THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES

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  • Опубліковано 5 кві 2021
  • Case ########-29 Considerations of governmental oversight. Recorded by The Archivist in Situ. Content warnings: - Arguments - Scopophobia - Mass suffering - Poverty & Food insufficiency - Guilt    - Political expediency - Mentions of: Blood, self-inflicted wounds, physical violence, cults. coughing, yelling.
    Thanks to this week's Patrons: NicoleK, Micheala Poppell, Rebecca Rutherford, Mira Morning, freesnakepoems, Lind Berget, Erica Eagles, Max, Lucy Jansen, Ray Morello, Amanda F., the war over pineapple on pizza is a distraction from the elder gods, TimonTomato, Aroara N, Morgan, Nadeem Cassander, Fiona Cartwright, Meg Petz, LocalDogMom, Alana Haber, Emily Peterson, Sam Blackman, bluehatted, Sam Toby, man door hand hook car door, Lindsey Johnson, Marg McGinnis, Arthur Stjerne, Sam Vest, Jessi Pitts, Emily Apples, Maria Lund, timkonbart, Shell Stowell, fromgloriousjupiter, indiana elepaio, Cerulean Cheesecake, Eli Davis, Sophie Sloane, Laura, Aiden Parziani, Angela Spatz, Simon Panitpakdi Jones, Ian Doherty, Amy Wain, braxxyn, Feather, Kira S, Stag. If you'd like to join them visit www.patreon.com/rustyquill
    Edited by Nico Vettese, Elizabeth Moffatt; Brock Winstead & Alexander J Newall
    Written by Jonathan Sims and
    Directed by Alexander J Newall
    Produced by Lowri Ann Davies
    Sensitivity consultation by Alexander Linde Nielsen
    Performances: "The Archivist" - Jonathan Sims; "Martin Blackwood" - Alexander J. Newall; "Melanie King" - Lydia Nicholas; "Georgie Barker" - Sasha Sienna.
    Sound effects this week by 14F_NetusilovaKristyna, aarom, ahur1976, alienistcog, Alivvie, altfuture, Anthousai, BeeProductive, bertiehs, bevibeldesign, BOBtheROSS, bsmacbride, carlito62, CGEffex, Closetwalrus, coltures, conleec, constructabeat, Darsycho, DickBlox, emf26509, FlashTrauma, florianreichelt, Halleck, InspectorJ, Islabonita, joe_anderson22, juanlamillap, julius_galla, JustInvoke, klankbeeld, kyles, meggiepie, meimeibuchikafei, mitchanary, MootMcnoodles, nmarciniegasm, OBCT, OK8, omgbong, patchytherat, Paul368, pfranzen, PickleJones, pushkin, qubodup, Sandermotions, Sauron974, ScreenplayTheater, signtoast, SpliceSound, SteveMannella, sturmankin, Taira Komori, TheDweebMan, tmkappelt, tompallant, Yuval, Jickle, black_trillium, Glitchedtones, Daphne_in_Wonderland, michorvath, vdr3, klangfabrik, Astounded & previously credited artists via freesound.org Additional sound effects from www.zapsplat.com Music  - Great One Step by the Victor Dance Orchestra, approx 1906-1910, available from the Free Music Archive: freemusicarchive.org/music/Vi...
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  • Розваги

КОМЕНТАРІ • 121

  • @a_jae_doe
    @a_jae_doe 9 місяців тому +167

    I love Melanie calling her eye stabbing a messy divorce 😂

  • @Vernrot
    @Vernrot 2 роки тому +891

    i have been waiting to hear “ceaseless watcher’s special little boy” for 189 episodes

    • @lel1160
      @lel1160 2 роки тому +81

      i thought it was just a fucking meme ! when i tell you i screamed

  • @ButterflyColors
    @ButterflyColors Рік тому +518

    Imagine the epic showdown between Jon and Elias is just a staring contest

    • @cupcaketv5673
      @cupcaketv5673 11 місяців тому +13

      Almost reminds me a little of the battle between Morpheus and Lucifer (Sandman, at least in the TV show)

    • @jennifermems1111
      @jennifermems1111 7 місяців тому +26

      Can't wait for Jon to bring out his trump card by shoving a mirror in Elias' face.

  • @DaybreakTownGSA
    @DaybreakTownGSA 3 роки тому +816

    I love how Jon hates poems, but at some point all of these statements become slam poetry

    • @shreddedcheese2659
      @shreddedcheese2659 9 місяців тому +6

      Okay i have to ask. Wtf is slam poetry

    • @kotanamii3358
      @kotanamii3358 8 місяців тому +16

      @@shreddedcheese2659 It's hard to explain but it's just kind of poetry written to be spoken or performed I guess? It would probably be more useful to look up examples tbh

    • @shreddedcheese2659
      @shreddedcheese2659 8 місяців тому

      @@kotanamii3358 áh thnaks

    • @jennifermems1111
      @jennifermems1111 7 місяців тому +5

      @@shreddedcheese2659 The best explanation I can explain it is that is spoken word poetry, but done competitively. I think it was one of the precursors of rapping.

  • @someoneawesome8717
    @someoneawesome8717 3 роки тому +608

    "Ceaseless Watcher's Special Little Boy" lol

    • @kellanlevi5663
      @kellanlevi5663 2 роки тому +33

      I saw someone selling booty shorts that say that and I'm kind of floored that it came straight from canon

  • @Maskami
    @Maskami 3 роки тому +537

    ah, the worst fears of the bourgeois. looking at poor people.

    • @mimkyodar
      @mimkyodar 3 роки тому +43

      The fear they might realise the power they truly wield and strike them down.

    • @NoConsequenc3
      @NoConsequenc3 2 роки тому +7

      How did you manage to miss the point this hard, Maskami?

    • @yumiendercat3685
      @yumiendercat3685 2 роки тому +9

      Truly a terrifying thing

    • @aubarlowe
      @aubarlowe 2 роки тому +12

      Sir Billiam agrees with you wholeheartedly

    • @kellanlevi5663
      @kellanlevi5663 2 роки тому +23

      @@NoConsequenc3 how did you manage to miss the joke this hard, Mx. Lain?

  • @rorygiambalvo2955
    @rorygiambalvo2955 2 роки тому +401

    The parallel between Jon and the Minister is choice. And you KNOW Jon doesn't pay attention to his blood sugar and regularly passes out from exhaustion and lack of proper meals. You go gals, you get yourself a cult. I'm glad they were able to rescue people as they travelled, though now I'm thinking about what it would look like if Jon and Martin had done the same, and just had this mass congregation following them around the UK. I think part of Jon would've really enjoyed it.

    • @candadismycountry
      @candadismycountry Рік тому +25

      I know I'm late but I don't think Jon and Martin could've properly rescue people from the other domains. They could've turned them all into avatars, sure, but that would mean they too would need to feed on the fear of others, which makes it hard to plan a rebellion. The only reason Melanie and Georgie were able to take people out of their own hells was because the tunnels kept the eye from dragging them back to torture.

    • @Badficwriter
      @Badficwriter 14 днів тому

      ..I cannot imagine a worse take than "You go gals, you get yourself a cult."

  • @Cieges
    @Cieges Рік тому +193

    YESSSSS MELANIE AND GEORGIE. I’m gonna tell you rn. You cannot kill either of them. YOU CANNOT JON SIMS

  • @lelandbecker3233
    @lelandbecker3233 2 роки тому +206

    i always feel like
    SoMbOdYs WaTcHiN' mEeEEEEEee

  • @bridgetb.7965
    @bridgetb.7965 3 роки тому +385

    ugh, the statement in this episode is so good and so pointed! jon's starting to get cold feet thinking about the implications of what he's trying to do and how much of a chance he has at succeeding and whether he really even wants to, and then monologues about a politician with good intentions watching his colleagues slide into corruption and inaction and feeling the pull to do so as well. also this episode has some v good lines. the others razzing jon about his victorian maiden fainting spells and 'the ceaseless watcher's special little boy' are both good, but my favourite is this exchange:
    melanie: it's fine, georgie. you can use the "c" word.
    martin: (confused, mildly scanalized) e-excuse me??

    • @nemnyoom
      @nemnyoom 3 роки тому +14

      no point in me commenting when you've said it all already

    • @cupcaketv5673
      @cupcaketv5673 11 місяців тому +11

      "A cult"
      "O-Ohhh... kay?"

  • @calamity2383
    @calamity2383 Рік тому +120

    19:29 for The Ceaseless Watcher’s Special Little Boy

  • @CamilleChauTempsDesCerises
    @CamilleChauTempsDesCerises 5 місяців тому +22

    "No tape recorders" as if my boy could choose to have them or not

  • @pyrosianheir
    @pyrosianheir 3 роки тому +253

    I can't help but giggle a bit at this one, with the "Peers" pun in the midst of Eye Central.

  • @tanisnewby5380
    @tanisnewby5380 Рік тому +150

    "Martin - " "Don't 'MARTIN' me!"
    Jon, can't you *please* just call him "babe" or something I mean jsfoiqrjhgrgfrgjhfsss

  • @taymarkey4329
    @taymarkey4329 Рік тому +49

    everyone loves jealous/petty Martin, but angry Martin adds like 5 years to my life

  • @LeisaTheGreat
    @LeisaTheGreat 2 роки тому +135

    the fact that we're in act three now stresses me out SO MUCH

  • @KenKen3593
    @KenKen3593 2 роки тому +108

    Eric Delano: I quit my job to spend more time with my son, not to help create a post-apocalyptic lesbian power couple.

    • @biancamlf288
      @biancamlf288 Рік тому +25

      Hmm, no. Our boy Eric would be rooting our girlies on. I feel like he'd be proud of anyone who quit.

  • @cezar3169
    @cezar3169 3 роки тому +283

    yeahhh, finally this ep came out I really missed Melanie and Georgie. Congrats on them staying together even with the shit show going on around them

  • @melshinta2966
    @melshinta2966 3 роки тому +142

    I can't express ENOUGH how much I LOVE the soundscaping for this series

  • @Dee-jp7ek
    @Dee-jp7ek 7 місяців тому +10

    I love hearing Martin just be so done at the begining. His little outburst gives me life.

  • @imalittlelady
    @imalittlelady Рік тому +58

    I’ve been wondering…what if ppl did blind themselves now?? Would they also be immune to the eye like Melanie, or is it too late?

    • @racoon_in_ankhmorpork
      @racoon_in_ankhmorpork Рік тому +21

      I’m guessing they’d eventually heal if they blinded themselves now. Maybe they’d be out of it for a bit, just until their eyes… “grow” back? Idk, I’m just theorising here, lol.

    • @imalittlelady
      @imalittlelady Рік тому +10

      @@racoon_in_ankhmorpork I think that’ll make sense, but in the tunnels, yes? They eye can’t reach em to heal em…

    • @Matheus-ql7mn
      @Matheus-ql7mn 6 місяців тому +5

      I think it wouldn't help. Melanie was blood bounded to the eye, she had an entity that claimed her as its own, and *then* got rid of the think that connected her to it. That way, she's untouchable to any entity.
      The rest of people are still linked to all entities, so even if they free themselves from The Eye, the rest still can have them.

  • @dandeliondaffodyls1426
    @dandeliondaffodyls1426 Рік тому +46

    I love being this far into the plot but it's sad that it'll all be over soon 😭

    • @Marco_Polo360
      @Marco_Polo360 3 місяці тому +2

      THINK AGAIN GOOD FELLOW. THE MAGNUS PROTOCOL IS IN TOWN

  • @kaydeejohnson2028
    @kaydeejohnson2028 8 місяців тому +10

    The war over pineapple on pizza is a distraction from the elder gods

  • @Companion92
    @Companion92 2 роки тому +56

    So happy to got to see more of Melanie and Georgie. They seem to be holding up really good

  • @cyrilltate7065
    @cyrilltate7065 Рік тому +13

    The Eye really did say eat the rich, huh

  • @_kai2702
    @_kai2702 2 роки тому +58

    another chance to read more of jonnys writing??? of course I'm gonna get the book, sign me right up.

  • @fletcher8210
    @fletcher8210 2 роки тому +62

    Lesbian cult. I am HERE for it

    • @TheGoauldApophis
      @TheGoauldApophis 2 роки тому +3

      Do they count as lesbians if Georgie is bi?

    • @fletcher8210
      @fletcher8210 2 роки тому +6

      @@TheGoauldApophis Hmmm. You’re correct. Sapphic Cult??

  • @jydeosaure6564
    @jydeosaure6564 3 роки тому +103

    I want the book so bad, i love this episode of the archives as well, as always everything is great

    • @amniamin22
      @amniamin22 3 роки тому

      ...there's a book?

    • @jydeosaure6564
      @jydeosaure6564 3 роки тому +10

      @@amniamin22 jonny wrote a book, not about the archives but i rlly want the book, i havent had anything good to reaf lately

    • @amniamin22
      @amniamin22 3 роки тому

      @@jydeosaure6564 Ooh yes 13 Stories! I realllllly want it too!!!

    • @FH-rp6zs
      @FH-rp6zs 3 роки тому +7

      I just got 13 Storeys (it's a pun) in audiobook form, and I am excited.

    • @amniamin22
      @amniamin22 3 роки тому

      @@FH-rp6zs awesomeee

  • @midnights2631
    @midnights2631 Рік тому +23

    I'm happy Georgie and Melanie are back! I hope they don't blame Jon.

    • @Badficwriter
      @Badficwriter 14 днів тому

      Of course they do. Melanie started in on him immediately and Georgie started doing that "I know better because he's my ex and I know better about tape recorders too" patronizing tone. And Jon just took on this cringing, apologetic tone of the constantly browbeat.

  • @sornyeilevente973
    @sornyeilevente973 2 роки тому +51

    Oh joy Melanie and Georgie I so didn't miss these two. Well hope the Admiral's still fine

  • @Ace_Up_My_Sleeve
    @Ace_Up_My_Sleeve 3 роки тому +45

    I'm caught up on youtube! Oh no!! The end is near. Oh no
    Well then... I'm gonna head over to the website, because I have to know what happens to the Ceaseless Watcher's special little boy next. The Eye compels me. I need to know!
    Anyways, wish me luck!

  • @LVoidtheEndless
    @LVoidtheEndless 3 роки тому +31

    Tim Meredith at 10:57

    • @amphitritemists4595
      @amphitritemists4595 3 роки тому +4

      Thank you I just came to check after the creators quizzed

  • @elliottgaylord6212
    @elliottgaylord6212 3 роки тому +42

    Capitalism Will Kill Us All, part [redacted]

  • @Lubenskii
    @Lubenskii 3 роки тому +24

    Hey I heard Tim Meredith was in this one!

  • @faxonii
    @faxonii 3 роки тому +59

    [CLICK]
    [FOOTSTEPS, AGAINST THE BACKGROUND HUM OF THE SURVEILLANCE ENVIRONMENT, AS THEY APPROACH THE PANOPTICON]
    MARTIN
    This is it, then.
    ARCHIVIST
    This is what?
    MARTIN
    Don’t play dumb.
    It’s the final battle, right? We climb the tower, take out the bad guy, figure out how to change the world back, and back in time for tea.
    Right?
    ARCHIVIST
    We’ve certainly got the audience for it.
    MARTIN
    Yeah. They did roll out the red carpet, didn’t they? Must be nice getting the star treatment.
    ARCHIVIST
    I’d hardly call flooding Oxford Street with blood, the “star treatment”.
    MARTIN
    Oh no? What would you call it?
    ARCHIVIST
    A very lazy metaphor.
    MARTIN
    Wow, you’re really determined not to engage aren’t you?
    ARCHIVIST
    I’m just nervous. Jonah Magnus is waiting at the top of this tower, and he obviously knows we’re coming.
    MARTIN
    I mean, yeah, okay, but -
    ARCHIVIST
    And not only that, every eye in an entire city made of nothing but eyes is staring at me while I try to prepare.
    [AN AMUSED SNORT FROM MARTIN]
    What?
    MARTIN
    [Amused] Seriously? Stage fright? The great Archivist, master of all he surveys can’t handle a bit of public attention?
    ARCHIVIST
    Well, clearly not.
    I’m more comfortable actually doing the looking.
    MARTIN
    [Sarcastic] Oh, I’m so sorry John, I didn’t realise. God forbid you get uncomfortable. I guess I’ll just tell everyone it’s off then, shall I? We’ll just go.
    ARCHIVIST
    You don’t need to be sarcastic, okay?
    MARTIN
    You’re right, I’m sorry. If it’s any consolation, I’m scared too.
    ARCHIVIST
    That’s what concerns me.
    MARTIN
    I don’t follow?
    ARCHIVIST
    What if our fear is feeding him? Making him stronger?
    MARTIN
    But you’re with The Eye too, though, right? So, maybe it’s making you stronger as well.

    John?
    ARCHIVIST
    [Softly] No, you’re… you’re right. Of course you’re right. I can’t believe I didn’t consider it before…
    MARTIN
    John? Use your words.
    ARCHIVIST
    Me vs Elias, Jonah. We… We both draw power from The Eye.
    MARTIN
    Well yeah, obviously.
    ARCHIVIST
    No but - That - There’s - I mean, if we face off, try to destroy each other, it’s not like it’s going to be an actual fight -
    MARTIN
    Hey! Don’t talk like that, okay, we can take him!
    ARCHIVIST
    No, Martin, listen, what I’m saying is that whichever way you cut it, ultimately it just comes down to who The Eye chooses.
    MARTIN
    So what, it’s just a, an eldritch popularity contest?
    ARCHIVIST
    Yes. Except one of the contestants is also planning to try and murder the judge.
    MARTIN

    Um.
    [Searchingly] Maybe it hasn’t realised?
    ARCHIVIST
    Martin I… I don’t see any way I can win this. Not now, not like this.
    MARTIN
    [Spluttering a bit] Well, hang on, hang on, okay, let’s think about this a moment. You’re making a load of assumptions here. You can’t see inside, remember? We have no idea what’s happening up there.
    ARCHIVIST
    You’re right, meaning we have no idea what he’s got planned for us.
    MARTIN
    [Frustrated] Yeah, but that was always going to be the case, wasn’t it?
    Wait, where are you going?
    [FOOTSTEPS AS THE ARCHIVIST BACKS AWAY]
    ARCHIVIST
    We shouldn’t have come.
    MARTIN
    Oh, yeah, sure! We should just go with one of all those other options that we have hidden up our sleeves, yeah?
    ARCHIVIST
    Martin…
    MARTIN
    [Growing angry] No, d-d-don’t “Martin” me, okay! We’re here because it’s this or nothing, right?
    ARCHIVIST
    Right.
    MARTIN
    And we can’t do nothing, right?
    ARCHIVIST
    Right.
    MARTIN
    Great. So, lead on.

    John?
    ARCHIVIST
    Um.
    MARTIN
    Where’s the door. John? How do we get inside this monstrosity?
    ARCHIVIST
    I, uh… Hm.
    MARTIN
    You don’t know?
    ARCHIVIST
    I’m, I’m not sure.
    [SOUND OF EXASPERATED MARTIN]
    MARTIN
    Something’s probably blocking you…
    ARCHIVIST
    Maybe. Maybe The Eye doesn’t actually want me in there. Or, or it’s something Jonah Magnus put in place, or…
    MARTIN
    Or?
    ARCHIVIST
    Or…
    MARTIN
    [Sternly] Or?
    ARCHIVIST
    Or maybe I can’t bring myself to look. Maybe I don’t actually want to go inside.
    MARTIN
    [Harshly] For god’s sake John!
    ARCHIVIST
    I’m sorry.
    MARTIN
    [Suppressed anger] No it’s -
    [More calmly] I get it. It’s fine. Maybe there’s another way in? What’s this thing made of anyway, like, like, obsidian or something, right?
    ARCHIVIST
    One-way mirrored glass.
    MARTIN
    Of course it is. Well, if it’s just glass, then it won’t be hard to break, right? We can just grab something heavy, like one of these cameras, and then all I need…
    ARCHIVIST
    Oh, I wouldn’t.
    [MARTIN GRABS SOMETHING AND THERE IS A WET, FLESHY AND YET PNEUMATIC-LIKE SOUND]
    MARTIN
    Oh! Oh! Eurgh…
    [MARTIN GAGS]
    ARCHIVIST
    [Softly] Warned you.
    MARTIN
    [Raging] Brilliant! Just brilliant!
    [GLASS IS KICKED, MULTIPLE TIMES, AND SOMETHING METALLIC ROLLS AWAY]
    Argh! Damnit!
    ARCHIVIST
    (Quietly) Martin…
    MARTIN
    What?
    ARCHIVIST
    Look, just… just give me… Let me try to focus, tune out all these watchers. I-I’ve got a statement to make anyway.
    MARTIN
    Already?
    ARCHIVIST
    [Tired] Yes. There’s a lot here, Martin. A lot.
    MARTIN
    [Harshly] Fine… fine.
    [More calmly] I’ll do a lap of the base. See if I can find any way in through any of the bits that used to be the Institute.
    ARCHIVIST
    Just be careful, okay?
    MARTIN
    Yeah, alright. Don’t worry about me.
    Besides if anything happens… at least there’s plenty of witnesses.
    ARCHIVIST
    That’s not funny.
    MARTIN
    No.
    [MARTIN SIGHS]
    Be back soon.
    [BRISK FOOTSTEPS AS THE SURVEILLANCE WHIRRING GETS A BIT LOUDER AND TWO SPOTLIGHTS KA-CHONK ON]
    ARCHIVIST
    Right, here’s your bloody performance…

    • @faxonii
      @faxonii 3 роки тому +16

      [STATIC RISES]
      [URBAN SOUNDS, LIKE A BUSY STREET]
      [FOOTSTEPS PROCEED]
      ARCHIVIST (STATEMENT)
      The minister hurries onwards, his eyes downcast, focusing on anything that breaks the monotony of the street. Cracks in the paving stones, boot-stomped cigarette ends, the mouldering yellow lines that snake along the pavement’s edge. Anything so that he doesn’t have to meet their gaze.
      [FAINT SOUNDS OF COUGHING, SHUFFLING AND CRYING PEOPLE]
      The gaunt and hollow-cheeked figures that stare at him from every corner of this blighted city that might hide them from the chill. Stick-brittle women, dresses covered in second-hand blood; old men bloated from what we sold to them as food, skin discoloured from malnourishment; and the children. God, the children. They won’t stop looking, won’t stop following him with their piteous, desperate gaze that speaks so loudly his knees feel like they will buckle. ‘Help us.’
      He will. Of course he will. He wants to. He hasn’t lied to them, he really hasn’t. He used to be one of them, he remembers what it can be like. He is there to speak for them. And if necessary, he will join them again. The minister grips his black leather briefcase closely to his chest, bile rising in his throat at the sudden jolt of fear that races through his veins. Where did that come from? Is he afraid of it, returning, of that sharp stab of hunger, the shivering of a cold you can’t escape? Or is he afraid that should it come to that, they will see him as a deceiver?
      But he cannot dwell solely on his worries, he tells himself - a sentiment that his journey is proving quite inaccurate. He glances at his watch, trying to hide it from his observers so that they might not see how expensive it is. He’s late, of course. The minister is always late. There are never any taxis, you see. If he was in a car, it would be alright. Then he wouldn’t have to see them, be seen by them. No, that’s not the way to look at it. These are his people, it’s important he stays connected to them. So why does it make him so afraid?
      Before him rises the great shining glass palace, jagged and angular, clear crystal fogged and smeared with sweat and grease and breathy condensation, but still its denizens can be seen by the masses of the starving that crowd around the edges. They cannot help but look inside, begging and weeping and hissing and falling as they wait for somebody, anybody, to stop the things that kill them.
      [DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES, OUTSIDE SOUNDS DISAPPEAR]
      [A FEW MOMENTS SILENCE SAVE FOR FOOTSTEPS, THEN BACKGROUND CLAMOURING AND HUBBUB IS HEARD]
      The minister uses the back entrance; the stale and humid air hits him immediately, the light from the not-a-sun reflected through a dozen layers of glass. The light takes on a crimson tinge as he passes an office dried with gore, and turns away from a back room where three men in fine suits laugh among themselves as they weave their pile of nooses. Time was, the minister thinks, they’d have at least put up a curtain, a token effort to hide their intentions. But now they work in full view, unafraid of what the masses outside may see. Their lies are just as transparent; there is no choice here but to believe.
      Finally, he reaches the chamber, the heart of the wretched place. Though the corridors are hard to navigate in this place of clear walls, you can always follow the sound of blustered roaring, echoing down the way. It gets louder and louder with each step, until the minister crosses the threshold into the great room, and it swallows him whole.
      [THE CLAMOURING BECOMES A LOT LOUDER, A ROWDY DEBATE CHAMBER, AN INDISTINCT RABBLE]
      The two sides scream and hoot and holler at each other, each on their end of the pit of sand, the arena in which they fight. The minister ignores the cobwebs in it as he makes his way to his chair. It is politer not to mention the thick layer of dust that has accumulated on the arena floor.
      He takes his place, marvelling again at how comfortable the seat is, how well it seems to fit, before the memory of the eyes outside, the knowledge that he can still be seen, wipes the contented smile from his face with a jerk. He looks across the divide at his opponents: pale and gurning things that smirk and guffaw and howl. They are content and safe and happy in this place, and only scream so loud from sheer hatred of the idea that any might make noise except themselves. On their thighs can be seen the glint of gold from the great polished nails they have driven through their legs and into the chairs, gangrenous wounds that ensure they shall never have to rise again, their position utterly secure.
      On his side of the arena the shouts should be sharper, more angry, but their tone and pitch are such as to merge seamlessly with the others. There are no golden stakes on this side pinning down his would-be comrades. But the minister must be careful not to look too closely, or else he might see how many of his allies are fused to their own chairs, on which they have sat comfortable for so long.
      His eyes drift away, through the walls to the crowd outside. Their baying cries for justice cannot be heard in here. If any whisper should make it through, it is utterly destroyed in the deafening shouting that surrounds him. But he cannot forget their eyes, watching him, piercing him with their wounded humanity. The minister swallows, and tries to speak over the din.
      At first his words are lost, vanishing into the cacophony without a ripple, but they are words, clear and distinct from the shapeless expostulation of his peers. And as he says them, one by one the others fall silent, their disgusted attention landing on him until his own voice falters in the sudden quiet.
      [GRADUALLY THE VOICES RECEDE AND THE CLAMOUR STOPS]
      Across the pit the pallid things gurn at him in indignant curiosity, while on his side he is surrounded by expressions of horrified betrayal.
      They can all hear him now. Any words he speaks will ring out through the chamber. He wants to talk of the people outside, the bruised and abandoned ones that suffer and die to slake their appetites. He wants to cry for restitution, for justice, for a future, for anything. But all eyes are on him and he falters. He remembers the cold, the hunger, the ache of concrete beneath him. He is afraid. And his chair is so very comfortable. The minister coughs, once, uncomfortably, and sits down.
      [A BELL SOUNDS, FOLLOWED BY SCUTTLING AND SOUNDS OF CROCKERY]
      As he does so the great bell tolls for dinner, and a thousand scuttering servants swarm out and into the chamber, depositing their silver trays before each seat, piled high with succulent, steaming meat.
      [SOUNDS OF CONSUMPTION AND CUTLERY]
      The minister eats as those outside look on, and all he tastes is salt.
      [STATIC RISES, AS OTHER SOUNDS FADE, AND THE PREVIOUS ENVIRONMENT RESUMES]

    • @faxonii
      @faxonii 3 роки тому +12

      MARTIN
      [Brightly] All good?
      ARCHIVIST
      Yes. Just, uh… Left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth.
      MARTIN
      Oh great! Fantastic!
      ARCHIVIST
      Martin? Wh- Something’s up.
      MARTIN
      [Blasé] No! No, nothing’s up. Everything is still awful.
      ARCHIVIST
      Why are you smiling?
      MARTIN
      I’m… just… really happy to see you.
      ARCHIVIST
      Martin?
      MARTIN
      [Loudly] Ah well! Looks like we aren’t getting in here! Never mind! Better… Best head off then, eh?
      ARCHIVIST
      What’s going on?
      MARTIN
      [Hissed whisper] It’s fine, just trust me.
      ARCHIVIST
      Martin, this is the sort of place where acting strange means I will still ju-
      [THE ARCHIVIST EXCLAIMS IN SHOCK AS A HATCH OPENS AND HE IS BUNDLED INSIDE, ACCOMPANIED BY A SHRIEK OF STATIC]
      [HARSH METAL SCRAPE AS THE HATCH IS PULLED BACK INTO PLACE]
      [THE VOCAL REVERB ON THE REST OF THE CONVERSATION INDICATES IT TAKES PLACE IN THE TUNNELS]
      MELANIE
      Shut up!
      GEORGIE
      It’s alright, John. Just keep quiet.
      ARCHIVIST
      Wha- Georgie? Melanie? I thought - This -
      MARTIN
      [Whispering] Sorry. Sorry, John. Not sure how much everything up there actually understood what was going on. But, y’know, I didn’t want to take any chances so it made sense to… um…
      ARCHIVIST
      Put on a show?
      MARTIN
      Yeah, basically, more or less.
      GEORGIE
      Martin says it’s much harder for you to avoid attention up there.
      MELANIE
      Another reason we should have left them up there. Still. Glad you’re alive and that.
      ARCHIVIST
      Likewise, I… oh… Ooo…
      MELANIE
      Oh, I know that sound. He’s going pale, right? Five quid says he’s about to collapse again.
      ARCHIVIST
      [Archly] I am not going to collapse. What do you mean again?
      MELANIE
      Oh come on. You do it all the time.
      ARCHIVIST
      [Brokenly] I do not - I’m just feeling a little bit woozy alright? I ca-can’t quite think straight. Like at, um… um, Martin, you remember?
      GEORGIE
      Is this what you were talking about?
      MARTIN
      Yeah, if something messes with his connection, he can get a little… vague.
      ARCHIVIST
      I don’t like being discussed like I’m not here.
      MELANIE
      Then you are going to love the others.
      MARTIN
      What others?
      GEORGIE
      There’s a small group of… survivors we managed to pull out of some of the nearby hells. They, um… They think we’re… ‘special’. You know, because The Eye can’t see us.
      MELANIE
      It’s fine, Georgie. You can use the “c” word.
      MARTIN
      E-Excuse me?
      GEORGIE
      Fine. We’ve got, sort of a… cult.
      MARTIN
      Wh- Ooooh… kay…
      ARCHIVIST
      That’s… not what I was expecting.
      MELANIE
      Mmhmm. It’s extremely weird.
      GEORGIE
      It wasn’t intentional. It just sort of happened. Although… I have to admit it can be useful, occasionally.
      ARCHIVIST
      Okay, this is, uh… this is a-a lot. Why don’t we take it from the top?
      GEORGIE
      Alright.
      ARCHIVIST
      You’re alive!
      GEORGIE
      Yeah.
      ARCHIVIST
      Good.
      MELANIE
      I keep telling her that technically there’s no proof of that.
      ARCHIVIST
      I’m really glad.
      MARTIN
      Friendly faces have been kind of rare. Or weird.
      ARCHIVIST
      H-How are you here? What, what happened?
      GEORGIE
      When the world started to change, it just didn’t hit me and Melanie. Not, not really.
      MELANIE
      Georgie’s got that fearless thing going on, and me and The Eye, well, you remember our messy divorce.
      ARCHIVIST
      Sure.
      GEORGIE
      We figured you’d know what was going on, so we headed for the Institute, but it was, um, well, you saw it up there. We couldn’t find you, and by the time we arrived the world was full nightmare.
      MELANIE
      There was nowhere to go back to, so I told her about the tunnels. Turns out, not only were they still here, they actually do a decent job of hiding things. When you aren’t painting a huge target on our backs.
      GEORGIE
      Melanie…
      MELANIE
      [Sharply] What? I’m here, aren’t I? I didn’t say anything about being nice about it.
      GEORGIE
      No you didn’t.
      MELANIE
      So… let me moan.
      ARCHIVIST
      I’m sorry to cause a fuss.
      MELANIE
      [Snorts] Bit late for that.
      MARTIN
      How did you know we were there?
      GEORGIE
      How could we not? The entire city knows you were there.
      MELANIE
      [Sarcastically] Everyone is so excited to see the Ceaseless Watcher’s special little boy.
      [GIGGLES]
      ARCHIVIST
      Yes, well.
      GEORGIE
      Always did enjoy being the centre of things.
      [LAUGHS]
      ARCHIVIST
      So, what’s next?
      MARTIN
      Well, I vote we catch up somewhere that’s maybe not quite so close to the sinister mega-tower.
      GEORGIE
      Not so fast. Is it safe? If we take you to the others, is that going to put them in danger?
      MARTIN
      Um. Oh, er…
      ARCHIVIST
      No. No, I don’t think it will.
      MELANIE
      [Intensely] I’m going to hold you to that.
      GEORGIE

      Fine. Come on then.
      MARTIN
      Oh, uh, er, Melanie, do you need a hand or…
      MELANIE
      No. No, I’m fine. Somehow managed to keep my cane through all of this.
      [RATTLES CANE]
      And I know this part of the tunnels pretty well. Besides, do you even have a torch?
      MARTIN
      Oh, uh, no, not anymore, we lost it when -
      MELANIE
      [Sharply] Then I’m not the one with the problem. I’m told it gets pretty dark.
      [FOOTSTEPS HEAD OFF ALONG WITH CANE TAPS]
      [THE ARCHIVIST CHUCKLES]
      GEORGIE
      Oh, and John?
      ARCHIVIST
      Yes?
      GEORGIE
      No tape recorders.
      ARCHIVIST
      Oh, right you are.
      [CLICK]

    • @DungeonMistressC
      @DungeonMistressC 3 роки тому +4

      Thank you!

    • @faxonii
      @faxonii 3 роки тому +2

      @@DungeonMistressC np!!

  • @cringeworthy4755
    @cringeworthy4755 9 місяців тому +3

    We have 10 left.... Oh my Powers, what's gonna happen?

  • @calamity2383
    @calamity2383 Рік тому +10

    He has another book out! It’s called Family Business

    • @biancamlf288
      @biancamlf288 Рік тому +2

      It appears he does, and 320 delicious pages long too.

  • @gamingsnake1769
    @gamingsnake1769 3 роки тому +22

    What's up all you legends?

    • @lelandbecker3233
      @lelandbecker3233 2 роки тому +1

      what IS up, what is down, is the world even real

    • @biancamlf288
      @biancamlf288 Рік тому

      @@lelandbecker3233 The world is somewhere else entirely.

    • @sobble821
      @sobble821 Рік тому

      @@lelandbecker3233 Love your pfp

  • @ANIMAfelis
    @ANIMAfelis 2 місяці тому +1

    Clearly this episode's topic had to be made! Well done, @Rusty Quill!!

  • @dr.zespert
    @dr.zespert 2 роки тому +9

    melanie is a gem

  • @zinganeatsr4011
    @zinganeatsr4011 3 місяці тому +4

    Spooky mlm couple 🤝 Culty wlw couple

  • @waffleartz8581
    @waffleartz8581 Рік тому +7

    MELANIE and GEORGIE MY BELOVES

  • @ihaveausernameformydog2564
    @ihaveausernameformydog2564 Рік тому +24

    You copy every single episode on a VHS tape Cut out all the credits and add a little distortion make it believable and then hide all 200 somewhere or spread it out your choice but at some point in the future someone’s going to get curious someone is going to start playing the tapes someone is going to be incredibly confused

    • @biancamlf288
      @biancamlf288 Рік тому +7

      That sounds like absolute hell. On the flip side, it would keep me entertained for months on end.

    • @ihaveausernameformydog2564
      @ihaveausernameformydog2564 Рік тому

      @@biancamlf288 I can imagine

    • @lordbaphie
      @lordbaphie 11 місяців тому +1

      I'm not having kids but this shall be my heirloom now

  • @Luna-de_azule
    @Luna-de_azule Рік тому +6

    And I bought it...:D

  • @Thomas-wn7cl
    @Thomas-wn7cl 2 роки тому +17

    The only thing scary is the actual poetry.

  • @SugarViv_
    @SugarViv_ Рік тому +3

    I like this statement

  • @moonfall5124
    @moonfall5124 5 місяців тому +1

    Sometimes I really wish I was British… and found this closer to when it came out than 2 years later but oh well

  • @StrangeTheEditor
    @StrangeTheEditor 2 роки тому +8

    Umm. Can somebody explain the Oxford street thing please? I'm not well versed in London culture.

    • @lyx8039
      @lyx8039 Рік тому +1

      Hilltop road is a recurring theme in this I think?

    • @biancamlf288
      @biancamlf288 Рік тому +5

      Not a Brit, but I googled why it would at all be noteworthy, and I could see how it's a lazy metaphor.
      "First for fashion, entertainment, technology and innovation, Oxford Street is the world's biggest high street. It offers 1.5 miles of unrivalled shopping, with more than 90 flagship stores, from fashion and beauty, to tech and homeware. Oxford Street is the ultimate shopping paradise."
      Anti-capitalist podcast gonna anti-capitalist.

  • @takeoats
    @takeoats Рік тому +3

    YEAAH CULT!

  • @horrificreader4084
    @horrificreader4084 3 роки тому +10

    H e l l o

  • @Badficwriter
    @Badficwriter 14 днів тому

    Its a shame Georgie and Melanie are still unbearable. Sigh. Can't wait til Basira shows up and they're all awful TOGETHER.

  • @justjjamn4952
    @justjjamn4952 7 місяців тому

    hmmm... it sure is... _convinent_ that martin get back eight as jon finishes a statment. coincidence? 👀

  • @Watashiwadeus
    @Watashiwadeus 5 місяців тому

    You certainly give British politicians more humanity than they have

  • @ann-margretparke9525
    @ann-margretparke9525 Рік тому +4

    Martin is such a little snot at the beginning.

  • @Lizzy_Stories09
    @Lizzy_Stories09 Місяць тому

    19:30