Black Women, Get Free...3 Steps I'm Taking 👣

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  • Опубліковано 23 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 142

  • @StephaniePerry
    @StephaniePerry  Рік тому +24

    Anybody getting free? Let us know in the comments what steps you took / are taking. 💗

    • @tearialfrierson1613
      @tearialfrierson1613 Рік тому +1

      I always wanted to go Puerto Rico since I was 12 years old. I had a thing for the boy band Menudo. I had the chance to visit San Juan, Puerto Rico last year at the age of 50 for my youngest daughter 14th birthday and my grandson. we had a great time I can't wait to go back again.

    • @easiersaidwithmeg
      @easiersaidwithmeg 11 місяців тому +1

      I’m 31 and I’m child free I will be moving to Costa Rica this year

  • @tianickolemua2355
    @tianickolemua2355 Рік тому +103

    I reject family volunteering me to do things. The manipulation tactics that happen when you refuse is ridiculous. It's also hard to refuse after saying "YES" almost your entire life. I pray for strength on this effort.

    • @WeDontRetireWeAscend_
      @WeDontRetireWeAscend_ Рік тому +19

      You have the right to say "No." You can do it Sis.

    • @serat0947
      @serat0947 Рік тому +12

      If you can't just say "no" give a vague, open answer like "I'm not sure if I'm free...let me check my schedule." My spouse and I use each other as "get out of jail free card". I don't usually have a problem saying no but I like having a plan just in case.

    • @tianickolemua2355
      @tianickolemua2355 Рік тому

      @@serat0947 Thanks I will use my man for the "get out of jail free card"😅

    • @robbincompton7468
      @robbincompton7468 Рік тому +11

      My father passed away. 😔That’s when I realized that this is the only life you get. Use this time doing 99% of things you love, like, & truly want to do. In advance, determine what you will do for others & how much time you’ll devote to it. Simply say: “Let me think about it.” “I won’t be able to do that for you right now or this time”. “That’s not something that I want to do.” “No, thank you.” “Is there anything else I can help you with?” “Maybe, next time.” “No.” After retiring, people will volunteer you for all sorts of jobs.🥴 You will quickly learn how to say no. Yes = I don’t mind taking time from the life that I have left to do this for you.
      Self care. Then help others.

    • @fdoctor79
      @fdoctor79 Рік тому +3

      Amen! Yes and No are complete sentences!

  • @orlettacaldwell
    @orlettacaldwell Рік тому +48

    I reject my job title as my identity.

  • @denisechilds2391
    @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +54

    I'm not explaining myself to anyone (family) any more.... I'm just going to pack and leave......❤,...the (why).....

  • @WeDontRetireWeAscend_
    @WeDontRetireWeAscend_ Рік тому +64

    I am prepared to reject those who think that because I am retired, that I am now obligated to give them my time. 😝

    • @soulsaltinc
      @soulsaltinc Рік тому +5

      Feeling you on this idea! ❤

    • @berlawberlaw1025
      @berlawberlaw1025 Рік тому +5

      So true retire sometimes people are afraid to retire because of what family and friends expect of them.

  • @BrittanyOnABudget
    @BrittanyOnABudget Рік тому +27

    I have recently freed myself from a toxic job where I was making the most I’ve ever made, but it was incredibly damaging to my health. I’m taking the time to heal and unmask the being I’ve been hiding all this time in the name of ‘black excellence.’ Thank you so much, Stephanie, for sharing this beautiful message with us and creating this community!!

  • @bbills4186
    @bbills4186 Рік тому +25

    On my current job, I was asked the question about moving up to the next level, there are people younger than me competing for it. I just turned 55, and I have already been there done that. I don't feel the need to compete anymore for anything. I am already retired in my head, even though I have about 7 years left before I am even eligible for retirement. My ultimate goal is not to dig in deeper into corporate life, but do a gradual withdrawal from it in plain sight, while working on getting into a life of freedom, travel and reflection. Will take more time out this weekend to review Stephanie's content in depth and develop the framework for my journey away from this rat race someone else created.

  • @charlesettahaywood8623
    @charlesettahaywood8623 Рік тому +46

    People expect my time because I am single!

  • @Bethstr
    @Bethstr Рік тому +47

    I reject giving power to others opinions. With how I do life or who I am. 🙌🏾

    • @soulsaltinc
      @soulsaltinc Рік тому +1

      Good one! Yes🎉

    • @TamikoRWhite
      @TamikoRWhite Рік тому +1

      Have you noticed the plethora of videos discouraging black female solo travelers? Hateful people don't want to see us explore the world and open up our options🥺

    • @glidkomer
      @glidkomer Рік тому

      ​@@TamikoRWhite Really? I haven't seen a single one.

    • @TamikoRWhite
      @TamikoRWhite Рік тому

      @@glidkomer
      Oh yes. It's like there is an agenda to keep us black ladies from taking the road less traveled. 🥺

    • @Bethstr
      @Bethstr Рік тому +2

      Some people don’t see the value in traveling as much as perhaps this community does. But that’s okay, because we’re going to do it any ways. ☺️

  • @sandraholmes4541
    @sandraholmes4541 Рік тому +6

    I reject always being expected to be someone’s caregiver. Most of my life as a teenager and adult life was spent taking care of my parents who got sick in their thirties. I did not finish high school because of this, although I got my GED and college degree much later on. I never had much of a life of my own. My parents are no longer here, and I am currently constantly asked to be someone’’s PCA. I do what I can to help out, but I am expected to always be around, even though I work full time. I have been researching moving to Puerto Rico, and to eventually go to Costa Rica. I want to travel and see/experience the world. I am single with no kids, and some in my inner circle think that I should just sit down and be a full time caregiver to some of my elderly friends. I want to be free, and live life for a change, instead of working my butt off and putting other people’s needs ahead of my own. I want to actually live, instead of just existing and being sick and tired, literally.

  • @breannabranch3014
    @breannabranch3014 Рік тому +14

    I'm rejecting the fear of disappointing my Mom, as i get older, I've realized that just about all of my decisions are affected by what my family, but more importantly what my mom thinks about whatever ideas I have my own thoughts about. They make me feel like im wrong for not wanting to continue to struggle while working non-stop. When i talk about my thoughts about moving overseas or backpacking around for a while, Im told that I'm running from "life". I just don't think it's worth it anymore 😔

    • @iamthediapora
      @iamthediapora 6 місяців тому

      It all worked out when I stopped talking and started walking (or flying) away!

  • @zerubabel777
    @zerubabel777 Рік тому +31

    Hi Stephanie! I am rejecting other people’s expectations that I devote most of my time to the cultivation of their dreams instead of my own. 👏🏽

  • @josettecompton7448
    @josettecompton7448 Рік тому +31

    Thank you so much for this, Stephanie. Today has been a mentally exhausting work day, and I was relapsing into the Black excellence trope. But watching this gave me hope, after a 10 hour work day.

  • @Mari-Ama7
    @Mari-Ama7 Рік тому +45

    I give respect to Stephanie & all the black women who have stepped back from overworking & being stressed out! I give credit & congratulations to all you Black Women!!! Do your thing ❤

  • @TamikoRWhite
    @TamikoRWhite Рік тому +15

    Stephanie Perry your channel is the bomb😊
    💣. Its the beginning of the new expat movement of black ladies, and more black women are traveling overseas and embracing ease, leisure, comfort.😁.
    So many of us black ladies are walking off the plantation of pain, poverty, and struggle love. The world is our oyster and its ours for the taking🌍✈️🚶🏿‍♀️🧳

  • @TracyUnplugged
    @TracyUnplugged 11 місяців тому +3

    I REJECTED my family’s expectations of me 4 Years ago, and it was THE MOST freeing thing I could have EVER done. Thank you, Stephanie, for this community of beautiful, intelligent, and FREE women. ❤❤❤

  • @Candicelistens
    @Candicelistens Рік тому +15

    I began by defining my core values, strenghs, and priorities. I make decisions that are aligned to those predetermined values, strenghs, and priorities. It simplifies my decision making and supports my personal freedom

  • @kimberlycrockett
    @kimberlycrockett Рік тому +17

    Hi Stephanie! I'm rejecting the expectation that my time and energy should be spent making other peoples' lives more comfortable. I'm turning 50 this year and I've lived abroad for 13 years and people are always trying to change my mind about how I choose to live my life. But I will continue to do what's best for me and support others in the ways I choose to.
    Also, when it comes to books, I am definitely your girl. I LOVE books and I have read (or listened to) over 750 non-fiction books! Soon, I will start creating content on UA-cam to share the insights and wisdom from these books that have helped me along my journey to live a life I love. There is so much to be learned from books and Black women can definitely benefit from sharing our learnings with each other.
    Thanks for sharing and bringing our community together!

  • @chidenisee
    @chidenisee Рік тому +10

    I took a break from work for 3 years but I was a SAHM so that was just unpaid work. I plan on going overseas for a month with my son and just travel and chill. I am tired and it's not from him but my other family responsibilities. I am rejecting other people volunteering me for stuff that does not appeal to me or stuff I just don't want to do.

  • @JabouJ.
    @JabouJ. Рік тому +30

    I’m 30 and didn’t imagine life being like this…I don’t usually comment but I’m watching this video after balling my eyes out after my unemployment has exhausted and currently still not securing work. I had a good paying job that I was working SO HARD in and was laid off back in June 2023. I’m feeling so down on myself that after all my hard work and calculated risk...still it feels like it’s not enough… I want to feel good about the work that I do or at least not hate it.. I need some help with my next steps but I’m struggling right now…I hate what this country has done to black woman and today I’m truly feeling it 😥😥😥😥😥

    • @LifeUnfilltered
      @LifeUnfilltered Рік тому +10

      Definitely delve into the content here on UA-cam. Freedom is possible/ Wishing you the best.

    • @denisechilds2391
      @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +6

      Hugs and prayers, I'm still working, but exhausted, I have to rest, and you should rest as well, one thing for certain and 2 things for sure when one door closes another one opens....God got you, and(us).... sending hugs, love, and prayers ❤

    • @tinawest8350
      @tinawest8350 Рік тому +6

      Hi, I'm rejecting what others have to say about me wanting to traveling solo. I'm going to Mexico next week and this is me telling everybody I'm not scared, the Lord has got my back and I will be fine. I pray that we all get to do the things we desire and have the funds to enjoy them. God bless!

    • @JabouJ.
      @JabouJ. Рік тому

      @@LifeUnfilltered thank you ❤️

    • @JabouJ.
      @JabouJ. Рік тому

      @@denisechilds2391 thank you ❤️

  • @verrellsmith6995
    @verrellsmith6995 Рік тому +20

    Rejecting emotional and mental abuse from my mother and my husband.

  • @mjaye1712
    @mjaye1712 Рік тому +25

    I gave up doing the most to be "understanding" and "amenable" of difficult situations or people. I have embraced maximum ease and flow in my ease and flow. 😊

    • @mjaye1712
      @mjaye1712 Рік тому +4

      I also rejected busyness. I do as little as possible. I love having large blocks of time to simply mosey.

    • @mariono244
      @mariono244 Рік тому

      This is a conclusion for me

    • @eternalabundance39
      @eternalabundance39 Рік тому

      ​@@mjaye1712that's awesome

  • @batk0427
    @batk0427 Рік тому +6

    My family's religion. I reject that! But that doesn't mean I am not spiritual.

  • @margaretw5848
    @margaretw5848 Рік тому +4

    I’m freeing myself from so much volunteering my time helping with community activities. Quit quitting by not being available when contacted to help. Been volunteering since my youth. I’ve paid my dues

  • @kailisanderson6686
    @kailisanderson6686 11 місяців тому +2

    People expect me to make sense of their confusing statements. I reject that. Now I say, “I don’t understand what you’re saying/asking/whatever, can you say/ask that differently?” Or “I don’t understand how that connects to our current discussion.” I used to try to figure it out and then respond. No more.

  • @garden4mysoul397
    @garden4mysoul397 Рік тому +6

    Hi Stephanie I am so loving the free black woman and I'm making my plan!!! Thanks for the encouragement!! Best wishes

  • @donnahogan2999
    @donnahogan2999 Рік тому +1

    I just returned from Cabo San Lucas. I thanked you once again for your encouragement. I also rejected being a God mother and allowing family to move in with me. Setting boundaries not because I’m not honored, but I no longer want to wear the super hero cape. Thank you 🤟🏿

  • @TheBizeediva
    @TheBizeediva Рік тому +3

    I'm getting free... My mindset has changed, and I'm "throwing things off." Thank you for what you do.

  • @rorenee5245
    @rorenee5245 Рік тому +3

    When someone says something that doesn’t resonate with me or my values or goals, esp. if they attempt to give unsolicited feedback on my life/choices, I literally say, 'So, I rebuke that...'
    Instead of arguing, reasoning, convincing, I seek to conserve my precious energy. Sometimes I slip in that rebuke so smoothly and gracefully,...and pick up right where i left off...lbs.

  • @RebloomRoom
    @RebloomRoom Рік тому +9

    Thank you so much, Stephanie, for sharing our Mexico retreat! @wellsideretreats and I are looking forward to relaxing and exploring with like-minded women this spring 😊 I am getting free by exploring Mexico this winter 🇲🇽

  • @JasenomadeTV
    @JasenomadeTV Рік тому +3

    I stopped and rejected putting everyone before me and stopped trying to be the perfect wife and I started living my life, travelling alone and not waiting for my husband to want to travel with me... liberating x

  • @dandelionsden
    @dandelionsden 11 місяців тому +2

    I reject feeling guilty for protecting my peace

  • @madamelogicbombdropperblac7799
    @madamelogicbombdropperblac7799 11 місяців тому +1

    BLACK WOMEN!
    Step 1. Walk off the plantation of pain, poverty, and struggle love.
    Step 2. Take the road less traveled ( get your US Passport and start traveling and find your new home overseas).
    3. Never look back no matter what.
    Thank you Stephanie Perry😊
    You are such a an inspiration🥳

  • @lisamichelle5238
    @lisamichelle5238 11 місяців тому +2

    I rejected how I was being treated and discriminated against at my full-time job and apparently that mental rejection is what manifested them relieving me of my duties. Key word relieve because that's how I felt after the initial disdain I felt knowing their reasons were not justified. They actually did me a favor because I wanted to resign in the next 4-6 weeks anyway and I don't plan to work for anyone else again (definitely not on a full-time basis). I've gotten so much done over the past week for MYSELF for a change and am excited to begin the next phase of my journey.

  • @rose4u111
    @rose4u111 Рік тому +10

    Excellent content, Stephanie. I believe another form of freedom is rejecting His-story and seeking history that is more in line with actual BLACK/AFRICAN history. This is an ongoing process, but mentally freeing indeed!☝🏾

    • @TamikoRWhite
      @TamikoRWhite Рік тому

      Not since the great migration that occured at the turn of the 20th century are we going to see a mass Exodus of black women. And as we travel the world WE ARE GOING TO CREATE AND WRITE OUR OWN HER-STORY🌍🚶🏿‍♀️🧳✈️😉

    • @NebulasOnyx
      @NebulasOnyx Рік тому

      Yup. All a lie. BM purposely try to erase our real history from before they even existed

  • @sophiagreene
    @sophiagreene Рік тому +5

    Subscribing to one way of life for “family” that we never see or using the excuse of having children to not pursue your dreams/goals.

  • @denicagilmer7951
    @denicagilmer7951 Рік тому +6

    Expectations from other people about taking another promotional exam. I don’t want to invest my time and money.

  • @christinew.8181
    @christinew.8181 Рік тому +1

    I reject doing something just because someone asks me to do it. I do what only I can do. Someone else can do the rest.

  • @Gft2852
    @Gft2852 Рік тому +2

    Restructuring my life to get free and do all of these things. Thank you for these great reminders and tips. It always feels like listening to a sister when you share these encouragements.❤

  • @TheJoyceTV
    @TheJoyceTV 11 місяців тому +1

    I reject feeling guilty for saying NO!

  • @agnescampbell7692
    @agnescampbell7692 Рік тому +1

    I’m a lifelong bookworm, myself. I agree…books are a wealth of knowledge and inspiration. 😊

  • @denisechilds2391
    @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +5

    Still working my goal daily....being focused and mindful on my coin ❤

  • @Gft2852
    @Gft2852 Рік тому +1

    In the process of restructuring my life so I can fully do all these things. Thank you, hearing your reminders is always like listening to a sister. ❤

  • @BlackandBlessed100
    @BlackandBlessed100 7 місяців тому

    I’m rejecting hard work- giving my time money and energy to my family
    No More ❤

  • @eternalabundance39
    @eternalabundance39 Рік тому +1

    I am in the process of freeing myself ❤

  • @OnyanaRosa
    @OnyanaRosa 11 місяців тому +1

    That cabinet behind you is gorgeous!

    • @sarayap6635
      @sarayap6635 11 місяців тому +1

      YES! It is so attractive! I thought it was just me lol

  • @edithdonaldson9483
    @edithdonaldson9483 Рік тому +2

    Hi Stephanie and Sis-Stars💫, Yes I enjoyed "A Renaissance of Our Own' by Rachel C. Black Women Booking It book club hosted by Tori Prophet and moderator Jennifer Covington has been eye and soul opening. This book club was formed bc many women in Exodus Summit said it would be great to have a black womens book group. Life does get life-ing but many of us have enjoyed, read, and discussed these books.
    1. A Renaissance of Our Own. by Rachel Cargle 2. Pause Rest Be. by Octavia F. Raheem. 3. Current Book is Sisterhood Heals by Joy Harden Bradford, PhD. Were meeting via Zoom 💖February 1, 2024 for Book Club Night . I hope you all can join us.
    Black Women Booking It

  • @ashpiredliving
    @ashpiredliving Рік тому +7

    LOVING THESE TWISTS ❤❤❤GORGIE

  • @lashunburton657
    @lashunburton657 10 місяців тому

    Rejecting that I am strong and capable to handle everything without help.

  • @FreeBWIC
    @FreeBWIC Рік тому +1

    Yay, Stephanie!! The book. 🎉🎉 So exciting and happy.

  • @jaderoyale-brown
    @jaderoyale-brown Рік тому

    I look forward to getting back out there to solo travel, especially out the country. I’ve been traveling in the U.S. since 7 years old at the time ❤

  • @haveaniceday2229
    @haveaniceday2229 Рік тому +4

    I absolutely LOVE this video and ALLLL the videos you do! It's always refreshing to see you and hear what you have to say.

  • @jaderoyale-brown
    @jaderoyale-brown Рік тому

    I love that I can now say NO and don’t feel as bad as I use to. I’m a work in progress.

  • @VoyageHER
    @VoyageHER 11 місяців тому

    I am definitely freeing myself from society's expectations. I'm tired of worrying about what people are going to think of me if I say or do certain things. They can think anything they want at this point as long as I'm enjoying my life

  • @courtneylovely111
    @courtneylovely111 Рік тому +5

    Stephanie I have been following u for over a year and instantly connected with your love for travel. Do u have any suggestions for communities for single mothers who want to travel/retire early/become a nomad. A couple of years ago I resolved that I would move when my 13 year old graduated. Lately, that feels too far away. I would like to connect with other black mothers who are doing that now. Conversations about school, custody agreements with moving out of state and safety would’ve great. I work remotely so that’s not an issue

    • @VideoSiteAccess
      @VideoSiteAccess Рік тому +2

      If you look under her Live video section you will see several interviews with two parent and single parent households making this leap.

  • @dcmomma14
    @dcmomma14 Рік тому +1

    Man i would join the Bougie Auntie community but I'm way over the age limit. 🤣

  • @agoodthing74
    @agoodthing74 11 місяців тому

    As a married woman with school aged chern, I throw off Working hard and put on working smart

  • @verrellsmith6995
    @verrellsmith6995 Рік тому

    Yes I'm working on freeing myself to live life I've always wanted to live. And I have free flying privileges that I need to start using. Hello world here I come.. thank you Stephanie you are a blessing. Praise God for you 🙏🏽

  • @Marpessa28
    @Marpessa28 10 місяців тому

    My childhood self was similar. I am loving your content.

  • @margowilson7151
    @margowilson7151 Рік тому

    You have a beautiful smile! The message was not lost on me! Lol!!

  • @DominiqueHam
    @DominiqueHam Рік тому

    Hi Stephanie, i'm in step 3. the process of traveling the world

  • @rcmurphy5986
    @rcmurphy5986 29 днів тому

    definitely wanting to figure out how to take work on the ride, house sit and travel abroad.

  • @loveyvo
    @loveyvo Рік тому +5

    Living in the U.S. is scary 😨 and feels like the Twilight Zone at random times

  • @denisechilds2391
    @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +2

    Shared your video 😊

  • @JasenomadeTV
    @JasenomadeTV Рік тому

    Yeah, as I am planning to meet you, Roshida and all the amazing women in CT, I made sure to take tops hidding my arms... I do the same on UA-cam... thank you Stephanie... Thank you for teh wisdom...

  • @livefromtheground7274
    @livefromtheground7274 Рік тому

    0:09 Girl I’m working on it on the daily!

  • @mirendacan1
    @mirendacan1 5 місяців тому

    Hey Stephanie. A divorce has derailed my travel plans. I have a couple of questions I'd like to ask you. I'll share them on LinkedIn. Thanks.

  • @jaderoyale-brown
    @jaderoyale-brown Рік тому

    Replay Gang: I throughly enjoyed this video as I enjoy all of your content. Overall things are triggers but family and this current job(the people on my team) are huge for me. I said for 2024 I was going to be working on things for ME!!! Ase’ it will happen.

  • @eveleeta
    @eveleeta 11 місяців тому

    Hi. I'm new to your channel. Very interested in hearing more. I'm at a strange place in life. Feeling like i need to run away but don't know what I'm running from.
    Thinking about traveling solo. But Scared. 😢

  • @stcroixlover1
    @stcroixlover1 Рік тому

    Love this video. I need this.

  • @Goddess_Infinity
    @Goddess_Infinity 11 місяців тому

    ❤❤❤

  • @Candicelistens
    @Candicelistens Рік тому +2

    Do you think you could do time stamps

  • @tgainerjennings
    @tgainerjennings Рік тому

    @Makeda Rodriguez on UA-cam does book reviews.

  • @dwalker6868
    @dwalker6868 Рік тому

    Thank you for your video

  • @kiyomifrost
    @kiyomifrost 10 місяців тому

    The expectation to finish college when there is no “good” job in site. She wants me to work a low income job and grind my way to 70k a year

  • @selenapeaks5337
    @selenapeaks5337 Рік тому

    Retreatttssss pleassee❤

  • @Teexytee777
    @Teexytee777 Рік тому +2

    Stephanie. Is there a way I can do one one one coaching with you? just a phone call once or twice a month.?

  • @latoyar9168
    @latoyar9168 11 місяців тому

    I want to be free I know its a working progress please help me ❤

  • @Luvurselffirst
    @Luvurselffirst Рік тому

    I reject listening to people complain about things they cannot change.
    I reject carrying the weight of proving stereotypes placed on black folks by whites, wrong.
    I reject white supremacy ideologies.
    I reject not starting a youtube channel because if what the public may say or think
    I reject childhood-ptsd and racebased ptsd from hindering my life
    I reject not going for life for fear of life ending as soon as I start living.
    I dig Mel Robbins and the crappy childhood fairy's channels

  • @denisechilds2391
    @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +2

    So i can exit...

    • @orlettacaldwell
      @orlettacaldwell Рік тому

      Yes! Take a break and re-imagine what you want out of this life. Write it down.

    • @denisechilds2391
      @denisechilds2391 Рік тому +2

      @orlettacaldwell I'm doing it as I type this to you, I'm telling you, the plan I have is "won't wait a minute"...talking about my "faith in God", Girl I'm standing on it.....trust me ima post it, and be running like a scolded dog to united airlines..🥰🤣🥰!!!

  • @Mavkelley
    @Mavkelley Рік тому +2

    Stephanie, so were you a rebel as a child?

  • @dg9975
    @dg9975 10 місяців тому

    I'm white...can I not follow this advice? I started watching and liking your videos then realized I'm excluded as a white female. That's sad among other things. 😢 On to a more inclusive UA-cam channel then I guess.

  • @Pondering2b
    @Pondering2b 8 місяців тому

    No i don't want to get a phd MOTHER. love you though

  • @nelliehyder8303
    @nelliehyder8303 Рік тому

    😊😊😊👍👍👍