Why I Left the Christian Church

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  • Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
  • This week on The Broski Report, Fearless Leader Brittany Broski unveils her recent Call Of Duty Cosplayer discoveries, discusses “Preacher’s Daughter” by Ethel Cain, and discets organized religion.
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    SONGS OF THE WEEK:
    “Sun Bleached Flies” by Ethel Cain
    “Family Tree” by Ethel Cain
    “American Teenager” by Ethel Cain
    “Ptolemaea” by Ethel Cain
    “Gibson Girl” by Ethel Cain

КОМЕНТАРІ • 6 тис.

  • @rainbowjackson9475
    @rainbowjackson9475 Рік тому +10638

    IM DYING imagining people only listening to the first 15 minutes of this video then reading the comments like “thank you for this episode❤” 😭😭

    • @egonzalez920
      @egonzalez920 11 місяців тому +11

      🙈🙈🙉🙉lol

    • @kaciedurso
      @kaciedurso 11 місяців тому +10

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @alifishies
      @alifishies 10 місяців тому +59

      You know youve hit a new low when you stalk someone to find their costplayer crush. They literally follow eachother, and she has liked his photos since september. He also has a twitter and patreon with 18+ content. I had to

    • @pissloud
      @pissloud 9 місяців тому +12

      ​@@alifishiesomg don't be shy beastie who is it

    • @alifishies
      @alifishies 9 місяців тому +27

      @pissloud royaidni 🫣. I'm sorry Brittney

  • @emmyhensley7104
    @emmyhensley7104 Рік тому +8261

    Listening to this cleaning my room.
    “Religious trauma is the pain of your family choosing god over you”
    And now I’m violently sobbing

    • @daisybirch8818
      @daisybirch8818 Рік тому +45

      ow crying

    • @monetorr8498
      @monetorr8498 Рік тому +115

      Me too girl, i'll never understand because I could never choose religion over my child/family.

    • @FuzzyBSMcgee
      @FuzzyBSMcgee Рік тому +3

      Big yikes

    • @ritaholmes1638
      @ritaholmes1638 Рік тому +10

      I hope everybody took some time to recover from the trauma, if recovery is still ongoing, keep pushing !! Do what you can with what you have (easier said than done I know)

    • @heydiddlediddlethecatandth5251
      @heydiddlediddlethecatandth5251 Рік тому +15

      trying to breathe this was like a punch in the gut

  • @mthsxo
    @mthsxo Рік тому +25335

    only brittany can talk about a ghost cosplayer showing his wiener online, and 30 minutes later talk about how religion scared her for life. i love it

  • @Akristinaaa
    @Akristinaaa 9 місяців тому +2994

    Everytime I hear "I envy the faithful" I burst into tears. I do. I used to have that blissful ignorance. I used to have the closeness and shared beliefs with my family. But after the age of 12 that all started changing, and now, at 22, it's completely gone, and it IS incredibly isolating. Brittany makes me feel less alone.

    • @pepperpattynaise
      @pepperpattynaise 7 місяців тому +71

      Ive heard people changing their mind about religion at 12 yeara old SO MANY TIMES I dont think it means anything, but its so curious to me. I stopped believeing in God altogether at 12, and a couple of friends had the same experience, a few strangers too. Makes me think: whats going on at 12 thar made us break?

    • @ButtercupsEvilTwin8877
      @ButtercupsEvilTwin8877 7 місяців тому +18

      Girl same, I’m almost 23 in a couple weeks which is making me spiral about a lot of things. Including struggling with my faith and if I should get back into it or not

    • @Akristinaaa
      @Akristinaaa 7 місяців тому

      @@ButtercupsEvilTwin8877@ButtercupsEvilTwin8877 Hey man, I'm right there with you. At least we're not alone 🤍

    • @colekayve
      @colekayve 7 місяців тому +67

      @@pepperpattynaise I think it's cause of puberty ngl. Religion tends to be weird when it comes to "losing your innocence" through your body and your desires Naturally developing. I think we break away as a literal survival tactic cause it's fuckin painful to hate yourself for your body, mind, desires and urges that aren't hurting anybody. For me? I realized I was bi at 12 and I realized that at least in this part of my life, it's either I choose to try and understand my newfound attraction to other boys or I hate myself for life. 12 is truly when you start seeing how you don't fit in that system anymore. And I hate that I feel guilty about it today at 19 years old

    • @joy7222
      @joy7222 7 місяців тому +15

      wow same for me i was twelve and now I’m 21 and I have given up on re-believing. I think I have stopped trying because I know it’s not meant for me and I am no longer ashamed of it. It is isolating at first but in a way it is liberating also

  • @AngelGenovese
    @AngelGenovese Рік тому +4260

    “I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” “I don’t understand this disconnect of why do I have to convince you to care”
    Thank you Brittany.

    • @HeyoitsJay
      @HeyoitsJay 11 місяців тому +44

      Basically sums up my Christian experience in a nutshell.

  • @thaShoelace
    @thaShoelace Рік тому +3489

    I felt so much meaning behind the statement “I forgave God”. I haven’t resonated with a sentence like this since “I toowk it to my penthouse and I fweaked it”

  • @maxkjrside8802
    @maxkjrside8802 Рік тому +6049

    I am so happy that she keeps us updated on the Cosplaying Call Of Duty lore

  • @g_kuno
    @g_kuno 5 місяців тому +1112

    "And I forgave God."
    I feel some some people dont know how HARD this line is

    • @Jamhael1
      @Jamhael1 3 місяці тому +64

      My problem is not god, but the PEOPLE who claim to speak in the name of god...

    • @Eiji_Kirishima
      @Eiji_Kirishima 3 місяці тому +8

      @@Jamhael1THIS I love this comment section it really feels like we all just collectively GET IT ❤️

    • @Jamhael1
      @Jamhael1 3 місяці тому +19

      @@Eiji_Kirishima next time, when a family member ask you "why you do not want to return to church and us?", answer them this:
      "I cannot, because how can I trust people so ARROGANT to the point of claiming 'I know what god think'?"

    • @Eiji_Kirishima
      @Eiji_Kirishima 3 місяці тому +4

      @@Jamhael1 Writing this down right now 🙏🗒️✍️

    • @kaylinrosauraaa2456
      @kaylinrosauraaa2456 3 місяці тому +5

      @@Jamhael1makes sense but remember you can’t hate God because of a misrepresentation other people give of him. Mankind is not the author of our faith so bad behavior has nothing to do with the truth of Christianity .

  • @mckennabusse8510
    @mckennabusse8510 Рік тому +3352

    "i can't explain basic human empathy to you" !!! girl you found the words to explain how so many of us feel after leaving the church. UGH THANK U FOR THIS EPISODE ILY

    • @immavirgo5668
      @immavirgo5668 Рік тому +11

      Girl same ❤

    • @seriously_fucked_in_the_head
      @seriously_fucked_in_the_head Рік тому +13

      FR I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO PUT IT

    • @thecosmicradiation
      @thecosmicradiation Рік тому +24

      There's a good quote out there from author Lauren Morrill, when talking about affordable healthcare in the US, which says "I don't know how to explain to you why you should care about other people."

    • @maudiemouse
      @maudiemouse 11 місяців тому +10

      god i felt this SO HARD. my fam always finds these little digs, ways to press my buttons, but i never do that back for the fear of creating a giant argument. just not worth it to me.

    • @miggs7173
      @miggs7173 11 місяців тому +5

      @@GivebackthescarfI’d genuinely like to have an honest convo with you. Your perspective fascinates me. My parents are/were Christians but I could never say they were religious. I developed a relationship with God when I was 11 from the Bible Study at my school. And everything I did then for 6 years was for my personal relationship with God. However, the older I got, and the more I read the Bible, I realised it wasn’t for me. I didn’t want to pick and choose parts of the Bible that worked with my morals and beliefs and ignore the rest. Besides, does it not say God doesn’t want a lukewarm believer, or the whole “if you don’t forsake your mother and father for the cross, you can’t follow Jesus.” I feel scriptures like those clearly indicate the Lord wants a FULL believer and I can never be that. So I respect it but it’s not for me. I do have days where I hear a beautiful worship song and wonder maybe I can be Christian again, but I’m very convinced it will lead me back here where I am, aware that the path is narrow.

  • @meganw3220
    @meganw3220 Рік тому +2530

    hands off the wheel, eyes closed, petal to the metal, in the opposite lane, drunk, sleeping, unbuckled, texting, playing cod, screaming, and ready to listen

    • @melcarol3313
      @melcarol3313 Рік тому +44

      No but for real u get it

    • @sammie_commie5155
      @sammie_commie5155 Рік тому +26

      Sammmmeeeeeee can’t wait to listen to this while swerving in all lanes

    • @bulletprty
      @bulletprty Рік тому +1

      YESSSSS

    • @rj-sn7rq
      @rj-sn7rq Рік тому +1

      Gay nb pk tapping in😂

    • @tearsfordears
      @tearsfordears Рік тому +21

      Smoking my vape, sniffing smelling salts, seat pushed all the way back

  • @amysheeter877
    @amysheeter877 4 місяці тому +201

    I'm a Christian, and this was so well said and so respectful. I went through a lot of the same trauma that you talked about here and I understand being angry and having to unlearn and being estranged from your family. You didn't have to be respectful when talking about your hurt, but you were and that's why I love you. Thank you for who you are.

    • @EvangelineMaggard
      @EvangelineMaggard 2 години тому

      i wholeheartedly agree. i was born into a christian missionary family and was “saved” at four years old (??) and i fell away from God from age 16-30 and it was ONLY through love that i returned. that was four years ago and my faith is now stronger than it’s ever been. i resonated with so much if not all of what she said about her experience with religious trauma especially as it relates to family and cried along with her. brittany broski you are a damn treasure, girl.

  • @stephanieyglesias7893
    @stephanieyglesias7893 Рік тому +2492

    Brittany is so eloquent, man. The way she can make my side hurt from laughing one second and then have me BAWLING the next is actually a mystery to me. She’s better than like 99% of podcasters or talk show hosts

    • @puumpkenn
      @puumpkenn Рік тому +22

      This is what makes us girls etc

    • @vicious_toad
      @vicious_toad Рік тому

      yeah, the way she describes that peen

    • @bluecola9673
      @bluecola9673 Рік тому +13

      SO eloquent and intelligent !!!!

  • @TaeNeeP
    @TaeNeeP Рік тому +1917

    Brittany being absolutely FERAL 5 minutes in has done more for me today than my coffee ever could

    • @Carollovessws
      @Carollovessws Рік тому +16

      this so so true lmfaoo

    • @emmamills02
      @emmamills02 Рік тому +6

      So real

    • @beachgwen
      @beachgwen Рік тому +7

      Well put, absolutely

    • @Slimshadybbyy
      @Slimshadybbyy Рік тому +12

      Truly MADE my morning. Me leaving the gym just hysterically laughing 😂

    • @rebahart1323
      @rebahart1323 Рік тому +6

      I’m literally laughing out loud in the middle of the gym this is insane hahahaha

  • @thomascampbell350
    @thomascampbell350 3 місяці тому +137

    I still remember when I was a kid, a little girl was standing next to me by the alter and she said “they like it when you raise your hands” and we both raised our hands together and my parents came and hugged me

  • @pazz
    @pazz Рік тому +3869

    I came here from a tik tok, it was a clip from this episode of you talking about your strained relationship with your religious family.
    So, when you began this episode with "I've got so much on my heart, I've got to put these words to camera", the LAST thing I was expecting was a story about a Ghost cosplayer going hog out on Twitter.

    • @DrickaArouche
      @DrickaArouche Рік тому +22

      Same

    • @ginatyra8451
      @ginatyra8451 10 місяців тому +4

      😂😂😂😂

    • @glosiahrye
      @glosiahrye 10 місяців тому +12

      HOG OUT LMAO

    • @misskuni
      @misskuni 8 місяців тому +5

      Hog out

    • @dwell7315
      @dwell7315 8 місяців тому +23

      this was my FIRST episode of Broski Report, from a clip compilation including bits from the back half of this episode, about religion. So yeah same experience, she went "I have so much on my heart" and I went "oh wow she's serious" then she hit me with the "I have a favorite Call of Duty cosplayer" and I said "Now where is this going?"

  • @clairebradley4906
    @clairebradley4906 Рік тому +873

    “I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” WAS CRAZYYYY. I was never able to put it into words.

    • @Evehjm
      @Evehjm Рік тому +13

      Crazy dude!! Brittany gets it. This is why she’s our leader.

  • @yah2966
    @yah2966 Рік тому +2875

    as a lesbian who went to a christian church growing up, even though my parents weren’t very religious, just simply BEING in the church, feeling that horrible sensation like you don’t belong, like you’ve done something terribly wrong that you just can’t help, it’s horrible. The church never felt like a place of love to me, and i always wish it did. It always made me feel like a monster, like i didn’t belong at all. that hurts a lot

    • @dentchii2947
      @dentchii2947 Рік тому +114

      im also a lesbian and i felt the same way when i would talk to my friends at church and they would say stuff like "if you ever said you were gay i would leave you because its against my religion" and i couldn't believe she left me when i came out to her after being so close for like three years because she cared more about her religion then our friendship and it makes me feel guilty as well just for being who i am

    • @yah2966
      @yah2966 Рік тому +50

      @@dentchii2947 exactly!! first of all I’m so sorry that happened to you, but it happens unfortunately so often. People have treated me differently or left me for just the way I love and their opinions on it. it makes you feel like you have to keep such a natural part of yourself hidden :(

    • @kidchannon
      @kidchannon Рік тому +1

      @@dentchii2947why would u be shocked when she literally told u what was gonna happen 💀😭

    • @Allovesya
      @Allovesya Рік тому +74

      @@kidchannonit’s shocking to actually know that someone you love and considered a friend would leave because of who you are..?

    • @yah2966
      @yah2966 Рік тому +25

      @@Allovesya yeah like as if it’s not still surprising when someone choses their religion over their relationships,,,

  • @Rasamama_
    @Rasamama_ 9 місяців тому +467

    The fact that this started with hog talk and then left me crying because of how much fire she’s spitting is insane. I love Brittany SO MUCH

  • @ariel0el
    @ariel0el Рік тому +818

    All jokes aside, I’ve never really felt like I had religious trauma until now. “It feels like they chose god over you” has me me crying like a little baby rn. That hit so deep.

    • @spitdealer2668
      @spitdealer2668 Рік тому +20

      I feel you that line hit so deep. I was raised JW and one of their teachings is that you should always choose Jehovah over anyone else even yourself and it still really fucks with my mind whenever I think about it 😢

    • @castortwonetwo3258
      @castortwonetwo3258 Рік тому +1

      Omg same😭❤️❤️

    • @ariel0el
      @ariel0el Рік тому +8

      @@spitdealer2668 yes! It’s such a toxic mindset when you realize everyone we should be putting first is here on Earth, in the flesh. I love Brit sm
      for opening her platform so we can have these discussions and find comfort in knowing we’re not alone. I hope you’re able to heal past everything, friend

    • @mossyrain
      @mossyrain Рік тому +6

      It sucks because as a kid I would always have the thought in the back of my mind that the people I love that didn’t love Jesus were going to hell. Fucked me up.

    • @mossyrain
      @mossyrain Рік тому +3

      And when I figured out I was attracted to girls too all I could think about was the fact that now maybe I’m going to go to hell and my parents never denied that

  • @NostalgiaCringe
    @NostalgiaCringe Рік тому +1298

    “That was stripped of me, at my own hands” this ex-Mormon over here is SOBBING. Thank you for including such vulnerable and wise insights about your own experience. So much love.

    • @CrocLundee22
      @CrocLundee22 Рік тому +11

      Fellow ex Mormon here! You should listen to the song Untitled by Rachael Jenkins she is also ex Mormon and that’s one of her songs about ✨religious trauma✨

    • @madisonb3308
      @madisonb3308 Рік тому +12

      ex mormon who also cried listening to this. fuck I love brittnany.

    • @Asom13
      @Asom13 Рік тому

      same here!!@@madisonb3308

    • @micahhowald8448
      @micahhowald8448 Рік тому +6

      Same here. Dad was bishop and I was forced to come out when I was 17. Bullied at church and school. Dad does not talk to me and I always blame myself for hurting my family by being gay and go back and forth from hating and trying to love myself.

    • @claireemery4131
      @claireemery4131 Рік тому +3

      @@micahhowald8448 Also a (current however progressive) mormon. Coming out to mormon parents is the hardest thing I've ever done and they absolutely did not accept any part of me that identifies as queer. It's hard learning to love the parts of you that the church condemns as a sin. We can't blame ourselves for for being queer and our families being hurt by that.

  • @aridan9023
    @aridan9023 Рік тому +1441

    Listening to preachers daughter is like watching midsommar. It’s such an incredible piece of art but it is so deeply disturbing. It’s sticks to you like hot wax.

    • @esseverytime
      @esseverytime Рік тому +17

      this explained it to the T!!!!

    • @aphrog649
      @aphrog649 11 місяців тому +25

      “it sticks to you like hot wax” !!!!

  • @meifennellysieu7510
    @meifennellysieu7510 6 місяців тому +374

    Christian here. No idea if anyone will see this (much less Brittany), but what has been brought up throughout this video is so incredibly valuable.
    35:53 in particular really, really struck me. That's what I think Christianity should be. It's also the only thing I can absolutely agree with within the Church right now. Jesus wasn't somebody that railed against marginalized communities; those were the people he spent the most time with and stood up for. He professed the love and selflessness Brittany mentioned. He directly challenged the wealthy, the powerful, and the performative, and called out hyprocrisy as he saw it. That was Jesus. A man that sacrificed everything to demonstrate love for others, and who DIRECTLY called out a lot of religious and social issues.
    There is a lot of that religious hypocrisy within American Christianity, and the cultural constructs we choose to see "outsiders" through. She is so, so right on so many fundamental issues within the Church. Many of us have truly become what Jesus referred to the Pharisees as: a den of vipers, and performers. Gatekeepers of faith and love as things to be used as rewards, and not to be given generously. We do not love as we should, and we don't demonstrate what Jesus demonstrated. Even the "choosing God over family and friends." There's a huge difference between disagreement on religious and spiritual values, and holding it over those that disagree.
    Anyway, Brittany... I'm really proud you brought all this up. Thank you for standing up for worthwhile topics like these. You're awesome.

    • @literallyjustsomegirl
      @literallyjustsomegirl 2 місяці тому +1

      me, 5 minutes in: yes. *nods vigorously*

    • @leitmotif7268
      @leitmotif7268 2 місяці тому +7

      It’s refreshing to see a Christian who can speak up and acknowledge the worst parts of your community instead of hearing criticism and taking it personally like “akshully not all Christians…”

  • @grayscaletestimony3724
    @grayscaletestimony3724 Рік тому +7851

    HANDS OFF THE WHEEL EYES CLOSED BAYBEEEEEE

  • @emi_g1024
    @emi_g1024 11 місяців тому +1849

    This made me cry. I am so grateful to my mom for pulling our family out of the church when my sister and I were young, despite her catholic upbringing. She said one day the priest just kept going ON about women being sinful and all the things they shouldn’t do, and she looked down at us two little girls and decided that’s not the kind of beliefs she wanted us to be around. I can only imagine how different it could have been for us.

    • @boobloom1016
      @boobloom1016 11 місяців тому +59

      I'm thankful she pulled you and your sister out too. That is not a real Spirit led church. You're mother was wise for realising that those are not the teachings or love of Christ. I pray that you all hold a revelation of the real depth and love God has for you all.
      Romans 8:1 - "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,"

    • @nomoretwitterhandles
      @nomoretwitterhandles 11 місяців тому +58

      Bless your mother. I'm so glad you were all able to escape what could've been a very traumatizing life for all of you. People always ask me why I don't go to Church if I believe in God, so I ask them why the Church is discriminatory when God is not. They never have a good response to that. Always be wary of organized religion.

    • @thetwistinside2857
      @thetwistinside2857 11 місяців тому +25

      ​@@nomoretwitterhandles They would be hardpressed to have to admit to themselves that churches are formed and led by humans and not usually our best ones.

    • @EGGWISHING
      @EGGWISHING 10 місяців тому +5

      I wish my parents were like this

    • @karaleigh_eva
      @karaleigh_eva 10 місяців тому +8

      I think about that so much -- how different things would have been. My father was a pastor and wound up in prison for the things he did (and justified doing with the bible). And if he hadn't forcibly been taken out of our lives when we were little, we'd still be there. I think frequently about what that "alternate timeline" girl who was raised in the church would have been like

  • @PhantomMothball
    @PhantomMothball 10 місяців тому +169

    "You're creating the problem and you are the sole person who can fix it" 29:52 . That *PUNCHED* me in the gut. I was born and raised in a cult and I still feel that to this day. There's like, a nagging in my head telling me that I need to repent, I need to go back, I'm doing so much sin, it feels like its impossible to escape...
    But I know there's nothing wrong with how I'm living. I'm not hurting anyone, and this joy I've only gotten to feel outside of it is worth every struggle.

    • @sam_bernstein_
      @sam_bernstein_ 5 місяців тому +2

      i hope youre doing well friend ❤ you are doing great

    • @PhantomMothball
      @PhantomMothball 5 місяців тому +2

      @sam_bernstein_ thank you

    • @crazythefirst
      @crazythefirst 4 місяці тому +2

      im 14 and my church isnt a cult but i still have that nagging voice in my head always saying that im not enough, that im sinning, and that i need to go back too. you explained it perfectly. i hope ur doing good you got this!

  • @kelseyryan206
    @kelseyryan206 Рік тому +1320

    The cult of southern Christianity is so incredibly hard to explain unless you have experienced it. You did a better job than I’ve ever been able to. Leaving the church is so isolating. “I forgave god” gave me chills. Hats off to you for working to leave behind the resentment you feel. You’re not alone, I’m working on it too. Hard to not resent an institution and it’s followers that hate me and all the people I love.

    • @razrv3lc
      @razrv3lc Рік тому +50

      And how it boils down to loving real people that exist over a god that nobody can even prove exists. That’s what’s so painful about it. Knowing that my family chooses to love the equivalent of an imaginary friend over real people is sobering, and that they’re doing it exclusively out of fear of being punished by that entity. It’s like it creates a rage towards god for doing that to our families.

    • @margomagoo2836
      @margomagoo2836 Рік тому +3

      Grew up mormon and definitely feel this!

    • @madisynanker8255
      @madisynanker8255 Рік тому +1

      SO REAL

    • @rileygunn911
      @rileygunn911 Рік тому

      @@margomagoo2836me too!!! so weird.

    • @yeet1066
      @yeet1066 Місяць тому

      Yeah I can't explain it well but as someone who was raised in a mostly catholic country that's not the US (Ireland, literally all the decent schools are catholic too) even the most religious people here I've talked too can all agree that there's a certain brand of insanity that comes with American Christians, literally half the shit that goes on over there wouldn't fly here at all.

  • @ClowningAround22
    @ClowningAround22 Рік тому +1411

    As an ex-catholic who started to realize the problems within the church at a young age and who started to cause household issues bc of it, you already KNOW my hand are OFF the wheel and my eyes are CLOSED and I am LISTENING

    • @catherineobrien6003
      @catherineobrien6003 Рік тому +10

      You get it

    • @Maddy1998
      @Maddy1998 Рік тому +1

      real.

    • @boyfriendsfavdj
      @boyfriendsfavdj Рік тому +2

      ME FR

    • @2blessd2b_stressed
      @2blessd2b_stressed Рік тому

      Catholics are the fakest a “Christian” can get. They don’t even follow the 10 commandments and ironically have in fact changed some of them🤡 not only that but they’ve taken many books out of the Bible, totally not sus💀 I don’t suggest throwing Christianity away completely, seek the full truth, God just wants to love you he doesn’t want you to come to mass for hours or pray to statues or whatever they do lmao, he just wants you to form a personal relationship with him, Jesus is God in full form, he is the father son and spirit we accept into our life’s, this is factual tho the Catholic Church will never acknowledge it, read Isaiah 9:7- this verse is the Old Testament prophecy of Jesus birth and to no surprise it calls him both a son, father, and our prince of peace (the spirit) and if that doesn’t do it for ya it also boldly says he will be called GOD. Jesus went back to heaven with his body to reign in full form until his return. Son was metaphorical for his human form. don’t let the evil Catholic Church fool you and turn you off from Jesus completely. Seek him. I suggest looking for a Pentecostal apostolic church, they have the full truth baptize in Jesus name, speak in tongues (heavenly language given by God which is real I experience it too) you will never experience a peace and joy like this I promise, No disrespect but catholics do not have the joy of the lord, true joy. Anyone can say they are happy and content but it doesn’t compare to the fountain of living water Jesus gives daily.

    • @TwizzleTown
      @TwizzleTown Рік тому +2

      So patriotic

  • @katielibby15
    @katielibby15 Рік тому +676

    “I hated everyone that made me feel like I wasn’t doing things right, even though inside I was happy.” Hit me so hard, tears were immediately in my eyes. I had to go no contact with my parents and middle brother, and it’s changed/ruined relationships with other family member because they don’t get it. The intense judgement is hard to swallow. Powerful. I love listening to this woman talk.

  • @margaretcooper9009
    @margaretcooper9009 11 місяців тому +87

    “Gnawing at the iron bars of my enclosure” is my new saying of the month

  • @atlastheghost7012
    @atlastheghost7012 Рік тому +614

    As a straight white male from Texas, I agree with everything Brittany is saying, and it's so critical that we all fight the good fight for equality and equity. I love that she uses her platform for so much good. Trans rights are human rights!! Love you Brittany! I also grew up the same way religiously and have so much deeply rooted trauma religiously and it was so healing to hear someone share the same experience.

    • @Jeremy-wp4yh
      @Jeremy-wp4yh Рік тому +1

      So if you're fighting for trans rights. Who's fighting for women's rights? Or should we erase female bathrooms, prisons, sports, scholarships, safe houses and shelters?

    • @alexiscake_
      @alexiscake_ Рік тому +39

      its so refreshing to have someone like you in the broski nation 🫶

    • @kylebrainpresents
      @kylebrainpresents Рік тому

      Just scrolled down from her saying "I need dick" but yeah mood

    • @atlastheghost7012
      @atlastheghost7012 Рік тому +30

      @@alexiscake_ as stated in the town hall meeting, we're on the front lines! 😂😂❤️

    • @alexiscake_
      @alexiscake_ Рік тому

      @@atlastheghost7012 🥹🥹🫶🫶

  • @mckennalee4954
    @mckennalee4954 Рік тому +683

    Fellow black sheep liberal of the family and wow you have really put into words what I always struggle to. The complete lack of empathy for their fellow man whilst screaming about how strong their faith is is so incredibly hypocritical and frustrating. It’s impossible to explain to these people because their level of cognitive dissonance is so high. Thanks for giving a voice to this phenomenon because I think so many more of us are experiencing it than talk about it.

    • @lizsun261
      @lizsun261 Рік тому +19

      exactly!! it pisses me off to no end how they preach empathy but just do not understand empathy for those who arent the exact same as them.

    • @SidKnee380
      @SidKnee380 6 місяців тому

      I have been periodically ranting about this for years. They say they love their neighbor. But if that neighbor is homeless, trans, gay, POC, an immigrant or fat then they deserved whatever tragedy befell them, or aren't deserving of basic respect. They always speak so negatively about people different from them. If they are the righteous, I will gladly go to hell.

    • @omilet6658
      @omilet6658 6 місяців тому

      well said

  • @fluxusjpg
    @fluxusjpg 11 місяців тому +1170

    omg the experience of your family “poking the bear” under the guise of just wanting to “learn” when really they just want an argument and another chance to try and prove you wrong is SO REAL. it drives me fuckin NUTS and then IM the bitch when i walk away from certain conversations in the name of protecting myself and keeping the peace. why do i have to be the bigger person when im 20+ years younger than the people antagonizing me?

    • @screencec
      @screencec 8 місяців тому +19

      i hear you!!!!!

    • @sammyofthevalley
      @sammyofthevalley 7 місяців тому +17

      LITERALLY and hearing this makes me feel better because i feel so guilty about not trying to change their vote to make them less damaging to human rights but it’s exactly “how can i teach you about human empathy”

    • @theangryambisextress
      @theangryambisextress 5 місяців тому

      me too! public enemy #1 here. i tried for YEARS. i let them be the bad guy, i was nice, i was nasty, i listened, i tried, i sent links, i watched things, i approached it every way you can imagine and no one fucking cares. my uncle tried to spill my fiancé’s bud light last summer (siiiiiiigh) and said fuck you to my face when i asked if he could please stop obsessing over dylan mulvaney minding her business and let us enjoy my father’s birthday dinner. my fiancé physically removed me to safety…at which point my father followed to yell at me for making a scene. i never thought id get married in a church but i always thought my family would be there. i’m bisexual. my fiancé is black. if you cannot comprehend that we and other people are full fucking human beings you have NO PLACE whatsoever in OUR family’s lives. and they instigate every time, blame me, and will continue to blame and resent people for *checks notes* understanding/caring more about human rights than they do and trying to gently ask why they dont. it’s fucking bullshit. r/qanoncasualties is a great resource but it kills me that so many of us are living this right now

    • @emmelinesprig489
      @emmelinesprig489 5 місяців тому +8

      “ why do i have to be the bigger person when im 20+ years younger than the people antagonizing me? “ DANNGGG that cuts right to the core.

    • @StevieMcKenna10
      @StevieMcKenna10 5 місяців тому +3

      Omfg my grandma would do this shit with my mom and I was so blind. One instance was when she, in front of everyone in Church said I wanted to be baptized when I never said anything. I would have to go to Christian, Pentecostal, and a Catholic Church when my parents were separated and it's so incredibly frustrating hearing so many different things and feeling like no matter what I do it's something wrong. And every excuse of hers was "bc God" basically. We dont talk to her anymore lmao

  • @solstice.
    @solstice. 3 місяці тому +26

    What hit so hard in this was the fact that as a child how grew up in Christianity, I felt that same validation that Brittany mentioned that you seeked for. Including faking it. I just wanted to feel the same great thing that I saw people felt around me. Including the evidence of it like crying, falling to your knees, passing out, and talking in tongues. Since I was young I wanted that too since kids my age would feel it. And I was so confused why I wouldn’t feel it so I’d fake it. Hearing that I wasn’t the only one hit me so hard that im tearing up now writing this.

  • @skipperbee
    @skipperbee Рік тому +275

    As an ex-christian. I got every word you said. The community aspect of religion is incredible, but for what. It’s all a guise. I’ve never felt so alone than in a church with other people.

  • @CrownedYeti
    @CrownedYeti Рік тому +318

    Brittany being self-aware of how feral she's becoming for men online is so relatable, thank you for speaking up for us thirsty gwrls

  • @twylaslavin5046
    @twylaslavin5046 10 місяців тому +31

    I left the church after my first miscarriage. Preachers, family, friends all they could say was “we don’t understand God’s plan” “it’s just gods plan” gods plan was to take my baby? I couldn’t accept that. Along with everything else of course. And I spent so long hating the religion and hating god. I’ve finally after years of resentment come to peace with it all. I’ve come to peace with being out of the religion and my family continuing to accept “gods plan”. Thank you for this Brittany. It’s tough to be in the south as an atheist/agnostic.

    • @Taletree92
      @Taletree92 17 днів тому

      Sorry that happened to you, and that people said such unintentionally hurtful things to you then. As someone who was raised atheist, ppl thinking I would find more comfort if I stopped believing there's horrible accidents and unfortunate circumstances, and instead believe that there was a god out there putting me through it, has always been mindboggling to me.

  • @anniebakes12
    @anniebakes12 Рік тому +903

    “Crying, sobbing, imitating caged monkeys, yearning for COD cosplay ween.” “That was unexpected”
    Girl, we expect it every time. And I love it.

  • @nelleicrain
    @nelleicrain Рік тому +220

    “I envy the faithful. I do.” CHILLS 😭 I loved church and the community when I was younger but now I can’t be apart of something where a majority is so hateful and ignorant. I wish i could believe it something that much but I just can’t

  • @jobahhh
    @jobahhh Рік тому +192

    as a trans man who left the church of god as soon as i left tennessee, i was brought to tears by how vulnerable and personal you got this episode. keep it moving, brittany, you always bring me light when i need it most.

  • @c0smiccowpoke
    @c0smiccowpoke 11 місяців тому +147

    Brittany, thank you so much for sharing this. I left the Evangelical Christian church four years ago and it has been the most confusing, tumultuous, isolating years of my life. My family is also still very religious and routinely informs me I will be "spending an eternity in hell."
    That sense of feeling like you're always living wrong is so real and so easily fucks with your head. I feel less alone when I hear experiences like yours. It's incredibly comforting to know I'm not alone, yet I'm sorry you've also had to endure the pain that comes with leaving your religious upbringing behind.
    You speak with such eloquence and clarity. It 's hard to do that knowing family members are watching from afar. Thank you for showing up authentically and doing it with fervor. You inspire me to do the same.
    Much love

    • @angrytaco23
      @angrytaco23 8 місяців тому +3

      I feel you, we got this 💛

    • @pinkcockroach
      @pinkcockroach 7 місяців тому

      pray for me (idk if that sounds ironic) because my family recently entered the evangelist church and this is TOUGH lmao

    • @amoodyb
      @amoodyb 7 місяців тому

      @@pinkcockroachomg how’s it going?

    • @pinkcockroach
      @pinkcockroach 7 місяців тому +1

      @@amoodyb they're hunting me because I never show up in church anymore and I've cut my hair short (it's unacceptable to them and it's symbolic to me), im busy with work now and also with rinsing myself off of the seemingly innate shame and guilt I feel all the time so I can look at people in the eyes and not see a reflection of a distorted image i see in the mirror. basically, it's been good.

    • @amoodyb
      @amoodyb 7 місяців тому +1

      @@pinkcockroach it can be so stressful when getting away from the faith and all that. I’m currently going through some stuff that has to do with that. So I feel ya. Man, it’s stressful.

  • @kay_nanika
    @kay_nanika Рік тому +291

    As an ex -christian and trans woman, Preachers Daughter is such a visceral and hauntingly real depiction of what sort of isolation organized religion can bring over you. How quickly I lost my family after coming out was horrible, and the feeling of walking around as the 'black sheep' of the family for being different, and there opposition to your existence and the existence and thriving of others as some sort of political stance is so draining. Learning Ethel was trans as well, the lyrics to the intro song are so powerful and resonate a lot with personally. 😢

    • @forgetmenotfaery
      @forgetmenotfaery Рік тому +4

      I lost family after coming out as trans too :(

    • @solariya
      @solariya Рік тому

      i hope all of you find peace and happiness im sorry that happened to u
      @@forgetmenotfaery

    • @soupy_soup2
      @soupy_soup2 Рік тому

      It’s so stupid that people feel like they can just disagree with the existence of queer and trans people. Our existence was not political until they made it political.

  • @emmyrae127
    @emmyrae127 Рік тому +228

    “I forgave God.” Straight up fully body chills. The power and energy radiating off her this episode is aaaabsolutely making me sob/ cheer like a feral banshee.

    • @mary-st7ut
      @mary-st7ut Рік тому +3

      Couldn’t have said it better myself

  • @jswizzler
    @jswizzler Рік тому +128

    I’ve been thinking about Sylvia Plath’s quote “I need a father, I need a mother, I need some older, wiser being to cry to. I talk to God but the sky is empty.” I feel like Britney just gets it, losing your faith and being closed off from your family and friends because of it is such a difficult thing to go through. I was raised in a christian school, and anytime you questioned anything you were put down, I read the bible front to back so many times and that truly made me see the faults of the church and the religion itself. seeing myself lose everyone in the final years, solely for caring for those we were taught to shun and hate, was a heartbreak that I never imagined.

  • @Yobydobie
    @Yobydobie 7 місяців тому +15

    It’s so funny the ad just before this video was for Mark Wahlburgs Christian Hallow prayer app. I’m listening to this on the depressing drive home from saying goodbye for what will probably be the last time to my sweet, precious great grandmother. There’s just something about hearing Brittany froth at the mouth over Ghost cosplayer hog that’s so comforting rn. It’s what Mema would have wanted. Thank you Brittany.

  • @kyleexwhy
    @kyleexwhy 11 місяців тому +532

    This was THE most dynamic episode far and thats saying something 😭😭😭
    Going feral -> crying about religious trauma -> going feral was WILD i love her sm 😭😭

  • @kayashley81
    @kayashley81 Рік тому +550

    As a pastors daughter now agnostic/atheist, I am VERY excited for this episode girl 🎉

    • @caleboop1814
      @caleboop1814 Рік тому +23

      children of pastors attendance, present and traumatized !

    • @oogaboogass
      @oogaboogass Рік тому +8

      Your father is a pastor...damn 😭 good wishes and hugs to you fr

    • @LazieeeMeee
      @LazieeeMeee Рік тому +7

      pastors kids are present and sat 😇

    • @kayashley81
      @kayashley81 Рік тому +20

      can i hear some NOISEEEE for our parents believing we’re burning for eternity for the sheer fact that we don’t declare jesus as our lord & saviour!!!!!! 🎉🎉

    • @christinaa7469
      @christinaa7469 Рік тому +5

      Souther Baptist ministers kid here 🫡 reformed and ready

  • @nina.k666
    @nina.k666 Рік тому +190

    Brittany, I genuinely don't know if you'll see this gurl but I am writing this from the other side of the Earth, formerly engulfed within an equally toxic Abrahamic religion, and I am re-learning, trying to re-wire my brain, and although we lived such different lives, your experience resonates with me on a different level. I don't know you, but I love you. And I am so proud of you and of me and of all the women alike. And yes, I also did cry during Barbie. We are of two different languages, different religions, different histories and ethnicities; yet the misogyny and religious trauma we lived through unites us. Blessed be the feminine love. 💋 ILY babe.

  • @emma-eo2dc
    @emma-eo2dc 11 місяців тому +12

    i literally had to pause the video so i could go on a rant while you were talking abt religion. i left the church fairly recently and it’s so so hard and so isolating. hearing someone talk abt things that i could barely put into words is so healing and validating during such an uncertain time in my life and watching someone have a so similarly raw reaction to their past religion is so familiar to me and is so relieving to see as i’ve hard similar, intense reactions when i think about it. this video was so healing and i’m so glad you put this on the internet

  • @lizturley9542
    @lizturley9542 11 місяців тому +505

    i grew up mormon and this episode hit so hard. brittany is so eloquent, she perfectly encapsulates what it’s like to grow up christian and feeling the weight of religious trauma !!

    • @fluffyattackify
      @fluffyattackify 11 місяців тому +30

      Me too dude, growing up Mormon it takes years to deconstruct that shit

    • @h.r.9563
      @h.r.9563 11 місяців тому +5

      How to you know someone is exmormon? Don't worry they'll tell you. Jkjk I'm here too!!! We're everywhere bitches!!!!!

    • @nordicpandi
      @nordicpandi 10 місяців тому

      mormonism is full of misogyny, covert abuse, and belittling women.

    • @lottie227
      @lottie227 7 місяців тому +2

      @@h.r.9563literally. Omfg growing up Mormon was rough

    • @arianamazzagatti391
      @arianamazzagatti391 6 місяців тому +3

      Yes 👏
      We share a very special religious trauma bond 😅😭

  • @sarahb3245
    @sarahb3245 Рік тому +193

    As an ex-southern Christian I’m so grateful and happy to listen to another person’s experience of religion and how it traumatized them. Religion isolates you from the outside world as a tactic to keep you from learning other ideologies, but seeing Brittany talk about the exact same trauma helps me not feel so alone. Thank you queen 😍😍

  • @Pumajupes
    @Pumajupes 5 місяців тому +8

    My mother stayed in their room for about a decade because they were afraid of the rapture. Everything was symbolized as evil or unholy. When I came out to my mother as gay, she she would say and still to this day, “ it’s not my place to tell you how to live your life. God told me to love you regardless.”

  • @ameliahcarpenter1741
    @ameliahcarpenter1741 Рік тому +117

    Girl I was raised Pentecostal and you hit it dead on the nail. If you didn’t speak in tongues you weren’t “filled with the Holy Ghost” I tried so hard to be “filled” and just gave up and started speaking gibberish and the way I got so much more respect afterwards was so isolating because I knew I lied.

    • @genZer420
      @genZer420 Рік тому +14

      grew up in a Pentecostal church and i never had the feeling to raise my hands durring worship or speak in tongues, and i was waiting for that moment that i would feel the “holy spirit” in that way, i used to lift my hands occasionally but that “holy spirit” feeling really never came

    • @lisakornick
      @lisakornick Рік тому +1

      I had a similar experience with faking speaking tongues in my youth group. Then later told my mom that I did it thinking I’d also get praise from her (which I craved so badly) since she was also very religious and she flipped out on me and said I’m going to hell for speaking in tongues so the confusion i felt from being told by two different sides what is right and wrong was so confusing when I was just trying to feel something

  • @gon2340
    @gon2340 Рік тому +123

    The emotional rollercoaster. From cosplay hog to humanity and religion. As a queer person it pains me to see this culture war play out in front of me under the guise of morality via religion. Thank you Brittany.

  • @jacixbabyy
    @jacixbabyy Рік тому +145

    As a preachers daughter, I know your pain and grief. I am about to be 33 and I'm still working through things in therapy that I learned when I was young. It feels validating to know I'm not alone ❤

  • @itsautumnbreeze
    @itsautumnbreeze Рік тому +275

    My eyes are closed and Jesus has FULLY taken the wheel. As someone who is the liberal, progressive black sheep of her family in a rural Catholic upbringing, it's been a journey to really develop a healthy, beautiful relationship with faith that's independent from the religious structures I was baptized into... Thank you always, girl, for being vulnerable and real and honest. Giving you virtual hugs. The Broski nation comments are a manifestation space, so putting it into the universe now that you will get that good Ghost hog. Loving you, Brittany!

  • @hannahleversee3900
    @hannahleversee3900 Рік тому +103

    this was a very awakening episode for me. you spoke things i couldn’t put words to and now i feel like that weight is gone. “i can’t explain basic human empathy to you”
    this is my fave podcast

  • @carsono.schnelz9543
    @carsono.schnelz9543 4 місяці тому +7

    i’m super late but just a tidbit about the track “hard times”- it’s not only about ethel feeling the pressure of her father’s faith and status as a preacher after his death, but also her ongoing trauma from her experiencing CSA from him in her young childhood :( the lines “in the corner on my birthday you watched me/ dancing right there in the grass/ i was too young to notice/ that some types of love can be bad” and “nine going on eighteen, lay it on me” and the repetition of “please, can i sleep?” in the outro are especially tied to this. i believe she even ties both of these ideas back in “american teenager” when she says “and i feel you there/ in the middle of the night when the lights go out/ but im all alone out here” and these little details make me fucking insane about this album 🤗💔
    i love your interpretation of the feeling that you can’t get away from the guilt of christianity long after you leave the church tho!! i’ve never thought about that aspect of it before.

    • @gooodmorning4526
      @gooodmorning4526 3 місяці тому +1

      Btw for anyone who doesn't know, she said its not actually based on her own experience of SA as a child or anything, it's the character's. Just so no one gets confused.

  • @ssm2001
    @ssm2001 Рік тому +312

    as a Christian, I fully understand what you are saying, and I completely agree. I had to unlearn the things I learned as a kid and form my own relationship with God. I love the spiritual connection, but I also value loving people that a majority of Christians condemn. it's heartbreaking how bastardized and dehumanizing religion has been throughout history, and how harmful religion has been to so many people.

    • @ucsdgirl159
      @ucsdgirl159 Рік тому +6

      How were you able to form a new relationship? I has since "disengaged" from the pentecostal faith I was raised with, but I think I still seek some form of a relatioship...just not with the God I was raised with.

    • @ssm2001
      @ssm2001 Рік тому +25

      @ucsdgirl159 I think the first step is separating what you have been taught from God, because religion or person that says God doesn't love everyone is lying. I think I had to learn that, and then find a church that taught that and nurtured it. I was fortunate that the pastor happens to be my dad, but I also know that the spiritual relationship is much more important than the human aspect of religion. then, I found things that helped encourage that relationship, certainl gospel music and reading the Bible myself helped a lot

    • @isabellaf4199
      @isabellaf4199 Рік тому +2

      @@ssm2001 Same here my father and grandfather are the pastors, I was recently let down by him and have not been fulfilled in the church I was raised with bc there's not much community especially since there's no one my age so I am looking for a different congregation.

    • @brooketracy1735
      @brooketracy1735 Рік тому +1

      YES 🎉

    • @ssm2001
      @ssm2001 Рік тому +17

      @isabellaf4199 yea I think the most important thing to remember is that everything wrong with the church comes from the people in the church and the spiritual connection is way more important than any congregation

  • @lingweenie
    @lingweenie Рік тому +166

    brittany casually started talking about music again after spilling the realest and most emotional speech as if it were an art with such emotion and passion

  • @CrownedYeti
    @CrownedYeti Рік тому +157

    I appreciate Brittany for being so honest and vulnerable with us. I hope she knows how beautiful, compassionate and wise her outlook on life is. Her following her true beliefs and being critical about what was taught is amazing, she's amazing.

  • @gingerfaerie
    @gingerfaerie 5 місяців тому +5

    I seen my grandpa yesterday . Every conversation I am put on the spot. I get asked if I believe I am saved every single time I see him .but that doesn’t really matter , since he speaks to me as if I’m not every time I talk to him. For years and years the main thing on my mind -I wish I had the courage to ask , why ? What is it about me that makes you think I’m not ? I’ve talked to god , I’ve lost sleep over the thought of going to hell . As a child I was traumatized at the thought of not being “saved” l. I’ve never heard god speak to me , show me a sign or anything in that nature. I have tried. I don’t have a normal family that I can just have a conversation with without feeling guilty or shamed. I can’t have normal conversations with them , them tell me about their childhood stories , how they got married etc.As a child in Sunday school we were brought to the graveyard , we were blamed for not converting people while they were alive and were told it is our fault if those said people went to hell. Things like that you just don’t forget. I strive to be nothing like those people. I always always had doubts in my head about whether it is factual or mythical even as a young child . I had social issues so a lot of the time I didn’t go to “Sunday school” I sat being parents and heard the worst of it . I’m open to anything when it comes to religion but at this moment I do not believe and I have a huge resentment towards my family and parents for pushing this on me.

  • @L1vRosie
    @L1vRosie Рік тому +105

    “People didn’t choose you, they chose god over you.” OMG BRITNEY I AM CRYING BC ITS SO TRUE

  • @katharsis5601
    @katharsis5601 Рік тому +120

    I'm currently healing my inner teenager by finally allowing myself to crush on fictional characters, so you being so unapologetic about it is really reassuring and therapeutic

    • @toriburges7096
      @toriburges7096 6 місяців тому

      Same here! I'm so glad you are on the road to healing. Ugh, this was so cathartic.

  • @darkangel4994
    @darkangel4994 Рік тому +95

    as someone who was raised religiously and who feels like the “black sheep” of the family, this video was so healing. i really and truly appreciate when brittany talks about genuine, serious things like religious trauma because it makes me feel less alone. thanks madam president❤

  • @leemeyers5335
    @leemeyers5335 8 місяців тому +10

    40:00 I think it's really, really powerful you went through this. I was raised with an agnostic mother and an atheist father and I never had to grieve what happened to me after I died or that I was somehow living wrong in the eyes of God. Not really, anyway. As someone that has seen Christians lose their faith and adopt a different world view in their 20s, the fear and the grief is real. To come out of it on the other side with love in your heart is a fucking challenge and triumph and I don't think that should be understated. I felt jealous of others' faith and the positive side of church, (the community, the sharing of emotion). It does contain really beautiful things. Thank you so much for sharing that. I bet a lot of people feel close to you in what you've been through too. There's still magic in the world, in art, in music, and in being human. I find my spiritual side coming through there too.

  • @leapfrogkate
    @leapfrogkate Рік тому +163

    i relate heavily to faking spiritual experiences in the name of holding onto connections with others. the more you spoke- about family poking fun at you, about the hypocrisy of the individualistic nature of american christians- the more i cried. thank you for putting everything i’ve felt into words. i’ve never heard my inner feelings so well laid out in language. thank you thank you thank you.

    • @kattlady08
      @kattlady08 11 місяців тому +5

      Yes!! I pretended too. Now I look back and see how crazy that was. All for the pastor's grandson. I was head over heels for that boy. 😅😂

  • @beccataylor2589
    @beccataylor2589 Рік тому +92

    It’s really hard to fight with your family about basic human rights but it’s somehow even more sad when you just have to give up the fight for your own sanity. And the relationship is never the same, and they feel it but don’t care

  • @OtaconAmiibo
    @OtaconAmiibo Рік тому +73

    I was baptized twice and saved four times at friend’s churches where people didn’t know me, and each and every time I assumed I wasn’t doing something right because I never felt “It.” Still haven’t, and now I know that’s okay. Thanks for being so open, Brittany

  • @sarahdavis250
    @sarahdavis250 Місяць тому +2

    You have such a way of making me cry with laughter then cry actual tears. So much humor, knowledge, passion, etc. When you spoke on Christianity and religion, you spoke to my SOUL, girl!! I agree with you so deeply. I always felt so out of place at church, youth group functions, and so on. Faking it and feeling uncomfortable. I only enjoyed church and youth group so i could hang with my friends. I was always forced to go to church, attend youth group, etc. The fear and guilt based practices are abhorrent. When you said that music theory folks talk about the chords of worship songs being intentional and another form of manipulation, it blew my mind. It makes SO much sense! The severity of manipulation and gaslighting religion performs is disgusting. I have low-level PTSD from religion and all that. I'm 42, and I only found a spirituality that makes me feel good, comfortable, and true joy. I connect to the universe and nature, and I don't have to feel guilty or have to fake it.
    When you said music is like spirituality, you're absolutely right. Music can connect to my soul more than perhaps anything else. My BFF and I went to a concert with our favorite band a yr or 2 ago. We have seen them so many times. The lead singer, the band, and the lyrics are just incredible. They stand up against bullying, promote mental health awareness, and suicide prevention. Their set lasted 2 full hours, and I've never felt more spiritually cleansed in my life. It had nothing to do w religion or god, just pure compassion, empathy, and goodness. I told my BFF that this concert was my church, and the lead singer was the pastor. I've never ever in my life felt that way in a church or church-related. The church and religion itself made me so scared, paranoid, guilty, and all the worst feelings. The god they pushed on me at such a young age made me rebel against "god." Now, I feel like the universe is looking out for me. I tell the moon my sorrows and secrets. I recharge with the sun. I would rather spend every minute in nature, surrounded by flora and fauna than literally any person. Anyway...guess I needed to get this off my chest, as well. Thank you for your vulnerability, it makes me feel more seen and heard than most. You get it. Thank you. ❤

  • @Marzzizle101
    @Marzzizle101 Рік тому +163

    I am actually so thankful for how she graphically went in on Ethel Cain!!!!! Ethel deserves SO much praise and attention for her masterpieces, truly. She is beyond incredible and I'm so glad to see her get visibility. Thank you for making this omg you BEAUTIFULLY explained your own struggles and I could relate so much.

  • @bianquesitos4960
    @bianquesitos4960 5 місяців тому +4

    I didnt grow in a religious household, but this podcast literally made me CRY with you. It's so cool the way you address this issue bc it's so real and the way you explain it spreads compassion, empathy, love and understanding in general, PLUS your wording it's just perfect. All love and support to you brittany ❤️

  • @shynye
    @shynye Рік тому +75

    Florence Welch and Ethel Cain singing "Morning Elvis" live together was one of the most haunting things I've ever listened to. If they did more collabs I'd cry 🥰
    P.S. this pod is a treasure

    • @gemule
      @gemule Рік тому +1

      wow, thank you for sharing that, will hunt that down

  • @yourfavoritevampir3
    @yourfavoritevampir3 6 місяців тому +6

    I used to cry on the bathroom floor thinking I was going to hell at 14 because I had a crush on a girl in my class and I kept trying to deny myself

  • @JonArbucklesBf
    @JonArbucklesBf Рік тому +96

    As a queer person who's grown up in an extremist Christian household, having to worry at 10 years old about being sent to hell for all eternity for being something that just felt so natural and joyous to me was really extremely damaging. I even remember, as a kid, feeling like a sinner for questioning scripture and just being told blatant misinformation about social issues. When I came out to my parents, they forced me to read aloud those notorious scriptures that have gotten so mistranslated to the point where they lost their original meaning. A lot of my Christian friends tried to 'pray the gay away' almost every devotion, and when that didn't work (shocker), it caused me to live in this constant state of guilt, denying my gender and sexuality and downplaying my basic needs because of how my self-value declined. They also constantly talk about'signs' of armageddon, saying, 'It could happen at any moment. THE PARANOIA THAT CAME FROM THAT DUDE
    ALSO WITH PRETENDING IT DUDE OH MY GOSH I RELATE TO THAT.
    Anyway, thank you for this amazing episode, Brittany. I really needed this. ❤ (CoD benis)

  • @starbomb64
    @starbomb64 Рік тому +177

    Nearly sent this to my mother for the beautifully articulated explanation of religious trauma until I remembered the 10 minutes intro of Brittany talking about seeing a Ghost cosplayer's ding dong on Twitter

    • @starbomb64
      @starbomb64 Рік тому +19

      26:45 - 42:33 (personal timestamps for later)

  • @frann474
    @frann474 Рік тому +144

    I grew up in a family that isn't religious at all and so I don't understand but it's so strange how people lose all empathy and kindness for those who find comfort in other religions/spirituality, it's really jarring to hear people talk about their traumas with religion. Thank you for this episode brittany❤

    • @brooke4608
      @brooke4608 Рік тому +22

      I honestly envy people who grew up in a sort of neutral house when it comes to religion because man the feeling of getting older and for the first time seeing your beliefs from an unbiased perspective and suddenly realizing the huge possibility that none of it is real, suddenly having everything you’ve ever known about life and death and your purpose and your existence and your identity and everything just ripped away. It’s so scary. I just kinda wish I had the oppertunity to grow up in an environment where I could decide those things for myself and be able to see the different perspective and possibilities so it wouldn’t slam me in the face one day as a teenager. All I know is I’m doing a lot of reconstruction, and I’m not sure if It will lead me back to Christianity or it will lead somehwere else. All I know is I want to believe in what I believe in because that’s what I genuinely think is right and not just cuz it’s been indoctrinated into me yk

    • @frann474
      @frann474 Рік тому

      @@brooke4608 I wish you the best in your journey, my friend✨️

  • @Charmander603
    @Charmander603 Рік тому +278

    I don't think I've ever wanted to be friends with someone more than I want to be friends with Brittany

  • @heatherlxnn
    @heatherlxnn 11 місяців тому +138

    A full listen through of Preacher's Daughter always makes me physically and emotionally sick and uncomfy, and that's how you know it is so god damn GOOD. A God tier album if there ever was one.

  • @bailey6500
    @bailey6500 Місяць тому +2

    this is honestly my most favorite brittany vid and i’ve watched pretty much every one on this channel 😭

  • @ellatomkins1105
    @ellatomkins1105 Рік тому +93

    I’m 19 and went to a Catholic School for six years of my life. As a kid, it fucks your mind up. It truly does and there are some nasty people who are saying that they are “Christ-Like” unfortunately. Brittany, your words spoke to me and I felt them all in my bones. You truly are a gift to this world. Thank you for the content and words you speak❤️‍🩹

  • @sophiepotts9301
    @sophiepotts9301 Рік тому +80

    Brittney. I can’t find the words to properly share the appreciation I have for you. I’m currently a “spiritual” southerner who is left leaning, however I have not always been that way. To watch someone who is well known and well established that can so beautifully articulate the hardships of our shared upbringing is so comforting and validating. From a Bitter Southerner, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

  • @Apogean1211
    @Apogean1211 Рік тому +27

    This is quite possibly the most "Brittany Broski" you have ever been. The Duality of Brittany was on full effect for this episode. Truly beautiful to witness.

  • @savannahlewis8517
    @savannahlewis8517 2 місяці тому +2

    As a Christian it is sad to hear that many people lack a supportive group at church. Christianity is not a solo sport, without a group who doesn’t judge you for your mistakes but lifts you up instead is very important in every Christian walk with God. Even Jesus has 12 disciples to walk with him on earth, that is proof that we can’t walk with God alone and that we need community.

  • @KatnaHG27
    @KatnaHG27 Рік тому +55

    I definitely cried with you on this one. I remember going to church retreats from age 11 or so, guided through manipulation through chords and shouting preachers, giving testimonies of other children “feeling the homosexuality fall of their bodies” at the hands of the Holy Spirit. My own family weeping at my unfaithfulness, saying they’d miss me in heaven. I was only 14. I understand, Brittany, and thank you for putting into words the dark emotions I’ve carried with me since I was a kid. You are not alone

  • @kee-rockrandom1079
    @kee-rockrandom1079 Рік тому +48

    5:02 it's so cathartic to have Brittany say literally everything I think/feel out in the open, for everyone online to hear. like the way she so freely and unapologetically says these things, so we can be giddy & giggly alongside her-- mother fr

  • @Giles0333
    @Giles0333 Рік тому +53

    its really comforting to think most of us who relate to this, we are the black sheep. Its just a huge flock of black sheeps here at Broski Nation and i love it.

  • @catpitts7067
    @catpitts7067 11 місяців тому +4

    I listened to this episode on the way to work this morning and cried the whole way there. Started out as sad tears when she talked about her childhood and the times she wishes could of been spent on other things instead of being in the church(because I can relate to that) and then very joyful tears when she started speaking on now being so happy to be alive (because I can also relate to that). This episode was so nice to listen to knowing my experience growing up in the church wasn’t singular to me.

  • @JakeTahoeMusic
    @JakeTahoeMusic Рік тому +36

    As a queer man who grew up playing guitar in worship bands for Southern Christian churches, I relate so much to this trauma. Thank you for sharing the frustrations so many of us have gone through. It's heartfelt moments like this, juxtaposed beautifully with our weekly Ghost cosplay thirst update, that make this podcast so amazing!

  • @itsPayton358
    @itsPayton358 Рік тому +42

    Gibson Girl is actually Isaiah pimping Ethel out… drugging her up and pimping her out and then she’s being murdered in August Underground. Ptolemaea is her hallucinating from the shit ton of drugs. I love this album. And I loved your insightful critique on religion and how vulnerable you always are with your audience. You are a beautiful human, Brittany. ❤️

  • @mckayaitch7335
    @mckayaitch7335 Рік тому +33

    Girl. As a 44 year old woman born and raised in Mississippi in the southern baptist church I could not relate more to everything you’ve said. I consider myself an ex Christian and the isolation and severing of all those former connections is so crushing. I left the church years and years ago and I’m still working my way out from under all the ways in which it changed my life and me. Listening to you talk about this stuff is very healing even for someone who’s farther out from it than you are. Love you and everything you do!! You are a beautiful light in this world and I give all credit for that to you not to god.

    • @hannahblackwell3175
      @hannahblackwell3175 23 години тому

      I hope ur doing well now🫶I'm 18 in the exact same boat

  • @emmasophia3482
    @emmasophia3482 9 місяців тому +3

    Brittany,
    I don’t know if you’ll see this. But if you do, thank you for being you. I’ve watched you here and there throughout the years and have been binging you during H3’s break and stumbled upon this episode.
    I’ve been through a lot in 25 years. And I think a lot of it is tied to religious trauma. You speaking on this made me tear up because it’s really difficult finding people who can reach your soul and speak the words you can’t find. Thank you for being so open and honest about everything. You make me laugh until I’m tearing up, but you’re also so genuine and warm that it makes me tear up. You’re a true voice for those of us who do not have much of one.
    Signed a fan from a small town in Tennessee awaiting the day I can escape to a better place❤️

  • @fatimah4408
    @fatimah4408 Рік тому +28

    please never stop creating Brittany. I grew up Muslim but I’ve never felt more connected to an online figure (gross Ik) and you make me feel valid in a way no community of people have. I know community is possible and I’ve seen how beautiful it can be and how we as a younger generation can create it but religion has been exploited against us. Please never stop speaking

  • @trueMAXIMUS
    @trueMAXIMUS 11 місяців тому +63

    god i actually started sobbing so hard when she was talking about being the black sheep of the family simply because you’re not as pious as your family members, and being left-leaning instead of conservative. my entire life i’ve felt so alone and on the outside of my family and it was just validating hearing just how many other people have gone through the same thing. anyway that’s all i had to say, this was a good episode

  • @CassidyDeStefano
    @CassidyDeStefano 5 місяців тому +2

    I can relate so much Brit! I’m actually currently in the process of separating from the Christian religion. I too was/am absolutely traumatized. I too have met some INCREDIBLE Christian’s with so much love in them and on the contrary have met some of the worst people. I have been SO judgmental in the past- constantly comparing myself to others and questions and being angry over why other who were “worse” than me were living better and fuller lives. Religion brought constant comparison into my life. I have been one of those terrible Christian people.
    I broke down to my husband a few weeks ago. I was so confused that I thought it was our marriage that was making me unhappy. Religion almost cost me my husband. I have a wonderful husband. We are happy together- I wasn’t happy. I wasn’t happy with this religion reigning in my life.
    So now I’m slowly but surely accepting what I truly feel.
    Some of the scariest parts of leaving the religion contain the fear of burning in hell forever if you leave. I’m still scared. I’m terrified. That’s why I’m not fully there. Religion contains SO much fear as you know.
    I’m so happy you talked about this. You talked about it in a way that is beautiful and well thought out. I know you’re helping so many people with this video.
    Thank you Brit!

  • @alegose596
    @alegose596 Рік тому +37

    I’ve never felt more validated. EVERYTHING you spoke about, it was like you were reading my mind. Down to the lying in church, pretending, because I just wanted to fit in and keep my friends. I’m so happy I’ve left the church and I’ve found my people and myself. I’ve never been happier and more fulfilled, EVER

  • @JacquelineJoestar
    @JacquelineJoestar Рік тому +98

    The “untapped estrogen” pipeline is something serious and that I too am a victim of 😂😂😂😂 Thank you President Broski for another excellent episode, this one is for the history books.

  • @goldengrapes7180
    @goldengrapes7180 2 місяці тому +2

    "Cain then murdered Abel, whereupon God punished Cain by condemning him to a life of wandering... THIS EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY HELLO FRESH"
    That transition took me clean out

  • @camrynpless4380
    @camrynpless4380 Рік тому +61

    I grew up southern baptist and came out to my parents 3 years ago and now, after being away from my faith for 2 years because of the hate I received, I am opening myself up to it again. I just wish I could sit and talk about it with you because we had so much of the same experience and you said so many things I feel on a deep level. I don’t feel unconditional love from my family but I do from other people in my life that aren’t even religious. I am convinced my family doesn’t believe in unconditional love because they feel like loving everyone means accepting everyone’s sins. It’s such a sad and corrupt way to live and think. They always say “this isn’t the life God has intended for me” and my response is, maybe it was? Maybe he made me this way so I could show you how small your minds are. Maybe I was your eye opener. Because they make me feel terrible about myself for simply loving people as they are but doesn’t God tell us to come as we are? I don’t believe my God is bad but I believe the church is and I believe Christian’s, southern Christians for specifically are the reason a lot of people turn away from it when our soul purpose on this earth, according to God/the Bible was to love people the way He loved us which was enough to die for us. So what’s the point? I will never understand and that’s something I’m having to learn.

    • @nahimgood4
      @nahimgood4 Рік тому

      Eloquent and beautiful.

    • @dumbgenious1960
      @dumbgenious1960 Рік тому +2

      One thing I read to remind me of the love of faith is that the only thing more painful to god than crucifixion is the thought of spending an eternity without you

  • @earthworm11
    @earthworm11 Рік тому +35

    brittany covering preacher’s daughter is a deeply personal gift to me . i am STRAPPED in and SAT for this episode

  • @wmill8843
    @wmill8843 3 місяці тому +1

    Brittany, you have encapsulated what this ongoing trauma and experience and yearning and dichotomy is for so many of us so, so beautifully. With such insight, and intelligence, and empathy. I’m 30 and grew up in the very fundamentalist, evangelical community of Sydney Australia, and my little 16 year old queer self feels SOOTHED by your words. I love your videos and collabs and your sense of humour, but I’m really struck here by what a voice you have here in this experience, and what an asset this is and could be for so many young, struggling people who didn’t sign up to be born in these communities. You should write a book! Thanks for taking the time and effort to really unpack this for those of us that have lived this and continue to live it and really get it. Xoxo