What NOT To Do When Decluttering or Downsizing
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- Опубліковано 31 тра 2018
- Original tips on what NOT to do (and what to do instead) when decluttering. Hear Laura's perspective on how to think, get ready, pace yourself, and respect your unique needs. All help make it possible to declutter or downsize with ease, even enjoyment.
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Thank you for this short version that helps me to remember why I was so inspired by your full hourlong videos in the first place. It quickly helps me to get “back into gear” in remembering how to work kindly, patiently and intelligently with my clutter issues, which have gotten worse during this year of self-quarantine. My dear husband and I chose to do so because of our advanced ages and health issues, but it’s been emotionally draining, as has it has also been for many others. You are truly a godsend in helping me to understand why my previously small, easily-handled clutter has become a big, overwhelming, self-blaming, emotional monster. Again, thank you for providing this short summarization, which has become part of my planning day for the scheduling of 2-hours of satisfying progress each week! 💐
Thank you! (even 3 years later) it helped me today. I’ve been feeling impatient, now I can be more compassionate, and allow the time necessary.
The worst time to do this is at the last minutes or days prior to a move or major life change ... it’s inevitable and by procrastinating we end up “forcing” ourselves into the added trauma trap of stress with making rash decisions.
It’s best to do as she says in small frequent visits to the tasks in small doses.
I've gone into a freeze mode because I'm now working with the sentimental items to decide upon. Seasonal items, photographs, and China from my mom are among the most difficult for me to make a firm decision on. It causes my stress level to go up because I don't want to regret any of my choices.
Perhaps if you could find specific people to gift these to -- tell them the story of how special they are - and pass them on to someone just starting out --- ? good luck - I struggle too :)
Madonna, slow down think it through...Keep, let go, don't know, yet. Focus on what you can do, and persevere with patience! Take care and thanks for subscribing ... Laura
I took some photos of my sons early writing books and work from school, and some photos of photos and sent them to him.
Doing a major decluttering because we are downsizing. What helped me was decluttering an area then go back and declutter the same area again then again.
Yes, repetition and frequency really help. Sort stuff from an area into categories, and then go back to one category at a time. Enjoy, Laura PS. Thanks for subscribing!
@@ClutterClarity oh my goodness thank you! I I thought that I had to start from zero and go to a hundred and now I realize that it would be okay to buy a cheap set of bins to categorize then go back in again more than once. Thank you for the license to do what I struggled with. Now I feel like I could start
Thank you so much Carolyn that is such what I needed to hear. I've been tossing that around in my head lately because it's overwhelming to get it all done. If you do it I can do it. Makes sense. What was holding me back was I didn't want to go in and buy some bins unless they were the final bins. The heck with with that. This is important. More so than the cost of a few bins that I could actually just donate. Who am I kidding? I'll probably throw them away I'm terrible. But I've got to get this under control. Thank you so much
Hi Carolyn, that's great. Repetition and frequency is very important, doing it in little bits through time, taking breaks. Pacing yourself. Decluttering is just part of life, through time as our lives change to bring our homes and lives back into balance. Please feel free to subscribe! Enjoy, Laura
That's the way I am handling my downsizing.
Amazing.......she describes my relationship with clothing and clutter. She's a kindred spirit.
A lot of younger people are saying It's just stuff, get rid of it. Well, I am Gen X, my parents are Boomers, and they have health and mobility issues that keep them from tackling big clean out projects. True, it's stuff, but I have helped them declutter--they don't have a problem letting go, they just need help hauling it out of the house! 😀
That's true! We all need young people with muscles (and a truck :-)) to get through the physical work. Good for you for helping. Decluttering is a multi-generational work - a family affair. Enjoy, and thanks for subscribing! Grateful, Laura
Amen little lady... That's all I need! Just some help, amen again...just some help. And when I tell them this, the kids say "Well. We know you momma, and it's more than just carting it off. You gotta talk about every little thing. We don't have time for that." ok. You don't have time to find another free babysitter either so I ALWAYS help you out with that. Hum. Now I'm the unloving grandmother. No, just can't clean house running after ya'lls kids all week!!
@@ClutterClarity What do you do when there are no muscles around except your overworked 65 year old partner, and myself with a serious back injury, sorting slowly each day and piling stuff ready to go? I have to make my home easier to live in and clean. Lockdown has made it so hard! BTW I'm in the UK and have found your talks tremendously helpful
@@velvettripp Looks like you didn't get a response,
There are organisations that will come and collect things like clothes, shoes, furniture. You have to contact them and arrange a pick up date and time, maybe either you or a friend/neighbour can help find and give you the details or even arrange the pickup for you. The rubbish you can put in manageable bags and have it collected with your usual collection.
A friend of mine who doesn't have a car and of course family couldn't visit has successfully donated or disposed of bags and bags of things she doesn't want to use. It is just taking longer than usual. Hope you're able to do the same
So true!
You make it sound so simple. I really appreciate the emotional aspect.
I listen to your videos more than once. They always calm me down. It took me 45 minutes to go through a small plastic basket of stuff the other day. I threw out about half of the things in it. Well...it was a start! LOL I'll keep puttering LOL
That's Great! You're doing a little at a time. You have to start somewhere and you started. I did the same thing when I started decluttering. I decided to just do a little at a time and be happy with myself and the accomplishment. I decided to move my kitchen table to a different location but still have a few boxes to go through. my goal was the kitchen table which I did.I'll go through the boxes another day. My living room is almost done. it's baby steps and being happy with what you did. Keep up the great work!.
That's great! It takes as long as it takes. Instead of a goal of time, make a goal of enjoying the work. Show up and be present to your stuff, deciding along the way, what's best for you. Good luck, and thanks or subscribing! Grateful, Laura
Esmereldan: Oh, how I understand that!
I go thru one room at a time. I only do what I feel like for as long as I feel like. I actually declutter 3 or 4 times a year. Everything is organized but I do it this number of times because I find that some things I kept in previous declutter make their way to the "to charity store" box with each new clean out. I have a very large suitcase in one closet where I store seasonal clothing, from dresser drawers. (winter to summer). I am in the process of letting go of xmas decorations ans stuff as I havent put up a tree for years and do not like more than a few knick knacks about the place even at xmas. I also go by the "one in - two out" rule. If i buy one thing two must go to charity. It actually saves me money and makes me really question if I really need vs want an item in the store.
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I like to sort and organize, but don't tell most people because they get really mad and call me a liar. I found long ago it relaxed and entertained me. I found out all you are teaching and it has worked for me for years. I do this sometimes all day or until I'm worn out (happily worn out).I love setting the scene decorating.
wow. You are so aptly named.... you have put so much clarity, on clutter. I will be watching many more of your videos. So wonderful. Thankyou so much!!
Love all you post. Your teachings has changed my life. Spiritually too. Thank you.
Thank you for your lovely response, and kind words! Love to know what teachings have made such a difference to your life. Please stay connected (via email, ClutterClarity website) Thanks for subscribing, more videos and online courses coming ASAP. Stay well! Take good care! Laura
I like the way you talk about a gentle approach, I feel like when I force myself to do something I just revolt and stall and do something else less pressuring
You helped me a lot. I started decluttering really simple.. and I follow you advice. :)
These are all great tips and ring very true for me! I have been decluttering for 3 years now, since I first moved out of my parent's house and realized I didn't need all the boxes and boxes of stuff that I had. It is definitely a process. I find that I reach a point I'm proud of, and within 6 months I'm dissatisfied again and wondering why I'm still holding on to certain things. Embrace the journey. (:
Yes - that's it exactly. Decluttering becomes a way of life, which is a good thing.
So glad my videos are helping. Try to notice without the judgement, no need for dissatisfaction. Enjoy your progress, and keep on coming back. Reflect and practice. This can easily get disorganized in 6 months, or in 6 months you may have a fresh new perspective on a certain item. You don't need to make it wrong to make it better. Good luck! And thanks for subscribing, if you like! Laura
Of course, in 6 months disorder returns because life is in constant motion. No need for disappointment. Notice without the judgement. Stay with the discussion. It's ok to hold onto things. Just make sure that the think you're holding onto holds value to your present life. Its time to reflect. This is a life long endeavor. Take care, Laura Thanks for subscribing!
I agree with this lady. Take one bite at a time. I just did my closet today. Now I will take a break. Will start tomorrow on another part of the room.
2 hours is workable for me. That is not overwhelming. Thank you.
I love your outfit, simple but great with the green. Love it!!!
Decluttering? Really?
No actually having lived through two sets of parents estates, too much of which is in my house, start at 60. Do I need this? Do I wear this? Will I ever roast a big turkey in an electronic toaster this size again? Attacking the basement is a good winter project.
(And, the local food kitchen was really happy with that roaster.)
"...if you can't, just get it close to the door." I think that's brilliant!! I'll be using that one!!
This was great. I needed to hear this. Very insightful.
best decluttering video! Thank you. U feel so much better.
I had no idea I was a pack rat! Now I know it’s going to change everything! Thank you. My new gentle puttering is starting before my next downsize planned in 3 years time.
Thank you Laura you teach me too much , I hope i can be like you in my future thank you again from all of my heart ❤️
I just moved into a beautiful new apartment. I have found that moving always helps me to see the things I have. If I can't see it, I can't be sure if this thing is one from a set that is buried or if the one that is buried is better quality or not. So I keep it.
I need space to spread things out and lots of time. Luckily I'll have weeks or months to do this.
"Decluttering at the Speed of Life" by Dana K. White is an excellent book on this subject. She boils it down to very simple steps, and she's funny too! I listened to it on audible, and it was really helpful.
Appreciated, cheers🙂
Yes, Dana and Dawn from Minimal Mom helped me get started. It's been 6 months since I started and it's been good. Now I'm ready to do more.
Thank you for posting
Thank you,Permission to to take time to figure it out,not guilty for procrastinating.Some very valid points for older folks,I can get it close to the door,even if I can't haul it off myself.❤
Hi Wanda, Steadily show up is essential, and know , young or old, we're not meant to do this work alone. We all need help. Young men/women with muscles and a truck are always good to arrange. Procrastination... build a team of support. Easier to show up. Good luck, Thanks for subscribing! Laura
I have the 10 items rule! In one area, I decide what I have to do with item # 1, # 2 etc and I do the actions. And without realizing it, I do another 10 items. But it is a constant battle!
Good info.. thank you.
Amazing advice xx
'Rethink, Reduce, Reuse, Recycle !' Rethink : before you buy - and therefor reduce.. Reuse or repurpose :find a creative way to create value with your stuff. Recycle : charity box, give away, sell (+ use the money for needed improvements) and recycle - metal, polystyrene, paper etc. And above all - enjoy the process !
Funny I stumbled upon this in my feed... I am once again trying to 'declutter'...
A friend's sister once said when you have 'stuff' you become a slave to it...I have found this to be so very true. It has motivated me to get rid of stuff (clutter) over time.
I have a hard time in doing so, but breaking the process down to manageable 'bites' helps to relieve anxiety... also helpful is asking yourself if this item 'serves' you in purpose any longer...
The putting your clothes away was such a relief!!!!!! That’s totally me!
Great video
Oh yeah on the past I got rid of a lot of stuff to Goodwill so glad of that
is funny you mention about stuff from the mother that you don't like, but for me, it was an attempt to find a connection to have something that I could bond with, something that could tell me that it wasn't so bad.
Take a picture of the item and PASS IT ON
We just redid our master bedroom after 20 years. Ripped out the carpet made a dump run and went to goodwill 3 times. It has been a two week process. Got our laminated floors today and set up new memory foam mattress. Going to be selective of what goes back in my room. Not easy at 61. Our office has been the catch all room more Goodwill runs to do.
Sometimes we have to force ourselves... like when we're moving and don't want to take it all with us.
Sure, but it helps to first accept that you decided to move, you decide to prepare for a move. With acceptance, there's less force, and more willingness to do what it takes to move. Your choosing to do this. Get behind your choice, and you'll find that forcing yourself isn't necessary. Get ready properly is owning your decisions, owning the consequences, and showing up being present to creating change. It makes the work so much easier when you don't have to force yourself. Good luck with your move. Happy home to you. Thanks for subscribing! Laura
Great ideas really helpful
I used to pretend I was getting paid to clean another’s house. Then later after going out I would pretend I someone else had cleaned mine. That cheered me up.
I know what I want to do. I know it really needs to get done. How do you get yourself inspired enough to actually get up and do. I am not trying to go minimalist but I do have a lot of "junk" I want to get rid of. Stuff I don't want but have been keeping for a very long time. Much like the "junk" I carry in my mind that I need to go through and get rid of.
A lot of people know what to do, but this is emotionally messy work. There is a sequence of steps too, but more importantly, you're unique situation and perspective needs to be addressed. You need a fresh perspective and a routine. Identify and attach yourself to your higher purpose to stay motivated. If you really want to get free of the stress, keep on learning. Don't give up. You may want to attend my October webinars - not yet announced - to reduce your frustration, and get on with the decluttering more easily. Don't give up! Laura
Trick yourself. "I'm going to just do this one corner" it usually gets me started then before I know it the whole junk room is cleared out, reorganized and no longer an embarrassment.
Thank you for all the great help and ideas! I also found, because I'm sort of "greedy", that selling stuff (like on eBay) is a terrific way to get rid of clutter. I think you mention this in one of your other videos actually.
I made about $10,000 on eBay in about 3 or 4 years by selling this "stuff", and for me it was kind of fun and fulfilling. Just have to learn NOT to use the money to buy more stuff. ;>)
That's not greedy. That's smart. If you have the skills, have fun with it, and turn your clutter into cash! Feel free to subscribe, I'll be posting a new video every Friday through the summer - Enjoy!
Impressive! Selling is a wonderful idea if you have the skills and time. Can be rewarding, as you definitely illustrate. Persevere and enjoy!
This is what I’m going to do with as much of my stuff as possible. My children are now young adults, and I no longer need to keep a maintaining a big house that continues to be a clutter magnet for everyone’s junk, including mine. I want the extra money from selling everything to help fund some road-trip exploring adventures. These videos are helping me with the emotional roadblocks that have kept me from getting started and accomplishing my goals. Thank you so much!
I always find that when I throw something away I am certain I will need it. Recent example: I bought a 6-cube organizer. The finishing touches required little plastic covers for the tops of the screws. Well, since I finished the project the left over pieces were no longer necessary so I threw them away. The very next day I found a screw sticking out of the inside of my kitchen cabinet handle and it damaged the frame of my cabinet. What to do? I remembered I had thrown them away and the garbage truck picked them up yesterday. I continued to scramble to look for one that maybe fell onto the floor. Then I remember I had swept the floor yesterday. I decided to check yesterday’s newly disposed trash amidst the coffee grinds and food scraps. Lo! And behold! I found ONE plastic screw cover that was swept away last night! I quickly banged it into the inside of my cabinet door to subdue the offensive screw that left the scratch. Fortunately I also saved the wood putty from my carpenters use and fixed the frame of my cabinet and the problem disappeared. That is why I hate throwing things away!
The 20/20 rule shared by The Minimalists is helpful for this purpose. If you can replace the item for less than $20 in 20 minutes, then you don’t need to save it “just in case” because you can easily buy the item again at your local store. What they’ve found is that they’ve almost NEVER actually needed to replace any of the items they got rid of using this rule - I think Josh said he may have needed to buy one pair of flip flops. In most cases, they’ve found that even if they could have used the disposed of item, they were able to get by without replacing it.
"128"? Thank you! You have warmed an exiled Bostonian's heart.
Hi Loren, Yes, that's right! Boston. Where are you living now? Hope you enjoyed the video! Thanks for subscribing! Laura
@@ClutterClarity: For longer than I expected, northeast PA. I did enjoy the vid, apart from the twinge of nostalgia.(Yes, even for the World's Longest Parking Lot.) I guess I'll have to broom that, too.
2 hours a week is great! Thank you! I've been trying to do 1 hour per day, but my schedule is limited. I think I can manage 2 hours per week though.
Hi Courtney, One hr every other day or 3 days a week. Build a routine that suits your priorities. Decluttering the calendar is often one of the first steps to give you more time to take care of your home. Everyone's schedule is full, until you make decluttering a priority through time. Fit your priorities together so you have a nice rhythm to your week. Thanks for subscribing. If you want more or to stay connected, I'm starting webinars next Thursday. You can go to ClutterClarity.com to learn more and register. Enjoy your progress! Take care, Laura
I think growing up poor makes you hesitate to throw things away.
That scarf ❤️!
My mother told me my problem was I never put anything away. She was 100% Correct. I tell her in heaven every time I start to clean up.
I am trying to declutter faster than what I am accumulating. ☺ I have things in a big black bag for the Goodwill that I got as far as my suv and there it has been for weeks now! Thank you for your laid back motivation.
Hi Patricia, I suggest you slow down on the accumulating, and decluttering. You want to set a steady pace, not a fast speed. That can be very tiring. Before you put a big bag in your car, schedule a time to take it to goodwill. Time management is an important part of this work. Build a routine, and a specific day each week or month to make a delivery. Literally schedule it in your calendar, and you are much more likely to get it done! Yah-dah :-) Enjoy, and thank you for subscribing! Grateful, Laura
Thank you 🙏
So I’m still in the process of decluttering our home (move #1), to decluttering parents home that included the estate of my sister, to move #2 that required the move & downsizing from 4000 sq ft to 2300 sq ft. We moved in February, into the new house in March, visit our son in another state May- September, back to new home. It’s now time to hang art & reduce family photo collections! Lots of duplicates, but I’ve reached the state of “has to go” & stop assigning emotional value to the pictures
SERIOUSLY, if I didnt force myself, like exercise, I'd never feel like doing it.
But I do do it, little by little, like one box or tote at a time. Plus I give myself rewards.
Hi Julie, From my perspective, you're deciding it is important enough to do, making it a priority, and doing what needs to be done. All choices. Sure, you may not feel like doing it at the time rolls around... That's true for all of us. Instead of force, ID and attach yourself to your higher motivation. It's much easier to do whatever we need to do when it's aligned with what' motivates us. Resistance dissolves when attached to emotional purpose. Good luck and thanks for subscribing!
Force myself to do 10 minutes of something and then it becomes a longer time.
Hi Julie, This is a common practice. Glad it works for you, seriously. I see it ... because you don't feel like it, you use force to get yourself to exercise. Wouldn't it be easier if you could get in position (emotionally) to want (motivation) to exercise, and chose to do it without the force. Less stressful all around. I'm glad your exercising. Hope you enjoy it once you get started. Take care, Laura
@@CharlotteFairchild Totally agree. If I say I'm gonna wash a cup or a plate, I'm more likely on a roll and job done. If I look at a pile of dishes to be done...ugh! 😲😳😣 and the procrastination begins...😁
My problem is that I just have too much of things that I really love....fabric, yarn, sewing machines, Pyrex, photos, craft tools, and supplies for someday projects. I am very clean and organized, but I have too much. It is time to share with friends and give some supplies away. I have found in the past that sometimes people are reluctant to accept things that they said they wanted...”Why, what is wrong with it?” Then I feel like I am pushing it on them. Charity places may be the answer.
Betty Hazel I can relate with those items too! For myself, I found that public school teachers, especially elementary welcome crafting supplies for art classes. You could donate extras to shelters for new supplies you have, they often House families or abuse victims with children who would use some supplies. Donate to Good will or the like and get tax write off. Just some thoughts I’ve found helped myself and others.🙂
Laura/Mrs.Clutter Clarity: Please come to the Waltham public library to do a talk like this one!!! You will be more than welcome:) your gentleness and expertise are contagious!! Can you please do a workshop or UA-cam video on electronic clutter and how to organize digitally for those who don’t have a clue? Thanks:):)God bless you:)
Hi there, Thanks for the invitation, but my schedule is full. Also, I'm not the right person for electronic/computer organizing. Go to NAPO-NE.net (or .org) and research the organizers to find someone with that skill. Good luck, and thank you for subscribing and sharing the videos with friends and family. Grateful, my best to you, Laura
Thanks Laura for getting back to my comments:) Do you have tips for organizing/decluterring for folks with ADD? :) I would love to see you in the area,I live in Waltham and the invitation for you to present at the Waltham public library is still on!! There are so many people there who can benefit from your knowledge,kindness and expertise:) God bless you:)
@@priusa8113 Thanks for writing. Go to NAPO-NE.net (org?) and find an organizer her specializes in working with people with ADD. They won't have my approach, but many offer kindness and knowledge, etc. too. Good luck! Laura
thank you xxxx
I have found that if I listen to good subliminals about an hour before I start, I start getting "Itchy feet" to get things done before the hour is up. I cant count how many cold cups of coffee I've come back to! :D
Well, that's an original way to get started! 😊 Perhaps you'll learn alternatives to coffee. You don't want to rev yourself up and speed through; you want to show up and be present, going slow enough to give you time to think it through, trust your decisions... and enjoy. Good luck! Laura PS. Thanks for subscribing, if you want.
If someone told you you had to move and be out of your house in 3 hours what would you take with you.?
Excellent ideas...we know the concept but fresh viewpoints are good. My clothes not bad but I like to kick off my shoes in the door..so..in the FHA required closet in foyers (in old days) I hung my shoe thing over inside of the door. Sometimes I do pretty well, sometimes I din't. But at least I have a fighting chance of all the shoes that I normally wear in the same area. I'll take it...
Thanks Gail! A fresh perspective makes all the tips easier to do. Good luck with your shoes! Please subscribe to get future videos, posted each Friday. You remind me of a client (posting on my blog) with her large collection of shoes, we moved after she decluttered. Enjoy!
Just build a routine to bring your shoes back to order every week, Sundays maybe. Off the floor and into the shoe thing over the door. Then it doesn't get out of control. Take care of it in little bits through time, and you have more than a fighting chance! Please subscribe to get notice of future videos! Uploading a new one once a week through summer. Thanks and Enjoy!
Hi Gail, thanks for commenting. Part of the work is to create routines to simply brings spaces back to order before they get overwhelming. Good luck! Please subscribe to get notice of future videos, posted on Fridays. Thanks, and ENJOY!
Hm. I get her repeating to not Force, but sometimes we do need to if we are even going to get started. Once we do get going however, the force really don’t need to be there.
Overwhelm can make you come to a grinding halt and give up but I also think it can be good for to be able to take a step back and be more decesive. The KM’s overwhelm certainly is meant to be a good thing, making you Want a change and when you have that big overview and not just a small piece at a time you more easily spot duplicates and other things you see more clearly you don’t need even want.
I see what you mean... thanks for bringing this up. Before the "force" is really a decision to try again. Most of this work is about getting in position to choose what's best for you. It's a lot easier when you aren't forcing yourself to do something, and instead get into alignment to want to. Emotional management and time management are the two prerequisites. Yes, you always want to step back when overwhelmed, and re-think your position with a fresh perspective. Biggest mistake is to do too much too fast, too hard in too little time. Slowing down and pacing yourself really helps prevent feeling overwhelmed. Hope this helps. Enjoy and thanks for subscribing. Laura
what if u have a time limit ie people are coming to inspect your home.x
I got some new draws today nd cleaned them first second hand. Then set them up nd well 12 hours later I was done ornagized nd cleaned nd vacuumed moved things round disposed of trash read a few diaries nd notes which then I trashed so it did not feel like 12hours but it was
Husband comes from cluttering family. I want open space where eventually everything is neat. Hard to always find a balance.
A lot of couples struggle with this. Requires negotiation new agreements. Public areas, bedrooms not dumping areas for stuff, for example. Once a week put things back where they belong. Once a month spend 3 hours decluttering. Just examples. We don't "always" have balance... because we are in constant motion, changing. Learn how to bring yourself back into balance or take care of things when you start to go out of balance, not when things are really out of balance. Hope this helps. Thanks for subscribing, and enjoy! Take care, Laura
Loved this video. Have subscribed. Can I just ask my husband has Asperger and part of his condition is heavy duty hoarding. Like the US tv shows although I’ve managed to contain this to 3 rooms in our flat. I have cerebral palsy and I’m finding increasingly harder to deal with and tidy and move/contain as I putting things our causes physical distress. Do you know of any good resources for this specific question and I’ll use you’re other insights on the clutter I can tackle in other rooms. Sorry for the long question 😳😊
I’m so sorry, that sounds very difficult. I hope you find sone professional help!
I de-clutter every 3 months. It might sound drastic....but it works. I am not allowed to buy anything new without placing something into my purge pile.
Doesn't sound drastic at all. You have a really good prevention strategy. After an initial intervention and clearing out, I will work with clients on a quarterly basis to help them stay organized. Or things are so much easier, they can do it on their own. Everyone needs a plan like yours to prevent things from piling up. Good for you! Thanks for subscribing. Take care, Laura
Get them close to the door... excellent 👌
Forced to get rid of all in my 60's life what a mess, tired after my Husband died and finding I have to get out due to finances, sad!!
Sorry for your troubles. Decluttering is part of the preparing for the impermanence of life as we know it. Can be a struggle. Hope things get better for you soon. Thanks for subscribing, and take care, Laura
Hope that you are Doing Well. By your Comment, you had "lost" you're Husband, and it seemed that you were just very Overwhelmed.
@@Kiki-yo4hi Hi Kiki, Not sure what you're referring to, but thank you for your concern. Stay well, and thanks for subscribing. Laura
@@ClutterClarityThought that I was Sending my Reply to Diamondinae. Your Response to Her was Perfect.
Hi - We all need to go through this transition ("get rid of")at some point as we get older. All of our lives gets smaller. Focus on what you can take with you. Sorry for your troubles. Reach out to senior services, town services to get help. Take care, Laura
I’m the clothes kinda gal. Clean, they can set on the bed! 60 years old. Clean house, I put them up so my mind clears
I so need to overcome my mess at home. I will be free finally.
Hi Lorna, Most of us need help along the way. The biggest mistake I find is people try to do too much too fast too hard in too little time, and just keep on causing their own overwhelm. Reach out to someone to help you in your home. Respect the resistance. The work is more complex than meets the eye. Hope these videos are helping or maybe an online course. Coming in 2021. Thanks for subscribing - More videos coming soon! Take care, Laura
@@ClutterClarity thank you. Yes will try one step at a time. X
I can’t imagine waking up to a week’s worth of clothes to dispense. Every now and then I leave them undone till the next morning, but I would never have clothes if I waited a week lol
Hi Francine, Glad you have a strategy. Everyone is different. The strategy needs to fit the person's lifestyle and preferences. The idea is to have a routine to take care of our stuff. glad you have one! Thanks for subscribing. Take care, Laura
This doesn't really work for me but, I can see where it help others. When I start working I don't stop until 8 to 10 later. I was able to get through my entire kitchen in over two weekends. I pretty much had to clean everything because I had a mouse in the cabinet and in the drawers. this happens every fall so this is what I consider my fall clean out of the kitchen. As soon as I know the mice are exterminated I set to work.
Hi Laura, Yes, sometimes it's good to work in longer stretches, but often that leads to unnecessary exhaustion or mistakes. You sound very steady and able - good for you. Thanks for your comments, and subscribing! Take care, Laura
You’re absolutely right I have been doing that and I have got quite a bit to get rid of and I am so happy because I want to get rid of a lot of my clutter and one day I’m going to have a yard sale and then I will be happy I got rid of that clutter but I don’t have a lot of clutter not like worse to the point you can’t walk in the house right ther you’re absolutely right I have been doing that and I have got quite a bit to get rid of and I am so happy because I want to get rid of a lot of my clutter and one day I’m going to have a yard sale and then I will be happy I got rid of that clutter but I don’t have a lot of clutter But you’re absolutely right it feels great to get rid of stuff and get it out-of-the-way need to do this more once a week like you were saying I started doing that on my own and found that is very true it makes you happier and it just makes you feel a lot of loads took off of you I am very happy to get rid of the junk but some stuff but I still have to work on getting rid of
For me, garage sale sounded good but the only real progress I made was to finally take stuff to charities. Otherwise, you'll find yourself like me-just moving clutter from one place to another and never seeing the pile go down. Plus garage sales are a lot of work for little money. Just my 2 cents worth. Good luck whatever you decide.
Loved it!
Subscribed!
Am I the only one distracted by the white board? Not the messiness - I don't mind that, but the fact that I feel that I'm missing a lot of info.
check out her other videos, I think its all available in bits and pieces, I think its part of the explanation of how forcing yourself leads to overwhelming yourself and frustration which means/ blocking actual progress.
I can appreciate your experience. If you watch all the videos, you won't miss a thing :-) Take care, Laura
Too busy decluttering.
I can appreciate your feeling of missing out. Watch all the videos, and the pieces will come together. Enjoy, and thanks for subscribing. Grateful, Laura
Saaammme
You are lovely and fantastic! Thank you!
Thank you! So glad you are finding them useful, meaningful. Please subscribe to enjoy future videos. Uploading new ones every week through the summer. Take care, Laura
Thank you so much for the feedback. If you like, please subscribe, and ENJOY. Future videos posted on Fridays.
I love " Putter through your Clutter."
It helps doesn't it! Decluttering doesn't need to be so hard if you're willing to learn new skills and mindset! Thanks for subscribing to get new videos, and sharing! Laura
Cool scarf🖒
Thanks, I love the scarf. Enjoy, and thanks for subscribing! Grateful, Laura
Slow ,think , be present and figure it out Freeze Stay engaged in the decision making Freezing is good for health Thanks a lot
From now on...Me first....tasks second..,Thank you so much to teach us to value ourselves. That's the most difficult thing to inculcate in a woman 😚🐝🐞😊🌿☘
Knee3 Knee defecting
All I need to do is watch Hoarders to get energized to clean and dispose of items. Luckily my cable company has stored episodes available 24/7...
Hi - Yes, that's one way to stay motivated. Some people are negatively motivated, moving away from stuff, others positively motivated, towards stuff. Good luck! Laura
I was trying to understand what she meant about not wanting time put her clothes away when she comes home from work does that mean a whole weeks worth of clothes whatever she has worn that she finally puts away on Saturday or Sunday mornings well where is it collecting all week over the back of a chair? On the floor? That would drive me crazy to have all that clutter laying around all week. Oh well maybe I’m not getting it
The basic principle: How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Stop seeing that massive task before you and do a little task.
You're so right! The elephant in the room, one bite at a time. There is a sequence to the decluttering process, though that makes the chewing easier. Thanks for subscribing! Take care, Laura
These tip are handy if you also live with someone who hates to put their clothes away everyday. It gives me a new understanding of that person instead of being mad.
Hi Suzanne, understanding, and also gaining some negotiation skills help a great deal. There are ways to find greater cooperation. If you like, join me for upcoming fall webinars. A new video describes them. Thanks for your comment, and subscribing. Take good care, Laura
When you live with others who don't comply? how do you convince without the argument..?
Hi Sherri, A lot of people ask me this question... Everyone is different. The best I can say generally is "lead by example." Usually they follow out of shame :-) Regularly take care of the stuff that is yours to declutter and organize. You need negotiation skills to make agreements. You do not want to be a non-paid storage bin for adult children. Set a date, and tell them their stuff will be tossed/donated if they don't go through it. Hard to do, but possible. Husbands/Partners need to be respected. He may not be able to do the work, be an obstructionist, or anxious about his own mortality... The work is complex so focus on what would feel good for you to do, and take care of that. Good luck! Thanks for subscribing, and sharing videos with friends and family. Take care, Laura
I have an immaculate home. Everything is on order but I have a lot of junk. So I have one room, one room, one room that is up to the door. My wife got tired of cleaning them we got a cat then the hair then the cat now owns the house, everything went in a box and into the spare room. The room is to the point you can’t walk in. I want to display my things but my wife is tired of cleaning them and I don’t want cat hair all over so this creates a major problem for me. Another thing, my wife is OCD and when I bring out a box to go through it I must put it back together neatly. I keep telling her that I need to make a mess in order to clear this up.. Help! I have suggested she takes a trip so I can actually create the mess I want to create in order to fix it. I need a week! What do I do my fellow friends?
Definitely send her on a trip then deal with your belongings while she's gone.
I understand this approach but motivation can't be used for building habits. It is not sustainable to always wait the motivation. Waiting for motivation is what got me into this mess in the first place.
I can get rid of my clutter but not my husband’s - that will always stay problematic for me. He is always buying new things - drives me nuts! How can one live in one house together when one (me) constantly wants to declutter and he constantly will not.
Clutter maker always wins. Just make your room a no parking zone and learn to live with the rest.
dekutree64 - i think you are right. I am giving up the struggle. It frustrates me but i keep my own space nice and tidy and free of clutter.
Yes, if you can, have conversations about the areas you most want to have stay (relatively) clear, and where you can put his stuff (a basket etc) ...
Nadya King thank you-i will certainly try this approach
Pat Boertee Same here. My us and should get a job making houses look lived in. He can fill a space with all his bits in no time.
Oh my goodness, I need a video like this. I am a very clean neat and organized person that likes things minimalistic. However, after 6 years of caring for a parent 24/7, working 40 hours plus from home, hosting every holiday, cooking, cleaning, shopping and having serious health issues myself.... my home became out of control. We sold our 2nd home (3000 + sq ft), sold my Dad’s home (2500 sq ft) for him to come live with us, then sold mother in-laws home (1600 sq foot). We absorbed all this stuff. We have our own home (almost 3000 sq ft,) 2 car garage and 2 huge storage units full of stuff. I spend more days in bed than out, due to high pain levels. I spend many days just being overwhelmed by boxes, misc items that I have no idea what to do with IE: boxes and boxes of family VHS tapes, family keepsakes, coin collections etc. I got rid of tons of things so far but still have a long way to go. I have been at this for over 1.5 years now after my dad passed away but now mother in law is in hospice. I am so stuck right now. Overwhelmed is an understatement. I have no life now except to sort on the days I am feeling strong enough to do it. (Had to leave my job as I was too sick). Slowly we are scanning all the paper work to get rid of legal boxes but, I am tormenting myself with decisions to get rid of things that I may regret later when the dust settles so to speak. I like your idea of sorting 2 hours a week however at that rate, it feels like I will never get done. Perhaps this is safer way to go emotionally, as I feel like I am in sinking sand and losing my way.
I read your difficulties and I too would be overwhelmed if facing such challenges. Suggestion! If you can afford it, hire some help. Even a day or two can make a dent in “the stuff”. I found it to be very helpful especially if you are in a city you don’t know well. Also, call up charities to come pick up. They can be a great help. Hospice staff I have known are wonderful and I hope they are helping you thru some of this. I volunteer in an ICU and often visitors need to recharge themselves as emotionally they are exhausted. I send you love.
More info PLEASE!
Karlie, perhaps look at all the other videos for more information. Subscribe to my UA-cam channel to get more. I'll be posting a new video every Friday through the summer. Enjoy!
Other videos are available! And visit ClutterClarity.com, subscribe to our monthly newsletter... more good stuff there. Good luck!
Love a clutter free house but the problem is my husbands clutter?🥰
"Don't force yourself"... Well, guess what'll never happen...
By force, what I mean is the spirit in which you do the work. Acceptance and choosing to the work lends itself to an easier ride through. Forcing yourself typically slows us down because it naturally creates resistance. How you enter this work is very important to making it easier. Can you do the work out of choice, willingness? Good luck, and thanks for subscribing! Laura
The lack of empathy from the adult children is mind boggling.
Where is this class? I want to go to one - and take hubby with me! We have a storage unit (full of everything we had when we went homeless) and we need to get rid of it but I can't figure out where it should go. I don't have the funds to have someone haul it all away. We aren't homeless now but we are very downsized from where we previously lived.
Hi, New class in October 2018 in Concord, MA and 3 new webinars in October, too! Don't know where you live so pick what's best for you. You can go to my website ClutterClairty.com for details. Hope you can join us! Thanks for subscribing! Grateful, Laura
Clutter Clarity Dang, I'm in Southern CA so I can't make it. Great videos though.
You can come to the ClutterClarity fall Webinars! Perfect for distance learning :-) There on my website under Enjoy Learning Online (in right margin). Hope you can join us!
Check in your area -- some charity shops and non-profits (for example, Salvation Army, Goodwill, St. Vincent de Paul) might have a truck available with helpful drivers who can pick up your donations and/or large items for free, by appointment, on dates up to 4-8 weeks or so in the future (because they are so busy). Also, some of your large or heavy donated items may be "at the driver's discretion" to accept, depending on whether the items are saleable or not (whether they are nonworking, in poor condition, etc.).
you can't declutter your mother . she will always be your mother .
You can distance yourself from your mother, though. Don't live in the past story. You may want to visit your past, but don't reside there. What happens now is up to you. Your decision, not your mother's fault. We all have a history to let go or rearrange to continue to grow. Not easy, but necessary. Good luck, Laura Thanks for subscribing! Grateful. Laura
She's just saying not to do stuff that make you sad. Some people need to stay away from their mothers! Some mothers make us sad!
Maybe start by getting rid of pens that no longer put out.
Or get rid of the three articles of clothing you haven't warn I'm two years because they are ripped, stained, or just not something you want to wear anymore.
The EASY Way, to Not have Clothes lying all over the place . . .as you are taking them off, Decide right then and there, Dirty, or Can Wear Again, and Put Them Where They Need to Be.Then, you won't Have to spend Valuable Time Later, Dealing with them.
HI Kiki, Thanks for your comment. Most people know this, but have trouble doing it while they are hurrying off to the next thing or habitually do what they have always done. Thanks for subscribing, and take care, Laura
go on vacation or somewhere else for a month. Think back to your house and tell someone to go get your items that you treasure the most. Your memory will serve you
I hate putting clothes away.
I believe you but can't understand it. I hate seeing clothes lying around.
I got 20 years of stuff
Hi Rose, Glad it's only 20 years! Some people have 40 years of stuff. Start decluttering now, so things don't pile up on your in the years ahead. We're never done. Decluttering is just part of life so we can keep our homes and selves in balance. If challenged, just means that you need to learn a new approach. Good luck, and thanks for subscribing! Laura