Gabor Maté, Richard Schwartz & Marc Lewis - Rethinking Addiction

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 209

  • @TheWeekendUniversity
    @TheWeekendUniversity  2 роки тому +43

    Hi All,
    You'll notice that Marc's video cuts out at approx. 16 mins 30 seconds.
    Just to clarify what happened - his internet connection temporarily went down, but he was able to resolve the issue and re-join at around 29 mins 10 seconds.
    Best,
    Niall

    • @willmack3090
      @willmack3090 2 роки тому +3

      I think he was using drugs

    • @tessallations378
      @tessallations378 Рік тому +7

      Hi Niall! I appreciate the explanation. I personally would take it with a grain of salt, just as my internet temporarily 'went down' during an interview when I started panicking, and here it takes places right after Gabor is pretty critical. I think you did a good job navigating and leading the conversation.

    • @stefanospecia7511
      @stefanospecia7511 Рік тому +3

      @@tessallations378 if you check the video at 16:08 his cam is frozen, and anyways their views are fairly similar on addiction

    • @Fefe559
      @Fefe559 Рік тому +4

      I thought it was because of Gabor’s rudeness, flash of narcissist rage there… yikes. You got more work to do Dr

  • @cgenoversa
    @cgenoversa 8 місяців тому +13

    Protectors can keep us alive.. and keep us from living.

  • @kimberlysmithcarlson1777
    @kimberlysmithcarlson1777 2 роки тому +99

    Ive said this before and I'll say it again. Dr. Gabor Mate should receive a Noble Peace Prize for his dedication, life's work and gifted ability to describe extremely complex concepts in a manner that the average person can process, embrace and implement into their lives with tremendous success...

    • @Peem_pom
      @Peem_pom 2 роки тому +11

      I think it shd go to Richard Schwartz!

    • @FKA68
      @FKA68 2 роки тому +3

      Couldn’t agree more about Dr Gabor Mate

    • @kasapbandy1776
      @kasapbandy1776 2 роки тому +4

      Right? And I’m sad he’s so old now. We need someone like him around forever. I hope at minimum his work is appreciated more when he’s gone

    • @l.w.paradis2108
      @l.w.paradis2108 2 роки тому +1

      Love your idea!

    • @beholden2874
      @beholden2874 2 роки тому +6

      @@Peem_pom I think both Richard Schwartz and Dr. Gabor Mate should be given the Nobel prize for their contributions to healing and transformation for our planet.

  • @tulasideviful
    @tulasideviful 2 роки тому +42

    Just a shout out to the presenter Niall for his wonderful facilitation of 3 great personalities in the healing and recovery realm.
    You were humble, asked insightful questions and kept interactions fair and upbeat.
    You can say your name in the beginning if you like as the tiny Zoom label doesn't appear very vivid on screen. Well done!

    • @merrilynstanger7241
      @merrilynstanger7241 Рік тому +2

      To facilitate in a stand out way , be comfortable , know when to speak , guide the 3 into the time allotted is in itself a gift . , as important as the words of each speaker !

  • @joy96815
    @joy96815 3 роки тому +68

    04:18 Internal Family Systems model (IFS)
    07:07 Addiction is a Universal Process
    08:53 Not Why the Addiction, but Why The Pain
    09:23 Not what’S Wrong with the Addiction, but what'S Right about It That does It do For You
    10:16 "Addiction: Any behavior that a person finds temporary relief or pleasure in and therefore craves but suffers negative consequences in the long term and doesn't give up despite negative consequences or when they do give up they suffer irritability withdrawal" - Gabor Maté
    16:02 Distinction Between Dependence and Addiction
    17:13 Debunking the Disease Model of Addiction and Why is it Important that we Let Go of this Narrative
    19:05 Addiction is actually Rooted NOT in the Brain, but in Life-Experiences. It Affects the Psyche and as it Affects the Brain.
    19:37 Your Mind creates the World; the World creates your Mind
    20:55 The Legacy Burden
    24:00 Root Causes
    24:28 Exiled Parts
    26:29 Manager Protectors
    26:44 Firefighters
    32:51 Willpower Model
    33:56 Trauma and the Role that plays in Addiction
    34:24 There'S Pain; then there'S a Response to Pain
    34:52 Trauma is What Happens to Us Inside of Us as a Result of What Happened to us In Fact Trauma Means Wound
    38:23 Addiction and Potentially Healing Addiction
    38:30 Compassion as a Model
    40:56 Using IFS in Treating Addiction
    46:00 Difficulty Connecting to the Self
    48:43 Greater Than the Sum of Your Parts
    49:30 Changing the Narrative We Have Around Addiction
    49:51 “The Body Keeps The Score”
    49:59 Bruce Perry's book with Oprah, "What Happened to You"
    50:06 (how to) Increasing Trauma-Awareness
    56:21 Politicians don't do Self-Inquiry
    57:04 Resources

  • @nathanchasse8189
    @nathanchasse8189 21 день тому

    my god what a panel. thank you for bringing these three together. they've all had a profound impact on me.

  • @nishasankaran
    @nishasankaran 2 роки тому +7

    Richard warms my heart when he says that Gabor warmed his heart. I love these men so soooo much ❤️❤️❤️

  • @goblinsRule
    @goblinsRule 3 роки тому +23

    All my heroes in one video, it was a delight to hear them

  • @katiehenson9957
    @katiehenson9957 3 роки тому +59

    I'm glad I caught this. I am an addict. I struggled with addiction and eating disorders since I was young. Eventually, I ended up a homeless meth addict in my early 30s until I got pregnant with my son. Then I somehow was able to give it up for my son. I went back to college and graduated community college and now university.
    My sons father is still a homeless heroin addict living in a tent and can't stop. I try to encourage him when I see him on the street. But he feels too far gone.
    Its tough, now my eating disorder is back and sugar addiction.
    All I can say is that drugs helped me finally feel confident and function in the world and numb the pain and shame. I still don't know, but I know it's never gone away...
    My dad is an alcoholic, but his parents were not alcoholics and neither is my mom or her parents. But my mom is anorexic..
    I wish I could get more help even now, but it's too expensive.

    • @micheller3731
      @micheller3731 3 роки тому +17

      The inner strength and love you have for your son that clearly keep you going despite ongoing struggles and a difficult past is truly amazing and admirable. What you have achieved is no small feat. I hope you find comfort hearing experts like these talk of the struggles you know only too well. Gabor's video, the Wisdom of Trauma is worth watching, and 'Why Love Matters' by Sue Gerhart is a must read in understanding how your start in life shapes everything and why it is worth the fight for your son. Good luck 💗

    • @jasongravely7217
      @jasongravely7217 3 роки тому +6

      Congrats! Stay on the path you’re on!
      Watching videos like this and learning behaviors (and implementing them) will continue to help :)

    • @DanielDunne1
      @DanielDunne1 3 роки тому +7

      That's inspiring Katie. Wishing you health and happiness.

    • @divalivingston1664
      @divalivingston1664 3 роки тому +4

      @@micheller3731 thanks for the resources you mention. It’s helpful to all who have had addictive behavior wherever we are on the journey to recovery. I don’t feel compelled to go back to any previous behavior but it took a while to get here.

    • @divalivingston1664
      @divalivingston1664 3 роки тому +7

      Katie Henson - I’d say tap into resources like these talks and audio books from Eckhart Tolle or Wayne Dyer. If you feed your soul and your mind you will be more attuned to when you are triggered. When I want to go on a sugar binge, I ask, where am I not finding sweetness? It may not curb it right away, I may have honey in every cup of tea instead of making it a treat once in a while, but I’ve slowed down in buying a lot of sugary snacks and that is a step in the right direction. Keep moving forward.

  • @drsandhyathumsikumar4479
    @drsandhyathumsikumar4479 2 роки тому +7

    I think developing of a secure attachment from the self to the Self as Mark described seems so peaceful and comforting

  • @wendyrudnicki7141
    @wendyrudnicki7141 2 роки тому +11

    I wrote this comment in response to someone who posted concern about Marc Lewis leaving the conversation for a few minutes....
    I was concerned, too. I'm a survivor of severe trauma and have been doing a deep dive into self-compassion and IFS for awhile after years of processing severe trauma through EMDR and with compassionate therapists (doing what I did not realize at the time was IFS work rescuing exiled parts of mySelf). Watching what happened when Mate's critic went after Marc was very informative for me because I have a critical part and an intellectual "manager" part that acts like that sometimes. I figured Marc left for a few minutes to gather himself, comfort his parts, and then came back and was present and kind (the result imho of his own personal work with his parts using IFS). I had compassion also for Mate, he lived through hell (as did I but a different kind). The wounds from that are very deep and take time to resolve. The (undeserved) "guilt" we carry is profound as are the exiled feelings of overwhelming powerlessness. My message to people coincides with what Schwartz teaches and practices--it is possible (slowly, taking baby steps) to reclaim our life after severe trauma; it's painful and takes a lot of time but it is worth it.

    • @50farrell
      @50farrell 2 роки тому +11

      I thought Gabor's rebuttal was a bit harsh to Marc. There is a way to disagree but when you totally dismiss Marc's rationale as nonsensical was not helpful.

    • @tessallations378
      @tessallations378 2 роки тому +6

      thank you for writing this!! i often love to listen to gabor, so it was hard to hear this critical part come out. i think i would have responded the same way (just hidden away). I think it would be great if Richard had done a parts therapy session at the beginning for everyone 😂 that way folks could show up in Self.

    • @self-carespa9449
      @self-carespa9449 Рік тому +2

      i agree Mate was harsh with Lewis but later realized and tried to clean it up

    • @sandramedina9482
      @sandramedina9482 6 місяців тому

      Gabor was informative.

    • @wendyrudnicki6298
      @wendyrudnicki6298 6 місяців тому +1

      Yes, informative but also dealing with his own hurting, traumatized parts. That’s why imho it’s crucial imho that we all bring compassion to our own hurting parts as well as carrying the message of love and compassion.

  • @sylviaoesterwinter8858
    @sylviaoesterwinter8858 2 роки тому +20

    Dr. Mate has made sense of my entire immediate family. Here is what you get with two parents raised by German soldiers: MDD, extreme obesity, bulimia, alcoholism, suicide, notable success, abusive marriages, PLS, GBS, and fibromyalgia. Unfortunately I am the only one in my family trying to stop the cycle but at my age and health it isn't easy. Still fighting tho! Thank you Dr. Mate!!!

    • @persephone4846
      @persephone4846 2 роки тому +1

      This is interesting to me as I’ve just left Germany after a lengthy stay.Ive noticed that German people are VERY different to other nationalities …I suspect that has a lot to do with the countries history of war-trauma.

    • @theunbreaking
      @theunbreaking 2 роки тому +1

      100% for myself

    • @sylviaoesterwinter8858
      @sylviaoesterwinter8858 2 роки тому

      @@persephone4846 I agree. My parents came to the US right before I was born. Going to Germany to visit family was always intense. Not necessarily bad- I think- just intense. I got in trouble at work 20+ years ago and was told I was "ruthlessly efficient". Not an awesome way to build teams. lol!

    • @sylviaoesterwinter8858
      @sylviaoesterwinter8858 2 роки тому

      @@theunbreaking I'm very interested if you feel like sharing.

  • @jeromeelcham1447
    @jeromeelcham1447 2 роки тому +8

    I honestly can say, I think IFS, could change the world.

  • @c.hudson8923
    @c.hudson8923 3 роки тому +5

    Mindig megtiszteltetés ezt a triumvirátust meghallgatni. Köszönöm a bölcsesség nagylelkű megosztását!

  • @emceeskyskraper2962
    @emceeskyskraper2962 2 роки тому +2

    As someone whos read on gabor mate and marc lewis its awsome to see the great minds collab

  • @2biicoachingformndkarlotto317
    @2biicoachingformndkarlotto317 2 роки тому +8

    A part of me is carrying the Legacy burden. Boom.
    Sober for 19 years now and still feels damn heavy.

  • @laurahart3574
    @laurahart3574 2 роки тому +5

    This video was wonderful to listen to! I've been doing research on how to conquer addiction outside of the 12 steps. In 17 years I never knew there were other options out there except for AA or NA. It literally has never worked for me and countless others. I felt so ignorant when I discovered there are other answers! I love when the gentleman said instead of focusing on the addiction we should be focusing on what DRIVES the addiction! 12 step programs do not do this! Anyway, thank you again to all involved with this informative video. It truly opened my eyes in so many ways! God Bless!

    • @mamasyaya1
      @mamasyaya1 2 роки тому +2

      Me, too! I'm looking at some alternative to AA because it just doesn't speak to me.

  • @davidchadwick5423
    @davidchadwick5423 2 роки тому +26

    I'm a severely messed up individual, but I am so so 'proud' of myself that I didn't have children...that I didn't pass on my pain and burdens to another living human being.

    • @courtneybrubaker9738
      @courtneybrubaker9738 2 роки тому +5

      Me too.

    • @willmack3090
      @willmack3090 2 роки тому

      I'm so glad you didn't as well you are a really f***** up person

    • @ManusMagus
      @ManusMagus 2 роки тому

      There's still hope

    • @punyashloka4946
      @punyashloka4946 2 роки тому +1

      So true 👍

    • @truerosie
      @truerosie 10 місяців тому +1

      Me too. Conscious choice when I was 12, no regrets. Good to meet others of like mind.

  • @Peem_pom
    @Peem_pom 2 роки тому +2

    This was supposed to be about Addiction, but was so much more than that ❤️

  • @Supremedoge155
    @Supremedoge155 2 роки тому +2

    Also read Grace and Addiction by Gerald May. Gentle way to continue discussion.

  • @jarijansma2207
    @jarijansma2207 3 роки тому +5

    Omg yessss.
    I've been figuring out a synthesis of gabor's Insight with IFS, the timing of this couldn't be more appropriate

  • @missdemeanor2637
    @missdemeanor2637 7 місяців тому +1

    All of them are remarkable. Mind blown. So much information.

  • @delaney6066
    @delaney6066 3 роки тому +18

    Terrific talk. I've just started to dive into Richard’s work so the presentation of Gabor and IFS concepts together is truly valuable.
    Mark’s book is on my to-read shelf, as well. 👍🏼

    • @sealisa1398
      @sealisa1398 2 роки тому +1

      His two books, Memoirs of an Addicted Brain and The Biology of Desire, are compelling reads. Makes you think..

  • @samo917
    @samo917 2 роки тому +17

    Love the Schwartz-Mate bromance lol

  • @219nes
    @219nes 2 роки тому +7

    Omg yessssss, I have been working with the minnesota model for my addiction since one year. Been to a clinic in South Africa etcetra but as a functioning addict I couldn’t relate in so many things. They called it my denial and made my critic even stronger. “Why does it work for everybody and not for me?”
    I have missed compassion in that program which initially caused my addiction. I never had compassion for myself so the inner fight between fire fighter and critic was severe. Tomorrow I stop the minnesota model and I am lucky I have therapist at the clinic in that dont believe in this program aswell.

    • @mamasyaya1
      @mamasyaya1 2 роки тому +2

      Same!

    • @texastoast5202
      @texastoast5202 4 місяці тому

      Hey, I’m Craig in Dallas. So, I was reading your thread and was wondering…..did you try the 12-steps? I never heard of the Minnesota model or even IFS but I will try. What were/are you addicted to and how are you doing these days? These 3 men are very good and I love they all agree addiction is not a disease like the 12-steps espouse. HOWEVER, while they are good at talking about the problem and its origin, THEY NEVER TALK ABOUT THE SOLUTION!! HOW IN THE FUCK DO I OVERCOME OPIATE ADDICTION!!!! REHAB DOESNT WORK, 12-STEPS don’t FUCKING WORK SO WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO!!!!!!!😊

    • @219nes
      @219nes 4 місяці тому

      @@texastoast5202 oh the desperation in your words. So relatable! You know, try different things. What really works for me is fasting 72 hours. I avoid heavy activities and sit it out. Only water coffee and tea. I know it is dramatic, but for me when I have a relapse that is really the only actual thing that works for me. A total reset of the body. It is only three days and afterwards your rewarding system finds joy in food which is ok ofcourse. Not to much, but you won’t be able to eat much anyway. If you want we can try it together and keep in touch.

  • @EranHertz
    @EranHertz 3 роки тому +11

    This made me feel better, don't feel shame anymore. But I can't change how people look at me.

    • @JimiBegbaaji
      @JimiBegbaaji 2 роки тому +5

      That's the wonderful thing. How people look at you only matters if you permit it. They are lacking the insight into the you that you have chosen to be. Celebrate that!

    • @Peem_pom
      @Peem_pom 2 роки тому +2

      True, we must make these insights more popular and widely understood

  • @colleendevere7491
    @colleendevere7491 2 роки тому +6

    Superb talk! The next frontier is to understand how to treat the cycle between firefighter parts and the parts in family members affected by the firefighters behaviors and choices...in other words how to bring IFS to Alanon members so that they to can heal🤔. Btw, the interviewer did an outstanding job!

  • @Roarzan
    @Roarzan 3 роки тому +9

    I actually agree with Marc's distinction between physiological and psychological. Because although Gabor is right is noting that all addictions find a marker in the brain, there is a distinction to be made about what the causal origin of the addiction in the first place. A physiological addiction emerges as a symptom of say, a substance, interacting with our biochemistry. Whereas a psychological addiction will emerge not from something to do with our inherent biology, but from out psychology, which can vary a lot more than our physiology.
    We all share a very similar biology, which makes us susceptible to the same physiological addictions. But our psychology varies a lot more and for that reason we may have very different propensities towards one or another psychological addiction. This is obvious when you look across cultures how different individuals manifest addictions based on the different pressures their cultures and societies put on them.
    An understanding of physiology can get us to pinpoint the root causes of physiological addictions, but only an understanding of psychology can get us to the root of psychological addictions. The causal root matters and the distinction between physiological and psychological is valid.
    EDIT: Just a quick example on both. There's medical treatments that leave patients addicted to the substance used to treat them, this is a physiological addiction. People in more religious countries showing more pornography addiction is an example of a psychological addiction and one that shows differences across cultures as I talked about previously.

    • @bodymindsoul60
      @bodymindsoul60 2 роки тому +1

      If you study the brain itself you will understand why Gabor is accurate
      There are recent studies on rats

    • @bodymindsoul60
      @bodymindsoul60 2 роки тому +1

      Furthermore, studies show pornography’s effects on the brains physiology

    • @mynz4464
      @mynz4464 2 роки тому +3

      I agree. I think of myself and my boyfriend, both of us have had issues with heroin. But I used to make myself more extroverted, to calm the depression and anxiety, to make myself happier. Whereas he used for the thrill, the danger of living the lifestyle, to rebel against his conservative upbringing, to feel an ever growing need for more excitement and danger. We both suffered the withdrawals the same, but we need to examine different parts of our psychological need for the drug and work with those causes as well.

    • @mirandabrunskill7755
      @mirandabrunskill7755 2 роки тому +3

      You make some very good points. I agree that the psychology aspect and differences between individuals is profound. I do think that early childhood trauma and ongoing trauma affects how brain chemistry develops. In a physiological sense, I've been made dependent on a prescription medication. I want to stop it but I can't because my body is now dependent on it. I'm not addicted to it. I agree with Gabor's distinction between dependency and addiction. Also I am an obsessive and addictive person but not towards substances such as alcohol, illegal drugs etc. My obsession and addiction is in the form of limerence. This has been ongoing since childhood. Only by gaining awareness can these problems be dealt with I think.

  • @MiaStayingCreative
    @MiaStayingCreative 2 роки тому +3

    Currently reading Richards book “No Bad Parts” and greatly benefiting from it 😍😍😍😍

  • @velvetclaw2316
    @velvetclaw2316 2 роки тому +19

    Dick Schwartz has a beautiful modesty.

  • @juliashearer7842
    @juliashearer7842 2 роки тому +2

    Excellent information. Thank you. Brilliant to see these three discussing the "new" model of addiction.

  • @k_k6281
    @k_k6281 8 місяців тому

    I cannot imagine being surrounded by those 3 amazing humans. well done for holding the space so well and congratulations for being so level headed- i would bounce from excitement from talking to them hahaha thank you for this channel 🙂

  • @TheEontraveler
    @TheEontraveler 8 місяців тому +1

    Amazing thanks.

  • @Anniebear7f
    @Anniebear7f 8 місяців тому +2

    I’m 62, and this is the first time I have ever heard that Addiction is not A Disease. wow

    • @nedakiadaliri
      @nedakiadaliri 8 місяців тому

      That's Gabor Maté for you. He approaches everything from the lens of compassion

    • @annaalcyone6469
      @annaalcyone6469 4 місяці тому

      It’s helping you. Trying to protect you. But it’s not working.

  • @melissacaetanoviveremconex4344
    @melissacaetanoviveremconex4344 2 роки тому +1

    Thanks for this wonderful meeting! 🙏❤️

  • @lisacox8865
    @lisacox8865 2 роки тому +2

    What an amazing talk🙏thank you soooo much for your work, all of you🙏🥰🌿

  • @stacyhutchins4675
    @stacyhutchins4675 2 роки тому +2

    I'm a recovering addict, and I'm so used to, familiar with not feeling pain that I try anything to feel good.

  • @janetsontilt
    @janetsontilt 2 роки тому +2

    Terrific shares! Great talk and interview

  • @aint1noob
    @aint1noob Рік тому +34

    I was shocked by Gabor Maté's treatment of Marc Lewis. I would expect personalities of this level to know how to contradict their colleagues with respect and humility, and Maté took a very different path. Regardless of how correct I'd think my view is, I still wouldn't choose to bring my point across in these terms, even to a coworker in front of a small team. But Maté puts down his collaborator with condescendence in front of an audience of thousands of people who look up to him. All my respect to Marc Lewis's dignified reaction.

    • @queen_minnieme8321
      @queen_minnieme8321 Рік тому +6

      What part of him is condescending? I think it is subjective. And you might want to relook at how perhaps it triggered you?

    • @Itisparsa
      @Itisparsa Рік тому +8

      That's what I noticed as well, it seems Gabor got pretty insecure by Mark, I was following both of these guys and clearly Mark to me has more scientific approach to Gabor, Gabor is a good Artist/Writer/Magician but Mark is the scientist I believe.
      after meeting Mark Lewis, Gabor looked like a fake Mark Lewis to me and after this talk I doubt I ever follow Gabor talks anymore.
      I even have some feelings/doubts that Gabor is suffering from Narcissism and downing Kruger effect (and of course I'm not an expert, I'm just a curious guy about anything related to psychology) and of course Imposter syndrome, so If Gabor is reading my comment anytime in the future, I want to ask him this question: when you're commenting about Jordan Peterson suppressed rage, can you see that in your behaviour as well? I'm sure that's clear on this video. be more humble Gabor and I love you as well for all insights you gave to me about ADHD, so take my words as an observation from one of your "previous" fans.

    • @dananica5314
      @dananica5314 Рік тому +10

      @@Itisparsa Thank you for your reply, it's reassuring to know that I was not alone in noticing this

    • @dananica5314
      @dananica5314 Рік тому +14

      @@queen_minnieme8321 I got "triggered" by rudeness and unfairness and I believe that's a healthy reaction

    • @Fefe559
      @Fefe559 Рік тому +9

      @@Itisparsaright? And I love GM but he has moments.., I can see his cptsd or touches of narcissism- guess he is one of us I suppose

  • @drsandhyathumsikumar4479
    @drsandhyathumsikumar4479 2 роки тому +1

    I hope Dr Gabor also talks about each human beings self accountability to overcome intergenerational trauma leading to addictions . I find Tim fletcher ideas really help in this regard

  • @sumari972
    @sumari972 2 роки тому +1

    such a great conversation, such a small amount of viewers... Thank you for bringing these three great men together! ❤️👍

  • @kimlawson2164
    @kimlawson2164 2 роки тому +11

    LOVE IFS! Love Gabor. Everyone I see him on a video I click. I'm addicted to Gabor.... dammit.... one more addiction

  • @Be1More
    @Be1More 3 роки тому +2

    thank you... this is where I am after much other therapy.

  • @moishekellmanart
    @moishekellmanart 3 роки тому +7

    I'm so glad to see the best in the filed in one "room"

  • @urbansetter1
    @urbansetter1 2 роки тому +5

    You don't get addicted to the substance. You get addicted to the pleasure the substance gives you

  • @katherinepettit6585
    @katherinepettit6585 2 роки тому +2

    I loved listening to this thank you for sharing ❤️😊

  • @christianalcaraz8644
    @christianalcaraz8644 6 місяців тому

    I'm in absolute astonishment with this amazing video and all the beautiful people in it.
    I'm in recovery, Alcoholics Anonymous and find this extraordinarily useful to add onto my program of recovery.
    Everything coincides with the little I've learned about addiction through my experience and opened up so many new ideas and solid insite on everything addiction related.

  • @8500998
    @8500998 Рік тому +2

    Dick could totally use some Landmark Education. Gabor has definitely taken it. It would really help him, despite being annoying & culty. He has so much to share. And they light a fire. Dick, grab some fire from Landmark?!

  • @micheldisclafani2343
    @micheldisclafani2343 3 роки тому +4

    I just wrote something to help people, but it was erased. I will not repeat what I said except that anything we do is registered forever, so be prudent!
    I am 83 and in my life I have enjoyed a drug.The drug that I enjoy is LIFE, the best there is. We are the captain of our boat!

    • @jerrelboyd2441
      @jerrelboyd2441 3 роки тому +5

      Interesting analogy as I am pondering moving off the land and onto a live aboard sailboat. The inner guide is quite convincing that this is the therapy I could benefit greatly from. I'm a 69 yo male cptsd survivor. The discussion by these guys could actually affect my behavior as I respond to seeing myself differently, from critic to brilliant problem solver.

  • @Umuma871
    @Umuma871 3 роки тому +6

    To quote Richard “yeh basically I’m agreeing with both those guys” 😉🙌🏽

  • @drsandhyathumsikumar4479
    @drsandhyathumsikumar4479 2 роки тому +1

    Also trauma is more a response in a individual and the answer lies there too

  • @miizzashley13
    @miizzashley13 11 місяців тому

    I’d love to see Dr. Colin Ross, Dr. Gabor Mate, Dr. Richard Schwartz, and even Bessel Van Der Kolk collaborate.
    Maybe I haven’t seen anything with them together aside from this one with Dr. Richard Schwartz and Dr. Gabor Mate.
    Any suggestions?

  • @MURUR1025
    @MURUR1025 2 роки тому +2

    Agree with Gabor at 15:40 mark. Blind spot for Marc Lewis.

  • @wayofspinoza2471
    @wayofspinoza2471 2 роки тому

    Dr. Gabor Mate has given us much; however, there is more. Gurdjieff and Spinoza’s teachings give us keys how to awaken our mind and learn the power of understanding our trauma, addictions and face the problems that confronts us, then it’s possible to become free. WayofSpinoza

  • @sandramedina9482
    @sandramedina9482 6 місяців тому +1

    The mind creates the world… and the world creates the mind 🌍🙏🏽🩶

  • @samantha-kemp-therapy
    @samantha-kemp-therapy 2 роки тому

    Such a good discussion

  • @xinliSG
    @xinliSG 2 роки тому

    Thanks thanks to this platform.....🙏🙏🙏

  • @jeffmallory3907
    @jeffmallory3907 Рік тому

    100%, Niall! thank you

  • @delphinebrooks5110
    @delphinebrooks5110 Рік тому

    the sickness is not the consumption of substances but the craving that they produce

  • @kennethguitarfiend4493
    @kennethguitarfiend4493 9 місяців тому

    Enlightening

  • @andrewclarke7798
    @andrewclarke7798 2 роки тому

    Fascinating, thank you!❤

  • @Sitt593
    @Sitt593 8 місяців тому

    17:07 That's bars G. Maté!

  • @shepherd1938
    @shepherd1938 2 роки тому +3

    I’d like to see Gabor and Dick write a book 😊

  • @user-yo7fk4vl2g
    @user-yo7fk4vl2g 3 роки тому

    Great messages! Thank you!

  • @lynnmckenna9934
    @lynnmckenna9934 2 місяці тому

    I agree!

  • @lark865
    @lark865 2 роки тому +10

    So I'm like halfway through this video and I'm really distracted by the fact that Marc is gone, and I'm super worried about him. Is he okay? Are his feelings hurt because Gabor disagreed with him? Does he come back? It's really bothering me. That probably says something about my childhood that I definitely do not want to look into.

    • @lark865
      @lark865 2 роки тому

      Oh, good he came back.

    • @wendyrudnicki7141
      @wendyrudnicki7141 2 роки тому +5

      I was concerned, too. I'm a survivor of severe trauma and have been doing a deep dive into self-compassion and IFS for awhile after years of processing severe trauma through EMDR and with compassionate therapists (doing what I did not realize at the time was IFS work rescuing exiled parts of mySelf). Watching what happened when Mate's critic went after Marc was very informative for me because I have a critical part and an intellectual "manager" part that acts like that sometimes. I figured Marc left for a few minutes to gather himself, comfort his parts, and then came back and was present and kind (the result imho of his own personal work with his parts using IFS). I had compassion also for Mate, he lived through hell (as did I but a different kind). The wounds from that are very deep and take time to resolve. The (undeserved) "guilt" we carry is profound as are the exiled feelings of overwhelming powerlessness. My message to people coincides with what Schwartz teaches and practices--it is possible (slowly, taking baby steps) to reclaim our life after severe trauma; it's painful and takes a lot of time but it is worth it.

    • @lark865
      @lark865 2 роки тому +1

      @@wendyrudnicki7141 , yeah, I'm glad it all worked out. I've totally been on both sides of that, both thinking what I'm doing is good natured debate only to accidently hurt the other person and the person who is easily hurt by what others mean to be good natured. So, I think they both handled it well.

    • @alvodin6197
      @alvodin6197 2 роки тому +2

      Guys, they are adults. they can handle this.

    • @lark865
      @lark865 2 роки тому

      @@alvodin6197 , I know that's the joke, I also think you know that too, but I can't be sure as it's hard to read tone over text.

  • @bw9382
    @bw9382 6 місяців тому

    Holllieeee moly damn they really pulled out the best of the best for this one huh!
    I really am curious what Gabor Mate has to say on IFS. Or alternatively what Richard Schwarts has to comment about ADHD.

  • @jessicamorales2555
    @jessicamorales2555 3 роки тому +3

    I lost my very close friend due to a very aggressive cancer just last week. Can you tell if crystal meth can cause cancer? he did it for few months, some 35years ago.

    • @MFJoneser
      @MFJoneser 3 роки тому +2

      I am so deeply empathetic for your loss. I lost someone that way in June. My thought is that causative link is unlikely. The information you shared caused me to wonder if he had deeper life pain / stress / shame related to his family and or life view.
      Hang in there my friend.

    • @jessicamorales2555
      @jessicamorales2555 3 роки тому +2

      @@MFJoneser thanks for your sweet response.

    • @marcodallolio9746
      @marcodallolio9746 2 роки тому +2

      I'm sorry for your loss. I have also lost a close person to cancer, and I've struggled to find THE answer, the ONE cause for all the suffering. And meth, being already evil, is certainly a good candidate. However, unfortunately, it's very unlikely to be the cause. It's very unlikely there is only one cause, but rather a network of interdependent factors. I know its not a particularly comforting answer, but its true.

    • @JimiBegbaaji
      @JimiBegbaaji 2 роки тому +1

      The meth was a solution to a problem. Then the meth became the problem itself.

  • @derekgross8170
    @derekgross8170 3 місяці тому +1

    Gabor is knowledgeable in his technical way but the symbolic and metaphorical wording understanding of dick is just far superior to create a dialogue and a story and an understanding to ones situation ifs is so much easier for an individual to speak to themselves, gabors wording and language ius that useful to the person affected by the addiction. it is do scientific - objective - and to impersonal, it just doesn't have the dialogical or intersubjective depth that ifs provides. It might be part of the reason why Gabor is a little arrogant and slightly condescending because he thinks he has control of these propositional terms but those propositional terms do not resonate well in the phenomenon of addiction are the conversation of real addicts just on the edge of death understanding add gabor's attitude I think reflects his own frustration and lack of depth psychology it's his way of trying to get ahold of something that his language will not allow him to g
    et ahold of

  • @texastoast5202
    @texastoast5202 4 місяці тому +1

    ****** Maybe I didn’t catch it,but, none of them talked about the SOLUTION to addiction?!!?!? They didn’t talk about treatment and whether it helps!! 12-steps? Etc.

    • @jscire__872
      @jscire__872 2 місяці тому +2

      The solution is to gently find out and understand what purpose that coping mechanism of addiction serves for the brain. Internal dialogue with your subconscious thought patterns (i.e.parts) and radical self-compassion towards your own self are the keys to helping your brain and body (as that is what your mind is) through the addiction and internally conflicting emotions towards inner cohesion and new more constructive ways cope.

  • @livingmedicineinstitute
    @livingmedicineinstitute 5 місяців тому

    Interested in the next level of this conversation?
    We are excited to share on our channel a groundbreaking interview with Dick, with the below description.
    In this fascinating conversation, Dick discusses for one of the first times the spiritual implications of working with parts of self. In line with many traditions of the ancient world, we appear to have many parts that we are not consciously aware of. Though most of those parts belong to us, and are best integrated and healed, some parts do not. It is these that need to be removed, and their apparent sentient nature shakes up much of what current, scientific psychology is willing to see and accept.
    No matter what your views, you will be fascinated by Dick’s honest report of his decades of experience working first-hand at the crossroads of psychology and spirituality. Clinical evidence has shown that IFS works, and it is one of the most widely trained psychotherapy interventions today. We cannot, then, easily dismiss Dick’s wealth of clinical experience. The implications of this conversation are immense and only beginning to be understood.
    Deep gratitude to both Dick and his guides for their willingness and clarity in giving this thirsted-for guidance to the psychedelic provider community.

  • @puckloki873
    @puckloki873 3 місяці тому

    Substance abuse is the laziest of all addictions. Do better folks. Go big or go home.

    • @jscire__872
      @jscire__872 2 місяці тому

      Whatever the addiction it is a physical coping mechanism of the brain. Being defensive about it or about others using it is irrelevant and ultimately unhelpful, for you especially. There are a better and calmer ways to exist in life

  • @afsanehsalehi6785
    @afsanehsalehi6785 Рік тому

    Isn’t it wiser and more valid to have an opponent in your discussion?

  • @adam11830
    @adam11830 7 місяців тому

    What is the evolutionary perspective on IFS? Why does this seem to work?

    • @jscire__872
      @jscire__872 2 місяці тому

      Part of that is a question of how and why our complex conscious mind developed physically into what it is today. I suspect there’re few specific answers to that one, except that it did obviously develop into our brains 😅 Personally I would just assume that having these different modes of being (i.e. family-self, work-self, spouse-self, defensive-self, locked-up-trauma-emotion-self etc. etc.) would all serve a historical human just as those coping mechanisms serve us today

  • @sandramedina9482
    @sandramedina9482 6 місяців тому

    Gabor❤

  • @DrTLKillens
    @DrTLKillens 2 роки тому

    How is this different from inner bonding

  • @rachelallard550
    @rachelallard550 2 роки тому

    What about using people as our happiness and feel good. Addictions to people

    • @truerosie
      @truerosie 10 місяців тому

      It's the same dynamic, just different 'substance' or process.

  • @align2source
    @align2source Рік тому +1

    💚

  • @reneesantiago6496
    @reneesantiago6496 2 роки тому +5

    Everytime i watch Gabor he comes off as a high minded snob!!

    • @texastoast5202
      @texastoast5202 4 місяці тому

      Dude, I was just thinking the same thing! He’s a very omnipotent, pompous, know it all snob that talks down to people. There’s no doubt he’s knowledgeable but he’s arrogant as fuck.

  • @PerfectPetProductions
    @PerfectPetProductions 2 роки тому +2

    The inner critic idea is valid and can be difficult, but I see it in a slightly different way. I think its the 2 hemispheres of the brain interacting.
    Childhood trauma gives loud negative reinforcement views from these 2 sides of the brain in my non scientific opponion.

  • @jeromeelcham1447
    @jeromeelcham1447 2 роки тому +1

    Dr Gabor Mate has never touched the nonphysical.

  • @AbsAnon
    @AbsAnon Рік тому +3

    Looks like Gabor Mate had his micro-manager part show up for this one.

  • @harryneuhoff9115
    @harryneuhoff9115 Рік тому +1

    Why does Gabor have it out for Marc?

    • @csmith-fh2lx
      @csmith-fh2lx Рік тому +3

      I think Gabor leapt in to defend vulnerable people from Marc's rather judgemental, harsh assessments. I didn't feel comfortable with Marc's theorizing about addiction and our damged selves and felt he didn't " get it" in the understanding, kind and embracing way that Gabor and Richard did. I didn't think that Marc had a secure sense of Self and would definitely avoid him as a therapist. Disappearing offline after being challenged by an esteemed peer did him no favours with the audience. Although a certain percentage will blame Gabor for "attacking". I'm not one of them. I believe he was sticking up for the downtrodden.

    • @texastoast5202
      @texastoast5202 4 місяці тому +1

      @@csmith-fh2lxYeah, but don’t you find Gabor extremely arrogant, condescending and bossy? I did. He has knowledge but I think Marc knows way more about the brain circuitry.

  • @discover.yourjoy
    @discover.yourjoy 10 місяців тому

    Can IFS help a narcissist? Doesn't a narcissist have no real Self? Or least a secure relationship with Self?

  • @inspecktavegofficial1396
    @inspecktavegofficial1396 10 місяців тому

    Schwartz-Mate bromance lol

  • @simonsays525
    @simonsays525 2 роки тому

    100%!!

  • @elephantgratitude
    @elephantgratitude 6 місяців тому

    I think Descarte’s error seeped into this conversation

  • @SW-jg7yh
    @SW-jg7yh 2 роки тому +1

    What the heck happened to Mark

  • @Dischordian
    @Dischordian 2 роки тому

    46:00 when protectors take over again

  • @smileyface702
    @smileyface702 2 роки тому

    Niall, do I detect a northern Irish accent?

  • @Happihaus
    @Happihaus 3 роки тому

    🥰

  • @martianmatters
    @martianmatters 7 місяців тому

    Newer heard anything abouth other presidents,

  • @SlackKeyPaddy
    @SlackKeyPaddy 3 роки тому +5

    Well Marc comes back after 30 minutes yet is so fidgety with a smirk of judgmental denial on his face; he obviously needs to deal with his denial issues and repressed emotions; Marc totally identifies with his professional Titles (egotism ) , I am this and I am that. 'Sounds like 'alchemy, Marc said! Spiritual Alchemy is the transformation of lead (ignorance) into gold of enlightenment. WTF! Marc Lewis is a total materialist and would be a dangerous psychotherapist to have, I 'm afraid

    • @MFJoneser
      @MFJoneser 3 роки тому +1

      Super interesting point.

    • @TravellerDM007
      @TravellerDM007 3 роки тому +4

      Too harsh. Yes to discernment, however, listen more. Judge less. Take what works, leave the rest. Your points would have more value if in fact you tried discernment not name-calling. Even noticing -with curiosity- would be helpful. (The old saying -- 'if you spot it, you got it' while not entirely true, but may have some relevance here.

    • @jld4870
      @jld4870 2 роки тому +1

      @@TravellerDM007 ‘if you see it you got it’ or you may not see others you see only yourself in others.
      We are all a work in progress.

    • @tessallations378
      @tessallations378 2 роки тому +2

      i don’t think so! he responded to a way that i would’ve if gabor had responded to me like that - i would have seen it as him criticizing me instead of what i thought and tried to hide away (that has happened to me during a zoom call, I just blamed it on the connection). When he came back i saw it as him nervous but being brave (because now he also messed up the interview flow, etc, but is coming back anyway)

  • @SlackKeyPaddy
    @SlackKeyPaddy 3 роки тому +4

    Looks like Marc Lewis couldn't handle the facts about addiction that Dr. Mate told him, pushed his know-it-all attitude, I guess . LOL

    • @hamm5312
      @hamm5312 2 роки тому +11

      Maybe it was the manner in which Gabor told him. It came across a bit abrasive.

    • @sealisa1398
      @sealisa1398 2 роки тому +2

      Give it up...you already bashed him once.

    • @sealisa1398
      @sealisa1398 2 роки тому +3

      @@hamm5312 I agree, less than optimal choice of words.

    • @hamm5312
      @hamm5312 2 роки тому

      @@bodymindsoul60 in a very abrasive way.

    • @cynthiam1381
      @cynthiam1381 2 роки тому +3

      I dont think abrasive is the correct word, Gabor is confident due to his long history of working with addicts for decades , and why would a proffesional be so thin skinned to be offended 🤷

  • @grahamhewett4234
    @grahamhewett4234 10 місяців тому

    Some more "experts" in an area where there are none.

  • @sarahdonahue1433
    @sarahdonahue1433 2 роки тому +1

    Everything was great until the politics. I found that to be self serving. Why single out the USA? I am proud of this country and its leaders.

    • @bartveenvliet7341
      @bartveenvliet7341 2 роки тому

      that´s a part speaking

    • @alvodin6197
      @alvodin6197 2 роки тому

      USA iis a war mongering psychopath nation, filled with sick leaders and imbeciless.nmaybe that's why?