Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. The cheapest and fastest way to improve your motivation as a man is to stop masturbating. While masturbation may relieve men of the frustration they are likely to experience without an appropriate sexual outlet, this very frustration -- if sublimated -- is rocket fuel for success and achievement. This is because the sex drive is an attribute of the libido, or life force. Yoking the consistent intensity of the male sex drive to the prospect of long-term gain provides the focus and motivation to level up and excel. Highly recommended. Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: ua-cam.com/channels/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw.htmljoin Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode #motivation #success #redpill
i think avoididng the god of the new world culture that you talk about, benefits considerably only with natural lifestyle, like in food, avoiding drugs, excersize (pushing/pulling weights, and excersizing at rate where oen cannot talk clearly to somoen next to them, for highe rresting heart rate (rouhgly, more excited like one is when nervous with higher heartbeat rate) ), getting sunlight and keeping light dim and closer to red nearer to hours before sleep time (sunsent). sitting all day makes the "energy" (hormones percentile, i guess) only sit around geneitals instead of spreading around body. ive heard of so called bodily chakra or whatever its called, being the same concept, where you have to move some muscles as if your moving ceberal liquid of spine up toward the pineal gland in brain, away from just sticking around where gravity pulls it down. theres also concept of haveing multiple orgsm that do not emit the nutrient as woulf normally happen, it ssuppsoed to prevent the waste of nurtreint but i dont think it protects from lowering libdo (which is motivation, roughly speaking). i dont know how its done. dopamine fasting is to feel more dopamine by not having all of it realeased at once, which leaves one in bellow normal dopamine, which is painful, of low moitvation. but i think one also neeeds ot get in habit of putting effort with less quickly occuring reward, then the mind is in habit of enjoying effort more by anticipating reward , possible by good ehalth overall. then, overall better life experinces and memories can be won.
I subscribe to this channel to help myself understand men better. I did not know that men felt this way, afterward. That is interesting to learn. Does the depressed feeling occur as well after they have sex with a woman, or only after masturbating alone?
@@Nicole-zv7ee no, it's different with a woman. no depressed feeling, but indeed a feeling of letting go, which explains the tendancy to go to sleep. I would add that circulating the sexual energy makes also a very different experience, both while mastubating or while having intercourse with a partner, especially when the partner knows how to circulate her own energy. but that's another topic.
I agree! After 3 days of not masturbating, I created the first stairway to the moon. Jokes aside. Not masturbating gives men the drive to do more, find a woman, and become aggressive. However, the man should learn to channel this sexual energy and aggression. “It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.” - Chinese proverb
Thank you for this excellent video. I've refrained since August, and the sense of pent-up-volcano-like energy is extraordinary. It gives me enormous drive to do other things instead. The thought of relapsing becomes increasingly repellent as the months go by. It's fantastic for work/gym/jiu-jitsu etc. My rule of thumb is whenever my body is screaming at me (a lot of the time) I immediately do something else instead, channelling that energy, and feeling like a powerhouse.
not sure this is good advice at all actually. Reducing only leads to either increasing the level of frustration probably violence and in the long term lower sperm count. Men do not have a regular ovulation cycle, they are design for constant production (roughly every 2 to 3 days a man has an optimum amount). "It’s a misconception that men have to save up sperm when it’s baby-making time. In fact, frequent sexual activity is important for sperm health. “If the body isn’t getting the message to produce sperm, it won’t produce as much,” says Baratz. “Essentially, use it or lose it.” Health experts recommend that males ejaculate once or twice a week to maintain production." do not follow this man's advice!
Hmmm. I very much agree about not watching porn and personally find it boring anyway, but this is the first video of yours that I disagree with after truly appreciating absolutely everything else that you have produced. Aside from prostate health and a ton of other reasons, I respectfully think that this is not great advice. Addiction to anything is bad news, but exercising the love muscle is necessary on so many levels both physically and psychologically.
This is so true! I experienced this first hand just a couple months ago. I made a decision to not gratify my sexual urges unless a) It was with or by a women and b) I was not allowed to gratify myself until option a) happened. And let me tell you! you reach a point in which talking to women or random strangers is not optional but rather a necessity. The amount of drive and resources you can come up with to make it happen is unparallel!
I hate to be that guy but do you have a source? My understanding is testosterone peaks around a week and then declines. If you never masturbate your body "gives up" and that desire either begins to decline or leads to dangerous behavior. I don't have a source for that either, which is why I ask. A source from you will change my mind.
I don't know how many guys would relate but for singles... What alternatives do we really have.. Not all of us wants to get engaged or get married at this time.. Not all of us can sleep around due to many problems of culture taboo and religion etc.. I think it might come down as.. Mssterbate as little as you possibly can..
Hey fellas, I’m going to be honest with you . Motivation is mostly BS, what you need is discipline. Discipline is going to the gym when you don’t want to , it’s having the strength not to masturbate, eating the healthy bland food . Motivation is temporary for a lot of people .
I disagree. Motivation is a feeling, and feeling is the secret. Our subconscious mind reacts on how you feel, not what’s rational to the outside world. Discipline without a strong desire to feel good about your progress won’t carry enough momentum. Discipline is critical once you figure out your purpose in life. We need systems in life to avoid falling between the cracks, and discipline is the pedigree for achieving the best version of yourself.
Good point, but an aside, in no way does healthy food EVER need to be bland. a bit of salt, good fats, an acid, & a bit of the maillard effect and you got food that is much more flavorful than the unhealthy stuff.
@@Cpatel217 A why is certainly the ultimate north star, but many periods where a why is uncertain, not present or wavering, but you perform certain activities anyways because of a formed habit or discipline. it's not easy work to get to solid whys, meanwhile still need to be able to function.
I couldn’t find any reliable evidence or research showing that abstaining from masturbation had the positive health benefits that you make claims for. In fact, in some cases the opposite seems to be true.
I agree with the sentiment mostly. Only thing is discipline will take you places motivation won't but motivation helps. Also thanks for letting me know the biological reason I want a woman to leave after sex and why they wont glow somewhere else.
sexual energy is the life force that we deplit from our bodies with excessive masturbation ,also when you learn what it takes for our bodies to produce semen you will think twice next time you feel urge to release. I did once 30 days semen retention challenge and now it is a part of my lifestyle...this "discipline"simply makes you a better man in many ways..
This is a best video on nofap/noporn or semen retention, I've yet to encounter. Needless to say it cemented your channel as one of the greats. Glad I found about you by a chance.
I guess it's different for everybody... if I haven't been sexually satisfied, I just turn into a frustrated angry person that hates women.. it really does not make me work harder, i dont channel the pent up frustation into something productive... i accually feel better and i can focus better if i am getting regular sex.
Masturbation can be the solution: I was almost killed by my ex-wife in 2019 (actually still not divorced), which was also beating my son. I have custody of the children now which is a huge repellent for 99.99% of women on the dating scene. Dating has also become one-sided with women having the upper hand (I mean even if I lie for the custody). They basically want all. Why going hunting if it's so dissatisfying ? Because our hormones ask us ? Then why there is no prolactin pill for us men, so that we could get rid being attracted to women ?
I have a question. I understand and agree that masturbation holds you back from getting with a woman, but also does not masturbating make you vulnerable and susceptible to being taken advantage of by women? I am 61 and have two children and have already paid for the privileges' of procreating. I don't feel the need to make myself more susceptible and vulnerable to a woman.
Great video, great channel. Your star is on the rise. Well done. My question is how to deal with the blinding frustration, rage and the distraction of constantly thinking about sex? How can you channel and control that energy when it's constantly hijacking your brain? Especially in professions that require mental clarity and focus? Desk jobs, etc. I understand that athletes, laborers, etc can channel that energy into physical activities that lead to exhaustion. Application developers, accountants, etc do not get the benefits of physical activities to distract them at work. Working out daily, even multiple times daily helps reduce minimally. That said, what mental/physical strategies can one use to develop self control when you're constantly living on top of an erupting volcano? Furthermore, semen retention has been linked to prostate cancer. How do you deal with the negative health impacts of semen retention? Finding a partner seems like the obvious until you've experienced all the complexities of relationships including the weaponization of sex. Bottomline: This challenge is multifaceted, multi-layered. How do you channel this energy, maintain your physical and mental health, and remain mentally clear to be productive while working at a desk, sex straved?
Through my own personal experience…. My humble opinion is that going extreme on either side is no good. Our goal is to find a balance. Mentally, physically and possibly spiritually, I’ve always felt my best when I’m with a partner that I care deeply about whom I’m routinely active with. The periods of sublimation coupled with a healthy & hearty release provided inner resolve that I can’t really explain. To be exact I feel like Hercules, a demi god 💪🏾 lol
Sounds like a bad idea to me. Anything that makes us more dependent on others including females impairs our capacity to pursue what matters to us individually...including doing relatively little. I'm skeptical of glory or achievement as a path to fulfilment and happiness largely because, as you've said elsewhere, people are superficial. Achievement is also largely determined by where one starts the journey, which is determined primarily by random fate. Individualism is a form of non acceptance. For most people globally, who are born on the wrong side of the tracks, competitive achievement and the associated glory are unlikely. Jerking off won't stop a man in any case. There's still 15 additional hours left in his waking day to occupy. He's going to do what he can to improve his status, well being, and autonomy even if it's in a more feminine way.
Ehhh, I dunno about this. I have clear goals, and I do pretty well just being disciplined and working on the things I want to learn or improve on day by day, but at least every few days I've gotta rub one out or I can't stay focused. Just take a few minutes to get it out and clear my head then go back to the things I enjoy working on. Maybe it'd be better just to find a balance and keep things in moderation?
Mmm, I agree. But for me, the thing that makes the most difference by orders of magnitude is going to bed before 11pm. That's it for me. The 'batin definitely saps your mojo, but not getting proper sleep, in line with your circadian rhythm will DESTROY your work ethic and motivation.
I've heard this idea several times before. Yet, I'm not sure of its validity, at least for me. I've done "No Nut November" many years now, but I never come away feeling productive; I just end up feeling agitated and depressed more than anything. My normal life doesn't reward me with dopamine or anything, and it seemed like masturbation was the only source I had for it. At the same time, it is harder to relax at times without doing it. Some nights I become restless and cannot sleep until I do the deed, as it tends to relax everything more, expend some extra energy. What I gather from this video is not necessarily to stop masturbation per se, but to redirect the libido away from it towards something else. Yet, I'm not sure how to do that. During NNN, I just become busy and focus on other stuff so that my mind doesn't even have time to consider sex, but that too is unrewarding. So, how would someone turn their libido towards something else? It sounds strange, but is it possible to become attracted to bigger goals in a sexual manner?
You almost stumbled upon it. You need to write down or have whatever goal in mind. Then, while no fapping instead of doing busy work to distract yourself from your own libido. Use that time to work on your most important goals. It works wonderfully.
Napoleon Hill writes about trunsmuting your sexual energy to some goal. Might be true, however this nofap stuff is kind of a meme. It's natural to coom, and if you do it once in a while it's probably healthy.
No Nut November! It sounds like Lent, or Ramadan. Somebody thought up that idea, and then promoted it. I can't see many Feminists objecting to a mass boycott of pornography, let's put it that way. The political Left are crafty and dishonest, but very good at dreaming up ideas to control thought, speech and action.
@@MrMatthewhg no, it was a result of the right more than anyone. People who were trying to reinstate Catholic values in the world, starting with celibacy. But it's funny to see you try and bring your nonsense into it
Masturbation is a life saver. Without masturbation, every day, every minute, every second is dominated by women, thought of women. Masturbation takes women off your mind and gives you peace. Never assume your sex drive is the same as another man's. Not masturbating may not bother you, but it could destroy another man. Same as some people may not mind sexless marriages, while other people would go insane. Sex is Not equally powerful among different people. Just like some dogs are muzzled , kept on chains, and restricted behind 10 foot fences, while other dogs run free and tiptoe through the tulips. Sex drives are not equal. Some men NEED to choke the damn chicken.
Also, to show how unnatural it is to not release-- if you go without masturbation for a certain period, you will be inundated with CONSTANT vivid sex dreams, leading to the same outcome as masturbation itself...
Truth be told, stopping turned me into a hunter. I started taking care of my appearance....shaving daily, whitening my teeth, putting on cologne, tucking in my shirt, dressing nice, etc. I started flirting with women and going on dates....which led to a lot of late nights...
Sir, you are a genius. I have heard about no fap but it wasn’t explained on the hormonal level. Explaining this concept from the positive coping mechanism of sublimation frames this perfectly. This makes so much sense. I have a “friend” that needs to see this video so he can fix his unmotivated ass and get off the couch. Thanks again!
There's a book about sex drive and civilization by JD Unwin called "Sex and Culture" you might be interested in. He was an Oxford professor. Basically societies that restrain the sex drive the most produce the most technology and political progress, and societies that don't tend to stay more tepid and placid.
I’ve always scoffed at admonitions to limit masturbating, but not after hearing your explanation. I just started dating again after a long relationship and I’m having tons of success getting matches and conversations going on the apps, but dates and getting more intimate and emotionally connected has seemed much more elusive. I realize now that masturbating in preparation to be calmer or whatever I was thinking, has actually been completely undermining my motivation when I actually have an opportunity 💡
Not gonna lie, I find the prolactin release EXTREMELY USEFUL for falling asleep in a pinch. I genuinely believe it is a useless activity at any other time of day however. Having prolactin in your system makes sense for sleeping and relaxing. All other times of the day, it doesn’t.
@@th4fl4sh4I think if you could get in the daily habit of delaying that gratification a bit further closer to bedtime, you might find yourself able to get a lil more done after work
Thank you for your service Orion. You have know idea how much these videos help us. Hope you continue for many years and gain millions of viewers. Cheers, Matt
Sorry, Doc. You got part of this VERY WRONG. Sex drive will also decrease if you don't masturbate. It's an issue of frequency. You have to find the sweet spot to maintain the drive. Ideally, the sweet spot in a woman.
I spent my military career wearing "Birth Control Glasses" as a charm against female attention. I was proof against their advances and was devoted to becoming a better soldier, and did not contribute to the sort of business that might result in them quivering.
This is a series of schizophrenic leaps of non-equivalent metaphors. When the drive to acquire sex/orgasm becomes so great, it clouds the mind in even more harmful ways. It can be especially limiting to creativity when your main drive is to suppress the creative force of procreation. The mind is like a pendulum. If you try to still the pendulum, it is a kind of death. The only way to really make a powerful difference is to stop riding the pendulum. Allow it to swing and at the same time recognize you are the one watching the pendulum, not the pendulum itself.
Would legal prostitution be accepted as a form of sexual sublimation? It's with another sexual human, a woman in this case and doesn't require all the strenuous resource expenditure. Using your example of the equivalence to hunting, it would be like going grocery shopping to the supermarket. Pay for the necessary goods, and outta there.
Whooah!!! Hold on there Doc. Single are men are at risk for excessive masturbation? No. It’s the MARRIED MEN that aren’t getting laid. I’ve been single for about a year and can get laid almost whenever i want, or there’s at least a chance of it. Being married in a dead bedroom is far worse than being single in terms of access to socially acceptable means of acquiring sex. That’s the only thing I disagree with in this video though and there’s less than 2 minutes left in it.
IMO, achieving hard things requires discipline, not motivation. Motivation is very temporary and most valuable things require substantial amount of time. There is a difference btw morning and night. If it allows someone to sleep better and is not daily, it is fine.
It's weird it's different for me. Sometimes I am more productive and focus after. I will not say nofap and semen retention is bad because it helped me learning to say no to my urges. And i am now disciplined (not 100% because of nofap lol but maybe it helped), even when I want to open youtube for enternaiment I can say no, I have to do this thing to improve my life. But sometimes when I am sad I masturbate and I am better after, more focused and productive. I think it's a coping mechanism. It can be toxic if your do it all the time. But if you find a balance and do it rarely, it's ok. I know I have to be lonely for a long time to improve my self because I have a lot to change. So sometimes when I am sad, I think it's because I lack ocytocin. And I think masturbating give ocytocin. So, it's weird hearing it decreases it.
you're gonna be the next jordan peterson this ch is gonna blow up. i honestly am sitting here reflecting on how i'm living everything this guy is saying from having had such a hard time with finding a steady gf. i cannot find a gf, so the desire builds until i feel like i cannot think of anything else cannot sleep cannot concentrate, i feel so angry that others who i view less deserving have what i do not, i feel intense rage and resentment toward other men and women both. the only release was porn for my entire life and i was the first generation to have easy access to porn on the internet, i was the first generation to grow up along side the internet and internet porn. i had no idea that i was creating an exponential feedback loop between not getting girls, porn, too unmotivated to fix my life, anti-social behavior, everything. combine that w the state of modern dating. what are men to do? this is like a perfect storm. i've known about nofap and etc for about a decade now but i wish i knew in my younger years. i dont even blame porn bc i'd have been fapping w out porn anyway.
Respectfully, this social challenge was an issue long before the internet. Before the internet there was very few resources to solve the problem other than the library. Even that was weak in terms of selection. Now you have access to thousands of fantastic resources like this channel to accomplish and overcome anything. Shifting mental attitude sounds foolish but it actually works. It changes the way to view challenges and converts them into opportunities. The lense by which you view the world determines your perspective and inturn experiences. Learning how to control your attitude dramatically improves your chances of success. Bob Proctor has lots of great resources on mental performance. Good luck on your journey of transformation.
The drive to thrive in this world must be (i believe) from enthusiasm rather than sex, sex is a very uncertain way and n ocbstacle to develop and achieve personal goals, "well, if you got what it takes and you want to spawn babies yes, ok have descendence, but also you need great ammount of resources, laws are ba cking up women rather than men development.
I always found the whole semen retention and so on thing cringe. Maybe because I have always had a fairly high libido that I don't only feel in my mind, but also as a literal heat in my body if I hold back for too long. However, this time it's being said by someone who has proven to know what he's talking about most of the time, so I can at least entertain the idea. Again, however, I find one thing puzzling: if masturbation ending with ejaculation is bad, then why is normal sex that involves ejaculation not bad? (And don't tell me about sex without ejaculation, that's not what I'm talking about right now...) Or is there no difference as far as ejaculation is concerned, but most people pretend (or think) there is because they have no idea what they're talking about, and are just regurgitating knowledge?
Masturbating + Orgasm isn't " Bad" it just has pros and cons like everything else. One of the major cons is that it saps you of motivation to get the real thing. The goal should be to move from frequent Masturbation to frequent sex. What he's saying is that internal drive to find a partner can also be applied to other goals, which is 100% true. Also sex with a partner realese hormones that aren't present when your by yourself that's one of the key differences.
when you have sex, you satisfy you and your partner, when you wank your dick off alone in your loneliness you only satisfy you...the chemicals that were secreted meant for your partner and you, sadly due to no partner you feel alone and dive yourself into more loneliness which is resulted in depression which eventually cause no motivation to do anything. you lack self control and feel sick .. you can mastrubate if u have a partner because she is there you can have real sex whenevr you want..the real sex which is more pleasurable than mastrubation. but wanking alone in the room without a partner, man thats hard life when you can't get a partner.
There is indeed a difference neurobiologically when you have sex with someone vs when you masturbate by yourself. Also "true" semen retention is the ability to orgasm without ejaculating, not necessarily preventing ejaculation for the sake of preventing ejaculation.
@Promet17 you are right. This video was a cringe upload by an otherwise mostly respectable uploader. This may be a sign of things to come on this channel
In my experience, yes it does. But if your mental health is really poor then no, this alone will not work. I did 11 weeks of retention and only found slight improvement. So, I am not saying this is wrong but it is also too simple and won't work across the board, I needed a lot of therapy to gain better motivation in the form of EFT and BWRT therapy.
@@ellisjackson3355 you need to be working out though. When you build muscle, your muscles require testosterone, which your body would produce, making you stronger, mentally and physically.
I tried doing what he said and it made my depressive symptoms got a lot worse. I don't know my friends' habits, but I have a stronger drive to achieve things in my life than all of my friends. Doc tends to be on point, but this doesn't work for me.
Ever since I was a kid my dad said to us boys 'remember the secret to success.' That was code word for don't wank it. Wasn't till many years later I found out how right he was.
There are different types of urges. 1) Those caused by porn so you need to set porn blocker so you won't see porn by accident. 2) Stress induced urges. You need to invest time and energy in stress reduction and problem solving skills. Wim Hof method, progressive muscle relaxation, self hypnosis, mindfulness, cognitive behavioral therapy. 3) Urges induced by gazing at desired gender, erotic thoughts and imagination - Gentle redirection of the gaze helps a lot. Meditation on compassion towards people, seeing all people as brothers and sisters helps. Self hypnosis helps here a lot. Meditation on anatomy of human body helps.
what you said about squandering drive by un-willingness to tolerate frustration - 100%. sometimes i view being constantly horny as a negative because its become attached to so much resentment i fap just to feel calm instead of angry and resentful and frustrated to the max level. i also feel like i have no fire inside me either though. i feel dead inside from all the negativity women have brought me and the absence of having romantic outlets that i see everyone having but me. i guess the solution is attach horniness to whta you said life force and unremitting drive and positive stuff and ignore the negative shit about modern dating and women. 100% agree you saying the men who need to not fap the most are the men using pron
You give no evidence rather than your assertions. The sublimation/libido hypothesis was from Freud and traditional societies before him (e.g. Taoist internal alchemy). But modern theories of motivation are more diverse: both intrinsic and extrinsic factors, the vast majority being sex independent. Freud was wrong about most things - why should I believe him on this?
I actually disagree on this, using myself as motivation. Cutting down on masturbation actually brought down my sex drive. It made it too manageable. What do I mean? It made so I could always decide not to be horny, which meant I didn't have the drive to seal the deal with potential partners as I simply didn't feel like it. Now that I'm back to masturbating, my drive has climbed back up, and I'm doing a lot better in the bedroom. I would say, like most things in life, find a balance that works for you.
I definitely last longer and perform better with than without. Erection quality might not be as good tho tbh but lasting long enough for my partner to finish is massively important. I don’t think women would be impressed by a super super pent up guy who can’t even last and give them and experience. Ultimately I agree There is a balance and I’m still working on finding mine
Weirdly enough I had a similar experience to this. My sex drive lowered, and I found my sex energy stuck in me, almost like a use it or lose it phenomenon, and I was losing it. Definitely not the cure all I was expecting. I might try going for the rest of this month to see how it works for a few weeks, maybe I could tweak some aspects of it.
No sex or no fap? In physical terms - or indeed motivational - what is the practical difference? Guilt? If so, consider whether you have been manipulated into feeling that way and by whom. This whole no fap movement ought to be looked at very carefully within the recent modern context - we are talking about an urge which goes back as far as mankind. Every grown male you have ever known does it or has done it. What is different now is the porn - on the current scale, it is completely new. The anti porn movement is one thing; your physical needs and best interests are another. Not sure that many Urologists would ever give the advice that abstinence is good for you, especially for the long term. It is much more likely to cause harm.
@MrMatthewhg Yes, great comment here. By the same logic in this video, sex with a partner also kills motivation. Are we saying to stop that too? Many of the arguments from this abstinence movement are weak on evidence and heavy on shaming, which makes the motives suspect. Kind of like the circumcision movement in victorian England to diminish sexual sensitivity in men. It boils down to a control mechanism. Repressing natural bodily functions through brute force can lead to undesirable neuroticisms - I certainly know enough unpleasant people who need to get laid more.
Womens sexual drive is related to the periods around menstruation and ovulation. It´s definately a structural "problem" for men that a womans body is not necessarily wired to facilitate the never ending physical needs of men. I honestly think that it ought to be more "accepted" for men to use dolls for the purpose
I agree with this. Mike Tyson's interview suggested otherwise, when he abstained in the past but then regretted it. Medical sources also say masturbation is good for your health. It's hard to study this on a psychological level, but i wonder, is it all just modern propaganda in our hypersexualized society?
You haven't touched on how fostering your sex drive helps motivate a man to achieve any of their goals other than getting laid. You claimed it would increase motivation, and that skyscrapers, etc, were tbe result of a sublimated libido, but have not substantiated that claim at all. What is the connection between getting a spouse and succeding professionally? There are plenty of successful single men out there.
Hey Orion, thanks for the great content 👍 What role do you think working out plays on our ability to handle tough situations in general? I generally think that choosing to suffer voluntary in the gym makes us stronger not only physically but most importantly mentally. Curious to hear your thoughts on that
you just told us to sublimate not how to, im sure there's a more optimal process of sublimation than "don't climax and do impressive things instead". Id be interested to see a prescription of how to sublimate in the future for people that have already given up the vice.
The perspective presented in the video, suggesting that abstaining from masturbation can significantly boost motivation in men, is not widely supported by current scientific evidence in sexual health and psychology. While individual experiences vary, masturbation is generally considered a normal and healthy part of sexual behavior by many sexual health experts, such as Masters and Johnson, and Kinsey. The concept of sublimation, originally proposed by Freud, is not universally accepted as requiring abstinence from masturbation for successful achievement or greater accomplishments. The oversimplification of sexual drives based on gender does not account for the complex interplay of biological, psychological, and social factors influencing individual libido and sexual desire. It's important to approach such claims critically and consult healthcare professionals or sex therapists when considering significant changes in sexual behavior for psychological benefits.
I used it since secondary school when I read think and grow rich. It sounded logical and thus I've never masturbated (I just ejaculate unwillingly in sleep sometimes) or had sex. But this turned on me when I got into one of the top engineering schools, a very beautiful girl living in front of me tried to seduce me, and when my brain knew there was an easy way for actual sex, I couldn't channel the sexual energy into studying
wish people understood how the male body works. As a dude with a very high sex drive I've been sex shamed and felt guilty for having a high sex drive which lead to porn and addiction. I'd give anything to just stop it or make it go away but it's been literal hell for me growing up
Once you learn how to control that drive (probably with professional help) you could end up being one hell of a machine in productivity and reaching goals
What if you're a good six months out (minimum) before you can even think about dating due to your weight? Should we go back to having weird wet dreams? I want to stop, but I also don't want blue-balls.
Very practical advice, but it should be pointed out that this is mostly useful to single men. Those with partners have sexual obligations which preclude this tactic.
Roadmap of goal setting and achievement 1. Vision: The initial concept or idea that sparks the journey. 2. Identification: Recognizing what you want to achieve. 3. Planning: Outlining the steps needed to reach the goal. 4. Prioritization: Deciding what tasks are most important. 5. Commitment: Making a firm decision to pursue the goal. 6. Focus: Concentrating on the tasks at hand. 7. Strategy: The overarching approach to achieving the goal. 8. Execution: Carrying out the planned actions. 9. Adaptability: Modifying the plan as needed. 10. Discipline: Maintaining consistent effort and focus. 11. Milestones: Short-term goals that lead to the ultimate objective. 12. Feedback: Gathering information on the effectiveness of actions. 13. Assessment: Evaluating progress and making necessary adjustments. 14. Persistence: Continuing the effort despite challenges. 15. Optimization: Fine-tuning the approach for better results. 16. Accountability: Taking responsibility for actions and outcomes. 17. Resilience: Bouncing back from setbacks. 18. Validation: Confirming that the goal is still relevant and achievable. 19. Achievement: Successfully reaching the goal. 20. Reflection: Looking back on the journey to understand what worked and what didn't. 21. Celebration: Acknowledging the accomplishment. 22. Scaling: Taking the success to the next level or applying the lessons to new goals.
I am stopping with porn and masturbating. The first attempt I got to 7 days. My second attempt I got to 18 days. Now I am at day 2 and go for 21 days. Because I am addicted for many many many many many years... it is really a struggle. But I will manage in time! My goal is 30 days to get straight again. I also know that 90 days is the best because you totally will reset yor dopamine system. I also want to reach that goal. Maybe at the end of that I am free of masturbating and will never do it again (???) I will see at the time! Good luck to everyone who is quitting too!!! 🙂
Wow I am stunned by this ... Thank you very much for this clarity and true words. I think I save this video to watch it every week at least once to remind myself with the importance of this issue of the modern age. Thank you!
Thank you sir. IMHO/IMHE working hard and playing hard are good for males. Masturbating may be an option for the playing hard portion if folks have no other acceptable options at the moment. For males we do tend to need the release, and avoiding this will cause problems. Thanks Doc!
What do you recommend if a (typical sex drive) man is in a relationship with a high sex drive woman? How can he keep his nuclear reactor fueled if the woman wants to have sex almost every day? Much of his motivation will go to satisfying her, with less left over for career, fitness, and personal goals.
At the very least, reduce your self-loving as much as possible. Even doing this, in my experience, yields real results. The greatest tragedy of all this porn consumption is that it makes guys self-love waaay too much, and as a result they have no energy, no confidence, and sometimes can't even think straight. It's really interesting how too much self-love manifests itself the same was as too much drinking.
I'm a software engineer. I'm very busy on my normal 9-5 job and also my side business project that I hope to become my main bread n butter one day. So I currently have no time play this dating game. Usually after masturbation I have brain fog and becoming sluggish that also severely affects the progress of my work as coding is also mentally intensive tasks. I always have to reset by go to gym and do heavy exercises , then my mind become sharp again. However, if I withold masturbation too long, I become frustrated, mentally blocked, and also cannot think clearly or make the kind of smart flexible think-out-of-the-box business decision. I think masturbation certainly benefits and contributes to some different aspects of intelligence as well. So far I have to carry out this gym-mas cycle to keep my mind sharp and smart and active over the time. I really want to stop masturbation, but then how could I avoid the mental blockage or frustration, and still able to think "flexible" at same time ?
Yes, yes, yes. This video really hits it. Unfortunately, I usually can resist the wank for only about a week. But sometimes the defence persists for a month or two (and as a rule it coincides with some major change in my life or falling in love). And believe me, then it gives you some sort of extra, I dunno, brutal stupid energy, a will to live. Some crazy desire or despare, I should say. I can't describe it, but this is something really gooood. Thank you, doctor Onion Taliban :D
I feel in my most deep self, that you are correct even if I don't wan't it you to be. I am able to channel my high libido during the day by working on my businesses or working out or improving myself in different areas. Where I struggle is when I need to sleep/rest and there is no way to channel it anywhere and preventing me from resting properly. Do you have any advice? Or do I have to power myself out to tue point of just falling asleep instantly upon contact with my bed?
Good question. I struggled with that for years. Even while in relationships as I was good to go several times a day. For me it was really difficult at first. Had to take melatonin an hr before bed. Then it was strong mind control, focusing on other things.
@@sjmzeldaavgnfan Tough question as I'm not familiar with your situation. If you're married then have at it. Albeit, even in marriage it's important to have discipline in that area at times. Too much supply can lead to decreased demand. Not married I'd say just use caution. Maybe no s3x will motivate you to find a spouse or improve your ambition towards a goal. Obviously the s3x is way better after a dry spell.
@@bernard4459 Thanks for the input. Isn't there any other way than taking sleeping supplements? 😅 Otherwise I feel like I'm subsidizing masturation for melatonin...
Where the shit have you been? Your words answer so many questions, so specifically. It’s like if I have any doubts, listening to you is the end all of those doubts
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The cheapest and fastest way to improve your motivation as a man is to stop masturbating. While masturbation may relieve men of the frustration they are likely to experience without an appropriate sexual outlet, this very frustration -- if sublimated -- is rocket fuel for success and achievement. This is because the sex drive is an attribute of the libido, or life force. Yoking the consistent intensity of the male sex drive to the prospect of long-term gain provides the focus and motivation to level up and excel. Highly recommended.
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#motivation #success #redpill
turn the volume up on your videos bro. Excellent content, thanks, but that volume though dude. You'll blow up on YT soon.
i think avoididng the god of the new world culture that you talk about, benefits considerably only with natural lifestyle, like in food, avoiding drugs, excersize (pushing/pulling weights, and excersizing at rate where oen cannot talk clearly to somoen next to them, for highe rresting heart rate (rouhgly, more excited like one is when nervous with higher heartbeat rate) ), getting sunlight and keeping light dim and closer to red nearer to hours before sleep time (sunsent). sitting all day makes the "energy" (hormones percentile, i guess) only sit around geneitals instead of spreading around body. ive heard of so called bodily chakra or whatever its called, being the same concept, where you have to move some muscles as if your moving ceberal liquid of spine up toward the pineal gland in brain, away from just sticking around where gravity pulls it down. theres also concept of haveing multiple orgsm that do not emit the nutrient as woulf normally happen, it ssuppsoed to prevent the waste of nurtreint but i dont think it protects from lowering libdo (which is motivation, roughly speaking). i dont know how its done. dopamine fasting is to feel more dopamine by not having all of it realeased at once, which leaves one in bellow normal dopamine, which is painful, of low moitvation. but i think one also neeeds ot get in habit of putting effort with less quickly occuring reward, then the mind is in habit of enjoying effort more by anticipating reward , possible by good ehalth overall. then, overall better life experinces and memories can be won.
Bro. This guy is like the father I never had
Honestly
I could not have said it better
This dude is great man he actually talks about real issues and problems and how too quickly solve them!
Very true.
@@idesel no, in this case, his advice is not healthy for a man
Yeah I'm loving this content!
@@canemcave You'll just have to start doing regular pushups.
@@williammentink why us that what you do when you want to fk some girls?
Post Nut regret/depression is a real thing……. It’s mind boggling how our systems work and are so different than women’s…….
Women get our energy and get up and clean the house.
@@josephkelly6681 LOL, true!
I subscribe to this channel to help myself understand men better. I did not know that men felt this way, afterward. That is interesting to learn. Does the depressed feeling occur as well after they have sex with a woman, or only after masturbating alone?
@@Nicole-zv7ee no, it's different with a woman. no depressed feeling, but indeed a feeling of letting go, which explains the tendancy to go to sleep. I would add that circulating the sexual energy makes also a very different experience, both while mastubating or while having intercourse with a partner, especially when the partner knows how to circulate her own energy. but that's another topic.
To try and EQUAL men & women destroys both men & women!
I agree! After 3 days of not masturbating, I created the first stairway to the moon. Jokes aside. Not masturbating gives men the drive to do more, find a woman, and become aggressive. However, the man should learn to channel this sexual energy and aggression. “It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.” - Chinese proverb
Great Quote you found! _"It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.” - Chinese proverb_
Prolactin is a lifesaver. If it wouldn't kick in, men would go at it again and again. Imagine how many would die this way
Thank you for this excellent video. I've refrained since August, and the sense of pent-up-volcano-like energy is extraordinary. It gives me enormous drive to do other things instead. The thought of relapsing becomes increasingly repellent as the months go by. It's fantastic for work/gym/jiu-jitsu etc. My rule of thumb is whenever my body is screaming at me (a lot of the time) I immediately do something else instead, channelling that energy, and feeling like a powerhouse.
Get help, you are in a state of anxiety more than relaxation. To you, it looks like channelling.
I do BJJ too bruh, cheers!
BJJ brothers! Keep rolling 😎
@@CAJohnson14 All the way bruh!
@thezoldics7648 Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu... had to look it up
not sure this is good advice at all actually. Reducing only leads to either increasing the level of frustration probably violence and in the long term lower sperm count. Men do not have a regular ovulation cycle, they are design for constant production (roughly every 2 to 3 days a man has an optimum amount).
"It’s a misconception that men have to save up sperm when it’s baby-making time. In fact, frequent sexual activity is important for sperm health. “If the body isn’t getting the message to produce sperm, it won’t produce as much,” says Baratz. “Essentially, use it or lose it.” Health experts recommend that males ejaculate once or twice a week to maintain production."
do not follow this man's advice!
Well said, completely agree with you
Hmmm. I very much agree about not watching porn and personally find it boring anyway, but this is the first video of yours that I disagree with after truly appreciating absolutely everything else that you have produced. Aside from prostate health and a ton of other reasons, I respectfully think that this is not great advice. Addiction to anything is bad news, but exercising the love muscle is necessary on so many levels both physically and psychologically.
This is so true! I experienced this first hand just a couple months ago. I made a decision to not gratify my sexual urges unless a) It was with or by a women and b) I was not allowed to gratify myself until option a) happened. And let me tell you! you reach a point in which talking to women or random strangers is not optional but rather a necessity. The amount of drive and resources you can come up with to make it happen is unparallel!
bro please give me some tips on how to resist the urges. been trying this for a long time with no sucess...
You experiences it first hand...
@@chicotedelaacera7937 better than third hand
@@glumphyStoned I think of resisting in terms of a woman shit testing you, you must realize what each is and resist both.
@@glumphyStoned its not that you necessarily resist, it's that you channel that energy into activities, pursuits, & talking to/pursuing women
The squirrel outside your window at the end was a good touch. He's had the advice, and he's off to put it into practice :D
no stranger to the nut
Storing his nuts alright
I hate to be that guy but do you have a source? My understanding is testosterone peaks around a week and then declines. If you never masturbate your body "gives up" and that desire either begins to decline or leads to dangerous behavior. I don't have a source for that either, which is why I ask. A source from you will change my mind.
This has been my experience as well. Ancient wisdom and anecdotal evidence is what we currently have. I retain in moderation.
I don't know how many guys would relate but for singles... What alternatives do we really have.. Not all of us wants to get engaged or get married at this time.. Not all of us can sleep around due to many problems of culture taboo and religion etc.. I think it might come down as.. Mssterbate as little as you possibly can..
Hey fellas, I’m going to be honest with you . Motivation is mostly BS, what you need is discipline. Discipline is going to the gym when you don’t want to , it’s having the strength not to masturbate, eating the healthy bland food . Motivation is temporary for a lot of people .
You're correct, bit discipline + occasional motivation is even better
I disagree. Motivation is a feeling, and feeling is the secret. Our subconscious mind reacts on how you feel, not what’s rational to the outside world. Discipline without a strong desire to feel good about your progress won’t carry enough momentum. Discipline is critical once you figure out your purpose in life. We need systems in life to avoid falling between the cracks, and discipline is the pedigree for achieving the best version of yourself.
Good point, but an aside, in no way does healthy food EVER need to be bland. a bit of salt, good fats, an acid, & a bit of the maillard effect and you got food that is much more flavorful than the unhealthy stuff.
It's not one or the other man. Discipline is empty without a strong why.
@@Cpatel217 A why is certainly the ultimate north star, but many periods where a why is uncertain, not present or wavering, but you perform certain activities anyways because of a formed habit or discipline. it's not easy work to get to solid whys, meanwhile still need to be able to function.
I couldn’t find any reliable evidence or research showing that abstaining from masturbation had the positive health benefits that you make claims for. In fact, in some cases the opposite seems to be true.
I agree with the sentiment mostly. Only thing is discipline will take you places motivation won't but motivation helps. Also thanks for letting me know the biological reason I want a woman to leave after sex and why they wont glow somewhere else.
😂😂 glow somewhere else, haha
Quitting pron/masturbation is probably the best exercise in discipline in modern society (for men). It does both.
@@affable8696 Wanted to disagree with you man, but youre spot on. I'm just about to start my journey of quitting.
sexual energy is the life force that we deplit from our bodies with excessive masturbation ,also when you learn what it takes for our bodies to produce semen you will think twice next time you feel urge to release. I did once 30 days semen retention challenge and now it is a part of my lifestyle...this "discipline"simply makes you a better man in many ways..
How so? How does it make you a better man? Merely self control? Doesn't your frustration and anger increase?
This is a best video on nofap/noporn or semen retention, I've yet to encounter. Needless to say it cemented your channel as one of the greats. Glad I found about you by a chance.
I guess it's different for everybody... if I haven't been sexually satisfied, I just turn into a frustrated angry person that hates women.. it really does not make me work harder, i dont channel the pent up frustation into something productive... i accually feel better and i can focus better if i am getting regular sex.
An professional ball player can to the strip club the night before and still have a high performance game the day after.
Masturbation can be the solution: I was almost killed by my ex-wife in 2019 (actually still not divorced), which was also beating my son. I have custody of the children now which is a huge repellent for 99.99% of women on the dating scene. Dating has also become one-sided with women having the upper hand (I mean even if I lie for the custody). They basically want all. Why going hunting if it's so dissatisfying ? Because our hormones ask us ? Then why there is no prolactin pill for us men, so that we could get rid being attracted to women ?
I have a question. I understand and agree that masturbation holds you back from getting with a woman, but also does not masturbating make you vulnerable and susceptible to being taken advantage of by women? I am 61 and have two children and have already paid for the privileges' of procreating. I don't feel the need to make myself more susceptible and vulnerable to a woman.
I would think it does. Women often flirt with men for favors, it is hard to resist sometimes.
Good point, and obvious idea
Interesting point of view!
Great video, great channel. Your star is on the rise. Well done. My question is how to deal with the blinding frustration, rage and the distraction of constantly thinking about sex?
How can you channel and control that energy when it's constantly hijacking your brain? Especially in professions that require mental clarity and focus? Desk jobs, etc.
I understand that athletes, laborers, etc can channel that energy into physical activities that lead to exhaustion. Application developers, accountants, etc do not get the benefits of physical activities to distract them at work. Working out daily, even multiple times daily helps reduce minimally. That said, what mental/physical strategies can one use to develop self control when you're constantly living on top of an erupting volcano?
Furthermore, semen retention has been linked to prostate cancer. How do you deal with the negative health impacts of semen retention? Finding a partner seems like the obvious until you've experienced all the complexities of relationships including the weaponization of sex. Bottomline: This challenge is multifaceted, multi-layered. How do you channel this energy, maintain your physical and mental health, and remain mentally clear to be productive while working at a desk, sex straved?
Great question
Through my own personal experience…. My humble opinion is that going extreme on either side is no good. Our goal is to find a balance. Mentally, physically and possibly spiritually, I’ve always felt my best when I’m with a partner that I care deeply about whom I’m routinely active with.
The periods of sublimation coupled with a healthy & hearty release provided inner resolve that I can’t really explain.
To be exact I feel like Hercules, a demi god 💪🏾 lol
Semen retention isn't linked to prostate cancer
Sounds like a bad idea to me. Anything that makes us more dependent on others including females impairs our capacity to pursue what matters to us individually...including doing relatively little. I'm skeptical of glory or achievement as a path to fulfilment and happiness largely because, as you've said elsewhere, people are superficial. Achievement is also largely determined by where one starts the journey, which is determined primarily by random fate. Individualism is a form of non acceptance. For most people globally, who are born on the wrong side of the tracks, competitive achievement and the associated glory are unlikely.
Jerking off won't stop a man in any case. There's still 15 additional hours left in his waking day to occupy. He's going to do what he can to improve his status, well being, and autonomy even if it's in a more feminine way.
Ehhh, I dunno about this. I have clear goals, and I do pretty well just being disciplined and working on the things I want to learn or improve on day by day, but at least every few days I've gotta rub one out or I can't stay focused. Just take a few minutes to get it out and clear my head then go back to the things I enjoy working on. Maybe it'd be better just to find a balance and keep things in moderation?
If you're a man on a mission with little free time , watching porn helps with feeling pent up releases tension
I am so grateful that you exist dr Orion. Love from India ❤❤❤
I can already tell you're going to change my life with this message. No one has explained it as well as you did. This hit home.
You fixed the audio! It's now on stereo and well balanced. It's perfect.
"Nothing great can be accomplished quickly." FAVORITE new quote.
Mmm, I agree. But for me, the thing that makes the most difference by orders of magnitude is going to bed before 11pm. That's it for me. The 'batin definitely saps your mojo, but not getting proper sleep, in line with your circadian rhythm will DESTROY your work ethic and motivation.
And how to sleep peacefully if in a state of frustration...
Agree 100%.
I've heard this idea several times before. Yet, I'm not sure of its validity, at least for me. I've done "No Nut November" many years now, but I never come away feeling productive; I just end up feeling agitated and depressed more than anything. My normal life doesn't reward me with dopamine or anything, and it seemed like masturbation was the only source I had for it. At the same time, it is harder to relax at times without doing it. Some nights I become restless and cannot sleep until I do the deed, as it tends to relax everything more, expend some extra energy.
What I gather from this video is not necessarily to stop masturbation per se, but to redirect the libido away from it towards something else. Yet, I'm not sure how to do that. During NNN, I just become busy and focus on other stuff so that my mind doesn't even have time to consider sex, but that too is unrewarding. So, how would someone turn their libido towards something else? It sounds strange, but is it possible to become attracted to bigger goals in a sexual manner?
You almost stumbled upon it. You need to write down or have whatever goal in mind. Then, while no fapping instead of doing busy work to distract yourself from your own libido. Use that time to work on your most important goals. It works wonderfully.
Napoleon Hill writes about trunsmuting your sexual energy to some goal. Might be true, however this nofap stuff is kind of a meme. It's natural to coom, and if you do it once in a while it's probably healthy.
No Nut November! It sounds like Lent, or Ramadan. Somebody thought up that idea, and then promoted it. I can't see many Feminists objecting to a mass boycott of pornography, let's put it that way.
The political Left are crafty and dishonest, but very good at dreaming up ideas to control thought, speech and action.
Making you feel guilty is the speciality of the Left. Check your privilege!
@@MrMatthewhg no, it was a result of the right more than anyone. People who were trying to reinstate Catholic values in the world, starting with celibacy. But it's funny to see you try and bring your nonsense into it
Masturbation is a life saver.
Without masturbation, every day, every minute, every second is dominated by women, thought of women.
Masturbation takes women off your mind and gives you peace.
Never assume your sex drive is the same as another man's.
Not masturbating may not bother you, but it could destroy another man.
Same as some people may not mind sexless marriages, while other people would go insane.
Sex is Not equally powerful among different people.
Just like some dogs are muzzled , kept on chains, and restricted behind 10 foot fences, while other dogs run free and tiptoe through the tulips.
Sex drives are not equal.
Some men NEED to choke the damn chicken.
Also, to show how unnatural it is to not release-- if you go without masturbation for a certain period, you will be inundated with CONSTANT vivid sex dreams, leading to the same outcome as masturbation itself...
The only correct take. Masturabation and sex robots >>>>> Toxic overrated females with diseases and an unwanted child that will be used against you
Right on 😊
False
Maybe self/impulse control is in order?
I think one is controversial. If i go more than a week without sex or relief, im less productive.
Truth be told, stopping turned me into a hunter. I started taking care of my appearance....shaving daily, whitening my teeth, putting on cologne, tucking in my shirt, dressing nice, etc. I started flirting with women and going on dates....which led to a lot of late nights...
Sir, you are a genius. I have heard about no fap but it wasn’t explained on the hormonal level. Explaining this concept from the positive coping mechanism of sublimation frames this perfectly. This makes so much sense. I have a “friend” that needs to see this video so he can fix his unmotivated ass and get off the couch. Thanks again!
There's a book about sex drive and civilization by JD Unwin called "Sex and Culture" you might be interested in. He was an Oxford professor. Basically societies that restrain the sex drive the most produce the most technology and political progress, and societies that don't tend to stay more tepid and placid.
The most elegant NoFap video UA-cam has ever been graced with
I’ve always scoffed at admonitions to limit masturbating, but not after hearing your explanation.
I just started dating again after a long relationship and I’m having tons of success getting matches and conversations going on the apps, but dates and getting more intimate and emotionally connected has seemed much more elusive. I realize now that masturbating in preparation to be calmer or whatever I was thinking, has actually been completely undermining my motivation when I actually have an opportunity 💡
Not gonna lie, I find the prolactin release EXTREMELY USEFUL for falling asleep in a pinch. I genuinely believe it is a useless activity at any other time of day however. Having prolactin in your system makes sense for sleeping and relaxing. All other times of the day, it doesn’t.
I often do it after work in order to relax
@@th4fl4sh4I think if you could get in the daily habit of delaying that gratification a bit further closer to bedtime, you might find yourself able to get a lil more done after work
Thank you for your service Orion. You have know idea how much these videos help us. Hope you continue for many years and gain millions of viewers. Cheers, Matt
This worked for me. But then my sex drive died and now I find myself unmotivated to do anything. I don't know what to do.
Sorry, Doc. You got part of this VERY WRONG. Sex drive will also decrease if you don't masturbate. It's an issue of frequency. You have to find the sweet spot to maintain the drive. Ideally, the sweet spot in a woman.
I spent my military career wearing "Birth Control Glasses" as a charm against female attention. I was proof against their advances and was devoted to becoming a better soldier, and did not contribute to the sort of business that might result in them quivering.
This is a series of schizophrenic leaps of non-equivalent metaphors. When the drive to acquire sex/orgasm becomes so great, it clouds the mind in even more harmful ways. It can be especially limiting to creativity when your main drive is to suppress the creative force of procreation.
The mind is like a pendulum. If you try to still the pendulum, it is a kind of death. The only way to really make a powerful difference is to stop riding the pendulum. Allow it to swing and at the same time recognize you are the one watching the pendulum, not the pendulum itself.
Would legal prostitution be accepted as a form of sexual sublimation? It's with another sexual human, a woman in this case and doesn't require all the strenuous resource expenditure.
Using your example of the equivalence to hunting, it would be like going grocery shopping to the supermarket. Pay for the necessary goods, and outta there.
Whooah!!! Hold on there Doc. Single are men are at risk for excessive masturbation? No. It’s the MARRIED MEN that aren’t getting laid. I’ve been single for about a year and can get laid almost whenever i want, or there’s at least a chance of it. Being married in a dead bedroom is far worse than being single in terms of access to socially acceptable means of acquiring sex. That’s the only thing I disagree with in this video though and there’s less than 2 minutes left in it.
IMO, achieving hard things requires discipline, not motivation.
Motivation is very temporary and most valuable things require substantial amount of time.
There is a difference btw morning and night. If it allows someone to sleep better and is not daily, it is fine.
It's weird it's different for me. Sometimes I am more productive and focus after. I will not say nofap and semen retention is bad because it helped me learning to say no to my urges. And i am now disciplined (not 100% because of nofap lol but maybe it helped), even when I want to open youtube for enternaiment I can say no, I have to do this thing to improve my life. But sometimes when I am sad I masturbate and I am better after, more focused and productive. I think it's a coping mechanism. It can be toxic if your do it all the time. But if you find a balance and do it rarely, it's ok. I know I have to be lonely for a long time to improve my self because I have a lot to change. So sometimes when I am sad, I think it's because I lack ocytocin. And I think masturbating give ocytocin. So, it's weird hearing it decreases it.
Meditation has been for me the greatest weapon against porn addiction. Its effects have been, and Im not putting this mildly, profound
you're gonna be the next jordan peterson this ch is gonna blow up. i honestly am sitting here reflecting on how i'm living everything this guy is saying from having had such a hard time with finding a steady gf. i cannot find a gf, so the desire builds until i feel like i cannot think of anything else cannot sleep cannot concentrate, i feel so angry that others who i view less deserving have what i do not, i feel intense rage and resentment toward other men and women both. the only release was porn for my entire life and i was the first generation to have easy access to porn on the internet, i was the first generation to grow up along side the internet and internet porn. i had no idea that i was creating an exponential feedback loop between not getting girls, porn, too unmotivated to fix my life, anti-social behavior, everything. combine that w the state of modern dating. what are men to do? this is like a perfect storm. i've known about nofap and etc for about a decade now but i wish i knew in my younger years. i dont even blame porn bc i'd have been fapping w out porn anyway.
Respectfully, this social challenge was an issue long before the internet. Before the internet there was very few resources to solve the problem other than the library. Even that was weak in terms of selection. Now you have access to thousands of fantastic resources like this channel to accomplish and overcome anything. Shifting mental attitude sounds foolish but it actually works. It changes the way to view challenges and converts them into opportunities. The lense by which you view the world determines your perspective and inturn experiences. Learning how to control your attitude dramatically improves your chances of success. Bob Proctor has lots of great resources on mental performance. Good luck on your journey of transformation.
The drive to thrive in this world must be (i believe) from enthusiasm rather than sex, sex is a very uncertain way and n ocbstacle to develop and achieve personal goals, "well, if you got what it takes and you want to spawn babies yes, ok have descendence, but also you need great ammount of resources, laws are ba
cking up women rather than men development.
I always found the whole semen retention and so on thing cringe. Maybe because I have always had a fairly high libido that I don't only feel in my mind, but also as a literal heat in my body if I hold back for too long.
However, this time it's being said by someone who has proven to know what he's talking about most of the time, so I can at least entertain the idea. Again, however, I find one thing puzzling: if masturbation ending with ejaculation is bad, then why is normal sex that involves ejaculation not bad? (And don't tell me about sex without ejaculation, that's not what I'm talking about right now...) Or is there no difference as far as ejaculation is concerned, but most people pretend (or think) there is because they have no idea what they're talking about, and are just regurgitating knowledge?
Masturbating + Orgasm isn't " Bad" it just has pros and cons like everything else. One of the major cons is that it saps you of motivation to get the real thing. The goal should be to move from frequent Masturbation to frequent sex. What he's saying is that internal drive to find a partner can also be applied to other goals, which is 100% true. Also sex with a partner realese hormones that aren't present when your by yourself that's one of the key differences.
when you have sex, you satisfy you and your partner, when you wank your dick off alone in your loneliness you only satisfy you...the chemicals that were secreted meant for your partner and you, sadly due to no partner you feel alone and dive yourself into more loneliness which is resulted in depression which eventually cause no motivation to do anything. you lack self control and feel sick ..
you can mastrubate if u have a partner because she is there you can have real sex whenevr you want..the real sex which is more pleasurable than mastrubation. but wanking alone in the room without a partner, man thats hard life when you can't get a partner.
There is indeed a difference neurobiologically when you have sex with someone vs when you masturbate by yourself. Also "true" semen retention is the ability to orgasm without ejaculating, not necessarily preventing ejaculation for the sake of preventing ejaculation.
@Promet17 you are right. This video was a cringe upload by an otherwise mostly respectable uploader. This may be a sign of things to come on this channel
@@anneboyer6359 cringe for you.
I stopped and it really didn't help much
In my experience, yes it does. But if your mental health is really poor then no, this alone will not work. I did 11 weeks of retention and only found slight improvement. So, I am not saying this is wrong but it is also too simple and won't work across the board, I needed a lot of therapy to gain better motivation in the form of EFT and BWRT therapy.
I'm "just getting started" around the 3 month mark
@@ellisjackson3355 you need to be working out though. When you build muscle, your muscles require testosterone, which your body would produce, making you stronger, mentally and physically.
I tried doing what he said and it made my depressive symptoms got a lot worse. I don't know my friends' habits, but I have a stronger drive to achieve things in my life than all of my friends. Doc tends to be on point, but this doesn't work for me.
Dont buy this msg. "hunting" is a waste of time and resources.
Ever since I was a kid my dad said to us boys 'remember the secret to success.' That was code word for don't wank it. Wasn't till many years later I found out how right he was.
how to resist the urges bro?
There are different types of urges.
1) Those caused by porn so you need to set porn blocker so you won't see porn by accident.
2) Stress induced urges. You need to invest time and energy in stress reduction and problem solving skills.
Wim Hof method, progressive muscle relaxation, self hypnosis, mindfulness, cognitive behavioral therapy.
3) Urges induced by gazing at desired gender, erotic thoughts and imagination -
Gentle redirection of the gaze helps a lot.
Meditation on compassion towards people, seeing all people as brothers and sisters helps.
Self hypnosis helps here a lot.
Meditation on anatomy of human body helps.
Facts! It's amazing how much your courage and charisma with women goes when you're hungry as hell.
what you said about squandering drive by un-willingness to tolerate frustration - 100%. sometimes i view being constantly horny as a negative because its become attached to so much resentment i fap just to feel calm instead of angry and resentful and frustrated to the max level. i also feel like i have no fire inside me either though. i feel dead inside from all the negativity women have brought me and the absence of having romantic outlets that i see everyone having but me. i guess the solution is attach horniness to whta you said life force and unremitting drive and positive stuff and ignore the negative shit about modern dating and women. 100% agree you saying the men who need to not fap the most are the men using pron
I love how people throw around terms like millions of years when they have no clue about such an absurd theory
You give no evidence rather than your assertions. The sublimation/libido hypothesis was from Freud and traditional societies before him (e.g. Taoist internal alchemy). But modern theories of motivation are more diverse: both intrinsic and extrinsic factors, the vast majority being sex independent. Freud was wrong about most things - why should I believe him on this?
I actually disagree on this, using myself as motivation. Cutting down on masturbation actually brought down my sex drive. It made it too manageable. What do I mean?
It made so I could always decide not to be horny, which meant I didn't have the drive to seal the deal with potential partners as I simply didn't feel like it.
Now that I'm back to masturbating, my drive has climbed back up, and I'm doing a lot better in the bedroom.
I would say, like most things in life, find a balance that works for you.
I definitely last longer and perform better with than without. Erection quality might not be as good tho tbh but lasting long enough for my partner to finish is massively important. I don’t think women would be impressed by a super super pent up guy who can’t even last and give them and experience. Ultimately I agree There is a balance and I’m still working on finding mine
Masturbating definitely makes me "thirstier," which is repulsive
Weirdly enough I had a similar experience to this. My sex drive lowered, and I found my sex energy stuck in me, almost like a use it or lose it phenomenon, and I was losing it. Definitely not the cure all I was expecting. I might try going for the rest of this month to see how it works for a few weeks, maybe I could tweak some aspects of it.
I've practiced semen retention for years and I concur, there is definitely a balance that needs to be maintained.
@@johnokeeffe698 I've experienced this as well.
No sex or no fap? In physical terms - or indeed motivational - what is the practical difference? Guilt? If so, consider whether you have been manipulated into feeling that way and by whom.
This whole no fap movement ought to be looked at very carefully within the recent modern context - we are talking about an urge which goes back as far as mankind. Every grown male you have ever known does it or has done it.
What is different now is the porn - on the current scale, it is completely new. The anti porn movement is one thing; your physical needs and best interests are another. Not sure that many Urologists would ever give the advice that abstinence is good for you, especially for the long term. It is much more likely to cause harm.
@MrMatthewhg Yes, great comment here. By the same logic in this video, sex with a partner also kills motivation. Are we saying to stop that too? Many of the arguments from this abstinence movement are weak on evidence and heavy on shaming, which makes the motives suspect. Kind of like the circumcision movement in victorian England to diminish sexual sensitivity in men. It boils down to a control mechanism. Repressing natural bodily functions through brute force can lead to undesirable neuroticisms - I certainly know enough unpleasant people who need to get laid more.
Womens sexual drive is related to the periods around menstruation and ovulation. It´s definately a structural "problem" for men that a womans body is not necessarily wired to facilitate the never ending physical needs of men. I honestly think that it ought to be more "accepted" for men to use dolls for the purpose
Love the content but i pay for youtube premium to have no ads for that i am having to unsubscribe
I agree with this. Mike Tyson's interview suggested otherwise, when he abstained in the past but then regretted it. Medical sources also say masturbation is good for your health. It's hard to study this on a psychological level, but i wonder, is it all just modern propaganda in our hypersexualized society?
You haven't touched on how fostering your sex drive helps motivate a man to achieve any of their goals other than getting laid. You claimed it would increase motivation, and that skyscrapers, etc, were tbe result of a sublimated libido, but have not substantiated that claim at all. What is the connection between getting a spouse and succeding professionally? There are plenty of successful single men out there.
Hey Orion, thanks for the great content 👍
What role do you think working out plays on our ability to handle tough situations in general?
I generally think that choosing to suffer voluntary in the gym makes us stronger not only physically but most importantly mentally.
Curious to hear your thoughts on that
I see no difference in having sex once a day vs masturbating once a day.
you just told us to sublimate not how to, im sure there's a more optimal process of sublimation than "don't climax and do impressive things instead".
Id be interested to see a prescription of how to sublimate in the future for people that have already given up the vice.
Just don't miss out to clean the pipe once in a while ... every organ needs training.
The perspective presented in the video, suggesting that abstaining from masturbation can significantly boost motivation in men, is not widely supported by current scientific evidence in sexual health and psychology. While individual experiences vary, masturbation is generally considered a normal and healthy part of sexual behavior by many sexual health experts, such as Masters and Johnson, and Kinsey. The concept of sublimation, originally proposed by Freud, is not universally accepted as requiring abstinence from masturbation for successful achievement or greater accomplishments. The oversimplification of sexual drives based on gender does not account for the complex interplay of biological, psychological, and social factors influencing individual libido and sexual desire. It's important to approach such claims critically and consult healthcare professionals or sex therapists when considering significant changes in sexual behavior for psychological benefits.
*Well at least , give it a try.*
I used it since secondary school when I read think and grow rich. It sounded logical and thus I've never masturbated (I just ejaculate unwillingly in sleep sometimes) or had sex. But this turned on me when I got into one of the top engineering schools, a very beautiful girl living in front of me tried to seduce me, and when my brain knew there was an easy way for actual sex, I couldn't channel the sexual energy into studying
wish people understood how the male body works. As a dude with a very high sex drive I've been sex shamed and felt guilty for having a high sex drive which lead to porn and addiction. I'd give anything to just stop it or make it go away but it's been literal hell for me growing up
Think about who it was that shamed you and why they might have done so.
Once you learn how to control that drive (probably with professional help) you could end up being one hell of a machine in productivity and reaching goals
Hey, read "The Easy Peasy Way of Quitting Porn"
Read a book called "The Easy Peasy Method"
My brain needs feeding this channel is my new Favorite
I’ve been trying to put this in words AMAZING
What if you're a good six months out (minimum) before you can even think about dating due to your weight? Should we go back to having weird wet dreams? I want to stop, but I also don't want blue-balls.
Very practical advice, but it should be pointed out that this is mostly useful to single men. Those with partners have sexual obligations which preclude this tactic.
He mentions in the beginning that this is most relevant to (single) men. 👌
Roadmap of goal setting and achievement
1. Vision: The initial concept or idea that sparks the journey.
2. Identification: Recognizing what you want to achieve.
3. Planning: Outlining the steps needed to reach the goal.
4. Prioritization: Deciding what tasks are most important.
5. Commitment: Making a firm decision to pursue the goal.
6. Focus: Concentrating on the tasks at hand.
7. Strategy: The overarching approach to achieving the goal.
8. Execution: Carrying out the planned actions.
9. Adaptability: Modifying the plan as needed.
10. Discipline: Maintaining consistent effort and focus.
11. Milestones: Short-term goals that lead to the ultimate objective.
12. Feedback: Gathering information on the effectiveness of actions.
13. Assessment: Evaluating progress and making necessary adjustments.
14. Persistence: Continuing the effort despite challenges.
15. Optimization: Fine-tuning the approach for better results.
16. Accountability: Taking responsibility for actions and outcomes.
17. Resilience: Bouncing back from setbacks.
18. Validation: Confirming that the goal is still relevant and achievable.
19. Achievement: Successfully reaching the goal.
20. Reflection: Looking back on the journey to understand what worked and what didn't.
21. Celebration: Acknowledging the accomplishment.
22. Scaling: Taking the success to the next level or applying the lessons to new goals.
This is great!
I am stopping with porn and masturbating. The first attempt I got to 7 days. My second attempt I got to 18 days. Now I am at day 2 and go for 21 days. Because I am addicted for many many many many many years... it is really a struggle. But I will manage in time! My goal is 30 days to get straight again. I also know that 90 days is the best because you totally will reset yor dopamine system. I also want to reach that goal. Maybe at the end of that I am free of masturbating and will never do it again (???) I will see at the time!
Good luck to everyone who is quitting too!!! 🙂
Wow I am stunned by this ... Thank you very much for this clarity and true words. I think I save this video to watch it every week at least once to remind myself with the importance of this issue of the modern age. Thank you!
So according to this sex with a partner will also decrease your motivation, right?
Thank you sir. IMHO/IMHE working hard and playing hard are good for males. Masturbating may be an option for the playing hard portion if folks have no other acceptable options at the moment. For males we do tend to need the release, and avoiding this will cause problems. Thanks Doc!
I think use it or lose it. If that means taking care of yourself, so be it
what about prostate cancer? it is healthy to ejaculate at least two times per week.
This is something I always knew but it's hard to get rid of once it's habit.
Thank you for you work! How do women improve their motivation?
@PsycHacks Where's the video on how to "sublimate correctly" (7:45)?
great video.
What do you recommend if a (typical sex drive) man is in a relationship with a high sex drive woman? How can he keep his nuclear reactor fueled if the woman wants to have sex almost every day? Much of his motivation will go to satisfying her, with less left over for career, fitness, and personal goals.
Great question
Tantric sex and dry/non ejaculatory orgasms, semen retention, etc.
Most honest and realistic talk I’ve heard on this subject.
At the very least, reduce your self-loving as much as possible. Even doing this, in my experience, yields real results. The greatest tragedy of all this porn consumption is that it makes guys self-love waaay too much, and as a result they have no energy, no confidence, and sometimes can't even think straight. It's really interesting how too much self-love manifests itself the same was as too much drinking.
Can’t call it self - love, it’s self - harm.
I’ve been in a sexless marriage for four years. Masturbation has probably stopped me from committing suicide or homicide.
I'm a software engineer. I'm very busy on my normal 9-5 job and also my side business project that I hope to become my main bread n butter one day. So I currently have no time play this dating game. Usually after masturbation I have brain fog and becoming sluggish that also severely affects the progress of my work as coding is also mentally intensive tasks. I always have to reset by go to gym and do heavy exercises , then my mind become sharp again. However, if I withold masturbation too long, I become frustrated, mentally blocked, and also cannot think clearly or make the kind of smart flexible think-out-of-the-box business decision. I think masturbation certainly benefits and contributes to some different aspects of intelligence as well. So far I have to carry out this gym-mas cycle to keep my mind sharp and smart and active over the time. I really want to stop masturbation, but then how could I avoid the mental blockage or frustration, and still able to think "flexible" at same time ?
Yes, yes, yes. This video really hits it. Unfortunately, I usually can resist the wank for only about a week. But sometimes the defence persists for a month or two (and as a rule it coincides with some major change in my life or falling in love). And believe me, then it gives you some sort of extra, I dunno, brutal stupid energy, a will to live. Some crazy desire or despare, I should say. I can't describe it, but this is something really gooood.
Thank you, doctor Onion Taliban :D
Napoleon Hill talks in Think & Grow rich about the transmutation of sexual energy. Same idea, love it, and I think super underrated
I feel in my most deep self, that you are correct even if I don't wan't it you to be. I am able to channel my high libido during the day by working on my businesses or working out or improving myself in different areas. Where I struggle is when I need to sleep/rest and there is no way to channel it anywhere and preventing me from resting properly. Do you have any advice? Or do I have to power myself out to tue point of just falling asleep instantly upon contact with my bed?
Good question. I struggled with that for years. Even while in relationships as I was good to go several times a day. For me it was really difficult at first. Had to take melatonin an hr before bed. Then it was strong mind control, focusing on other things.
@@joncarbone What about sleeping with a woman. Should I refrain from that as well?
@@sjmzeldaavgnfan Tough question as I'm not familiar with your situation. If you're married then have at it. Albeit, even in marriage it's important to have discipline in that area at times. Too much supply can lead to decreased demand. Not married I'd say just use caution. Maybe no s3x will motivate you to find a spouse or improve your ambition towards a goal. Obviously the s3x is way better after a dry spell.
Use the energy to find your high value monogamous wife. Then have sex freely. To sleep take 5-10mg melatonin. This does get better over time.
@@bernard4459 Thanks for the input. Isn't there any other way than taking sleeping supplements? 😅
Otherwise I feel like I'm subsidizing masturation for melatonin...
I'm so depressed I have zero sex drive
Your channel is incredibly helpful! Thank you for sharing your knowledge!
Where the shit have you been? Your words answer so many questions, so specifically. It’s like if I have any doubts, listening to you is the end all of those doubts
I'd like to hear your thoughts on how to sublimate correctly. I seem to struggle with this every time I refrain from self-pollution.
This.