The Layers of a Clean House (Why Cleaning Feels so Hard)
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- Опубліковано 30 лис 2023
- There are layers of a clean house. If cleaning feels incredibly difficult to you, this will explain why it's harder for you than for others, and what to do to make it easier.
NOTE: I published this with no sound for a portion of it yesterday, so I'm republishing today with it hopefully corrected!
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Layers
1) daily pickup/tidy - return to baseline
2) decluttering
3) cleaning
Thank you
Thanks Mia. I hate all the build up! 😂
@@Ann65.i had it playing at 1.5x speed 😄
Build up is part the story! @@Ann65.
4. Vaccuming and dusting
5. Washing
Could also break it up further by doing different rooms on different days
A family member of a neighbor who had recently died knocked on my door unexpectedly last night and I invited her in. At that moment I realized what an impact Dana’s teachings have had on me … there were no dishes in the sink, the sofa and coffee table were clear. (I try to do that as my last “check” of the evening) . I know there are plenty of other areas that still need lots of work (!) but at least the visible spaces …the entry and seating area … are almost always orderly now. She actually mentioned how pleasant it was to be relaxing in such a comfortable and clean space ( particularly because she had been dealing with the monumental task of clearing out her brother’s years of clutter and collectibles) . It was a real eye opener for me. Hoping that challenges me to finish the “project” but at least I now know I can safely open the door :)
Awww 🎉❤🎉❤ how wonderful!!!! Congratulations 🎉❤🎉❤🎉
This is wonderful! Thank you for opening your door for someone of your community in need, even late in the evening.
Ultimately, this is the reason why we do all the work - to have a space to relax, to give our family a place where they can rest and grow and to welcome our community in times when they need us.
Good for you! That’s a huge milestone
This is what my parents used to tell us... Be ready for company.
Gave a Hugh sigh of empathy reading this; that’s just what we all want from a home, being able to open the door, without notice and invite someone into a calm place. Well done, v v v well done ❤
As someone whose house is always neat and declutterred I can tell you once you start doing this daily it’s not a big deal and makes you feel good and accomplished.
I make my bed daily. I never leave stuff in the sink. I put away laundry immediately and do lots of small loads rather than getting behind.
I say this as a former slob. It can be done.
That's very cool, congratulations! I'm somewhere in between right now but it's already life changing.
This is exactly what I'm working on now , I call it cleaning up behind myself daily! ❤
Same! I chose to declutter *drastically* at some point last year and got rid of a LOT of stuff. I feel liberated, and ever since, my home is tidy and spotless. It’s wonderful. And it doesn’t take any effort to keep it maintained.
I used to be like that also.. before fibro and adhd
I was raised on this principle (do small chores immediately, set a regular schedule for the bigger ones), so I was honestly flabbergasted by this video. It never crossed my mind some people might not know.
My household is far from perfect, though. At any given moment, there are half a dozen projects (I should paint the kitchen cabinets, I should build a shelf for the storage room, I should repair the flooring in some spots ...) and it used to drive me nuts. Because there is never an end to them. You get a handle on one issue and the next one will pop up.
So, what I had to learn is that perfection is impossible to achieve, not just for me but for anyone. And that it's not something I should expect of me (or anyone). Instead, triage is the name of the game. While keeping a weather eye on my own mental and physical health.
I also learned to set hard rules to make my life easier. Absolutely *no* shoes beyond the entrance area; I bought an easy to clean rug specifically to demarcate the boundary and won't tolerate even one single step beyond. No accumulation of trash (empty bottles, bags, containers) or food items left sitting in random places - and everybody is responsible to clean up after themselves. No random cluttering; I designate spaces for small items (e.g. keys, wallets), for coats, shoes, electronic devices and *that* is where they go, not some random place where you'll never find them again.
So true. I recently, approaching 80, hired someone to clean for us. The morning she's due to come, my husband refers to as our "pre-cleaning." I know it to be what is done before cleaning actually begins. Putting meds away, making sure all clothes are put away, dishes in dishwasher, etc. It only takes a few minutes, but I know only too we'll it's impossible to clean well if you're dealing with clutter.
We did that with our house cleaner - getting the trash and clutter out of the way of her getting rid of dirt.
It sounds counter-intuitive (like, “why clean if you’re having cleaners come?), but that’s actually a really solid idea. Some cleaners won’t even come in if you’ve got too much stuff lying around. Our friends hired cleaners to come while they were out of town but didn’t realize they only cleaned the house, not the stuff collected in the house (bags of trash, dishes, etc.). We had to go in and do the pre-clean for them because the house cleaners couldn’t reach any of the actual house to clean. 😅
I always smiled when my friends did the pre cleaning ritual. Today I get it. They were doing the first level of cleaning! I'm thinking I better go do the dishes.😂. Ciao.
I quit a good paying cleaning job because she thought I was her personal servant. I came in twice a week and she let all the dishes pile and didn't even scrape the food out. Cups of milk sitting for days. Absolute filth. I cleaned 10 hours a week and it never looked much better because she trashed it after I was gone. I took way too much pride in my work to endure that. I told her I can't get her house clean cause I finish one area and the next time I come in another area is disgusting. She didn't understand to keep a clean house she had yo actually pick up after herself
This makes so much sense, I've always struggled bc of clutter, it's helped me look at it in a way thats less overwhelming, thankyou lady 😊
ADHD makes the decluttering mentally exhausting. Doing it daily is a huge help for me. Thank you for the inspiration.
Same here. I don’t have a problem with the first layer. But it is the second layer I have problems with.
When the decluttering is done the dusting, polishing, and vacuuming is actually fun. Decorating for holidays is fun, and having guests is fun. Thank-you Dana !
This explains why this Thanksgiving was so different from previous years: I wasn't sleep-deprived & barely out of the shower when guests arrived....and when they left, leftovers were put away, the dishwasher was turned on & all there was left to do was wash 2 oversized dishes (platter & pot) and wipe down the counters & stove. The decluttering & dailies were done, just the actual Thanksgiving to deal with!
What a great win!
We had guests on Saturday, the week was crazy, and I took some time on Friday to tidy and catch up on the dailies that got neglected during the week. On Saturday morning I had plenty of time to deep clean our whole home, decorate for Christmas, get myself ready and I even made a batch of cookies before our guests arrived late afternoon.
I love that I am able to do some little extra things to make my home especially nice because I usually do the dailies. For example, I fill up the soap, change the towels and put up a fresh roll of toilet paper. Or I make the dining table look extra nice with a center piece. I make sure that there is space for our guests to hang their coats and drop their hats, scarves and gloves.
I much rather let people feel welcome in my home than hoard stuff.
Thank you Dana for this reminder of what needs to be done in order to have the house under control. Love how you show the process.🙂
@@Conval-wi5eh I love that last comment. I too would rather be able to welcome people than keep aot if stuff. I've just to make it a reality.
Very difficult to relate to when one by nature is very neat, clean and organized. My closets and pantry look like retail store display/staging. Not bragging but some folks are just born with the neat gene and are sensitive to the aesthetics of their personal surroundings/space.
@@andreaschmall5560 my oldest brother is a neat/minimalist freak, bless him! He was in the military and I think that really had an impression on him as a young man as far as keeping personal items to a minimum. I admire it. His wife is neat as a pin as well - I'm kind of jealous. They have nice furnishings and a nice home - two incomes help, for sure. I'm widowed so it's been a bit of a struggle financially, especially in the early years. I'm sure I've found comfort in my nifty things, but now my home is definitely "cluttered". Time to apply Dana's methods to help get control. Finally, a process that makes sense to me! I was never taught it's ok to get rid of things that were no longer needed or really wanted. Part of it was a "poor" mentality - my parents were very frugal and I often felt I was "doing without". So tended to cling to my stuff. I never had the skills to manage a home even though I could do all the individual "chores" - I was seldom consistent with my efforts. Wish me luck! I'd love a beautiful pantry! ;)
Dads number one lesson. Put it back where it belong and do it now. Makes life SO much easier.
My issue is that so many of my things don't have a place to go
@@anatolia0222 same here, "everything needs a home" but there's not enough space for everything sometimes.
@@tracymatherson8174 I understand. Now I've reached a tipping point and need to let some things go. There's no doubt I can let go of a lot more than I initially realize.
We always tell our kids “don’t put it down, put it up.” I think that may have come from @minimalmom here on UA-cam.
You speak my language! My poor Mother (even at 81) cannot fathom how I can look at things and still NOT see them! And, the number of items in my house that have NO HOME is truly disturbing. Thank you for continuing to encourage us!
@gaylabaker333 I'm right with you at the beginning stage. Not seeing things and no home for things. With Dana, I feel a lot of hope!
I’m so with you on this. The phrase I just can’t see it popped into my head the other day and now you mentioned it too. I thank the Lord for people like Dana. Such a blessing
Looking at things and not seeing them😂. That happens to the best of us. It's a habit that I have to change. I believe mastering that will make all the difference.
Everything should have a home
I used to have a cleaner home but got horribly sick and just let the clutter build. Now that I am healing it is a slow process to get to that point, but I work at it every day.
An extra bonus of doing the first 2 layers is that then the actual dirt can't hide. So if a surface is decluttered, it's much easier to see the first layer of dust or the first coffee spill, so wiping it up is simpler and I'm more likely to just take care of it. Wiping up one coffee dribble isn't THE BIG DREADED CLEANING, it's 10 seconds with a paper towel. It's like dishes math: the first cleaning can take time but after that it's just little catch ups.
Haha I love that, "cleaning math." So true!!!
How is something you just “discovered” already conveniently in your book ??????
I just want to thank you. I grew up in a hoarders home. I was never taught how to keep a clean home. I have been doing this for 2 days and I am so happy! You have changed my life for the better and for my future generations.🙌 Thank you so very much.
I was raised in a hoarders home. I feel ya.
This is why I love this channel - you show your real mess and cereal boxes and wrinkly clothes that have been in a suitcase for four days.
Exactly.
Yes!
This concept really opened my eyes to why my house was so frustrating before I started decluttering. I had to move so much stuff around to wipe off the table, then I had to move stuff (sometimes the SAME STUFF) to sweep the floor. Every task required moving stuff around first. 😅 I still have a ways to go with decluttering, but I can usually get by with just a 5-minute pick up before I can clean my table and floors now. My house has space to live instead of just space to hold things. 😄
I wish I could get to that point. But I have my adult daughter, her five kids and her fiance living here. It's always a cluttered, piled, filthy mess. It's been years since I have allowed anyone into my house. (She lets people in so I guess they assume it's just all MY mess)
Your last sentence really hit home for me.....for so long my house has just been a space to hold stuff, not actually a space to live. 😬🤦♀️
@@evelynlee3323 Girl, you CAN get to that point! You have got to set some BOUNDARIES with every person that lives in your house, including the kids. Every single person should be cleaning and of course cleaning up after themselves. I know all too well what a difficult task this can be, but you gotta do it. All people in the home are responsible for the mess. Make them do it.
@@cassthompson3386great advice, thx for offering it😊, but she's dealing with a whole lot of dynamics, my heart goes out to her, I'll remember her in my prayers.
Prayer can work wonders!
@@evelynlee3323cassthompson is so very right.
I found this video helpful as a homeowner, but I wanted to comment as an educator. It can be very challenging to try to get students to understand why they should clean up after themselves when they think, “the janitor will just do that.” The layers and defining cleaning helps to show where the delineation is between personal student responsibilities and janitorial cleaning of the classroom or cafeteria. Thank you.
I love this comment and wish it would be implemented in every classroom. What a truly helpful life skill.
I wish we made the kids clean up the classroom like they do in Japan. But this is a good start
As an elementary school teacher, we always have a 5 min cleanup at the end of the day…to clean out their desks, their pencil boxes, and the top of their desks. Doing this daily is key to helping them be able to accomplish this goal..and they come in the next morning with clean and organized desks! Makes a world of difference!
I told my grand kids, if you learn one thing in your lifetime this would be it.
#1 get what you want
#2 use it
#3 your not finished / till you put it back
123. So all one has to say is 3
As a retired, 30 yr school food service employee, THANK YOU. I was always agast to see what kids would leave behind when they would go to empty their lunch trays. The tables would literally be COVERED in napkins, empty milk cartons, discarded brown bag lunches/contents, apple cores, banana peels, candy/chip/sandwich wrappers, juice boxes, etc. If it wasn't left on top of the table, it was discarded underneath. Yes, kids are going to leave random stuff and drop things onto the floor but this was over the top. One of my jobs was to clean/sanitize table areas and sweep up when a class left the lunch area. It was insane. I assumed they must live in a pigpen. THANK YOU for caring enough to make them try.👏👏👏
Big Ah ha moment! Really explains why we constantly chase our tails. How many of us have told ourselves "I've been cleaning all day and it doesn't look any better"? Thanks Dana! Great video. Your process works. You are changing lives.❤
You just made me understand why sh!t never gets done right 😅
I decided to try a 30 minute pickup in your method after doing 30 minutes of my overwhelming giant dish pile. Holy cr@p! I just may be able to sweep my floor! I heard you in my head, throw out the trash, look for the trash, and take it there now take it there now…
Thank you. I love you.
Something else I've learned over the years is to keep as many items off the floor as possible. This makes cleaning the floors so much easier and looks cleaner even if it isn't.
I'm still struggling with this. My floors always get littered first I'm ashamed to say. I don't know where to put things! 😵💫😵💫
@@PeppermintPat
😢Is it a lack of closet space or storage space? If that's the case, maybe eliminate as many items as you can by donating, throwing, or giving away what you can.
It's amazing how little we really need to survive and still be comfortable. Keep trying, and you'll get there ❤
Do not refilm this! Its very authentic...right down to the rumpled shirt. Because that's how we "untidy types" are and think. And I am today years old to finally find out that there are three layers. And I have a cereal box and a huge stack of dishes to "clean around' in order to clean the house. I'm nearing 60 and I've never quite gotten it right. I always figured it was hiding behind the accepting hoarder grandmother and shielding myself from my hyper critical dust ball chasing appearances matter mother.
Its literally Christmas morning when I watched this. With fresh eyes, I'm thinking.....daaaang. Getting up to do the daily right now.
Thank you.
As someone who cleans homes professionally I agree 100%!
I ask my clients to tidy up/pick up and declutter BEFORE I arrive so I could get to the actual CLEANING. Otherwise I couldn't scrub, dust, or wash anything and it would cost EXTRA to move hoards of stu
Brilliant. Breaking it down like that - decluttering, tidying, cleaning - is necessary when "cleaning" has become shorthand for the whole process. I think it has, for many people. And the epiphany you're describing is "effortless" - when you break it down and do a little every day, it never becomes overwhelming, and keeping it up is practically effortless, so it feels like "nothing". As a lazy person, I embrace this.
My father in law gave me great advice, never leave a room empty handed. If im going to a room and there's something in there that belongs in the room I'm going to, I need to take it with me. Helps.
Please don't remake this video! It is so real, and relatable, and that's what makes it (and you) so great! Thank you for being true with us. And thank you for your wisdom and motivation! ❤
I second this!! Thank you 🙏🏼
I so much agree with you .
I being a full time housekeeper for 29 years , working for 15 years for one family now .
It’s a revelation to me what you just said about the 3 layers I never thought of it . I do this every day gosh . I always tell my boss cleaning a house is more complex than you think , and I do t think she gets it . I myself couldn’t explain or put in words now I know . I realized how important is my work I do a zillion things in one day and the house which is a mansion is spotless cleaned , organized and neat at all times . 😊
Impressive!!! That is a lot to manage…
I remember asking a friend that is a house cleaner how much she would charge to help clean my house. Had no clue at the time (hadn’t ever really decluttered in my life yet) why she was asking me what I consider cleaning. When I mentioned things like helping tidy up, unload the dishwasher, clean the showers etc- she said I’m sorry. I will have to decline. I asked her why, and she said she only* cleans. She doesn’t do chores or tidying. I’m sure she could tell from my answer that I had no ideas layers existed 😂 way to go for doing all you do for the one family. I’m sure if you were gone on vacation they would realize how much you do. 💕
Just got your “14 days to opening your front door to guests”… I don’t actually have any plans for guests right now but hopefully it will give my house (and my mindset) a nice reboot before Christmas gets here!! Also doing the take back your house program this new year… yea!!! I have a small house with six kids under 10… Your methods have been life changing for me… I am so grateful for your content!
Yessss she is the best!!!
Love this! It is the way I clean! The one thing I make sure to do every night is to clean my kitchen, including the sweeping. I was taught by my mother that sweeping the kitchen floor meant the kitchen was clean! There is just something about walking into a tidy, clean kitchen first thing in the morning that gets the day off to a good start! And decluttering constantly!
Thank you for guiding so many of us on this journey! And yes, I know what a doololly is! All us Texas girls know doololly, dodads, thingamajigs, and whatchacalkits!
Not just Texas. I'm in Michigan and with age and a couple of head injuries, I need those replacements for when I can't think of a word more than ever.
I'm from da North and we use all those words except I hadn't heard of doololly... we use doohicky instead! 😂 I'd say the most often one I hear (and use) is just plain 'ol "thingy." 😂
I get dishes and things done, when i want. Im not obsessive. My mom didnt need to teach me how to do the obvious. 😊
Doo-hicky and thing-a-ma-bob!
Housemates and had a 24 hour dish rule - wash what you've used within 24 hours - if you've extra time and are feeling generous, wash them all! And keep the shared areas free of personal items / do a daily tidy ...
We spent ~ an hour each week cleaning those shared areas, taking out compost, recycling and trash - with a chore chart rotation. And we were company ready most of the time!
My daughter has a daily chore chart rota for her family (12 + 13 year old at home)
I have noticed that a lot of people often get 2 terms confused when they talk about getting their homes in order: to clean vs. to tidy, using the term "clean", whether as a verb or an adjective, invariably. And yet they are 2 slightly different concepts.
To tidy means to pick things up and putting them away or back where they belong, straightening stuff up (folding up the blanket on the sofa, straightening up the cushions etc.). whether it's a 5 minute pick-up or a longer session. Tidying includes decluttering and organising.
Cleaning on the other hand is simply removing dirt: washing, dusting, vacuuming, mopping, polishing etc.
There's a reason why Marie Kondo's famous book is called "The Life-Changing Magic Of Tidying Up" and not "The Life-Changing Magic Of Cleaning [your home]" 😉 because she helps people declutter their homes and put their things where they belong in an orderly manner.
A tidy/not messy home can be dirty and a clean home can be untidy/messy. An ideal home is both tidy *and* clean, and keeping a space tidy makes it easier to also keep it clean as you Dana pointed out 😊
Being aware of the difference in notions can help to focus on the task at hand, not getting lost in wanting to get things clean when what you really need to do is just put stuff away a.k.a tidy.
Thank you Dana for republishing the video in its corrected version 😊🌺
It’s like when I first learned that cleaning was different from tidying. Thinking about this in layers is so helpful! I am going to keep in my mind that layer 1 is the daily tidying type stuff, layer 2 is decluttering (getting things out that don’t belong), and layer 3 is the actual cleaning (dusting, vacuuming, etc.) I have been trying to get to the cleaning part, but struggle with the first 2 layers, so now I know why.
I think I am the same place you are. My house is so bad, I just panic when someone comes to the door. It occurred to me as I listened to this (such an eye-opener!) that if I took it room by room I might be able to get a handle on something that has been years in the making. By that I mean. Start with the living room, and do the three layers one by one. Then go on to the next room, but keeping the first 2 layers up in the rooms I have done. Does that make sense? I probably didn't put it very intelligibly, but my house is way past a "get it done in one day" stage. When you live in a cluttered, dirty house, even tho you feel like you are forever cleaning and it just never shows, when you live like that your mind gets in the same shape!
@@juliapope7663 I understand what you are saying. I think that is smart to do one room at a time and work on maintaining rooms that have been cleared of the first two layers while clearing more rooms.
@@juliapope7663you said that so well, I found myself nodding along in agreement! Well put! 💚
Same with me.
This was very helpful! I got off the phone with a friend, saying that I needed to clean the house. I turned on your video for company and realized I wasn't "cleaning the house" at all, I was just catching up on neglected daily tasks. Eureka! If I keep up with the dailies, my cleaning time can actually be spent cleaning!❤
Your video makes complete sense to me. I recently started using a “Take It There Now” attitude throughout the day when I'm not decluttering, just living. It was an eye-opener. My normal is to delay everything such as “I’ll put the clean clothes away later.” There was always going to be some other time to take care of things but that time rarely came. Now, I feel peace when I take care of things as soon as possible because I'm not feeling the pressure of undone things yelling for my attention. I have some chronic illness so there are times I can't get to something right away, but there are overall fewer tasks to take care of and it brings me peace.
Same. I've been doing the "do it now" thing every so often and it's having a culmalative effect. I have chronic illness too. Also dealing with the procrasticlutter areas ( which can take hours!) Is transformational 🥳
Here is a phrase to think of instead of delaying. "Don't delay, put it away".
I have fibromyalgia and it is so difficult to even take a shower 13:10 and brush my teeth. I just found this channel. I will have to do some back watching her other videos.
@@kat517her books are also really great, I listened to them as audiobooks through Libby. She reads them herself and does such a good job
@@patriciagardner2498 I've finally learned that delayed decisions about my stuff = clutter breeding!
Thank you for this epiphany! No wonder I'm always too tired when it comes to the 'sanitization' step (Layer 3). This was very helpful. ❤
Thank you! So glad you posted this real life mess video. Please don't ever worry about the "mess" or a wrinkled shirt, we don't care about that, it makes us feel like we're real friends visiting you. :)))
And that we aren’t alone!
It’s early morning and you just woke me up more than my coffee!! I do good with the daily stuff but counted it as cleaning too. Thank you for helping me think of a clean home as having layers! I’m glad you decided to post this video!
I had a similar mindset shift on our family camping holidays. I could keep our campsite clean and orderly but not our house. I realised I was not lazy but couldn't manage all that inventory (as Dawn says).
Thanks for posting this - so helpful!! ❤
OMG! This is why when I hire someone else to clean my house I spend an hour before the they come “cleaning my house” which means I’m getting rid of all the stuff that’s in the way of actually cleaning. It’s stressful 😩 and seems so ridiculous. But there’s a lot of hilarious reels about this so I know I’m not alone. Also it’s why it’s easier to clean someone else’s house even with stuff around. I just clean and make it look neat and tidy and don’t have those dreaded feelings of “ I should get rid of this” or “why is this still here?”
Reid, I did not know "doololly" before Dana, but now I know it's the same as "whatchamacallit". Hi from Wisconsin.
And they are both cousins to 'thingamajig.' 😂
OMG 😳! You just put a name to what I was trying to figure out why my grandmother's house was ALWAYS....ALWAYS CLEAN!! She did exactly that!!
This is such a good visual lesson for me! Thank you Dana! Recently I've been decluttering like a maniac. Its like you are with me. One day I said to myself out loud...take it there now 😂. Now that I have momentum its becoming easier. I still have more to do but I'm not so resistant. One project I wasn't feeling like doing. I told myself...I'll just look at it. I thank you for explaining how I can get my brain unstuck. I appreciate you girl❤
Congratulations 😊
I say "Take it there now" to myself pretty frequently 😆 Also, "If I were looking for this, where would I look for it first?" 😁
Loved reading your comment. ❤
Me too! " take it there now" and I've already made the area better than I started. 😊
Every time I think you can't make what is so obvious to most people clearer to people like me, you do! Thank you.
You or your clothes don’t have to be perfect. I so appreciate your knowledge and getting it when you were able to just jump in and get video done. Thank you!!!!
Always so helpful! This micro-version of your house is a great example. I could also relate to your lake house example. When we had a cabin, I’d tell our daughter to leave the cleaning to us bc it was so much easier if she & her family just packed up & left. Removing 2 adults, 2 small kids, 1 big dog, & all their stuff made a huge difference!
These videos are so helpful because you speak our “language “. You keep on motivating me to persevere in decluttering so I clean more. We need to hear this over and over again.
Look at that! Over 10K views and you weren't even sure you were going to post this video!!! You need to make sure you post all your videos, even if you have those tiny doubts in your head! We all love you and appreciate the information you share! And no one cares if your shirt is wrinkled! 😊Thank you for this great information!
I was just like Dana! I said I was "cleaning" my house, but no dirt was actually removed. I spent all of my available time putting stuff where it went, or putting it in an out-of-sight place to make this area look better. Then, my time was up and NO cleaning was done! I was so disheartened because cleaning was my actual goal. Now, I know better about the first two steps and I do not include them in "cleaning" because they aren't cleaning!
This is an interesting concept. The FlyLady says to always, always clean the sink first. Then the laundry (a load a day keeps Mt. Washmore away.). Then, swish and swipe the bathrooms. After this, it moves to a vertical system based on the calendar.
I’m so glad there is someone out there who understands my brain and actually has a solution. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽. Heaven sent.
😆😄When I was a child I thought we had a family at church named Do-lolly. My mom would refer to anyone, whose name she could not recall, as Mr. or Mrs. Do-lolly. Thank you for your insight and help.
So much wisdom in this video! You really can maintain a tidy home if you learn to 1-stay on-top of the dishes; 2- stay on top of the laundry; and 3- do a house reset every evening (put things away!)
Then your house will LOOK clean even if it isn’t and when you get a chance to actually clean it won’t be so overwhelming. BUT the KEY is being vigilant with those 3 things. Bonus- the more you declutter, the easier it is to reset every evening! That is the KEY (for all living spaces, including kids rooms!)
No wonder I've always been so overwhelmed by house cleaning... I've been lumping it all together with daily chores and decluttering! Thank you for making this clear to me.
After getting pregnant with my 4th, I was feeling overwhelmed by the idea of managing the house with a newborn. I talked to my husband about it. We talked about getting a housekeeper. Then I started thinking about the fact that I would have to clean up the clutter beforehand anyway. After that was gone, cleaning isn't that time consuming. So, I started looking at cleaning routines on UA-cam. I found Flylady. I found you!!
Thank you for being real and relatable.
I just want to thank you for posting this video exactly how it is. I've watched SO MANY videos on cleaning and never seemed to get it. Thank you for defining and showing/describing examples of "picking up", "decluttering", and "actually cleaning". I have been stuck in a loop of catching up and stuff shifting and wondering why my house was never clean.
Same this really opened my eyes what cleaning what is not cleaning 😅
Dana, about the best introduction to this topic I’ve ever heard. There ARE layers and once this is understood, organizing your way to getting to the really CLEAN HOUSE is so much easier!!!
It's such a joy to see. My last live in gf would fight if I said anything about cleaning and I was a narcissistic sob. When I was finally alone the initial pickup was 28 bags of trash. 10 months later I'm finally getting mostly clean. No more rabbits quail chickens ducks or dogs in the house. No more being told I don't know how to live in the country. I forgot the goats. My little 800 sq ft is is becoming a home again. No surface untouched. The MS, heart issues have slowed things down but will be able to come home and heal from the leg bypass surgery coming up. Not quite a minimalist with 5 generations of items in the house but clean and organized.
Looks like what I call picking up after yourself.
Trying to understand why a family member doesn’t do this. Why don’t they throw the trash away right away? It’s literally 6 inches away from the can.
I so hear you! I am constantly asking my family to pick up their things so that I can clean. It drives me crazy! I waste so much of my time dealing w other people's daily/declutter stuff before I can clean that I never have the energy to do deep cleaning.
Update from 5 months ago:
With God's help, and my little brother, my room is now a minimalist-ish haven.
What used to take me 2 weeks to "clean," now takes a few minutes.
By eliminating some layers, now keeping my room clean takes daily trash throw out and vacuuming twice daily to keep in order.
Eliminating these layers was essential.
Now, because I have so much time every day, I can address other parts of my room that needs addressing.
It feels very nice.
Thank you.
Thank you for not deciding this video wasn’t good enough! It was exactly what I needed to hear today. Truth.
Dana - I love you 💕- you are so real and make me feel not alone in the world. You helped me change the way I live and I have found peace in my home. I now know that I’m not broken - I’m just a right brained person who needed to declutter- mastering the daily stuff is much easier when you have LESS! Lol
Your video explained what has been eluding me since I moved out of my parent's house over 30 years ago. You just explained what I haven't been able to fully understand. Bless you for helping us see the issues in a new light!!!
I’m 52 seconds in and I’m overwhelmed.
Thank you. I never saw it in layers, only one huge mess. Now I can break it down into workable chores.
We noticed something similar as far as family activities and we called them the 3 Steps. For example we are going on a picnic. Step 1; Shop, Cook, Pack a Picnic: we are good at Step 1. Step 2: Go on the Picnic: we are great at Step 2. Step 3: Come home and immediately empty the car, put the cooler away, store the leftovers. Step 3 was our downfall. It was really helpful to us. Now all we have to say is, "We need to do Step 3." And we all understand.
Love this !!! So easy to forget that most activities require prep (step 1) and clean up (step 3) but they're essential ! Sewing... gardening... anything really. :)
I have never heard it explained like this before- I now understand why I find it all so overwhelming- thank you! And I love how real and honest you are : )
This is eye opening 😮 thank you for breaking it down! No wonder I'm so exhausted when it comes to cleaning! Those dailies really build up!
Good realization! I think many of us grew up with Moms who got that daily cleaning/pick up done every day. But as lifestyles changed, it got dropped. Unless company was coming! 😂
I appreciate your channel so much. Both my parents are on the hoarding spectrum, and my life has always included too much clutter. And I hate cleaning. 🙄
I'm going through a messy divorce, and im planning on moving out this summer, with my two girls. I'm trying valiantly to declutter now, so that my new house can be a simple minimalist style. 🌞
Good for you girl! Lookin’ ahead to the future you!👏👏👏☺️
I am in the same boat. I lost my husband to cancer and now want to sell and minimize. So starting the ruthless decluttering so I can live simply. I’m excited about it but it’s hard to start and get rid of so much stuff.
So glad you decided to use this!! This is exactly what i needed today. Thing is…I know this stuff but hearing you saying it and reiterate the ‘WHY’ helps it not to feel so overwhelming-even though it is. Thank you Dana!
This made me finally realize why I have always felt like a failure and overwhelmed. Thank you,thank you,thank you!
Thank you Dana. No need to redo this video. It’s short, sweet and to the point. Sometimes a shortie is just what you need. They say advertising uses no more than 3 slogans or a three word slogan, because that’s what most of us capable of remembering. And these 3 layers are like a lightbulb moment for me! I feel I can cope! Thank you!
Yes, this was very helpful and it totally makes sense. I’ve never thought of it as the 3 levels of cleaning before and like you mentioned, I can never figure out why I can’t get my house cleaned (because it still needs a lot of decluttering). I keep telling myself, “one step at a time” and even if it’s only one dresser drawer that I have declutterred, that’s an improvement.
Love love love this!!!! ❤❤❤❤ I’m a big picture person and this overview is what I needed!! The detailed cleaning breakdown of other people’s videos never helped me. I need the big overview before the detailed parts! Thank you, beautiful!! ❤️❤️❤️
I've bought 2 of your books and it's been pretty life changing so far.
I had a wild mind shift realization over the summer reflecting on your teachings and reading the book a while back, Clean My Space that is similar of what you mentioned here. I do a full reset of the house, not cleaning. I work on one area a month going around the room(s) clockwise. I declutter and clean from top to bottom. That maybe common sense to many but this was revolutionary for me. Thank you for all that you do. You have helped me so much over the years. I also love your podcast.
I've come to the realization that when I just keep moving and cleaning small things, declutering as I find things, and tidying as I move through my day I feel so much less overwhelmed. Like Dana said, if you take care of the little things, the final layer is so much easier. And for me that means just keeping the movement up throughout the day and designating a "clock out time" everyday for housekeeping. I have something to look forward to and I feel so much better at the end of each day.
Of course! Daily stuff, especially the dishes and the 5 minute pick up 😊
And the clutter! I try to one-in-one-out to stay in maintenance
And my house is usually ok so I can let people in!
Not boasting here, it’s taken years!
Thanks Dana x
I’m so glad you showed the stuff all over! It didn’t make me feel so bad about my home, and motivates me to start!
I was married to a hoarder, and it would take me 8 hours to pick up the clutter and put it away. THEN I brought in a team of cleaning ladies. It was an absolute necessity to save my marriage. My husband used to say “they don’t clean very well” and I had to explain to him that they would clean around it if it was on the floor, slowing them down. Why should they have to touch your stuff? He grew to enjoy a clean house, but never stopped the hoarding. His mom was visiting us one time, and the day before the cleaning ladies came, she said (very telling) “why are you cleaning when the cleaning ladies are coming tomorrow?” I had to explain I was just picking up. You can see the difference in thoughts on cleaning.
I was talking about the layers of cleaning a couple days ago but not in this way. I am two weeks in on cleaning my house and it seems almost every time I get to the third layer of cleaning, someone in the household gets sick, this time it was both parents, my husband and me. I’m starting to wonder if the lack of third layer cleaning is what is protecting us from getting sick. 😅 When someone gets sick it throws a wrench in my routine motivation, and my house ends up filthy. This is actually VERY helpful to get the motivation back for keeping a clean house. Most of the time my first thought is, ‘I really want to scrub the kitchen countertops clean and sanitize them.’ But before I can do that I have to wash the days of dirty dishes, put away all the things, declutter all the toys that get brought in and randomly placed on the counter or table. Collect the random piles of mail which then send me on a different task of paying bills. In the meantime finding new areas that need a good scrubbing and making a mental list of what needs to be done to be able to get to this one area. By the time I get started my mental load is exhausted and now I have no energy to even begin. My house is a constant mess. In the last couple of weeks a new energy has found me and I’ve been doing the layered cleaning, even though I didn’t realize that was what I was doing. My main focus room was the kitchen, every day, until it was up to par. As I was engaging in the first and second layers of cleaning, it would take me from room to room in the whole house. I would take one thing to put away in a different room, and while in that room I would find something that needed to be taken back to the kitchen, whether it be dishes, snack foods, or trash. I would then continue my focus on the kitchen. After about 2 weeks of catching up in all the rooms, I was able to start the third layer of cleaning in several different rooms. My kitchen still has some deep cleaning to do, but I’ve been able to keep the countertops clear and keep up on the dishes. I’ve been able to vacuum all the floors in the house. But again, someone got sick and this time it was me.🤧 Now that I’ve learned about this layered cleaning you talk about, I believe it will be extremely helpful to getting back to a clean house again.
I’ve been sick this week and now I wish I felt like doing the dishes. Thankfully, not a lot of tidying to do in the living area.
Super helpful! It seems so simple, & yet makes perfect sense. I used to laugh when my elderly parents 'cleaned before the person arrived that they had hired to help them clean' - now I get it! Thanks for a great video!
This is a GREAT beginner's look at 'daily,' 'decluttering,' and then cleaning ... I now really understand the LAYERS to cleaning ... Thank YOU very much Dana!!! :)
I’m always astonished at what a difference picking up and taking out the trash makes. After that, you can look around and see what else needs to be done. It’s amazing. Another “freshen up” task that makes a huge improvement for time and energy spent is vacuuming. It’s a task I hate, but it is time well spent.
That's so true and like an epiphany to me, too! I kept procrastinating the daily, cluttering and cleaning, because it seems so overwhelming, I'd do it all at once, since that's a lot, cleaning and keeping it clean is always something hard to do, so I don't want to do it and keep pushing it away until it's unbearable or someone would come over. Basically, the thought of it makes me procreate, because of procrastination I'm forced to do it all at once, the burden of removing a mountain all at once makes it all seem so hard, that feeling makes me procrastinate and on and on and on. Vicious cycle.
My problem was always that I thought, ok I can do this, just keep it tidy and clean. But because the thoughts about those things are so negative, they weigh way more when doing it than the actual action!
I think you helped me understanding that I don't have to (and it's quite impossible really) do it all at once, focus on one layer first for a while, get that one to be a habit and release the negativity that surrounds it first, same process with the next layer and so on, until the heavy negativity is released and the cleaning and tidying can just be what it is, without the negative programming sabotaging it and weighing it down!
Thanks for sharing your realization! ❤ Very helpful and genius!
I love your videos. I am always asking myself, “If I needed this, where would I look for it?” “Take it there now!!” I can’t tell you how this has helped me. I have a ways to go, but I am beginning to form habits that will get me there! Thank you!! ❤
So helpful! This makes absolute perfect sense! Now I understand why my house feels so overwhelming to clean. This was very eye-opening to me and I think it will help me in my home, so thank you!
Wow Dana! What an eye opener for me. I am 64, work 70+ hours a week and never have a clean house, no matter how hard I try. You make it sound so simple. But it all takes time and that is the one thing that I am always short of. I intend to watch some of your videos, but if you have any specific tips for an old, worn out lady, feel free to add them. Thanks.
I am so glad you decided to post this Dana! 🎉❤ It really helps with the perspective. I have years of feeling overwhelmed by "cleaning" because all these layers, not to mention your 5 steps also helping me. I am grateful. Thank you so much for the work you do and for putting yourself out there for all of us to learn from. I am trying to gift myself with a clean and tidy home!
Hello! I can TOTALLY relate to this video. I used to do the same thing (daily pickup, decluttering, and cleaning) and felt exhausted afterward and HATED to clean. Since I used the Joshua Becker minimalism decluttering method, I now have less stuff and everything has a home to go back to after use. Makes it so much easier to clean!
Arg! Finally someone understands me! I used to always try to explain to my husband that it’s so frustrating to have to clean before I can clean!!! He alway looked at me like I had 2 heads 😂
I know I'm late for this comment, but Thank YOU! I wish I'd learned this 40 years ago - I was never taught how to keep a house. As a teacher I see a lot of high school students that don't know to clean or cook. Keep posting these videos!
I’ve forwarded this to my husband. I have chronic illness and just the thought of tackling the first 2 steps before I can even begin the cleaning is just so overwhelming a lot of the time. I’m always telling him and the kids to pick up and put away as they go to just help make the cleaning be done that much more easily. I hope this video helps him realise what I’m talking about.
I so connect with this! We had to replace our living room floor this summer after a radiator burst, which meant emptying everything out - and I vowed that nothing would go back in there that didn't belong! It helped that we also got 2 kittens shortly afterwards, who climb on and investigate everything, so there's some enforced minimalism as well 😀 With aid of a twice-weekly Roomba sweep, cleaning my living room is now a quick and easy job, not a major project!
Wow, this is such a motivator for keeping up with the basics and then finding a home for everything because I haven't been able to actually clean because of spending so much time on the first 2 layers!! Gosh, something so simple can be so revolutionary. Thank you so much for your transparency in showing us how to do it! Thank you!!
Day 1 of cleaning for Thanksgiving (we had 30 people over) was just picking up. Yes, my kids had to help. Day 2 was the actual cleaning. After Thanksgiving, (when the garage door was fixed, another story), my pile of donation stuff made it out of the house. It is so much easier to keep a house picked up than to get it there.
that’s how i declutter, one room at a time, what shouldn’t be in here. i’ve been in the process of emptying my parents house of furniture and clutter, this has been so much work for months…and now the holidays are here,we have birthdays to celebrate too….my house this week has piles of stuff everywhere! i have today off, i’m making the donation dump of things i have previously collected, and going room by room to get things back to a living order.
working to stay methodical, trying to control feeling overwhelmed…i like your approach because you tackle it like i do, start small, one thing at a time and suddenly you begin to pick up momentum. you’re always good to remind me to not get overwhelmed.
This video helped me more than the hundreds of other videos I've watched about cleaning and organizing
Last night, the conversation with my husband was," The kids and I clean alllllll the time. Yet the house still feel dirty. I hate cleaning because that is all I do! "
Thinking in different Layers of the house is so helpful. We homeschool so someone is always making a mess.
Thank you! My children will be watching this video ASAP.
Thank you for the real, down-home advice. I’m grateful for the reality check.
Thank you for articulating this Dana! It took me a long time to understand this and honestly I am still struggling with it most of the time! Right now I'm just coming out of a really dark and paralysing depressive time that latest over 8 months. All my good habits fell to the wayside and my house is a disaster. I refuse to crash and burn trying to get everything clean. It would take weeks, I'm not exaggerating! I will treat myself to some kindness and go back to just doing the first two steps. Do the daily and the declutter /organising first, reestablish those routines. The cleaning can come once I start seeing clear surfaces. Stuff that has not been cleaned in months can wait a little longer.
Dana, just watched a video from Candace of Simply this Life. She was singing your praises in the entire video. Just wanted you to be aware of it.
THANK YOU!!!! Gods, cleaning is always such an overwhelming, demoralizing, monumental task, and I could never figure out why. This just blew my mind. xDDDD
Now to internalize it all for myself and then teach my kids and "the hubby"
😜
Talk about putting things into perspective!
This video is relatable, do-able and diffused my feelings of overwhelm.
Thank you! 🎉