"Being Trans Made Me Gay." : Hormone Science & Sexual Orientation
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- Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
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I think one thing that is missing from this discussion is bisexual people who have convinced themselves that they are gay or straight and have been living according to that belief. They might experience an event - be it religious or traumatic - that causes them to flip from gay to straight or vise versa, thus *appearing* to change their sexual orientation. Yet their actual orientation is bi, so the only thing changing is which aspect of their orientation they are expressing via their lived experience.
I completely agree this is something ive experienced in my own life. For the longest time I thought that I was straight but that being gay was a choice. I intellectually understood the concept of sexuality but emotionally it didn't make much sense.
As someone who grew up a tomboy, is bi-sexual, was sexually assaulted by a man at 15, was in an abusive relationship with a woman at 21, and ended up marrying a man; I can say we allow who we love to define us, and we really shouldn't. Who I dated and ended up marrying does not define me. How I dress and present myself to others does not define me. How I act, react, and treat others does define me because that is what character traits are: how you interact in the world.
I’m sorry you had to go through that. However, marriage actually IS defining yourself by who you’re with. In fact, it’s so very much that that you end up creating new life based on yourself AND this other person. That’s how much it defines you. It might be the most important definition of yourself that you’ll ever have.
Your actions define you
I absolutely agree with you! Love who you love and don't give a sh¡t about the "definition" ...
Very well said and good for you.
Beautifully said 🙏
Hormones can play a huge role. I was always a bisexual woman. I had a radical hysterectomy at the age of 37 because of endometriosis. Now I’m pretty much asexual. I have zero attractions or desires to anyone. I have been married to a man for 10.5 years and I am still attracted to him, but not at all the way I was before. I have zero sexual feelings at all now. I take HRT but it doesn’t seem to help me. I have to force myself to engage in sexual activities and I basically just do it for my partner because I love him. I don’t even enjoy being touched anymore and and I used to be both a very affectionate and sexual person. It makes me sad.
Hugs.
This does not make you asexual. Loss of libido is not a sexual orientation
Reminds me of jellogs cereal founder the whole point was to reduce ppls sexual desire via nutrition lacking and that messes with hormones. Hormones from ex vegans who hated kids went to wanting /having kids
You made me realize something...
I have Crohn's and when I got sick I lost a lot of weight and my health collapsed. If I had to knee I couldn't stand up using my legs only, I had to grab something and pull myself back up.
In that time I noticed my libido simply disappeard. I didn't feel attracted to any men anymore. After seeing all the hot men around I just thought to myself "oh he's beautiful" but 0 sexual interest. I was just admiring something like the sunset.
Have you tried visiting other physicians? And maybe some experts? Because that sounds wrong...
We have like 70% of women in my family and a few of them (including my sister) had hysterectomy, but none of them mentioned anything about sexual changes...
I'm so sry you have gone thru tht. I hope you come to understand yourself and find peace and happiness.
Gay woman here, had a great childhood, no trauma, just fun. Never been bullied, just became skilled at avoiding dodgy people. Just a bit of a tomboy all through childhood and that's it. Sorry, happy gay here. Cannot imagine being attracted to men. Men are great, some of my best friends, favourite family members, no problems with guys at all. Just not attracted to men but very much attracted to women. What are these bisexuals arguing about?
mee too
We also have to remember antidepressants like PROZAC can mess with and lower one's libido; so what happens chemically when someone is taking synthetic estrogen or synthetic testosterone???...
Sexual attraction is in the brain so these synthetic hormones are changing the individual brain.
Correct. This is the point of the video haha
yes i took antidepressants and antipsychotics for a long time and now i don't have a libido at all and i gained a lot of weight
You cannot change your orientation but you can change your behavior. This is very much the catholic church way of thinking. Love the sinner, hate the sin & all that jazz. It is depressing to see us regressing but at this point, we deserve what is coming.
Nobody needs to act on sexual impulse. .
@@lovelocked5385literally everybody does.
Christians are the most hypocritical people I’ve ever met in my entire life. They say everything happens for a reason, then shame, hate and blame people for “going against” their beliefs about how things “should be.” Since no one can choose their orientation or sexual identity, then it would stand to reason that THAT TOO happens naturally and for a reason. I mean, humanity is over populated because all those holy straight people can’t stop having accidental pregnancies. Gay people balance that out. Nature will always strive to reach homeostasis, and it happens in ways we can and can’t perceive. The arrogance and self righteousness it takes to use one’s personal religion to oppress an entire group of people is nothing short of astounding to me.
but they don't have to @@ivydark9741
The entire nation could use a major Behaviour Modification.
The Pray away the Gay crowd are convinced gay comes from trauma. Why waste your time on them.
Also, correlations does not mean causation. I think it's safe to assume that the vast majority of people has gone through trauma, life being as it is. Could there still be some bias between trauma and change in sexual orientation? Like, what if the person was actually bi to begin with and the trauma made them gravitate towards one end of the spectrum?
This is the one debate that makes my head spin, because suddenly it seems that bisexuality cease to exist and there is only homosexual or heterosexual. That to me implies that people on both sides come with a huge amount of bias and an agenda to push, without considering this huge space between homosexuality and heterosexuality that can actually account for the shortcomings of both sides of the debate.
There're just too many factors that could go into determining a person's orientation to claim that any one is the cause. Anyone who claims to "know" the answer is likely just heavily biased by their own personal beliefs.
preach! everyone forget about bisexuality:(
Personally I believe it's possible there's multiple causes for orientation and it's not just innate for everyone and not caused by environmental factors for everyone.
However if I had to assume it is one specific thing, I would think everyone is inherently bisexual and the environment around them molds them subconsciously towards a specific sex: Think how with overcrowded environments in the Rat Eutopia experiment caused a spike in homosexual rats, vs sparse environments caused most if not all of the rats to be heterosexual.
Yep I never liked gay “pride” as it’s simply a normal fact for me, just like being proud of being tall or short or whatever natural characteristic.
Good take. It would be like bragging that you have a certain eye color or that you're right or left-handed. You didn't earn it, you didn't ask for it, it's just a fact of your life.
Yep, at 70, I still say I’m no more proud of being gay than I am of having Grey eyes.
What I am is unashamed…but that doesn’t scan as well on a float…or those rediculous Speedos.
@@scotthix2297and see when we say we’re not proud of being gay, that it’s just a fact, we’re told that’s our inner homophobia speaking. Didn’t know I needed to go to parades & street parties to be proud anyway.
yes, exactly!!!
You know that in this context Pride means ‘not ashamed’ don’t you? Because in the early 1970’s shame was what most gay people felt.
No, my orientation has never wavered from childhood to 58. I will not be asked to reassess or otherwise think about changing that.
Same here. Thank you.
When I was in highschool I was convinced I was bi mostly cuz of the influence of my friends my school and the media I consumed now I’m 24 and I’m like wtf did I do back then all I want now is a husband 😂😂😂
Same! Most of my friends were dating their same sex, I was fascinated by queer culture and I badly wanted to be part of it. I dated a girl when I was 16, and my first kiss was with a female friend when I was 14. But nowadays at 28 all I want is dick lol I love manly men, I don't know how I managed to have feelings for girls when they just don't do it for me.
Most partners of found from people s own friends.
Yeahhh it’s these phases we go through like in high school there was this fascination with masculine looking girls (it’s not like I wanted to actually marry one) but this interest but I believe it had to do with what I was going through at the time, and society’s negative attacks at men.
We're twins, (fraternal?) I decided I must be bi in high school, but when I was 24 realized I'm gay.
I grew up in a culture where I was terrified to be gay and didn't believe it was an "option" for me. Repression, long story, yadda yadda.
I do not believe homosexuality can be a response to trauma. Being asexual can, or only being with one gender when you are attracted to both, but not being gay. Trauma cannot change where someone is on the Kinsey scale. If the person is straight and avoids intimacy, they will just avoid sex and relationships. If the person is bi, trauma can drive them away from the gender that abused them. But people can't become same sex attracted. I don't believe trauma can change body chemistry that much. I know someone who was brutally traumatized and is still straight.
While I do enjoy speculating and learning about the world, the more I delve into topics like this, the more I understand the whole movement from the early 2000s of dropping labels and just letting people *be.* Does it truly matter to know the root cause of these things? IMO it doesn't, what matters in the end is to live a fulfilling life.
“Situational homosexuality” is rarely discussed, but is rampant in prisons and the military. Men stuck on a ship or incarcerated for several years without seeing a woman. Don’t drop the soap!
Are they just after the feel of it or are they attracted to men after prison?
@@ElinWinblad it's a very complicated subject but at a very basic level sex is a must for men
@@DoctorMehDoubtful. Millions of men have lived and died as virgins. Sex is not a biological necessity for anyone. Also, using men in prison as a parallel to men in general society is not accurate. People in prison are typically there because they lack impulse control.
Gay for the stay.
Lots of people guys who cannot get a woman for whatever reason, turn to guys for a sexual outlet. After they do this for a long time, they can identify as gay... even if they originally tried to be with women, but were unable. It CAN be a learned thing with guys. Women generally don't have the same problem. There is always a willing partner. That being said, many women in prison do seem to turn into lesbians.
I'm not attracted to anyone or anything. Never felt it in 27 years of my life. Ive had no trama, it's just the way I am. I learned that I'm asexual and aromatic a long time ago.
Telling someone to stop being gay is same as telling someone stop being straight. It doesnt make sense.
As a bisexual female, I have been attracted to males and other females for as long as I can remember. Ever since I was little I knew I wanted to marry another girl.
Then I experienced sexual abuse by several men and once by a woman during my childhood. During my tweens and early teen years I heavily suppressed my attraction from the male sex and identified as lesbian. The abuse from that woman didn't effect me as badly as the several men did. I wasn't actually a lesbian... but the attraction or even thought of engaging in sexual activity with a man horrified me and I couldn't tolerate it. I rejected it completely. During my mid-late teens to currently I've been working through the trauma by admitting I am attracted to men, no matter how painful it was to admit to myself, and began the healing journey.
Now I am 18 and relatively comfortable, for the most part, expressing sexuality comfortably about the opposite-sex. I still have PTSD from sexual abuse in-general but I'm at a much better place then I ever was before.
I’m so so sorry you went through that. You are loved. May God wrap his arms around you and watch over you now and protect you from any future evil. ❤
Jesus your so young to have gone through all that. Im glad your in a better place .
It amazes me how different out minds react to trauma. I've always bene attracted to men and women. But sexual abuse from 4-17 by 2 different guys pushed me into being promiscuous. I think deep down my subconscious thought if I just sleep with any guy who wants it then they can't force it and I gave some control. I pushed my attraction to women way down inside me because I grew up being told it was a sin. So I dove head first into men even when I didn't want it
@@kickazz9473I relate to this!
I was bi growing up but my best friend at the time sexually assaulted me after spending months emotionally abusing and gaslighting me. I already had some traumatic experiences with exclusively women (namely my physically abusive older sister) but after that I couldn't stand the sight of the female body, not even my own, for years. I recovered from the PTSD after about 9 years but I still have a strong bias that leads me to be untrusting of other women, and I still can't get aroused over the female body anymore (though I do have some female personality-based crushes now)
I wish you the best of luck with your PTSD recovery. I know how difficult it is. If I may offer a suggestion with the hope it helps you as much as it helped me: Anger over my body/brains reaction to the trauma was the biggest driving force for making progress with recovery. Anger is a powerful emotion if wielded correctly.
That argument of "If everyone was gay then humanity would go extinct." makes no fucking sense. That's like saying "People say you should eat kale because it's good for you. But if you ate nothing but kale, you'd die."
Most ppl are heterosexual leaning, the trans guy liking women then loving men just means he was always heterosexual leaning. Being gay/homosexual is simply more rare. Just facts. Not that complicated. And yes trauma influences our sexuality but I don’t think it changes actual gay ppl to not be gay. It can cause suppression of sexuality.
This may be the engineer in me, but I've always seen nature as you broad tuning and nurture as your fine tuning.
Trauma (or anything else) can't turn someone that is gay straight or even bi. Honestly, the few "successes" that people like to show with terrible ideas like conversion therapy, IMO, are really just naturally Bi people that had a predominantly same sex preference (and in this case I do think that's the right word) that haven't REALLY changed, just chosen to focus on the opposite sex attraction that they could already experience, just to a lesser or less frequent degree. Nothing has really changed for that person, but from the outside it can look like a big change.
I hate the phrase "genital preferences" because it's the hijacking of "sexual orientation."
PE: Makeup is a fantastic film. I watched it a few weekends ago and highly recommend everyone should give it a watch ❤
Genital preference is real. You can completely be attracted to women yet still prefer the big D.
It's all about hi-jacking the language.
Well, if trauma can influence sexual orientation by modifying brain chemistry, could not healing from said trauma change the chemistry back?
What is "healing"? If I use aversion therapy to change an undesired behavior, I would claim I was healing my patient. My method of aversion can be from a gentle admonition to severe physical pain. All done in the name of healing.
Thanks for recommending "Makeup", I enjoyed it. It was a good reminder to be sensitive to, keep an open mind to others' "twists", particularly if you can not personally relate.
The idea of considering organic physiological chemistry in the "trans" / "gay" / "straight" / "Bi" lifestyle is both fascinating and innovative. This was a thought provoking video. Thank you for posting this. I do believe this will elevate the quality of the conversation. Aaaaannnndddd merry fuckin Xmas to all ✌ ❤ 🍻 🎄
It's really not .There are gay people who have low testosterone, mid testosterone, and high testosterone. With this logic, gays wouldn't exist in certain ranges.
This whole gender thing is taking such an ugly turn. You can't change who you are, this actually makes me sad.
Most of these people don't even know who they, themselves are. These "changes" they're attempting are not self reflective, thus very circular.
So you say that about gender yet most of you anti trans people are here saying you can change being gay or straight just by a change in body chemistry? lol
@@MH-bw9zt I don't have a clue whose saying that, nor do I care. However it's apparent to me that many of the changes talked about by so called trans people are merely surface level. Such changes are only paramount to appearance and nothing else. This is no different from staunch idealists believing they can make the world a "better" place by simply coercing everyone to submit to their beliefs, while removing those who resist. Again, surface level thinking at best.
I've spoken to trans people, the ones who have actual gender dysphoria wish they didn't have it. It's painful for them to exist, or so they've told me anyway. These people were seeking help, but can't because insecure pinheads exploited them in the name of vanity. Between the ones who see them as flawed humans, and those who merely see them as ideological leverage, whose really dehumanizing the trans community? Get off of your high horse, they don't require YOUR salvation. What they need is to look inward.
I think it is innate. I met the perfect man in my early 20s, he worked, was respectful, extremely good looking, and had great taste in music. However I just could not go there. I was still discovering I was gay so that was that and I was not even clear why until a few years later. Definitely innate, at least with me.
SOCIETALLY perfect man. There is no perfect man for me. Its like jumbo shrimp
An oxymoron
@@peppersanches412 Thank you for clarifying as I was very confused for a second. I was like, why would you say the perfect man is like one of the tastiest things on planet Earth if you don't like men? Do you just really not like shrimp? LOL
People get hung up on a subjective description-"the perfect man" (most attractive man for him, at least at the time)-and forget his message: the attraction was innate for him.
@@RenanteTomas1972people often are too literal when it comes to interpreting opinions, when people make these kind of statements they generally just mean "the perfect man (to me)".
Or what about when people go to prison, and they call it, "gay for the stay"?
There is research showing that Endocrine blockers (which are sadly in a lot of our food supply) can possibly affect kids identifying as the opposite sex. This needs more looking into.
This is definitely a major cause but ppl don’t even want to hear this because it means that it’s not normal to be that way and it’s been caused by something while everyone wants to think is normal and it should be celebrated. I have nothing against being gay, I have been bi in the past but bc of desire for experimentation. But I don’t think is normal to have all these gays...nature works with a male and female, that’s how the world continues...and we can be modern and have advanced science to change sex and all that, but in nature being gay is an anomaly, there’s not many animals that would be gay, it can happen but it would be a very small number. Now it’s so prevalent, that either ppl pretend to be or there’s something wrong going on...but ppl don’t want to hear it and I’m sure I’m going to receive nasty replies bc of what I just wrote!
There is also evidence that stress in pregnant women can result in more "male-like" behaviour in female children, what used to be called a "tomboy". Xeno-estrogens have been shown to change the genitalia in water-bound species. Its a very large issue given how many man-made chemicals are xeno-estrogens.
ummm that's not how any of this works lmao
@@blazegaming6097 you are uninformed, many studies point to endocrine blockers in our environment contributing to gender dysphoria, do your research before you dismiss others.
Merry Xmas from Australia! Santa can I get lesbians uncancelled for Christmas worldwide???
The real question should be are people what they do or how they feel/think? Do actions really speak louder than words?
Are people actually homosexual/heterosexual or are they just people who engage homosexual/heterosexual behavior. There is merit in both schools of thought, and limits to how relevant each can be.
Like at what point are your feelings more important than reality? Especially in a society shared with others.
👏👏👏 I agree 💯
Is it not both?
Yes, completely upending your endocrine system and taking cross sex hormones changes your physical desires.
*This is shocking to precisely no one*
Physical desires... you must be a dude. Orientation is who you have the capacity to have a crush on. Men seem to have forgotten the difference between finding someone attractive and being attracted TO them. Difference is butterflies....
Your comment is the reason ppl think kids cant be gay. Cuz thats sexual blah blah. ATTRACTION OVER SEXXXXXXXX
@@peppersanches412 And you, like every other lefty afflicted with magical thinking seems to forget the brain (the organ you experience thoughts with) is a part of the body.
I continue to be appalled by the use of "queer". It's a slur, not a description of your sexual orientation and it's disgusting.
Merry Christmas to you appreciate your content. Don’t agree with everything but always appreciate your views
I think “conversion” is something that is confused by bisexuals, who are attracted to and functional with both sexes. There is a tendency to use either/or on any homosexual activities by activists on both extremes. There is a great deal of “not admitting” one is “truly” gay or “truly” straight.
You can think whatever you want or you could look at studies that show there are people who are completely gay and then change. It happens a lot but gets ignored. It may not be your experience, but that doesn’t mean your experience is typical.
@@Disgruntled_Canadian then we’d have to presume that there are people who are completely straight who change, and there are. But I would doubt that these “heterosexuals” never had a single gay thought, just as I doubt “heterosexuals” never had a straight thought. The only reason some people can radically change their sexual orientation is through taking opposite sex hormones especially testosterone, a fact which emphasises how tied to biology sexual orientation is.
@No_name860 why do you mention people who are "completely gay and then change" (douvtful), and not people who are conpletel6 straight and then change? Also, where are these studies? Kinds sounds like you're pushing "ex-gay therapy".
@@fredricks8701 check this person’s other comments. I’d say they’re pushing conversion therapy.
@@littlecatfeet9064unsurprising. They’re always there pushing this nonsense but never apply it to themselves and “leaving straightness”
Most likely they are bisexual and so they are comfortable with dating the opposite sex, not because they are recovered, but because they are bisexual.
I knew without knowing that I knew when I was five, even my mom saw it before I did, I was born this way and figured it out as soon as I hit puberty, was never abused or molested just naturally discovered it.
My best friend was sexually abused as a child and ended up transitioning. I fully believe it was to escape being a girl in order to feel protected.
This is a confusing subject. I suppressed my attraction to women most of my life. I was convinced I was a "hopelessly heterosexual woman". And then came menopause, a seven year phase of asexuality, and now only women interest me. My girlfriend was always homosexual, tried to suppress it and got married to a man, and is now bisexual. She tried to pray the gay away. It did not work. I always presumed homosexuality was coupled with mental health issues, only to discover that being lesbian is good for my mental health.
God bless girl
Congratulations on finding your true self. It’s never too late 💜
"My girlfriend was alwas homosexual"
"She is now bisexual."
She was always bi hun
always
Menopause lack of estrogen or too much? I forget 😅 I remember vegans who were asexual became sexual after going off vegan diet and also did a 180 on not wanting kids. Hormones do alot of directing our attraction and wants /needs
Another great, thought-provoking stream, thank you Arielle & Happy Holidays to everyone.
I have definitely experienced a change in sexuality from trauma. I came out at 14 as bisexual, but spent the latter part of my teens and early twenties with an abusive man. The next 5 years I was convinced that I was a lesbian and just hadn't figured that out in my teens, I even came out to my family as a lesbian. It wasn't until my mid twenties when I began healing emotionally that my attraction to men came back. I think sexuality is mostly innate/something that is developed in utero but I'm no scientist (for reference I was raised in a heteronormative household and raised as a Catholic).
I cannot stand the religious arguments.
This is a topic so rarely spoken of, I'm so glad you are the brave warrior of truth that you are.
I think everyone has slight bi tendencies, or lets be honest no woman would every really be able to judge the attractiveness of another woman, same with men, they just wouldn't recognize it in the same gender. Being gay however, I have seen both ways, born with it and because of trauma. Those born with it need to be left alone to grow into themselves, just like anyone else. Those with trauma need therapy BADLY. The problem with trauma related gayness (I'm not sure what word to use) is that sometimes they heal and grow out of it, sometimes they end up bi, and sometimes they just embrace it. I know four people molested/raped as children/teens, all girls, one was mentally disabled already and it seriously messed her up further, one was quite young and simply cannot find her sexuality (she currently calls herself pansexual) while the other two became lesbians. One totally embraced that and is currently in a healthy lesbian relationship. The other was traumatized at the onset of puberty and throughout junior high and high school was completely lesbian, didn't even like watching romance movies with straight people, had problems (serious problems not regular child issues) with the idea that her parents had sex. Her parents got her into therapy as soon as they found out about the trauma incidents but they did not find out until years after it happened so she lived with it for a long time without help. But she has recently fallen in love with a man, we were all completely shocked, and they will soon be married. Did her sexuality change? Did she get over her trauma? Is she actually bi now? Or did she just fall in love? We don't know and can't really say, but we're happy she is in love and getting married regardless of those answers.
I had trauma and a pretty bad one and caused by a MAN and im still gay as fuck. LOL trauma did not change my sexual orientation. I never liked women or vaginas, i just like men and dicks even the one who caused my trauma was a man.
My white friend was r'd by a black man at 13. She only has relations with black men. None of them were good men either. So, it can twist the other way too and they gravitate towards those who are similar to the trauma.
I can recognize when another man is attractive, but that does not mean that I am attracted to them - everyone does not "have slight bi tendencies". Deep trauma can do many quite extensive injuries to the brain, especially if experienced while growing up and the brain is more plastic and epigenetic pathways are still open to experience.
I'm a straight woman and I acknowledge an attractive woman when I see one, usually in the way of compliments "I love your dress, I very your hair" etc etc.
I've had LGBT friends try to convince me it means I'm a lesbian or bi, when in reality I'm straight and can see a pretty person and compliment them on being pretty of aspects that I find pretty. It doesn't mean I want to date them. Lmao
Yeah. No. Everyone has "bi tendencies" because they can recognize if someone of the same sex is attractive? That's literally the most asinine take I've ever heard. I can recognize beautiful animals, but I have no desire to have sex with them. I can recognize beautiful flowers, same thing. Recognizing beauty in people is no different. Please, don't ever become a therapist.
It is possible for these people to be bisexual, because they can live a normal life and practice love and sex which are basic things in life. Unlike lesbians and gays, they cannot force themselves to be of the opposite sex, even if they try. In the end, they will return to dating the same sex as them. There is a woman in this program who says that she is bisexual and She says she has recovered from her attraction to females and married a male. This is possible because she is attracted to males. A lesbian will not be able to do this. I think that bisexuals can overlook and ignore their homosexuality. Now they have another outlet and a relationship with the opposite sex.
Religious practices are choices. My gay is not a choice, but what I did choose is to live my life as the gay man I am without shame or guilt or regret.
The moment any God is referenced in a conversation about sexuality or sexual orientation… the conversation is over.
Coming off the pill can change your orientation (and at least affect your preferences in men, you know?)
Any number of bisexual women will tell you that things change. It's a thing that happens.
I feel like it is a dissonanced take to deny chemistry can be altered due to trauma. Our feelings, our thoughts, and our attraction are all hormones/chemistry of the brain. Our neurotransmitters absolutely change through stress, as do our serum hormone levels.
If we change our physical chemistry (neurotransmitter, serum hormones, and as a result our pheromones and our prefered receptive pheromones), our attraction can certainly be altered.
I don't think you can change it.
My theory is that bisexuality is a huge spectrum with different degrees of same sex attraction, hence some people don't feel it until they experience it.
I'm also like you, born gay naturally
Stop with the spectrums. None of this stuff is a spectrum. So dumb.
@@--------RR007----------bisexuality is very much a spectrum. I am bi, I am sexually attracted to both sexes, but have a heavy preference for women, never developed romantic feelings for men even when I was trying to and always daydreamed about a relationship with a woman, but there are bi people who are the exact opposite of me.
The competition to be most unique is nauseating as is the religiosity. And few of the assertions have any grounding in science.
"Can you link it to the Bible?" I think i injured my eyeballs with that eyeroll
Happy holidays.
i think there's nuances to this. i believe you have to have it in you for you to feel attraction to one gender or another. it could be latent bisexuality that manifests due to hormones pushing you to lower your guard and pursue the sexual experience. then coupled with enjoying it and not being dismissive of the experience, it then feels like a new door opened
When you bring in a religious text, rational, fruitful, helpful convesation is impossible.
This reminds me of an episode of ANTM (America's Next Top Model) when i watched as a teenager back in the 2000's. One of the shows had a lesbian girl who once said she was sexually assaulted by a men and she got traumatized, and "that's how she became lesbian".
But it feels like traumatized are not exactly changed person, like they used to like/behave this but now likes/behaves that, but they became a person with a blocked feeling/emotion.
is it possible to get over your trauma? To overcome it with therapy, psychology and/or psychiatry? Now I'm genuinelly curious lmao
These mental gymnastics are INSANE. How decadent to have the luxury of being so narcissistic rather than expending your energy on surviving and bettering the world you exist in.
There's purpose to having the conversation. Conversation is good. Debating different ideas is fantastic, especially if the topic is triggering or hot button. I've changed my mind so many different times in my life, sometimes back to my original ideas, and it's made me (to get anecdotal) a more compassionate human being. Just my 2cents (and probably worth even less, lol)
Thanks for making this video Arielle. I am a 53 years old ex-transwoman from Malaysia who is living his wonderful life. I respect people’s choices and I appreciate if people would respect mine in return. Ex-LGBTQ people like me do exist. I have often been told shut up but I don’t think I can.
Then you weren't LGBT in the first place. You were just confused.
@@nicolas_dsr you think so? 😇 Most welcome to subscribe to know who I really am before assuming with your assumptions. ❤️
@@reallovemalaysia this isn't something you can either turn on or off, sexual orientation does not change.
@@nicolas_dsr thanks for sharing your opinion, yet no one can nullify my life experience. Most welcome to subscribe.
This video reminded me of Arielle’s early days, which I like much better than the culture wars that took over LGBT+ convos since 2020.
I am one of those “used to be” lesbians who now likes men. Lotta things have changed in my life. I always struggled with my relationships with women, and was always sexually frustrated and really beat myself up about it and about my secret attractions to men- I just thought men were jerks not to be trusted and my romantic attachments to women felt safer and more close and trusting. Plus women really went for me, and although men liked me, it wasn’t as easy for me to get to know them and to form binds with them. I was with women for over 30 years, and had many serious relationships with beautiful cool intelligent women- so I definitely tried it out fully! But I always felt something was lacking and it would kill the relationship eventually (my poor girlfriends!) I do feel that it came from some unhealed stuff, and now that I have healed some of that my natural attraction for men is blossoming and my friendships with women are naturally more platonic and I am happy to be able to get close to women without the pressure of sex/dating. But this is just my story. Can’t speak for anyone else.
@@neko7606i never tried but i have had thoughts even gratifying ones lol with being with the opposite gender. Heterosexuality being predominant is a major truth.
Your experience is far more common then these lgbtq activists will have you believe.
STRESS and Chronic Stress has been scientifically proven to alter the body's chemistry, i.e. brain chemistry. CPTSD and PTSD have also been proven to change our chemistry via STRESS. How every individual handles their stress is an entirely different subject. Be healthy, stay safe and many blessings....and Happy Holidays. Morgan
Sometimes I feel pron affected my sexuality. I knew I was gay at 15, but started watching gay pron at age 13-14.
Before then, I had crushes (nothing sexual) on girls.
On one hand, I feel pron could have made me gay. On the other hand I realize “why would you search it if you weren’t attracted to men?”
I just wonder if pron made me gay.
I’m a BIG believer in your environment playing a major role in sexual preference. Otherwise sexuality wouldn’t be as fluid as we now know it is. Why did you search for gay pron? Probably curiosity especially if you started looking for it when you were young. Kids are very curious. And by continuing to watch it you are reinforcing those desires. If you forced yourself to only looking at straight pron, I’m willing to bet you would start liking it eventually, same goes for any habit.
@@Disgruntled_Canadian To this day boobas don’t turn me on, but “man parts” do.
I was actually exposed to straight porn on Snapchat, but was just grossed out.
PREFERENCE. LOL.
I prefer winning the lottery to being skinned alive.
GAY IS NOT A PREFERENCE
What type of porn were you watching? Gay porn?
it could have, it could not have, there are many who watch it and did not become gay. We're also in a society that if a girl was to do the same thing and watch lesbian, i don't think it would be as heavily judge than when a man looks at gay. Plus depending on why you chose porn in the first place, the fact that anyone searches porn at all, is worth questioning. What need am I trying to fill, and why porn.
In any case porn is a destructive force for the reason where it blurs lines of what's a reality, and how we are meant to associate certain acts or scenarios. And if stimulated too young, it becomes a bit harder to detach and assess since its now becomes very familiar.
Orientation in general is created through series of patterns, not plain genetics. Even on a biological level its created through reinforcement of desires. What those patterns are i think is worth exploring and challenging.
Thank you so much for going into this. I would love for you to bring on Buck and further extrapolate on this!
I recently discovered something about myself. I may be asexual. I’m not sure if if it’s naturally because it’s low s3x drive and/or I had trauma when I was R at 14. Because of that, so many things happened after that. Either way, I just can’t connect with others when they talk about s3x. I pretend I do but I don’t
I don’t have s3x until I’m in a relationship and when I do, it’s to please the other person. They aren’t the problem, I am.
Im 23 btw
First there is nothing wrong with not having sex unless your in a relationship, that is actually how it should be. Do not fall into the new world order/liberal idea of having to have a label for a made up sexuality. Go see a doctor for some mental health work and get your hormone levels checked.
Well, you shouldn’t feel the need to have sex with anyone you’re not in a relationship with anyway. That is quite normal. Sleeping around with everybody is what’s NOT normal.
Right. It is gross outside a relationship.
@@Disgruntled_Canadian I said I don’t have s3x until I’m in a relationship
Also I don't appreciate the use of the insulting slur "queer" by the LGTBQ+ community.
The human mind is programable.
It definitely is.
I've always leaned more to an understanding of a spectrum when it comes down to sexual orientation. This would indeed allow some to "convert" more easily, but what these people fail to acknowledge is that, for such a spectrum to exist, you need two polar opposite extremes. So yeah, some might lean more to one side or the other, but there are people that just won't ever change, on both sides of that spectrum. And that should definitely be ok and acceptable. Maybe we are complicating things just too much.
I believe pretty much this, most people are some level of bisexual (from full bisexuals to someone who would go gay for one celebrity) but there are still 100% homo and hetero people. I myself am a lesbian and have absolutely zero interest in males
Using the lord as argument 🥳🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Why is there a discussion in the first place? Nobody should care if someone is attracted to the same or opposite sex or if that attraction changes. There is always this religious agenda behind those discussions that treats homosexuality as immoral.
LGB.T..Q. NOT one community. L, G, and B are sexual orientations. T is at least 4 or 5 different things. Q is a political ideology.
0:33 !! The panic button is also a youtube channel with non leftist lesbians!
All this new ideas of labelling and categorising ones sexual proclivities and feelings of self. Is so damaging and confusing, to the youth of today. It's getting wholly ridiculous.
Stop searching for explanations of why you are, the way you are. Just BE THE WAY YOU ARE.. You have nothing to apologise for. And nobody to apologise to.
Just BE who you are. Because who you are, is quite simply YOU!!
There are many animals that can be gay naturally, it is not a condition that is only in humans. To me this means, that it is not a choice, it is a natural biological state for some.
Hey, I completely get what you’re saying. I never was sex***ly abused and have always just liked men. But I do think there are people who are sex***ly abused who think they should just be gay men or lesbian when in reality they aren’t. They see it as a “safe space” away from their trauma. And while that’s good for them, I don’t think they should be using gay men and lesbians as a way to escape their trauma or the spaces built for actual homosexuals. It’s something entirely diffferent than being naturally homosexual, and I want them to get the help they need without attaching themselves to this space which was made for actual gay men and lesbians. It’s not right, and I especially think a lot of (for all intentions and purposes) straight women do this A LOT. Of course, I welcome bi men and women too; it’s just not the right place for sex***ly abused people to congregate too. They need to seek therapy and help. Before looking for an easy out for their trauma, cause it really does impact negatively a lot of the actual gay men, lesbians, and bi men and women, turning us into basically caricatures of what LGB means and just justifies a lot of ignorant viewpoints of people. I sympathize with people who have experienced that, but that does not mean this is your space.
People making declarations to earn their cards, and Arielle is trying hard not to loose hers.
The amount of contradictions and mental gymnastics is mind-blowing. It would be easier to just say that they are probably bisexual rather than this bs.
People should just mind their own business, be kind and respectful, and leave other people the hell alone. Great video. You nailed it again. Wise words.
But all the hate comes from the lgbtq people.
I feel like if sexual trauma causes u to like the same sex or opposite ur not actually whatever ur trying to choose bc ur not really choosing it ur just acting off trauma instead of really being into it. I hope that makes sense
Ya know ive thought about this before. My cousin was graped on her way home from school in 9th grade. Prior to that happening to her, she liked boys....A LOT lol. We were both kinda boy crazy, but a couple years after she started dating girls, and she gained a lot of weight. Like over double her normal size. We never spoke about it but i always assumed both of those things changing about her had to do with what she experienced. This happened about 20 years ago. In the last 6 years or so, she started seeing men again. Recently got married and had her first child last year. So i guess its possible she was just experimenting but imho i think she changed the way she looked and her preferences due to that trauma n even though that trauma is still there i think she has come to terms with it n is now living her best life.
"i think she changed the way she looked and her preferences due to that trauma" first, i want to say that i'm sorry about what happened to your cousin. but i have to respond to this sentence. trauma does not change sexual orientation. trauma can make a straight woman afraid of men, but it does not make a woman FEEL ATTRACTION TO OTHER WOMEN. Attraction is either there or it's not. Trauma does not cause sexual attraction to a specific sex. It's very likely that your cousin is bisexual.
For the luv of God do not break the mic 😂😂
I've been through similar to you with being in emotionally abusive relationships with women and I still have romantic attraction to other women.
I think that setting and living a boundary affect us as much if not more so than trauma. Our pain isn’t the only way to change and grow, pleasure is also guides us.
05:29 if this was a person who was a lesbian and a man hater, then I wonder what motivated this person to become a man at that point when the disgust is so big. She was always interested in men and suppressed all of that. To me it sounds like she didn't want to live that out as a woman for sexist patriarchal reasons and didn't want to expose herself being available to men as a woman. And you can also hear a jealousy about not being able to do what men do/can do. but as a man she can accept it more easily. Many women find gay men and the gay life attractive. There is also a trend for women to want to become a gay men.
Just from a logical perspective, the fact that there are people who convince themselves they are heterosexual due to family or peer group pressure only to admit at some point that they were homosexual all along suggests that there are also people who experience pressure from family or peer group to be homosexual and convinced themselves they are, only to admit later that they were actually heterosexual.
I believe homosexuality is innate. However now it’s more normalized, I believe a lot of straight, bisexual, people due to sexual trauma or what have you, become convinced they are gay consciously or unconsciously to avoid the earlier trauma. For these people it’s not innate. It can change ‘spontaneously’. (Aka it seems spontaneously but it isn’t they’re not homosexual)
pray the gay away is so ironic but should be spelled prey🧐.
This is a very complicated subject but the short answer is. Yes you can “stop” being gay. People often don’t even understand their own desires till they’re older. They can change at times. You cannot be “converted” or forced to stop being gay though. One’s sexuality is not given at birth. It evolves as they grow and interact with the environment they are born in.
7:35 Conversion "Therapy" is Trauma Based Mind Control
Love the topic and you! ❤
Arielle, I love you! Merry Christmas! I appreciate your voice cutting through all this nonsense.
It's an interesting subject that doesn't really have any easy answer. There are so many factors that go into determining your sexual orientation that we don't really know if there's any that are more influential than others. There's body chemistry as was mentioned in the video. There's also a whole host of psychological issues like trauma responses or possibly some mental illnesses. How you're raised likely plays a role, as well as personal beliefs. There's also the possibility of the physical structure of the brain playing some role.
I don't see us getting a better understanding of this subject anytime soon. Everyone seems to have an opinion on the nature versus nurture question, and pretty much any research done on the subject is likely to be biased depending on the what the researchers themselves believe on the subject.
As for whether conversion therapy can work, I'm quite certain that some methods could work on some people. It's essentially a form of psychological programming and indoctrination after all. The real question is whether it's ever morally acceptable to use those methods on another person and why you would even want to. It's also interesting to note that at least some of the techniques used for conversion are very similar to those used in drug and alcohol treatment, and in cult indoctrination.
Makeup looks like a really good movie!
Just curious: is it only me and my friends?... when I talk with my gay (or sometimes bi) friends, somehow all too often an "early experience" / molestation comes up as a "catalyst to learn about themselves". I am trying to put it nicely for the delicate nature of the subject, but is it a common pattern or did just my friends have a bad life?
molestation by someone of the same sex?
I love your exploration of this. But the quick editing and very short clips makes it hard to follow and leaves me wanting more.
ow wow the makeup teaser looked amazing love that style film and its britishhhh plus! gna go check it out will obv click your link .hah
Cool stuff! Keep it up, sis! 👍
There's no such thing as an 'ex-gay'. NO SUCH THING. There are such things as people caught up in faith communities being pressured to believe they can be 'ex-gay' and 'delivered'. This is insidious and dangerous and needs to be resisted and challenged by us all
There is research, mostly from Scandinavian countries, that shows that (for a small percentage of people) sexuality can be malleable. Typically abuse is the cause. Also, most of these people are genetically ambiguous towards sexuality. The significant majority of these people are female.
This is a small percentage of the population. But all of LGBT population is a small percentage.
Is it showing it's actually malleable or are they just confused?
There're put climactic in the water that are turning the freaking frogs gay.
Then how do you explain people like me? I'm asexual and aromantic.
You are the most unique and special snowflake out there!
I would say you need to seek counseling to try to understand and correct the fact that you have no sexual or emotional/romantic attraction to other people (preferable to the opposite sex) as this a normal behavior for human beings
@@BearPawSwipe 🤣
You either have an extremely low sex drive or you've shut down due to some trauma.
It's not that difficult to surmise what's going on with people like you.
Sexuality is formed around deep need inside of us based on emotion, trauma and needs that are inside us. You can't change that without changing the inner emotional needs. And that's almost impossible.
I really don’t believe that anyone can make generalisations about how things are for a group based on their personal experiences as a member of the group. If a man says he successfully “prayed the gay away”, accept his truth about his own experience. You can only ever speak from your own experience.
There is also a clause of denial with so many have
I agree completely. Pretty sick of seeing gay people calling ex-gays liars just because it doesn’t fit their experience. Everyone’s experience is different and many studies show that that are far more Ex-gays then actual Gay people. Also, newer research shows that sexuality is very fluid especially among women.
@@Disgruntled_Canadian Well, some ex-gays are actually bi without wanting to admit it, so that would at least mean some dishonesty. Also there are studies into the efficacy of conversion therapy to turn gays and lesbians straight (sorry, just woke up so can’t remember said studies but they’re easy to find). The findings? It doesn’t take. People do not magically become heterosexual.
First, I want to point out that there's no such thing as "his truth." There's just THE truth, either it worked for him, or it didn't. That said, the people that want to argue with the guy over it are only saying their own opinions based on their own biases. They're not saying the truth because they don't actually know what it is, just what they want it to be. As far as I know, maybe it did work for him, or maybe he's just in denial or repressing something. I don't know, and it's not my place to say.
@@Disgruntled_Canadianthere is a big difference between being now sexually attracted to the opposite sex and genuinely enjoying it and forcing and coercing yourself for the sake of "greater good". Obviously, there is no way no know which case is true with such people because we can't read anybody's mind. But if everyone is sexually fluid, it's not a big deal to have any orientation possible because it can change in the future, furthermore, according to this concept most people are bisexual or whatever it's called nowadays