Highly recommend listening to the musical. It's fun music, it makes fun of itself, and has a good overall message (I mean, that's from the original movie but whatever). I just love the musical okay? The number of times I break out into the dumb love interest song is too often to count. It also ups the traditional masculinity of Lola and Don's fight thing, where instead of arm wrestling, they box.
I cannot possibly express how much I enjoy everything about your channel and personality. You're undeniably one of my favourite creators, and I truly appreciate the work that you put into each video.
He's one of mine, too. He's so thoughtful and doesn't fall into the 'trap' of making bad faith arguments (a lot of other reviewers are *all* about the bad faith arguments). And it's always elevating to see white guy reviewers who're so level headed about feminism and non-binary genders.
Apparently he got the role in "Redbelt" because David Mamet saw "Dirty Pretty Things" and "Kinky Boots" and said "There's no way the same actor can play both of those roles."
The other day I searched for the MakeupAddiction subreddit (a sub for makeup recs, tutorials and looks) and one of the top results was a post in the MGTOW sub talking about how MUA is a "gold mine for Cluster B and damaged women", telling men to "be careful" and that "thots" were posting to the sub for validation. Why men going their own way were on a sub for makeup if they don't like makeup was definitely confusing to me.
On a similar note, I have absolutely no idea how men justify their hatred of women who take pride in their appearance or embrace their sexuality. Like, all the justifications I see are "Oh, she's a slut" "she's a whore" or "she's immoral." Why are some men so angry at women who profit from showing off their body? Like? It's other men that are giving her the money in the first place and they're almost always completely ignored from their hate.
@Harmony Alexandria Yeah, exactly. No one minds men choosing to not engage in relationships, it's a personal choice after all. But when they claim to be going their own way, only to attack and discuss women and their evilness on a daily basis, that's when they should really change their group to "MHW", men hating women.
@@prikas4313 Yeah, most people who support themselves off sexwork are catering to men. The MGTOW who criticize and slut shame want us to think those men are being 'duped' or 'cuck'ed' into forking over their money. Maybe some guys are delusional about what sexwork is about, but if an adult who has money wants to spend it, you can argue that anyone he gives it over to for goods or services is "selling out" or deceptive. It's so shitty and toxic all around
"Whenever a men's rights activist cites some statistic about male combats fatalities, higher rates of mental illness, or harsher prison sentences, it's never an attempt to advocate for medical or judicial reform, it's only ever an attempt to shut women up." IVE BEEN SAYING THIS SINCE FOREVER THANK YOU 🙌
That's a drastic strawman, these are genuine issues with our society and dismissing every men's rights activist as just trying to shut women up is very disingenuous
Jay Buzzton I just think the men's activism movement is useless, since real feminists (not those fake "feminazis") also care and speak up about men's issues. Feminists believe in abolishing gender stereotypes, which would, in the end, favour men as well
@@jaybuzzton453 It's not a straw man - because it happens all too often. You *could* say it's a generalisation, but now we're being pedantic. Men's issues are important and worth addressing. The issue I see regarding movements like the MRA and "red-pilling" is the conflation of men's rights advocacy (or fighting for social justice for men) with anti-feminism. One does not have to lead to the other.
@@mothsforeyes Agreed. It's the same game that plays the "straight pride parade", they don't even care about their sexual orientation or the problems they have, they just use it to atack the LGBT+ community.
anonymous on the topic of circumcision the truth is the risk factor for girls is much higher than men and the barbaric nature in which it is carried out and how it effects women’s lives is far more drastic. For girls it can make peeing and sex extremely painful and a botched female circumcision can make childbirth even more excruciating than it already is. Furthermore in Africa (where most female circumcision takes place) child marriages and circumcisions are linked as families circumcise their daughters to marry them off and verify to their husbands that they are virgins. Meanwhile for male circumcision there are far less downsides, as it is rarely botched and actually can sometimes help std prevention. I don’t think either are good, but I think sometimes women’s groups get angry at this comparison because the longstanding facts are that it is far worse for women when they are circumcised.
First of all,I'm with you on Chiwetel Ejiofor being one hell of an actor. He's,in my opinion, so underrated. Second,I'm new to this channel, but you are becoming my favourite. Your vids are fantastic. Keep up the good work!
@@rickyhunt4075 that definitely does not check out, cos british actors are everywhere in american films. hollywood just does not have many leading roles for non-white actors cos they are cowards ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
music in the intro is “Testosterone” by Bush. (not sure if it was sourced anywhere in the video but i figured some people might want to know like i did)
Masculinity, like femininity, is largely irrelevant. A strong woman is no less of a woman for being strong, and a gentle man is no less a man for being gentile. These are antiquated terms that serve no modern function.
In my opinion they only serve a use when talking about gender presentation as a descriptive, not to do with gender, sex, sexuality or romantic attraction.
It is important in administrative sense because men where (and are) used by every state as cannon fodder. If you think that gender truly is irrelevant please propose that women should be included in a draft during emergency war time. I will wait here...holding my breath and waiting to see the reaction of people.
@@jakubmike5657 There is no need for a draft emergency. We've been living in war time our entire lives. You are arguing a point that was not only never made, but is irrelevant to reality.
@@racewiththefalcons1 You think you lived in wartime? Attacking someone on the other side of the world while having massive technological advantage, possibility to bug out and entire ocean to guard you from retalation is not war. Imagine actual war, with enemy who is close to your strenght in tech and has equal or greater number of people. Imagine loses going in tens of thousands from a single battle. How fast would you burn throught your reserves, how fast would you burn throught volunteers? USA issued draft for Vietnam war and it was largly by proxy. Draft is a sad neccesity in a situation of conventional war between oponnents of similar strenght. Is it irrelevant to reality? I hope you are right, I really do. But at the same time I know that if shit hits the fan all talks about gender being a social construct will go out of the window and Johnny Jack and James will receive draft letters while Jane Joan and Janette will not.
I have complex ptsd because I was an intellectual kid with little physical skill to him in the '90s. I've been harassed, punched, kicked, attacked with clubs and everything in-between because I was not "masculine enough". I had to learn to fight to survive and became damn good at it... it was my downfall. Now I'm 35, barely started to put my life back on tracks this year. I know for a fact that what they did collectively to me was wrong, I'm a dysfunctional adult, it took me years to get rid of my violent defensive impulses, I still have troubles with socialization as it leaves me anxious and obsessed with self-perfection to avoid discord, my emotions are in shamble. And it gave me nothing in exchange. Bullying and hypermasculinity are actually an ablation of the ego with the goal of making you ready to sacrifice yourself in case of an emergency. It's basically a per-historical preschool for child soldiers. It serves nothing in the modern world, it's a cultural artifact of a world that came and past, but we lost the meaning of it all. In a world where 90% of men were likely to die before reproduction, it made some kind of utilitarian sense to protect survival, but in the modern world, where cooperation is key to a stable development due to increased international inter reliance and peace, those aggressive behaviors are counterproductive if not downright dangerous. This world of hyper-competition and aggression makes no sense anymore, but we didn't evolve yet for our time period. Genetically it takes tens of thousands of years to see changes based on mortality pre reproduction, we won't see that, we have to adapt while our primitive brains are left in the neolithic. We have to learn to recognize these dysfunctional instincts and learn to put them under check otherwise we will suffer from it and transfer them through painful experiences to the next generations who will, in turn, face the same issues we do about gender identity, violence, small egos easily bruised and hopeless social prospects. By the way, I really like the final morale, accepting change was what saved me from self-inflicted death in the long run, I was one of the lucky ones, I was saved more than once from those destructive learnings by family, friends and myself... but it wasn't an easy treck to get where I'm finally starting (a bit) to feel happy most days, still a long way to go (at least until I die, there is always more land to cover in self-discovery). Real courage is facing demons, most of them live in your own skull.
arnean lmao of course it has this whole notion cane from a man a analyzing the power stricter of wolf pacs who ignored the fact that the wolves he analyzed were in captivity only. He came up with the terms alpha and beta to describe the hierarchy among them but later denounced all his claims of the “alpha beta structure” since it’s not even accurate with wolves since they have structures of family and not power dynamics in nature. And this by its founder denounced inaccuracy of “natural power dynamics” is where anti-feminists got both a lot of their lingo and also a certain view on men they deem weaker and try to belittle by calling them “beta”
@@bluejay2097 not to mention, this study was done using wolves that were unrelated, and therefore aggression ensued. Wild wolf packs are a family structure, the "alphas" are the parents, and the rest of the wolves are their offspring.
this happens in alot of animals, and still in humans. It doesn't mean that it is the end all, be all and should be used to make all of our decisions, but it exists. Imagine in your head a beta male, then an alpha male (not a douchebag), and ask yourself which one you would want to lead you in an emergency situation. The Rock is an alpha male, people turn their heads when he walks into the room, he works hard, charming, physically imposing. Men want to be him and women want to be with him for these reasons. Sheldon from Big Bang Theory is a beta, physically weak and inept, and commands no respect from anyone. Walk into a young boys room and look at what posters he has on the wall, the athletes, action stars and comic characters are the alpha males that he wants to be when he grows up. What kid wants to be skinny Steve Rogers instead of Captain America? It being unfair doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
@@NoirTech83 the study that started the whole alpha-beta-omega was disproven because it didn't observe behaviour of 1 pack of wolfs, but a group of wolfs all from different packs (also out of their own territory). This meant that they were much more agessive and feeling unsafe in an unknown place filled with strangers. When the study was repeated in an actual pack, it showed that the leaders of the group weren't the stongest or more agessive, but those that difused conflict and nurtured. And that's why the whole thing was disproven. Of course stong people exist, and charismatic people, etc., but that doesn't necesarily means they're good leaders. The rock is not only phisically strong, he also takes part in many social projects and humanitarian efforts, and that gives him more points towards being a good leader, than how much he can bench press.
@@mysterious2007damn Oh E;R made a video on Legand of Korra that I thought was fairly funny and interesting, and then later when Pewdipie was recommending channels, I found out that E;R was somewhat alt-righty?? And then I kind of picked up the cues for it, so I decided to unsub from them. I just felt that I should be more responsible for the channels I decide to support, if that makes sense. I had to unsub so many channels because I just cannot unsee it?
@@ambergong7201 I really used to like E;R but his alt right tendencies are becoming undeniable like that weird rant about gender in the steven universe videos when the gems are aliens therefore human biology doesn't apply to them like it literally has nothing to do with it. His watchman video was the last straw for me though he watched one episode and then made a bunch of awful race realism jokes that didn't seem like jokes to me. It's like he went from attacking LGBTQ content to black content.
WOWOWOWOW... Einstein used to say “Any fool can know. The point is to understand.”, you understand ... thanks for making me think ... please accept a hug from lisbon, portugal, EU
@@kevin080592 When I need to channel my masculinity, I use Sabaton's "Panzer Batallion". I may or may not have grown chest hair and tripled my muscle mass while listening to that song.
i don't understand people's obsession with gender. i didn't grow up in a world where all men acted the same and thought the same or all women acted the same and thought the same. i couldn't guess who someone is from their biological sex; i'd have to get to know them. did other people grow up in some other world?
A lot of people gain their self worth and confidence from what they believe are the most desired traits and images of their gender. To criticize, critique, or just slightly engage with our strict gender norms is for many people an attack on who they believe they are. Gender, sex, and identity become inseparable... its so damn childish
Yea I dont get it either, my gender/genitals has never been my identity, in a gender fluid way or a "MGTOW" way. I just happen to be female and have female genitals and express myself in ways that make me happy. Most people dont see me the way I see myself, that's always going to be the struggle of expression and identity and relationships. You can express all the traits you find to be peak masculinity but that doesnt mean people will see those traits as peak masculinity or view you as masculine or desirable or acceptable because of those traits. Because people are more than that cheap flat cutout. Its funny, he talks about the toxic aspect of it being about controlling other people, but you see it on both extremes, trans/gender fluid and anti feminists wanting to control how other people perceive them, and control how they are addressed without realizing the hypocrisy of that mentality.
Well, I happen to be female too, and if there is something I have learned in years of experience that that it is necessary to talk about gender not because I have an issue with it, but because people who do impact my life in a negative manner. Either by legislating in an attempt to control my body (and I am not just talking about abortion rights there), or by not bothering to test how the female body reacts to drugs as opposed to the male body, or by not taking me seriously in situations in which they absolutely should just because I am not male. And I am very aware that what I have to deal with is nothing compared to what trans/gender flued people have to face. So I don't think that you can put what trans/gender fluid people talking about on one level of what anti-feminist people are talking about. AT ALL!!!! One group is talking about the topic in order to defend their right be what they are. The other group is talking about the topic in order to deny other people their rights. That is an important difference.
@@swanpride oh I dont think people should be oppressed for expressing themselves. Ita more like...when gender identity is so important to two different parties, what makes one different, acceptable and one not? I dont care how people express their identity as long as it's not hurting anyone. But I do care when they expect me to participate and support their beliefs in what gender is and how they experience it. But they cant convey and explain to me why their experience of it is more valid than other peoples, and why that means the system needs to change (to either reinforce toxic masculinity, or to be reconfigured to accommodate identity into the laws that govern everyone rather than facts, not just laws not to discriminate against people or abuse them in conversion camps) And I mean it is important to re-explore on an individual and social level why all bathrooms should not just be universal anyways, or why sports are separated info male and female athletes. How hospitals identity physical factors in patients versus how they socially treat patients. But we have to fully explore the pros and cons of each and they why's before we barrel ahead and change it to accommodate it for a minority. We wouldnt do that just because some men just *feel* like malware are superior to females, so why would we do that because some people just feel like their identity genital combo is off? With sexuality, its just so straight forward. Anyone is physically capable of sexually pleasuring anyone else. With consent, that hurts no one and steps on no ones rights. With gender queer, there is no consenting, it's just "this is how we perceive ourselves, and your perception is invalid". And that concept is not acceptable anywhere else in society. You can express yourself any way you want, but that doesnt mean other people consent to participate or believe you are what you present yourself as. (Furry, catgirl, or recognize your homemade halloween costume of a character that's had multiple depictions is your own depiction of the character, art is subjective because perception is subjective).
Naturally your perception in invalid. How would you feel if someone tells you "well, I perceive you as a man". You would insist that your perception is one which counts. And rightly so. Frankly, this is just about not being a dick to people.
I so agree with you wholeheartedly. I am very young and lack a lot of experience. But so often I look at the men in my life who want so much to control me out of righteousness. And I realise I a seventeen year old girl am more of a man than all of them. Cause I know there is nothing strong about stubbornness. I relish being wrong and realising it. And they are but children throwing tantrums at the truth until it goes away.
I am very young and lack a lot of experience. I relish being wrong and realising i And they are but children throwing tantrums at the truth until it goes away. Error...does not compute. Look at this: I realise that being young and lacking experience makes it almost impossible for me to be certain of what is going on, and people of greater experience try to tell me something but they are just wrong and I know that despite previously admitting of lacking experience to make educated guesses. Because I am internally consistent!
@@jakubmike5657 Why would you tell someone that they're inconsistent in such a cold and curt manners, if the more effective way would be to ask? - Hey Noemie, if you know you don't know everything that can be known about certain things, how sure can you be if that other people are just throwing tantrums? Do they really not have a point? May it be, that you are writing all this only to affirm yourself in what you believe, without allowing other people to change your mind? - A question you need to ask yourself Jakub: were you pointing out the internal inconsistency in her comment, because you wanted to teach Noemie logic? Or was your goal only to expose the inconsistency of this single expression by one person, without acknowledging, that in the big picture some men _do_ try to cancel out what women are trying to say pretty often? I find that your comment lacks explanation and doesn't attempt to be very helpful. Perhaps you're not very good at communicating and you really were trying to help and I'm sorry if everything I assume about you is wrong. Your slight unhelpfulness makes you seem like someone who just tells someone else how they should do things -without enabling that person to make their own choices. Maybe being less ironic in the wrong place would help too?
@@deninpaul7509 I think you do know and you're either asking this question to get an angry reply to "own the libs" or you just don't see it. Despite having a doctor as a wife, Ben Shabibo is constantly undermining the actual experiences of women in the professional field and women retaking their sexuality out of the narrative control of men. So, yeah. Not only that he maintains being friends with alt-right shitheads who only use him as "their Jewish friend" and who would just as quickly drop him if he showed any signs of not towing the line.
@@ghumashenaa4414 No. Basic parenting doesn't get cookies. Trans kids are lot less than and you don't need praise for loving them. It's a minimal requirement.
Man...I’m so glad I learned about your channel this summer. Each and every one of your videos is an absolute joy to watch, and you somehow get better with each one you post. You’re so well-informed, and have such a pleasant, noncondescending demeanor when you’re presenting the information you’ve clearly put in a lot of work to research. Just...really great stuff, keep doing what you’re doing!!
Am I the only one who's elated that a dude can be THIS conventionally attractive and be THIS much of a feminist? Oh no. Is this what they call the "big gay"? Is this what it's like?
Gender is a cultural construction. Always has been, always will be. And not all cultures use the binary, as many have what are called third genders. This gets to that without actually stating it.
I never get the need for third gender. Because it opens neccesity for fourth (What if you do not feel like part of first three right) and fifth and sixth and eventually we should just give up and say there are as many genders as there are humans since everyone has there own variations of expression. It is just easier to say there is X and not-X. And sure lines get fuzzy when you zoom in hard enough which is why people are confused (kind of like finding definitive line between orange and red on a color wheel) so it is a declaration statement, but creating additional categories just moves the goal post to new line (what if I am right on the line of third one and second one?). When you accept simple notion that muscle bound cigar smoking, killing machine who throws one liners around is a man and a guy who likes sewing and poetry is a man... it just becomes easier.
@@jakubmike5657 one modern version of third legal SEX not gender, is intersex. It is practical because it lets kids who are born very mixed decide for themselves what they want for their (probably delayed) puberty. Third gender in history is for instance the Indian hijra (eunuchs, intersex, and transgender people).
God I love this guy. As a woman who has had predominantly negative interactions with men I am actively trying to understand men, and how society affects them, so I can begin to have a more positive opinion of men in general (or at least not see them as inherently dangerous). This man gives me hope.
As a guy who’s had predominantly negative experiences with women I greatly sympathize with you I can’t speak for all men but I can elaborate on some general or universal experiences and issues men go through in our modern society
More movies to put on my "must watch"-list... I just wrote a long comment about my personal experience with and view of masculinity as a trans man, but it got way too long, so I gave up and deleted all of it. Well, anyway, great video! I'm not sure if you reached the intended audience, but you certainly reached this soyboy here :)
It would actually have been interesting for me to read. Nobody is forced to read through a wall of text, so don't feel shy to post one. Those who don't want to engage with it, can just skip to the next comment.
@@johannageisel5390 Yeah, I didn't really think about other people finding my comment too long. It's just that I had already written so much and had just barely scratched the surface, and since I didn't feel like sitting here for an hour writing a comment, but also didn't want to leave a comment that wasn't finished, I just deleted it. It's really hard to write a youtube comment about a topic like this, because it's all way to complicated and a lot of nuance is lost when trying to be concise.
Always appreciating solid research and well thought out arguments. Great content as per usual! Thanks for communicating progressive (although they shouldn’t be thought of as such) ideas and the concept of changing ones mind/belief/preconceived notions. Loved the video!
This is the kind of conversations we need to have about masculinity and dudes, I don't like just saying man bad bc it's not what is needed, it just creates more animosity.
I have had to pause the video to go find and rent Children of Men. You have no idea how hard it is for me to wait to watch this video, but I shall do it because I’ve been wanting to see the movie for such a long time.
As a trans guy who has struggled with my perceived masculinity and how I don't necessarily fit into rigid boxes of manhood, this video is just what I needed. Not only was it a refreshing take, I have new movies to watch as well as a new favorite channel. I knew you were great before this, don't get me wrong, but yeah. Thank you so much for this video and the time, effort, and hard work you put into making them.
I liked this essay the first time I watched it, but over time I've come to realize that it's one of my all time favorites (up there with Who's Afraid of Modern Art and The Ethics of Satirizing Nazis). I love the idea of looking at different expressions of one gender identity through the lens of film. I love your unbelievably clean conclusion debunking bioessentialism. I love the excitement on your face when you don't want to give away the Chiwetel bit yet. So well-executed, and started a really productive conversation with my mom about sex vs gender.
Femininity and masculinity definetly exist, but neither of them is inherently only for women or only for men. I personally like things that are neither feminine nor masculine (like science, astronomy and critical thinking) but I'm not non-binary or intersex.
I am non-binary and I see it like the yin and yang does. As complements of each other, but both needed to form a person. So I don't understand the fight to separate the two.
For me, masculine and feminine are not bad traits at all. Like the yin and yang, they compliment what we need. Now, whether it is a man who exhibits traditionally feminine traits such as being gentle, caring, and quiet, or the woman being assertive, in control, and violent... well, gender doesnt matter. Are you lit from the inside by fire or moonlight? Both are necessary, and both have their flaws. Femininity can be seen as being passive and weak, and masculinity as brash and unpleasant. Each person holds both of these aspects within, only to varying degrees.
caring...you think being caring is feminine trait? And being assertive a masculine one? traits do not have a gender. Do you know why being agressive was considered masculine trait? Because for majority of history nations had a very weak police forces, and state did not have a monopoly on violence. You wanted to be safe you had to protect yourself (and of course your closest neighours who in turn help to protect you) . Being capable of violence was a good trait in a man because it ment he can protect his own family. If woman was agressive she would be quickly overwhelmed by a man who has massive strenght and endurance advantage in most situations. It is not that women are not agressive, it is that in most situations being physically agressive would end very badly for them. Look at descriptions of ancient wars, women were not even considered enemy combatants...they were loot.
It's sort of a sad fact of how masculinity is viewed that just by virtue of being someone with such open, public, non-toxic masculinity you're now my absolute favorite man. Thank you for this absolutely stellar video essay!
the last part made me feel so much better about myself. it’s so fucking comforting. i think you’re the only man i’d every truly trust. i want to be more like you and wish more were as open as you were!
I wish I'd figured some of these things out earlier in life, but fairly early, in my 20's, I realized what a foolish game it was to be a ______. Don't be a ______. Be you, an individual. That's enough work.
This is one of my favorite videos on UA-cam. As a person with very little time to watch videos -- and practically no time to engage with them -- I watch everything at 2x speed. I want to hear video hosts talk quickly. It sounds weird to me to hear speech in this medium at a regular pace. It sounds like every syllable is drawn out needlessly. But with this video, it has to be regular speed for me, even over multiple viewings. There's so much to hear in this video. So much to absorb. So much value.
Great new video ~ Love it partially because the actor is amazing and half the movies you mentioned, I haven't seen yet and now I'm gonna watch them. But also, I was thinking how ContraPoints mentioned in a video about men how some might in fact need a sense of masculine identity. And how female feminists can't carve out a distinct, nontoxic masculinity for men even if we try. Because she believes this is something only dudes can do for themselves. I think this might be a good way to start--by critically analyzing who you're told to be and how those traits manifest, and what might be harmful or not. Maybe ContraPoints is wrong and boys don't really need a distinct sense of masculinity (just as girls don't *really* need to embrace femininity either). But if masculinity and femininity are in constant change and no trait is inherent to any gender, then whatever identities we carve out in the future, whether or not they're in any way related to sex or gender, being adaptable and open to change will make a difference in ensuring the toxicity is left behind. Also. I love the video's last line. Made me snap my fingers.
@@coldcrashpictures Are you ever going to talk about how people always believe that a feminist characters have to be masculine to be empowering? Never feminine. It's almost as masculinity=strong and femininity=weak.
Loved this video !!! Can I ask you to accept subtitles ? I'm French and would love to share those videos (especially to friends) but some have trouble with English! I'd love to help to translate ;)
Renegade Cut Pop Culture Detective coldcrashpictures The Holy Trinity I love your videos and i appreciate you so much for talking about these topics. Thank you!!!
This video was awesome. I am physically what most people would call archetypical male: tall, lantern jawed, fit, deep voice, I have 'great big bushy beard'. But that is about it, I would definitely call myself feminist, I am vegan (love me some soybeans), detest sports, and not particularly competitive or at least overtly. I like wood-working and working on cars but my mother taught me to sew, and I love sewing. I would have used to say that it isn't very masculine to stand around and worry about how another man thinks of you. It doesn't seem very 'manly' to have your self-worth dependent upon what another person thinks of you. But now, I would say it is about being humanist. No man or woman should base their worth about how some rando thinks about you. And I am comfortable enough to say: yeah, you are a good looking guy.
Your videos are so helpful with my writing in terms of character development, I feel like you really get to the root of what makes a good character a good character while also relating it to real life situations making it so much easier to create a message and tone for anyone trying to make their own stories
Love this video, my favourite on screen version of masculinity is Newt Scamander, I find movies where they stereotype characters according to gender, race or sexual orientation to be boring and derivative. Thank you :-)
I feel like there's been a changing wind recently. I'm seeing more and more discussions about what is good and admirable in entertainment instead of always talking about what is bad and has to be banished. Over the last year, the discussion about fairness and equality in media seemed to have taken the form of insisting that everyone has to be the same, and looking down on people trying to do things that are different.
3:35 I paused it because I haven't seen that movie! Will return to this video after watching. Might take a while because I can't access it here in Finland
When Lola gave that guy the note I started crying, I definitely need to watch Kinky Boots now. I wanted to thank you so much for this content. I wonder how different the world would be if we let people be themselves.
It becomes toxic at the point that it's used as an excuse for abuse, and violence. Abuse, and violence are not masculine things. They don't make you manlier, nor do they "Prove" your masculinity, they're just wrong. There's an entire class of Hyper-Masculine killers. Serial and spree killers called Power Assertive, and they are obsessed with proving their masculinity. To the point that they murder people, as part of their Assertion of Power. (Hence the name.) At that point, it's pretty clearly toxic. When you can't tell the difference between "Being a man" and sadistic psychosis. When it becomes Lethal, a danger to people around you, that's the definition of Toxic.
The video paused and loaded at the EXACT instant you said to, at 3:36, and I just thought it was a really clever edit. I think it’s a sign that I should watch it
Instead of studying for my sociology final (that is partly on gender norms and stereotypes), i'll be watching this video... so basically, the same thing 🙃
So this is some pretty late news, but Kinky Boots is has a Blu-ray release (apparently it was around June 2022). Unfortunately, it seems to be only for A/1 regions so make sure your Blu-ray player is compatible.
So was anyone gonna tell me there's a Kinky Boots movie staring the KINGS Joel Edgerton and Chiwetel Ejiofor or was I supposed to find that out 15 years late in this video?
“Come on, you know I’m hot.”
That’s one deeply held presupposition I DON’T need to re-examine.
Yeah you are, no hetero.
Yeah I feel called out
OMG he so is...! 🤤
I feel personally called out, because it's the first thought I had when I saw what he looked like XD
@@GBfanatic15 Same
this is the kinky boots appreciation we all deserve
+
Why have I never heard of Kinky Boots before?!!!😻😻
@@legzfalloffgirl5148 yeah, why???
Highly recommend listening to the musical. It's fun music, it makes fun of itself, and has a good overall message (I mean, that's from the original movie but whatever). I just love the musical okay? The number of times I break out into the dumb love interest song is too often to count. It also ups the traditional masculinity of Lola and Don's fight thing, where instead of arm wrestling, they box.
I watched Kinky Boots because of this video, and it is now one of my favorite movies.
I cannot possibly express how much I enjoy everything about your channel and personality. You're undeniably one of my favourite creators, and I truly appreciate the work that you put into each video.
He's one of mine, too. He's so thoughtful and doesn't fall into the 'trap' of making bad faith arguments (a lot of other reviewers are *all* about the bad faith arguments). And it's always elevating to see white guy reviewers who're so level headed about feminism and non-binary genders.
Agreed! Was going to write something similar! So good!
I came here from his candyman video and I'm so happy I found this channel
@@hexmaniacgabby5160 honestly that's such a good video as well. His channel is one of my favourites
I forgot that he starred in kinky boots! We love actors with R A N G E
Apparently he got the role in "Redbelt" because David Mamet saw "Dirty Pretty Things" and "Kinky Boots" and said "There's no way the same actor can play both of those roles."
I laughed OUT LOUD
“Is this a stan video? Its not.. not that”
"i muted this so you don't have to" popped up as my finger was LITERALLY hovering over the mute button. i feel seen.
timestamp?
@@juliec5151 23:53
Who is that?
@@Genevieve1023 Ben Shapiro
@@patrickjackson5036 Thank you
"oh, and content warnings (some people get triggered by those)" from that, i could already tell it was going to be a great video
Yeah, he is a really good writer too!
The other day I searched for the MakeupAddiction subreddit (a sub for makeup recs, tutorials and looks) and one of the top results was a post in the MGTOW sub talking about how MUA is a "gold mine for Cluster B and damaged women", telling men to "be careful" and that "thots" were posting to the sub for validation. Why men going their own way were on a sub for makeup if they don't like makeup was definitely confusing to me.
Possibly closet or "stealth" transwomen, I guess.
For people that claim to go separate ways from women, they sure obsess over what women are doing.
On a similar note, I have absolutely no idea how men justify their hatred of women who take pride in their appearance or embrace their sexuality. Like, all the justifications I see are "Oh, she's a slut" "she's a whore" or "she's immoral." Why are some men so angry at women who profit from showing off their body? Like? It's other men that are giving her the money in the first place and they're almost always completely ignored from their hate.
@Harmony Alexandria
Yeah, exactly.
No one minds men choosing to not engage in relationships, it's a personal choice after all.
But when they claim to be going their own way, only to attack and discuss women and their evilness on a daily basis, that's when they should really change their group to "MHW", men hating women.
@@prikas4313 Yeah, most people who support themselves off sexwork are catering to men. The MGTOW who criticize and slut shame want us to think those men are being 'duped' or 'cuck'ed' into forking over their money. Maybe some guys are delusional about what sexwork is about, but if an adult who has money wants to spend it, you can argue that anyone he gives it over to for goods or services is "selling out" or deceptive. It's so shitty and toxic all around
"Whenever a men's rights activist cites some statistic about male combats fatalities, higher rates of mental illness, or harsher prison sentences, it's never an attempt to advocate for medical or judicial reform, it's only ever an attempt to shut women up." IVE BEEN SAYING THIS SINCE FOREVER THANK YOU 🙌
That's a drastic strawman, these are genuine issues with our society and dismissing every men's rights activist as just trying to shut women up is very disingenuous
Jay Buzzton I just think the men's activism movement is useless, since real feminists (not those fake "feminazis") also care and speak up about men's issues. Feminists believe in abolishing gender stereotypes, which would, in the end, favour men as well
@@jaybuzzton453
It's not a straw man - because it happens all too often. You *could* say it's a generalisation, but now we're being pedantic.
Men's issues are important and worth addressing. The issue I see regarding movements like the MRA and "red-pilling" is the conflation of men's rights advocacy (or fighting for social justice for men) with anti-feminism. One does not have to lead to the other.
@@mothsforeyes Agreed. It's the same game that plays the "straight pride parade", they don't even care about their sexual orientation or the problems they have, they just use it to atack the LGBT+ community.
anonymous on the topic of circumcision the truth is the risk factor for girls is much higher than men and the barbaric nature in which it is carried out and how it effects women’s lives is far more drastic. For girls it can make peeing and sex extremely painful and a botched female circumcision can make childbirth even more excruciating than it already is. Furthermore in Africa (where most female circumcision takes place) child marriages and circumcisions are linked as families circumcise their daughters to marry them off and verify to their husbands that they are virgins.
Meanwhile for male circumcision there are far less downsides, as it is rarely botched and actually can sometimes help std prevention.
I don’t think either are good, but I think sometimes women’s groups get angry at this comparison because the longstanding facts are that it is far worse for women when they are circumcised.
It's me, I'm the woman who looks cooler than all men in a leather jacket
hell yeah, flaunt that shit 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Rosa?
LIES!! DECEPTION!
I want to see!! :P (Don't be afraid please, I am a woman.)
I will take over that role, watch out
First of all,I'm with you on Chiwetel Ejiofor being one hell of an actor. He's,in my opinion, so underrated. Second,I'm new to this channel, but you are becoming my favourite. Your vids are fantastic. Keep up the good work!
Honestly didn't think about him much before watching this vid now realizing How great he is and how overlooked he is.
@@rickyhunt4075 Honestly,I was sure his career was going to explode after "12 years a slave" and I'm sad it hasn't...
@@marus815 I think hollywood is hesitant to hire a British Actor for American Roles. He should be much bigger though.
@@rickyhunt4075 that definitely does not check out, cos british actors are everywhere in american films. hollywood just does not have many leading roles for non-white actors cos they are cowards ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@@oof-wi7hp yup.. black male roles (especially as leads) are already so limited I feel like those that do exist are given to american black men
music in the intro is “Testosterone” by Bush. (not sure if it was sourced anywhere in the video but i figured some people might want to know like i did)
Recognised from the first four chords. Classic.
Thanks! I was pretty sure it was Bush but didn't know the song name.
I did, thanks!
"but it's descended into a fascist police state that incarcerates immigrants and other undesirables"
me watching in June of 2020: oh big yikes
It's October 24th 2020 and things have gotten... oh no.
November 13th 2020, THERES HOPE EVERYONE
December 18th 2020: things are slightly better, but 2024 does not look like a good time
January 12, 2021: Things have gotten oh no again.
February 3, 2021: Things are holding steady, but those in power are working hard to ensure that 2024 is the worst year in living memory
Masculinity, like femininity, is largely irrelevant. A strong woman is no less of a woman for being strong, and a gentle man is no less a man for being gentile. These are antiquated terms that serve no modern function.
In my opinion they only serve a use when talking about gender presentation as a descriptive, not to do with gender, sex, sexuality or romantic attraction.
It is important in administrative sense because men where (and are) used by every state as cannon fodder.
If you think that gender truly is irrelevant please propose that women should be included in a draft during emergency war time.
I will wait here...holding my breath and waiting to see the reaction of people.
@@jakubmike5657 There is no need for a draft emergency. We've been living in war time our entire lives. You are arguing a point that was not only never made, but is irrelevant to reality.
@@racewiththefalcons1 You think you lived in wartime?
Attacking someone on the other side of the world while having massive technological advantage, possibility to bug out and entire ocean to guard you from retalation is not war. Imagine actual war, with enemy who is close to your strenght in tech and has equal or greater number of people. Imagine loses going in tens of thousands from a single battle. How fast would you burn throught your reserves, how fast would you burn throught volunteers? USA issued draft for Vietnam war and it was largly by proxy. Draft is a sad neccesity in a situation of conventional war between oponnents of similar strenght.
Is it irrelevant to reality? I hope you are right, I really do. But at the same time I know that if shit hits the fan all talks about gender being a social construct will go out of the window and Johnny Jack and James will receive draft letters while Jane Joan and Janette will not.
personally i think if you're a gentile you are less of a man. grow up and read the torah
I have complex ptsd because I was an intellectual kid with little physical skill to him in the '90s. I've been harassed, punched, kicked, attacked with clubs and everything in-between because I was not "masculine enough". I had to learn to fight to survive and became damn good at it... it was my downfall. Now I'm 35, barely started to put my life back on tracks this year. I know for a fact that what they did collectively to me was wrong, I'm a dysfunctional adult, it took me years to get rid of my violent defensive impulses, I still have troubles with socialization as it leaves me anxious and obsessed with self-perfection to avoid discord, my emotions are in shamble. And it gave me nothing in exchange.
Bullying and hypermasculinity are actually an ablation of the ego with the goal of making you ready to sacrifice yourself in case of an emergency. It's basically a per-historical preschool for child soldiers. It serves nothing in the modern world, it's a cultural artifact of a world that came and past, but we lost the meaning of it all. In a world where 90% of men were likely to die before reproduction, it made some kind of utilitarian sense to protect survival, but in the modern world, where cooperation is key to a stable development due to increased international inter reliance and peace, those aggressive behaviors are counterproductive if not downright dangerous. This world of hyper-competition and aggression makes no sense anymore, but we didn't evolve yet for our time period. Genetically it takes tens of thousands of years to see changes based on mortality pre reproduction, we won't see that, we have to adapt while our primitive brains are left in the neolithic. We have to learn to recognize these dysfunctional instincts and learn to put them under check otherwise we will suffer from it and transfer them through painful experiences to the next generations who will, in turn, face the same issues we do about gender identity, violence, small egos easily bruised and hopeless social prospects.
By the way, I really like the final morale, accepting change was what saved me from self-inflicted death in the long run, I was one of the lucky ones, I was saved more than once from those destructive learnings by family, friends and myself... but it wasn't an easy treck to get where I'm finally starting (a bit) to feel happy most days, still a long way to go (at least until I die, there is always more land to cover in self-discovery). Real courage is facing demons, most of them live in your own skull.
Well said
Every now and again, the algorithm throws me a gem. Subscribed.
It's intresting that even though the whole Alpha and Beta thing has disproven, a lot, most people still see it as something valid
Except it hasn't...
arnean lmao of course it has this whole notion cane from a man a analyzing the power stricter of wolf pacs who ignored the fact that the wolves he analyzed were in captivity only. He came up with the terms alpha and beta to describe the hierarchy among them but later denounced all his claims of the “alpha beta structure” since it’s not even accurate with wolves since they have structures of family and not power dynamics in nature. And this by its founder denounced inaccuracy of “natural power dynamics” is where anti-feminists got both a lot of their lingo and also a certain view on men they deem weaker and try to belittle by calling them “beta”
@@bluejay2097 not to mention, this study was done using wolves that were unrelated, and therefore aggression ensued.
Wild wolf packs are a family structure, the "alphas" are the parents, and the rest of the wolves are their offspring.
this happens in alot of animals, and still in humans. It doesn't mean that it is the end all, be all and should be used to make all of our decisions, but it exists. Imagine in your head a beta male, then an alpha male (not a douchebag), and ask yourself which one you would want to lead you in an emergency situation. The Rock is an alpha male, people turn their heads when he walks into the room, he works hard, charming, physically imposing. Men want to be him and women want to be with him for these reasons. Sheldon from Big Bang Theory is a beta, physically weak and inept, and commands no respect from anyone. Walk into a young boys room and look at what posters he has on the wall, the athletes, action stars and comic characters are the alpha males that he wants to be when he grows up. What kid wants to be skinny Steve Rogers instead of Captain America? It being unfair doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
@@NoirTech83 the study that started the whole alpha-beta-omega was disproven because it didn't observe behaviour of 1 pack of wolfs, but a group of wolfs all from different packs (also out of their own territory). This meant that they were much more agessive and feeling unsafe in an unknown place filled with strangers. When the study was repeated in an actual pack, it showed that the leaders of the group weren't the stongest or more agessive, but those that difused conflict and nurtured. And that's why the whole thing was disproven. Of course stong people exist, and charismatic people, etc., but that doesn't necesarily means they're good leaders. The rock is not only phisically strong, he also takes part in many social projects and humanitarian efforts, and that gives him more points towards being a good leader, than how much he can bench press.
"part time bendy straw" 😂😂😂😂
I loved that line, too 😂😂
Anyone who has Lindsey Ellis on their side bar is my friend.
honestly, every time I find a new youtuber, I just have to check if they are one of the "good ones", or it would be a E;R situation again.....
What is the ER situation?
@@mysterious2007damn Oh E;R made a video on Legand of Korra that I thought was fairly funny and interesting, and then later when Pewdipie was recommending channels, I found out that E;R was somewhat alt-righty?? And then I kind of picked up the cues for it, so I decided to unsub from them.
I just felt that I should be more responsible for the channels I decide to support, if that makes sense. I had to unsub so many channels because I just cannot unsee it?
@@ambergong7201 Oh ER is a UA-camr. Thanks for the explanation.
@@ambergong7201
I really used to like E;R but his alt right tendencies are becoming undeniable like that weird rant about gender in the steven universe videos when the gems are aliens therefore human biology doesn't apply to them like it literally has nothing to do with it. His watchman video was the last straw for me though he watched one episode and then made a bunch of awful race realism jokes that didn't seem like jokes to me. It's like he went from attacking LGBTQ content to black content.
WOWOWOWOW... Einstein used to say “Any fool can know. The point is to understand.”, you understand ... thanks for making me think ... please accept a hug from lisbon, portugal, EU
I tought this was about masculinity, but actually was just an excuse to talk about Chiwetel Ejiofor best performances (which is fine to me).
Well... yes. Yes you are hot. And it's not just the physical. That's just a bonus. :D
Toootally agree
Support human extinction
Do the right thing
End the human disease
@@cognitivedissonance8406 Erm, I hope you're OK?
@@cognitivedissonance8406 Awww...thanks! I think...have a good day and don't jump into that mass grave too soon!
Raggle Taggle
Neither you nor I will be able to avoid it. The earth will be our mass grave. We are headed in precisely the right direction.
"What is masculinity?"
*aggressive rock music plays in background*
Me: nice
lol!...the type of music that comes first into my mind whenever I need to channel my masculinity
It's "Testosterone" by Bush and a very fitting song for this video!
@@kevin080592 When I need to channel my masculinity, I use Sabaton's "Panzer Batallion". I may or may not have grown chest hair and tripled my muscle mass while listening to that song.
i don't understand people's obsession with gender. i didn't grow up in a world where all men acted the same and thought the same or all women acted the same and thought the same. i couldn't guess who someone is from their biological sex; i'd have to get to know them. did other people grow up in some other world?
A lot of people gain their self worth and confidence from what they believe are the most desired traits and images of their gender. To criticize, critique, or just slightly engage with our strict gender norms is for many people an attack on who they believe they are. Gender, sex, and identity become inseparable... its so damn childish
Yea I dont get it either, my gender/genitals has never been my identity, in a gender fluid way or a "MGTOW" way. I just happen to be female and have female genitals and express myself in ways that make me happy. Most people dont see me the way I see myself, that's always going to be the struggle of expression and identity and relationships. You can express all the traits you find to be peak masculinity but that doesnt mean people will see those traits as peak masculinity or view you as masculine or desirable or acceptable because of those traits. Because people are more than that cheap flat cutout.
Its funny, he talks about the toxic aspect of it being about controlling other people, but you see it on both extremes, trans/gender fluid and anti feminists wanting to control how other people perceive them, and control how they are addressed without realizing the hypocrisy of that mentality.
Well, I happen to be female too, and if there is something I have learned in years of experience that that it is necessary to talk about gender not because I have an issue with it, but because people who do impact my life in a negative manner. Either by legislating in an attempt to control my body (and I am not just talking about abortion rights there), or by not bothering to test how the female body reacts to drugs as opposed to the male body, or by not taking me seriously in situations in which they absolutely should just because I am not male. And I am very aware that what I have to deal with is nothing compared to what trans/gender flued people have to face. So I don't think that you can put what trans/gender fluid people talking about on one level of what anti-feminist people are talking about. AT ALL!!!! One group is talking about the topic in order to defend their right be what they are. The other group is talking about the topic in order to deny other people their rights. That is an important difference.
@@swanpride oh I dont think people should be oppressed for expressing themselves. Ita more like...when gender identity is so important to two different parties, what makes one different, acceptable and one not? I dont care how people express their identity as long as it's not hurting anyone. But I do care when they expect me to participate and support their beliefs in what gender is and how they experience it. But they cant convey and explain to me why their experience of it is more valid than other peoples, and why that means the system needs to change (to either reinforce toxic masculinity, or to be reconfigured to accommodate identity into the laws that govern everyone rather than facts, not just laws not to discriminate against people or abuse them in conversion camps)
And I mean it is important to re-explore on an individual and social level why all bathrooms should not just be universal anyways, or why sports are separated info male and female athletes. How hospitals identity physical factors in patients versus how they socially treat patients. But we have to fully explore the pros and cons of each and they why's before we barrel ahead and change it to accommodate it for a minority. We wouldnt do that just because some men just *feel* like malware are superior to females, so why would we do that because some people just feel like their identity genital combo is off?
With sexuality, its just so straight forward. Anyone is physically capable of sexually pleasuring anyone else. With consent, that hurts no one and steps on no ones rights. With gender queer, there is no consenting, it's just "this is how we perceive ourselves, and your perception is invalid". And that concept is not acceptable anywhere else in society. You can express yourself any way you want, but that doesnt mean other people consent to participate or believe you are what you present yourself as. (Furry, catgirl, or recognize your homemade halloween costume of a character that's had multiple depictions is your own depiction of the character, art is subjective because perception is subjective).
Naturally your perception in invalid. How would you feel if someone tells you "well, I perceive you as a man". You would insist that your perception is one which counts. And rightly so. Frankly, this is just about not being a dick to people.
Kilts are warmer, thank you very much.
Cludora Not an hundred percent fresh-sheared fine Scottish wool, laddie!
Is this you you, or is it one of your characters that's commenting here?
Will a workout program for cis women get me cheekbones like you?
I so agree with you wholeheartedly. I am very young and lack a lot of experience. But so often I look at the men in my life who want so much to control me out of righteousness. And I realise I a seventeen year old girl am more of a man than all of them. Cause I know there is nothing strong about stubbornness. I relish being wrong and realising it. And they are but children throwing tantrums at the truth until it goes away.
man i did not have half as much sense as you do at your age 🌺💕
I am very young and lack a lot of experience.
I relish being wrong and realising i
And they are but children throwing tantrums at the truth until it goes away.
Error...does not compute.
Look at this:
I realise that being young and lacking experience makes it almost impossible for me to be certain of what is going on, and people of greater experience try to tell me something but they are just wrong and I know that despite previously admitting of lacking experience to make educated guesses. Because I am internally consistent!
@@jakubmike5657
Why would you tell someone that they're inconsistent in such a cold and curt manners, if the more effective way would be to ask? -
Hey Noemie,
if you know you don't know everything that can be known about certain things, how sure can you be if that other people are just throwing tantrums? Do they really not have a point? May it be, that you are writing all this only to affirm yourself in what you believe, without allowing other people to change your mind?
-
A question you need to ask yourself Jakub: were you pointing out the internal inconsistency in her comment, because you wanted to teach Noemie logic? Or was your goal only to expose the inconsistency of this single expression by one person, without acknowledging, that in the big picture some men _do_ try to cancel out what women are trying to say pretty often?
I find that your comment lacks explanation and doesn't attempt to be very helpful. Perhaps you're not very good at communicating and you really were trying to help and I'm sorry if everything I assume about you is wrong. Your slight unhelpfulness makes you seem like someone who just tells someone else how they should do things -without enabling that person to make their own choices. Maybe being less ironic in the wrong place would help too?
@@WindspriteM You are right, it was cold I apologise.
this comment section is cute💕
What is needed to form a well rounded man is an understanding and acceptance of weakness. Contempt of it creates a fragile human.
The slow zoom in on Ben Shapiro's smug little face made this an 9/10 to an 11/10 video.
And so punchable
I still dont know why he is soo hated.... i mean what did you expect
@@deninpaul7509 I think you do know and you're either asking this question to get an angry reply to "own the libs" or you just don't see it. Despite having a doctor as a wife, Ben Shabibo is constantly undermining the actual experiences of women in the professional field and women retaking their sexuality out of the narrative control of men. So, yeah. Not only that he maintains being friends with alt-right shitheads who only use him as "their Jewish friend" and who would just as quickly drop him if he showed any signs of not towing the line.
Smart, hilarious, and insightful. Missed this guy.
I love all your videos. And as a mother of a transgender child, I think you handled this topic very well. :)
❤
thank you for loving your child ;_;
As a Trans adult child of cis parents.
I don't think you should use your kid as your woke card.
@@ghumashenaa4414
No.
Basic parenting doesn't get cookies.
Trans kids are lot less than and you don't need praise for loving them.
It's a minimal requirement.
@Tanum Tasdfy
I don't think I agree with you.
Your comment makes you look like a transphobe.
So... Elaborate on that ?
Man...I’m so glad I learned about your channel this summer. Each and every one of your videos is an absolute joy to watch, and you somehow get better with each one you post. You’re so well-informed, and have such a pleasant, noncondescending demeanor when you’re presenting the information you’ve clearly put in a lot of work to research. Just...really great stuff, keep doing what you’re doing!!
Am I the only one who's elated that a dude can be THIS conventionally attractive and be THIS much of a feminist?
Oh no. Is this what they call the "big gay"? Is this what it's like?
I would be no help here, my big gay is directed towards the female gender
Yes sir and congratulations
I know several conventionally attractive men who are feminists.
@@johannageisel5390 Then direct them my way please. Despite what my username suggests I'm a lonley women person.
@@joethejanitor845 Sadly, they all have girlfriends or boyfriends already. Otherwise I would snatch one myself.
Pausing right now to watch Children Of Men. See you later! :D
How was it?
@@clean310 Still watching. Fascinating movie. But God damn, I wasn't prepared for so much violence!
Also in the video to save you several pauses: Serenity, Redbelt, Dirty Pretty Things, Kinky Boots
@@pavarottiaardvark3431 Thanks :) love Serenity
It's good but I won't forgive that director for I am autism. Refuse
This video is amazing. This is the internet I signed up for.
Gender is a cultural construction. Always has been, always will be. And not all cultures use the binary, as many have what are called third genders. This gets to that without actually stating it.
I never get the need for third gender. Because it opens neccesity for fourth (What if you do not feel like part of first three right) and fifth and sixth and eventually we should just give up and say there are as many genders as there are humans since everyone has there own variations of expression. It is just easier to say there is X and not-X. And sure lines get fuzzy when you zoom in hard enough which is why people are confused (kind of like finding definitive line between orange and red on a color wheel) so it is a declaration statement, but creating additional categories just moves the goal post to new line (what if I am right on the line of third one and second one?).
When you accept simple notion that muscle bound cigar smoking, killing machine who throws one liners around is a man and a guy who likes sewing and poetry is a man... it just becomes easier.
@@jakubmike5657 one modern version of third legal SEX not gender, is intersex. It is practical because it lets kids who are born very mixed decide for themselves what they want for their (probably delayed) puberty. Third gender in history is for instance the Indian hijra (eunuchs, intersex, and transgender people).
Certainly one of the better youtube essays I have seen on UA-cam 😄
TL;DW: Chiwetel Ejiofor is a beautiful man who is sexy in a variety of roles.
God I love this guy. As a woman who has had predominantly negative interactions with men I am actively trying to understand men, and how society affects them, so I can begin to have a more positive opinion of men in general (or at least not see them as inherently dangerous). This man gives me hope.
get a load of this guy^^
As a guy who’s had predominantly negative experiences with women I greatly sympathize with you I can’t speak for all men but I can elaborate on some general or universal experiences and issues men go through in our modern society
You basically got abused by some punk and you think masculinity is to blame?
More movies to put on my "must watch"-list...
I just wrote a long comment about my personal experience with and view of masculinity as a trans man, but it got way too long, so I gave up and deleted all of it. Well, anyway, great video! I'm not sure if you reached the intended audience, but you certainly reached this soyboy here :)
It would actually have been interesting for me to read.
Nobody is forced to read through a wall of text, so don't feel shy to post one. Those who don't want to engage with it, can just skip to the next comment.
@@johannageisel5390 Yeah, I didn't really think about other people finding my comment too long. It's just that I had already written so much and had just barely scratched the surface, and since I didn't feel like sitting here for an hour writing a comment, but also didn't want to leave a comment that wasn't finished, I just deleted it. It's really hard to write a youtube comment about a topic like this, because it's all way to complicated and a lot of nuance is lost when trying to be concise.
@@ichbinben. Ah, yes, I know that feeling.
@@ichbinben. You could make a video about it?
Always appreciating solid research and well thought out arguments. Great content as per usual! Thanks for communicating progressive (although they shouldn’t be thought of as such) ideas and the concept of changing ones mind/belief/preconceived notions. Loved the video!
"I muted this footage so you don't have to"
*Oh my god I love you so much*
12:56 YES I’m glad I’m not the only one that thinks the MGTOW movement is trash
That ending = POWER MOVE *claps from now to infinity*
Mark my words comrade, You are going places.
This is the kind of conversations we need to have about masculinity and dudes, I don't like just saying man bad bc it's not what is needed, it just creates more animosity.
Louder for the people in the back! This video has so many good points that I can't even list them all.
+
omg I know, strong men are so outdated
I have had to pause the video to go find and rent Children of Men. You have no idea how hard it is for me to wait to watch this video, but I shall do it because I’ve been wanting to see the movie for such a long time.
As a trans guy who has struggled with my perceived masculinity and how I don't necessarily fit into rigid boxes of manhood, this video is just what I needed. Not only was it a refreshing take, I have new movies to watch as well as a new favorite channel. I knew you were great before this, don't get me wrong, but yeah. Thank you so much for this video and the time, effort, and hard work you put into making them.
You are a woman whatever you say
Yeah Masculinity is not for you and you'll never get it
I liked this essay the first time I watched it, but over time I've come to realize that it's one of my all time favorites (up there with Who's Afraid of Modern Art and The Ethics of Satirizing Nazis). I love the idea of looking at different expressions of one gender identity through the lens of film. I love your unbelievably clean conclusion debunking bioessentialism. I love the excitement on your face when you don't want to give away the Chiwetel bit yet. So well-executed, and started a really productive conversation with my mom about sex vs gender.
Thank you for muting Benny at the end. That was a very thoughtful editing choice.
Femininity and masculinity definetly exist, but neither of them is inherently only for women or only for men. I personally like things that are neither feminine nor masculine (like science, astronomy and critical thinking) but I'm not non-binary or intersex.
@Krista Star
Exactly,
so, we can dismantle them.
As any other stereotypes,
asap, please.
I am non-binary and I see it like the yin and yang does.
As complements of each other, but both needed to form a person.
So I don't understand the fight to separate the two.
@KRYMauL Those are roles which were placed upon the genders since the beginning of humanity.
Roles can not be inherited biologically.
Exactly. I mean who needs feminism anyway?
P Ferreira Everybody expected to fall in line.
you need to be considered a part of breadtube! this video is excellent!
He is considered that way by me lol
@@BeautifulEarthJa me too
For me, masculine and feminine are not bad traits at all. Like the yin and yang, they compliment what we need. Now, whether it is a man who exhibits traditionally feminine traits such as being gentle, caring, and quiet, or the woman being assertive, in control, and violent... well, gender doesnt matter. Are you lit from the inside by fire or moonlight? Both are necessary, and both have their flaws. Femininity can be seen as being passive and weak, and masculinity as brash and unpleasant. Each person holds both of these aspects within, only to varying degrees.
nope, traits don't have gender...
caring...you think being caring is feminine trait?
And being assertive a masculine one?
traits do not have a gender.
Do you know why being agressive was considered masculine trait?
Because for majority of history nations had a very weak police forces, and state did not have a monopoly on violence. You wanted to be safe you had to protect yourself (and of course your closest neighours who in turn help to protect you) . Being capable of violence was a good trait in a man because it ment he can protect his own family. If woman was agressive she would be quickly overwhelmed by a man who has massive strenght and endurance advantage in most situations. It is not that women are not agressive, it is that in most situations being physically agressive would end very badly for them. Look at descriptions of ancient wars, women were not even considered enemy combatants...they were loot.
Traits do not have a gender buddy
@@ineedausername9617 Gender doesn't exist in the first place!
@@NoirTech83 , you're correct, my bad!
I clicked this video to learn what your take on masculinity is and came out respecting Chiwetel Ejiofor even more. Wow. I stan one very versatile man.
It's sort of a sad fact of how masculinity is viewed that just by virtue of being someone with such open, public, non-toxic masculinity you're now my absolute favorite man. Thank you for this absolutely stellar video essay!
the last part made me feel so much better about myself. it’s so fucking comforting. i think you’re the only man i’d every truly trust. i want to be more like you and wish more were as open as you were!
I wish I'd figured some of these things out earlier in life, but fairly early, in my 20's, I realized what a foolish game it was to be a ______. Don't be a ______. Be you, an individual. That's enough work.
This is one of my favorite videos on UA-cam. As a person with very little time to watch videos -- and practically no time to engage with them -- I watch everything at 2x speed. I want to hear video hosts talk quickly. It sounds weird to me to hear speech in this medium at a regular pace. It sounds like every syllable is drawn out needlessly. But with this video, it has to be regular speed for me, even over multiple viewings. There's so much to hear in this video. So much to absorb. So much value.
Great new video ~ Love it partially because the actor is amazing and half the movies you mentioned, I haven't seen yet and now I'm gonna watch them. But also, I was thinking how ContraPoints mentioned in a video about men how some might in fact need a sense of masculine identity. And how female feminists can't carve out a distinct, nontoxic masculinity for men even if we try. Because she believes this is something only dudes can do for themselves.
I think this might be a good way to start--by critically analyzing who you're told to be and how those traits manifest, and what might be harmful or not. Maybe ContraPoints is wrong and boys don't really need a distinct sense of masculinity (just as girls don't *really* need to embrace femininity either). But if masculinity and femininity are in constant change and no trait is inherent to any gender, then whatever identities we carve out in the future, whether or not they're in any way related to sex or gender, being adaptable and open to change will make a difference in ensuring the toxicity is left behind.
Also. I love the video's last line. Made me snap my fingers.
Not gonna lie: ContraPoints' video on men & masculinity is what first sparked the idea for this video.
@@coldcrashpictures Are you ever going to talk about how people always believe that a feminist characters have to be masculine to be empowering? Never feminine. It's almost as masculinity=strong and femininity=weak.
@@vibing6530 it's not a bad point but isn't it overdone by now? I'm not against 101 Feminist Discourse, but it's ground that's been covered
Loved this video !!!
Can I ask you to accept subtitles ? I'm French and would love to share those videos (especially to friends) but some have trouble with English! I'd love to help to translate ;)
Please do!!! I'm told you can just follow this link to start adding subtitles: ua-cam.com/users/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UCfjy9IdZ2n0_OIXPf2VQw4Q&tab=2
There was not one single second of this video I didn't thoroughly enjoy or find extremely well-written and well-thought-out. Thank you so much.
the long awaited chiwetel ejiofor appreciation video
I wanted to click “like” about 15 times during this video
"Ah fuck. I already liked it? What do I do now? The pressure to do something is killing me!"
This video essay was well-thought, well-spoken, examples well-chosen, footage well-edited... absolutely fantastic work!
"They're not the ones with psychosis, you are."
Love it.
Keep up the good work.
Renegade Cut
Pop Culture Detective
coldcrashpictures
The Holy Trinity
I love your videos and i appreciate you so much for talking about these topics. Thank you!!!
This video was awesome. I am physically what most people would call archetypical male: tall, lantern jawed, fit, deep voice, I have 'great big bushy beard'. But that is about it, I would definitely call myself feminist, I am vegan (love me some soybeans), detest sports, and not particularly competitive or at least overtly. I like wood-working and working on cars but my mother taught me to sew, and I love sewing.
I would have used to say that it isn't very masculine to stand around and worry about how another man thinks of you. It doesn't seem very 'manly' to have your self-worth dependent upon what another person thinks of you. But now, I would say it is about being humanist. No man or woman should base their worth about how some rando thinks about you.
And I am comfortable enough to say: yeah, you are a good looking guy.
Your videos are so helpful with my writing in terms of character development, I feel like you really get to the root of what makes a good character a good character while also relating it to real life situations making it so much easier to create a message and tone for anyone trying to make their own stories
Love this video, my favourite on screen version of masculinity is Newt Scamander, I find movies where they stereotype characters according to gender, race or sexual orientation to be boring and derivative. Thank you :-)
Excellent video, I'll have to check the rest of the channel out, and also binge all of Chiwetel Ejiofor's movies.
3:32 I actually did just that, paused the video and went to watch the film.
Absolutely worth it. Great movie!
I had to pause the video to watch all the movies and understand everything. Worth it!
Greetings from Ecuador
Did you watch Predator?
“Come on you know I’m hot” made me actually giggle and look away.
Gotta say, I hope it had the same effect on any rude commenters.
slow-clap. ugh my sociologist heart is so happy right now. love love love. good job!!!!
Click-bate title: Hot feminist soy-boy talks about gender and recs all the movies you need to make it through the holiday season.
*clickbait
So now that everyone knows I flunked second grade spelling...
He just wrecked everyone with facts and logic.
@@harlanhardway5955 that's why you have 0 logic sense
Forgive my ignorance but what does a soy-boy mean? This is the first time ever hearing that word.
@Maple Lord What does it say for your intelligence, that you can't even explain what you're defending?
Wow, I love this video and I 100% agree with us all needed that blue-ray copy of Kinky Boots
Thank you for muting that part for us, you're a considerate person.
Smart, eloquent, feminist, AND loves Kinky Boots? I think I may have found my ideal man!
He might love some pegging at night too
And oh wait , if there's an intruder..he'll envourage you to be on front because he's a feminist
I feel like there's been a changing wind recently.
I'm seeing more and more discussions about what is good and admirable in entertainment instead of always talking about what is bad and has to be banished.
Over the last year, the discussion about fairness and equality in media seemed to have taken the form of insisting that everyone has to be the same, and looking down on people trying to do things that are different.
3:35 I paused it because I haven't seen that movie! Will return to this video after watching. Might take a while because I can't access it here in Finland
Why have I never heard about "Kinky boots"? Sounds right up my alley. Thanks for discovering it to me!
I believe more and more this is a discussion we should be having. Thanks for the great content.
There is such a thing as female masculinity. Something I've explored. Great video as always.... edit. Covered. You're brilliant.
When Lola gave that guy the note I started crying, I definitely need to watch Kinky Boots now. I wanted to thank you so much for this content. I wonder how different the world would be if we let people be themselves.
Came for the title. Stayed for the content and the host's dashing good looks.
It becomes toxic at the point that it's used as an excuse for abuse, and violence. Abuse, and violence are not masculine things. They don't make you manlier, nor do they "Prove" your masculinity, they're just wrong. There's an entire class of Hyper-Masculine killers. Serial and spree killers called Power Assertive, and they are obsessed with proving their masculinity. To the point that they murder people, as part of their Assertion of Power. (Hence the name.) At that point, it's pretty clearly toxic. When you can't tell the difference between "Being a man" and sadistic psychosis. When it becomes Lethal, a danger to people around you, that's the definition of Toxic.
Yup. I'm sold. You're my new favorite channel.
So glad this was recommended to me.
Consider me subscribed comrade!
I love this video - I’ve come back to it so many times.
My testosterone just dropped by 400 nano-grams per decilitre after watching this video
alright, one video and im already subscribing. good stuff
**Me commenting to increase engagement so the algorithm spreads this**
The video paused and loaded at the EXACT instant you said to, at 3:36, and I just thought it was a really clever edit. I think it’s a sign that I should watch it
Instead of studying for my sociology final (that is partly on gender norms and stereotypes), i'll be watching this video... so basically, the same thing 🙃
I'm now ready for my socio exam, thank you for this enlightening video
So this is some pretty late news, but Kinky Boots is has a Blu-ray release (apparently it was around June 2022).
Unfortunately, it seems to be only for A/1 regions so make sure your Blu-ray player is compatible.
So was anyone gonna tell me there's a Kinky Boots movie staring the KINGS Joel Edgerton and Chiwetel Ejiofor or was I supposed to find that out 15 years late in this video?
Oh man I’m so glad I stumbled upon your channel. I’m 3 minutes in and already can tell this is going to be very informative. Keep it up!
I’m just going to watch this video later, but I am intrigued by the title.
I liked the video.
Stumbled on a gem of a channel!