“People definitely called me out”: Nate & Serena return

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  • Опубліковано 2 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 297

  • @ramitsethi
    @ramitsethi  3 дні тому +14

    00:00 Download the Conscious Spending Plan so you can use your money GUILT-FREE: iwt.com/csp-youtube
    Please remember: These are real people who had the courage to come on my podcast and ask for help. Would you be willing to come on this podcast and share every detail of your financial life? Feel free to leave comments based on what you think, but remember that we are here to help in a supportive way, not to demean and criticize.

    • @BethClevidence
      @BethClevidence 3 дні тому

      thanks for follow up about these people is so realistic have more whether is so positive or not appreciate the growth in them

  • @charliegolding9439
    @charliegolding9439 3 дні тому +242

    Hell yeah. I finished residency and got my big boy job in 2018. By 2023, I had paid off all my debt, cash-flowed my wife's master's degree, moved to a nicer place, took my wife to Europe, and still have about a 50% savings rate. This couple is like 7 -8 year younger version of us. Life is good.

    • @TheGhu123
      @TheGhu123 3 дні тому +10

      being a doctor = big shovel. I recall in our 20s when my friends were still in residency and just scraping by. Once he became a othro surgeon he was rolling in brand new bmw x5. His income went from 40k to 900k. They dont start making money until 30s.

    • @MLP12-z8r
      @MLP12-z8r 3 дні тому +4

      Amen. Finishing residency and paying off all student debt in 2016 has been the most liberating decision of my life. Being debt free is life changing.

    • @Natalie_11188
      @Natalie_11188 День тому +1

      @@charliegolding9439 you’re a rock star, thanks for sharing and giving other young residents and medical students light at the end of the tunnel.

    • @amolkoldhekar1293
      @amolkoldhekar1293 3 години тому

      Eff yeah, finally finishing up 7 years of residency/fellowship in 2025, that light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter and brighter

  • @nemat.e1670
    @nemat.e1670 3 дні тому +179

    Wow super impressed by Serena’s growth major props to her for learning and changing it’s pretty rare for someone to actually reflect and change their actions.

  • @rmj7
    @rmj7 3 дні тому +125

    "If it makes Nate happy, it makes me happy." I don't think the woman who was being interviewed last time would've ever said that. Good on her growth.

  • @StrongopinionsRus
    @StrongopinionsRus 3 дні тому +131

    I’m so impressed that Serena was even willing to come back on the show. I was truly appalled by her attitude on the original episode, but she’s really taken the criticism on board and changed. I’m glad they’re finally getting married and have a better relationship with money.

    • @saeedhossain6099
      @saeedhossain6099 3 дні тому +7

      hope you're right, sadly the pattern of behaviour I've witnessed by people who buy into the whole corporate maximizing and speaking in buzzwords (often called girl bossing but it's not exclusively a gendered concept), their moral compass swings wildly, and reforms tend to be contextualize as damage control. frankly, her outlook, even if reformed, I'm not sure has actually changed and won't simply be modified with the next round of pushback.

    • @entropy696
      @entropy696 2 дні тому +12

      @@saeedhossain6099 Respectfully, I think you're painting Serena in an overly cynical light without giving her actions the credit they deserve. Growth is a process, and while it's easy to dismiss someone as incapable of genuine change, Serena's willingness to not only revisit the show but also publicly address past behaviors shows accountability.
      Not everyone who embraces a corporate or ambitious outlook is morally bankrupt or driven solely by damage control. People can evolve. Just because someone has used buzzwords or embodied "girl boss" energy doesn't mean they’re inherently insincere or untrustworthy. Let's give credit where it's due instead of villainizing her for her past or doubting her ability to reform. Life's complex, and so are people.

    • @saeedhossain6099
      @saeedhossain6099 2 дні тому

      @@entropy696 I hope you're right, and once it's earned credit due can be credited. However, after the blowback in the comments on the original video, I imagine she saw her future Dr husband dreams turning into a mirage, and while she may reform to make that a future reality, whether it's short lived or a permanent change is yet to be seen. Wish them the best, reforming character is hard, worthy goal, but this specific situation reads as "what do I have to for the next quarterly target". once you add the stress of life, kids, finances that will require sacrifice, people tend to revert to their past behaviors - in her case that is bean counting on who did what got whom, resentment for having to carry some of someone else's load while negating the load that has been carried for them. For the couple, I genuinely hope I'm wrong, but the old head advice to a young blood, if he was my friend, I'd definitely say proceed with caution. cynical sure, but that is why lawyers exist, sadly - it's the advice my mom gave me, I'd offer him the same advice.

  • @ericablackwell647
    @ericablackwell647 3 дні тому +113

    I’m usually a silent viewer but I want to comment to give Serena her flowers. I completely understand her old mindset and have been there myself, but I’m so happy we received this update and to see how much she’s grown and changed while I’m in the process of doing that myself and healing those traditional values we grew up learning has eased my anxiety and given me hope. Loved this episode SO much! Great job Ramit.

  • @aas55
    @aas55 3 дні тому +82

    Transitioning from a resident into a “full fledged” doctor is wild. You go from a crushing work schedule to a better one and your salary multiplies by 4-10x overnight. We are not known for making good financial decisions either. Can’t say I made any crippling financial mistakes but I didn’t optimize things for 5 years post residency. Nate, please read Ramit’s books with your soon to be wife! The sooner you dial it in the better off you’ll be long term.

    • @arh1234
      @arh1234 3 дні тому +1

      There are legal restrictions on work hours for residents. Not so for attendings. Check contracts carefully. New grads can get worked to death with crazy call/night/etc schedules

    • @carlsophiabaker8856
      @carlsophiabaker8856 3 дні тому +3

      Read White Coat Investor Boot Camp, did wonders for my wife and I after finishing residency

    • @uranuswink8843
      @uranuswink8843 День тому

      @@arh1234 I've noticed first and second-year attending burnout has ticked up since the "real job" became harder than residency. Thanks, ACGME restrictions.

  • @malemaline
    @malemaline 3 дні тому +65

    It's great to see an update. Serena and Nate are super sweet and it takes courage to admit when you fall short or to even see that you aren't acting in ways you thought you were. It's great they are both so open to growth. I wish them all the best with their marriage.

  • @aloniapreston986
    @aloniapreston986 3 дні тому +61

    Serena we are so proud of you. So happy to see this relationship thriving

  • @MissGirl1450
    @MissGirl1450 3 дні тому +28

    I'm happy to see this couple return. It's great they're getting both singles and couples counseling. It makes so much more sense hearing that Serena's own parents have separate accounts 30 years later. We repeat what we see when we don't do introspection. Makes me wonder what habits I'm subconsciously re-creating. Have a great wedding.

  • @MiraMira0ntheWall
    @MiraMira0ntheWall 3 дні тому +46

    Serena you’ve helped me. My traditional thoughts and upbringing didn’t help my partner in this season. I’m working on it and adjusting through active help.

  • @marcenavar
    @marcenavar 2 дні тому +52

    I don’t really see any change in their relationship.
    They are still splitting almost everything 50/50, except for a little bit in rent. But he is spending a lot on gas, for example, and she is not helping him.
    She just took the credit, saying she changed, and he is protecting her by saying it’s his decision to pay almost the same.

    • @tylersosa8421
      @tylersosa8421 2 дні тому +11

      Yeah, was hoping Rhamit would have done better prying in this one. A lot of missed opportunity to dig deeper in their biggest issues they had in the first episode.

    • @F.O-j4p
      @F.O-j4p День тому +4

      A second episode was not needed. Nothing has changed other than him paying more expenses and her paying off her debt.

    • @uranuswink8843
      @uranuswink8843 День тому

      @@F.O-j4p Yeah. Things got better because he stopped (or never really started) advocating for himself...healthy.

    • @Phillyset
      @Phillyset День тому

      ​@@tylersosa8421 I've noticed rammit tends to not hold the women as accountable as he does the men. When he does push, it tends to be around the men.

    • @aaliyahcastleberry3494
      @aaliyahcastleberry3494 2 години тому

      This was my same thought!

  • @tylersosa8421
    @tylersosa8421 3 дні тому +47

    Am I missing something or did Serena totally disregard the advice for the two biggest issues in the first episode? Rent and picking up the tab. She’s paying less and Nate is paying more so definitely not the 65/35 split as suggested. And they still split the tabs out at restaurants unless she’s feeling some sort of way, “you know what, I’ve got this” is what she said. Like yeah, that was the point. I felt like there was some growth but in these major issues little change and a lot of justifications made.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +17

      Yes, a TON of long winded interruptions where she attempts to justify.

  • @javanbass6340
    @javanbass6340 3 дні тому +29

    Looking forward to this episode. Ramit doing strong work inadvertently calling out contradictions related to gender roles and financial growth between men and women

  • @funtechu
    @funtechu 3 дні тому +49

    Just one thing to note for Nate, make sure you get *own occupation* (own occ) disability insurance once you start your practice. Yours is a very special and specific talent, and if you do end up disabled at some point, you don't want to be denied disability insurance just because you can technically still work a retail job.

    • @AK_AF_LB
      @AK_AF_LB День тому +3

      This! But try to get it while still in fellowship. It is soooo much cheaper. My husband's was like 65% less for the same coverage.

  • @Natalie_11188
    @Natalie_11188 3 дні тому +8

    Thank you to this couple for coming back and giving us an update. I know it wasn’t easy.

  • @RennaeFogah
    @RennaeFogah 3 дні тому +26

    The growth in how they talk about money now is so evident. They are now laughing and reflecting. Our traumas really impact the way we operate. I wish them blessing and happiness! It would be fantastic to hear from them a few years from now.

  • @michellealexander6230
    @michellealexander6230 3 дні тому +14

    I cannot wait to hear from them in 2 more years. Great follow up.

  • @EndoExcision
    @EndoExcision День тому +3

    That they came back after seeing the prior episode is a testament to the truthfulness of your video editing and story telling. No “made for reality TV” edits, no subtle character assassinations to boost viewership a la “Indian Matchmaker.”
    It speaks to your (and their) integrity.

  • @HishamElSheshtawy
    @HishamElSheshtawy 2 дні тому +4

    Listening to this as I go into the new year, you have no idea how much hope it’s giving me in my relationship. Thank you.

  • @nancyklingler1335
    @nancyklingler1335 3 дні тому +18

    I love the update, hope you do many more of them!

  • @kman20
    @kman20 3 дні тому +21

    I’ve been waiting for this one all week long!

  • @arh1234
    @arh1234 3 дні тому +40

    I was so amazed at their progress until that bomb at the end when Serena is letting Nate carry a credit card balance from (likely fellowship interviews) while she insists on splitting the check, him paying near-equal rent, and her paying her loans down aggressively.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +14

      There was a LOT of subtle hints like this throughout the video if you rewatch it.

    • @samuelvenegas2889
      @samuelvenegas2889 3 дні тому +19

      Oh how I wish they would continue 50/50 with his new income. I would pay to see her face 😂 I’m sorry but she’s awful for not holding him down while he struggles and fully expects to reap the benefits of his new income.

    • @Wofnfkfnddoddbb
      @Wofnfkfnddoddbb 2 дні тому +4

      At the beginning she said things were great while Nate is clearly struggling. Energy levels are different.

    • @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma
      @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma 2 дні тому +6

      Respectfully, could Serena's "revelation" be due to the pending incoming big bucks and how people in the previous video advised him that Serena was not in it for the long run? I wish them the best however I hope her "revelation" is true.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому

      @ agreed

  • @coltonsimmons2767
    @coltonsimmons2767 3 дні тому +16

    I love honest sincere people! The point was never to be right, it was to answer honestly and learn about yourself! I think so much of this couple relate to my wife and I thank you for sharing!
    Also, a new Pod and Book on the same day. Ramit you’re getting a lot of my mental capacity today! Happy New Years Everyone! 🎉

  • @stephaniemejia4324
    @stephaniemejia4324 3 дні тому +12

    I love this! Please please please bring back Sara and Ken from episodes 80 and 81! I'm dying to see if they kept their kids in private school or not.

  • @stephaniemarquez988
    @stephaniemarquez988 2 дні тому +19

    The concern I have here is the script that continues to play for her in her head. The one surrounding her parents being transactional with one another around money and being very in love. I’m not downing that possibility but I will say that it will continue to enable her behavior to view it the same in her marriage. If she finds no flaw in how her parents manage money amongst one another and find them to be happy, then she subconsciously will do the same. Behaviors don’t change unless the outcome is not favorable in your sight. My only warning to them is that money is only the beginning. Wait until you have a home with more maintenance and chores and not to mention children (if that’s in their plans). Keeping tabs like the one she had over him is only going to create contempt in the marriage and it only gets worse as you expand the list beyond money. I pray that God blesses your union and that you both allow him to work through both of you into the partnership you can be.

  • @Mushroompanda648
    @Mushroompanda648 3 дні тому +21

    I would love to see them again in 3 years once they have lived a year with Nate's salary as a Doctor. I think it would be interesting. 😁

  • @samuelvenegas2889
    @samuelvenegas2889 3 дні тому +35

    After talking about him making upwards of 1 million a year she said “it’s a very fortunate position for both of us to be in”. I’m sorry but she’s god-awful. From hounding him to pay her back what is literal pennies compared to his future earnings and making him “treat her” while he was struggling and she was not to expecting to share this fortune is wild.
    If he were to get injured or sick and was not able to work, I don’t think she would hold him down based on these interviews.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +9

      💯 this 👏🏽. She is a walking red flag. How can a smart doctor not pick this up?

  • @Stephanie-vw3qq
    @Stephanie-vw3qq 2 дні тому +24

    I'm not buying Serena's apparent turnaround. She came across badly on the first video, and she realized it. I hope Nate gets a pre-nup before they get married.

  • @janesmith9628
    @janesmith9628 3 дні тому +19

    WOW only 25 minutes in and brought to tears. ROCK STAR COUPLE. You are both amazing. AND, I have never seen Ramit look SO SOoooooo PROUD!

  • @donnaallgaier-lamberti3933
    @donnaallgaier-lamberti3933 3 дні тому +31

    My husband came to our marriage in debt and a SPEND IT ALL attitude - no savings, no retirement, no investments. He did not own a home, has zero assets and he did not even own a car. I owned a small home, had investments and savings and I was willing to share everything I had. I did not mind his low income situation ($50,000 at his peak) but I was highly concerned about how we were going to retire since he was already age 50.We have spent the past 30 years paying off his debts, building our budget, catching up and savings for our retirement years. After all this time, I have realize managing money well is EMPOWERING!!!

  • @malemaline
    @malemaline 3 дні тому +9

    It's great to see this update. Hope we see more!

  • @CZwinterbliss
    @CZwinterbliss 3 дні тому +33

    The way she expressed her previous take on rent-it's not as if she's getting more rooms than Nate-made it feel like she still holds that perspective. Her change doesn't feel genuine, but rather like a calculation she's finally making. Maybe I'm just too much of a skeptic.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +8

      EXACTLY! If you are good at reading people it looks extremely calculated when she realized he’s close to making a ton of money. He’s just a toy to her that she can manipulate at her will.

    • @alphabetsoup848
      @alphabetsoup848 2 дні тому +2

      Actions sometime come before attitude she at least recognizes she needs to adjust and has taken the steps. Unlearning a life time of lessons tqke a lomg time , im proud of Serena

  • @loria606
    @loria606 3 дні тому +20

    Would love it if Ramit held space for Nate to actually speak in a meaningful way.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +4

      This is a GREAT way of putting it. Agreed. Ramit even asking Nate’s salary…Nate answers briefly…and then she jumps in about paying off loans aggressively, etc. like what!?!

  • @kiesh82
    @kiesh82 3 дні тому +5

    I love to see people be open to changing their perspective when presented with new info.

  • @dhonan141
    @dhonan141 День тому +14

    Please get the couple who invested 1 million dollars in oil project back on

    • @Capycorg
      @Capycorg 19 годин тому +1

      LOL yes!!! They were something

    • @tomaszp2027
      @tomaszp2027 12 годин тому

      Oh, do that please

  • @kemi1486
    @kemi1486 3 дні тому +32

    I’m so glad Ramit suggested they sign a prenup. Nate seems deeper in love with Serena than she is with him. I hope he does the prenup just to be safe.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +13

      This would be extremely wise. I’m not sensing love vibes from her at all other than love for his money and what she can do with it. Needing counseling before even being married or having kids is such a huge red flag. She seems very cold and self-centered of what benefits her.

    • @raleighkapp-mcdonald1300
      @raleighkapp-mcdonald1300 3 дні тому +6

      @@FunStuffBuddy I see what you mean but I don’t think it is necessarily a red flag to get pre-marital counseling. Especially when a couple has been together for a long time like they have, counseling isn’t a bad thing, it can be an investment in the relationship.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +6

      @@raleighkapp-mcdonald1300 counseling alone isn’t “bad” of course but I can tell you it’s not a good sign this early in the relationship. Coupled with about another 500 statements and red flags from her I would run and try again with someone else. This could be decades of real challenges.

    • @discoveringhealthandfinanc8328
      @discoveringhealthandfinanc8328 2 дні тому +2

      ​@@FunStuffBuddythat's a weird take. You're acting like therapy should be used after things have turned bad. I think most couples should go to therapy earlier in their relationship even if its just to help communicate better. Seeking therapy is always a green flag since its seeking help

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +1

      @@discoveringhealthandfinanc8328 did you see my follow up -> counseling alone isn’t “bad” of course but I can tell you it’s not a good sign this early in the relationship to need this much help. The couple should flow more naturally and easily than this. Coupled with about another 500 statements and red flags from her I would run and try again with someone else. This could be decades of real challenges.

  • @YouraverageGus
    @YouraverageGus 3 дні тому +16

    Damn I’m so impressed on her growth like mad respect 🙏🏻

  • @leessssa
    @leessssa День тому +2

    This was a really good follow up episode! Loved it!
    Please do more of these Ramit and team!

  • @he.smile_
    @he.smile_ 3 дні тому +11

    This is what I love about the “reunion” episode of Reality TV shows; see how people react to themselves. I love seeing that on this show too!

  • @RaylinRecords
    @RaylinRecords 2 дні тому +3

    ok I am really rooting for this couple. Great growth and lessons learned. Looking forward to seeing these healthy newlyweds thrive.

  • @mariaeugeniaespinozam.3691
    @mariaeugeniaespinozam.3691 День тому +3

    I find it hard to believe that non of her friends and family saw the episode! 🤷🏻‍♀️ The only explanation possible is she was to embarrassed to let them know!

  • @swithheld9905
    @swithheld9905 День тому +1

    Love to see growth and critical reviews of yourself! good job, serena

  • @megaawesomedaisy
    @megaawesomedaisy День тому

    This whole episode is so great !!! Loved how Nate said that the skills of talking about money, not only translate to money but all of life 😊 Amazing ❤

  • @janetkenny4861
    @janetkenny4861 2 дні тому +8

    Would love to see them again when they have been married and he is launched in his job.

  • @charmin78
    @charmin78 2 дні тому +1

    My wedding top 3: vows, pictures, dancing
    We hung our framed vows in the wall. Every anniversary we recite them (to remind ourself of the vision we are committed to)

  • @alphabetsoup848
    @alphabetsoup848 2 дні тому +3

    I really related to nate when i first saw yalls story its really nice to see the growth , very inspiring

  • @mycrohnsjourney
    @mycrohnsjourney 17 годин тому

    You guys are awesome! Serena I can totally relate to you! Congrats on your wedding 🎉

  • @JenMockensturm-i1v
    @JenMockensturm-i1v 3 дні тому +14

    Strategically she should never let him have to pay interest on credit cards at a higher rate than the interest on her student loans. If she has enough to pay extra on them, she should dial that back to pay for these trips. In addition, I would be looking at the interest rates on both of their student loans and they should be paying off whichever has the higher rate first. If his loans have a higher rate, she should be covering much more of the rent so he can chip away at his loans rather than hers. If they start thinking of all their money as theirs, they will be able to make such better financial decisions.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +3

      It’s mostly about what best suites her in the moment. Ya know, like a self-centered only child.

  • @angelarodriguez9150
    @angelarodriguez9150 2 дні тому +3

    I definitely hope for a part 3 after the wedding and the schooling has been completed!!!! 🎉

  • @CuriousApollo
    @CuriousApollo 3 дні тому +8

    Thank them for coming back. I wish I would have seen more progress. I think her mindset changed a bit but her actions did not. I think the advice I would give them and some of the best you have is be a zero debt family (when it comes to cards). I think she will wish she would have been more actually generous during this time for him. I know I was with a past partner and we aren’t even together anymore but I feel good about how much I was able to help.

    • @swithheld9905
      @swithheld9905 День тому +1

      we do have to be careful though, and she is being smart by putting boundaries on her generosity. there are TONS of stories of women supporting men through the low income, tough early years of med or law school, only for them to end up cheating or leaving once they make more money and become successful. secure your bag and take care of yourself FIRST, esp before being married and without that prenup.

  • @thewriteplaceforme6874
    @thewriteplaceforme6874 День тому +1

    Really appreciate a follow-up after 1-2 years!! You can really see plans put into action and growth.
    I most appreciated Ramit pressing hard on being a team and dream together. I think Serena has a ways to go on that. Nate is just trying to get to the other side of his education and training. The image that came to mind was a three-legged race - two people have to coordinate to overcome being tied together in order to win. If your partner is struggling, you either help them or cut them loose in order to win.
    Looking a few more years down the road if Serena wants to take time off to raise kids or perhaps she has a setback in her career, I can't see Nate telling her, "well, you're still using 50% of the living space, so make sure you have your half of the rent." I think Serena would be shocked and hurt, while at the same time not recognizing her reflected behavior. It's not a gender thing; it's a team thing. They're on the road together, but are they on the same team?
    Serena's parents seem to be the model for her that she doesn't want to follow, but still repeats their patterns. I wonder how they dealt with the expenses of raising kids.
    Serena and Nate have a really solid foundation, and I think therapy is going to help them navigate the obstacles ahead.
    I wish them well!

  • @thisgirl7024
    @thisgirl7024 3 дні тому +4

    Watching the video and still not done but even half way through, this is a perfect couple to end the year with. It’s incredible seeing how much they both took away from your initial conversation & their dedication to actually making those changes to be in the better place they are now. Happy for them both and wishing them the best! Also want to say thank you Ramit, I’ve learned so much from you this year, between your videos & your book I’ve finally been making the changes I needed to in my own life and relationship with money. Thank you & happy new year 🎉

  • @jera1297
    @jera1297 3 дні тому +2

    I purchased the book today! Big fan and was excited to see this couple return!

  • @CambieSweets
    @CambieSweets 3 дні тому +21

    I could be wrong but Serena's change of heart now that Nate's salary increase is on the horizon seems...Idk, it doesn't seem genuine.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +9

      Agreed. Doesn’t seem genuine at all. She doesn’t appear capable of putting Nate above herself. She’s extremely focused on herself and what works to HER advantage. So hard to watch this.

    • @F.O-j4p
      @F.O-j4p День тому

      My exact thoughts since the 1st interview. Nate's family are paying for a big part of the wedding and the pay rise is on the horizon. Will the bills remain 50:50 after that?

  • @julianvanhoof2372
    @julianvanhoof2372 3 дні тому +23

    Serena has turned around emotionally so fantasticly, and their relationship benefits. However, if you go through the CSP, Nate is basically still paying 50% of the common expenses because that is all he can afford. Hope Serena is prepared to stay 50/50 until all student debt is paid off.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +17

      By her logic, she should pay 50/50 FOREVER (but not really since she needs to be taken care of as she says). Somehow the narrative always changes to suite HER.

    • @MauriSky2437
      @MauriSky2437 3 дні тому +12

      ​@@FunStuffBuddy I am 💯 with you. Not fooled by her "instant" money mindshift completely at all. I smell opportunistic and a sudden blast of reality. A prenup is a MUST.
      Like a recovering drug addict, Serena should be regarded as a person recovering from a selfish mindset...relapse isn't inevitable!

    • @julianvanhoof2372
      @julianvanhoof2372 3 дні тому +3

      On second thought, when they combine their accounts/finances when married, starting with equal income, they should never look at the individual contributions again.

    • @MauriSky2437
      @MauriSky2437 3 дні тому

      @@julianvanhoof2372 advantages go to Serena, regardless of the angle one looks at the situation. I have enough friends that have been financially burned by spouses, male and/or female.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +8

      @@MauriSky2437 EXACTLY! This is just so fake. You can see just pure euphoria of the money oozing out of her and by her statements to try to cover it up (but actually expose it more if you pay attention)

  • @katemurray6223
    @katemurray6223 2 дні тому +7

    SERENA pay €100-€200 more in rent. It will mean a huge amount to Nate. You will get it back 10x in the future

  • @hadaar_
    @hadaar_ День тому +1

    Two hours is probably too long for a youtube video, but I am pleased to see these two again. I quite liked them the first time around.

  • @cathblaze694
    @cathblaze694 3 дні тому +2

    Great couple, so happy for them! Wishing you all the best. Happy New Year Ramit

  • @charmin78
    @charmin78 2 дні тому +2

    These dedicated follow ups are so important to see longer term impact.

  • @Wofnfkfnddoddbb
    @Wofnfkfnddoddbb 3 дні тому +5

    I remember not finishing the original episode because it was so difficult to watch! Anyone else?

  • @mykhalable9433
    @mykhalable9433 3 дні тому +16

    I grew up homeless as a child. I inherited nothing from either parent. I joined the military for eight years after dropping out of college to provide for dying mother. I started late to saving, but I've had no help from family or friends but I've always made it a priority to save and invest money, no matter how small. I finished school late at the age of 32, but I now work in a good job. I put the max contribution to my 401k and ROTH IRA every year. When people say they can't afford $100 each month I'm left dumbfounded. Not that they spend it all on Starbucks, but they have no issue renting out of their range, or buying a $50k+ truck. Anyone can invest, but there will be some sacrifices.

  • @monicabender3943
    @monicabender3943 3 дні тому +10

    This couple is heroic. My husband and I have been together for 20 years and still struggle to talk about money.

    • @kemi1486
      @kemi1486 3 дні тому

      They are maturing greatly and being very resilient for sure. My husband and I have been together for 18yrs and the money talks continue to be a work in progress. What I’ve found works is revisiting the shared vision for our lives together. That usually brings us back on track.

  • @Squintillions
    @Squintillions 2 дні тому

    Glad to see the follow-up and that the couple took your advice into consideration and applied it.

  • @kemigreene9816
    @kemigreene9816 3 дні тому +14

    So impressed how much she has learnt and grown! U go girl!

  • @alanaherbert6037
    @alanaherbert6037 День тому

    Love to see the growth and adaptability of Serena. Great advice Remit for advocating for yourself in a relationship

  • @Amtrakker
    @Amtrakker 2 дні тому +3

    I saw you Ramit on GMA this morning! Awesome bro!!

  • @Shampy-x8w
    @Shampy-x8w 3 дні тому +3

    Big cuzzo buying your book on Amazon and seeing you next week. Happy new year ramit !

  • @MaryColeman-i5y
    @MaryColeman-i5y 2 дні тому +19

    I dont see lot of progress. Why is nate taking all the hits? Still not paying a prorated amount of rent. Why? That bill he ran up for work travel should have been something they figured without the host's help. I watched the facials. Nate has to start advocating for himself. They may want to slow this train down.

  • @JaniVMD
    @JaniVMD День тому

    I love these two! I have so much respect and admiration for their love and relationship. They are setting themselves up for so much success. I am two years from graduating residency and I am still working on not being so hard on myself and allowing a balance of enjoying life and also prioritizing saving, investing, and our future. We are all a work in progress

  • @IsabelleBOUCHARD-n4s
    @IsabelleBOUCHARD-n4s 3 дні тому +6

    Would love to see them again in two years!

  • @happyfulfillinglife
    @happyfulfillinglife 2 дні тому +1

    My book came today!! So excited to dive in 🎉🎉🎉

  • @MauriSky2437
    @MauriSky2437 3 дні тому +28

    The love from Serena seems strategic at best and financially conditional. Prenup.

    • @funkyt2436
      @funkyt2436 3 дні тому +9

      Seriously, the fact she had to be dragged kicking and screaming into an equitable relationship is terrifying... As soon as he starts making more than her, all bets are off..

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +6

      Good summary

    • @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma
      @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma 2 дні тому +2

      I have beeeen looking for this comment. I am barely 15 mins into the video.

    • @uranuswink8843
      @uranuswink8843 День тому +1

      The prenup will protect her from his debt, I'd imagine, but it won't protect any income he earns while they're married. A prenup would almost exclusively benefit Serena as the previous high earner. He has no premarital assets to protect.

    • @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma
      @GraceRumbiManyeruke-Choruma День тому

      @uranuswink8843 A prenuptial also details how assets and liabilities acquired during the marriage are dealt with, i.e. should they divorce, assets (from the upcoming Dr income) and liabilities(post and pre marriage date) that they each acquire during the marriage can be said to be belonging to them in the individual capacities. Essentially, pre-nup can detail how they want to deal with money while in and after (should they part) their marriage.

  • @cobra2966
    @cobra2966 3 дні тому +49

    For Nate’s sake, I hope Serena’s change is genuine and not a result of her realizing that he’ll be making 600k+ soon. Maybe I’m just a skeptic, but for some reason, her sudden change of heart during his final year of residency doesn’t sit well with me

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +9

      💯. She seems to have this fake euphoria around her during the call more around the money than being with him.

    • @pinaymom1984
      @pinaymom1984 3 дні тому +9

      Agree! No one would have a change of heart overnight unless she have a motive. She’s been doing it for yrs, why now? Bec their roles will now be reversed. He’s finally gonna earn $$$ after residency so she better act like she care! Doesn’t look genuine to me. 😆
      PS married to a doctor.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +4

      @@pinaymom1984 exactly!!! It’s sad Nate either doesn’t see it, enjoys the “power” he will have over her due to this salary, or feels like she put up with him during med school and/or feels like he won’t find anyone else. I’m around my doctor’s personal lives and I just see this constantly. They’ll stay married for decades and be miserable. Needing couple therapy before even getting married and/or kids is always a red flag.

    • @MissGirl1450
      @MissGirl1450 3 дні тому +2

      ⁠@@pinaymom1984overnight? Dude, it's been two years since their episode. They're actively in singles and couples counseling. They've been together for nine years! You sound bitter and like you're projecting.

    • @kemi1486
      @kemi1486 3 дні тому +9

      I hope not but if you’re correct maybe that’s why she’s the one doing all the talking. She’s over explaining her points a lot.

  • @EmilyAllan
    @EmilyAllan 3 дні тому +29

    For all those commenting that she should pay for more while he's in school, please keep in mind they are not married. If she sinks all her assets and time into a guy that hasn't married her, there is a danger the relationship could end and she would be saddled with all of the financial cost of his schooling that wasn't his tuition, and no way to recoup it. I think she's being smart.

    • @MsSaintJo
      @MsSaintJo 3 дні тому +8

      I’m totally with you. I don’t understand why she has to help him out living in patriarchal society. They are not even married. He earned his degree for himself first and it will stay with him forever. I doubt that he will recall her sacrifice years ahead.
      I like better “her money is her money, his money is their money”

    • @holamissmusica
      @holamissmusica 3 дні тому +2

      Hear hear

    • @Star-lighting-A
      @Star-lighting-A 2 дні тому +5

      Good point. Getting the paperwork done at least would make me feel better. There was another pair where the guy decided to not get married after she has held him down for so many years while he went to school. C’est la vie.

    • @kristinaerickson2353
      @kristinaerickson2353 2 дні тому +6

      That's what I'm saying. I was floored that people were thinking she should be paying more because he makes less when they aren't married. Like she's SOL if decides as soon as he has a good job to split. I've seen it happen many many times. My husband's ex did that to him.

    • @shwazine5358
      @shwazine5358 2 дні тому +1

      JFC did you even watch the original video?

  • @withtheshitzpodcast416
    @withtheshitzpodcast416 3 дні тому +33

    She bothers me because what will be her mindset when he’s making 600k a year in a few years??? Is she gonna still be paying half the bills? Of course not. She should be paying for at least 70% of all bills until he gets his initial increase . Simple

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +6

      Exactly. She’s happy that sticking with him for 9 years is finally about to pay off…the money has brought this euphoria and dreams of buying stuff more than being with him sadly.

    • @slabbygabby
      @slabbygabby 3 дні тому +2

      Ew

    • @miyun5973
      @miyun5973 2 дні тому +3

      ...but they weren't married and she has a complicated relationship with money in relationships. If she HAD paid 70% and then after his residency, they broke up, would you have a bit more empathy for their situation? Sorry, but your comment smells a little of misogyny and lacks empathy.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 2 дні тому +6

      @ ​​⁠did you watch both videos in full? I did. It goes far beyond one individual thing that was said or done. The overall feeling you get when watching her, her justifications, and her actions is not real comforting. She’s the one lacking strong empathy.

  • @swithheld9905
    @swithheld9905 День тому +1

    I was hoping to see them take a hug break at the end!! haha ❤😂

  • @sarahmunoz14
    @sarahmunoz14 2 дні тому

    Great follow-up. Lovely couple who grew because you helped them and they did the work.

  • @uranuswink8843
    @uranuswink8843 День тому +2

    The mental gymnastics this guy does to justify why he's still paying more in rent are hilarious. Impressive rationalization.

  • @lee-13
    @lee-13 3 дні тому +7

    For his sake I hope he looks into a prenup! I wish them the best in their union! ❤😊

  • @madso._.o
    @madso._.o 3 дні тому +2

    Already pre-ordered the book!

  • @ohchristineho
    @ohchristineho День тому +3

    The amount of mental gymnastics Nate has to do to tiptoe around Serena's feelings is astonishing. It seems like he's the one who did all the work, she just realized she sounded awful and can admit to that, but it doesn't feel like her actual actions or feelings have adjusted at all. The ratio hasn't changed, he's still managing her feelings of anxiety about money (very carefully worded by him but I'm reading between the lines), and her main concern is how her own finances have improved. It felt like she just came on here to seek Ramit's approval and a pat on the head for admitting she sounded like an absolute stingy narcissist. For the love of all things holy, Nate, get your ducks in a row and sign that prenup!

    • @alillilwoopoh5769
      @alillilwoopoh5769 15 годин тому +1

      Thank you for saying this. These are my thoughts exactly. I felt like I was going insane reading these congratulatory comments. Like, yes, there's a bit of shallow self-relective lip service (and blaming it on unnamed "trauma"), but no actual growth or change in behavior.

  • @cooledcannon
    @cooledcannon 2 дні тому +3

    I'm so glad Serena seems much less neurotic now. If she keeps it up she can actually be generous.

  • @rayofsunshan
    @rayofsunshan 2 дні тому +7

    I’m so happy to see Serena prove that “run” isn’t always the answer. She definitely displayed a willingness to grow with Nate rather than just staying stuck in her ways and that’s beautiful to see. Send us wedding photos in May 😂😂 So happy for both of them!

  • @MeishaMom
    @MeishaMom 3 дні тому +14

    unless your married - you need to keep your money separate - there is no contract between roommates each can leave the other.

  • @Builtforsuccess8119
    @Builtforsuccess8119 2 дні тому +1

    Just purchased your book on Audible!! 😁

  • @exxology1
    @exxology1 3 дні тому +10

    I wonder what the prenup will look like!!

  • @kathrynbismonte5789
    @kathrynbismonte5789 2 дні тому

    I really wanna see their first session with ramit to see the improvements!

  • @bythemoonlight20
    @bythemoonlight20 3 дні тому +11

    Is there a plan for future updates from couples? Would love monthly update specials.

    • @ramitsethi
      @ramitsethi  3 дні тому +34

      Should we?

    • @SamMKKK
      @SamMKKK 3 дні тому +7

      @@ramitsethiYes!

    • @alphabetsoup848
      @alphabetsoup848 2 дні тому +4

      That would be awesome even like every 2 or 3 years would be cool seeing the other end
      There are enough episodes to do a monthly update asking each couple every 3 years or so

    • @rory644
      @rory644 2 дні тому

      Follow ups are ok but I think on purely entertainment purposes one a year would be enough. Just my opinion wish them all the best 😀

    • @stephaniemejia4324
      @stephaniemejia4324 2 дні тому

      Please please Sara and Ken episodes 80-81!

  • @EmilyPNW
    @EmilyPNW 3 дні тому +1

    Couple goals. Love this so much!! Thank you for going so in depth too.

  • @saneliswamagagula9781
    @saneliswamagagula9781 18 годин тому

    Wow. Serena’s growth is incredible. I still think the rent split/ total fixed cost split still needs work, but the progress is beautiful to see. Like Nate said, it takes a lot to change your own mind. These two are going to be alright😊

  • @enrique-zarate4594
    @enrique-zarate4594 2 дні тому

    So cool seeing them again

  • @Jeez001
    @Jeez001 3 дні тому +7

    Happy new year everyone!

  • @yarn-rdgz
    @yarn-rdgz 3 дні тому +10

    I still believe there is a lot of room for improvement for Serena. I believe she doesn’t see them selfs as a team, particularly when she says “I bought him coffee” or “I took him to dinner”. Teams will convert that to “We had coffee” and “We had dinner”, even though she “paid for it”. In the end, you might contribute a larger amount to the teams fund(this could be imaginary, you don’t need a joined account to apply the same principle), but when it comes to spending, you both spend on things you do together, no one pays for anything.

    • @FunStuffBuddy
      @FunStuffBuddy 3 дні тому +5

      Oh yea, for sure. She already has planned out what is going to be done with HIS money. It’s always focused on Serena and what is best for Serena.

  • @Isa-x4l4m
    @Isa-x4l4m День тому

    Although Serena definitely had unreasonable expectations in the first episode, I understand where some of her fear was coming from. Even excluding past trauma or ingrained beliefs, they weren't married, she had significant student debt, and her salary was good but not great. In that situation, helping a soon-to-be doctor with bills can feel unfair. I think there are a few different ways to handle this type of situation, but most importantly both of them are clearly a lot happier and have come a long way. Congrats to both of you! - life is about to get much easier.

  • @darrindavis2198
    @darrindavis2198 3 дні тому +1

    I see why you reposted the OG videos last week. Great video about transformation going into the New Year!!! Everyone have a safe and RICH 2025🎉🥳🎉

  • @xavierblackburn4650
    @xavierblackburn4650 3 дні тому +5

    Serena sounds like my ex girlfriend I wish and prayed that she would grow and self reflect. Today is the last day of the year I should have Ramits book at my house when I get off, will be drinking some wine doing my vision board and diving into it.

  • @RB-gq2zy
    @RB-gq2zy 22 години тому +1

    I thought there would be more of a change. I think she is trying to be generous but is having a challenging time doing so. I mean $0 for gifts and giving is pretty telling.

    • @s24ham
      @s24ham 17 годин тому

      Saving for wedding, that’s why 0 for gifts. They already said they are over their initial wedding budget.

    • @tomaszp2027
      @tomaszp2027 12 годин тому

      @@s24ham while overpaying her own student loans by $900? Something is still not right here...

  • @audisiojunior21
    @audisiojunior21 2 дні тому +1

    My brother is a doctor and people have no idea how stressfull is the residence period. He worked so much and barely had enough to pay his house rent. I'm from Brazil, so things here are even harder. He finished his residence in 2022 and his life has improved so much. The worst part is not even the money, but the physological part of enduring that amount of work and bad salary. Keep up nate, it's almost over. The last year is the easiest one.
    Ps.: Professor G talks about transactional relationship with people and his father in particular. It's a pretty insightful way to see life. I recomend hearing his New Years Podcast of 2024-2025.

  • @hoznori7942
    @hoznori7942 3 дні тому +2

    Serena, you are so amazing 😮. Bless you guys. I honestly wish you the best wedding and life together