WIDOW BRAIN FOG: It is a REAL thing! Why we experience Widow's Brain // One Happy Widow
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- Опубліковано 10 лют 2025
- In this live session, we discuss Widow Brain, AKA Widow Fog and the scientific reason behind it. I will share my experiences with it, and see who else might have some stories to share. This is a very real thing, but it is also something that will not last forever. How to spot it, what to expect, and how long does it usually last.
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MEDICAL DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, counselor, or any other medical professional. Information in this video is not meant to be interpreted as medical advice. I am simply sharing my own experiences in my grief journey. If you feel that your needs are beyond the scope of the informational content of this video, please seek medical advice from your doctor to discuss treatments or medications that may be available to you. If you are having feelings or thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-8255
Helping you find your happy in the grieving process
Life, Love, and Laughter after Loss
Thank you for sharing your experience, it's a big help!!! I've never lived alone before! I went from living with my Father & Mother to marriage that didn't work out because of abuse, than I met my husband and stayed married for 52 years. We shared so many years together, having babies, watching them grow up to be strong, big hearted women! They have their own busy life's! Now he's no longer coming home! My empty house , and knowing he's not ever coming threw the door again!
That’s a huge transition….I know it is difficult! #widfam
I'm here to learn things to help my mother better. We lost my father this year and she sounds a lot like you.
@@SuBeKuTah If you have any questions, feel free to ask! I’m an open book. In the beginning I couldn’t talk about it. Saying his name made me cry. I use to wake up sobbing from sound sleep. I think my heart was so broken, but that hasn’t happened in a while now. I had an upper and lower scope done and they put me asleep for it. When I woke up I felt rested but they told me that I cried during the whole procedure. Ask Dr. about it on next visit, he said don’t worry about it a lot of people cry under the procedure.
I took my husband into ER because his leg was hurting. They gave him 3 meds. That stopped his heart. They brought him back but I never heard him talk again, couldn’t breathe on his own and was in ICU for 90 days. Than we transferred to a hospital that had a new brain stimulation that didn’t help. I had to sign papers and let him go!
I never found out what was wrong with his leg. All of that happened so fast!
So many bills that I can’t afford, in probate, got a lawyer and he said they protect Drs. So I’m here with no husband, stacks of bills and no help around the corner!!!
Ask me anything I’m sure I’ve been through it!!!
Hold your mom, let her talk when she wants, but I’m sure you’re just as broken hearted as she is. You have all that in common. My daughters are in just as much pain as I am. I’m so sorry for your loss! Big hugs from afar!!!
@@nancyculhanehoag7936 Thank you for sharing your story! Losing your husband so suddenly must be horrible! And I'm so sorry to hear about all the challenges you're facing now. It sounds like your husband wasn't in very good hands. Thankfully, my mother doesn't have to worry too much about bills as my parents have great insurance, even for our generally high standards here. But there is still a lot of admin, even though it has subsided meanwhile. My mother still gets nervous about any admin stuff in the post almost a year after, so we children are doing a lot of it for her.
My father was ill for a good 3 months with what looked like an infection and it got worse and worse until he agreed to go to the hospital. It had never been as bad since his body didn't have a lot of substance left, but he had survived a lot of things that looked really bad before, so even his own doctor who knew him well and has a lot of experience thought he'd recover once treated properly. Unfortunately, it wasn't a good time of year, just before a long weekend and our hospitals have turned really bad during the last couple of years due to the lack of caregivers, so they didn't really do much for a couple of days. The responsible specialist paid him a visit but before he was back from the weekend, an ulcer that nobody had seen burst open in my father's lung and poisoned his whole system. They put him into an artificial coma and the last thing we heard from him was to do anything to keep him alive as he wasn't ready to go. He even made sure someone would take care of charging his phone. He was in a coma for 10 days, for a week improving slowly but steadily the last 3 days of which they slowly woke him up, so he could open his eyes again and look around. He wasn't fully there and couldn't speak but seemed to understand communication. Then, his state worsened again for a few days and he died.
My mother was in a really bad state herself at that point as she had exhausted herself physically and emotionally for months while caring for him. She had major issues functioning for a while. It's getting better, but she still isn't as she used to be, which brought me to this video because she says her brain doesn't work as usual. Thankfully, 2 of us children are less than an hours drive away, so we can help out here and there.
Of course, I'm missing my father and still grieving myself and also had and still have other big challenges in my life this year. I just let it flow whenever it comes up, the emotions and the tears. But it's much worse for my mother as her everyday life has changed completely and she has this empty house and the deep sadness and feeling of loss too. My father passed away half a year before their 50th wedding anniversary.
I'm learning more things about grief and how it is for widows because she does talk to me and it seems to be helpful when I have picked something up that means this or that is a normal part of the process and nothing is wrong with her personally, especially when she feels that her brain or body don't work as usual.
Much love and hugs to you, and to your daughters too! Thank you. ❤
I joined the Facebook group about two weeks ago and it has been amazing - so helpful! It is a lovely group. ❤
Thanks so much for your feedback!
😂❤Thank You!!!
I am completely encouraged by what you've said ... all of it.
Because you remember everything you forgot.
God bless you my sister and widowhood.
Thanks for watching
What a relief to understand this! I go right into a fog every time I am visiting David in nursing home he has dementia. I always wondered what was happening to me and now I know🙏🏻
I’m so glad you watched! #widfam
I only had 3 paid days off from work and when I went back to work it was a disaster I couldn’t function. Widow’s brain is so real!
Yes, it is! Returning to work was difficult- my heart just isn’t into it anymore, yet I can’t afford to quit just yet. Maybe next year!
The relief from learning this gave me tears. Thank you.
I’m so glad…thanks for watching! #widfam
My daughter rolled her eyes when I told her about Widow's Fog.
One day, she will see.😊
I still have widow brain, and it's been almost 7 years since my husband died. I'm SO tired of being stupid!!
At this point, it might not just be widows brain…could be other factors! Have you talked to a doctor about it? Maybe supplements could help, how’s your diet? Praying the fog clears soon #widfam
I've had an MRI and an EEG, and those came back normal. I did psychometric testing and was told...yep, you have serious memory problems. I've had blood drawn many times, and everything came back normal. I've been to so many providers that I stopped going because I kept getting told that they didn't know how to help me. It's just been so hard because I'm all alone now, and I'm struggling to support myself because of these problems. Thank you for your response.
I lost my husband to vascular dimentia 3 weeks ago. It was an intense last 2 months. I was the caregiver for the 8 years of his disease. Now I feel I am in shock a little. This is such important information. I have no idea how to navigate this. I lost my husband and he was my business partner. Now I have to decide when to get on a physical stage to speak again. I am very concerned that I will start to cry uncontrollably.
I have no idea how to navigate this next stage. So THANK YOU.....
Feel free to watch my other videos, and join our FB group for more support. Www.Facebook.com/groups/onehappywidow
My husband died of dementia after only about 1 - 1 1/2 years so I know what you are experiencing.
Hello from BC Canada. I lost my husband five years ago from a Glioblastoma brain tumour. I thought I was doing ok but your widows fog is ringing true for me. I have an Apple phone and found if I use reminders in my phones calendar it really helps. I can set a reminder for a day ahead and then another for anywhere from 15 minutes up to 2 hours ahead. I was just diagnosed with breast cancer so am so glad I’ve got this feature.
Love listening to your videos. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one experiencing this. Good luck.
I think I will try to use this! Thanks for the tip. Praying for you… #widfam
Thank you what a blessing because I thought I was losing it!
Thanks for watching! #widfam
I lost my husband last June, he had been sick eight years with myasthenia gravis auto immune disease, and then April 1 last year we found out he had terminal colon cancer that it spread. He went home June 26. I found you on here I really like Your videos. They are very comforting
Thanks for watching, and for sharing part of your experiences with us. #widfam
I‘m so deeply sorry for all your loses, i Hope you find Moments of Sunshine in your Heat ❤.
Lost my dad (my Person from the day i was Born) almost 2 years ago, so maybe i‘m Not Right here, but hearing you Tell your Story really helps my pain.
Sending Love and light, to all suffering, from Austria. ♥️
Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback.
You’ve lost your Father,you loved with all your heart! You belong here, we’re all here because we need to talk!Have someone that’s understands what you’re going through! Broken 💔
Thanks sò much for sharing ! I'm in the 2nd year of grieving and I also thought I'm losing my mind. Marlène NZ
Thanks for watching #widfam
I really appreciate your channel- has helped me so much.
Thanks for watching #widfam
Your hair looks lovely here Leo. I love it like this 😊
Thank you, that is kind of you to say!
Before my husband died we had to sell our property. Then I had to clean out the house. I had help, but a lot of things I wanted to save disappeared.. I couldn't remember if I had eaten or showered. I couldn't sleep. Had the doctor prescribed a sleep aid. I'm a year out now and my brain is much better.
Definitely sounds like widow’s fog!
After 27yrs of marriage, my dear husband passed away on 2/9/22. I started a new job this week and I've have been forgetting the training material covered...Yikes.Thank you for discussing this topic.
My brain is Swiss cheese these days! I think o have found out that it’s not having a regular routine that is causing mine.
Also sounds like what happens in long term caregiving for me.
It can definitely happen with caregiving as well- you are grieving too! #widfam
Thirteen is my husband’s number. It was his lucky number ever since he was a child. His favorite football player was Dan Marino (#13). We had lived in our house for 13 years when he died. He was buried on August 13th. I went back to work 13 days after he died. My grief course was 13 weeks long. I bought a new cellphone shortly after he died (iPhone 13) and when I went to choose his headstone, the GPS said I would travel 13 miles on I-85 S. to Exit 13. On a different note, he died on the same date as his father (August 10th), which I believe is their new shared birthday in Heaven!
Numbers can be so interesting! #widfam
Thanks for another video.
Thanks for watching! #widfam
I remember being on a call regarding finances shortly after my husband died, 8 yrs ago in May, and I couldn't remember my address !
This is definitely a symptom! #widfam
I have started to stutter, the forgetful ness is horrible ,the worst is being alone with alot of opportunists around trying to to take advantage of $$$$ wise.
Just thinking, but I have a question, since you've remarried, do you still have a hard time moving forward ? I thought if and when I meet someone else maybe i'll feel 'normal' again. Just wondering.
A lot of things have returned to a more “normal” daily routine. I have a companion to do things with, someone to take care of the manly things around the house, and the loneliness of solitary life is over. We are a 2-income family again. It doesn’t take away my grief or the fact that I miss him every day. It also doesn’t bring back a dad for my kids. Interesting question, and no one has asked me before, thanks for asking! #widfam
@@OneHappyWidow thank you
I lost my husband Fathers Day 2024.He was hit on his motorcycle.I am definitely experiencing widows brain! I am so numb and confused!
I’m so sorry you are on this journey. A motorcycle purchase is why Dewey even had life insurance. I wouldn’t let him ride until he got himself one.
Royce from Chicago-Widow Brain since husband passed August 2022. So challenging
Yes, it can be! I think I have finally got a handle on it, but the fog still rolls in every once in a while! #widfam
As for me ~ This video spot on. Me 5 years out be 6 this May. But my brain still says 5 years like stuck on that
I’m still affected, and I’m almost 5 years out as well! #widfam
LH had dementia and I thought I had it also cause mine has continued from time to time
It might be! #widfam
Had my soulmate for 31 years side by side. Hardly ever apart. When she died in Jan 2019 my mind shut down almost. I know I got on the ball and took care of all finacial stuff. She used to do it and i had to jump in. But other than that I dont remember that entire year. I have no idea what I did. Now 6 years later all I do it sit at the PC or sleep. I have nothing but our little dog to get up for. Everyone else is dead and I have no friends except online. I still cry every day unless I self medicate myself into a zombie. But I remember stuff now and know what Im doing.
Have you joined our FB group? Lots of positive support there: facebook.com/groups/onehappywidow or you can try a local chapter of Grief Share or even some therapy or counseling. You need to go outside, get sun on your face and fresh air…and be around people! Find your tribe and make a point of joining some sort of event, then update us and let us know how it goes.
Excellent!
Thanks for watching #widfam
Can you help me to understand procrastination and grief
That sounds like a motivation issue due to grief or depression. It’s hard to say without knowing how long you’ve been widowed and other circumstances in your life. If you are interested in my pivot course, you might be a good candidate for it- email me at onehappywidow@gmail.com
Late watcher missed the live From Oklahoma
Thanks for watching the replay! #widfam
Hello from Louisiana , loved this talk I felt like I must be going crazy , I forgot what I’m doing where I’m going all the time . Happy to know I’m not crazy just still lost in the fog,
My bi-weekly chiropractor appointments completely dropped out of my brain, even though they confirm them the day before. I broke a few confirmed appointments, which I had NEVER done before widow’s brain. It’s still a struggle to remember them.
I’m having the same issues! #widfam
I am going on 4 months, and I have to write everything down or I might forget.
Widows' brain is real!
Yes it is!
And again I forgot your live video! I've become a crier recently. Haven't been this. way since.... lol I can't remember. There are two widow brain moments I've had. One I still do. I go to the drive through for my ice coffee a few times a week. When Donnie died Jan last year, I'd order my drink, ge to the window & pay. I then have driven off without me drink ! I've started doing it again. The other funny thing...... I was driving with my cousin from NC. There's only like 4 sets of traffic lights in the whole town of Raymond NH where I live. I'm driving along, drove right through a red light totally clueless! I kept driving to get my ice coffee. The red light was about a quarter mile from the dunkin donuts. Near the entrance my directional was on. I glanced in the mirror & see blue lights. Asked my cousin if he had pulled a car over. She laughed & said.... ahhh... He's following you. I couldn't help but laugh realizing how far he had followed me. He comes to the car & nicely asked if I knew I went thru a red light ?. Umm, no, I did ? Oh no I don't remember the light being red !
He smiled trying not to laugh. I said I know you! Your the Sargent now. & I said his name. He realized who I was. I asked if he knew Donnie died. He didn't & talked about him a minute. I asked if he wanted my license & reg. He didn't need it. Said I figured you didn't know I was following you. You take it easy driving. My mom was doing odd things after my dad died. Said his goodbyes, I got my ice coffee & didn't leave it.
There's so many things I've been going through that you talked about.
I best not forget to watch you this Saturday!!!! I've been knitting & get lost into it in my own little world !
A few weeks ago I ordered the $57 pivot course (I Def. Need it 😂) Do you have an idea when I should expect it ?
Thanks for all you do ❤
Oh my! I am glad the police have you some grace when he pulled you over, and that sounds very much like Widow Brain. As for the course, you should have had instant access!!! I will email you the information again on how to log in to access the course later today. I’m so sorry about that misunderstanding!
Nobody tells you what to expect and so much work to do when your brain is at its dippiest🤷🏻♀️🤪 probate, banking,tax wills house funeral computers your all alone it’s no wonder you feel if your brains taken a few weeks holiday. The tiredness overwhelms you. Ann Sheffield England
All true! Thanks for watching #widfam
It's been 2 years. Today is the 1st time I experienced brain fog àt a large scale.
I’m sorry #widfam
Pam from NY!
Thanks for watching.
Great stream today.
I came across a beautiful instrumental song by Jesse Cook called Broken Moon. It's very pretty and I encourage those interested to give it a listen.
Going on 4 yrs since my husband passed and dealing with a current partner who is in failing health and in the hospital.
He mentioned to me the other day he hoped I would find another love should he pass.
Heartbreaking to hear of course as the well of emotions raised.
I wrote the below after hearing the song Broken Moon .
likely many of us have had similar experiences.
Knowing although it will be very hard and take some time that there is a meaningful life possible after loss.
Each day provides us the opportunity to heal and grow in the form of clarity, grace and gratitude.
Broken Moon
Where now does your light shine?
A sliver of romance, a slice of memories a glow.
Young lovers dream and gaze upon you wishing the night to never end.
Others alone in your shadows cast beckon daylight to come.
Alas the sun rises sharing the sky momentarily as you set down.
Inky shadows in your silver light begin to fade giving way to the breaking of a new day.
Beautiful, thank you for sharing! #widfam
My Husband died in March 2019 & this widows brain or fog drives my up the wall.I thought I was going mad.Its been three years last month & its still with me.
Gail, I pray the weighted misty fog lightens and lifts for you. I remember walking through and with dealing the thick heavy grayness for some time myself.
It still comes back from time to time.
Journaling helped me like a compass to chart my progress and find the direction of true North. I had to recalculate and realign as necessary to stay on course. My soulful heart was broken, body and mind holistically weakened yet I was determined to find my strength, courage and way through the fog and out of the abyss.
Short, intermediate and long term goals and daily honey do lists for myself were all included in my daily process to keep on track. I still use those things today!
Prayers!
Hello from California
Hello, and thanks for watching! #widfam
We were married 40 years on 20 June last year. He was my soulmate
Prayers for you today! #widfam
Ah, weakened immune system… Explains why I got shingles 2 months after my husband died.
Could very well be!
Dolores from North Carolina
Thanks for watching! #widfam
Hello
Thanks for watching
Helloooooooo
France
Hello, thanks for watching! #widfam
Do you think men process different than women on this ?
I’m sure they do…but we are all humans and affected by these hormones in similar ways. My husband (also a widower) is definitely absent-minded, but I didn’t know him before his loss to know if that is different than he was before. I will have to ask him about this! #widfam
🌷
Thanks for watching #widfam
Perhaps you were experiencing menopause as well
It’s possible- I’m for sure in the middle of it now- having hot flashes about 10 times a day and about once an hour through every night!
research L-theanine
Thanks