I love you and this is incredibly brave and strong. And I'm sorry we didn't understand the signs. But now we're all here for you and this helps us help you!
Lucy Moon I come across this video by accident but I'm glad I did. I work for a substance misuse service and I see alot of people come through the doors wanting support, they say that's the hardest part and by just realising that you may need help is the 1st step. this is an Amazing video to share for all to see especially someone as young as you so show others who may be suffering like you. There are so many support groups out there, our service runs a group called SMART Recovery which always has great tools to help in your recovery. All the best in your recovery. x
I am in tears. You are the exact same as me and every time I tell my friends I'm going to stop drinking completely they say the same thing... "just slow down." I have been trying to "slow down" for YEARS but it just isn't possible. I have one drink and I can not stop for the life of me. I have destroyed relationships by becoming a monster when I drink. But I think being a sweet, innocent 20 year old girl (when I'm sober) confuses people. I know I have a problem and I need to stop... thank you for this video. I truly believe it is fate that this was on my recommended page and I wish you all the best, Lucy. We've got this!
Erin I’m in the same boat! I’m ruining my life. I hate who I’ve become! I don’t know what to do. I’m so ashamed of myself! I want to stop so bad, but I can’t! I truly feel this will kill me.
My dear, lm leaving my number to you so that you can send me a message on whatsapp. I'm intending to open a group on whatsapp so we help each other to get rid of the monster inside us that has been sucking our blood for years. Let's do that together. You can ask anyone who needs help like me to join us. 00905524353125
For Lucy: I'm 17 and have lived with my loving family my whole life. My father is an alcoholic and it doesn't change how I see him. He drinks because his service in the war, his mistakes, and his alcoholism. Our family deals with it well and always remind our selves its not the person its the disease. People who truly love you will stay to support you and can attend Al-anon for loved ones of alcoholics. And you can attend AA meetings. Find people to talk to about it and help you. I often hear, 90 meetings in 90 days. He can do it and so can you. and even if you fail and start over it is a life long battle and you'll have to get up and keep fighting it. Love your videos by the way, beautiful person, beautiful life. Dont give it up
I'm so sorry your father is struggling. Mine does as well- I know how much sadness and stress and trauma you can suffer when you have to be responsible for a parent. I hope that you have someone to turn to for emotional support. I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry. Hugs from one daughter to another
The last person I dated (and had to break up with) is an alcoholic, so thank you - this was incredibly enlightening. I still have feelings for her and I don't know what to do about it, but suffice it to say she's done things much worse than the ones you described in this video, so...I don't know. But this video makes me feel like maybe I can understand her a little bit better, since she's described many of the same things. Best of luck in your journey to sobriety.
+moscowmasha the best support I received was from my ex boyfriend, he really helped me. If you can, it's worth trying to work through things and giving her another chance as you might be the key to her improvement
I wanted to chime in on this for just a tic and say that I really believe that anyone struggling with alcohol issues is dealing with something much bigger. Alcohol is one of the largest industries on our planet, it's one of the most damaging poisons we've legalized for consumption and anyone suffering with alcohol abuse is dealing with something so far out of their control and something that is pushed so hard onto you. I'm not gonna assume what your significant other had done while under consumption- but I know that I've dated people in the past who have done some VERY irreversible things they never intended and can never take back.. But I know that if that alcohol had not been given to them on a silver platter ontop of all the other things going on in life, they never would have done them. :( In the very least, stay in contact with them and like Lucy says, you really could be a key to their improvement.
gosh, i know it's weird to say, but it's so good to see lgbtq+ people from russia. it just makes me feel a bit better, since i live in this country as well and since i am the part of this community. and i know what you mean. one of my friends (she's turning 16) is an alcoholic - she won't face it, but every time i see her drinking it makes me feel weird. and now i feel like i needed to support her and tell her she might need some help. but i didn't.
Lost Goose I've seen some very eye-opening documentaries about being lgbtq in Russia, (no offense to Russians, and not that homophobia doesn't exist everywhere to some degree) but it must be incredibly lonely and difficult. So I'm sending you love and hugs from Canada.
I'm 18 and I've never gotten drunk, but I have an extremely addictive personality. I've decided that I'm just going to completely stay away from alcohol. With all I've seen (which is not even that much compared to some) I know that it wouldn't be worth it because it's ruined so many lives, and even the lives it doesn't ruin, it really doesn't make them any better. I don't judge people for the way they live but I do wish more people my age would see it the way I do: more harmful than it's worth.
Perhaps a good call. I also have a personality that seems wired for addiction and I'm also careful about alcohol as there are many alcoholics in my family. I think it's important to note though that there are many people who can have completely functional lives while consuming things that can be incredibly destructive for other people. I encourage you to stick to your guns, or venture into things like alcohol slowly and measuredly. Good luck four years on!
You just 100% explained me. I'm so with you girl. I'm 16 days sober right now. Before that I was 8 days sober, and before that I was 32 days sober. You will most likely have hiccups along the way, but it will be so worth it. The first week is 100% the most difficult, after that when I reached the month mark I hadn't craved a drink for about two weeks. I wish I'd just stayed sober the whole time since then...... I'm oddly lucky in the fact that I'm chronically ill/disabled so I rarely get to actually "go out" and drink. I did all my drinking at home, alone, so it was mostly easy to hide. It became entirely a crutch for my pain relief and anxiety. But even from home I could be reckless. I'd end up talking to people on Facebook chat and revealing embarrassing things or saying things totally out of line. Or I'd post a status or tweet and get in arguments because it's something I normally wouldn't say. Then on those rare occasions I would go out.... my god, the shame the next day and the regret is absolutely palpable. The final straw though is that the last holiday I took with my mum I ruined due to my binge drinking for two weeks straight. That was last summer. She then passed away this year in May. That regret alone was enough to know I had to stop. I'm here for you Lucy. If you ever need someone to talk to outside of everyone you know then please feel free to get in touch with me on twitter (@ witchybuns) or whatever. We've spoken via DM before + you were kind to me so I want to reach out with kindness to you. Much love + light xo
Witchy Wellness I'm happy you're taking steps to improve. I'm so sorry about your mum, hiccups don't matter as you said and I think you're bloomin amazing!
Thank you for talking about this. My struggle with alcohol has been intrinsically linked with my mental health. I've made so many mistakes from drinking excessively...it's hard to come back from those especially because it's easy to put it down to alcohol when really, there's something else going on. I'm very similar with the inability to limit drinking to 1 or 2, I've had to go sober in order to try and heal my relationship with alcohol but I don't think it's safe for me to ever have it.
My mother was an alcoholic for the past few years and passed away in July. We never saw the signs. Alcoholics are not just people who stagger around and slur their words and sit in the pub all day. Alcoholics may seem perfectly fine. Alcoholism does not make sense to most people. People need support and need to know it's okay to speak about their problems.
I'm glad you made this video, I am the same age as you and had the same problems with alcohol consumption. I used to promise myself every week I'd quit but the uncontrollable urge isn't easy to repress, and mixing tonnes of alcohol with antidepressants was a huge mistake of mine. I've now been sober since January 1st 2016 and I don't regret it at all. It's not easy at all but it will be 100% worth it if you are determined!
Even though I'm 16 and technically still underage, all of my friends have been drinking heavily for a few years now, and that's the reason I've decided to be straight edge. I know I have an addictive personality, and because I've always been a little (aka a lot) insecure around people and I always want people to like me, I know that if I started drinking there's a high chance that something similar to this would happen to me. Also because of the supposed calming effects of alcohol as it is a depressant I know it would be so easy to use it constantly as a way to calm my anxiety, especially when I'm out in places with lots of people that would stress me out, so I really don't want to run that risk whatsoever. Alcohol can be a fun recreational drug that can be fun to drink in moderation, but the risk of it becoming an issue for me is too high for me to risk, and the potential negative side effects of that would be way too severe for me to risk for the sake of taking a substance I don't like anyway just because everyone else is and I want to fit in. You're so brave for making this Lucy, and the fact that you're aware of your problem and are working to make it right shows such great strength! I'm proud of you girl, keep going, if you slip up its okay, just focus on your little achievements along the way to keep you on track, and hopefully you'll be much healthier and happier for it! Much love ❤️
I think it was brave of you to post this, and I think youre taking a great attitude - although maybe it would be better not to 'do' drinking in the first place, thinking this way is a really mature way of acting - keep going! xx
Hey Lottie :) I am few years older than you, but just wanted to say I am exactly the same! and went/am still going through the same thing. As I have, I'm sure you will have experienced people not understanding why you don't drink. But you are so strong for identifying within yourself what is best for you. Keep at it, you're amazing xx
Hi Charlotte. I stopped drinking some 40 years ago when, as a sixteen year old going to parties with school friends and tipsy on cider, I found myself saying dumb things to girls (I love you) and having to feel embarrassed the next day. I, like you, recognised my addictive personality, I didn't like the taste of alcohol and I certainly didn't like its effect: All of which made the decision to not drink easy. What was slightly less easy was dealing with a pub society which then (late 1970's) didn't understand soft drinks on a night out. I might also say that it was a time when drink driving was socially acceptable and people told stories of and laughed about being too drunk to walk but driving home! Nevertheless I have actually received very little hassle for not drinking in all that time and I have never regretted not drinking. If your choice is to not drink, don't be diverted by social pressure (if it comes). If you are confident in yourself about your decision, people will accept it. You really can enjoy yourself just as much as those that are drinking and you will NEVER say or do something that you need to blame on drink. X
Hey Lucy! You are amazing, seriously. I've just stumbled upon your channel & I am so happy to have found you. Your content is original and you seem like such a great person. Thank you for talking about this very important subject that - as you said - nobody ever talks about. I couldn't have done it!
You said to me on Tuesday night that you were going to be filming this and I could not be prouder of you for doing this! I know it's so difficult and getting over the things you told me on Tuesday are hard. You are incredibly brave for doing this!
I've been having so many problems with my housemates/two closest friends in the last few months because of this exact issue and I've never been able to talk to them about it or explain myself because I felt that they would assume I was just making it up to excuse myself from my shitty drunken behaviour. I've never felt so reassured after watching a video in my life, it has honestly helped me so much to know that this is a real issue that other people are dealing with and can relate to. When you descibred the feeling of self hatred that you experience the morning after and the anxiety after you blackout, I related so strongly. I'm considering showing this video to my housemates so that I can finally explain what's been going on and hopefully they'll understand and we can fix our relationship. Thank you so much for this amazing video, Lucy!
Eve Hamill I have the same problem also unfortunately. And the black outs make it worse. My boyfriend recently told me about something I said/did that hurt him that I couldn't remember doing. He didn't believe that I couldn't remember it... But then when I finally was able to convince him I really couldn't he said it was pathetic... It broke my heart. And really made me hate myself and feel so hopeless, like I couldn't fix the problem. Like Lucy everyone, including my bf, have told me that my suggestion of quitting alcohol is an overreaction. I don't know what to do....
Bathroom Jams: It sounds like people in your life think you're overreacting, that you don't have a problem, and at the same time you're seeing how you hurt your boyfriend when you were blacked out. All signs will never point in one direction, there will never be a voice that booms from the heavens to tell you to stop drinking. Your goal is to decide which direction most of the signs are pointing. Sometimes therapists can help you figure out where the signs are pointing and which ones you want to follow. I suggest finding a therapist who does motivational interviewing--the nice thing about that approach is that you call the shots, you decide what is best for you because you know yourself best. The therapist is there as a sounding board and to support you in whatever decision you make.
Bathroom Jams You must do what is right for you, not what others are saying is right for you. And it sounds like you know what YOU need to do. Take care 💜
Thank you so much for making this video Lucy, it's so powerful and I know it'll help some of your viewers immensely. Sending my love and strength to anybody who can relate to this xx
Rosianna Halse Rojas glad to finally hear from someone who can't relate to their sober self because everyone seems to think that a drunk mind speaks a sober heart but that's not true
This was so brave & so eloquent. Like you said, it's hard to wrap your head around something you haven't experienced - you helped us do that and honestly I feel better equipped to at least try and understand and help where we can. Well done Lucy! x
well done for uploading this, it takes a lot of courage to not only admit something like this but share your entire story with alcohol / relationship with it. a lot of this resonates with me, especially the turning into a different/awful/selfish person whilst drunk and drinking more than friends and having to hide that. i wouldn't go as far as to say i'm an alcoholic but you've reaffirmed the fact i do have a problem and need to work on it, so thank you! you'll have helped so many people with this video xxx
Hey Yasmin, I'm a journalist writing a piece for Stylist about friendships that have been negatively affected by alcohol and I'd love to speak to you about your experience (if you're comfortable!) If so, my email is in the about section on my page x
Your comment on your social circles loving alcohol hit home for me. I'm coming up for 1 year sober and finding things to do with friends that werent alcohol was tough in the beginning. Even now tbh.
Alcoholism is a very difficult topic if you've been affected by it. It's extremely personal no matter what side of the fence you're on. My cousin has been sober for 12 years and has a PHD, has gotten married, and started a family. I don't understand personally, but nearly everyone in my family has alcoholism. I've seen the cycle and the destruction since I was born. But I'm not here to be negative. I just wanted to say you're incredibly brave to make this public & educational. I know it's cliche but taking the first step is so difficult, there isn't a proper word for it, but it's seriously important and things can only get better. Keep doing your best. If you slip up, find it in yourself to forgive yourself for it and don't give up. Overcoming an addiction will never be a cakewalk and no one can say your struggles aren't valid. But it's not impossible, and you're 100% on the right track. You might have heard this already, but picking up a new (relatively harmless) habit can help, in example coffee, gum, or hard candies has been known to help fill the desire to drink (or what have you) with something else. This can be applied to any situation; wash a dish when you feel the urge. Take stock of your clean dishes and think about how you were able to overcome it and hey, the dishes are done. Set goals to keep yourself motivated even if you have a relapse. Again, nothing harmful. This isn't 100% guaranteed but it might ease the process, and I sincerely hope this is helpful to someone. I promise you can do it. I'm proud of your courage and will to say that you need to address this despite the fact people around you tell you it's not a problem.
I'm literally going to do this with you. I've wanted to quit alcohol for years but I just couldn't, and now you gave me hope again. We can do this Lucy, I believe in us.
Dear Lucy, Please consider finding a support group or an AA community. You don't have to go through withdraw and the road to sobriety alone. The rates of success in remaining sober while in a support group are so much higher than trying on your own.
Hey Lucy. I think I suffer from a similar thing. I love drinking, I love feeling carefree. But for some reason when I drink I always do/say something that hurts someone I care about. Often I forget doing/saying these things the next day only to have someone address me about it. And when they do I've many a time been in disbelief. I can't relate to my drunk thoughts and actions when I'm sober. I don't agree with them. I refuse to identify with them. But I have to take responsibility. Because I did these things and sober me has to deal with the consequences. My s/o recently told me that my forgetting doing hurtful things is pathetic. That I was pathetic. And I feel pathetic. Thank you for this video Lucy.
You literally made me cry at the end. So many people told me when I suggested that maybe I should not drink alcohol anymore that it was silly and to just drink less. But I don't know if I can.. Like you said, once you have one a powerful urge takes over and makes you want more..
My friend just sent me this video and I as a 17 year old really appreciate this video and i'm so happy that iv'e realised my problem with alcohol in time before I do something that fucks up my life even more. Iv'e already destroyed a friendship of 10 years and I don't want to fuck up anymore. Thank you so much for making this video x
I think you're an incredibly brave young lady. Personally myself I love the taste of alcohol so I relate to that aspect. I have a glass or two of wine every evening to wind down and I'll spend a reasonable amount of money of a bottle because I enjoy it but I'm never drunk. I don't drink to get drunk, I drink because the alcohol I choose to drink tastes amazing. I'm hoping now that enjoying a nightcap isn't some kind of gateway to alcoholism....
I wish people would understand that alcoholism affects more than the drinker. It effects the people around them- alcohol creates abusers. The drinker MAY (not all) will abuse the people around them, mentally, physically, emotionally. So please if you are an alcoholic get help, it damages so many people. Thank you Lucy for making this video, I know this will help xxx
Also even at my age, I have such a strong WANT to drink but my birth dad was an extreme alcoholic- it runs in the family so for as long as possible I won't drink because I know I'll get, maybe not addicted but I won't want to stop?? I'm going to use all my will power not to because I know it's not right!
I don't want to tell you what to do and I actually really respect you for this comment. I just wanted to say that you probably can drink. If you understand the concequences of drinking and how to drink it you should be fine. Drinking safely will probably be better than simply denying it altogether. I don't know, I'm sure you will chose what's right but don't be worried if you want to have alcohol. You are strong and you will know what's right,
My mother is an alcoholic and got sober when I was 5, but knowing about her relationship with alcohol made the beginning of my relationship with alcohol toxic. I would feel guilty for having sips, feel disappointed in myself for having a drink, feel as though I had done terrible things simply because I had a hangover. Feel bad for having fun with my friends on a Friday in university, where I would have 2 or 3 drinks legally. It pays to be cautious. It is good to know what problem drinking behaviours are like before you drink, and to know what could happen. That being said, despite alcoholism running in my family I can happily say I'm not an alcoholic, and even since moving to the alcohol driven culture of the UK I'm not even a problem drinker. Your fear makes perfect sense, but also know it is possible to have a healthy relationship with alcohol despite your history.
I can really empathize with your situation. Similarly, growing up, my dad was an alcoholic and the illness has been passed on for many generations. Fortunately, he parted with the excessive drinking about 7 years ago, but the damage has been done. Growing up with an alcoholic realllllllly messes with you. I'm now physically unable to be around people who consume alcohol; it makes me too uncomfortable. I'm also too frightened to drink because I'm so fearful that I will easily lose control. But, I'm sure this extreme avoidance isn't very healthy either. I hope you can find a happy medium where the consequences of growing up with an alcoholic don't affect your life. I wish you nothing but the best!
This was really enlightening to watch Lucy. Being a 16 year old who has never gotten drunk (had a few 4% ciders but thats about the peak aha) you see alcohol and being drunk glorified within social media and the media in general. Education within alcoholism and being drunk is limited and lots of people who never drink alcohol go for the first time at 18 and completely black out because they have no idea what they are doing. This must of been such a hard video for you to make but believe me this was sooo helpful, thank you xxxxxx
yes!! Please do, I think a video like that would be so helpful and interesting to watch. I find every video you make interesting to watch but I especially think your perspective of that would be a good one xxx
Completely agree. I'm seventeen and have had much the same experience and though I doubt alcohol is ever going to be a problem for me (I'm generally not a huge fan of the taste), I know I have a very addictive personality and this video is so educational with regards to why you have to be *so* cautious with alcohol and substances like it. As a newly-graduated young adult I feel so fortunate to have been able to watch this video just as I'm about to head off into the world. Thank you so much for making it Lucy, I know it must have been incredibly difficult to film x
I've not had a single drop of alcohol for four years Lucy, it is possible! How incredibly courageous of you to make this video!! Build up a strong group of friends that don't want to go out as much but also love a cozy night in, chats and all that.. I have had so many bad experiences that I decided I needed to not drink again and doing this for so long, I can agree that it IS really annoying how people will look at you weirdly when you won't drink..ever.. but it's also something people will admire you for, secretly, because they actually wouldn't mind stopping either.. alcohol is a terrible drug of today's society and is so well hidden that no one ever looks at it as dangerous. by speaking up about this you've done the first step! keep going x
my mom is almost 10 years sober. She went to rehab and AA and never regretted it. She is one of the most incredible people I know. You can do this. Don't do it alone. Find your reason to get sober and hold tight. Be kind to yourself. You are so loved. Stay strong, Lucy.
I'm a recovering addict and I really enjoyed the way you put this out there it's a really brave thing and you are an inspiration I'm 4 years sober and its one day at a time. thanks for trying not many care enough to make the effort😌
Brains of people with addiction or addictive tendencies are often wired differently and we just get addicted fast and can't control ourself there. Thats why its also running in families, like my granddad and my uncle that I both never met were adicted to alchol too and I was addicted to pot, because I liked the feeling, and my calming/sleeping pills (and to throwing up, wich I view as addiction too), luckily I had to go to a psyicharty for some time, so I stay away from alcohol and drugs... Thank you a lot for making this video!
Fresh Arche I think I have addictive tendencies which is one of the reasons I don't do drugs including alcohol. My brother and my father also have these tendencies and my father also has a cannabis addiction. I'm not a psychologist so can't really tell if I really am more likely to get addicted to things but I assume it because I tend to can't stop doing things more than other people do and this happens to all sorts of things since I was 12. Because of that assumption I'm really glad I don't have the desire to take any substances that can harm me easily like alcohol. I'm trying to keep it that way cause if you never tried something you don't know what you're missing out on.
Fresh Arche You hit that point perfectly and sometimes it's not we're easily addictive to everything its just we have a specific weakness Mine was sex and coke but somehow weed and alcohol I could use occasionally and responsibly and never even think about going back once I knew I was nearing my limit But sex just I hooked up with someone once and lost my virginity and after that I had to fuck anything that walked for awhile I was hooking up with this bi dude and his bi girlfriend basically He introduced me to drugs like weed which when used right can be great and even a benefit its down right medical Now when I found coke that I haven't had much but after the first time I KNEW I needed more and I could simply not experience that feeling enough in this lifetime Luckily I've ended stuff with that guy and my current relationship is with someone who helps me stay off the bad shit and stay responsible with the other shit as TMI as this is gonna get even though I'm in a relationship I don't have sex enough to say I'm addicted anymore and I never even think of cheating Addiction is very real but a good support system can really change everything and that's what we forget is that it CAN be fixed If I came back from cocaine and sex with every living human then you can do anything and everything
Gizan Glyer there is no why o.o like...do you want to hear my traumatic backstory on how I got into a vicious cycle of binging and throwing up? Yeah I know that its called bulimia, but I didn't wanted to lose weight, I was already thin. Its just a thing that I did to cope o.o
Could I please just add that if there is excessive alcohol intake on a regular or daily basis you need to see your GP because going cold turkey may not be an appropriate option because it can lead to serious withdrawal symptoms. You may need medications such as benzodiazepines to stop these. Good luck with your sobriety Lucy! Xx
Eve Mee yes! This is so important! Withdrawal isn't just missing the alcohol but you could get really bad physical symptoms too. Also, Lucy, I don't regularly watch you but I really do wish you the best!
You are right in that going cold turkey can be dangerous in many cases, but benzodiazepines are among some of the most addictive prescription medications out there
Samantha diazapam is used frequently (at least in New Zealand) in the short term to treat the symptoms of alcohol withdrawal such as seizures. Some times they are necessary 😃
my dad has had this problem since waaaay before i was born. the difference there though is that he doesn't care that he hurts people, and he doesn't have your will to get better. so i just want to say it's really great of you to have this desire to change, since so many people with this problem don't want to address it. you're going to be okay, you're so brave and you can do this.
I'm really happy that you talk also about the shadow parts of life with your most onest words and not making everithing small. You helped definetely many people with the same problems-because now they can say" Hey, I'm not alone struggling with the same thing".
My mum used to drink too much and would become someone else, so I relate to you Lucy. I could not be more proud of her to leave it behind her. Mum I love you and are proud of you ❤️ Lucy you too, making the effort to stop is the first step my dear x
I'm so proud of you for making this video, I don't know exactly what you're going through because I can't relate with alcoholism but I can relate in terms of self harming. I started three years ago about six months before I was diagnosed with depression and since it's become my own addiction, a curse that I genuinely can't control, it's the first thing I turn to when any tiny thing goes wrong in my life. "I kid myself that I have self-control to stop but I don't". It's so true. I couldn't have phrased it better myself. Thank you for making this video, it really helped me. And relapses are okay, and that's what I keep telling myself. Two weeks and one day clean, and proud of myself for it :) all the best for the future, Lucy xxxx
Emilia Rachael I used to self harm too in the exact same scenarios as you- it was simply easier than facing problems head on, a way to mask the pain without having to confront and deal with it. Tomorrow morning at 9:12am I will be 50 days clean. I promise you that it can get better- I replaced the emotional support of cutting with music, and the effect it has had has been staggering. I still have my bad days, like anyone, and I've been close to relapsing almost every day, but it can and will get easier, I promise you. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you (I'm @carcrashcharlie on Twitter)- you're not alone in this, okay? ❤️
Lottie Lollie this is possibly the nicest message I've ever received online, thank you so much! things have been difficult again recently but I've managed to hold on,and it is slowly starting to get better, and I'm so proud of you for making it to 50 days that's honestly insane! Xxx
i have family members who have problems with alcohol and this made everything a lot clearer to me, i'm so proud of you for making this video. stay safe Lucy xx
Thank you for this. My dad was an alcoholic and recently passed away because of his drinking. I so appreciate any chance I get to understand him better. Blessings as you go on this brave and important journey
Hey Lucy, thanks for this video. It really hit me hard as my ex boyfriend was similar - he stated at Uni and his family drink a lot, but he was SUCH a different person. I couldnt get my head around how someone could be so perfect and amazing and then the minute he had a drink, he was an aggressive, horrendous, vile monster towards me. It's so crazy to her someone else discussing this. Well done you for talking about this. You're amazing x
P.S. I really, really relate to emotional hangovers. They're some of the worst emotional states I've ever, ever experienced. I said it before, but you are so not alone!
Connor Manning- AConMann is also a sober UA-camr and talks about his experiences with alcoholism from time to time- Have you heard of him? Anyway, thank you for sharing Lucy. Stay strong, we're here for you xx
My father is an alcoholic, and has been done and off sobriety. Whenever I would tell friends they would automatically assume that he was a bad person, but when he didn't drink he was such a wonderful and empathetic man.
I have been sober for 8 months. I will turn 50 years old this week and this is my first successful attempt at sobriety. I write about my experience on my Facebook page for the same reason you shared this. If it helps one person, it is worth it. I am sure you have helped so many with this video. I am sorry I just discovered you today, but I am excited to see your other videos.
I'm gonna be 2 years clean on Dec 6th. Took me several attempts and a shit lot of struggle to get where I am today but it's all so worth it. You can do it girl, props to you for speaking up and raising awareness. We're all in this together.
This is so incredible...I don't even know what to say. Thank you for talking about this; it's the first time I've ever seen a video about alcoholism and I think it really is something that needs to be more talked-about. Wishing you the best of luck down the road ;)
yes lucy! I havent drunk for over two and a half years now, since I was 17(!!!!!) but honestly it was such a good decision and now not drinking is easy xxxx
You are so strong. I believe in you. I've grown up around alcoholism my entire life. My uncle has lost everyone except maybe my mum and one or two other friends. Addiction lies in my blood and this is a legitimate fear of mine. I hope you can overcome this and I promise to love and support you through your journey whatever happens
I'm 17 (yes I know, I'm young) and had started drinking when I was 14. I would drink everyday, 3-4 shots of vodka on a school night, god only knows how much on a weekend, and I had no idea I had a problem. I developed Lupus (coincidently, and my liver has been thankfully unaffected) and so had to stop drinking due to the meds I was on. I didn't really give stopping a second thought as I had no idea I had a problem, but after only 3 days ended up in hospital due to the withdrawal symptoms. It's been 4 very hard months since my last drink but these past few weeks I've not had cravings as much. Thank you for sharing your story and helping to get rid of the stigma.
I don't drink at all (yet to be 18) but it is just nice to hear you talking about things like this and im proud of you for doing what you need to do to make yourself a better and healthier person.
No one talks about it because, unfortunately, alcohol consumption is so normalized, not to mention culturally significant for most people. I want you to know that I can relate to this and that I'm appreciative that you were brave enough to put this message out there.
I appreciate your honesty and transparency here. I'm so sorry that it's something that you struggle with alcohol, it's definitely something huge. The fact that you are aware that it is something in your life that you need to change is so huge. You are addressing the problem that is in your life and you are striving to move forward. I don't struggle with alcohol, but I do struggle with other things in my life. Here's to moving forward and making good decisions, Lucy. You go girl!
so I don't drink. I stopped because I knew I had too. I've dealt with depression and anxiety for years. one night. I had a couple drinks. it didn't help, it made my depression worse. it scared me to think that's the road I could go down. so I stopped. it wasn't easy, I still have issues with family acceptance that I don't drink. I know its not necessarily the same but you've now accepted the issue of alcohol and you're now dealing with it. That's already a massive step. wishing anyone and Lucy all the best with making steps forward to overcome this.
I know I'm not an alcoholic because I don't rely on it and I can go sober for a fairly long time. But I am very easily pressured and I'm a bad drunk. Your stories about how you act when you're drunk resonate with me, it's like I turn into a completely different person. I've said some awful things and lost some good people in my life because of it. It definitely stemmed from self-esteem issues, I figured alcohol would make me fun and confident, but it didn't. I'm lucky that I can choose to not drink and I really hope you can find help and peace with yourself. I do emphasise with some aspects but obviously I can't know how your experience feels. Just know there are people who care about you and you know yourself well enough to know you need to quit. We've got your back Lucy, good luck
Proud of you for speaking upon this. You being able to recognize the problem before it got worse is so strong of you and admirable. Sending you positivity on your journey of sobriety. Also, you are not alone and I too recognized a lot of the same effects of drinking alcohol in my own life in order to relieve my anxiety as a downward slope to something horrible and I am happy to continue my sobriety even if others think I don't have a problem. :)
I think you are really brave for uploading this! I've seen first hand what alcoholism can do to a person and a family so I wish you all the best! Stay strong xxx
This was me. I don't drink anymore because I become this narcissistic, self centred, selfish awful person. I cheated on boyfriends, would make a total fool of myself, would spend SO much money and was so nasty. The first time I had a night with my friends and woke up the next day without that awful knot in my stomach and I didn't have to worry about what I'd done and who I'd upset was AMAZING. It's worth it I promise. Take it step by step and talk about it, people will understand. If you need anything just ask xxx
Wow Lucy. What an amazing video and message! I am so impressed! I never had this problem, but I have realised quite early on that I really dislike how alcohol changes people. People say alcohol can bring the real you out (because you are much braver and not shy, etc) and I think this is in NO WAY the truth. We have to work on being confident and 100% ourselves when sober. Alcohol is an addictive drug, and getting drunk should not be the only way or even a legitimate option on ''how to have fun''. I have had family members die due to alcoholism and I truly believe that some people have had their problems stemmed from uni or even high school. I had my fun too and I get that it sorta belongs to the culture...but I also think it is absolutely gone way over board. So so inspiring Lucy. YOU CAN DO THIS
Until I watched this video I had stereotyped "drunkeds" as these 50 yr old men with beer bellies who go down to the pub and drink tons being aware that they need to stop but they dont. This has opened my mind to a whole new perspective as you are someone I admire. I hope with the support of your friend and family you can fight this. i love you x
My mom is a chronic drinker. She is drinking every night, one of my earliest memories is when I was very little and walked into the kitchen seeing her passed out, snorting like a pig with the empty whiskey (or whatever) bottle in her hand. That picture was often present in my life as I was growing up (and still is). Now I pretend it doesn't bother me because the addiction has completely taken over her and I feel helpless. I used to play it mad at her or not talk to her until she apologizes and promises to stop. Thousands of unkept promises and yet I still thought that every time was different. I often check if she's still breathing while asleep and the thought that someday I won't see her chest rise beneath the blankets terrifies me.
I'm very proud of you for writing this! Maybe you already have, if not, talking to someone close or to a stranger (on a helpline or something) would maybe be a good option? My father (who also has an alcohol problem) is in therapy now and it helps a lot. I wish you all the best!!
"I kid myself that I have the self-control to stop but I don't" Damn that hit me hard. This is what I do when it comes to eating. Eat healthy throughout the day, tell myself I can have a couple sweets and then stop and be fine, but then I spend the next 5 hours of non stop binging. I feel SO confident that I can control it, but as soon as I start, I feel like I can't, and then u have that lovely cycle of self hatred
I've been thinking about this topic a lot recently. This is such a hard video to make but I'm really proud of you for doing it. I'm sure you'll have enough willpower to fight it. You have all my support, if you ever need to talk or get distracted, here I am. Stay strong, I'm sure you'll make it
Thank you for being vulnerable and making this video, Lucy. It was very informative. My dad was an alcoholic and I've mostly stayed away from the stuff because I know that alcoholism is biologically inherited. I've always figured that most people who turn to alcohol in an unhealthy way used it as a crutch. Like maybe they were trying to cope with something traumatic that happened or they were self treating an undiagnosed mental illness. I'm sure that's the case with many people, but this shows there are other factors that could lead to alcoholism. And you're right that there is a stereotype of what an alcoholic looks like. They aren't all middle aged men and they can be young adults in their early twenties. I think that it's really important that we understand that anyone, of any background or age group, can have a problem. Addiction doesn't look the same for every person struggling with it.
I've just found this video. I know I'm a year late and you probably won't see it but I just wanted to thankyou for posting this. My diagnosis "binge drinker" has been recently reviewed, and after 3 difficult months I can finally say that I feel good. Although I'm still struggling with smoking cigarettes and weed its been a huge step forward for me. Thankyou for sharing your story. Much of what you described was strikingly simmilar to what I had experienced. I hope you are successful in your journey, stay strong!
Thank you for making this video. I honestly think alcoholism is so more widespread than it seems because its swept under the rug so often. But thank you for being so vulnerable and honest and making a video that can help others. I genuinely wish you the best!
"There is no one! No one is talking about this." This part of the video is exactly why I am so greatful you are doing this. Particularly cause I myself am 25 days sober today. There is so much I relate to in this video. I also struggle to really apply the term alcoholic to myself, at least for now. There really is this misconseption that you have to be on the brink of homelesness to be an alcoholic. I can easily go without a drink for months, so I can't be an alcoholic right?! It doesn't matter that if I do get a drink I can't stop. Or that at times the graving is so massive I can't even go and buy groceries cause I will tempted by the rows and rows of hard alcohol (a new problem i faced since moving to uk last september. at my home country alcohol, besides light beer, is only sold at government owned®ulated stores, easy to avoid). There clearly is a problem. And when I drink I get withdrawn and depressed, and that depression lasts for up to two week. Clearly my brain is not fit for drinking. Whether I am an alcoholic or not I guess is besides the point. But for now, I am not drinking. Like you said, you are not promising to never drink again, neither am I. I guess that would be setting yourself up to a failure. All I can do is say I won't drink today. And hope that tomorrow I will be just as strong to make and keep the same promise. I just wanna thank you for your bravery. We really need to talk about this more honestly. This is going to help a lot of people, and at least it has helped me!
I relate so so much to everything you've said and it warms my heart so much to see a young woman work to break the stigma because I so often feel like I'm alone in my demographic. I highly recommend a book called "Drinking, A Love Story." The author is a female and young professional so the perspective is particularly relatable. I learned so much from her story. And I also want to express that sobriety is so much harder, to nearly impossible, in isolation or without help. So I would really strongly encourage you to seek out AA, support groups, therapy, etc. to get support and solidarity with sobriety. I am SO proud of you and so grateful for you. Keep up the good work sistah, you got this. Xoxo
You are so strong Lucy. This is such an incredible video to have made, it was so eloquently put. We all have our demons and food is my mental illness too. You couldn't tell me to just have one sandwich at the UA-cam space! I am here if you ever want to grab some tea
I relate to this a lot! My dad is affected by this too, my whole life I've watched him have one drink and realise that he can't just have one or two, it's like an uncontrollable force that comes upon him till he's hammered. And he can be really unkind to family n friends in his drunk state, it's not cool. I had no idea a young girl like you and me could be affected by this! Thanks for sharing. I also have an impulse control disorder called trichotillomania where I have an insane urge to pull my eyebrow hair out (weird I know) and every year it's my resolution to stop the habit but it's so powerful I don't think I'll ever be able to stop pulling...
This was amazing. Good luck on your journey. My husband had the same problem, when he drank he couldn't stop and he became a different person. He has been sober for 7 years now. He still has friends that have known him forever that ask him to have just one. Just stay strong.
I dated a guy when I was 20 that was an alcoholic and it hurt me everyday that I was with him. Still to this day, I pray he got help. I thank you so much for trying. It's really admirable.
I am 15, I was on the verge of starting to get the symptoms you mentioned in the video, i stopped immediately, never ever will sip alcohol again. I feel dumb and regretful
It's really admirable that someone as young as you was able to identify a problem that many adults refuse to recognize. You should be proud of yourself.
From the age of 17-18 I was 100% an alcoholic, but I was so young I refused to believe I was, once I finally realised I had a problem I was able to fix it, i wish teens and young adults realised this more often.
I'm writing and deleting, writing and deleting, and I only now realise how brave this video is... No, I don't have an alcohol problem, I am straight edge, however I used to drink in high school (never more than one cup of anything), but when I got to college I stopped... Mostly thanks to people who I hang out with, because when I was in hs literally everyone was getting wasted and I was often called out as "the boring girl that doesn't drink". Plus they've tried to get me wasted soooo many times (but failed miserably because I am stubborn as hell and also have no general desire to fit in). When I got to college, I found people who also didn't like alcohol, and we have most amazing fun friendships ever! However, I don't think I ever told anyone why I don't drink... and it's because my dad was an alcoholic, and apparently, genetically, alcohol makes my family aggressive. I could, after just one drink, feel aggression building up in me. And guess what?! I don't need that bullshit. Sorry, I'm rambling, I guess I was just trying to say: 1. People react to alcohol differently. 2. Surround yourself with people that think it's cool that you don't drink. 3. IT WILL NOT MAKE YOU BORING (I honestly feel sorry for people who are only happy when drunk). 4. Please treat it like an addiction, because it is one. You have to cut out alcohol COMPLETELY otherwise it won't work. 5. If you ever need to talk to someone on why being sober is cool feel free to talk to me (this goes for anyone reading this)
LITERALLY this is soooooooo good. I have friends who have been through alcoholics anon and really benefitted. I have been at events when AA is being set up and an entire cross section of people walked through the doors. I have alcoholism in my family (not direct) and have chosen to be tt for a variety of reasons but the obvious included. I've seen friends at uni drinking and seen people drinking 'in a different way' as you say - this is true and is so so so valuable to be talked about literally thank you so much for your bravery.
I come from a family of recovering alcoholics. My partner is also a recovering alcoholic and when he was younger people told him he was fine and "everyone feels that way sometimes." I don't drink out of support for him and my family. It's so great to hear your experiences! Thanks for sharing! Love and support!
After watching the full video I just want to add that almost everything you described is EXACTLY what my partner went through. He's a musician so a lot of the events he has to go to have alcohol as well. One of the things that helped him most was looking up the science behind alcohol addiction. It helped him to know what to expect and to not blame himself for his symptoms. He has told me many times that every day gets easier. The hardest period was those first few days and weeks. I hope it gets better for you and I'm so glad you're on your recovery journey.
I watched this video when it came out two years ago - and I have come back after making some huge mistakes in my life while drinking, drinking way too much, getting black out drunk every time I go out and forget everything that happened. I also watched your video "when you've messed up" again. And I really relate to what you're saying apart from the Monster coming out. For me it's more that I like myself more usually when I'm drunk - more outgoing, funnier, meeting people more easily etc. But recently I've started to become more angry while drunk and hurt myself hitting walls and stuffs. I've most recently basically destroyed a friendship - although I can't push everything that happened on my drunk self. Alcohol didn't make me do it - it just happened more easily that way, but would have happened anyway. I am now trying to control how much I drink. I don't want to go sober completely, but limit myself to three drinks a night. Which can also be enough depending on the drink and day. It's just really really scary to acknowledge there is a problem in the way I drink.
I hope you will manage to get it under control and get better! I have friends in my life in similar situations to you who haven't realized they have a problem, and I'm proud of you for starting to acknowledge this and take steps to improve this.
Hey Anna, I'm a journalist writing a piece for Stylist about friendships that have been negatively affected by alcohol and I'd love to speak to you about your experience (if you're comfortable!) If so, my email is in the about section on my page x
I'm 18 and just started university, and this video made me recognize and actually admit to myself that I have a problem. I've been drinking since I was 15 and have always kind of worried that that was the case, but I related to legitimately everything you said. I essentially ruined one of my closest relationships this year because of drinking and "turning into an entirely different person" when I black out. Thank you so much, I cannot even express how much this video meant to me.
Well done for being so brave and talking about this. I feel guilty for my complete lack of awareness about alcoholism and am so glad you made this. Hopefully if i ever meet someone in my life with these issues i can show understand for what they are going through and treat them with empathy and love, not brush what they say off, or be unsympathetic. Good luck with being sober, and don't forget to reward yourself in other ways! :) x
my mother is/was also an alcoholic. i know exactly how you feel because the habit is so unhealthy. unfortunately it's very hard to get an alcoholic to quit or anything because its mostly down to the person who has the problem and no matter what you do it is their problem and it is mostly down to them and their decisions. It's horrible because it makes you feel torn between this kind of love and hate attitude. The most you can do for your mother is be there for her - if she turns to alcohol when shes down, or trying to fill some kind of void, then talk to her and try and get out of her what she may be hiding inside. My mother was drinking a lot because she was very depressed about debt, guilt, etc and when we talked it out together and I asked her questions (almost like a councellor would) it really helped her, and although she still drinks today (because I, and you, have little control over what someone else decides to do) she is a lot better because she's not hiding all these pent up emotions all the time. Just be a friend to your mom, be there for her, let her know that she is amazing without the alcohol. Alcoholics can be selfish, manipulative, and lie a lot, so its hard. But try to remember its not her, its the addiction x
I love you and this is incredibly brave and strong. And I'm sorry we didn't understand the signs. But now we're all here for you and this helps us help you!
i love you so much dodie aaa and also i agree, she and everyone else dealing with this is so brave and incredible and strong ! we're all here for you
You've been amazing dodes. I didn't even understand the signs! Love
Lucy Moon I come across this video by accident but I'm glad I did. I work for a substance misuse service and I see alot of people come through the doors wanting support, they say that's the hardest part and by just realising that you may need help is the 1st step. this is an Amazing video to share for all to see especially someone as young as you so show others who may be suffering like you. There are so many support groups out there, our service runs a group called SMART Recovery which always has great tools to help in your recovery. All the best in your recovery. x
Love you Lucy, you are an incredible woman for posting this video...you're my hero❤👄love you n support you always❤❤❤❤❤
I'm proud of you
I think alcohol and getting drunk frequently is a bit too normalized in general. Probably why no one can see when there is clearly a problem.
This must have been so hard to make. Mad respect.
I am in tears. You are the exact same as me and every time I tell my friends I'm going to stop drinking completely they say the same thing... "just slow down." I have been trying to "slow down" for YEARS but it just isn't possible. I have one drink and I can not stop for the life of me. I have destroyed relationships by becoming a monster when I drink. But I think being a sweet, innocent 20 year old girl (when I'm sober) confuses people. I know I have a problem and I need to stop... thank you for this video. I truly believe it is fate that this was on my recommended page and I wish you all the best, Lucy. We've got this!
Erin which branf is ur fav
Erin I’m in the same boat! I’m ruining my life. I hate who I’ve become! I don’t know what to do. I’m so ashamed of myself! I want to stop so bad, but I can’t! I truly feel this will kill me.
My dear, lm leaving my number to you so that you can send me a message on whatsapp. I'm intending to open a group on whatsapp so we help each other to get rid of the monster inside us that has been sucking our blood for years. Let's do that together. You can ask anyone who needs help like me to join us.
00905524353125
I'm the very same way too. Im going to aa tomorrow
Same! I hope you guys have found peace.
For Lucy: I'm 17 and have lived with my loving family my whole life. My father is an alcoholic and it doesn't change how I see him. He drinks because his service in the war, his mistakes, and his alcoholism. Our family deals with it well and always remind our selves its not the person its the disease. People who truly love you will stay to support you and can attend Al-anon for loved ones of alcoholics. And you can attend AA meetings. Find people to talk to about it and help you. I often hear, 90 meetings in 90 days. He can do it and so can you. and even if you fail and start over it is a life long battle and you'll have to get up and keep fighting it. Love your videos by the way, beautiful person, beautiful life. Dont give it up
+Dork lots of love to you and your family
I'm so sorry your father is struggling. Mine does as well- I know how much sadness and stress and trauma you can suffer when you have to be responsible for a parent. I hope that you have someone to turn to for emotional support. I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry. Hugs from one daughter to another
Dork porno
Dork surrender to win collygraham.com/life-story/
9
BIG LOVE LUCY! This is incredibly brave and admirable of you. God speed
As the daughter of a regularly relapsing alcoholic, I really appreciate you talking about this, thank you.
The last person I dated (and had to break up with) is an alcoholic, so thank you - this was incredibly enlightening. I still have feelings for her and I don't know what to do about it, but suffice it to say she's done things much worse than the ones you described in this video, so...I don't know. But this video makes me feel like maybe I can understand her a little bit better, since she's described many of the same things. Best of luck in your journey to sobriety.
+moscowmasha the best support I received was from my ex boyfriend, he really helped me. If you can, it's worth trying to work through things and giving her another chance as you might be the key to her improvement
I wanted to chime in on this for just a tic and say that I really believe that anyone struggling with alcohol issues is dealing with something much bigger. Alcohol is one of the largest industries on our planet, it's one of the most damaging poisons we've legalized for consumption and anyone suffering with alcohol abuse is dealing with something so far out of their control and something that is pushed so hard onto you. I'm not gonna assume what your significant other had done while under consumption- but I know that I've dated people in the past who have done some VERY irreversible things they never intended and can never take back.. But I know that if that alcohol had not been given to them on a silver platter ontop of all the other things going on in life, they never would have done them. :( In the very least, stay in contact with them and like Lucy says, you really could be a key to their improvement.
I wish you all the best in your struggle against alcohol, thanks for sharing your story
gosh, i know it's weird to say, but it's so good to see lgbtq+ people from russia. it just makes me feel a bit better, since i live in this country as well and since i am the part of this community.
and i know what you mean. one of my friends (she's turning 16) is an alcoholic - she won't face it, but every time i see her drinking it makes me feel weird. and now i feel like i needed to support her and tell her she might need some help. but i didn't.
Lost Goose I've seen some very eye-opening documentaries about being lgbtq in Russia, (no offense to Russians, and not that homophobia doesn't exist everywhere to some degree) but it must be incredibly lonely and difficult. So I'm sending you love and hugs from Canada.
I'm 18 and I've never gotten drunk, but I have an extremely addictive personality. I've decided that I'm just going to completely stay away from alcohol. With all I've seen (which is not even that much compared to some) I know that it wouldn't be worth it because it's ruined so many lives, and even the lives it doesn't ruin, it really doesn't make them any better. I don't judge people for the way they live but I do wish more people my age would see it the way I do: more harmful than it's worth.
Addict with a Phøne Wow, that’s amazing of you. How awesome! :)
Perhaps a good call. I also have a personality that seems wired for addiction and I'm also careful about alcohol as there are many alcoholics in my family. I think it's important to note though that there are many people who can have completely functional lives while consuming things that can be incredibly destructive for other people. I encourage you to stick to your guns, or venture into things like alcohol slowly and measuredly. Good luck four years on!
It's so hard staying sober it really is but I've been sober for 3 months now, it is possible Lucy 💓 keep strong
i'm glad you've been sober or three months!!!
kialafiction Congrats! Keep it up :)
kialafiction well done! keep going! you can do it xx
Courtney Thomson Thankyou!!💓
kialafiction wow wee congrats!x
You just 100% explained me. I'm so with you girl. I'm 16 days sober right now. Before that I was 8 days sober, and before that I was 32 days sober. You will most likely have hiccups along the way, but it will be so worth it. The first week is 100% the most difficult, after that when I reached the month mark I hadn't craved a drink for about two weeks. I wish I'd just stayed sober the whole time since then......
I'm oddly lucky in the fact that I'm chronically ill/disabled so I rarely get to actually "go out" and drink. I did all my drinking at home, alone, so it was mostly easy to hide. It became entirely a crutch for my pain relief and anxiety. But even from home I could be reckless. I'd end up talking to people on Facebook chat and revealing embarrassing things or saying things totally out of line. Or I'd post a status or tweet and get in arguments because it's something I normally wouldn't say. Then on those rare occasions I would go out.... my god, the shame the next day and the regret is absolutely palpable. The final straw though is that the last holiday I took with my mum I ruined due to my binge drinking for two weeks straight. That was last summer. She then passed away this year in May. That regret alone was enough to know I had to stop.
I'm here for you Lucy. If you ever need someone to talk to outside of everyone you know then please feel free to get in touch with me on twitter (@ witchybuns) or whatever. We've spoken via DM before + you were kind to me so I want to reach out with kindness to you.
Much love + light xo
Witchy Wellness I'm happy you're taking steps to improve. I'm so sorry about your mum, hiccups don't matter as you said and I think you're bloomin amazing!
Florence Orchard aw thank you Florence! It's so kind of you to reply to my comment with such lovely words ☺️ much love + light to you friend! 🙏🏻
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Witchy Wellness u are not alone. I have been sober for 19 months. try AA it is amazing!
Neal & Nicole Ploudre A
Brave video. Proud of you :) miss you pal, hope you're doing okay
Lucy this is so heavy and real. Thanks for sharing.
HI ASHHHHHH
also wow didnt expect to see you here
Also hi
Also I just watched your not live thingy I'm not sure what the name is
Also hi
I'll be sober now for 37 years tomorrow. I know it can be done. well done you. happy for you
Thank you for talking about this. My struggle with alcohol has been intrinsically linked with my mental health. I've made so many mistakes from drinking excessively...it's hard to come back from those especially because it's easy to put it down to alcohol when really, there's something else going on. I'm very similar with the inability to limit drinking to 1 or 2, I've had to go sober in order to try and heal my relationship with alcohol but I don't think it's safe for me to ever have it.
I can relate so much to the change in personality when drunk, blacking out and the intense guilt and regret the morning after :(
My mother was an alcoholic for the past few years and passed away in July. We never saw the signs. Alcoholics are not just people who stagger around and slur their words and sit in the pub all day. Alcoholics may seem perfectly fine. Alcoholism does not make sense to most people. People need support and need to know it's okay to speak about their problems.
Abbi Taylor
I am so, so sorry.
My dad passed away last February due to his alcoholism. Thinking of you, Abbi, and praying for healing in this time
I'm glad you made this video, I am the same age as you and had the same problems with alcohol consumption. I used to promise myself every week I'd quit but the uncontrollable urge isn't easy to repress, and mixing tonnes of alcohol with antidepressants was a huge mistake of mine. I've now been sober since January 1st 2016 and I don't regret it at all. It's not easy at all but it will be 100% worth it if you are determined!
+
emily b any tips on doing what you did? I'm trying but it's hard. Especially because my relationship ended yesterday because of my drinking.
Even though I'm 16 and technically still underage, all of my friends have been drinking heavily for a few years now, and that's the reason I've decided to be straight edge. I know I have an addictive personality, and because I've always been a little (aka a lot) insecure around people and I always want people to like me, I know that if I started drinking there's a high chance that something similar to this would happen to me. Also because of the supposed calming effects of alcohol as it is a depressant I know it would be so easy to use it constantly as a way to calm my anxiety, especially when I'm out in places with lots of people that would stress me out, so I really don't want to run that risk whatsoever. Alcohol can be a fun recreational drug that can be fun to drink in moderation, but the risk of it becoming an issue for me is too high for me to risk, and the potential negative side effects of that would be way too severe for me to risk for the sake of taking a substance I don't like anyway just because everyone else is and I want to fit in. You're so brave for making this Lucy, and the fact that you're aware of your problem and are working to make it right shows such great strength! I'm proud of you girl, keep going, if you slip up its okay, just focus on your little achievements along the way to keep you on track, and hopefully you'll be much healthier and happier for it! Much love ❤️
You and your friends shouldn't drink in the first place, there's a reason why there's a limit to drink
I think it was brave of you to post this, and I think youre taking a great attitude - although maybe it would be better not to 'do' drinking in the first place, thinking this way is a really mature way of acting - keep going! xx
Hey Lottie :) I am few years older than you, but just wanted to say I am exactly the same! and went/am still going through the same thing. As I have, I'm sure you will have experienced people not understanding why you don't drink. But you are so strong for identifying within yourself what is best for you. Keep at it, you're amazing xx
Hi Charlotte. I stopped drinking some 40 years ago when, as a sixteen year old going to parties with school friends and tipsy on cider, I found myself saying dumb things to girls (I love you) and having to feel embarrassed the next day. I, like you, recognised my addictive personality, I didn't like the taste of alcohol and I certainly didn't like its effect: All of which made the decision to not drink easy. What was slightly less easy was dealing with a pub society which then (late 1970's) didn't understand soft drinks on a night out. I might also say that it was a time when drink driving was socially acceptable and people told stories of and laughed about being too drunk to walk but driving home! Nevertheless I have actually received very little hassle for not drinking in all that time and I have never regretted not drinking.
If your choice is to not drink, don't be diverted by social pressure (if it comes). If you are confident in yourself about your decision, people will accept it. You really can enjoy yourself just as much as those that are drinking and you will NEVER say or do something that you need to blame on drink.
X
Hey Lucy! You are amazing, seriously. I've just stumbled upon your channel & I am so happy to have found you. Your content is original and you seem like such a great person. Thank you for talking about this very important subject that - as you said - nobody ever talks about. I couldn't have done it!
I'm about two months sober now, so far it's been hard, but I notice that it gets better and better with each day.
You've got this!
Ever curious: Michelle thank you!
Rebecca M thank you! I'm still doing alright.
You said to me on Tuesday night that you were going to be filming this and I could not be prouder of you for doing this! I know it's so difficult and getting over the things you told me on Tuesday are hard. You are incredibly brave for doing this!
+Katie Cumper 💕💕
I've been having so many problems with my housemates/two closest friends in the last few months because of this exact issue and I've never been able to talk to them about it or explain myself because I felt that they would assume I was just making it up to excuse myself from my shitty drunken behaviour. I've never felt so reassured after watching a video in my life, it has honestly helped me so much to know that this is a real issue that other people are dealing with and can relate to. When you descibred the feeling of self hatred that you experience the morning after and the anxiety after you blackout, I related so strongly. I'm considering showing this video to my housemates so that I can finally explain what's been going on and hopefully they'll understand and we can fix our relationship. Thank you so much for this amazing video, Lucy!
Eve Hamill I have the same problem also unfortunately. And the black outs make it worse. My boyfriend recently told me about something I said/did that hurt him that I couldn't remember doing. He didn't believe that I couldn't remember it... But then when I finally was able to convince him I really couldn't he said it was pathetic... It broke my heart. And really made me hate myself and feel so hopeless, like I couldn't fix the problem. Like Lucy everyone, including my bf, have told me that my suggestion of quitting alcohol is an overreaction. I don't know what to do....
Bathroom Jams: It sounds like people in your life think you're overreacting, that you don't have a problem, and at the same time you're seeing how you hurt your boyfriend when you were blacked out. All signs will never point in one direction, there will never be a voice that booms from the heavens to tell you to stop drinking. Your goal is to decide which direction most of the signs are pointing. Sometimes therapists can help you figure out where the signs are pointing and which ones you want to follow. I suggest finding a therapist who does motivational interviewing--the nice thing about that approach is that you call the shots, you decide what is best for you because you know yourself best. The therapist is there as a sounding board and to support you in whatever decision you make.
Bathroom Jams You must do what is right for you, not what others are saying is right for you. And it sounds like you know what YOU need to do. Take care 💜
Eve Hamill
this program has helped my friends father he recommends it give you personal support. pass it on.. tinyurl.com/h96tbeh
Thank you so much for making this video Lucy, it's so powerful and I know it'll help some of your viewers immensely.
Sending my love and strength to anybody who can relate to this xx
I love you and I am proud of you. Thank you for using your voice. I support you. x
Rosianna Halse Rojas glad to finally hear from someone who can't relate to their sober self because everyone seems to think that a drunk mind speaks a sober heart but that's not true
This was so brave & so eloquent. Like you said, it's hard to wrap your head around something you haven't experienced - you helped us do that and honestly I feel better equipped to at least try and understand and help where we can. Well done Lucy! x
So so much respect for you Lucy, this video is so powerful. Much love your way
Ahh love your videos Maisie!!
well done for uploading this, it takes a lot of courage to not only admit something like this but share your entire story with alcohol / relationship with it. a lot of this resonates with me, especially the turning into a different/awful/selfish person whilst drunk and drinking more than friends and having to hide that. i wouldn't go as far as to say i'm an alcoholic but you've reaffirmed the fact i do have a problem and need to work on it, so thank you! you'll have helped so many people with this video xxx
Hey Yasmin, I'm a journalist writing a piece for Stylist about friendships that have been negatively affected by alcohol and I'd love to speak to you about your experience (if you're comfortable!) If so, my email is in the about section on my page x
Your comment on your social circles loving alcohol hit home for me. I'm coming up for 1 year sober and finding things to do with friends that werent alcohol was tough in the beginning. Even now tbh.
you got this Jake ❤
Alcoholism is a very difficult topic if you've been affected by it. It's extremely personal no matter what side of the fence you're on. My cousin has been sober for 12 years and has a PHD, has gotten married, and started a family.
I don't understand personally, but nearly everyone in my family has alcoholism. I've seen the cycle and the destruction since I was born. But I'm not here to be negative. I just wanted to say you're incredibly brave to make this public & educational. I know it's cliche but taking the first step is so difficult, there isn't a proper word for it, but it's seriously important and things can only get better. Keep doing your best. If you slip up, find it in yourself to forgive yourself for it and don't give up. Overcoming an addiction will never be a cakewalk and no one can say your struggles aren't valid. But it's not impossible, and you're 100% on the right track.
You might have heard this already, but picking up a new (relatively harmless) habit can help, in example coffee, gum, or hard candies has been known to help fill the desire to drink (or what have you) with something else. This can be applied to any situation; wash a dish when you feel the urge. Take stock of your clean dishes and think about how you were able to overcome it and hey, the dishes are done. Set goals to keep yourself motivated even if you have a relapse. Again, nothing harmful. This isn't 100% guaranteed but it might ease the process, and I sincerely hope this is helpful to someone.
I promise you can do it. I'm proud of your courage and will to say that you need to address this despite the fact people around you tell you it's not a problem.
I'm literally going to do this with you. I've wanted to quit alcohol for years but I just couldn't, and now you gave me hope again. We can do this Lucy, I believe in us.
+Soleil L 💕
Dear Lucy,
Please consider finding a support group or an AA community. You don't have to go through withdraw and the road to sobriety alone. The rates of success in remaining sober while in a support group are so much higher than trying on your own.
+
Yes! I'm coming on one year sober and my 12 step program and many meetings a week have helped me stay sober when I never could before.
Hey Lucy. I think I suffer from a similar thing. I love drinking, I love feeling carefree. But for some reason when I drink I always do/say something that hurts someone I care about. Often I forget doing/saying these things the next day only to have someone address me about it. And when they do I've many a time been in disbelief. I can't relate to my drunk thoughts and actions when I'm sober. I don't agree with them. I refuse to identify with them. But I have to take responsibility. Because I did these things and sober me has to deal with the consequences. My s/o recently told me that my forgetting doing hurtful things is pathetic. That I was pathetic. And I feel pathetic. Thank you for this video Lucy.
You literally made me cry at the end. So many people told me when I suggested that maybe I should not drink alcohol anymore that it was silly and to just drink less. But I don't know if I can.. Like you said, once you have one a powerful urge takes over and makes you want more..
Bathroom Jams same
My friend just sent me this video and I as a 17 year old really appreciate this video and i'm so happy that iv'e realised my problem with alcohol in time before I do something that fucks up my life even more. Iv'e already destroyed a friendship of 10 years and I don't want to fuck up anymore. Thank you so much for making this video x
I think you're an incredibly brave young lady. Personally myself I love the taste of alcohol so I relate to that aspect. I have a glass or two of wine every evening to wind down and I'll spend a reasonable amount of money of a bottle because I enjoy it but I'm never drunk. I don't drink to get drunk, I drink because the alcohol I choose to drink tastes amazing. I'm hoping now that enjoying a nightcap isn't some kind of gateway to alcoholism....
I wish people would understand that alcoholism affects more than the drinker. It effects the people around them- alcohol creates abusers. The drinker MAY (not all) will abuse the people around them, mentally, physically, emotionally. So please if you are an alcoholic get help, it damages so many people. Thank you Lucy for making this video, I know this will help xxx
Also even at my age, I have such a strong WANT to drink but my birth dad was an extreme alcoholic- it runs in the family so for as long as possible I won't drink because I know I'll get, maybe not addicted but I won't want to stop?? I'm going to use all my will power not to because I know it's not right!
I don't want to tell you what to do and I actually really respect you for this comment. I just wanted to say that you probably can drink. If you understand the concequences of drinking and how to drink it you should be fine. Drinking safely will probably be better than simply denying it altogether. I don't know, I'm sure you will chose what's right but don't be worried if you want to have alcohol. You are strong and you will know what's right,
My mother is an alcoholic and got sober when I was 5, but knowing about her relationship with alcohol made the beginning of my relationship with alcohol toxic. I would feel guilty for having sips, feel disappointed in myself for having a drink, feel as though I had done terrible things simply because I had a hangover. Feel bad for having fun with my friends on a Friday in university, where I would have 2 or 3 drinks legally.
It pays to be cautious. It is good to know what problem drinking behaviours are like before you drink, and to know what could happen. That being said, despite alcoholism running in my family I can happily say I'm not an alcoholic, and even since moving to the alcohol driven culture of the UK I'm not even a problem drinker. Your fear makes perfect sense, but also know it is possible to have a healthy relationship with alcohol despite your history.
I can really empathize with your situation. Similarly, growing up, my dad was an alcoholic and the illness has been passed on for many generations. Fortunately, he parted with the excessive drinking about 7 years ago, but the damage has been done. Growing up with an alcoholic realllllllly messes with you. I'm now physically unable to be around people who consume alcohol; it makes me too uncomfortable. I'm also too frightened to drink because I'm so fearful that I will easily lose control. But, I'm sure this extreme avoidance isn't very healthy either. I hope you can find a happy medium where the consequences of growing up with an alcoholic don't affect your life. I wish you nothing but the best!
|-/
This was really enlightening to watch Lucy. Being a 16 year old who has never gotten drunk (had a few 4% ciders but thats about the peak aha) you see alcohol and being drunk glorified within social media and the media in general. Education within alcoholism and being drunk is limited and lots of people who never drink alcohol go for the first time at 18 and completely black out because they have no idea what they are doing. This must of been such a hard video for you to make but believe me this was sooo helpful, thank you xxxxxx
True, I think more should be done in college and school to ensure people are aware of alcohol and the consequences associated with it x
I could make a whole video about the glamourising of alcohol in the media
yes!! Please do, I think a video like that would be so helpful and interesting to watch. I find every video you make interesting to watch but I especially think your perspective of that would be a good one xxx
That would be fascinating...
Completely agree. I'm seventeen and have had much the same experience and though I doubt alcohol is ever going to be a problem for me (I'm generally not a huge fan of the taste), I know I have a very addictive personality and this video is so educational with regards to why you have to be *so* cautious with alcohol and substances like it. As a newly-graduated young adult I feel so fortunate to have been able to watch this video just as I'm about to head off into the world. Thank you so much for making it Lucy, I know it must have been incredibly difficult to film x
I've not had a single drop of alcohol for four years Lucy, it is possible! How incredibly courageous of you to make this video!!
Build up a strong group of friends that don't want to go out as much but also love a cozy night in, chats and all that.. I have had so many bad experiences that I decided I needed to not drink again and doing this for so long, I can agree that it IS really annoying how people will look at you weirdly when you won't drink..ever.. but it's also something people will admire you for, secretly, because they actually wouldn't mind stopping either.. alcohol is a terrible drug of today's society and is so well hidden that no one ever looks at it as dangerous. by speaking up about this you've done the first step! keep going x
my mom is almost 10 years sober. She went to rehab and AA and never regretted it. She is one of the most incredible people I know. You can do this. Don't do it alone. Find your reason to get sober and hold tight. Be kind to yourself. You are so loved. Stay strong, Lucy.
I'm a recovering addict and I really enjoyed the way you put this out there it's a really brave thing and you are an inspiration I'm 4 years sober and its one day at a time. thanks for trying not many care enough to make the effort😌
Brains of people with addiction or addictive tendencies are often wired differently and we just get addicted fast and can't control ourself there. Thats why its also running in families, like my granddad and my uncle that I both never met were adicted to alchol too and I was addicted to pot, because I liked the feeling, and my calming/sleeping pills (and to throwing up, wich I view as addiction too), luckily I had to go to a psyicharty for some time, so I stay away from alcohol and drugs... Thank you a lot for making this video!
and yes, alcoholism is a mental illness. - a mentally ill psychology student
Fresh Arche I think I have addictive tendencies which is one of the reasons I don't do drugs including alcohol. My brother and my father also have these tendencies and my father also has a cannabis addiction. I'm not a psychologist so can't really tell if I really am more likely to get addicted to things but I assume it because I tend to can't stop doing things more than other people do and this happens to all sorts of things since I was 12. Because of that assumption I'm really glad I don't have the desire to take any substances that can harm me easily like alcohol. I'm trying to keep it that way cause if you never tried something you don't know what you're missing out on.
Fresh Arche You hit that point perfectly and sometimes it's not we're easily addictive to everything its just we have a specific weakness
Mine was sex and coke but somehow weed and alcohol I could use occasionally and responsibly and never even think about going back once I knew I was nearing my limit
But sex just I hooked up with someone once and lost my virginity and after that I had to fuck anything that walked for awhile I was hooking up with this bi dude and his bi girlfriend basically
He introduced me to drugs like weed which when used right can be great and even a benefit its down right medical
Now when I found coke that I haven't had much but after the first time I KNEW I needed more and I could simply not experience that feeling enough in this lifetime
Luckily I've ended stuff with that guy and my current relationship is with someone who helps me stay off the bad shit and stay responsible with the other shit
as TMI as this is gonna get even though I'm in a relationship I don't have sex enough to say I'm addicted anymore and I never even think of cheating
Addiction is very real but a good support system can really change everything and that's what we forget is that it CAN be fixed
If I came back from cocaine and sex with every living human then you can do anything and everything
you were addicted to throwing up? do you mind explaining why?
Gizan Glyer
there is no why o.o like...do you want to hear my traumatic backstory on how I got into a vicious cycle of binging and throwing up? Yeah I know that its called bulimia, but I didn't wanted to lose weight, I was already thin. Its just a thing that I did to cope o.o
Could I please just add that if there is excessive alcohol intake on a regular or daily basis you need to see your GP because going cold turkey may not be an appropriate option because it can lead to serious withdrawal symptoms. You may need medications such as benzodiazepines to stop these. Good luck with your sobriety Lucy! Xx
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Eve Mee yes! This is so important! Withdrawal isn't just missing the alcohol but you could get really bad physical symptoms too. Also, Lucy, I don't regularly watch you but I really do wish you the best!
+
You are right in that going cold turkey can be dangerous in many cases, but benzodiazepines are among some of the most addictive prescription medications out there
Samantha diazapam is used frequently (at least in New Zealand) in the short term to treat the symptoms of alcohol withdrawal such as seizures. Some times they are necessary 😃
I'm so proud of you Lucy for having the strength to talk about this. I will be here to support you xxxxxx
my dad has had this problem since waaaay before i was born. the difference there though is that he doesn't care that he hurts people, and he doesn't have your will to get better. so i just want to say it's really great of you to have this desire to change, since so many people with this problem don't want to address it. you're going to be okay, you're so brave and you can do this.
I'm really happy that you talk also about the shadow parts of life with your most onest words and not making everithing small. You helped definetely many people with the same problems-because now they can say" Hey, I'm not alone struggling with the same thing".
My mum used to drink too much and would become someone else, so I relate to you Lucy. I could not be more proud of her to leave it behind her. Mum I love you and are proud of you ❤️ Lucy you too, making the effort to stop is the first step my dear x
I'm so proud of you for making this video, I don't know exactly what you're going through because I can't relate with alcoholism but I can relate in terms of self harming. I started three years ago about six months before I was diagnosed with depression and since it's become my own addiction, a curse that I genuinely can't control, it's the first thing I turn to when any tiny thing goes wrong in my life. "I kid myself that I have self-control to stop but I don't". It's so true. I couldn't have phrased it better myself. Thank you for making this video, it really helped me. And relapses are okay, and that's what I keep telling myself. Two weeks and one day clean, and proud of myself for it :) all the best for the future, Lucy xxxx
Emilia Rachael I used to self harm too in the exact same scenarios as you- it was simply easier than facing problems head on, a way to mask the pain without having to confront and deal with it. Tomorrow morning at 9:12am I will be 50 days clean. I promise you that it can get better- I replaced the emotional support of cutting with music, and the effect it has had has been staggering. I still have my bad days, like anyone, and I've been close to relapsing almost every day, but it can and will get easier, I promise you. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you (I'm @carcrashcharlie on Twitter)- you're not alone in this, okay? ❤️
Lottie Lollie this is possibly the nicest message I've ever received online, thank you so much! things have been difficult again recently but I've managed to hold on,and it is slowly starting to get better, and I'm so proud of you for making it to 50 days that's honestly insane! Xxx
i have family members who have problems with alcohol and this made everything a lot clearer to me, i'm so proud of you for making this video. stay safe Lucy xx
Thank you for this. My dad was an alcoholic and recently passed away because of his drinking. I so appreciate any chance I get to understand him better. Blessings as you go on this brave and important journey
Hey Lucy, thanks for this video. It really hit me hard as my ex boyfriend was similar - he stated at Uni and his family drink a lot, but he was SUCH a different person. I couldnt get my head around how someone could be so perfect and amazing and then the minute he had a drink, he was an aggressive, horrendous, vile monster towards me. It's so crazy to her someone else discussing this. Well done you for talking about this. You're amazing x
congrats on one week :). making this must've been scary, and I really value your honesty and bravery. you're not alone. we've all got your back.
P.S. I really, really relate to emotional hangovers. They're some of the worst emotional states I've ever, ever experienced. I said it before, but you are so not alone!
you are not alone in this! if you slip, forgive yourself, remember why you are doing this, and start again.
Connor Manning- AConMann is also a sober UA-camr and talks about his experiences with alcoholism from time to time- Have you heard of him?
Anyway, thank you for sharing Lucy. Stay strong, we're here for you xx
+The Tweeky Gang Connor is an angel
The Tweeky Gang He just made a video response to this too!
My father is an alcoholic, and has been done and off sobriety. Whenever I would tell friends they would automatically assume that he was a bad person, but when he didn't drink he was such a wonderful and empathetic man.
I have been sober for 8 months. I will turn 50 years old this week and this is my first successful attempt at sobriety. I write about my experience on my Facebook page for the same reason you shared this. If it helps one person, it is worth it. I am sure you have helped so many with this video. I am sorry I just discovered you today, but I am excited to see your other videos.
I'm gonna be 2 years clean on Dec 6th. Took me several attempts and a shit lot of struggle to get where I am today but it's all so worth it. You can do it girl, props to you for speaking up and raising awareness. We're all in this together.
It's really refreshing to hear someone talk about this. You're so brave!
This is so incredible...I don't even know what to say. Thank you for talking about this; it's the first time I've ever seen a video about alcoholism and I think it really is something that needs to be more talked-about. Wishing you the best of luck down the road ;)
yes lucy! I havent drunk for over two and a half years now, since I was 17(!!!!!) but honestly it was such a good decision and now not drinking is easy xxxx
honestly I relate so much, I have NEVER in my life just had one drink
AND THE BLACKING OUT OMG
You are so strong. I believe in you.
I've grown up around alcoholism my entire life. My uncle has lost everyone except maybe my mum and one or two other friends. Addiction lies in my blood and this is a legitimate fear of mine.
I hope you can overcome this and I promise to love and support you through your journey whatever happens
Amazing. Well said Lucy.
I'm 17 (yes I know, I'm young) and had started drinking when I was 14. I would drink everyday, 3-4 shots of vodka on a school night, god only knows how much on a weekend, and I had no idea I had a problem. I developed Lupus (coincidently, and my liver has been thankfully unaffected) and so had to stop drinking due to the meds I was on. I didn't really give stopping a second thought as I had no idea I had a problem, but after only 3 days ended up in hospital due to the withdrawal symptoms. It's been 4 very hard months since my last drink but these past few weeks I've not had cravings as much. Thank you for sharing your story and helping to get rid of the stigma.
I don't drink at all (yet to be 18) but it is just nice to hear you talking about things like this and im proud of you for doing what you need to do to make yourself a better and healthier person.
No one talks about it because, unfortunately, alcohol consumption is so normalized, not to mention culturally significant for most people. I want you to know that I can relate to this and that I'm appreciative that you were brave enough to put this message out there.
Sending love to you. I'm proud of you for being so open and I thank you for talking about this.
I appreciate your honesty and transparency here. I'm so sorry that it's something that you struggle with alcohol, it's definitely something huge. The fact that you are aware that it is something in your life that you need to change is so huge. You are addressing the problem that is in your life and you are striving to move forward. I don't struggle with alcohol, but I do struggle with other things in my life. Here's to moving forward and making good decisions, Lucy. You go girl!
You're brave. You're powerful. You're strong and you'll get through this.
so I don't drink.
I stopped because I knew I had too.
I've dealt with depression and anxiety for years.
one night. I had a couple drinks. it didn't help, it made my depression worse.
it scared me to think that's the road I could go down.
so I stopped.
it wasn't easy, I still have issues with family acceptance that I don't drink.
I know its not necessarily the same but you've now accepted the issue of alcohol and you're now dealing with it.
That's already a massive step.
wishing anyone and Lucy all the best with making steps forward to overcome this.
I know I'm not an alcoholic because I don't rely on it and I can go sober for a fairly long time. But I am very easily pressured and I'm a bad drunk. Your stories about how you act when you're drunk resonate with me, it's like I turn into a completely different person. I've said some awful things and lost some good people in my life because of it. It definitely stemmed from self-esteem issues, I figured alcohol would make me fun and confident, but it didn't. I'm lucky that I can choose to not drink and I really hope you can find help and peace with yourself. I do emphasise with some aspects but obviously I can't know how your experience feels. Just know there are people who care about you and you know yourself well enough to know you need to quit. We've got your back Lucy, good luck
Proud of you for speaking upon this. You being able to recognize the problem before it got worse is so strong of you and admirable. Sending you positivity on your journey of sobriety. Also, you are not alone and I too recognized a lot of the same effects of drinking alcohol in my own life in order to relieve my anxiety as a downward slope to something horrible and I am happy to continue my sobriety even if others think I don't have a problem. :)
I think you are really brave for uploading this! I've seen first hand what alcoholism can do to a person and a family so I wish you all the best! Stay strong xxx
This was me. I don't drink anymore because I become this narcissistic, self centred, selfish awful person. I cheated on boyfriends, would make a total fool of myself, would spend SO much money and was so nasty. The first time I had a night with my friends and woke up the next day without that awful knot in my stomach and I didn't have to worry about what I'd done and who I'd upset was AMAZING. It's worth it I promise. Take it step by step and talk about it, people will understand. If you need anything just ask xxx
Wow Lucy. What an amazing video and message! I am so impressed! I never had this problem, but I have realised quite early on that I really dislike how alcohol changes people.
People say alcohol can bring the real you out (because you are much braver and not shy, etc) and I think this is in NO WAY the truth.
We have to work on being confident and 100% ourselves when sober. Alcohol is an addictive drug, and getting drunk should not be the only way or even a legitimate option on ''how to have fun''. I have had family members die due to alcoholism and I truly believe that some people have had their problems stemmed from uni or even high school. I had my fun too and I get that it sorta belongs to the culture...but I also think it is absolutely gone way over board.
So so inspiring Lucy. YOU CAN DO THIS
Until I watched this video I had stereotyped "drunkeds" as these 50 yr old men with beer bellies who go down to the pub and drink tons being aware that they need to stop but they dont. This has opened my mind to a whole new perspective as you are someone I admire. I hope with the support of your friend and family you can fight this. i love you x
(i meants "friends" not friend, Im aware you have more than one teehee)
***** I'm under the legal drinking age. So i'm not that experienced with alcohol (even though it tastes good)
***** Ok cool, I guess i just don't have a very good perspective on the matter. Thanks for broadening my views.
Ayanna Robinson You just described my father.
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ 😂😂
the strength you used to share this story with us is a type of strength i have yet to obtain. truly inspirational.
My mom is a chronic drinker. She is drinking every night, one of my earliest memories is when I was very little and walked into the kitchen seeing her passed out, snorting like a pig with the empty whiskey (or whatever) bottle in her hand. That picture was often present in my life as I was growing up (and still is). Now I pretend it doesn't bother me because the addiction has completely taken over her and I feel helpless. I used to play it mad at her or not talk to her until she apologizes and promises to stop. Thousands of unkept promises and yet I still thought that every time was different. I often check if she's still breathing while asleep and the thought that someday I won't see her chest rise beneath the blankets terrifies me.
schizo witch fuck... that's horrible...
I'm very proud of you for writing this! Maybe you already have, if not, talking to someone close or to a stranger (on a helpline or something) would maybe be a good option? My father (who also has an alcohol problem) is in therapy now and it helps a lot. I wish you all the best!!
Alanon is somewhere you can get amazing help
schizo witch so sad
Meg X wrong diagnosis!
"I kid myself that I have the self-control to stop but I don't" Damn that hit me hard. This is what I do when it comes to eating. Eat healthy throughout the day, tell myself I can have a couple sweets and then stop and be fine, but then I spend the next 5 hours of non stop binging. I feel SO confident that I can control it, but as soon as I start, I feel like I can't, and then u have that lovely cycle of self hatred
I've been thinking about this topic a lot recently. This is such a hard video to make but I'm really proud of you for doing it. I'm sure you'll have enough willpower to fight it. You have all my support, if you ever need to talk or get distracted, here I am. Stay strong, I'm sure you'll make it
Thank you for being vulnerable and making this video, Lucy. It was very informative. My dad was an alcoholic and I've mostly stayed away from the stuff because I know that alcoholism is biologically inherited. I've always figured that most people who turn to alcohol in an unhealthy way used it as a crutch. Like maybe they were trying to cope with something traumatic that happened or they were self treating an undiagnosed mental illness. I'm sure that's the case with many people, but this shows there are other factors that could lead to alcoholism.
And you're right that there is a stereotype of what an alcoholic looks like. They aren't all middle aged men and they can be young adults in their early twenties. I think that it's really important that we understand that anyone, of any background or age group, can have a problem. Addiction doesn't look the same for every person struggling with it.
I've just found this video. I know I'm a year late and you probably won't see it but I just wanted to thankyou for posting this. My diagnosis "binge drinker" has been recently reviewed, and after 3 difficult months I can finally say that I feel good. Although I'm still struggling with smoking cigarettes and weed its been a huge step forward for me. Thankyou for sharing your story. Much of what you described was strikingly simmilar to what I had experienced. I hope you are successful in your journey, stay strong!
Thank you for making this video. I honestly think alcoholism is so more widespread than it seems because its swept under the rug so often. But thank you for being so vulnerable and honest and making a video that can help others. I genuinely wish you the best!
im 21 and have never drunk alcohol... sometimes i feel weird
Why what country do you live in if you don't mind me asking?
Tanisha Hillary I'm 22 and I don't like alcohol and the smell makes me feel physically sick
its not about you Tanisha gosshhhh
AllThatJazz everyone in the comment section discuss alcohol and you decided to attack me... Kay. Btw youre not funny💩
Tanisha Hillary I'm 22 and I don't like it at all it's disgusting to me. I loved the bravery of this video
"There is no one! No one is talking about this." This part of the video is exactly why I am so greatful you are doing this. Particularly cause I myself am 25 days sober today.
There is so much I relate to in this video. I also struggle to really apply the term alcoholic to myself, at least for now. There really is this misconseption that you have to be on the brink of homelesness to be an alcoholic. I can easily go without a drink for months, so I can't be an alcoholic right?! It doesn't matter that if I do get a drink I can't stop. Or that at times the graving is so massive I can't even go and buy groceries cause I will tempted by the rows and rows of hard alcohol (a new problem i faced since moving to uk last september. at my home country alcohol, besides light beer, is only sold at government owned®ulated stores, easy to avoid). There clearly is a problem. And when I drink I get withdrawn and depressed, and that depression lasts for up to two week. Clearly my brain is not fit for drinking. Whether I am an alcoholic or not I guess is besides the point.
But for now, I am not drinking. Like you said, you are not promising to never drink again, neither am I. I guess that would be setting yourself up to a failure. All I can do is say I won't drink today. And hope that tomorrow I will be just as strong to make and keep the same promise.
I just wanna thank you for your bravery. We really need to talk about this more honestly. This is going to help a lot of people, and at least it has helped me!
Oh, chum 💕 you're great and you've got this!!!
I relate so so much to everything you've said and it warms my heart so much to see a young woman work to break the stigma because I so often feel like I'm alone in my demographic. I highly recommend a book called "Drinking, A Love Story." The author is a female and young professional so the perspective is particularly relatable. I learned so much from her story. And I also want to express that sobriety is so much harder, to nearly impossible, in isolation or without help. So I would really strongly encourage you to seek out AA, support groups, therapy, etc. to get support and solidarity with sobriety. I am SO proud of you and so grateful for you. Keep up the good work sistah, you got this. Xoxo
You should feel proud of yourself for recognizing that you have a problem and working towards fixing it!
You are so strong Lucy. This is such an incredible video to have made, it was so eloquently put. We all have our demons and food is my mental illness too. You couldn't tell me to just have one sandwich at the UA-cam space! I am here if you ever want to grab some tea
As someone with alcoholic family members. I'm glad you're trying to stop now rather than at age 50 with 2 or 3 ex wives/husband's and 4 kids
I relate to this a lot! My dad is affected by this too, my whole life I've watched him have one drink and realise that he can't just have one or two, it's like an uncontrollable force that comes upon him till he's hammered. And he can be really unkind to family n friends in his drunk state, it's not cool. I had no idea a young girl like you and me could be affected by this! Thanks for sharing. I also have an impulse control disorder called trichotillomania where I have an insane urge to pull my eyebrow hair out (weird I know) and every year it's my resolution to stop the habit but it's so powerful I don't think I'll ever be able to stop pulling...
This was amazing. Good luck on your journey. My husband had the same problem, when he drank he couldn't stop and he became a different person. He has been sober for 7 years now. He still has friends that have known him forever that ask him to have just one. Just stay strong.
I dated a guy when I was 20 that was an alcoholic and it hurt me everyday that I was with him. Still to this day, I pray he got help. I thank you so much for trying. It's really admirable.
I am 15, I was on the verge of starting to get the symptoms you mentioned in the video, i stopped immediately, never ever will sip alcohol again. I feel dumb and regretful
You're not dumb at all, you're very smart for recognizing this so soon.
You're not dumb at all, you're very smart for recognizing this so soon.
Great choice! You have your whole life ahead of you, and it will be so much better without alcohol mucking it up.
It's really admirable that someone as young as you was able to identify a problem that many adults refuse to recognize. You should be proud of yourself.
From the age of 17-18 I was 100% an alcoholic, but I was so young I refused to believe I was, once I finally realised I had a problem I was able to fix it, i wish teens and young adults realised this more often.
I'm writing and deleting, writing and deleting, and I only now realise how brave this video is... No, I don't have an alcohol problem, I am straight edge, however I used to drink in high school (never more than one cup of anything), but when I got to college I stopped... Mostly thanks to people who I hang out with, because when I was in hs literally everyone was getting wasted and I was often called out as "the boring girl that doesn't drink". Plus they've tried to get me wasted soooo many times (but failed miserably because I am stubborn as hell and also have no general desire to fit in). When I got to college, I found people who also didn't like alcohol, and we have most amazing fun friendships ever! However, I don't think I ever told anyone why I don't drink... and it's because my dad was an alcoholic, and apparently, genetically, alcohol makes my family aggressive. I could, after just one drink, feel aggression building up in me. And guess what?! I don't need that bullshit. Sorry, I'm rambling, I guess I was just trying to say:
1. People react to alcohol differently.
2. Surround yourself with people that think it's cool that you don't drink.
3. IT WILL NOT MAKE YOU BORING (I honestly feel sorry for people who are only happy when drunk).
4. Please treat it like an addiction, because it is one. You have to cut out alcohol COMPLETELY otherwise it won't work.
5. If you ever need to talk to someone on why being sober is cool feel free to talk to me (this goes for anyone reading this)
LITERALLY this is soooooooo good. I have friends who have been through alcoholics anon and really benefitted. I have been at events when AA is being set up and an entire cross section of people walked through the doors. I have alcoholism in my family (not direct) and have chosen to be tt for a variety of reasons but the obvious included. I've seen friends at uni drinking and seen people drinking 'in a different way' as you say - this is true and is so so so valuable to be talked about literally thank you so much for your bravery.
I come from a family of recovering alcoholics. My partner is also a recovering alcoholic and when he was younger people told him he was fine and "everyone feels that way sometimes." I don't drink out of support for him and my family. It's so great to hear your experiences! Thanks for sharing! Love and support!
After watching the full video I just want to add that almost everything you described is EXACTLY what my partner went through. He's a musician so a lot of the events he has to go to have alcohol as well. One of the things that helped him most was looking up the science behind alcohol addiction. It helped him to know what to expect and to not blame himself for his symptoms. He has told me many times that every day gets easier. The hardest period was those first few days and weeks. I hope it gets better for you and I'm so glad you're on your recovery journey.
I watched this video when it came out two years ago - and I have come back after making some huge mistakes in my life while drinking, drinking way too much, getting black out drunk every time I go out and forget everything that happened. I also watched your video "when you've messed up" again. And I really relate to what you're saying apart from the Monster coming out. For me it's more that I like myself more usually when I'm drunk - more outgoing, funnier, meeting people more easily etc. But recently I've started to become more angry while drunk and hurt myself hitting walls and stuffs. I've most recently basically destroyed a friendship - although I can't push everything that happened on my drunk self. Alcohol didn't make me do it - it just happened more easily that way, but would have happened anyway.
I am now trying to control how much I drink. I don't want to go sober completely, but limit myself to three drinks a night. Which can also be enough depending on the drink and day.
It's just really really scary to acknowledge there is a problem in the way I drink.
I hope you will manage to get it under control and get better! I have friends in my life in similar situations to you who haven't realized they have a problem, and I'm proud of you for starting to acknowledge this and take steps to improve this.
Hey Anna, I'm a journalist writing a piece for Stylist about friendships that have been negatively affected by alcohol and I'd love to speak to you about your experience (if you're comfortable!) If so, my email is in the about section on my page x
0:10- "hi Lucy" (traditional AA response)
I am so proud of you for making this video. I have no doubt that you will help so many people by sharing your story. x
I'm 18 and just started university, and this video made me recognize and actually admit to myself that I have a problem. I've been drinking since I was 15 and have always kind of worried that that was the case, but I related to legitimately everything you said. I essentially ruined one of my closest relationships this year because of drinking and "turning into an entirely different person" when I black out. Thank you so much, I cannot even express how much this video meant to me.
Well done for being so brave and talking about this. I feel guilty for my complete lack of awareness about alcoholism and am so glad you made this. Hopefully if i ever meet someone in my life with these issues i can show understand for what they are going through and treat them with empathy and love, not brush what they say off, or be unsympathetic. Good luck with being sober, and don't forget to reward yourself in other ways! :) x
My mom's an alcoholic, but she doesn't want to admit it, so she refuses to find help. I'm honestly scared something might happen to her
my mother is/was also an alcoholic. i know exactly how you feel because the habit is so unhealthy. unfortunately it's very hard to get an alcoholic to quit or anything because its mostly down to the person who has the problem and no matter what you do it is their problem and it is mostly down to them and their decisions. It's horrible because it makes you feel torn between this kind of love and hate attitude. The most you can do for your mother is be there for her - if she turns to alcohol when shes down, or trying to fill some kind of void, then talk to her and try and get out of her what she may be hiding inside. My mother was drinking a lot because she was very depressed about debt, guilt, etc and when we talked it out together and I asked her questions (almost like a councellor would) it really helped her, and although she still drinks today (because I, and you, have little control over what someone else decides to do) she is a lot better because she's not hiding all these pent up emotions all the time. Just be a friend to your mom, be there for her, let her know that she is amazing without the alcohol. Alcoholics can be selfish, manipulative, and lie a lot, so its hard. But try to remember its not her, its the addiction x
J'zargo From Elsweyr she hasn’t woken up yet everyone takes time to realise it took me 2 years