thing they makes me annoyed at church 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Not to mention the disrespect it shows on your part to all others listening and the WORD.
Thank you!!!!!
1:21 “Just because it’s the testimonial portion of service, don’t necessarily mean you gots to talk! Try to wait on something meaningful or miraculous to happen in your life before you jump up to testify.” Well-stated and true, Steve Harvey. It’s like some false Christians don’t understand the point of testifying.
Here's the testimonials I like, ,,, the devil's been on my back this week, bless his holy name,,,,,,,is she blessing the devil's name?🤣.
Or the lady that gets up to ask for prayer for a friend and proceeds to gossip and spill the whole story, all in the name of prayer for another
This is the best way to start a Monday morning, watching one of Steve Harvey's videos. Hysterical!
Heres something for pastors.
When you say im going to close...CLOSE
Dont say i aint gonna keep you long and then keep us long
Dont read a passage if scripture and then preach a sermon tha is no qhere in the neighborhood whay yiu just read
Because you have something better to do? If you don't want to be at church than don't go.
PREACH!!!!!!!!!! BROTHER
You'd go nuts at Eastern Orthodox liturgy then. During the post-Eucharistic prayers, the priest says "Let us go forth in peace", and there's still 5-10 minutes left (longer if the specific priest in question does the sermon at the end of liturgy rather than after the gospel reading)
Bro, YES!!
That tells me that pastor or preacher ain't focused or basing it off of the text.
That dont mean you gotta tawk!
Here I was minding my own business looking at videos. I see one from Steve Harvey. Well of course I clicked on it; he's always good for a laugh. Well I'm dead. I hope you're happy, Steve. I just hope you're happy.
5:11 "Daddy? Daddy, how come she got holes in her legs?" That part kills me!
My sides are aching from laughing so hard. Steve is the best!!!
It’s a juvenile detention center....lol
Lol, Jodi, you're an American hero, I tell you what.
How are you doing Jodi?
Stop Setting in The Middle of The Row knowing U Got To Go To Bathroom A lot🤣🤣🤣Sat Your Bigg Rump On The End😂😂
Damn he is so articulate and has perfect delivery
I know a lady just like that! She got up in church and said that she got in a wreck and the lord blessed her with a new car. What the hell you think you pay insurance for?🤦♂️
Jay A 😂😅😅😅😆😆😆😆😂
😂😂😂😂😂
Joshua Munn 💀😂🤣🤣🤣😭😭
One lady said she fell down two flights of stairs, but god saved her and blessed her because she didn’t fall down the third and final one 😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I love Steve Harvey. Thanks for making us laugh. You should become an Ambassador for world peace. You, my friend, bring people together.
"That ain't a testimony. That's the store policy!"
Can I get an AMEN?!
😂😂😂😂
Amen
I’m so glad folks don’t talk no more when the pastor offers testimony service . folks be scared 😂
Steve is on Point!! Preach Steve! God got You Steve! Lol! Somebody had to SAY It!😂🙏👼
Sure and this is coming from a person that thinks there more than one way to Heaven.
I can't stood laughing really made my evening. Yes I agree we have so much we should stop in church. Watching from Kenya.
I was raised LDS and I can totally relate to this, especially the "testifying" part. Except, LDS have it only once a month, and it's called, "Fast and Testimony Meeting."
Some people just go full on with a storymony. If people want to go on for 10 to 15 minutes, then they might as well be assigned to give a talk.
Steve was the first that said "Ain't nobody got time for that"!!!!
My mom used to be in the choir irl
She just put the gown over her clothes that way when she was through, she’s ready to drive off🤣
6:21 Steve wylin' out here...
It is such a blessing when you are able to make someone laugh - God Bless Steve Harvey 😊
Steve Harvey needs alot of prayer. He should read his Bible more and maybe think before he speaks more. I'm not referring to this video clip because I haven't heard it. As a Christian the word hell is a very serious place. Steve uses it like it's nothing as he's on TV. The devil doesn't want people to belive hell is real in the first place. So the devil gets off when a professing Christian throws it out there like hell is nothing. He desensitized the word and waters it down. Come on Steve wake up quit doing Satan service that way.
I have watched this about 40 times!! I love it so much. I laugh outloud every time!!
Here's something i wish parents in my church would not do...CHANGE THEIR BABY'S DIAPER IN THE PEW! We don't have a nursery, but we DO have bathrooms. THAT'S WHAT THE BATHROOM IS FOR!
John w Ewwww, like Really? They actually change their baby diaper on the pew where everybody can clearly see you doing that? Plzzzzzzz tell me you’re lying?🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️
@@carmenbennett3686 i've seen it. I mean don't get me wrong, it's not that i think a 2 or 3 month old baby should have a sense of shame that young, but the smell, and the obvious distraction...
That’s what I’m talking about the smell permeating alllllll over the Church, Lawwwwd😂😂😂😩😩😤
That's why they call it the Pew..hahaha
@@johnhsconiers3308 haaaaa haaaaa! Looks like somebody wants to take Steve Harvey's place as the king of comedy! :-D
I can't agree more with him. He's right on point.
3:41
Steve: Something for the pastors.
Random Pleb: aHaHaHAAA!
Loved me some "Payless Shoes" back in da days! Lol! 👞 👟 🩰 👠
😭😂😭😂 I tried watching this while eating and now I got hiccups
The guy at 4:09 be looking like he came out of jail and went straight to the show.
Lol, I know that guy. He didn't come from prison, he's just an African brother. He's an American hero.
☠☠☠🤣🤣🤣
Steve Harvey is the absolute, hands down, funniest person to ever walk this earth. His intelligence and perception on top of the fact he can make any dang thing hilarious is just astounding. Love him!!
Family feud to everyday m thru f I watch him
He's great....now I know you know what yer talking about mr. Harvey,!!!! been in church for 40 years and he is spot on....Always liked seeing him and his wacky take on things, but I didn't know he has a church background....good comment, Brie!
Hey! Steve looks like Richard Pryor even got the voice and the act. Wow!
Barber: How smooth you want your hair?
Steve: Yes.
His hair looks amazing in that light!
I like looking back at Steve Harvey' old stand up comedy and watching how funny he was.
And still is! He's also hilarious on his new court show Judge Harvey.
Steve Harvey was and still is the funniest comedian up-to-date 🤣
Hands down😂😂😂
To MY mind, James Gregory came first, and Steve comes second.
I CANT STOP CRYING AND LAUGHING
Classic Church stuff!! lol
First time seeing Steve Harvey, so glad I came across his site haven't laughed so much for age's, he certainly has a good grasp on life situations.....bravo
Stop expecting the pastor to come and visit you in hospital 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
This ain't no meal. This is a holy ritual
You gone go to hell 🤣🤣🤣
So happy to see him doing so well!
He spoke truth about communion. Im so happy they made the communion bread and juice sets.
Them "ya know" testimonies tho. Got a lot at my church...."saints, ya know, yestadayyy
Thats when i go ...ok.
You know you wide😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Love Steve Harvey, and he is a blessing and always funny!!
Everything he said I've experienced it at my church growing up!! So funny but very true!!
When Steve said that ain't an testimony that a store policy got me laughing so hard oh my god this man is hilarious I needed that laugh thank you😂😄😅
Mr Steve Harvey is too funny for words.
Lord I went to Payless bought some shoes took them back with my receipt they gave me all my money back LMFAO
U know u wide 😭😂
I love Steve Harvey! He's always been hilarious!!! ❤️
Hello beautiful
Lol! Another classic from the big guy!
I can’t even relate to this but it’s just too funny! His delivery is sublime!
I never knew what a brilliant comedian Steve Harvey is until these last 24 hours!!
Love this. He is cracking me up!
Hello Kathryn
One of the coolest men I know in this world. Steeve God bless you for making me laugh all the time I watch you. you are so nice.soyez richement béni
😂😂😂😂 when Stevie said about the query took me out
WHOOOO did Steve's hair?? No, like really... cause I am behooved of how PERFECT it is. Absolutely perfectly fabulous.
I think you hit the nail on the head Mr Harvey. Hilarious!
Love Steve Harvey and folks he’s originally a West Virginian and the whole State is so proud of him!!! I worked for the best man you ever met Dewey Rutledge from Danville Virginia and he reminded me so much of Mr. Harvey and could nearly tell a good yarn, what a great man he was!
Did you notice his hair best hair style I have every seen
Bravo Steve for keeping it clean and funny! 😂😂
How are you doing?
This had me dying🤣🤣
Milton Tennessee GOD 😎 🌷👸📖🙏(😭)