What HE'S THINKING When He Wants To BREAK UP With You | Matthew Hussey
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- Опубліковано 5 лют 2025
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In this week's episode of LOVELife, I take a call from Sophia to discuss what could have been going through her ex's mind when he broke up with her, as well as how she can move on with her head held high.
Video links at the end -
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If a man wants to make you a priority in his life. He will. Period.
100% I learned this the hard way.
Flutterby 84 not just men, women too. If you’re valuable to the person, they make you a priority
Connor Riccilli yes absolutely! I agree 😊
I agree with you, if everything else is a priority for him and she's in last place he's not the right match for her
I'm The Prize me too unfortunately. I hope you’re happier now.
Once a man leaves you never go back, period! It will become a continuous pattern and he will feel that you are a doormat. Have some self respect and move on.
Thanks
T- Yes, Regret Nothing. PEACE.
Yep! He'll do it again.
such a reality
Don't want to be someone door mat .. let go ..
I wish men would use more words than leaving everything unsaid
My ex couldnt even communicate. I had to break up with me for him😐
Smh
My ex had been unhappy for months. MONTHS. AND HE NEVER COMMUNICATED IT TO ME. And then he cheated on me for seven months, while we were living together, instead of doing the respectful thing towards me, and letting me go. Instead of communicating and dealing with conflict like an adult (he's also 30), he handled it like a teenager sneaking behind my back. Although now he's with a 21 year-old who has no self-respect for herself (she was the side piece, I told her he'd been cheating on me with her, and she doesn't want to leave him)
Emma J wow it’s like you are talking through my mouth except we were not living together. I would let them be, keep silence and you’ll see eventually he will come back after he’s done with her (they all come back).
It's pretty simple with men... If he wants to be with you, he will. There's no underlying meaning or anything to interpret. If a guy loves you and wants you, he will move mountains to be with you. If he doesn't he won't.
I'm a woman, but sometimes I just keep quiet and prefer to not say anything. It's more like I'm exasperated. Whatever I said, he'd not believe me and he'd come to his own conclusion so nothing I'd say will matter...why do I come to that conclusions, other discussion and talks have always boiled down to him not believing me or not trusting what I say or feel even when I was being very honest. So...yeah...
If he loves you, he will be willing to grow with you, experience life with you. If he doesn’t love you, you will always be an option because if the man loves you, he will never want to see you with another man or picturing you with another man. That’s why, I have decided to truly let him go because I am always an option to him.
VERY WELL SAID
So true.
Thank you for this.
So true. I think the song”When A man loves a woman “ says it all. If a man truly loves a woman he will walk through the gates of hell to keep her, otherwise he’s not enough for you.
I can recommend you to Dr EDIALE is spells and manifestations are the best
You know what's really frustrating? The lack of communication. If during all those months he was feeling bad about the relationship, he had doubts, whatever, and he didn't say anything about it it's extremely frustrating that he was incapable of communicating with his partner letting her believe everything was all right, and then, all of a sudden he comes up with this speech of "I feel bad, I wanna break up". How do you think that makes us feel? What hurts the most is that if he (meaning every guy in this situation) had opened his mouth before, maybe we could have found a solution together. Maybe not, but at least you both know that you tried. I know that expressing feelings doesn't come easy to all of us, but it's something that we should all try to do. So for everybody out there: don't let everything go so far that there's no return. Speak at the right time.
This. I wish he did this.
+Su Tash This is interesting because I had the same reaction and the host Matthew he addresses that perhaps you missed it but he put a new and very interesting point of view on it. He was saying that the man really cared about her and was hugely conflicted which is why he struggled for months with this and he wasn't able to just make an immediate decision. He said that the caller should if not anything take that as a huge sort of compliment or validation to the relationship. I thought his response was truly well thought out , and really shed light on the male perspective and approach to thinking.
I did get that he valued the relationship, I got the point that Mathew was trying to make. My point is different; it lies on the lack of (or defficient) communication between the partners, which causes most of the problems a couple can have.
omggg!! this happened to me omgg it so true
I think sometimes when a long relationship between younger people in their 20s ends, is not always because there was a problem that needed to be tackled. Sometimes the guy, or even the girl, needs to find out what else is out there for them before they commit to someone for the rest of their lives. Settling down at a young age is easily done but not easy to follow through. The ones who become aware of this are actually making the right choice, especially when they are choosing pain over their comfort zone to begin with.
lol... it means he's not done playing and he doesn't want to commit. I've learned that a man can have a mental breakdown in front of you and STILL be lying.
Brandi Miller very true
YES!!!!!
Brandi Miller That would be a narcissistic sociopath.
not true im a guy your talking to a guy that never cries love hurts and it dosen't matter how big muscles he will cry if he is hurt i think girls are selfish
YES!!!! Lies for MONTHS on end! They swear they’re finally telling you everything and bawling their eyes out while lying!
I think Matthew is talking about a good man who is truly confused and afraid. But I’m reluctant to trust that this guy is one of them. This girl sounds like such a sweetheart and she deserves someone who is 100% sure about her.
Yep I agree. Plus she sounds so apple pie and a guy who's not yet ready to settle down doesn't stay with apple pie when what he actually wants is usually a huge creamy choux pastry with cream spilling out from all sides.
Yeah, this reads to me like a covert narcissist who already had someone else.
If this was the other way around would you be saying the same thing?
Xavier Triggs Yes!
If someone can’t see the next phase of their life with you in it, or enjoying/coping with the present seems a better option without you, and also lets it go on for months without communicating because they’re trying to think of a way to end it that doesn’t make them look awful when it’ll likely blindside you, then they can’t see your worth and there’s almost no coming back from that. Male, female, young, old and everything in between. Let them go, build your life.
@@mananexus no we all watched how her kids father and everyone did her
I’m a guy and this helped me a lot. My girlfriend left me for someone else and I am still in a lot of pain. If you’re a girl and you’re reading this, I hope it helps to know that not all guys are jerks, and that some of us actually go through the same difficulties you are going through. And if you’re a guy, know that you’re not alone and that there’s at least one guy out there who understands your pain.
Its nice to know guys go through the same thing ,
@MMM MMM thank you for your kind words. I am now in a much better place and helping guys who once were in my shoes. I wish this doesn’t ever happen to anyone else, but happening to me has made me stronger. I wish all of you the best. If I could have gotten over it, so can ANYONE. Believe in yourself.
@@drbadzer just got into the same situation as you. My gf just broke up with me out of the blue when i visited her. It hurt to know that you visit her to have fun and ended up she broke up with me 😞
@@simonpra134 stay strong. It will hurt a lot, and it WILL get a lot worse before it gets better. But it WILL get better, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now. My prayers go to you my man
@@drbadzer thank you and what should you do if she start to contact me?
I hope Sophia finds someone who deserves her.
You just dont understand what this man is saying
TimshawkTX KSA why???
Yes, it's hard to understand selfishness and commitment phobic men!
me too, best of luck to her ♥️
Liz- Yes, Regret Nothing. PEACE.
Relationships are so tiresome. All hiding, coding, decoding and camouflage.
+Shanebabys Players are good at that.
If girls are better at that, then I need to improve what I'm doing because clearly I don't do enough of it.
This guys is so good with words he fixed the broken heart I never had haha
Kaynasou lmao
It's true. I cry just listening to him sometimes. :-)
Kaynasou 😂
Kaynasou 😂👏👏👏👍
he was def jealous of her and the lack of communication was him punishing her for it.
An ex of mine did that also. He ended up marrying a girl. She cheated on him with a hippie. Kharma does exist.
Oh girl :(
''With a hippie'', hahahaaaa! You deserve better, girl!
Thanks to doctor Uguel for bringing my ex back to me. My girlfriend left me for no reason for almost seven months I did everything possible to bring her back but nothing work out for me until I met a friend of mine who introduced me to doctor Uguel that have help so many people that has relationship or marriage problems. I sent a mail to the email address he gave me and the spell caster responded and tell me not to worry that my ex will come back to me after 3 days. But hopefully my girlfriend comes back to me with much of love and affection. If you have any relationship or marriage problems contact him for solutions to all your problems. His email druguelspellhome1@gmail.com or WhatsApp number +2347056683626.
oh geez
Girl hallelujah, can not wait to see dat from my ex..he just left me after my botched gallblader surgery & I know for a fact he has been with someone else for the past 10months. Love when karma comes back knockn..sorry to say always get a very sweet revenge.
Since I"m a guy and it sounds like he's scared of losing all the ladies by being tied down but if he truly loves you he won't risk losing you trust me I know that feeling
Thanks for speaking on this as a guy. It's nice to be reminded that most guys aren't like the example in this video and there are guys that aren't going to give an excuse that his behavior "is a guy thing". Thanks again.
I am a girl and I agree with you 100%.
HitmanKing Jay you’re handsome
Jay...that's my experience too. A man will not take the chance for other men to snag her if he truly loves a woman.
HitmanKing Jay thank you
If someone TRULY LOVES you with ALL their heart then they wouldnt take the risk of losing you.
spot on :)
Exactly!!!
Aww, aren't you a sweet little fairy tale
I think so too but I never had these feelings so I don't know
right.
Ladies, as a 54-year-old, twice-married woman who has also dated many men, I give you this advice:
Live and love freely in the moment. Love them for them, for your time together, what he does for you, your connections, etc.
If you love them because you think he's going to stay with you forever, you love the idea of having a
lasting relationship more than you love him.
If he wants to leave. Don't hate him. Don't feel betrayed. His reasons do not matter.
Reflect on the many good times you shared instead of feeling lost and angry over a future together that didn't happen.
I give the exact advice to men who are heartbroken and angry when their woman leaves them.
no problem then. you can just sleep with guys you meet in bars after your looks are competly gone
Thats stupid. Is this world just ony a throw away society, or what?!
Oh im bored, ill change the guy/women. Oh he hasnt enoough money, bye! Oh i want to use you for 2 years and them ill decide to change my residence.
Its disgusting these days.
Dont you ever ask yourself why doesnt any man want to stay with me? I mean, something in you or in me too, is causing this divorce or break ups too. Its too easy to say good next, please. We have to try to change ourselfs getting better for our dreams. And one day it will last.
My boyfriend of more than two years just broke up with me. I want to thank you, because what you wrote here helped me to feel less lost.
Eliška Linhartová I’m so sorry to hear that.. I’m a week in from my breakup. Besides chats/hang outs with good friends, I’m watching Matthews videos about break ups everyday for encouragement and support. Hope you’ve found something that works! Hang in there lady!! 💕
Cristina Lee We broke up just yesterday! Do these things help? I'm in so much pain
He was crying because he cares for you because of all the times you’ve been together but clearly whatever his reasons were, he is no longer in love with you. Been there... hugs...
hello dear, do you need any help? I can help you, it worked for me .., let's talk better💕💕💕
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My ex and mine broke up just a week ago. He was my first year long boyfriend but we rarely ever saw eachother because we dont drive, we're working, and he's in university. We were both heartbroken, but his whole thing was that he fell out of love with me because we lost that physical connection. Maybe one day we'll get it back, but as of right now..it hurts so goddamn much
He's a coward. Just like my ex. Same situation: he's 28 and he gave up on me because of work ... He thinks I'm too much for him, he can't offer me the things I deserve (especially his time and commitment) , he says I deserve someone better... But I just think he's not trying enough ...if he loved me, he would fight for this relationship, make time etc.. I feel sorry for the girl, I hope things are better now. Matt, I like your advice!
💖
roxxy_a same situation with my ex
roxxy_a same..
At least he gave you an excuse. I found out my ex real reason for not enough time 4 me was bc he was really engaged smh 😤 such an asshole
roxxy_a in the same situation right now. I thought he was the one. I was not his
No contact. Period.
If he comes back...let go. Period.
If he doesn't? Even better
He doesn't know what he had. Let him grow on his own terms and don't let their level make you fall. Stay strong with those who prove they want to be with you.
Easy as that.
Ms. Marie The Book Sniffer - Omg its so easier said then done especially when it's a long relationship!! How do you get over the heart break?💔
Ms. Marie The Book Sniffer agreed
Actually that's a hard decision. But one must think if he or she wants to go through the same emotional bleeding again. Because if he/she did it once, they can do it again... Things never return to what they were before such an episode. That's for sure.
He’s met someone else. When she said that he told her the excitement is gone, he means it. I was on the other side of that scenario. He may care but he’s into someone else and it’s the guilt that had him so emotional. But he gone.
This is me...took me on a freaking birthday holiday then kapuuut...oh yes n said he had a crush on a girl at work...
So obvious. Can't believe Matt missed that key statement. He told her what she wanted to hear. Disappointed.
PREACH!! SPOT ON! 👍🏾🔥💯
@@LydiaZ36 I've learned from listening to so many coaches which, I was so excited about in the beginning, that this industry too, is all about that paper!⚠️💲
You're right.
A man leaves because he doesn't want you. Men never ever leave something they don't want to lose. If he comes back don't take him back. Don't let a man have to tell you that he doesn't want you twice. There are exceptions but generally, this is the case.
This is why as soon as he dumped with coldness i blocked him everywhere. He wanted to give something i borrowed him back to me...i gave him my dads phone nr and it was my dad that retrieved. The bastard doesnt deserve to see my face. If he ever crosses me on the street i will look straightforward, head up high like he never existed. He will regret this, i was a good listener, i cared. But its not my problem anymore.
Thank you
Yeah learned this
I agree. It's one thing if he is just a little absent, more with his friends then starts paying attention again. But if he keeps everything but dumps you, you were the expendable part of his life.
you write so eloquently and sound so wise!! i agree (even though sometimes we don't follow our own advice, i would know).
Wow... Mind blowing! Many people say "It's better for you to move on"/"Show him you're happy with or without him". For the first time this piece of advice has been given with something tangible to work with, that ACTUALLY MAKES SENSE! This has been put so simply and clearly, the first time this advice has felt so down to earth and personal. The past 2 weeks I have been the most depressed ever in my life, and it's terrifying to think that break-ups have this affect on us! Depression makes us also distorts our clarity, its so dangerous! I was going mad trying so hard to battle with it and not knowing what to do or how to get out of this excruciatingly painful situation. Until literally, these words finally connected with me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart Matthew. What you're doing is wonderful! Also, thank you Sophia for the question every lady wants answered! 💖
I saw your screen name and thought you were Sophia lol I was gonna ask for an update :)
I thought Sofia sounded pretty brave!! i think she's going to be ok..
SophieMiaSunshine good job kick him to the curve
sophie I have to admit you sound like you deserve a man who values you and never let go. because you are beautiful spirit and girl
I cried listening to your story. I can't imagine the heartbreak from a break up after 2-1/2 years. I hope you find happiness in life again.
My marriage of 20 years is ending because he’s always felt like he’s missed out because of me and the kids...this video reassured me my decision to let him live the life he thinks he wants .. was the right one...life is too short. I hope one day he realizes we were everything he needed...now I’m going to find me again ❤️
I'm so sorry this happened to you :( He will have realised how much he lost almost straight away, even if he didn't show it. How are you now, 2 years on? If you don't mind me asking! x
yeah, how are you doing these days?
@@RizzaGuia14 I was about to ask that, too lol.
Update?💕
Thank you guys for asking that’s incredibly sweet. He shows up all the time and keeps asking to reconcile. I will never , I couldn’t , too much pain. Kids and I are in therapy, and we’re thriving. I spent many years chasing happiness and now we’re feeling it. Maybe in another two years I’ll have my forever person 🥰
I honestly couldnt allow myself to want after somebody who doesn't want me. I have to much pride, make yourself over and move on. Btw its not that personal... if a guy really wants you NOTHING will deter him, and if he doesnt want you.. he will have a thousand excuses.
'make yourself over', kinda like stop being sad and start being awesome instead :) I like you wording and may use it as a self pep talk in future :)
I used to feel the same way...thought that I wouldn't want someone who didn't want me. To my surprise when I found myself in that scenario I was more focused on emoting and feeling my feelings than pride or embarrassment. To this day I am so happy I expressed my desire to him. I don't know if I'd do that again but I have 0 regrets about it. It's so freeing to just feel. I digress.
He is guilty that why the chinise people have his family
Just leave him in the dust you don't owe him
ccrow06 I think it’s great to respect and honour ones feelings, my point is if a person point blank , clearly rejects you, I would have enough self respect to move on.
Thank you so much. You made me come out of depression. I recently had a breakup and he just said almost the same things, exactly what happened to Sophia. And yes he will regret his loss and suffer because he left for his selfish needs but if someone doesn’t want to fight for me and leaves me because he is confused in his head, he well doesn’t deserve me. Nobody deserves to be treated as a doormat.
Hello friend, I have been on UA-cam for many years now telling people how Dr Ediale get my ex back after many years of breakup 💔 it's really work I can believe am with my lover again
Contact him
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Her story was so relevant to me!! I've just been dumped after 4 yrs because he thinks we're too different people at different stages of our life :( it's so heartbreaking. :(
This is so helpful
My boyfriend broke up with me cause he wanted to be alone and single. Never saw it coming.
I feel your pain. I hope you're going better now. I'm just starting to heal now after 2 years.
@@luluah1198 just as many wives cheat on their husband these days with the wife still filing for 75% of the divorces.
Holly Mullen I’m going through this exact situation myself. My boyfriend of 12 years broke up with me to be alone and “figure things out.”
How have you been? What has your experience with moving forward been?
Some men don't want family until they reach 50. I dated someone who confessed about not wanting to marry his girl, when he was in his 30's because he was scared. So as the laws of Karma works, you break someone's heart, someone else breaks yours. The girl happily married someone else, and he lingers in regret, and 20 years later when he did become ready the girls he chose weren't ready for him.
pa! Happens all the time. The universe is fair. Similar experience happened to me. I dated a guy who, I imagined, felt I was too much bc whenever he behaved badly, I spoke up. I became too much to him. Long story short, he staged a scene to breakup. It was hurtful then. I dealt with it to accept the situation. He started to chase a gal he thought was more beautiful. Funny thing, he confessed this to me. The moment he told me, no shade, I knew the gal was never into the real him. She liked him bc of convenience. He chased the gal for months to no avail. They had the talk abt wat would happen, if she graduated then leave for a different city. He said, after he taught it thru, he was unsure she's it to keep the pursuant. They went their separate ways. During this time, gladly pulled bk, as I purged deeply into my school work. After a long time, he send me a long text, he wanted to talk to fessed up to every wrong. I was over it. I said. nvm. let bygone be bygone. He came by my rm anyways to talk, and ahhhh I was exasperated. I told him I was done. It was finiso haha. His last words to me, was "I thought you'd forgiven me." Yes. Of course bc I want to move on with my life. I've no desire to me with u. End of story is, the universe always teaches us our mistake. I'm sure he'll remember this the rest of his life. Althou, I'll forgave him to live on. Life is now peaceful. I was grateful for the experience bc he taught me alot, which prevented me from having to go thru multiple ppl, to learn one lesson at a time. I learned all in one encounter.The pain was temporary.The relief has been joyfilled :).
yaaaay😂😂😂
I might not be a dating expert, but if a guy you've been with for that long "all of a sudden" breaks up with you, he usually wants other people.
Exactly, it's not that complicated. I ended a 2 year relationship because I realize I no longer loved nor wanted to be with him anymore. One year later, I got married to someone else and have been married for 15 years. He just wasn't The One.
He's seeing someone else
ELSA BATISTA my boyfriend just did that to me. But he says he did it because our relationship started to be boring.. i don’t know what to believe or think
Not wants, fucks other people already.
Yeah ur right tho
"It's the most exciting realization one can ever have is just how much there is to do in the world and the most depressing realization anyone can have is how little time there is to do it all." -Matthew Hussey
As I'm 28 years old, that line really hit home with me... so true & I'm sure it'll continue to be a driving force for many!
Man, two years ago today, a relationship that I wanted to last my lifetime ended, and I REALLY hit rock bottom. But since then... I have learned so much about myself, moved to Asia, travelling the world, found my DREAM, moving to Korea soon, meeting amazing, beautiful people... And all that this has done is made me see the world as you have described it. The world is so so big, and there are so many things to learn and experience and so many people to meet, it's the most beautiful and exciting thing to know. Wouldn't have had things happen any other way. Worthy message to get out there :)
+Claudine Chua You're right :) The world is so big that we can find great people who make our life amazingly beautiful :)
Claudine Chua I appreciate your comment...
I’m going through the toughest time and hoping that everything happens for a reason.. I traveled few countries to get relief and I am traveling more..
God bless you
never ever be with someone that doesn't value you ..move on thats it..if a man loves you he will make it happen no matter what ..
That advice is so basic.
I hate this line no matter what . If this wud b the case then 5 percent of he real men who exist here wud b married wid their love. Many factors r involved.
@@alizasikandar9031 There is no "real" man, stop with that ridiculous idea.
Boyfriend of 1 year admitted to me that he doesn't know if he's ready to commit. In my head, I thought "what the heck were we this whole time then? Telling me you love me and making all these plans?" Because he admitted he wasn't ready, but didn't mean to break my heart (along with him knowing that he is my longest boyfriend), I looked him in the eyes as tears streamed down my face. He attempted to wipe my tears, yet I stopped him and said "If that's what you feel, then there's no reason for me to be here."
I walked to the door to leave his apartment. "You don't have to be like this, I'm sorry" he pleaded as I continued walking out. Looked back at him and told him, "I wish you the very best, and thank you for giving me this experience. I'll let you go because this is what you want and something I have to accept. One day, you will find what you're looking for. Goodbye."
Those kind of guys are simply asshole, selfish narcissist, or at least users and players too.
The hardest thing to do in life.....
Has he reached out yet?
Jade Terlaje classy!!! My heart broke with you! You left with dignity that’s for sure!
Good for you!! It hurts but it's the best to leave and never look back. He wasn't all that worried how much he hurt you, he wouldn't have treated you like that in the first place.
This video has 5 years now...I'd love to know what happened in the end. Sofia if you're here let us know!
Same
I was going to comment something similar!
Bluntly, when someone ghosts or breaks up with u, they are just not into u anymore.
Anyomore...Anymore! The hell happened to commitment and loyalty?!?
I broke up with my boyfriend and I still loved him and was attracted to him. The relationship just wasn't healthy anymore so I had to make the tough decision of breaking up. Things are not always so black and white.
You can only commit if you feel that she's worth committing to. As much as it stings - in his mind you're just not worth the loyalty. Those two things aren't gone in modern society, it's just that people are more aware of their own worth. Be happy that he broke up with you, because it indirectly tells you that he didn't think that highly of you in the first place.
coraza naoro I would like to disagree I broke it off with a guy because I hurt him once and it’s like I kept hurting him never intentionally so I felt if I wasn’t in his life I wouldn’t be able to hurt him sometimes it’s not always like that thank you
@@sophiasu9430 worst decision you could of made thats being a coward afraid of commitment you sound like my ex 😕 dead ass I feel sorry for your ex you're a coward as bitch
My boyfriend broke up with me a month ago. I've seen this video a few times already. It has really helped me not feeling lost. It was a very similar situation, it was difficult for the both of us, but I think Matthew is right whe he says "he can't realise that it is the wrong decision by staying". I think only time will tell if we should be together or apart, and right now the best thing I can do is move on and improve myself. So thank you for this video :)
Ângela Brum thank you for this comment. You are 100% correct
I wish you the very best Angela. Stay strong and have a great life
How are you right now? It's been 10 months since this comment. I wish you well
Solid thoughts.
Me as well, my ex broke up with me about a month ago, it’s been tough, it’s been hard. But this video gave me such comfort that I feel like I can breathe again. So me2 thank you for this video
My guy broke up with me about 3 weeks ago, and this is hitting home for me now. All of what he’s saying is making so much sense.
I just keep waiting for it to get easier. I miss him everyday.
I still miss my guy and it's been almost 10 months. Instead of guilting myself I allow myself to miss him for a few moments then carry on with my life. It's ok to feel aka miss someone.
I spent a year and 2 months into someone who just told me a week ago I never wanna lose you Baby girl .... to leave me alone and blocked me everywhere.
@@aprilzoe_4494 😥😥😥 so sorry. It doesn't seem like it now but you'll get through it. I found this free online thing called www.loveiscare.org you can call them for free advice and they have resources. I'm a very grown woman and I called. You're never too young or old to seek advice. Best wishes love ❤❤❤
Aprilzoe _ Wow that is exactly what happened to me. Only it wasn’t a week before but maybe like three weeks and few months before he cried because I didn’t take him back when he broke up with me and made me think he really didn’t want to lose me and then the day of the break up came and he told me hated me that he never wanted anything to do with me and it just all felt like a huge betrayal, like what happened to all those I love yous? And those I want to be with yous? And those let’s get married and have kids? When did you start hating me? Or how can you be so cruel? How do you not realize I believed you and this hurts? So many questions and you can’t get them to answer any of them. It hurts so much and I’m still grieving and I’m still hurting and I feel like I’m losing my mind. Everyone tells you to move on and in your head you are thinking of ways this could have worked out because you remember all the amazing moments you shared and how they can so easily for them just the thrown away just like that as if you don’t matter as if none of it mattered. We also dated for one year and 2 months.
Italgrl1 Same 💔
I needed to hear this. This woman is literally me right now.
Me too...
Take care and keep strong Annabel. I've been there.
Me too:")
Me 28th...
Same..
"The right person comes at the wrong time"
Holy shit *takes notes*
I think this is one of Matthew's best videos. Goes from heartbreak to everything there is to experience in the world. Really wonderful advice.
When someone dumps you, say goodbye and go live your life. Sometimes it’s just not a good time for the guy.
I agree, some women need to get over it and move on. You can see in this comment section how bitter and angry many of them are.
@@MrLoowiz I hear you! So how exactly are we supposed to move on if we are still in love with that one person? Like what do we do to get him out of our mind? Cause nothing is helping right now
@@PringleandCheese That's your issue, it has nothing to do with the guy nor does it make him a bad person. I know it's hard, I'm not undervaluing your suffering, but the point I was making is that these women tend to react to the suffering with anger and bitterness. That's just childish and malevolent.
I'm no authority on the subject, but if I may give you an advice... focus on other activities or things that you love. If you're suffering over a break up, you're probably thinking about it way more than you should, so something to take your mind off it might just do the trick. The pain won't go away overnight, it's an injury that takes time to heal, and it'll leave a scar. I also wouldn't recommend looking for a new relationship right now... people do so in spite usually to find ways to end the suffering, and they end up hurting other people and even themselves in the process. Do you have any friends you can hang out with? Try it!
@@MrLoowiz I agree with you on the fact that exes are not necessarily bad people. They are just not right for you and you are not right for them. My ex, for example was the most perfect man I have ever met and I am afraid I will never meet anybody like him. But him leaving me does not change the fact that he is the most amazing person out there and any girl who gets him is lucky af!
I have tried doing other things and it works for a while until everything comes back! Its been 8 months and I am honestly sick and tired of missing him. There's no hope of reconciliation and that hurts even more. But I guess I will get over him with time!
You see moving on from his is the most difficult thing I have had to do, so I am even afraid to fall in love again. Cause what if the same thing happens for a second time? But yeah that is my issue and I am trying to work on it.
I think the women who are talking shit about their exes (not all the women of course, maybe a few) have been abused or cheated on. That might explain their anger!
Oh and thanks a lot for the advice. I will definitely do my best to work on it!
@@PringleandCheese I suppose you won't know if you'll be able to fall in love again until you fall in love again. That's just human.
And I take no pity for malevolent women judging men. I've been through a very abusive relationship, and the only person I blame is my ex. Taking on an entire gender is just childish behavior, from women who most probably deserve to be alone for being so hateful.
But back to the topic at hand, yeah... it might happen a second time. What do we know, love is complicated, right? Good thing you're being mature about it and slowly moving on. 8 months is not that long, my abusive relationship lasted for almost 1 month (breaking up was the best thing I did, it really broke me), and I still suffer from it... that was by the end of 2015, so 4 years ago. I'm in a 2 year relationship right now, but I just can't bring myself to deeply love my girlfriend, as to commit for a relationship with marriage as a possibility. That sucks, I feel like the abuse led me to shutdown my feelings, and now I'm cold as ice. While you're fighting to get over your break up, I'm fighting to get over my trauma. I guess we're quite the opposite, even with similar issues, right? The good thing is that we're not filled with prejudice and judging other people.
I'm seeing this video in 2023 and it's been one week since my heart was shattered by my boyfriend just short of our one year anniversary. This was the first relationship for both of us since our respective divorces so we both met with some trauma and baggage. Anyway, your words were EXACTLY what I needed to hear tonight! Thank you so much for this video and for keeping it up all these years. It's very encouraging and is helping me find clarity in this fog of grief.
We make the 1 year mark in a couple weeks and he broke up with me yesterday ... did yours come back?😢
@Adel Ante He did ask for me back and said he made a terrible mistake. But I broke up with him about a month later after his behavior made it clear to me what should have been clear to me much sooner - he wasn't invested and didn't love me anymore. It's devastating regardless of who pulls the plug but acceptance comes easier this time around. He and his three kids were my top priority and I wasn't sure if I even made his top ten list. It's hard to see when your heart is aching, but you deserve better. I do too.
@@radiantrosie how long did it take for him to come back. You used no contact?
@Moog Hescock Yes, I did. It was 5 days. But in hindsight, him coming back wasn't really about him wanting me or being reinvigorated to put more effort into our relationship. And me wanting him back so badly at that time was really me not opening my eyes to what was actually going on, not acknowledging what I truly deserve from a partner, and not seeing what his actions were really communicating.
"The right person can come at the wrong time" 💔
I keep coming back to this video and as time progresses, the message evolves with it. My boyfriend of six years did the same thing a month ago where he realized wanted to be single and wanted to experience life as a single guy. I could see it wasn't a easy decision for him so I set him free and respected his choice (also, same: close to thirty, unsure about life, career,...). That was the hardest thing I've ever done... especially since I get to see him thrive from afar. Of course I'm happy to see him thrive (and I know he's thriving because of the hardship of his decision... it's as if he HAS to thrive or else he will have decided all this for nothing) but I'm barely coping on my end. I'm going my very best to grieve and rebuild my life but I'm still stuck nursing the hole he left in my life. So I'm back watching this video. Thanks for the words. They always help.
Iku Tree how has things been going for you? Hope you're doing well and it works both for you two
Thank you so much for your kind words. They warm my heart! Can't believe how long it's been!
Are you okay right now?
Hi girl, i'm going through the same thing right now. How are you doing?
I hope things are better for you now
You are never bound to anyone who leaves. Let them go. Mourn and move on.
The fact that this woman saw a man she loved be vulnerable and cry in front of her and still want to be with him, speaks volumes about her and the work she’s done ✅
Ive seen that and still wanted the man but when it came down to it he couldn't even look me in the face and say what was going on . When we had the TALK he was talking to someone that came back into his life and wanted to see what happens and was reserved for her. Then he says he wants to be friends and he still "cares" about me . You cannot be friends with your ex . He made his choice and it wasn't me .
What kind of people are you surrounded with, to write comment like this
@@antygona-iq8ew agree. wtf? that should be a standard loving thing to be vulnerable and hold space and bring people closer. i can't with the likes on this comment, so weird. the fuck is a relationship to people?
My ex who's also my bestfriend decided that we should take time off from each other.
I am still devastated but trying to be better.
When someone tells you that they want their freedom but they care for you, it is one of those moments in your life where you question your worth as a person. Am I not enough?
Out of all the videos I have seen, this one helped me understand the other person. And I feel it is best to also empathize with them because they are hurting too.
I don't think that the best way to get over is to forget them totally since they have been a great part of you life. But rather just focus on yourself this time and realize that there are other good things waiting ahead of you.
My ex left us sunday and still comes over everyday to see he's son and to eat with us. Idk he said he dont know if he wants to be with me. . I'm honestly depressed everyday just calling or texting him cause I miss him . And 😢 idk how to begin to pick up thr pieces I asked him If he is ever coming back he said he dont know . He said he's not happy with me.
Seriously, I think he has met someone else and he feels guilty about it because he now realizes he is crushing someone who loves him. That is why he's crying. He'll get over it pretty quickly. Would love to know how this turned out.
This was really heavy to take in still, after my last breakup about 10 months back. What Matthew mentioned was very true. The grieving felt like ages and the depression stage was worse than I had imagine. But all it takes is a moment of realization to get yourself out of the black hole. No one can help, but yourself.
I'm slowly getting back out there, though getting through Christmas and NYE was a little difficult.
To everyone who is going through this, don't give up!! There are so many better ones out there, life is full of amazing surprises at the most unexpected moments. Good luck :)
Thank you
Thank you! I've been through a break up that has taken me at least 4yrs to get over. I say "at least" because I still deal w/my issues about it. It's sad, because I haven't talked to him in that long, yet his memory still haunts me. He dumped me for reasons unbeknownst to me, and I was absolutely in love w/him & absolutely thought he was "The One". It is hard. I don't know if you'll ever fully recover from someone like that, but it's good to be in a place now (4yrs later) where I'm starting to feel the pieces coming back together & the constant depression lifting. Thanks for your encouraging words...
How is it going, two years down the road?
Im ready
hello dear, do you need any help? I can help you, it worked for me .., let's talk better💕💕💕
Everything he said was 100% true. I got broken up with out of the blue a few weeks ago. This guy just decided within a day that he didn’t want to be in a relationship. And we broke up and I took it as a slap in the face to get my shit together. Now I know what I want to do after school. We don’t talk and I don’t want to talk to someone whose chosen to get rid of me. It still hurts n I overthink things everyday but when he said “it’s not your battle” that really helped me think clearly about what I’m overthinking
Did he come back crawling?
This guy had a gift. He has a gift of understanding or trying to understand where someone is coming from and to help others to understand themselves more because if it.
Pro tip: WE ALL WORK A LOT
💯
Yes!
And we all want to travel and experience different things in life 💯
Facts
Yes. The crying and comforting him as he dumps you.
"He wasn't excited about the relationship anymore after 2.5 years." Buddy, how do you think people who have been married 25 YEARS manage?
Exactly. People need to stop thinking it's all rainbows and butterflies. No. It's really hard work! The honeymoon phase only lasts so long and then, it takes work to make it last! You get out of it what you put into it, though. If you both work at making it wonderful, it will be wonderful. If you don't, then it won't! It's not hard!!
I watched when reflecting on being the person who broke the relationship and as the one getting dumped. Matthew speaks the truth so eloquently from all levels. It's comforting.
You CAN build a great life for yourself. There are so many rich experiences to be had in this world. :-)
Tbh, when someone breaks up because ‘I’m too busy to spare you time’ or ‘you deserve better’, take them at their word. You really DO deserve better than them because those phrases are what cowards use when they’re bored of the relationship they’re in and have no moral courage to state the truth- that they’re being callous with your feelings and selfish for their own.
“It’s not your battle to fight” 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I really needed to hear this.
My brother died and I went to his house for love and support. He didn't want me there or have to "manage" my emotions. He kicked me out, called an hour later and said our relationship is broken and ended it. 17 months and I was nothing to him.
😭
This is EXACTLY what happened to me but after a six year relationship and a one year engagement. He broke up with me six months before our wedding because he was dealing with the same struggles; confusion, career, etc. I can't tell you Matthew, how much I needed to hear these things because this has been undoubtedly the hardest thing I have ever gone through. Thank you so much for the amazing, honest and unbiased advice!
Did he come back ?
Hes NOT CONFUSED he knew this all before didn't think about her feelings just used her till something better comes along
This is currently my life. And everything you're talking about is happening to me. I took this advice to heart and I'm keeping it in mind. Thank you for these perfect words
Except we're 21 and have been together for 5 years. And he is feelings all those ways.
SAME AS ME TOO SO SAD
Sarahhhyasmin how are you now?
I'm also 21 and in the same boat. He's lost and confused and bawled when he broke up with me. Word for word. This video has helped me so much
I'm 22 and we've been together for 5 years too... and it's not easy to throw it all away.
This gives me so much reassurance on my ex who left me seven months ago. It feels like you’re talking to me directly. Thank you Matthew. Sobbing so many tears because it’s only hitting me now that I’m allowing myself to grieve. Thank you for this incredible video Matthew. You’re helping so many people alone in their rooms.
Matt, that women is now feeling better about herself. Thankyou for healing a part of her. You can hear it in her voice- hope; not for this relationship but for herself in the future.
The more you battle with it, the more it goes away. Let him go, he'll come sooner or later. No matter after how many days, or months he'll come back, she would be already enjoying her life. Just don't waste your time meanwhile :)
Rim Bouayad Best comment
How this make sense? If that guy loves her, he would want her in his life, despite all the hardships. The fact is, he only thinks about his ambitions, his needs, his work, himself.
Love is strong, but not always as strong as the will to live life to the fullest. Especially for men, because they have, objectively, a more rational mind (which isn't always a good thing, by the way) when it comes to love. It's not binary. Maybe he loved you unbelievably much, but he still didn't love you enough to give you the rest of his life. And by the way, as rational as humans are, psychology can be bent out of shape. Maybe he THINKS his priorities are there, but they aren't when he actually looks at the grass on the other side, and notices that, in fact, he was already standing on the greenest grass when he was committed to you.
I agree with you
Guys are so weird. Even if they have everything with a girl, they'll still pull fast ones like this...
Kassandra Kairo
Because they are sluts and always want another woman if they feel they can get more.
I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Sure, a man can still love you and break up not because he doesn't but because he needs to focus on himself. It's especially difficult to be in a relationship when your man isn't assured of himself, and in return can ultimately damage the relationship you two have as a whole. it's not selfish, it's being rational and I believe we, women, should respect men for that particular reason, and vice versa.
I remember me watching this video again and again crying after crying after my ex broke up with me. Now 5 years later when I watch this again, I don’t feel any pain. Pain will go away eventually once you realize that it’s not worth it to worn your heart out just for someone who has chosen to leave you behind. There are millions of people and things waiting to be met and seen..life is not just about romantic relationships. It’s not wise to let a man or a woman to take over your life.
My guy left me after 7 years of relationship saying that he dosen’t love me anymore. I am in a lot of pain. I am 30 and wanted to start a family but instead of standing upto my expectations.. he left. It was out of the blue. He just left. My life was all about him. He never prioritised me and left me like i am nothing.
You are worth everything
@@glizta42 Thank You!! Somedays it is difficult to tell that to yourself as you are filled with self doubt, confusion and you are hurting so much. Thanks for the assurance.
Update?
I’m in the same situation right now. Turning 31. 7,5 years toghether. One year married. He tells me the spark is gone. He wants to be alone. He wants to put his career first. He suddenly doesn’t want to have kids. I’m just devastated. He took away my best years.
@@angelikachylagirl, same here. 1 week after our 6 year anniversary he said the rs is not working and he needs to find himself and develop. Literally everyone I tell his break up reasons to, is puzzled like 'wait, that's it?'. Oh and wanna know what finding himself has looked like? Partying, picking up smoking again, whoring around, quitting vegetarianism. He was so smart and ambitious. He has a Master's in computer science ffs. When he was with me he wabted to buy a house in the woods asap and he enjoyed reading on the sofa Staurday morning. Now he crawls out of pubs at 2 am 😂
I was devastated when a man I deeply care for said that he no longer feels like we should be in a relationship. He maintained that even though he is still attracted to me and loves me, now is the time when he should be dating around. I felt absolutely crushed and worthless for a long time. But seeing your answer to Sophia's question really shed light on this difficult situation. Nothing I do can change his mind because as you said, "it's not my battle to fight." All I can now is let him go to pursue his happiness while I prioritize mine. Thank you Matthew!
Hey Matthew..I need to share u that my boyfriend had just broke up with me 1week ago..The reason behind this is my past relationship with different man before him.but what I say to him is that I haven't cheat him..It is like i was in relation before him.so i know I haven't done anything wrong..plz help me ..I love him and wanna him back ..Help me plz what should I do to make a healthy relation again.
I love what he says "now imagine what the world has to offer. How little time there is to do it all. He is saying to create connections with others." He is so positive, caring and empathic.
My boyfriend said the same exact thing . Been dating for 7 years and out of the blue dumped. It’s great to hear from a male perspective. I would constantly ask him to try and explain why this is happening because no one breaks up over a silly thing, but this makes much more sense. 🙏
I’m the same way right now. You’re not alone. ❤️
*#*I PRAY THE UNIVERSE GRANT YOUR HEARD DESIRES WITH MORE LOVE AND COMMITMENT FROM YOUR EX THROUGH THE GREAT MAN OF THE UNIVERSE DR WILSON, WHO HELPED ME RESTORED MY BROKEN HOME. HE CAN MAKE YOUR EX BEG FOR A SECOND CHANCE*#*
*#*Wh'|sapp him for help*#*?¿¿¿??????????????????????????
➕12086496208⏯⏯⏯?????????????????????????!!!!?!!$$$$$$$$$$???????
➕12086496208⏯⏯⏯?????????????????????????!!!!?!!$$$$$$$$$$???????
Thank you so much Sophia for asking the question. I'm in the exact same boat right now (his reason was due to career fulfillment). I have been looking for in depth "closure" because i too couldn't understand why when everything was going so well... Thank you so much Matthew for telling me that it just wasn't hard on the receiving end. I knew he was hurt as well but I didn't understand that it hurts just as bad to make that sacrifice. Thank you for encouraging us that there are billions of other opportunities for happiness. You made it so sincere. I loved your response. Never take this video down. I need to listen to this everyday till I can heal.
We are in the same boat Rita **hugs**
I am in the same situation too. It happened yesterday and the wound is fresh. And it hurts. It hurts.
1xXxIceGirlxXx1 It's been two months so far for me and I wanted to let you know, it gets better. Life is great. Like he says, there's millions of people and opportunities to experience great things with others. Enjoy life and love yourself. Keep yourself occupied and surround yourself with positive distractions. Do you. The right person will come into your life when it's meant to happen. It's in the stars.
Rita thank you for your words. i guess i really need a time machine to skip this whole process, living it day by day is just torturous, anyway, im glad you're doing better and i hope you meet someone who is sure of himself and sure of what he wants, such men still exist.
Im going through this right nowandit hurts so bad and i just keep hoping that he'll want a relationship with me again in maybe 6 months or a month or something....maybe
Whenever I watch his videos, it makes me imagine a double cheese burger telling a starving person that's its ok to be hungry and there are so many food out there...
Ujjaini Mukherjee that’s so fucking funny xD
This is totally my situation. My ex broke up with me the second day he turned 30, before that we were together for 4 and half years and engaged since this March and bought a house together. The reason he told me is exactly what Matt said. I cried so much when I am watching this.
+Bei Yang I feel you me too here same detail with the girl that called.
Oh, I really hope you and I will get better and better
+Suin Moon Thank you. We will. There is a beautiful life in front of us 😊. I have been doing a lot of fun things and pick up some new hobbies. Hopefully things work out for you too.
Bei Yang I hope youre okay by now :)
Update please!
Thank you so much Matthew. This video popped up on my profile the right time. My boyfriend broke up with me a few days ago, and for me, it came out of nowhere. But for him? He was thinking about where the relationship was going for about a month. He said that at this point in our relationship that he feels as though we should be in love with each other, and he doesn’t feel that he’s in love with me. I loved him, but I never told him “I love you” because I felt as though the timing wasn’t right anytime I came close to saying it. We’d been dating for 6 months, and I came close to telling him “I love you” several times but I didn’t because I was afraid he wouldn’t feel the same way. My intuition was right. I was right.
This video and advice was really helpful, and I’ll be coming back to it again as I continue to grieve and heal.
Did you get over it? I’m very much in the sane situation. Even made the mistake of calling him after the breakup to tell him in case he would take me back… but he didn’t care. I don’t know how to let it go. I did the most to show him I cared…
I cannot tell you how much Sophia's situation resonated with me. Been there girl but Matt's advice was SPOT ON. A year after my boyfriend broke up with me, I can tell everyone that is going through this that life goes on! This break up was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through but it has also been the biggest learning experience of my life. Sure I still love him and I probably always will but I also have discovered a love for many other things, including myself. Keep up the great work Matt!
Yes !!!! Absolutely right ! Put down the wine and get out and meet people . Nobody is worth crying about if they chose to walk away . And hanging on to what was is futile . It was ...... and that’s in the past . Dry your tears and open your eyes x
She wasnt crying maria fuck off her life you done too much
I love how he is not judging anyone (different from many comments here...). He is just dissecting. Thats talent
Well yeah, not many people are able to do what he is doing... he is great...really great❤❤ his words made me feel comfortable.
This video is from 9 years ago and it’s still a powerful video of advice. 14:17 where he says ‘you’ve spent your time wisely’ was the best thing I needed to hear today. Thank you.
Sometimes people on the receiving end of this situation (being dumped) need to be reminded that there are plenty of partners who insist on keeping their significant other around while they are fighting and working so hard through their careers, etc. because they truly value that special someone knowing, sharing and growing together with them through that part of their inevitable success, though failures may happen too. If a man/(person) really values both his career and his woman, he will keep her by his side, not kick her out of his life. Work as some kind of excuse is just a convenient cop-out. He is taking advantage of her love & kindness in that he's counting on the likelihood that she will do and agree to anything for him to keep him happy, even if it means having to let let him go. He's also selfishly counting on the fact that she will eventually get better/over him, so that way he can walk away maintaining a cleaner sense of conscience. If your significant other does tries to tell you this story, you must do the same to them: kick them out of your life, politely of course, but firmly and swiftly!
I wish there was some kind of an update from all those people that called Matthew.. you know just to see how did things work out for them ..
I second this! I'm fairly curious how the callers are doing, esp. those whose situations are similar to mine.
It's always the same person :) you can tell by the voice...
What does the LACK of such follow up tell you?
All she has to do is not contact him and in time, he'll be back, Nuff said.
Rock N your all over these break up vids like me man ! Lol you should start making some and your own channel. You got some really good advice bro. Real talk.
Chris Sanchez Thanks, yeah I watch a lot of video's on break ups and relationship advice to see if I had done the right things in the past or were some things I could have done better. In 2012 I was going through a painful break up and that's when I heard there was an actual term called "No Contact" in which I had followed for years already just out of my own instincts and sometimes it worked in getting them to call me back and if it didn't, then oh well, I found out I wasn't that big of a deal to them and I moved on. Just recently I had another break up and I went No Contact but not to get her back, but to just back away and let each day take care of itself and see what happens and be happy with it either way. I've also been with girls when their ex boyfriend was calling their phone like crazy and it just looked so weak and pathetic of those guys to do that, so I've known first hand what girls go through when they deal with an ex and I vowed I wouldn't be like all those other guys that couldn't let go and they got somewhat of a surprise when I did but yeah, all these video's really help give some good basic solid advice and there's no magic to getting someone back, they either love you or they don't , so No Contact should be applied in a way that the person knows it's not always to get someone back but to value yourself enough to not chase someone who clearly doesn't want you and show them they made the wrong move in dumping you. Thanks.
Rock N bro, I have been praying more than I have ever prayed before in my life. I've ask God to heal my heart and make sense of all the bad. Your doing great man because the steps of a good man are ordered by the lord. I have got to believe that all this happened the way it was supposed to. Not even god can make people come to him or love him it's all free will and on the terms of the individual. I don't mean to sound biblical or like a holy roller but bro the time I've spent asking for healing and guidance seem to be helping. Look up "td jakes nothing just happens". Take care bud.
Chris Sanchez I'm a Christian also and I believe in prayer and I think God has his due date for all of us to receive whatever blessings we get in life. Patience is the key and it's tough when your going through hard times. I'll have to look up that video, thanks and you take care also.
Rock N true, i went through the same thing, not only is he back but i finally get the value i deserve
this really helped me. there's millions of him in world and there's no need to waste my life with thinking about someone who doesn't wanna be with me %100. i still feel an unimaginable pain bt at the same time i feel a little relieved. i will use the time i sacrificed for him to make new hobbies and concentrate on myself.
It might be important for the lady to also know that even if he doesn’t realise he’s made a mistake by leaving her, it doesn’t mean it wasn’t one. He’s putting himself in a place where he can, and probably will, forget about her, regardless of how good the relationship was or could be. That’s the unfortunate thing about this situation. You might throw away a good thing without ever realising it.
Going through a breakup and this video popped into my feed. I didn't know what to expect but I'm so shaken up by it. Sophia's breakup story is nearly exactly like mine that just happened several weeks ago. So thankful I came across this because it reaffirmed some of my feelings about the breakup and also shed some new light on the situation. Amazing advice, thank you.
Thank you for this video😢 here I am 5am crying in my bed because I miss him so much. .. and idk if he misses me. This video gave me a little bit of strength that I needed to know that I NEED TO LET GO.
I'm only a day after break up. I've just watched this video and it made me calmer. Thank you Matthew. Thank you so much!
Am in that right now am so emotional...... Did you manage
@@Dee_Njagi yes, I did :) After a month I felt relief, few weeks later I realized that he wasn't a good person for me. And he never would even I know he's not a bad person after all. Meanwhile the pandemic situation occurred, which only confirmed what I knew so far and that is I couldn't count on him in crisis. I can surely say that, if he asked me today or next week/month/year, if I want to come back to him I would say "no, I'm good the way I am right now :)"
@@magorzatamichalik3935 wow that's great dear... Go go girl. As for me am in a dilemma.... He confessed his mistake and wants me to remain.He says he's sure he can't find the same true love I gave him and he wants a second chance, the truth is that deep down I love him but am still hurt so it's hard for me to decide
@@Dee_Njagi it's hard to advise you anything. I wouldn't be 100% sure if he want to come back because of you or because he couldn't find someone better. I bet Matthew knows how to make that kind of dilemma easier ;). But jokes aside: I can only tell you from my perspective which is if I'm not sure of his intentions I would at least give myself time for me and rethink if this is gonna be good for me.
@@magorzatamichalik3935 yeah dear that's what have exactly done....am trying to take everything easy and examine how everything flows.
Dated my Ex for 13 years (since I was 16) and he broke up with me a year ago (2017) Thing is he seems happy while I was devastated. Almost a year later he came back to tell me he made a mistake but at the time I had already accepted the breakup. And was feeling good about myself. I still think about him and I’ll admit I still miss him but it was his loss. I want a family and marriage so if in 13 years he didn’t want to marry me then i doubt it will ever happen at least with me. I guess I wasn’t the one.
B R thank you for sharing sounds the same as what I am going thru now
Sounds like he wasn't the one~
@@Free2LoveDorks i was about to write these words one by one haha
Never go back. So many narcissistic men out there playing the field and trying to have their cake and eat it too.
@@christineherrmann205 evil is real its best to love yourself first and always have your guard up always and lookout for you ,really i couldn't agree with you more, the amount of evil narcissistic men and women out there is crazy and in this case men in relationships they always put themselves first and what seems like cute romantic gestures and so on are mostly just them fulfilling their needs before they pick a date to leave i know there are good men out there but its hard to come by them & why hold your breath live and love yourself am not saying give up on love true love that is but that's not all there is in this life and its always wise to observe someone's behavior and their words before you show any interest in them believe me the words they speak reflect who they are and how they behave too of course its different when they speak a bunch of bull. but you know what they say is true "real eyes realize real lies" just love yourself and don't get played and if you do move on and never look back "go on with your bad self"😘🎉👏💖😎🙌😜
It shouldn’t be hard, if its hard its not meant to be its that simple. No matter the circumstances if someone loves you they will make it work, not because they feel obligated but just because they love you
Man, I normally don't comment on your videos, but all I could do was nod and agree to EVERYTHING you were saying. The only thing the couple can do is just do the thing and go through the process while hoping for the best. That's all anyone can do with anything in life, especially something as difficult as this. I sincerely wish the best for those two.
Let them go. Do not hold anyone back because it’ll only hurt you in the long run. If, you are meant to be it will be. Do yourself a favor and heal things do get better and more clearer when you heal from this. I promise.
I've never even been in a relationship, but my goodness, this is some of the best advice I've ever listened to about relationships.
It's 2.40 am.. but was totally unable to fall asleep.. this was exactly the piece of advice I wanted to have.. so comforting! If u r 'grieving' there can't be more of a 'move on' message this agreeable.. watch it.. and it's no waste of time
All these horrible stories that I read in the comment section make me depressed. Don't know if I want to be in love, why go through so much pain!
jennifer b. I guess it’s like a drug. As soon as you know how high you can be when you’re in love, you want that feeling again. Even though there’s also going to be a lot of pain.
@@sahraa857 that pain is not worth it
You can't live in a bubble. Choose the best guy, he could die. It happens.
first, love and accept yourself, and everything else will come much easier.
It’s not love that does the damage, it’s the lack of love that hurts.
Yo this is fucking amazing. I'm the guy that Matthew is talking about. I legit cried breaking up with my girl after 3 and a half years and every reason he listed was the reason why, incredible. I loved her so much
Did you regret it?
@pn7134 I'm so glad you commented. No! I don't regret it, and I say this with my ex taking to me weekly since we broke up. She's a great person so we're still friends (no benefiting) and I can say I learned so much more about myself being single. I know so much more of why me and her would never work out even though she's still a great person we're just not compatible, and there's nothing wrong with that. She needs a guy who's less sensitive than I am and I need a girl who is more sensitive and emotional. We would literally fight about this in our relationship because I wasn't getting my niece met or she felt I was being overbearing, and then in turn she wouldn't get her needs met. So instead of forcing somebody to be something that they're not, I had to break up with her to go find the person that is just naturally more compatible with me. And as long as I was honest with her about why I was breaking up with her there was nothing wrong but it still hurt like fucking hell. But now that I'm over the hurt know I would have been making a bad decision marrying her. It would have been settling for the rest of my life
I went through the exact same thing she is going through...and I’m still going through it. This is exactly what I needed. I’m slowly realizing that some people need to grow apart to grow together again..or even realizing that that person wasn’t the right one at all. I’m only 20, and I have so much more life to live. Thank you so much for this video.
I'm really in tears watching this cuz I'm experiencing the same thing, my boyfriend dumped me so easily. And being ignored and avoided was the most hurtful and painful things that he's been doing. 😭
Going through a break up currently. This video is something that I needed to watch and hear. It's been so hard and my depression is not making things easier. He is right the world is a big place and there is so much more to life than being hung up on a guy. Time to create a great life and experience life to its fullest. There are great guys out there and who knows perhaps I will meet a guy that can be better than the one I lost.
Girls, truly speaking... if ever you happen to be in this sort of situation wherein you wonder if your man thinks about you or not, please please please... LEAVE HIM!!!! Don't waste your time and energy watching these kinda videos, as they won't solve any problem. In fact, it'll give false hopes, and it YOU, Yes YOU.. who'll be suffering and not a guy. So, take my advice, and just focus all your time and energy on your self and those who are worthy of your love, instead of men who make you feel worthless!
But that was literally his advice?
Coping up the break up:
1.Grieve
2.Build yourself
3. Be objective...evaluate
4. Take it slow,relax wisely.
5. Live your life with or without the guy...build new connections ♥
I am liking this coach.lol
#real,authentic & relevant
I also feel that if he feels like this then clearly he feels something is missing and she should not wait around for him. She should build her life without him. Look after you're needs and heart. I feel you can never say the wrong thing to the right person.. In time she might well feel it was the right thing for her too.
Hes a jerk I would never ever use someone like this if you don't want to settle down Dont instead of hurting someone nice
My bf broke up with me 3 days ago after almost a year together. It’s been incredibly hard. Like a piece of my heart is still with him all the time. Especially because he was my first love. I miss him each second of the day. But I do feel this sense of empowerment because I know how much I’m worth and most importantly I know I did everything I could - I put in 110% into making it work. So now it’s out of my hands. I hope I can move on and grow from this, learn from this and become an even better version of myself in the process. ✨
Hope is never lost provided you're still breathing; I will love to recommend to you the same man from Africa that helps me get my ex back
Get in touch with him on what's app +2348159158915✅✅✅✅✅🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Girl I’m in the same place you once were. We can work together to get better. It’ll be alright one day.
Hope you feel better by now. I am at your shoes right now and I know that feeling when every pieces of you were just broken and shattered.
@@evi88 Update: it’s been over a year and I feel like I’ve grown so much more as a person because of the breakup. Like they say; time really does heal all wounds. I can only be grateful for my past relationship because it helped me grow into a better woman. I am at a much much better place and just overall happy and excited about life. Hang in there! Things will all be alright. As difficult and painful as it is - you will make it through to much happier days and learn to love yourself that much more because of this. 🙏🏻❤️
I recently got broken up with last week. After a 2 1/2 year relationship we were high school sweethearts. Meet very young at 17 and fell so deeply in love. God i loved that man and always will. I showed him what real love was. This is the hardest pain i’ve ever had to go through. He didn’t have the same feelings for me anymore which was hard to believe. But i think we met at a wrong time in life. He won’t ever find someone who loved him more than i did. If it’s meant to be it’ll come back.