Leo's Worst Bad Trips - Psychedelics Gone Wrong
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- Опубліковано 29 сер 2024
- Stories and explanations of my worst "bad trips" from over 150 psychedelic trips across a dozen different substances. What creates bad trips and how to handle them.
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Disclaimer: Some of the advice provided in these videos could be dangerous to your psychological or physical well-being if applied carelessly. By listening to & applying this advice you agree to take 100% responsibility for all consequences. You agree to waive any legal recourse against Actualized LLC, Leo Gura, and Actualized.org staff. This is not medical or psycho-therapeutic advice. Leo is not a licensed therapist.
Warning: Spiritual work is inherently risky and dangerous if misapplied or misunderstood. Actualized.org teachings are not suitable for people with serious mental disorders such as: suicidal depression, schizophrenia, psychosis, bipolar, drug addiction, or other psychiatric or medical conditions. Leo's teachings assume you have a stable mind and life. If your mind is dysfunctional or ungrounded, these teachings may lead to a deterioration of your condition and even suicide if misapplied. Self-help and spirituality are not substitutes for professional treatment for such conditions. If spiritual work is causing your life to unravel in unhealthy ways, discontinue the work until your mind has stabilized and you are safe. Actualized.org teachings are very advanced and can easily be misunderstood and misapplied. Nothing Leo teaches ever promotes physical self-harm. Any time Leo talks about “facing one’s death” he is NOT talking about suicide or physically harming your body, but rather ego-death and spiritual awakening. Never confuse these two things.
Warning: Psychedelics are inherently risky and dangerous. Only use psychedelics if you are willing to take 100% responsibility for the consequences. Do not take psychedelics if you are too young, too immature, on mind-altering medication, or if you have a mental disorder. By listening to Leo you agree that Actualized.org is not responsible if you misuse psychedelics and injure yourself or others. If you decide to use psychedelics you must exercise extreme caution and carefully follow safety protocols. Leo’s use of psychedelics is always done with extreme caution and attention to safety. Treat psychedelics like a loaded gun. Never use psychedelics chronically. Never take psychedelics in high doses. Psychedelics will not effortlessly solve your deep psychological problems. The less grounded your mind is, the more selfish you are, the harsher psychedelics will be on you. Psychedelics can create deep existential crises. Do not take psychedelics unless you love the idea of deconstructing your mind and reality.
Ah yes, this’ll make a fine bedtime story.
A weeks worth of bedtime stories as I fall asleep 15 minutes and and have to rewind the next night. But then experience deja vu as part of me remembers things past where I fell asleep.
Fell asleep on one of his vids and in my dream he was in front of me and wouldn’t shut up but I was still amused lol
@@pkthunder7008 ^^^this
Hahahaha I was thinking this is not the video to watch while I've got anxiety 😂😂
Haha i use leos videos to go to sleep
Leo: "I m treating psychodelics with caution and take them carefully"
also Leo: "Lets do 30 days of dmt in a row"
hahahhaha
Ikr. I love this man but he's also so hypocritically ridiculous at times it's hilariously ironic.
@@Newuxtreme i don't like this man because he's so ridiculously hypocritic
when i was doing my 30 day 5 meow dmt retreat,
and you do whatever you want, and you should bring constructive criticism instead to criticize
@@NewuxtremeI hope that in your life you have such a degree of authenticity, and to be honest I don't think so.
It Was At This Moment Leo Knew... He Fucked Up
I had one horrible horrifying enlightening trip. And took it so seriously that I never stopped studying science.
Found out that all science is completely wrong too. And ever since that, I dont trip bad. Made me realize that bad trips are truths you don't understand.
Deep stuff about psychosis and awakening.
its true massive resistance to the truth equals psychosis
Very true
YEA welcome back from delusion bro. Everyone knows science is horseshit, everything it talks about is literal bullshit. Consciousness is King. Consciousness is Truth. Consciousness is God. Consciousness is the Absolute Objective Reality. Non-duality is the Truth of Consciousness. The wise who knows this and is conscious of it, basks in ever-present joy and bliss, bliss more powerful than love itself.
@@aed1905 yes all this is true.
350ug of LSD , first time tripping, gave me psychosis (ran naked in public),then a bad trip and an infinite loop and ended with a complete ego death + self-god-realization. all in one
What is an ego death can you elaborate?
@@sparkyharrison4585 you become aware that you are not the thoughts in your head or even your body, and that the idea of yourself as a person is essentially a fiction. You realise your true essence - Consciousness.
@@sparkyharrison4585 you can feel all the energy of the cosmos as one enrgy and it becomes who you are. you no longer indetify with the human body/mind
@moham yeah knowing the truth is priceless,i got there through disturbing scenarios tho, during the psychosis i though i was in the afterlife and ended up assaulting people...then those people choked me because they thought i was nuts, ended up held in the ground for some time and thats when ego death happened as i thought i will be sacrificed and at a moment i completly surrendered myself and body and then it happened.
@moham no, irresponsible use of psychedelics, giving the drug a bad name
This is going to be good
Or really bad!!!
Hahahhaa indeed
Im a fellow Indian engineer, DMT?😀
Nah I’m playin it’s almost no simp November i gotta prepare
I’ve had some bad trips years ago ( in the 60’s and 70’s). But they taught me so much. I’m thankful for them. I also had many excellent trips, which formed my life. They can be, if used properly, extremely mind-expanding, as you know, Leo …
@Conscious Corey Thanks ❣️
I never done DMT,
ALL i had was mushrooms, they gave me exactly what i need. I never really had really bad trips, they gave me Crystal clear vision, they showed me we are one, this world, this body nothing but bubbles over the ocean. Oneness is all there is, if you know we are one, and the oneness is the so called fullness and emptiness all together, you just drop all searchings, you even drop yourself, you are in awe for no reason.
@Max Payne No
@Max Payne That is very interesting.
That's basically what enlightenment is when established: empty but full to the brim with infinitude potentiality.
Obv psychs are only a glimpse.
A high enough dose of mushrooms is very similar to DMT
@Max Payne well I mean not everything that’s natural is good and not everything synthesized by humans are good. There are something’s that are good and somethings that aren’t. LSD is one of the better things that humans synthesized.
Nobody questions how he gets all these drugs? Lmao
*_«Whatever arises, love that»_*
~ Matt Kahn
A lesson tripping taught me is that you can’t go into a trip with an intent that lacks depth, meaning and reason. For example, I went into my second trip thinking that I would focus the whole time on my future but I didn’t really make it clear WHY I was tripping to myself and what about my future I wanted to assess on the trip. I assumed “I’ll just figure it out in the trip. The trip will expand upon this on its own.” But that’s not a clear intent so the trip turned into a crazy mess because I wasn’t clear of what I wanted out of the trip, I just wanted to trip.
i dont need to a trip. kinda relate to this. my life right now is aimless its terrifying when you dont have anything to live for
how would you set your intent and what ended up being a good thought?
@@shdhdjdjsbf2789 it's not about being 'good' or 'bad' it's about being a little bit more clear with why you want to trip in the first place and not some vague "boat" that you will send your mind to go off on
Its perfectly fine going into a trip with a vague intent. Or Even no intent. You just need to have the side intent of welcoming whatever comes as a part of you and surrender to it. No expectations.
Good video. Just a note on Salvia: Salvia gets a bad rap because IMO it is used incorrectly. It has been used traditionally for hundreds of years by the Mazatec, ididenous people in Oaxaca Mexico. There are several ways of ingesting but one of the common ones is making a kind of paste with fresh leaves (called quid) - the paste is not active if swallowed so you have to chew it in your mouth for 20-30 minutes (it is active sublingually, but not orally). I can assure you, Mazatec shaman would never have given "100x leaf extract" to their own people.
If one wants to experience Salvia in a manner similar to traditional use there are various tinctures available for purchase - the one I tried many years back was called "Sage Goddess Emerald Essence". It's a green liquid you have to keep in your mouth without swallowing. I realize this is inconvenient but the benefit is, as the experience gradually comes on, you can spit it out once you reach the desired level of intensity. Doing Salvia this way is not dangerous and can lead to very deep experiences.
I appreciate you saying all of that but f*** salvia lol. Each time I’ve come down from salvia I’m like “what the hell was the point of doing that” lol
@@amaziahyaohsharal9840 yeah because you got blasted on fortified extract. Doing it that way has traumatized a lot of people.
@@amaziahyaohsharal9840 hence you ingested it incorrectly.
@@scalperbot wasn’t traumatized, it just did not feel like it could have helped me in any way lol
I smoked Salvia, felt the trip coming on (my spirit leaving my body), was frighten n stopped the trip from happening. Guess I wasn't ready :(
I started tripping with shrooms in Dec. 2020 and tripped 25 times until April 2021...I usually took around a gram to expand consciousness but with 2.3g I started loosing my ego so hard I saw the same visuals with close eyes and with open eyes so I could not hide..felt like it was forcing itself on me like you said...and only once experienced a bad trip where all I could feel was fear and negative feelings I was trying to pint point where it was but could not find it...then I cuddled in bed by myself in a fetus position and called upon my ancestors to help somehow and I feel a cold breeze -, I felt them and the bad trip was over...
Oh no that sounds scary!
Looks like you opened your 3rd eye at that moment. Sometimes just between a state of slumbers I do see the same visual with open and closed eyes.
I remember taking 100 ug 1P-LSD. It was the first time taking 100. My friend who was trip sitting me was saying S P A C E... again and and again and from a light giggle i started laughing so hysterically and from all the tears dripping from my eyes, my laugh turned to a cry... Just crying my eyes out. After 10-15 secs im thinking I have to snap out of this because at that point my heart was racing and i couldn't take a breath. So i leave my room, go to the garden and all of sudden everything calms down. And im standing there, my eyes all red and watery watching the roses and flowers flow in the wind (it was a bit windy). And this memory is one of my favorites, watching the rose buds dancing in the wind so calmly felt like they were alive. I could say I felt God, the bonding we all have with everything and it's up to our consciousness to think and feel like that. Absolute bliss I tell you.
Thank you for spreading awareness on how to be conscious and cautious about this. It's all about knowing you are all in 🍄
Salvia. By far the most bizarre experience ever. 5 years later still shocked by how crazy it is and think about it every day. Forgetting your biographical details, that you’re on a planet called earth, that there’s even a difference between nothing and something. And the unbelievable sinister and maniacal vibe hanging in the air. In 5 minutes, I felt the equivalent of living a thousand different lives over a thousand years and there’s nothing telling me that’s not what happened. No hope that I would ever return to a human state because I didn’t know what a human was. Blew my bad trips on acid out the water. However, the amount of gratitude you have for the stability of the sober mind is amazing and long lasting after such trip.
Oh my gosh, I've spent a month obsessively scouring the internet to see if anyone out there had experienced the trip harrowing trip I had. What you've said feels exactly it. Ive read countless trip reports and none seemed quite the same as what happened to me. Though mine was via DMT. It's weirdly a relief to feel it's not just my mind that went there. I'm only a month down the line from the trip, I'm still feeling incredibly delicate and just not quite right, but a whole lot less terrified than the first 2 weeks, and I'm profoundly grateful for that. Like you said, a stable mind is such a wonderful thing, I hope I never ever take it for granted.
I got traumatized 2yrs ago on 200ug lsd in a tent. I sat in meditation for maybe 60 minutes until I suddenly believed I had died. It felt as a out of body experience where I saw my tent and my friend burned to death. Then I freaked out in person and started to shake him (because I thought he was dead) then he suddenly woke up from sleep. So for the rest of the trip I forced myself to be distracted to avoid the thought of the fire, but everytime I did distract myself - the thing distracting me started to go in flames. So I felt I became insane and started drawing crazy shit etc. I did not feel safe. Moral of story is to have a good setting. I had previously never slept in a tent or in nature before.
Yeah LSD is some HEAVY shit. Didnt had a bad trip but wont take it again. Shit is powerful beyond words.
@Max Payne We are talking about LSD here, can't compare with shrooms.
"Bad trips make bad sex seem like no problem" - Terence McKenna
What the fuck.. i have to admit it has to be one of the worst quotes of Terence if it's even a real one..
@@iamlight9198 I dont even think it's real and it dosen't make any sense lol. There are more important things than "bad sex".
@@dcktater7847 Yeah
@@2000abubaker Yeah
Okay frau grünberger 👍
Salvia was the first psychedelic I ever tried, so I smoked it recklessly. After realizing where I was, who I was with and the lack of supervision and safety measures in place, I’m lucky to be alive. Experience wise, I have only every had amazing trips on it. The visuals took over everything, there was only visuals. Lost complete sensation in my body. Laughing the whole time. My friends that took it with me never had a great experience. It made one friend extremely aggressive. It’s a very dangerous drug. Again, glad I survived given my lack of respect for it again and again.
I had 13 bad trips on ayahuasca. 7 years later, I am still terribly traumatized.
Really
@@mfungiYes.
@@soprotivleniye7620i would like to hear the bad trip and why it still affects you!
Was it like 13 consecutively all bad? Like you just kept hoping maybe next time will be better?
@@trevorherbertson7281 It was 4 bad ones, then a good one, then 9 months later 5 bad ones, then 3 years later 4 bad ones. Yes, I thought that in order to break to the light I had to break through the darkness. Unfortunately, that did not happen.
I have a great appreciation for all the work you've done for truth, Leo
Fr
I just love how courageous you are, in both life and how you share it with others.
It's truly fascinating to listen to in a world with so many ruled by ego.
Thanks for being you, and sharing it with us!
My out of the body experience felt very real after work related accident.
I got Ketamine injection at hospital.
I have seen myself laying on surgen table during procedure from bird eye view.
My true form was levitating above in some kind of white energy.
Honestly I thought so I am dead but same time I felt very safe and happy because there wasn't suffering or the pain in process.
It felt peaceful and timeless.
After surgery as they were moving my body to my room, I started throwing up and I came back to my senses. 😀 😅😉
The worst one I ever had was believing that life was just a dream and that I had "woken up" to that fact, and once I woke up to it I was certain that the "dream" would be over because I was going to be hacked to death by some psychopath. This actually happened on two occasions. It was a solipsistic nightmare.
Were you hacked to death by some psychopath on two occasions?
yes! I had an extremely bad trip but felt like I had gained so much wisdom from it. Learned so much about my life and myself from it.
My first time I did shrooms I did it in a horrible way I took 8 grams and was drunk and wasn't around the right people, the first 30 minutes was crazy visuals and sound where crazy then slowly it got so intense I lost touch with reality, and everything was looping people and events where just repeating themselves completely forgot I took shrooms forgot where I was what I was doing felt like a dream how you forget your dreaming, anyways a few hours later I came back to reality in a bathtub with people laughing at me I was told I was pissing my pants and was doing strange things and had a weird look on my face and wasn't responsive, I came back completely shocked felt like days went by but it was just 5 hours, and now looking back I realized how foolish the setup was and want to do them again but not in a stupid way
U went to the gym and tried to bench 400 on your first day.
Holy fuck I consider that a lucky outcome considering such a disastrous dosage and setting
Wow 🥺 lucky you for having your Friends around
This comment made me laugh 😆
@@dominique928 yea looking back it was such a stupid and naive thing to do but I learned something from it and had a unreal experience
I got a kick out of this, thank you! Every trip (shroom, LSD and DMT) has been “bad” I honestly thought there was something wrong with me. One shroom trip I was told very clearly “you don’t belong here” by what seemed like an angry demon. I’m terrified to try again.
Yeah that happens to me almost every time. Maybe mushrooms aren't for a white man like me. They did help tremendously though so
Do you have any lasting negative symptoms from it?
@@soprotivleniye7620 not that I’m aware of
Same. my last planned trip with 3.5g, that was same experience. I didn't know if the people in that realm were upset I was there, or it was myself telling me shouldn't have done it. Either way I was quickly ushered out of that realm and shot back down to normal reality. Maybe didn't eat enough to stay there lol
I have mini bad trips every long lasting trip. It's just a few seconds of intense horror as I stare into the void and feel it staring back at me. Then it leaves me as quickly as it came on.
@@SonnyEverywhere I suspect it's beneficial to take a glimpse of the void but I don't need to go down that road any more.
I had the same experience of losing my mind on my first acid trip. I was 100% convinced that I lost it and went totally insane, and then died in the same trip. The suffering was unbearable, but eventually I realised I was doing it to myself by resisting. I saw that “Insanity” and death were completely painless, and that all my suffering my life was caused by me insisting that things need to be some way rather than another. I didn’t come around lightly, but eventually I just let myself die - I’d rather death itself than the pain of resisting it - and in that moment I was free forever with nothing else to lose. It was a hell of an experience, and I’m very grateful for it because it shaped me like Leo said at the beginning, but it was so terrifying and painful I would never wish it upon my worst enemy. But after the worst of it, it was the most profound and beautiful experience I’ve ever had, and if reshaped my entire life for the better. Crazy, crazy ride.
I had a very similar trip with ayahuasca, I wished that I knew back then that when you think you are dying you just need to close your eyes and "die" because when I did that it all went away immediatelly but before that it was incredible hell.
You should definitely give salvia another go. I know that it can be terrifying for a lot of people but I’ve done it over a dozen times at doses ranging from a bowl of dried leaves to a bowl of 40x, and I’ve personally never had a bad salvia trip.
I did however, have some of the most bizarre and interesting experiences in my life. Salvia, more so than anything, gave me a powerful understanding of animism, of what it’s like to be an inanimate object, and of just how weird the world is.
Don't know if this qualifies as a bad trip but it was an extremely frightening moment within a trip. When I was about 19 one of my friends sold acid, so obviously I wound up doing it alot. I would generally get it for free because my house was the house we'd all gather at to trip. One particular night there was about eight of us tripping on acid and I had this bathroom that was kinda small and had blue and white striped wallpaper. Sometimes a few of us would go in there because the lines would wave around while tripping.
There were two others in the bathroom with me and the door was shut. I had a medicine cabinet mirror over a sink and we were all three standing in front of the mirror and for some reason we all decided to look at it at the same time. All of a sudden there was a "whooshing" feeling. Not a sound but a feeling, and everything in reality seemed to totally fall away save for our three faces in the mirror. The light was on but it was beyond dark. Like pitch black doesn't describe it. It's like there was nothing at all there, not even the dark really. I think it only lasted for about ten seconds but it felt much longer than that.
When reality came back all three of our eyes were as big as saucers, and our jaws had dropped. We all some how knew that the other two had just seem the same thing they had seen. We just started to mumble things like "Did you?..." and "What the..." and "There's no way...how?". This was in 1997 so it's not like today when all this info is available online about trips and drugs. We had zero point of reference for what it was. We not only had a shared hallucination, but our minds also did a bit of telepathy. We were just kids and all we really knew of psychedelics was that they can cause you to see things that aren't there and also have some odd experiences that weren't real but felt real. This was way way way past any of that. Stuff like that wasn't supposed to happen or be real but it did and it was.
I had a near death experience on psychs, shit changed my life bro
extremely interesting
Great histories. I recall one of yours blogs videos report couple of years ago were you described a lolineless so deep that was terrifying in an existensial level. In this you described a love so infinite it can traumatized. Great video Leo.
Suggestion for Leo*
Try combining mescaline with Acid. You get the space of the acid but the grounding of the mescaline and that synergy allows incredible kundalini activation and allows somebody to go incredibly deep. Full non-dual supermind if you can open to it.
don't confuse non-ordinary ''super'' states with ''non-dual''.
@@1tecladocasio I’m referring to integral theory when I say supermind which I know Leo is aware of. This combo allows people (at least me) to move from 2nd into 3rd tier, through the subtle and causal into the non-dual. Very trans human and the ego dissipates entirely but you really get a solid glimpse into your core being. But more so it’s simply just a beautiful experience.
Kundalini? Please, talk in terms that are more well established
@@novictim Basicaly is a amount of flow of energy in the body more than normal, due to meditation or some other practice. I don't know for sure hahah.
Acid is fantastic
I listened to this, while on a "trip", to test and see if my mind could withstand it, and not veer off into negative spaces. Somehow, we managed to do it, despite Leo very accurately and descriptive describing all the things that could go wrong 🤣
Strange listening choice. I prefer 21 pilots.
How does one get to no self(know self) if one focus on that your mind can do. That seems egoic. Idk
That doesn’t sound responsible nor productive.
I tried that too. Not too bad, but a silly choice really.
I feel like you’ve brought me back to life with this video, ever since having a bad trip some time ago. looking at this video made me reinterpret the way I perceive things, totally different from the normal
Way I did.
Thanks so much LEO GURA!
Leo I’ve been dreaming about you lately. I went through the worst hell in my life this past month in the most crucial time in my life and I’m doing better now since October but still live in uncertainty. I’ve been watching your lectures for about 6 months daily and found great interest and love in them and I absolutely loved it but when I suddenly got sick and stuck away from home with no choice of giving up or escaping I stopped everything including listening to you until the dream (nightmare actually) came where you sitting on like a throne giving orders to unknown entities telling them to torture me more and saying “put him through the blood, sh!t and guts and burn him again and again” I never felt so terrified and never knew that such hell exist on earth. However I was met with a decision; give up or fight both are hard and I choose to fight and win. A lot of what you taught me is helping me out greatly now, because if I didn’t know who I am and known more about life, existence and God I’d have killed my self a month ago. So I guess thank you.
I love the humbleness you showed in this video 💫♾
I'm still creeped out from a 5.5 gram mushroom trip. It was almost a year ago and it helped me quit smoking and enjoy and appreciate my family. I kept seeing these lines and inside the lines were fractal light patterns where I felt I existed as I am now in other planes of existence in other dimensions. Also I was with my cat and I felt I could experience the world how my cat is experiencing it.
The bad part was I felt it had a schizophrenic element to it.
The trip humbled me and I'm still trying to figure it out.
I've never heard anyone say it quite like that, about multiple planes of existence. I've never had mushrooms (not for a lack of trying) but I've always felt every dream I've ever had is possibly different planes of existence where I'd made different choices, or the entire world as I know it is just different. I spend a lot of time thinking about it, to where my "waking" hours I feel are most likely just a dream as well. But there's certainly no one in my waking life that understands what I'm saying or wants to discuss it. It's hard to put into words anyway. 😂
Here are my 2 cents, the mushrooms greatly weakened the consciousness/focus of your ego, so because of that your higher self could experience others and other planes of existence while not being tied to the ego, but your weakened ego also would leave you prone to lose some significant control of the thoughts and feelings coming from your body, hence the fear and sensation of madness that is common in psychedelics.
It's funny how everyone comments and discusses the video's topic without actually watching the whole thing.
Attention span is pretty short nowadays on human beings.
Just like you did
I often watch one video multiple times throughout the week, doing so I’ve noticed I pick up on things that I didn’t before with each re-listen. I tend to believe I’m the only one who listens to the whole thing.😅 perhaps you feel the same.
You shouldn't presume such things about other people, you'll find yourself with a superiority complex
“Horrific things that may happen to you in life can teach you valuable lessons you will be grateful for”. 🤨 Ever been to combat?
Leo, I like your assessment of 4-aco-dmt being more serious than mushrooms. I've always felt that, but haven't thought it in those words. The discription just sort of 'clicked it' for me. I also do not feel that you can translate a dosage of 4-aco to an equivalent dosage of mushrooms. Their scales aren't compatible even though they have so much in common in terms of effects.
@Melange Hi, I've got problem replying to comments under Leo's videos.
Interesting read! How was your experience when you took 160-180mg DMT? That sounds SO HIGH! Was it manageable after a while or was it to chaotic? Also you write about getting extreme nausea. When I did 80mg and 100mg DMT at two separate times, each with ~400mg harmala I felt no nausea at all. But when I went to an Ayahuasca ceremony I felt that the nausea was a fundamental part of the trip and it ruined my trip a bit (+ the 9 other people tripping at the same time with some going through some tough shit. I wouldn't personally recommend Ayahuasca ceremonies to a serious tripper/psychonaut). But to my question: is it common to get nausea when doing Pharmahuasca?
Bad trips are when you just take it for fun with no intent. Mediate, set an intent, don't do it if your anxious, and then you will not have bad trips.
“You’ll take too much….you’ll get too cocky.”
This is it in a nutshell. Suffice to say, some version of ego clinging is the source of all bad trips. The existential horror of coming face to face with the fact of no-self….substrate within which any and every expression of consciousness is possible.
There’s the wisdom of engaging the letting go to realize no-self first….to then enjoy the flexibility of conscious expression inherent in psychedelics. Or the option of using psychedelics to help force the realization of no-self….. sometimes in horrific ways. IDK…..whichever or. This whole discussion is pretend any ways given whatever happens is done with no one doing it. So who are we talking to? We are talking to ourselves…..which is strange. But stranger still for those actualized. But then again the actualized can trace back to the point where consciousness deliberately chose to start pretending……put on the headset to start playing the game of playing with ourselves. For the hell of it, I guess. It’s just weird! And I like love it. Tally Ho, Leo!! And everyone else…..wonderful people. The game’s afoot!
"So much love it will traumatize you"
That's a bit of my experience today.
A few days ago I had a deep awakening experience where something just clicked, I came to realize that what truly would make the world a better place is to know/understand and love yourself truly and that means to know/understand and love the world, others, God, everything.
The implications of it all have really been hitting me hard and been unpacking and working to cope with this insight
Breaking down crying over the love for children dying in the streets and I'm those kids, and I'm the system that allows for such abuse, like what the fuck man. It's just so god damn beautiful. The world doesn't have to change for me, I don't have to change for the world. It's love and acceptance of myself, and it's terrifying.
Thanks I've lost part of my mind from long term habits built from confusion depression self sabotaging harming myself while tripping and just not accepting reality
I smoked 60x of Salvia with no respect for it, I naively thought it was a party drug because I saw people laughing hysterically on UA-cam when smoking it. It was one of the most traumatising experiences of my life! . As soon as I exhaled the smoked my whole reality sliced up, I sat back on my couch and my whole body felt like a pack of cards being shuffled. The sofa felt like it was eating me and I had to fight with all my mite to stay solid, but my efforts were futile. This is when the oneness happened and I felt no different to an inanimate object. I couldn't relate to anything , my brother and my friend seemed alien and didn't understand what they were and what anything meant. The only thing I could relate to was love. This experience put me off psychedelics, but i'm now fascinated by them , I wouldn't mind trying DMT but If it's anything like Salvia i'll just stick to reading trip reports.
Salvia is not anything like other psychedelics. You should try a low dose of mushrooms or low dose of dmt.
Edit: I haven't gotten the chance to try dmt so I better not recommend it hahaha. I have done mushrooms and lsd close to a hundred times but mostly lower doses and a handful of high doses.
Lsd may be easier to handle than mush but I never know what dose I'm taking and it lasts like 12 hours. Like the time I took 2 tabs of DOx and i was tripping for 30+ hrs lmao. I was told each tab had a hit of lsd and a hit of 2C-E on each one but knew that wasn't right because you can't fit a dose of 2C-E on a tab but I took a chance.
Salvia at that dose reboots consciousness. Reality will snap out of form, sometimes turning black or gray for a second or minutes, or as some other shape or color theme. And then the look and feel of reality will start to appear again. This is why sitting on the couch will feel like you're getting absorbed by the couch, because the held realization of gravity comes after the feeling of it when you're resetting.
DMT is not like salvia at all. If salvia is a reboot, DMT is a short circuit. By short circuit I mean the energy begins to multiply rapidly and the imagination/reality force is dialed way up. The Salvia is there for exploratory purposes and has low dose applications likely.
@@Angelo2Death Yeah I want to try straight Salvia level with buccal administration.
@@Angelo2Death i like this idea of rebooting, never thought about it like that but I think you're right.
It's exactly what happened to me, took salvia in Nature, in the forest, under high threes. When my mind rebooted, I "was" the trees, my arms their branches, and I could feel the wind on them in my arms!!
Wonderful experience, I respected Salvia though, i knew what it was, this is always useful.
The change in focus of actualized org is pretty clear with this video.
I somehow feel that this video could once day save someone's life, or keep them from harms way if they choose to digest the warnings given here.
I had a complex and profound vision many years ago. It was an out-of-body experience and not brought on by a substance. To this day, I have no physical explanation for it. During part of this experience, I felt as though I was falling and became very scared. A small, soft voice in the vision said, "You are not falling. you are moving in a new direction." Ever since then, no vision or trip has been frightening to me. I know that no matter what, I am going to be OK.
Edit: This is not to say that I don't respect how powerful psychedelics can be or that I use them carelessly, but the experience has reassured me that I will be ok during the experience, even if it's uncomfortable. I am super sensitive and can have a trip on just a few hundred mg of edible THC. I have not been frightened during experiences I have had, including realizing and becoming omni-consciousness, but I have been absolutely terrified by what I have learned after the fact, such as the time I realized that literally, everything is an illusion. The experience did not frighten me, but the realization of it and having to incorporate it did.
So good! Leo could you do a video about the Mandelbrot Set (creation blueprint of infinity) ? Think it would be a great video
Leo i'm depersonalized because of my bad trip(weed) when i was 2nd year university student
Leo, you're a great new-age guru and I am really happy to find your channel.
It's a great deal easier to relate to someone who is honest and sincere and by reaching their own awareness by their own experiences.
Thank you.
It's nice to encounter on my path in life, someone who you share things in common with.
Much Love
I've had some "bad trips", but have always come out better in the long run.
Just discovering your channel and this is the first video of yours I’ve watched. I’m hooked. The way you speak is eloquent yet relatable.
Bad trips are only bad if you think they’re bad while you’re tripping. I’ve had trips turn from bad, to good, to bad, to really good. It’s all relative anyways but still your mindset and mental stability are crucial going into a trip. Especially if you take a lot. Remember: there’s no need to always outdo yourself, that’s just ego wanting to be the best
"Turn on your mind, relax and float downstream, it is NOT dieing" ( just might seem that way for a "little while"/eternity or two! )
Haven’t checked out your content in a while, glad I did, this video was a breath of fresh air. Just had a overwhelming trip. I appreciate your content! Much love!
I’ve never taken psychedelics but I could only imagine how crazy they are
Imagine what you would be imagining after having taken them, trying to remember how it was before taken them.
Understanding is an undertaking.
Just do it
Draw a picture of whatever, make sure it’s original. That will be what you would see on a high dose psych trip. That drawing would be like a screenshot of a movie that your trip would be made of.
@@akira4085 what
If I remember correctly, my first dmt trip was the best one cause i had no idea whats going to happen, after that, with each time i got more nervous because of how powerful the trips were
How does it feel when it kicks in ? I've never tried psychedelics and being in the country I'm in, I don't even know how to get some.
I remember the first time I did shrooms, I had taken like 8 dried grams... And I just felt the bliss of infinity, but very quickly I had a thought and then I had another thought and I kept thinking and thinking and I was literally creating hell for myself and was at the point of suicidal thoughts, that's the lesson of psychedelics... You ARE creating your reality, you are creating your suffering and you also have the power to go any direction you want to, you are infinite
I’ve been on dozens of mushroom trips usually 7-9 grams; I’ve never found them to be twisted. They give me truth, beauty and love.
Are you serious? Lmao 3 grams was enough for me to breakthrough. Glad to know I am cheap
@@UsuallyCully 3 grams is a great experience but I need 7-9 for the ego death experience.
@@TrojansFirst Just goes to show how different we all are. I would need just 3-4 grams to reach that state of no-self.
Salvia made me feel extremely violent which freaked me out. That is not my nature. I remember being amazed at how violent I felt in my mind. I did not act upon it, but I never did it again. Mushrooms make me physically feel like I’m being turned inside out. I am the most sensitive to them of all the psychedelics. I’ve never had “bad” trips. I did accept death on mushrooms but I wasn’t freaked out about it. I was peaceful and very accepting of the thought. LSD was just a lot of good feelings for me. DMT has been my favorite of all of them. I always spent hours preparing my home and my mind before my trips. My personal advice is to not resist your journey and to embrace the psychedelics. They have so much to teach you. Psychedelics have brought me and my husband closer and deepened our relationship. I never regretted any of my trips. Maybe I’m lucky or I prepared properly and respected the substances. Much love to all!
I can’t even eat an edible without bad anxiety
I felt the same on Aya like i was getting mad and I felt I going crazy, I saw myself in an mental hospital trying to bring me to life I was dying over and over again. You are right, the dose has do be the right, my first dose was pure bliss, when i drunk the second cup my mind couldn't help it. I felt ego death. I felt i stuck in a loop of mental death, it gelt like madness
Do you have any lasting negative symptoms from it?
@soprotivleniye7620 2 weeks after the trip yes I had anxiety and paranoia.
Has been now almost 2 months, I am back to normal thanks god.
My bad trips have actually turned out to be very beneficial !
Loved this one. So much of what was described was similar to my own bad trips and experiences.
Your thoughts are not your thoughts. They are thoughts implemented deep into your subconsciousness from childhood, movies, songs, etc. Which creates the illusion that you do not have those thoughts when you are sober.
Ussuly?
@@holytrinity7939 ussuly in your daily life when you are sober.
@@jhonnyzuck3746 what does ussuly mean tho? Do you mean usually?
yup.. all of them are nothing but from external stimuli. kinda sad and boring. no magic really pfft
So, let me get this straight... You're not thinking your thoughts, you're thoughts are thinking you? Do "you" REALLY think so?
Always ride out the bad trips. They will come to conclusion and there will be a lesson to be learned.
Not bad Leo, for all the psychedelics you have done, you came out of them sane and wiser. Many people have lost their minds doing the same thing.
“Psychedelics allow us to taste the beyond but do not make us masters of the transcendental."
- Rumi
not Rumi
“Drugs allow us to taste the beyond but do not make us masters of the transcendental.”
- Satyananda Saraswati
Love this.
there is no way he said that..in this language...he was from the middle east, islamic, and spoke a different language and the term psychadelics was coined in like the 50s or 60s and different cultures historically used maybe one or two indigenous plants from the area so the broad term "psychadelics" refering to the broad range we are blessed to have access to nowadays wasn't necessary
@@Circulism He mostly talked about "wine" but he made it sound psychedelic!
In all your vids I've watched thus far, you do an excellent job in explaining what you're trying to convey to your viewers. So glad I've stumbled across your channel, you now have a new sub.
Psychedics are You.
They show your inner landscapes, also all the info you need to hear in that time and Space, but ultimately mushroom showed me the Oneness of everything. We are dreaming together, haha, wake up bro, there is only Love, and you are that Love, you are already perfect and complete, and above the Sky.
“I am Mind, you are the process” said a voice to me once in a trip.
Traumatic to who? The body? The person? The ego? Who am I. Ask yourself this question.
Love to All, Light to all, Peace to All 🙏
I think if you experiment more with N,N-DMT, you'll really come to appreciate the DMT breakthrough. Yes, it's powerful. But once you push past the fear and go all the way, it's freaking amazing. All fear gone. Pure bliss.
Thanks Leo this was a great video
Glad to see you again Leo!
here bad one of mine on DMT (i stopped at the 2 out of 3 dose) at the early of this year
- there's demon in the sky (like Galactus) gazing at me & wanting my organs (i gotta check touch my midsection every 5 minutes whether it's incised or not)
- sense of time was altered, every thing & motion replays for 5-6 times: i had an image in my eyes of turning left 5 times before i really turn (i freaked out and went to drive to escape that Galactus, glad i didn't had an accident)
- it also applied to the clock, it was 2:45am, the clock stuck at 2:45 like half and hour
- i feel like everyone is serving Galactus to lure me to him
- i run for miles hardly exhausted, later getting sweat and things turned down
- several weeks later i accidentally sleep with tibet monk hum on youtube - i dreamed of it again (i think that low hertz of sound somehow affect my brain)
- it was bad but great experience like leo said, it just level me up for the next trip
Salvia scared me. It felt like I was the room and was everything at once. It felt sinister and scary and odd
I've only had 2 bad trips from many. On both occasions I didn't like the environment at the time. Once, the physical environment was not to my liking. The second, the person I was with was in an odd frame of mind. On both occasions I knew I wanted out of the trip as soon as it hit. I experienced frightening hallucinations but luckily was able to convince myself they were only side-affects and to ride them out. All trips give me wonderful insights and I believe I download spirit messages and tap into past lives so I find value in them all. They have made me realise who I truly am and I've had sexual experiences that can't be surpassed xx
Imagine 5-Leo-DMT
I've had one bad out of 30+ trip so fkn blessed!
Your psyche probably isn't burdened with a lot of traumas and dysfunctions, or i am sure that you would have found out by now.
I haven't tipped since I was 20 before I had my children and got married..but I have never had a bad trip...ever and, yet I would never do it again!
when i had a bad trip to mushrooms i actually watched one of your videos to calm myself down and it worked
If you embrace the scary it becomes ok. OR the middle finger works well against the scary, but you can also say “hay that’s cool. Look at those SKULLS” ..BOTH work.
That’s like saying if you see a horrible act happening like rape you can become okay with it if you want to. That’s not a very good mindset. Things are supposed to be scary for a reason. If everything is this relative mindset then who ever has the most power controls all. It would be based off whatever they thought was right and wrong. So they could rape and murder you and it’s okay from their eyes. But would that be okay to you? Do you think that’s a good stance to have, relativism? That’s why we need objective goods and objective evil. Things that we know by heart are bad and you can spiritually/intuitively feel with your body. If we act like evil doesn’t exist and is just subjective than that means anything goes.
I had same trip on lsd too
And I was taken some meds and it had been a while etc
But same way
I was in this dark cold place it was over layed over real life . I was nothing but concuness
I couldn’t have told you what a body or butter knife was.
Soon as I came down I was like, oh I got a body again and there was time and etc
It was crazy but not like fun giggles and trails noooooo!
Like a holding room before death or idk I stuck in a time loop . Thought loop and it was painful !! This roar in my ears
Excited to see where you take the psychedelic phase of the channel. Enjoyed the stories here and makes me feel less alone here. If you've tried 5 MEO MIPT I'd like to hear about it!
I really really want thi video leo.... My worst trip was when I'm tripping and loose all my motivation for life and I think I will never be same.... Worst time of my life.
This is interesting because I’ve noticed that the only time I do have bad trips is when I focus specifically on how I FEEL during vs. What I’m looking for out of it and no matter what doses I take even when the trip is very intense, every time I’m looking for self reflection it’s never as bad. Best example is when I took 4 tabs of acid trying to see if could I guess you could say “commune” with everyone and everything in the world and the trip was getting pretty bad until I ignored it and tried to relax because I was focused on trying to be “one” with everything. It got to the point where the visual hallucinations turned into me sitting in my room but with the universe in my room at the same time and I felt like I was eveyone and everything all at once. But I can’t tell if it’s just because I convinced myself that I was there do you the acid or if I was actually there through using it, Pretty sure it was the first one lol.
I've never had a bad trip but I've done shrooms I'm scared to try them again after you said how bad a bad trip can be but the urge to try shrooms again is strong because I want to bring a loved one back in my mind
Nothing risked, nothing gained.
@@ActualizedOrg makes since
Vitaly has showed me how bad a trip can go.
I remember my first and only mushroom trip I started off with 2 grams, I was with my buddy on the 13 floor of his apartment and at first I realized fear doesn’t exist, how peaceful the present moment is, and I also found it rather interesting looking at myself in the mirror I was thinking “this is the character I’ve been living in for the past 21 years”
As I got closer to the peak I started feeling anxious out of nowhere and it got so bad I was wishing I was just sober again. My friend was playing jazz music which was really setting the energy of the trip at first and I mentioned to him how I was feeling and he switched to a playlist of Pink Floyd and immediately I started to feel a lot better and the trip continued as it did prior to me being anxious.
I definitely got some clarity from this video in terms of a switching the setting if you’re having a bad trip cause it definitely worked well for me😂
How to develop and cultivate empathy for animals while tripping:
Imagine being born as a sentient being from a species different from the human one. With other abilities, with other concerns, with another identity. See yourself interacting with what surrounds you. Feel the interest in what gives you pleasure. See the fear towards what surprises you. See your innocence in front of the human presence in this world. See yourself being trapped by them. You are an enslaved animal now. What's the purpose of your enslavement?
Are you in a zoo? Being used as a clown, so other animals in tuxedos can laugh at you? You don't really understand what's going on around you, but you cannot go where you want. You cannot be who you are. You are given some food whenever you make what they expect you to do. You are capable of understanding this. You have learned to respond to get the food that you want. It is said that human infants are told that you love your owner. Does your enslaver love you? Or does your enslaver love whatever s/he can take out of you?
Or maybe you are in a farm. An organic, familiar farm? An industrial, unmodernized farm? It's the same, you are enslaved. It only changes the colour palette in front of you, and the amount of suffering you are forced to endure. You are a slave. And some people amongst those humans are claiming that you should never be enslaved. These are called ARAs, Animal Rights Advocates, and are vegan. And some other claim that the problem is not that you are a property, but the tones of red in the color palette, absolutely neglecting the slavery part. These are called welfarists. But you don't understand what slavery is. You only know that something is forcing or guiding you. You cannot be the one who you are. You are forced to be a something.
Now see yourself from the outside. The value of your experience of life, your body and your effort is decided by your owner. You can be sold, harmed, confined and terminated if that is what suits your owner. You don't understand what an owner is. They just feed you, and you are grateful when this happens. Then they trick you, and you find yourself in line, standing on a wet floor in a noisy slaughterhouse. There's demand outhere for your flesh, your secretions, your skin, your bones and your fluids: that's the something you are being forced to be.
As an animal, if you could develop a religion, how would you depict humans?
Time for another ego-death...
✨🙏🏻✨
Deep
Yes
By writing these words.. You yourself are in the ego trap.. 😂
Just think about it.. If you want..
Are you angry? Disappointed? That's ego.. 😉❤️
@@dcktater7847 Is it better to have perceived and been eaten, than to never have perceived at all?
@@dcktater7847 We humans are dictators, nazis, when it comes to other animals. You could choose to empathise with a natural predator as a lion. A lion can only survive by hunting and killing. S/he has no choice. You do.
Or you could choose to empathise with a natural prey of a lion. Natural preys are free to scape, free to freeze, free to fight. Most preys scape, indeed.
Slaves aren't allowed to struggle for their survival, because their life is now commodified and valued by their owner as something useful to her/him. It is the mentality of ownership of the owner, what is being pointed at here. And triggered, as we all can read.
Lions (hunting and killing preys), amongst other reasons, are used by some nonvegans as an absurd excuse to justify their nonvegan choices, based in animal slavery.
Slaves (preys not being hunted and killed by lions), amongst other reasons, are used by some nonvegans as an absurd excuse to justify their nonvegan choices, based in animal slavery.
Only a parasite would use the inevitability of death as an excuse to enforce, condone and perpetuate slavery, which is, in itself, violence. Violence always comes from the unresolved hate towards those who are being violated.
Animals are, indeed, neglected by most of us: they are not even victims. They are considered mere things that exist to satisfy us. We were taught to look at them this way.
Either you are vegan, or you are still engaging in animal slavery, for pleasure, for taste, for convenience... You name it. There's no third choice, no third option.
It is your ego the one reading these words. It is your ego the one overimposing intonation and meaning to these words.
Midazolam nasal spray is (imo) a good solution when having a serious bad trip.
I only had one bad trip. I learned that wanting to stop tripping made me trip worse. Fighting it was not good.
I was about 21 or so. Because my little brother was about 19. He sold white blotter. And we went to this apartment of a girl who was only like 15 or 16 - her parents were out of town. And we sold acid to her and all her friends. So, we had a party. Everyone tripping and probably drinking and smoking weed.
At some point someone busted a pipe by the toilet, or... something was gushing water in the bathroom and none of us could figure out how to turn it off. That's when I realized we were on the second floor! Connecting the dots of how this water is about to start pouring out of the ceiling downstairs and the police are probably gonna be here soon.
We have to go! So I run into the next room and tell my brother we gotta go. We headed to the door when someone said, wait you can't go. you're still trippin' I said, i'm not trippin'. I felt sober, but as soon as I said that, I started trippin' again. I saw... not sure how to explain it. Everything went dark - black. Then I saw like a light, a pen, a fiery sword, something writing unknown letters - characters into the air - like cursive.
Eventually we left though. And I think the trip lasted 13 hours total, and we drove around town, back and forth and all around for hours until past daytime. And got some breakfast. I can't believe we never even got pulled over or anything.
One last thing was that whenever me and my brother were together and conversing, we felt kinda normal I guess. But if we ever got silent and stopped talking to each other, or when we were alone like one went into the store or one of us was pissing in the woods, etc. We would start tripping really hard again.
Only took shrooms once. Psilocybin, I suppose. We went and got them ourselves. At night in some farmer's field.
Eventually put on the Wizard of Oz / Pink Floyd mashup. everyone fell asleep halfway through the movie. So I finished it... and then watched it again, alone.
Totally irresponsible providing acid for 15/16 year olds. At age 21 you were old enough to know better.
Of course we all make mistakes.
What are your thoughts on using benzos to escape bad trips
if they're actual real benzos it's worth having nearby but only in emergency situations. Most bad trips aren't emergency situations.
Just did my first trip ever. 5g. Thought I did everything right. Set/setting, light healthy meal before hand, breath work that launched directly into my little trip to hell. Demonic possession I think sums it up perfectly (my cat won’t come into my room. She’s sitting at the door hissing into my room). Something else had control of my body plus full on Tourettes. Combine that with the worst self prosecution. Gotta say, at this point, I have absolutely no desire to do this ever again.
1000 micrograms of Acid was the worst trip I ever had. Certainly wasn’t the time for such a dose when I did it and I genuinely didn’t think I was coming back 😂. The 2nd half of the trip was beautiful though so there’s that. Being younger and stupider I took tabs from multiple batches and persuaded myself that there was some other chemical cocktail in the tabs that had killed me.
Lessons learned: Test your stuff and don’t take a heroic dose just because you’re bored. Pretty obvious lessons but experience is a pretty direct teacher.
I've been waiting for this...
Thank you for sharing this leo
Thank you for this amazing information on psychedelics. They're such beautiful substances but i found that it's very easy to become cocky after a few good trips and it would be such a waste to miss out on the benefits because of a traumatic experience. These videos help me recommit to caution they're very sobering