Це відео не доступне.
Перепрошуємо.
5 Types of Dysfunctional Family Dynamics
Вставка
- Опубліковано 8 сер 2024
- We are family, I got all my dysfunctional members and me! Wait, that's not how the song goes! Here are 5 Types of Dysfunctional Family Dynamics.
References:
Ubaidi, B. (2017). Cost of Growing up in Dysfunctional Fmaily. Clin Med International Library,3(3). Retrieved June 27, 2018.
Ways To Support Us:
/ psych2gonow
Buy from our shop here:
www.introvertpalace.com/
Use the discount code: psych2go to get 10% off anything in the shop.
Sign up with our sponsored link for affordable online counselling:
betterhelp.com/Psych2Go
betterhelp.com/Psych2Go
Intro: Surey Camacho
Script: Catherine Huang
Voice Over: Lily Hu
Animator: Daniela Ramirez
Project Manager: Wendy Hu
Community Manager: Priscilla Cha, Nicole Pridemore
Producer: Psych2Go
Website: psych2go.net
Twitter: / psych2go
Facebook: / psych2go
Tumblr: psych2go.me
Patreon: / psych2gonow
Contact + editorial@psych2go.net
Even if your family is dysfunctional, you are important family to the Psych2Go community
Psych2Go why don't you guys create a another place where people can share their experiences and support each other? (i think it's a good idea since you guys want to create a supportive community..) like a discord server....
Psych2Go Can you do a video of disabled person's family? Like how to raise a disabled child?
Mine is 5 :/
Jesus Adrian Daniel Mercado I wish you good luck
Rein Chan might be worst i think, i know people whose lives in a dictature. Type 4
*when you thought your family was normal until you find out your family is most of these*
*Yep that's me*
I realized my family is one of these, after two hospitalizations in psychiatric clinic. I used to love them, doing almost everything they needed from me, and all I got is heavy depression, sociophobia, extreme anxiety, and getting rejected by everyone. God, sometimes I want to knife my psychopathic mother, who doesn’t even want treatment for herself, constantly lying me in a face that she “loves” me.
I sadly thought this too until a friend pointed out that was not normal in 5th grade.
Yea
I also believe my family is also most of these
The saddest thing is growing up thinking your family is normal
I know right this is the worst. Normalising this kind of behaviour is the most hazardous of them all.. I tell myself everyday this is not normal or not the way it should be or supposed to be
A parent is supposed to protect children and love him , but not comparing him to his\her siblings ...
Indeed
My earliest memory is that of my parents loudly arguing in the living room, while my 4-year-old self stands in the doorframe and watches without saying a word.....!
My parents arguing literally every day, my mother hitting me when I made her too angry, my father never or only rarely doing anything around the house......!
For the first few years of my life, I thought this was a common thing in every family.
But as I grew older, I was able to understand certain things better.
Like when seeing the families on TV, I noticed how much more peaceful and loving they were compared to my family........!
By the time I was about 9 years old, I knew my family wasn't normal.
And at such a young age, I actually WANTED my parents to finally split up! Because although I was never the sharpest tool in the shed, I knew that my parents could never make peace with each other!
And I knew that my father was the problem.
He never did anything for us!
Mostly, he would just sleep all day and play computer games or watch TV all night!
I never understood why my mother hadn't just left him already, but I hoped the day would come, where she would!
And when I was 11, it finally happened!
My mother moved to another city with me and my younger sister!
My dad is still a problem, but at least now we don't have to put up with him 24/7!
I'm 16 now and my family is still pretty screwed up, but now It's at least a little better than before!
@@Aruna_Shadows I’m so sorry... I thought my family had issues but in reality it’s not comparable to other people. I hope you’re family becomes better and you have my sympathy
It's really hard seeing people say good things about how my mom is really nice, but really they have no idea what my mom is like when it's at home.
I have the same problem...
Sounds like a NPD Parent to me check it out on google ;)
For me Its my Dad
@@acqspq2451 same my dad hates me and we never speak
My mom does that too
My dads house is emotionally detached and my mom makes me feel guilty for her emotions
I understand
Like mine
Exact same here
Just don't care
I understand that feeling, but please take care of yourself. You need attention too.
....My family is emotionally distant....
Eax3 Playz same
...
Eax3 Playz me too. I hope it gets better for you
Me too and I hope you luck with yours
Same
Watching this made me realise I have an emotionally distant family. I have so much trouble expressing myself, especially to my parents. I find it hard to tell them certain things, like I think I have social anxiety, but I don't have any courage to tell them that. I have low self esteem on how I look and of my academic skills, and I find it so hard to make new friends and hold conversations. I'd rather stay alone and quiet in my room all day. We never do anything as a family anymore. We dont even eat together at the table. I think because of this, i have anxiety when i eat in public or at tables with other people. My mum has always been very distant from me. We never hug, we never hold conversations, i never talk to her about anything, and she always got on my nerves throughout my childhood. She acts like a child. She was always right apparently. My mum doesn't care about what I do. There is no relationship. I still need to love her though, she is my mum after all
Sorry this comment is a mess i dont know how to express and articulate my thoughts.
Feebii this reminds me of my relation ship with my mom too....I feel you dude
I relate
Yo i hope you know that you're not the only one
Same, but i have an older sister and she is really close to my parents.
Me
Me: my family isn’t dysfunctional...
Psych2Go:I’m about to end this whole mans career
IM WHEEZING But I’m not a rapper
This brought humor to this comment section and I thank you
YEEEAAAH
Yes, it becomes so normal to us and we go to others and they say theres nothing wrong with it
@@ddot879 YEAH
Me: *General Anxiety*
Mom: *Bipolar disorder*
Dad: *Drug abuse*
Me: I mean yeah my family is pretty good..
Same I got asperger's my mums got bpd and my dad left like 10 years ago
Big same
Me: depression and anxiety
Dad: bipolar
Brother: autism
Mom: dead
It helps to know that all families go through it and that you’re not alone
Mom: Depressed and verbally abusive, has threatened to disown me if I ever did something bad i.e drugs, sex or bullying someone, which are things I'd never do but good to know she'd disown me. She's also an on/off alcoholic.
Dad: depressed and always getting abused, only talks to me when he wants me to hear about how shit my mom treats him or when he want's me to do chores.
My brother: also abusive and gets everything he wants and does everything my mom does, +hits me when he doesn't get his way, talks about how bad and useless I am with my parents.
Me: never talked to unless they want something or I have to eat dinner with them or watch a movie with them, hates affection because I'm not used to it, got abbused by my grandparents, likely has gender dysphoria but nobody believes me.
And I'm still only miraculloisly emotionally "ok I guess" and numb.
Mom: Bipolar Type 1 with traits of Borderline Personality Disorder
Brother: Overly Protective, Not that weird you think? Well think again cause (I'm 24)
Dad: Out of the picture
Me: Generalized Anxiety Disorder
You: If you want to talk about how shitty it is, DM me
@@charevandenheever4460 hey I come from a very unhealthy family and you are not safe. Please don't shrug off the terrible situation you are in. You will end up attracting these abusive types of people in other relationships if you just let life happen. There is help it's not going to be easy but the life your living on a day to day basis will lead you to drug abuse or some unhealthy form of escape if it goes unchecked.
I can 110% agree w/ no.1 & 4, I don't understand why parent(s)/guardian(s) think that using dictator mentalities would be the "answer to everything".
Ruby Vlogs same here
Its the only way they know to establish control -_- sorry you went through that. I had the emotionally distant and pathological household. Ive unsuccessfully raised my parents for the last 27 years. But i had my freedom for the most part at least.
Preach
Ruby Vlogs right because if this I was raised to not say no to adult with that meaning I would have problems saying no to other people In general I have an urge to give but when I receive I feel guilty and embarrassed
Samantha Cooksey Yeah but in the end, is it worth acting like a dictator? It's just makes things worse. Dealt w/ that numerous times.
This page is slowly healing me. I’m glad I can just type this. Frankly, I cry a lot when you guys hit home.
iForgotTbh !? Meee
Re birth
welcome to Health, friend!
It's a beautiful place 🌻☀️🏣
It gets better ❤
Psych2Go: They use fear as a tool.
Me:
My dad with the belt:
Belt is used by my mom in that case.
@@hannahrose2528 KNIVES????? WTF???????? WHAT????
@@hannahrose2528 OH FUCK! Sorry.
I am so sorry this is happening to you and I hope you find peace with time and trust me this won't last long it will pass... Just hold on a little bit longer sweety you will be in a better place
@@locus831 yeah
Me: 1, 2, 3, 4.... I had a very unusual life, I'm the oldest of 7, both parents did drugs, DCFS never took us away because parents knew how to work the system, sold food stamps for drugs, we were homeless alot, I took care of the younger kids all the time and worked jobs starting at 8 (paper route, then corn detasseling until I was of legal age to work)... All the while, I was on honor roll and getting straight A's. My mom wanted me to drop out in high school to take care of my siblings even more, I refused so she abandoned me.
I was homeless on my own, going to high school, working a job, living in a car
Anyways, fast forward to today and I'm half way through my masters degree. I'm in my mid-20's
I want to help other children who face what I faced
EDIT: I want to share as well that if you struggling, you aren't alone... Even if you don't "feel" like you can overcome it, you just have to believe you can. Finding a good therapist helps ;)
Wow I have sooo much respect for you for doing all this! You made the best choice for sure! I wish you and your siblings so much luck!
Sorry to hear that!! 😔 You are a survivor!!!
You are one of the most remarkable people I've ever seen! Congrats on being halfway through your masters degree! You are showing other people who may also be in your situation that they aren't screwed and they still have the power to change their life! Thank you, you are a blessing!
I almost cried reading your story 😞
Sounds like my family except I wasn't allowed to go to school.
Mine is a mixture of 1,4 and 5. I'm constantly tired, angry and discouraged to improve my situation. I think about dying all the time, but I don't do it because I don't wanna hurt myself more
Please, find someone you can talk about it. Your family is just a very little piece of the world. There's always a person you can reach out, you only have to give it a chance
O Universo Leitor I was seeing a psychologist close to school, specially cuz I got involved with a guy there who fucked me over bad....
Mine is mostly 1, 2, 4 and a little 5. If you wanna talk, I'm always up for. My Instagram is mykelasines
I feel exactly the same
You are not alone. My lover is still going through the same exact situation, and it is so hard. She is depressed but doesn't want to see any specialist. I send you all my support, since I do feel what it is like.
Im 35..seeing this confirmed my feelings, sad even as adults we can't be together
You're not alone. 30... Something and dealing with this kind of narcissistic parents. It's been hell.
Hope you are well and don't let they affect you anymore. Regards!
38 Couz. Family been broken for years. we can barely enjoy a meal together. started lighting fathers cigerets at 4, tasting alcohol @ 6, drunk with school principal grade 10😝 so fam and school life was wrecked. People wonder why I stay away from society
I've always been the scapegoat in my family.
same but I'm the only child of a single parent so defending my position does nothing but make matters worse
Me too. Thank god I don't live with them anymore. Living with my family and going to school was much harder than being an adult living separately and away with a job.
I don't talk to my brother, my dad never wanted to know about me and was psychologically abusive, and my mum is very selfish, manipulative and just didn't give a shit. I'm still in contact with my ma but I still blame her for never taking responsibility as a parent, as well as how she let my dad treat me (as well as how she never wanted to get involved with arguments between me and my brother or help any situations). Even to this day I'm more of a mother to her than she ever was to me.
When I was younger I was always suicidal. My brother was very controlling and always tried to get me in trouble for no reason. My dad always used to break my confidence with everything and anything.
I honestly hated family life. There were always arguments. I'm so happy I don't live with them and know I have the option of cutting my mum off at anytime since she's still very toxic.
ItIsFunnyDamnIt same, I have 5 brothers and there excuse is just “your the girl”
@@315katty wow i relate to everything you said. im so sorry for everything and am glad you separated yourself!
@@_Zto_ bruh parents/family do NOT realize that what they say is harmful and that sucks. its just another day for them but abused kids will ALWAYS remember. sending positivity!
You forgot the Cliche Gacha Life Family. This is where there is two parents and two children. The parents always favourite one child, spoil them, reward them for nothing, etc. and the other child is used as a servant. This is a 100% REALISTIC family and should be taken seriously. It happens a lot in the Gacha Life Dimension.
I understand that all too well
Ewww gacha cliche
Well this happens to be my family dynamic it was always my brother
UwU too true
I'm wondering if the gacha community will explain this.
My family is partly all 5, my father is insecure, cowardly, arrogant, selfish, passive, aloof, unintelligent, uneducated, mediocre, and alcoholic. My mother is bipolar, controlling, manipulative, overprotective, over-nurturing, submissive toward my father, often depressed, and overly emotional. This is possibly the worst combination to raise a boy. My two older sisters are exactly the same as each of my parents. They are each the polar opposite of each other which causes constant arguing and tension. I've been to seven different schools in less than nine years because of my father's stupid choices. I became isolated, depressed, and eventually developed social anxiety. I repressed all my feelings all these years and now it's eating me alive. The worst part is that they think my mental problems aren't justified, that as long as I was physically healthy I have nothing to complain about. They don't understand how their actions effected us and still won't acknowledge that they were wrong. My family is toxic and I need to get away from them in order to rebuild my life.
That sounds exactly like what i went through,. Eerily so. Up to every single detail. From being a toddler to a teenager, i'm still feeling the afteraffects in my twenties. Not to mention that constantly being the new kid increases your chances of getting bullied, making your only escape from your family also hell. It's a complete disaster, it has left me an empty shell and i don't see myself anywhere close to getting out of my depression as it even deteriorated my physical health, but good luck to yours, i feel you.
Dude. .....
Ha ha take the L
Damn, I feel the same way towards my family. I honestly can't wait to move out
Fox Smith call child support or the police
its so scary that my family related to more than one of these
Same- my family before the divorce was 4. And 5.
The dominant and emotional. I've grown up experiencing those all and still my anger hasn't subside towards them. They say I don't understand them but the truth is it's them who can't.
1= Yes
2= Yes
3= Yes
4= Yes
5= Yes
Oof... I fell sorry for you
Liar. It is not possible to be all of these.
@@OtakuQueenMMD you underestimate these things
1=yep
2=nop
3=nop
4=nop
5=yep
1 yes
2 yes
3 nope
4 yes
5 kinda
4 is exactly my family and it's unbelievably accurate.
Same here
Same
* same.
Unnamed Visitor same
All of them where true but 4 was the most realistic
My dad was an abusive alcoholic, he always fight with my mum and hit her and then he hit me and my siblings too.
Emo bands Are life of me 2 but different story
I've been watching these videos lately, trying desperately to figure out my life. I'm really bad at explaining my feelings, and everything in general. So I'm using these as a way to figure out what's actually wrong with me, because I'm unable to actually talk to anyone. So, thank you.
Yo so it’s been 4 years, how are ya feeling? Did things get any better?
My family sucked so I disowned them mostly, winning!
I wish I can do that to my own they are shit😂
Great! As you should. And you don't need to go back. The past is in the past
It just hit me..... My family is emotianally distant. Even the effect is accurate. I'm 12 and I hide my emotions. Also, I can't remember my parents ever really showing me any emotional warmth. Wow.......
Same. I mean they hug me and say they love me but most of the time they just leave me alone
Lumie me too but I’m 11. My dad shows slight warmth but....well let’s just say my little brother is the favorite
I'm 11 and going thru the same thing good luck
I felt much of the same when I was growing up. If you take mental notes of what not to do when your a grown up, I PROMISE it will be better. Hang in there!
Same sister..can I be your friend..so we can RELATE?
Me: **Watches this video**
My Family: **Has incredibly minor fight**
Me: *F* *A* *C* *K*
Love you
JustAnotherPerson, ROFLOL!!!
I grew up in a household where my parents both argue almost everyday, imagine what it did to us children for many years. My dad would scold us a lot, just to relieve his stress from other things. When i had small fights with my siblings when we were younger, my father would always sode with my other siblings, and wanted me to take the long road always as i am the older child, and must bear all my younger siblings wrongs and must not be mad at them.
The thing that what i hate the most is that my father talks about things like forgiving, doing good deeds to other people, love your family and etc. But he rarely does that.. sad to say that he likes(or rather loves) to give advice to people about their problems, but he doesnt really do it in his life. Most of the time he talks bad things about people behind their back, one of the sad things is that he lets my mom, me and my younger siblings hear him, he want to relieve his anger, but doesnt know what other might feel when he does that. I feel very irritated hearing his rants about other people when he doesnt even hear what his children and his wife feel. I think that he is self centered, narcissistic, plastic, hard headed, and bossy. My grandmother told me stories when where he was still young, he never really got on his fathers good side, he didnt get along well with his brothers and sisters, he didnt finish college(and highschool if i remember correctly), and ran away from home at a young age.. He didnt really had the best childhood either, and it makes me sad that he wants me to feel that way also, going back in my memories of when i was still a child, most of what i remember are bad experiences, mostly the times where he hits on us, curse us, and belittle us because we didnt exceed or pass his expectations.
The same memories goes with my memories with my mother, but i thanked god that she didnt do so much as what my father did to use. She loves my father very much, i can say that i feel that she loves my father a bit more than her children. Its sad to say that most of the time when my father is overabusings me and my siblings psychologically, emotionally, and physically, she only watches and most of the time doesnt help us. I feel that she is also scared of my father, so she sides with him because she knows that my father will only be mad at her if she did not take his side too. The sad thing is that i feel that she inly does that is because deep down she doesnt want my father to leave her, do that our family will still be intact. She bears and accepts my fathers flaws and imperfections, but sad to say my father doesnt feel the same way for my mother.
Its so sad that until this day i still have a scar, because of what my father did, he still continues to do more damage and scars on me, its kind of sad that he doesnt show remorse or guilt of what hes done. Im sure he knows it but he prides himself not to open up and has the guts to say "sorry" sincerely i guess. He says "sorry", but i dont feel any sincerity at all. In the past years ive known my father, i already memorized his patterns, i know when he feels irritated (so i get out of his way), and i know when he really feels sincerely sorry for what he did bad. Its just sad that he doesnt even feel that when he knows that i have depression right now.
The pathological household..... I grew up taking care of my parents and hardly going to school or anywhere else
My parents are constantly fighting. My dad is a drinker and he is obsessed with winning the lottery. My mom is overprotective and controlling and she is also verbally/emotional abusive to me. She criticizes me and puts me down all the time.
So sorry you have to deal with that. My family was the same, so I know how you feel.
I hope you have other family member that look after you, the one have your back like sibling or grand parents if you don't have that i suggest to move out soon as possible try get school/job outside your town and be financially independents so you only deal with them once a year
+Fadel Rama Thank you for the advice. College is my only escape from my parents.
+LittleLulubee No child should ever have to go through this. I hope that you're okay :)
Night Sky stay strong i wish the same for my child cant wait for him to be 17 or 18.
Mine is a mix between 1 and 5
same feels bad.
Same but my parents are also divorced, and all of it is affecting my little brother who won’t talk to anyone other than family anymore.
same
Same
oh same...
Welp, looks like I have the dominant-submissive household. When I was younger, I thought that having a really mean parent that you can't talk to without being yelled at was normal. After a while, I realized that many kids had parents that were super nice and supportive. And this video helped me understand why I feel this way about my family, so thank you. I've always hated coming back home from school since school was kinda the place where I could finally escape from all of the things I have to deal with at home. But now I have to stay at home everyday 24/7 because of quarantine, and I just really hate it. I'm to the point where trying to fix my family is meaningless to me. Because I really just don't want anything to do with them. So talking to my school counselor about it wouldn't really help me that much, so it's pretty much just hopeless. I really wish that I could just be put up for adoption so that I could get away from them. Does anyone else feel this way? Please reply because I want to know. Okay, thank you for taking time to read this. You're beautiful and you deserve love! :)
I also want to go away from my family
I had the same life, hated coming home.
I lived in the same kind of family but with a little dash of all of the rest of these types of families. My dad was a drunk and usually passed out on the couch. I remember that when he would start to wake up or start talking in his coma I would get scared and do my best to get away as fast as I could otherwise I would end up in an argument that I had no idea what it was about and I usually would end up being screamed at for some reason. I could tell lots of stories as I'm sure everyone here can.
I don't really have any friends anymore because I just don't have the energy to be bothered anymore. I had one long term common law relationship for about 8 years but that was almost 25 years ago. I don't know how to handle friendships or girlfriends so I don't bother.
Mom: **hurts me emotionally several times**
Dad: **was great but passed away**
Me: yep not dysfunctional at all
Edit: Oh my god all of you sound like you need hugs are yall ok??
I do relate. I hope you don't feel alone❤
My dad died on new years eve , hit by a drunk driver...I was 6 my world crumbled. My mom a me me me me the world revolved around her and my older sister.Then enter Grandma straight out of the book flowers in the attic..I had no respect for mom, but my grandma scared the hell out of me physical and emotionally damage daily..I was the spitting image and I spoke my mind just like my dad and she hated my dad...I stopped speaking and I showed no emotion good or bad .it didnt help then I was stupid ugly fat mentally slow. If I was good at something I was not allowed to do it anymore. soccer as soon as I enjoyed it I was removed volleyball drama.anything.
@@kellie4792 Hugs =(
Lovelii Thr33 The E-Clown my dad passed too I feel if he was here my family would be fine not just him but my 3 siblings past and my Nan who I loved the most died and my dads mom and is family doesn’t even care of my existence
Omg this happened to me to. My mom picks fights with me and my sister for literally no reason, and punishes us severely and unfairly for things that shouldn't be punishable anyways.
1,5. My dear mother never showed me much attention and when she did it was for me doing something wrong so she yelled st me, from which I got scared, anxious and stressed and so I started to shake, than cry and every time I just tried to tell my self that I'm okay and that I belong... Somewhere. I don't really feel loved by anyone and the worse I feel very bad because I don't feel like I love anyone. I no longer feel like I know what love feels like... G thank mom...
I can totally sympathize. Very similar experiences. I was never praised, only criticized. Never shown any affection, only yelling and screaming at everything I didn't do...like that one small unnoticeable thing on my enormous chore list. It's just an awful lot in life, and I wish I could understand how this will help me become a better person on the other side. One good thing though, is that now that I have my little children I don't ever take them for granted and always hug them, kiss them and praise them. I basically do exactly the opposite of what we went through and it seems to be doing great. Ah yes, I seriously just hate my mom. It's awful to even say it, but it's the truth. I'm sorry your dealing with this heartache!
well first thing is first, love your self, you do belong to this wide universe, there is a lot of systems in your body so go learn about them and appreciate your body, you sleep and dream and feel and think ( all kindes of good and bad thoughts ), there is a lot in you so know it and love it first, then lifes becomes more clear.
Thats me
I am Matt you literally just discribed my life right now
I am Matt my parents use to treat me with emotional warmth and praise when i was little. but as i got older i just seemed like more and more of a disappointment. i am 12 and my mom has already told me she doesn’t like me three times. my eleventh birthday was spent being yelled the whole day then locking the door and crying till i got too tired to cry. now my whole family hates me and thinks i’m some mustache twirling villain. ( my mom makes sure everyone thinks that ). my mom says she loves me with all her heart but i don’t believe her. she doesn’t treat me like it. and my mom does stuff for me but i can never confide to my mom and talk about how i feel. my step dad doesn’t care about this situation. he only cares about how to pay the bills and keep a roof over our head and food to eat. i respect that. but he still took my dad away from me. anyway my family doesn’t like me but i love them. i think they love me but don’t like me? idk. this was supposed to be a short comment but idk man, this is the first time i’ve really talked about how i feel in such a long time.
I guess I am a bit more fortunate, but I am still struggling with so much mentally...
I had anxiety and an awesome family. I think having a horrible familly and less mental health problems is worse
sym thank you so much, it really does mean a lot to me :)
Liz xD at least you got over the anxiety (from the past tense that is used) I find that it would be worse to have a lot of mental problems and a horrible family, it will only solidify your problems and send you deeper into the seemingly endless pit of suffering.
Keep fighting! It's certainly not easy and we don't know what's exactly going on with you, but being subbed to this channel helps a lot.
Sending you love 💗💗 you can push though 😊😊
The saddest part is, is that all of these scenarios can apply to one family all at once...
Conflict of interest/change is tearing me apart inside. (more ways than one). Things are fragile and when change them. cause ripple effect to everyone. especially I who needs support. Now where I feel FEARFUL to say anything. cause of fear of what may cause. cause everything is being passed on/monitored/''censored'' by Smarty Pants (older brother of the ''chair''). Ive been in vulnerable spot for ages and should have known better than to pull it apart. I feel like now I can no longer breathe or be me. cause everything is set up in a way where they are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and I wrong. and If I have something to say about it then I who gets affected. acid reflux/splashback in return. I thought function/purpose of family was supposed to be best interest of individuals in family. apparently I son have LEAST priority. Fucking hate this family.. all my gutssssss. feel backstabbed/betrayed absolutely. literally bloodhounds the lot of them, I now must live in FEAR toxic atmosphere. where can't even such breathe/say a word. cause know it will swing back into my FACE. like a KICK-boot on rollercoaster doing loop, where it SWINGS BACK ON LOOP into my face). but where I must now admit to having such thoughts in first place (also causing me detriment). I can't tell my parent cause act in itself would be conflict of itnerest (where be like why do you care/what are you hiding?), its meanest bullying thing in history. (but they wouldn't care cause their IMMUNE with POWER and blood). I can't BREATHE no LONGER. or be myself.
Psych2Go: What type of dysfunctional family dynamic do you resonate with most?
Me: all of the above
My dad is basically the dictator at my house. He's also manipulative and was physically abusive. Even to this day he refuses to swallow his pride and apologize. He either denies that it happened or say we were bad kids.
My mom didn't do anything when he hurts my siblings and I, even when we were right next to her. She does provide us with the our needs except one important one: love. Long story short, she's not a very loving person. It also doesn't help that my dad does all he can to make sure she doesn't leave him.
The majority of my family members are bad people too. The ones I get along with are my siblings. Trust me, if we told the cops about him no one would have believed us since we were kids. I hate my life and I can't wait till I move out.
That's horrible, I hope you can move out soon and heal
LittleLulubee Thanks, I hope so too.
My mom was the manipulative dictator, and my dad went along with her. She also refuses to take any responsibility for the harm she caused, and blames me. When an abuser denies the abuse, that's just another form of abuse. Take care and look forward to the future 🌸
LittleLulubee Thanks and I hope you heal as well.
Thanks
Im the scapegoat because I actually use my free will for myself. Not a people pleaser.
I live for myself and is punished for it.
Hello but my type of scapegoat is the one who is blamed for basically everything Center of my rage and they act like they were right if i had a gun and some ammo for everytime this happens people would think i stole from the army
@Billy Bob i feel your pain they dress you up as the enemy and you get attacked well if another would join its gonna cause a chain reaction and the scapegoat is the one who dies while the "Hero" gets the praise its like a Murder mystery and they think its the innocent but the murderer was framing them
Fellow scapegoats, if you are interested watch videos about narcissism, covert narcissists, overt narcissists, narcissistic abuse, gaslighting etc ...
Elder sibling, awesome academic performance, always taught to "behave", yet still the scapegoat and the emotional cushion of mum. No consideration that her freaking narcissistic behaviour is draining the life out of me.
Now I'm not jealous in that I hate my younger sibling, but she gets her way around...she knows how to sweet talk and cajole mum. Mum always chooses her over me and finds every opportunity to compare and show me how despicable I am.
Not to tell, dad's the same but the more logical, authoritative one.
Extended family's full of drama. I'm living in a circus. 👍🏽
Tee Noush
I’m sorry:(
The saddest part of my life is just,I grew up with a dysfunctional family and I've never know that because my family is POSITIVELY LOOKING NORMAL ASF
My family is Chronic conflict. I have 14 now and all my life i thought that kicking, spank with hooks, bell, chairs, throw hard things, call me stupid, useless to me and my brothers were the normal things that a family do with their childrens.
and it hurts a lot
When my mom do all of these, it hurted like hell and I was always crying but now I fell nothing
I thought that if I throw up my feelings and practice to not to fell pain, It would hurt less
and it works.
Know what? All my friends, think that I live in a perfect family because I'm always with a smile in my school and laughing at everything but it's hard to keep the mask.
I dont want my family please
That last one hit me in the heart 😔
Right☹
Oh I'm not the only one *YAY*
Your not alone my dude 😔
Same
Yeah, me and my siblings will live the same house for 72 hours without even talking to each other. It’s like strangers living and the same roof. I’d blame my anxiety and depression for it
Whoops! At 1:56 you say "chronic" when it should be "chaotic." Just wanted to let you know. I love all of your videos, they've gotten me through some tough times and I'm sure they'll only continue to do so.
Aceris Thanks! You are very observant :)
Aceris yeah I caught that as well
Psych2Go - at the beginning the written card states “5 types of dysfunctiononal family dynamics” - extra two letters. You guys are great and I love your videos.
Congrats to us
This makes me feel better about my family.
HOW?!
I'm always the scapegoat of the family and my dad always makes me feel like I'm not good enough for him and yells at me I tell him I will try to change but he started makes me feel like I'm not good enough my step family are often loved more than me and my sis it's really hard to deal with but thankfully my mom is so much better of a person and actually cares about our feelings
Five dysfunctional families:
1. Chronic Conflict
2. Pathological
3. Chaotic
4. Dominate-Submissive
5. Emotionally Distant
Watch video for explanation.
Im the Dominate Submissive
Sadly..pathological...
chronic conflict :(
Im 3 and 5 :'(
1 & 4
My shitty family is a mix between 1,3 and 4. It’s mainly 1,since there’s constant arguing. It sucks to live like this and I’ve been trying to restore peace for years at this point.
Smol Lillith We hope things get better soon!
Smol Lillith You will get trough this! You are strong and By the way, I really like your profile picture :)
Oh I feel you my family is dysfunctional in everyway except the maids did everything which I’m very lucky to have them
You can't restore peace because they probably not listen to you. Try to have peace yourself. I can't save someone who not want to be saved. It's hard, but you have to try.
Smol Lillith for me it’s practically everything.
I don't think there is a perfect family
A perfect family is a family that adknowledges what mistakes they do
It’s perfect if everybody accepts everyone with every flaw they have. But this includes knowing yourself. And when your parents don’t know their own selves, how should you?
Well there's definitely one better than my family. My dad always scared me, never contacts me, my brother used to treat me like shit and never contacted or contacts to me to this date and my mum is selfish and manipulative. Home life was terrible when I was younger. Never fucking again. I could go on and on about how fucking awful that life used to be. Thank god I somehow made it to adulthood and live away. I stay in contact with my ma but Im thinking of cutting her off because she's still so toxic.
True, but there are better and worse families.
And they dont give a shit
*when u suffer with chaotic & emotionally distant family*
Me: ahaha-
Me: aha..
Also me: *sliently sobs*
aha omg same bro, hey, i jst remmebr i dont have friends cuz i have been genuinly weird my entire life, im always rejected because of it......
@@weirddiary6456 i was just known as the annoying yet quiet kid so i didnt really have many
my friends would talk behind my back & id slowly get replaced as time went on
i probably should've seen that coming
The last one Is my Family 100%. Because of that i have a really low self esteem and it isnt easy for me to Connect with other people.
Same. I have very little confidence in myself and my decision making. It’s extremely difficult for me to make friends. I keep to myself and don’t ask anyone for help.
Sara Alice you are the first Person I can relate very much 🌼 I wish you All the best
Newt sein Niffler
Mine is also 100% number 5. With no communication. Because of the lack communication and stuff my mum 'doesnt really wanna talk about', my parents are divorcing. But since we had no bondigs what so ever, through lack of communication, I feel like it really doesn't bodder me all that much. I deal with my problems on my own. I chose my highschool (although i probably messed up that choice, but at least I can say that I made that decision so yeah, I will deal with it as well), I have dealt with huge lows of in life on my own, which i cant really call depression, but I was suicidal, it was temporary...
ANYWAYS
There are pros, for me at least, to this sorow situation as well: I dont need anybody, i am independent, i can see when I am wrong and I take responsibility.
And I think I will never have kids or be in a relationship (luckly i am an introvert) because 50% of all marriages fail. I am not taking those chances. I dont want my kids to go through this same thing.
We will see. I can never know, but i think theres a high possibility of me being single for the rest of my life.
But yeah, what it feels like to me, doesnt have to be the same for you. I cant even imagine how different we are. I hope you cant take any advice from this, because you really shouldnt. I dont wanna give you bad advice. What works for me, isnt necessarly going to work for you. I think we all gotta work it out on our own.
THANK GOD I AM AN INTROVERT THO. HURRAY! Allone 4ever.
Coze Thank you so much for your comment and your point of view! I am really happy for you because you've gone through so many bad Things All alone! I mean wow! That's really amazing in my view. And I didn't know that the Chance for a Marriage to break is 50%, that's really sad. :( I also don't want to have kids or marry a man/girl, so I think we are not that different :D I know this Sound strange, maybe because I am a totally Stranger to you but I really hope with the tear of my heart that you find a Partner in your life. I mean being alone is sometimes really great but I don't hope for you being alone for the Rest of your life, even though you are a introvert. For me you represent a wonderful and nice Person that's very strong, have a lovely day/live! 😊
Newt sein Niffler
Thank You very much for Your kind words and wishes!
I have read that in the US the chance for a divorce is from 40 to 50 percent. In other places its even higher, sadly. Like in Spain, Portugal, Luxembourg, the Czech Republic, and Hungary, they are even worse off with divorce rates higher than 60%. Belgium has the highest rate of divorce, I think. With like 70%.
But on the bright side, there are contries with extremly low divorce rates, like Montenegro 15%, Serbia 25%, Croatia 30% and so on.
It really depends where you live.
About the relationship part, if I happen to stumble up on somebody thats really amaizing, I might consider spending the rest of my life with them. But I dont really meet that many people so i dont know.
By the way, I would like to ask you, if you dont mind of course, are you bisexual? I concluded that based on you saying 'man/girl'. I hope you are not offended by that question. Anyway, if you are bi, do you have trouble with your family with that? Cause that would definitely suck :/
Have a great day too!
all of them, my family is basically all of them except from 2 and 3, but that's fine i locked myself in my room years ago and i am never coming out : )
So you specifically ask a delivery man to deliver food at your room so you don't starve?
Potato Lover Uber eats
I feel ya...I can't connect with anyone except my sister.all other "family" members are mean as hell with my mom being the most irritating one 😢😢😢😢never understood me not my siblings,always compared with other children and made our life hell..and since dad's death she thought she could control everything and that she does.thanks to her brother as well
farah Bnk me too! My dad literally asks if here are still children living in the house
I've dealt with all at some point. The one that has bothered me the most is the emotionally distant especially after my daddy died. None of my family asked me how I was doing the day of of after. I stayed in an abusive relationship bc of the lack of support until God reminded me how much I'm loved by him. I'm still healing but I'm grateful for others who get it
My family was mixture of dysfunctional and chaotic family type. I begin to exhibit the sings of generalised anxiety disorder at 14 years old but no one payed attention. This led me to the spiral of additions and up to this day it’s hard for me to create and maintain relationships due to the disorganised attachment style. It’s the living hell on earth and nobody understands it.
I’m hesitant to post this because I don’t know which ones really describe my situation, so I guess I’ll just say it and see.
Before my parents divorced in 2009, my mom had really bad depression and my dad took care of me and the house while working. They argued a lot, but not when I was in the room. After they divorced, me and my mom struggled with homelessness for a few years. She didn’t go out with her friends and she didn’t take me out anywhere either. When we did get a car, she would (out of the kindness of her heart) pick up people and drive them places. After she died, I’m talking the day after I buried her, my dad got the idea from my mom’s brother and sister-in-law, step-father, and his own bright brain of his to take me from the home I knew was going to be my home. For a week, I was yelled and cussed at, ignored by the man who brought me to his house, and tried to be talked out of living with my aunt by my grandmother and aunt. Finally, I was able to be back with my aunt, but it went downhill from there. She expected me to clean the whole house while she sat on her ass and did nothing. I flat-out refused because I didn’t know how to do anything. My mom had never taught me how to clean a house before. When we moved to where we are now, it threw my aunt’s son in the mix and her daughter and two grandchildren are staying with us right now. My Uncle (as I call my aunt’s son) works 5 days a week, 11am-8pm. She will sit on her ass all day or stay in bed all day and expect all of us to keep the house spotless. I get it, she has ptsd, depression, multiple personality disorder, and something else. She doesn’t acknowledge the fact that I have ptsd, panic and anxiety disorder, severe clinical depression, and the fact that I might have dissociative identity disorder or even add! She refuses to say, “okay, you have these mental illnesses. Your meds can help you, but you need to cope yourself. Here’s how I’ve done it.”. Never! On top of that, when she does get out of bed, she tells her son that none of us have done anything in the house when we have! I’ve spent two hours after an argument where my uncle raised his voice to yelling crying in my bedroom and wanting to die as I could see and hear my dad yelling and cussing at me the first night I was at his house. Neither of them care if I’m depressed or my anxiety is through the roof! I asked, as calm as I could be through tears, if I could go calm down before I had an anxiety attack, and I was refused! The only time I managed to get away, they started yelling at me! My aunt’s daughter tried her best to defend us, especially me. The argument started because, according to my aunt, “Everyone was making jokes about what she was trying to say and ignored her”. I tried to say that I was just making a drink for myself, and my uncle and Aunt both say that I was in on it too! I’m not able to take much more of this, so when my aunt’s daughter (who I also call my aunt) moves out, I’m going with them. Through it all, she’s seen what they do to me. That day, I spent hours trying to calm down my anxiety and suicidal thoughts because of that one argument. I’m forced to stand and obey when all I want to do is speak out about how my aunt doesn’t do anything in the house, so she can’t act like she does! She’s even threatened to hit me on more than one occasion! I’m 18, so I can’t do anything about it, but I’d like to see her hit me. I’d be out of the house in a heartbeat and I wouldn’t go back after getting my shit. Also, sorry for the swearing, I get heated talking about my home life. I don’t know if my current situation would be considered abusive or not, but it feels emotionally, mentally, and verbally abusive to me. I don’t know, I just wanna get out of here. College and a new house couldn’t be here faster.
Rachel Dean i feel really sorry! Sending hugs your way and I hope you can make it out of this real fast.
Dashaa F. Thanks, that means a lot. It’ll get better soon, I have a feeling!
What a poor person you
I have a similarly shitty situation. And I understand. I feel like unless I take responsibility for my life and live at my own place that I payed for I will never be free from all these horrible chronically idiotic elders that I know as my family
All of them are idiots fuck them all I'm moving out to live in a fucking toilet and not them
I don't care
You gotta believe what you wanna achieve. Or else it won't happen
You have to actually fully believe it's gonna happen
I really hope things will work out for you I really do
So my family falls in with a mix of the first and last one, and a little bit of the dominant-submissive. Everything time you go in there house it's akward and tension inducing. And now that I'm on my own I can't build relationships outside of work.
the chaotic household is my one, and im the older sibling ;-;
also the emotionally distant family
During my parents' separation, I was definitely #3
Parents constantly either fighting or too much in their bubble (ex: isolating themselves in different rooms, not paying much attention to us unless we did a mistake, etc.).
Me, a 16 year old, having to take care of my little sisters. One who has autism and the other one has ADHD and wouldn't give two shits when I would have to tell her what to do (clean up her room, prepare to go to bed, etc.). My parents also kind of used me as a punching bag.
Meanwhile, I also had my final exams coming up and had difficulties in a few classes.
Number 4 for me...I grew up with a father who had the last word at everything. My mum didn't have the courage or knowledge to step up to him. My family history still haunts me. It's so hard to not be like my parents, to fight against my legacy.
Wish you all love and strength to pull through.
Hello! Can you make video about cultural psychology? Using the definitions in the video, in some non-Western culture such as Chinese culture, dysfunctional families are extremely common, to the extent that many people within the culture don't find them problematic. Yet that does not mean children are not harmed by them (some forms of child abuse are social norms in China). So how does negative experience affect people with different cultural backgrounds? Does it impact people differently?
Catherine Ma Thanks so much for requesting this. I grew up with a strong Korean culture, which family dysfunction is also common and socially acceptable. I can’t speak for everyone of course, but though I’m the only one willing to call the abuse out for what it was/is, I can tell it very deeply affected the rest of the family. They just explain it away, deny it, blame it on “outsiders”, or just tell themselves it’s normal. Needless to say, I’m pretty distant from my Korean heritage.
Wouldn't that run into the problem of that information being racist? Like I've seen enough hate towards the western cultures that I won't be surprised if not a lot of researchers want to be mobbed by SJW people for thinking wrong or even thinking that people of color is perfect and nothing needs to change about them.
Man, my negative outlook is pretty bad.. 0-0
Ryoma Ashikaga I can see how that could happen; it’s realistic to think about, however negative.
I’d argue that here we are talking about cultural problems within the family. It’s not an attack on the family; it’s pointing out the flaws and very serious issues that can arise from family culture. Bringing more awareness to these issues presents the potential of it being prevented in future families, potentially making the world a better place. ❤️
All cultures, no matter where it’s from, can use improvement. If people want to cry racism on bringing awareness to toxic patterns within a culture that happens to come from another part of the world, then they are (if unwittingly) perpetuating the problem by joining those voices within that culture gaslighting and blaming victims like me and others who have suffered under that abuse. Simple as that.
Walphish that is really well said, thanks, you gave me something to think about through the day
The more I watch your videos the more I know about myself... that's what I was looking for a long time... thank you soo much...
My mother keeps bossing me around and i hate it it breaks my heart.And i'm scared of her now...
Watching this made me release that my family is the Chaotic family.
My mum just doesn’t care anymore and fails to understand how everyone works to make a system that suits us all.
Being the oldest one, I’m constantly taking on roles. Cleaning, cooking, trying to stop my siblings from fighting, etc.
I am so worried more for my little siblings. They don’t listen to anyone, cannot focus on school work, and just scream whenever someone tries to tell them off. How do I help? My mum doesn’t care about them enough to do anything and I feel like I’m the one that has too.
Aqua Is In Space ha ha ha take the L
U got to tell her straight.
My mother is chaotic but I grew up with my authoritarian grandparents. Authoritarian is not good but even as an adult my mother's chaos and lack of boundaries is intolerable. One of my sisters who stayed with my mom acted just like you. She did dishes, paid bills, changed baby diapers before she went to school in the morning. As she's older she's the perpetual caretaker. She still takes care of my mom it's like she thinks my mother is mentally deficient. I respect my mother enough to actually get angry and confront her. You should risk confronting your mom or if that's a bad idea then please ask for help from a real adult. I don't know who I'd be without my grandparents. In your case it could be a teacher or neighbor but please ask for help. You deserve help.
Aqua Is In Space :( yep. Sounds like my situation currently. Why the fuck aren’t parents aware of this shit and see it as normal. Years fucking later I deal with sever depression and anxiety and absolutely the avoidant type when it comes to everything. And couple years ago was when I finally moved out and started resenting them even more for not being the supportive parents they could’ve been all my life.
I’m in a chaotic family to
I grew up in a bad environment. Always in the ghetto with 5 other siblings and we all had different dads. Growing up was mostly my mom looking for love and letting her boyfriends or husbands treat us like garbage. I could never come to my mother about anything with out being made out to be whiney. I shut myself off for most of my child hood. I developed depression and low self-esteem. By time I started high school I was completely silent and closed off from people. I almost committed suicide twice. I dated people that where plain losers because I felt like no good person would love me. Eventually I did meet someone who helped me turn my life around. He was the only person I could tell everything too and I felt better about myself then I ever have. But, I still deal with my depression and have dreams of being trapped in my childhood home again. I hope one day I can be over depression and anxiety. And I can live like a normal calm person who goes with the flow.
I’m so sorry to hear that. It’s good that there is someone turning things around. Sense you had the energy to right this large paragraph, I know you’re a hard working person. You shouldn’t commit suicide, you have so much of your life left, things could get better.
I think I speak for us all when I say that I'm so glad you didn't commit suicide. I'm so glad you found someone who loves you and whom you love like that. We're all here to support you.
I can totally relate to you. I'm happy you didn't commit suicide. I'm also coming from the same type of family and I'm in the same position right now, and it's to the point where I'm thinking about talking to my Mom, but it's complicated. Her boyfriend wouldn't even treat us very well, but my Mom had kids with him and so I fear that if I don't do anything, I'm being submissive.
😮😮😮😮Something inside you, despite what has happened in your life, kept you from taking your life, take that opportunity to live well. Find out what that means to you. Thank the universe for sending someone to help pull you up. Now keep putting one foot in front of the other, bettering you, if you don't ,🙄🙄you already know the alternative. 🤔🤔🤔🤔
My family shows elements of all?
My step dads an addict to drugs which are medically given to him and he also is addicted to illegal drugs.
My ma's the one in control, and when things don't go her way, she guilt trips everyone. She thinks she knows the family but when it comes down to things such as me being transgender, she hardly understands that at all. She ways really emotionally abusive stuff without realising that its abusive. She has the most control over me, because she has the power to send me back to areas of my life that were traumatic for me.
We have no system. That really fucks with my autism and OCD- but nobody seems to care and I've just learnt to ignore the urge to do things like binge clean.
There's been so many elements that have made me feel unsafe at "home". I've ran away more times than I can count. I know we're dysfunctional. The foundations were broken way before my sister was born.
My step dad emotionally abuses us all. But we cant leave him because we don't have the money. They're just two exes who hate each other who have been forced to live together. He's also got his family against us. He makes my gran hate ma bc she wont clean and stuff like that. But he's making his family hate me because he won't invite me to events such as birthday parties so it makes it seem like I don't give a shit that he's the only technical dad figure I've had (his family also hate me bc I'm trans and gay but lmao I guess)
Its just annoying? There's a constant bad air to my "home" and you just always expect an argument.
I just cant wait to be old enough to move out. I cant deal with pretending that we function as a family, becoming a circus act whenever people are around.
man
I felt that. Truly, I did. My family shows elements of all too. Sending “cyber hugs” and positive healing vibes your way. ❤️
Chronic conflict family mixed with emotion disabled family
I wish your videos had Chinese subtitles :( I struggle to explain how my parents behavior is toxic and how it shaped our lives. My dad is a pretty difficult person and he is emotionally distant. My mom on the other hand is too emotional, overprotective and controlling. She always put us down (especially my younger sister) and compared us to other children. I confronted her many times about this and she says it is the Chinese culture, she refuses to listen to me because it is not my place to teach her this stuff. Yes I believe and know they love us but they don't see how the dynamics between them affected us - they fight a lot about useless shit. My mom used to threaten with divorce at every argument and she doesn't realize the stress she put us in. As the oldest child I always had and have to take care of our family, at 10 years old I was already thinking ahead about the situation if they actually divorced (who would be living where and with who etc). I feel I never had the chance to have an actual childhood since I was tasked with so many responsibilities at a young age. Now I am dealing with depression and anxiety for almost 5 years but the most heartbreaking experience was finding out my younger sister was suffering all this time and did self harm and I never noticed it. Luckily we grew closer after talking about it but sometimes I feel like a parent to my younger siblings AND my own parents
Superpandaaaa woah there, my mother is a korean and im experiencing the exact same things. She used to threaten us about how she should leave or scream about how stupid she was on marrying my father and having me it hurts beyond belief a lot of times. Its gotten really bad these days and my father talks such bad things of my mom and im the one recieving all this...im just scared and depressed at this point.
Same. Chinese too
I’m Chinese as well and I can relate to most of the things you said. I don’t feel close to any of my parents like I’m emotionally distant from my dad as well and my mom wants to be emotionally close to me but o don’t want to because o have no trust in either of them for all the time shat they have broken it for “the greater good”
@@lemonwillow i'm not chinese but it's sad to say this...
it seems like if it was actual chinese culture
@@dumbpablo5755 haha yeah :")
My mom is a good mom (her boyfriend is a little over controlling, but that doesn't affect me) and hearing all of those negative comments are very sad in a sympathetic way.
I feel so bad for the one's who are struggling. Just stay strong no matter what.
Matt 'Caster
You are right
I can relate to many of the previous comments. I survived a dysfunctional family. It was beyond horrendous. No hugs or love at all. Both abusive parents are gone, but I don't feel the loss. In my mind its....Oh Well. I just don't feel much about them being gone. I recently learned about the "roles" in the family through therapy. I'm the lost child. My narcissist sister is the mom. My younger brother is the comic/clown, and older brother is still the scrape goat. We have really never connected. We will never be a family. I'm not sure I will miss my siblings when they're gone, that is if they go before me. Kinda sad but that's how it is.
I’m more of the Emotionally distant side, while my siblings are more of the Choatic household side.
My brother and sister bully me consistently and do not understand that it really hurts me. They laugh at my tears and so I’ve been taught over time to repress the emotions and only show my good and goofy side. Two or more years of struggling with hidden depression has thrown me into being a people pleaser, who is almost always stressed and depressed and forgets everything because I’m consistently tired.
I’m taking therapy but I still refuse to tell my family on how I’m feeling. Self harm thoughts have just started to creep into the bunch. A few teachers of mine are worried about my mental health because I’ve had multiple mental breakdowns in school.
I’ll be (hopefully)making videos talking more in depth about these thoughts.
the last one feels more relating since I suffer from a verbally abusive mother. the verbal abuse only began this september and has been escalating badly. I'm just lucky to have friends who are willing to take care of me emotionally howver they can to keep be going until I can move or live on my own.
The worst part is - I can't defend myself or it'll get worse. And she never takes my opinion or emotion in consideration since she's actually selfish.
If i had to choose ONE. Its the last one all the way and now everyone wants to get close to me but Im not like that. I dont want help from them really I feel awks even trying to show my love to them. It feels weird amd they know it...
Pathological household? I literally thought this was normal. I've never known anything else. My mother has always told me that since I'm her daughter it's my job to do things for her. She says it doesn't matter if she's always drunk or high because it's my responsibility to take care of my younger siblings. I don't even want to have children of my own because I feel like I've already raised two.
Except the addiction on toxic chemicals, both my dad's wives were following the exact same pattern towards me, each one for different reasons. I'm also a woman who doesn't want to have her body, time and efforts drained by another individual (such as having kids), because I'm more than enough exhausted by it for the next reincarnations I could possibly have (if there happens to be such stuff 😂). I only want to adopt kids, provide them with a healthy lifestyle and save them from hell, as there was no woman doing this for me.
LOL my family has a complex combination of 4 kinds..
The funny thing is that my abusing parent would blame on me...
And on top of that she would be gelouse on me too...
So I "divorced" my family because God said "Don't give diamonds to pigs". Hallelujah for saving me 🙏
God says you're welcome.
😂 I LOVE IT!
college college 1 ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
I want to divorce my family too... I believe that God wouldn't want us to be in abusive situations.
,..
I think this channel is amazing because it is helpful in many ways. It raises mental health awareness (and other stuff), it educates people about physiology, and it can act like a therapist for people who are too afraid to look for therapy (I know this channel shouldn't be a persons main source of therapy but it can be a large step in doing so and make an individual more confident to go get help)
I swear on My *YEEZYS* my family is dysfunctional in everyday
Edit* Everyway not everyday*
Oh yeah definitely My *YEEZYS* didn’t fail me this time
Ahhh Yugggh Glad to hear they didn’t fail you this time 🌊
Psych2Go hahah
Thanks for your ongoing support! Your comments are very memorable.
Psych2Go Hi I went to your website and in the about us section It didn’t really tell me about the team as individuals who exactly are you guys ? Like I read about your mission and goals but who is the team who are the people behind this? University students? I’m confused
Thank you guys for all videos !!!
I feel like there are a lot more than five types.
My family cant get together once without an argument. Any affection i show to my brother will just get me kicked away and yelled at. My parents always blame me for things. They talk about how my brother is so much smarter than me. I feel like my family can be nice one second and then ripping apart the next. My mom has constantly shamed me for being shy and has repeatedly called me a mute or retarded. And my dad will get really angry over anything is mess up on. I feel scared when he yells at me. I mean theres more in my extended family but that doesnt really matter. Idk exactly what to identify my family as? Can i have a little help?
My family is like that too. They don't argue a lot because my dad represses his emotions in front of my mom. My brother is rather uncaring and bossy with everyone, always pushing me away to focus on his games and videos. Whenever any of them get mad at me, I just sit there quietly and hope I won't start crying. I don't know if I can help much, but I am here if you need. a shoulder to talk to.
Catarina Batista thank u.. i hope that things get better for u. I dont have any advice obviously but i guess we should just try to keep out heads up? I honestly cant really tell about my family to people i know because the people i know wont even believe me. But thx for replying to me! I appreciate it!
kiwi birbie Thank you for you too! Sometimes keeping a heads up is the best way to keep living. I don't talk much about my family, because people are unable to put themselves in my shoes. It becomes easier to bear all the weight on my shoulders then to talk to people about it. I hope you have a good life and be happy anyways.
Catarina Batista i hope u end up living happily too! The hard times will eventually pass. But dont feel like u need to keep everything in. I know i dont know u but if worst comes to worst just comment on one of my vids and u can dm me and let it all out. Good luck out there!
I feel you
You missed one. The ones THAT ARE ALWAYS FIGHTING. I cant leave my bed in the morning without seeing someone fighting or they all GANG UP ON ME.
same all the little kids ganged up on me and one of them was bashing my head on the floor but we all just laugh it off
I just came across this channel and i love it. Sooooo educational..
I don't know why but I really almost cried and felt sad while watching this..
Wow, this is... enlightning! I just realized my family was a mix of authoritarian + emotionally distant. It wasn't until I started therapy on my own by a whole different issue that my psych told me that part of my issues stemmed from my family dynamic and it finally made sense when I knew about my sister being referred to psychology for Anxiety... wow..
I used to think my family was normal and it was ridiculous for me to think that something was wrong with it. I realize now that my family is pretty emotionally distant and honestly, sometimes i still have a hard time accepting it because its so hard for other people to see.
I grew up thinking my family is the most normal family ever, took me the longest time ever to realize how dysfunctional my family really is, after comparing my family with my friends'.
Even after I figured out something is wrong, I blamed it on the fact that I have ADHD, causing me to react differently.
The last year was especially hard, my grades dropped at school and I sank into severe anxiety. No matter how hard I try it's so hard to open up to people who try to help at school.
My family fits 1,3 and 5 and somewhat into 4 as well.
definitely 4, my dad is an alcoholic and when he doesnt have alcohol in his system hes disrespectful to my mom, my siblings and i making my mom be mad at us for no reason, but for some reason i still continue to love and care for him the most
1:56 chaotic is now pronounced chronic
She read it wrong. lol I noticed that too.
Theres ppl that shouldnt have kids, ppl that shouldnt be teachers, etc. Basically theres ppl that shouldnt exist. Been there, done that, yes i relate 2 the video #sadstory. Its important 2 forgive and heal of course, but its a process and the damage marks ur life in some level. I cried more from reading the comments than from watching the video lol. "No one is perfect but we all deserve 2 be happy." Blessings from Mexico!
The 1st one called me tf out, Christ almighty.
oof me too
I'm in a rabit hole of your toxic family videos and it's making me sad but I can't stop.
The last one is 100% my family.
same lol
CrystallizedSoul658 Internet hug
Paul Lytle Thank You ^^
CrystallizedSoul658 your welcome dont let toxicity spread
I went here to look for a title that fits my family. Guess I was wrong. Im not sure if its dysfunctional or Im just overreactiong(probably the latter) but Ill explain the situation.
Basically my family is fine. Its okay on the outside, my friends look up to my mom as being the cool person and they look to my dad as being the generous and kind dad. But when things gets tense, it all goes to the gutter.
*Note: Its alot of reading, If you dont like it, Ill provide a summary at the end*
Basically, my parents have no sense of space. No matter how many times I explain to them that I want to just have some time alone, they force themselves into my space. No matter what I say, whether it be truth or a blatant lie, they just force themselves in my personal space. They keep on pushing the boundaries. When I promised a friend that I wont tell anyone about their problems, my mom overheard me and tried to force me to say it. I said no and that I made a promise. She got mad and said "I'm your mom. You dont trust me?" Then she sulked and ignored me from the groceries to home. They want to know every secret about me. I know its not bad but when you just dont want to talk about it, they force me to talk about it. They get mad when I dont. Some things I better not say like for example my _"measurements"_. They want to know and if I dont tell them they scowl and get all gloomy and sad. When I tell them firmly to stop after alot of pestering from them they say "Hey! You don't have to say it that way! We are your family! You should never hide any secrets from us." then they scowl and act really dejected. It's really ticking me off and no matter how many times I explain it to them, its like they never heard me say anything. They say "okay, okay." However, the next day I am greeted with the exact same thing.
When my mom gets mad, she becomes the Tiger Asian Mom. We all know that kind of mom, but she takes it to the next level. She begins shouting to the tops of her lungs, screaming at us that "You dont care about me! You are so selfish! You never thank me for anything! I AM NOT loved in THIS house!!!" I mean I get it, I screwed up so bad. I lied about doing my chores I get it. Im the one at fault. But then she says "This is why I DONT WANT to come back home from work!!! Its because NO ONE APPRECIATES MY PRESENCE!!! Hell, I even wonder when you say 'Love you mom!' I DOUBT you are saying from your heart! YOURE just saying it as lies when you WANT something!"
That statement hurts me more than anything. Lets get some backstory of me.
Im a 14 year old guy who got diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder since May this year. Even before that, I find it VERY VERY difficult to express any emotion strongly and meaningfully to someone. Like I severely doubt my desperateness and my truthfulness is reaching anyone. I find it hard to express my love for someone or something. That's why I dont do chores as much but I dont use depression as an excuse. So when I finally express my love for my parents and she brushes it off as if its nothing I feel so hurt. Because all that effort to just finally make someone notice my feelings is so tiring and its too much for me. But thats not all. When someone is criticizing me or tell me I did something wrong, I always make a blank face. Just a black face staring into the person who is talking to me. My mom shouted at me and said "HEY! Why are you angry, huh? You DONT HAVE the RIGHT to be angry? Is all this a joke to you? Oh, I see. You're sleepy. So all my words are meaningless to you. Oh, dont mind me, Im just talking to the wall behind you." It hurts because I dont know what face to put on! Should I smile? Look sad? Feel scared? I dont know! When someone shouts at me and tells me my wrongs, I list them down in a mental note and discuss it with my inner monologue while listening to the person, so I dont have the time for emotions. But everyone thinks Im mad and it just makes the situation worse cause honestly, I dont know what to do.
All this and Ive learned to supress feelings and opinions. My mom always gets mad at me for not "explaining my side" or "not saying anything". Anytime I did that as a kid, she always shouts at me and says "Oh! Youre always right thats why. Whatever I say or do, I am ALWAYS WRONG and you are ALWAYS RIGHT!!!" She still says it to me today. So I learned to keep my mouth shut and never explain because in the end, the one who gets hurt is my mom, not me who deserves it. Ive been reppressing alot of feelings and thoughts and emotions because I always feel that all that is invalueable to the situation because of what my parents always told me when i said my side of the story.
And my dad... Well.... He always gets mad at me. No matter how many times I explain, my monotonous voice, to him means "He is mad." My monotonous voice is a result of repressed emotions and opinions and socially, Its not going so well.
And as with other Asian cliches, my parents rarely admit they were wrong. No matter how much pain their words cause, even when they are dead wrong, they dont say they are wrong. My dad calls me an idiot in Japanese, he laughs it off. My mom said something wrong and I corrected her, she says "Oh. sorry." in a very sarcastic voice that sounds alot like "You lil shit."
Basically:
Parents look good outside
Parents dont know personal boundaries
Mom goes into rampage and ignores all my feelings
Im depressed and find it hard to express feelings
I dont know how to voice my feelings
Im not heard by my parents
My parents never admit they are wrong
Can someone please reply? I dont know if this is normal for households or abnormal
Boe Man For me, coming from an Asian family, I can strongly relate to this. My mother is the villain here too. However, it's more along the lines of her belittling my father and pushing him around than the children. My family situation is a mix of 3, 4, and 5. And to answer your question...it is not normal. But common.
Sorry, I don't have time to read the whole thing. But based on the summary, you have an abusive, dysfunctional family. They're not treating you well. I hope you can find some help outside of the family.
Your family is dysfunctional and it is making a lot of things in your life worse. If your parents loved you they would try to understand. Also, if you are over 16 or so they should give you some space and began treating you more and more like an adult.
> "They want to know every secret about me.
> "I know its not bad but when you just dont want to talk about it, they force me to talk about it.
> "They get mad when I dont.
Ten+ others here have agreed with you; they have similarly NARCISSISTIC parents (NP). NP is not the personality disorder "NPD". NPD can only be labelled by a professionally on-duty psychologist. NPD-type of behaviour is very, very common. Particular when any of us are being personally stressed, parent or not.
By standards of last century, the people called "parents" are untrained, unskilled, unqualified and poorly resourced. If you are legally dependent on these incompetent practitioners in our caring industries, there is very little that any professionally trained person can do. At the moment.
Seems that right now you are trapped by incompetent legal carers. Do what I had to do: button up (stay silent & hidden) until you can legally & financially leave your home. Then concentrate of rescuing your damaged personality from such a traumatic childhood.
Your mother knows that she is incompetent, as did my father. These incompetent parents are asking the impossible: that the carees (children) teach the carer how to do their caring job. Recognise your limits.
It is the job of professional teachers like myself to teach carers (parents here) on how to be more competent. Until you are professionally qualified, do not attempt to do these professional jobs. When you do become professional, you will "professionalism". Professionalism means outsourcing your home problems. The professional does not "heal thyself".
my mum grew up in a chaotic household where she had to do everything for her family. literally everything. even today whenever she talks about it, she would be laughing at first then suddenly burst into tears. now in my family, we’re emotionally distant. i’m always trying to impress my mum. the whole world could say shit about me and idc but when it’s from her, it HURTS
Recognizing traits from all of these dynamics is a long overdue wake-up, but I know its been my hubris and passive-avoidant behavior that I must come to grips with in a healthy, theraputic manner. Gratitude worth expressing for friends and family that are supportive and maintain open lines of communication even when loved ones seem like more trouble than wurth, you make the difference in us.
I really dont know what category mines fall into. My dad was an abusive alcoholic in the past and all my parents argued about was money and how my dad was always out. They had many fights and i’ve witnessed it all. My mom has always been controlling and almost everything has to go her way or you’re thrown to the road. she used to be really religious and stricter but things changed last year when there was a big fight between my brother and my dad. :/ that resulted in my brother leaving and my dad emotionally abused us for a week before he suddenly changed and he stopped drinking alcohol. but the roles switched and my mom started being alcoholic, blaming my dad for everything even tho he has changed, going to the club every other night, smoking weed and forcing my dad to give her money. she also yells at me whenever i ask her something that i need that is money related. this affected me a lot in school. money problems, depression , self harming , low self esteem and a upcoming divorce between my parents. just recently my mom has slowed down a lot and is trying to get better but its too late for my mental health 😂.
let’s also add that a few months ago electricity/ lights were turned off and i had to stay with my auntie for 2 weeks with my annoying bragging cousin. i was also in a relationship with a cocky boy who was self centered and didn’t give a fuck about my feelings and talked with my ex friends about me behind my back. but i believed i loved him and stuck by it all, until it ended. he was the cause of me starting self harm again and now it’s a problem. currently we’ve had no water for a week and im sitting here contemplating a lot of suicidal things.
😢😭
My family is a mixture between 1 and 5. Oh my god I can’t wait to leave this horrible house!
So much of this is right on point for me.
The chaotic family when I was little but now it's emotionally distant
Day by day it's more impossible to cope.
Lord Sesshomaru stay strong u will get through this once u are 18 u fly out and then u will have the rest of you life to be happy and to heal.
When you think your family’s normal until you find out your family is emotionally distant
I know my parent I see them on weekends but I don't talk to them at all other than arguing over petty things. There is no communication on what needs to be done but they expect my brother and I to just read their mind and then the arguing begins. Finally moved out and going no contact because I don't really have any emotional attachment to them
#5. I still can't talk with my family cause of my major depression.