Narcissistic Abuse Trauma Can LITERALLY Change Your Face

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  • Опубліковано 5 вер 2024
  • Heal After Surviving Narcissistic Parent
    emotionalabuse...

КОМЕНТАРІ • 235

  • @narcabusecoach
    @narcabusecoach  Місяць тому +19

    Heal After Surviving Narcissistic Parent
    emotionalabuserecovery.com/hap

    • @danishkhan-gp9mm
      @danishkhan-gp9mm Місяць тому

      Kitni baar bachaoge😢 victim of my mother in law drastically changed my face my face is saggy dark circles skin dried change it my appearance

  • @christinemunger7054
    @christinemunger7054 Місяць тому +109

    I noticed it in reverse...after I left the narcissist! My face is looking younger and less puffy.

    • @nji7772
      @nji7772 Місяць тому

      Toxins cause inflamation. The body knows.

    • @casperinsight3524
      @casperinsight3524 Місяць тому +5

      WooHoo 🎉😅🙏🏼

    • @aishwaryapatlolla5615
      @aishwaryapatlolla5615 Місяць тому +5

      Same

    • @Bawkr
      @Bawkr Місяць тому +6

      This is shocking. Same here.

    • @iconsnart
      @iconsnart Місяць тому +1

      Yey, what Great news🎉🎉🎉

  • @mimap275
    @mimap275 Місяць тому +109

    May God heal us all who hv been abused and restore us to full health and vitality ijn

    • @karenzilverberg4699
      @karenzilverberg4699 Місяць тому +11

      Amen.

    • @casperinsight3524
      @casperinsight3524 Місяць тому +3

      🙏🏼🤍🙏🏼

    • @abduldanial-1467
      @abduldanial-1467 Місяць тому

      Ameen

    • @fatchanceannie
      @fatchanceannie Місяць тому +4

      Thank you! I pray the same for everyone. You are precious people. God flood your hearts with his love joy and peace in the Holy Spirit in Jesus name amen

    • @mimap275
      @mimap275 Місяць тому

      @@fatchanceannie amen

  • @reneepoulin8232
    @reneepoulin8232 Місяць тому +64

    You can never prove mental abuse .. And the narcissist will make sure of it .. know your truth and run for your life

    • @casperinsight3524
      @casperinsight3524 Місяць тому +5

      A picture is worth a thousand words ....
      You before the N and you during the N speaks volumes

    • @casperinsight3524
      @casperinsight3524 Місяць тому +2

      Never say never 😉 they could be secretly monitored by friends, family, co-workers for example

    • @elizabethbowie9753
      @elizabethbowie9753 Місяць тому +3

      So true. I live in a senior housing complex. My next door, "neighbor," harrassed me SO Much. I told my daughter, (a Paralegal) that I felt like I was beaten with a baseball bat on my back, Every Day until I got an apt on the other side of here.
      She said, "Mom; That's Emotional Abuse. But you don't have any wounds we can see physically, so nothing can be proven in court," .
      I said, "I know. When I left your father... I felt like I was black & blue from head to toe. But No one could see the Pain I went through."

  • @mimap275
    @mimap275 Місяць тому +71

    Too much stress, u lose ur glow and shine ✨️

  • @naowright9308
    @naowright9308 Місяць тому +61

    It isn't that I look older, it is that I look sadder. I look quite young for my age, but especially when I have had a stressful encounter with the narcissist my resting face looks like I am about to cry.

    • @MadinaBashir-t1g
      @MadinaBashir-t1g Місяць тому +7

      Same

    • @VASHTI7CASHAPP-POPUP
      @VASHTI7CASHAPP-POPUP Місяць тому +1

      The Blessing is that we are good people inside and out and our beauty always shines through stay strong and continue watching videos like this they really help. (#YOU'RE NOT ALONE)

    • @JessAnonymous
      @JessAnonymous Місяць тому +1

      I have a resting B face. I just learned about the furrowed brow mean mug symptom smh

  • @juanderuano8969
    @juanderuano8969 Місяць тому +264

    Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

    • @laurawheeler-px6oz
      @laurawheeler-px6oz Місяць тому +2

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back

    • @juanderuano8969
      @juanderuano8969 Місяць тому

      Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

    • @laurawheeler-px6oz
      @laurawheeler-px6oz Місяць тому +1

      Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

    • @juanderuano8969
      @juanderuano8969 Місяць тому

      Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

  • @chachi_is_my_dog
    @chachi_is_my_dog Місяць тому +43

    Do you think this is why old photos of children from the depression era looked so much older than their age?

    • @LoveAlways333
      @LoveAlways333 Місяць тому +9

      OMG! That's a good observation!!!

    • @jaynekittycat9252
      @jaynekittycat9252 Місяць тому +8

      Your right.

    • @cassiebennet4262
      @cassiebennet4262 Місяць тому +5

      Not negating the potential effects of narcissistic abuse, but I think it largely had to do with being stressed out from extreme poverty.

  • @zipplock69
    @zipplock69 Місяць тому +43

    After leaving my husband I didn’t know how bad my face or body looked until I got my daughters home, she started crying I didn’t understand why , then she said mom your eyes look like they are about to pop out your head and your face is sunken in I felt so embarrassed. I didn’t realize I looked like that and I didn’t even realize my clothes was hanging off of me. I had lost so much weight.

    • @ANUBISd88
      @ANUBISd88 Місяць тому +4

      I remember the look of shock of my malignant narc/bpd mother and my bpd brother when they saw me again after I left my malignant narc/bpd ex (he is so psychopathic, even my mother is a much better person than him). I knew already how I was looking, but this made me feel really bad. Then my mother convinced my brother that I am a drug addict that made me feel "badder"... 😂

    • @ReRe_642
      @ReRe_642 Місяць тому +3

      @@zipplock69 sweetheart you are free get yourself together be the beautiful woman you are. Now get to it ok.

  • @user-np4ge5wy4o
    @user-np4ge5wy4o Місяць тому +24

    With him: puffiness, sad/dead eyes, wrinkles, strange smile (pretending I was ok), massive hair loss, weight gain/loss without control ,shock eyebrows, wrinkles, sad old face, asymmetric face , always in a strange /frightened expression. Without him: ME . Happy and free as Jesus Christ made me.

    • @cassiebennet4262
      @cassiebennet4262 Місяць тому +4

      Amen. I experience much of what you're described.

  • @zindhagizindabadh1006
    @zindhagizindabadh1006 Місяць тому +9

    It's not only the face,the constant aches and pain in my body is horrible to bear

  • @user-ye4tx2bj6s
    @user-ye4tx2bj6s Місяць тому +94

    Ask them to do something for you. Something small. Something you would do for them with no hesitation. If they are narcissistic or otherwise toxic, it will ALWAYS go at least 1 of 4 ways (though sometimes these reactions may compound): They will act as though they didn’t hear you. Depending on how long you’ve been in the relationship, you may ask again. If it’s been long enough, you’re likely to drop the request right then and there.
    They will promise to do it, but never follow through.
    If you ask again or remind them, they will usually have some kind of excuse. In these cases, they will still never actually fulfill their promise. Their excuse is not a reason for lagging, it is the reason they should be absolved from all expectation whatsoever. Often this excuse will be meaningless or an outright lie.If you don’t buy their excuse, and tell them so, you will experience the wonderful segue into reaction.
    An argument will ensue
    The argument will be your fault. It could be a small back and forth contending against your request, or it might quickly devolve into them screaming at you. You never know which it will be. They might even say outright that you should never ask or expect anything from them. Usually they will express that you are asking too much, hurting them in some way (financially, emotionally, insulting them, etc), or attack your character.
    The argument will only end when you relinquish your request + apologize, or start ignoring them completely. If you can ignore them long enough, they may apologize to you. However, the conflict will never feel truly resolved.
    At this juncture they may actually end up giving you what you asked for. Often this does require you admitting that you don’t really need it, or that you would be fine with what they suggested instead. This leads us to reaction
    They give you what you asked for, BUT
    There is ALWAYS a catch. It might be small. They show up late with no apology. They buy you what you wanted, but it’s the wrong color, model, brand, etc. They take you where you wanted to go, but pressure you the whole time you’re getting ready because you’re going to be sooo late. Then they want to leave early anyway. It might be worse. They do it out of anger, and make a big display out of it to scare/hurt you. They hold it over your head until you do something for them first. Or, later on, they use it against you. “I did x for you, so you should do y for me.” No matter what, you never actually feel fulfilled, happy, or loved when they do something for you. Somehow, even from the getgo, there was this deep-seated feeling of guilt and fear, this sense that the “special” things they were doing for you weren’t so special at all. Eventually, you become afraid to ask for anything. You’ve been conditioned to believe you deserve nothing. Ironically, or not, the less demands you make, the worse you will be treated. Moreover, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done digitalinvestigate@gmail.com

  • @ZenithZephyr-8
    @ZenithZephyr-8 Місяць тому +34

    Hell yeah!! Its like you age 10 years in a span of 6 months.. sunken eyes, dark circles, wrinkles..I hope I get my face back soon .😅

    • @ANUBISd88
      @ANUBISd88 Місяць тому +3

      Of course your face is going to recover! I know by personal experience.

  • @lindafolks
    @lindafolks Місяць тому +13

    Those demons love that!
    They will love to take unattractive pictures of you to twist the knife of their actions!
    God will deal with them when they least expect it!!
    Glory be to God!
    🙏❤️🕊

  • @Cgruiz8690
    @Cgruiz8690 Місяць тому +29

    Yesssss!!! I always hate pictures of myself!

    • @shahp84
      @shahp84 Місяць тому +4

      Same with me

    • @Nels379
      @Nels379 Місяць тому +3

      Same here. Never use to be that way. Just after my marriage I started to hate my picture. Now into this marriage 44 years.

  • @mangaimano
    @mangaimano Місяць тому +13

    "I didn't leave him, but after realizing that he is a narcissistic psychopath, I felt a peace inside and stopped emotional eating. Because of the confusion over 14 years, his multiple faces, and domestic violence, I realized I don't have any psychological problems. Any human being might react to such things."

  • @daisynadal6909
    @daisynadal6909 Місяць тому +24

    I feel like my face is unrecognizable today after the narcissistic abuse...I've aged, and have dark spots and a rigidity I never had before...thank you for addressing this very real thing.

    • @ANUBISd88
      @ANUBISd88 Місяць тому

      You are going to look ok and beautiful again while recovering. It is just that it takes some time.

    • @joanbaczek2575
      @joanbaczek2575 Місяць тому

      @@ANUBISd88I been away from him for 2 years and no improvement 😠

  • @therealaayan
    @therealaayan Місяць тому +26

    I used to love putting my own selfies as my phone wallpaper, but now, after narcissistic abuse, I dislike my appearance. My glow seems to have disappeared.
    However, I am confident that I will regain my appearance and confidence for sure.

    • @sarcasticcat4982
      @sarcasticcat4982 Місяць тому +4

      I'm with ya! 😊👍

    • @b8akaratn
      @b8akaratn Місяць тому +5

      You can do it. Just takes time + gentleness to yourself. 😊 Also, ppl are each their own harshest critic on a good day, but we narcsurviors learned to self inflict with precision, unfortunately. So may you please be a friend to that person you see in your mirror 😊

  • @LoveAlways333
    @LoveAlways333 Місяць тому +7

    I completely agree! I got bells palsy on my face due to narcissistic abuse. This was 15 years ago, and I still deal with the residual effects!!!

  • @Grace-km1df
    @Grace-km1df Місяць тому +4

    Everytime I look in the mirror, I see a scared, sad, helpless puppy dog face I can’t quite shake

  • @carparthero
    @carparthero Місяць тому +35

    imo, the absolutely most cruel thing about the narcissist experience, is that narcissist abuse entails 4 layers:
    a) the abuse itself
    b) the denial, blame-gaming and gaslighting by the narcissist
    c) enablers, be it family, friends, co-workers who turn a blind eye/trivialize your lived experiences.
    d) the accompanying mental and physical ailments that happen during and after the narcissist experience.
    cheers from southern ontario, canada 🍁

  • @JohnJohn-pm9wq
    @JohnJohn-pm9wq Місяць тому +14

    There is tangible researched proof that trauma and emotional pain causes physical changes. Our face and our eyes are the most reflective of what we are feeling. There are instances where a person going through emotional abuse and trauma have looked unrecognisably different than when they were mentally healthy in their truest form

  • @AmandaPryar
    @AmandaPryar Місяць тому +20

    Yes! When I left my Narcissist I wasn't near a mirror for over a month but when I went to live with my brother I looked in the mirror and I didn't recognise myself; even though I'm 63 years old, I didn't look that age, but when I looked in the mirror I had to just look, because I didn't recognise the person staring back at me; my eyes were dark around them like a panda and sunk into my head, I lost almost 2 1/2 stone and was shocked at how thin I looked. Every thing was a shock because I was looking at a stranger, I cried for that person who died yet I'm beginning to cheer for the person who is free ( ALMOST) from those nightmare years. I'm still thinking about him and I often want to see him just to tell him what he did. Wrong move, I know but the anger is a bit like the tide it doesn't stop.

    • @joseenoel8093
      @joseenoel8093 Місяць тому +2

      It'll wane, I promise, cut your losses count your blessings, nights can be awful, I sometimes listen to rain and birds to fall asleep, everyone ruminates, you must stay no contact, keep watching and learning, your health is in your hands!

    • @AmandaPryar
      @AmandaPryar 20 днів тому

      @@joseenoel8093 Yes in the end it's down to my strength and inner peace; one day I will find both, that's a promise to myself 🙂

  • @SandraNwankwo-wg8vb
    @SandraNwankwo-wg8vb Місяць тому +33

    Noticed the same thing with my aunty. Married a man she shouldn’t have married and years later, I saw that her face is inflamed with pimples and emerging pimples.
    Her face is a lot better now though. She left him of course

  • @sacredwaters9
    @sacredwaters9 Місяць тому +15

    This is true. However, I didn't look older but I am always tense. Now older I still look younger than my age but trauma is on my face. My eyes look "old". They don't have the spark they used to and I do have that downward mouth now but it's not significant enough for me to look OLD. I just look weary. I hate it.
    So, now I'm doing my best to reverse my nervous system and the trauma. Such good advice about noticing facial tension, jaw tension. Such good advice. Thank you Danish.❤

  • @zindhagizindabadh1006
    @zindhagizindabadh1006 Місяць тому +16

    Danish, you are always and always correct.I agree 💯

  • @shauntib4313
    @shauntib4313 Місяць тому +4

    The abuse from my adult narcissistic son caused me to have dark circles & puffy sunken eyes with a look of stressed distraction and deep confusion & sadness, I’ve been no contact for 10 months- working on my health, however the deep grief of realization the beloved guy I thought he was isn’t - so grief is still very overwhelming as also I’ve lost my young grandson going no contact & haven’t seen him in 2 & 1/2 years now - heartbreaking 💔 😢 beyond belief. My narc son was so deeply mentally cruel. I had no choice as I was getting physically ill from all his toxic diarrhoea he was projection onto me then calling me toxic, & emotionally immature, & a lot more. Healing is slow but I’m happier not on the receiving end of his verbal abuse. I am hoping in the next years my eyes & face will get less sick looking as the weight of his abuses lifts out of my mind and off my body. I am a blessing & I am loved 🥰

  • @elliesimpson1313
    @elliesimpson1313 Місяць тому +14

    Spot on! I also hunched over for years. Protective mode. I now have better posture than ever before

  • @fillistine
    @fillistine Місяць тому +15

    I struggled for months with a painful jaw. It is STRESS! Stress from enduring abuse from a job. I left the job. And I am slowly recovering!

  • @V1LL1N
    @V1LL1N Місяць тому +14

    I was just considering these things, my jaw always clenched...lines in my forehead from anger and frowning...laughing helps a lot.
    Been praciticing catching myself and then relaxing and breathing and cracking and rubbing and stretching lol while asking what my feeling is in that moment.
    Great video!

  • @vanessas2363
    @vanessas2363 Місяць тому +6

    Yes, i look HAUNTED

  • @liebhaberfreund4470
    @liebhaberfreund4470 Місяць тому +14

    I had an eye lift a year ago. When I went for a follow-up appointment with the aesthetic surgeon a year later, he asked me, “What happened to you? Your entire lower face has sagged.” During that year, my narcissistic lover told me After three year we could try having a relationship. When I asked him about it, he said he wasn’t ready for a relationship. I then ended things against my feelings. It felt like I was separating from a part of myself.

  • @annatkinson2197
    @annatkinson2197 Місяць тому +5

    I look sad and like a rabbit caught in the headlights. I dont laugh much now either. But I am moving ever closer to recovery and freedom and God is with me.

  • @dorothycrawley1392
    @dorothycrawley1392 Місяць тому +6

    Both my parents were narcissistic..while in the military my 1st sargent said that I looked "stupid"..he didn't know that I had two "stupid" parents..so yes.. narcissistic abuse can actually change your appearance..

  • @izzy6455
    @izzy6455 Місяць тому +16

    I only realised about a year ago that my resting face is to hold a tight wrinkled brow. It's giving me wrinkles. I am trying to relax as much as possible because this clenching is constant. I grew up with 2 narc parents I was hypervigilant and nervous all the time and that stayed with me because children in particular are learning so the physical body also learns.

  • @Sweet-fn6po
    @Sweet-fn6po Місяць тому +17

    This is absolutely true. It happened to someone close to me. By time the 💩💩💩hit the fan, they didn’t even look like the same person. Their face had drastically changed for the worse.

  • @yuu_miran
    @yuu_miran Місяць тому +9

    Yes. My face is ugly. After suffering from demodecosis for more than a decade and constant narcs around me and stress and sleep exhaustion i look older and horrid. I looked like an angel in childhood, big blue eyes gentle skin and smile. Perhaps its the retribution too

  • @utaka78
    @utaka78 Місяць тому +6

    When i was still with him i once lost so much hair due to the constant arguments and fights.
    Then when we broke up i got two big wrinkles between my eyebrows and my face sagged and i lost like 10kg.
    After i recovered from the breakup i now look better again but it somehow changed my eyes.They seem smaller.
    I massage my face and neck daily.

  • @tinaureta9891
    @tinaureta9891 Місяць тому +6

    Yes!!!! Absolutely! This is very very TRUE DANISH. You speak Correctly! I teach HEALTH, and I see this again and again! And now that I am out of this relationship for 1 year, I see it in OTHER peoples face! It’s incredible and brings me sadness when I see it. I’m so grateful for You. My face is SO MUCH more Naturally beautiful now.
    Heartbreak and COMPLETE CONFUSION was all over my face

    • @kurehanzo
      @kurehanzo Місяць тому

      Ughhh the confusion! That sounds awfully familiar. I was so confused all the time.

  • @user-tn8fu1gx3v
    @user-tn8fu1gx3v Місяць тому +7

    I can see in my mother 's face when my narc father has been harassing her. Swollen eyes drawn cheeks. Its disgusting. Shes stayed with him for 50 yrs has repeatedly thrown her kids under the bus for him. I will never understand this dynamic.

    • @mvbigmagic4048
      @mvbigmagic4048 Місяць тому

      My father enabled my mother's abuse of me. In the end, I couldn't even be with him. She triangulated him against me. So as much as I pitied my dad, he chose that witch over his own daughter who cared about him. It's karma. That's the only way I can explain it. He also left his mother and his older sisters alone, and let my mom bully him into not supporting his old-maid sisters who were his mother's caregivers. My mother bled me so bad, I had no more money left to give them. So in the end, my dad died the same way he allowed his sisters to die -- alone. And there was nothing could do about it, because he wouldn't leave my mom..... I understand it was because my dad was neglected as a child. His mother gave him a milk mother, because I'm positive she had some kind of post-partum depression. Knowing his past, I'm trying SO HARD to make sure I do not continue this cycle of abuse. Because it spans generations. :( My dad's health and his face changed so much when my mom forced me to leave him with her. Every video call, he looked worse and worse. My mother sucked the life out of him and starved him. Even Adult Protective Services couldn't help him.

    • @drchristineobrien9704
      @drchristineobrien9704 Місяць тому +1

      @@mvbigmagic4048because they needed him to say he was being abused. I’ve learned that the hard way too.

  • @fightingpaindaily2265
    @fightingpaindaily2265 Місяць тому +8

    I was just talking to someone last night about how my eyes have had bags under them since age 3. That is when I first remember going to daycare and having issues with my original narc. They got worse after I married a narc and now I’m worried they will always remain, even after I am able to break free!

  • @k-t2498
    @k-t2498 Місяць тому +6

    This explains a lot..My face always looks tense and as soon as i left my ex i was a lot better off and more happier and felt free..Took me some years to release and accept my circumstances..But I do suffer anxiety..My face sometimes will clench up and i will lose my voice in fear at times.I am forced to coparent with them and so i still have contact..

  • @MixhaelZ.
    @MixhaelZ. Місяць тому +9

    Yes, my mom is a narcissist and my aunts was the person that put me onto your UA-cam channel. Very grateful for it. I had no idea about the information that I know now. I also have the tightness in my eyes and my face every day when I used to go to school people would say why do you look so angry because I would tense up and I was so alert to ready in the morning for her before going to school every day when it was just me and her before she would drop me off shock and
    Disrupt and ruin my entire day every single day as I was in her presence I guess that’s how she prepared me to start my day in life every day I cannot still understand how my mother could be like this her own child. But I’m still learning a lot from your videos. Appreciate it. Keep on doing what you’re doing. You’re helping a lot of people out there.

    • @mimap275
      @mimap275 Місяць тому +5

      Ur not alone , mine drained me I started to look haggard, I was so fresh without her, now I'm 1 month no contact Im back to my fresh looking self 😊😢 too many crises, issues then her wanting u to be the mother and solve it for her 😮😮

    • @mvbigmagic4048
      @mvbigmagic4048 Місяць тому +2

      @@mimap275 Precisely. They want you to be the parent, but then they still want to control you. It's insane. Stuck in the mentality of a toddler. Actually I've seen more mature toddlers than my mother. :( It only gets worse as they get older. Mine has dementia now, and logic has completely gone out the window, and she can no longer keep track of all the lies she's told me through the years.

    • @mimap275
      @mimap275 Місяць тому

      @@mvbigmagic4048 so sad 😞 but they reap wat they sow

  • @marijkevandermeer2772
    @marijkevandermeer2772 Місяць тому +4

    Yes, I noticed positive changes..i have always been a younger looking woman but i became a very worried woman...

  • @jostafford3367
    @jostafford3367 Місяць тому +3

    This is 100 per cent true !!! I met the narc when I was 50 I was fit , looked after myself , got hair done , nails . Looked good for 50 . Fast forward to end of relationship now 58 I’m 30 kilos overweight , grey wire hair , no nails , face is like a 80 year old . It’s horendous the impact of this abuse on the entire system . Tbh I do t know if I will recover .

  • @KosmicN.
    @KosmicN. Місяць тому +3

    I can confirm this is actually true. A picture was taken of me when I was with my ex-narc and I looked like an actual corpse. Literally. No cap. Casket ready corpse. I can say I’m back to beautiful with some hair loss. The body does remember.

  • @DGP8630
    @DGP8630 Місяць тому +5

    Too much stress....😢😮

  • @ajayalalaj5581
    @ajayalalaj5581 Місяць тому +4

    Yes it happened to me, my face became really bad and my health was in danger of being in constant stress 😔 I left her without a closer if I wait for an closure, I would have been mentally peralized. So I will advise just go no contact no matter how much you love them they will not get better.you will suffer more so it is better to stop giving love to an demonic soul. I stayed 4 months away from my sociopath lover and I feel good . But she is still hoovering me. Just forget and let go . It's better in every way.

  • @mimap275
    @mimap275 Місяць тому +5

    So true Danish 😢😢

  • @clairestone1685
    @clairestone1685 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you Danish. I always wondered why people kept telling me I looked sad. My parents were both narcissists. Now I understand how their behaviour affected my appearance!

  • @rahulm2827
    @rahulm2827 Місяць тому +3

    I'm happy to read that so many ppl had positive facial changes after leaving their narcissist.
    I do have facial issues though after even 15 years of no contact. And whenever I'm with other ppl outside my work, they notice it first thing in the morning. And they reach out to me and ask me whats wrong.
    My face is quite puffy and sometimes even just plain ugly lol. The cheeks are blown out of proportion and my eyes are always lazy, boring and sunken. I need to prepare for work by praying in the morning.
    Prayer really does change my face. Otherwise my colleagues would definitely see it and maybe avoid me.

  • @hamdagarbo5839
    @hamdagarbo5839 Місяць тому +1

    This is so true. I look away older than my age and if I see anyone who knew me before this marriage asks what happened to me.

  • @lisacummins5135
    @lisacummins5135 Місяць тому +3

    You covered it all, exactly. The choking too.... being silenced.

  • @laviarun1010
    @laviarun1010 Місяць тому +1

    Yes. My appearance changed due to abuse. Am looking sad always loosing my weight. Absolutely you are correct 💯.

  • @petalflowers4765
    @petalflowers4765 Місяць тому

    Danish, you are correct about this, it's the constant everyday stress, emotional pain, pressure, worry, unhappiness, and waiting for the other shoe to drop. It all takes a toll in our bodies and on our faces. The lack of sleep, anger, and crying makes the eyes puffy, red and swollen. Its horrible to go through and it takes a while to heal back to normal. Watch the salt, sugar, and fats found in the comfort foods that help us feel better.

  • @nora.354
    @nora.354 Місяць тому

    This was the hardest one of all for me. My family of origin wanted to destroy my appearance also. 3- 1/2 years no contact. I knew it would return. I couldn't even look in the mirror. I kept ignoring it. I just kept saying, "its not true. Its narcissist energy." That was a hard one. It has restored 85 percent. The narcissists energy is so foul to the life force. Thank you Danish

  • @tonewilhelmsen2425
    @tonewilhelmsen2425 Місяць тому +5

    Thank You!

  • @donnaT-ti8vj
    @donnaT-ti8vj Місяць тому +2

    Some coworkers wd tell me they wer hesitant to approach me becuz of my expression; always tense & on guard. I didn't realize it. For those that can't leave for whteva reason, u hv to become indifferent & find ur inner peace. I kno it's easier said than done but it can be done. Peace to you all

  • @HomeFrendsten
    @HomeFrendsten Місяць тому +4

    Narcsts make innocent people suffer

  • @TanyaKatherine
    @TanyaKatherine 5 днів тому

    Danish, I have listened to so many narc abuse coaches since 2019. Not one has blown me away like you have with your content. You answer each and every of my questions. I know you probably don't have time to read each comment...but I profusely THANK YOU for your work. This very topic has been bouncing inside my head for years, unaware of it...yet noticing these changes in my face...Not once have I concluded that it could come from the trauma from my narc. YES, I looked 37 at 18.... and then I got better....for a few years and then I got worse again and looked way older again. I was 28 and looked like I was in my 50s (nothing wrong with 50s, or age 37 lol) but I looked sunken in eyes, massive weight gain, curved spine, chunky moon shaped face from no sleep. I still kind of have that droopy look to my face, and I KNOW it is from all the terror, stress, crying, trauma, grief, shock, uncomfortability!!!!! I need to send you photos of me...before and after photos...you would literally be able to tell which years I was being abused worse and which years I was getting free...
    This concept you brought up is a huge KEY and unlocking to understanding all of this and more.I am so grateful, sitting here, still stuck and financially controlled by the narc I live with...and your videos give me hope. Hope I will be healthier and free one day. One day very soon. Thank you so much.

  • @melmatthews5876
    @melmatthews5876 Місяць тому +1

    With me it is that my eyes are very sad looking, and I don't really smile anymore. I do frown a lot though. I managed to get the narcissist out of my life five years ago but people tell me that the light went out of my eyes. It is despicable what these narcissists are getting away with.

  • @nikkiross128b
    @nikkiross128b Місяць тому +2

    I have TMJ and actually it was the TMJ physiotherapist who helped me in trying to understand the cause of my tension. Did I have a lot of stress in my life? Not really. Was I a control freak in the house, cleaning up all day? Not at all. Was my relationship not ok? Not that I was aware of. After months I started to realize my relationship was really bad, causing me a lot of stress, and after I left I learned everything about covert narcissism. Still TMJ, using massage gun on my cheeks, still high blood pressure, using medication, but getting better and more relaxed day by day, although slowly.

  • @semmaville
    @semmaville Місяць тому +5

    that got my attention!!!

  • @joelledaou8405
    @joelledaou8405 Місяць тому

    This is absolutely so true and i can't believe someone is finally talking about it. After a couple of months of leaving my abusive narcissistic husband of 16 years I did notice my face and body felt better. And most of my family and clients would tell me I'm glowing. The inflammation went down. I would do my usual skincare before and my face would still look tired. Now I'm 40 and people think I'm 30.😊

  • @angelawoodward2259
    @angelawoodward2259 Місяць тому +1

    My face has what makeup artists call a marionette expression…just what you describe….also, I have eyebrows above my eyebrows! My eyes are no hooded…they have awnings. Most people, even doctors and medical personnel , think I look young for my age. I think they need glasses. I just turned 82, and have left vanity behind. I have left the narcissist behind,also. But there is yet a lot to overcome. By the grace of the Lord God I press forward to His calling. He made me for better things than the tragic ones I choose! Thank you for sharing you insights.💜

  • @theabsinaz5
    @theabsinaz5 Місяць тому

    Yes, I agree. After 30 years with my narcissist, I have noticed how my smile is crooked, my eyes look wild and weird, I look & feel incredibly exhausted, I have TMJ, constant tension in my neck & shoulders, my hair has fallen out significantly and I have developed several health conditions that doctors cannot seem to figure out. I left my narc 2 months ago and I can only hope that my face & body can heal and go back to normal now.

  • @NoliesonLysatya
    @NoliesonLysatya Місяць тому +3

    My hair suffered the most. Lost so much of it plus premature greying. At one point, my Ex exclaimed gleefully that I’m balding, as if it made him happy. Within weeks of leaving him, I noticed new hair growth and less hair fall.

    • @cassiebennet4262
      @cassiebennet4262 Місяць тому +2

      Omg I think more and more people are recognizing unnatural extreme hair fall. I'm so glad it's being talked about now.

    • @mvbigmagic4048
      @mvbigmagic4048 Місяць тому +1

      This happened to me. I took care of my aging mother and father for months. I started having more gray hair of a sudden! I thought it was just me getting old. But I went no-contact with my malignant narcissistic mother after my father's death, and.... weirdness. My gray hair is going away and growing back in my previous color. It's crazy. These narcissists really do suck the LIFE out of you.

  • @C.B.-th3vz
    @C.B.-th3vz Місяць тому

    Yes! I looked and felt at least 20 yrs older. I'm out and have been working on my nervous system and giving self face and neck massage. I'm taking life one day at a time, and finding grace. It's a slow sustainable process. ❤

  • @SheldonBrown567
    @SheldonBrown567 Місяць тому +1

    As a family gathering drew near, I would start to get black under the eyes, and my eyes would get bloodshot, due to lack of sleep. Then after the party, poor sleep would continue, with stomach problems as well, for two nights. So a family gathering would cause me to look terrible for 4 or 5 days. We would have a gathering about once every month. Took a heavy toll on me. No contact for two years now. Doing much better now.😊

  • @b8akaratn
    @b8akaratn Місяць тому +2

    Yep, i have had physical tense-up in the face, like what what you're describing, Danish. May i also add that we're prone to grinding our teeth when sleeping. I have a night guard that's been issued to me because of the abuse. (... don't ask if i use it regularly..🤭😅)

  • @jennyjenjen9180
    @jennyjenjen9180 Місяць тому

    He is absolutely correct. Three years without narcissists in my life and I look 10 years younger

  • @ANUBISd88
    @ANUBISd88 Місяць тому

    I used to say to people how my face changed and they didn't believe me if they didn't already knew me. Highly tensed facial nerves, my chewing muscles were much bigger, my whole face full of redness and inflammation, swollen eyes, hair loss and breakage, excessive teeth grinding that caused harm, I lost so much weight although I was already very thin, etc..
    Another very accurate information from this channel!

  • @SJ-yg1bh
    @SJ-yg1bh Місяць тому

    Once after talking with narc, looked into the mirror and got the shock of my life on seeing my face. The realization saved me from going mental.

  • @shaneclinger5888
    @shaneclinger5888 Місяць тому +7

    If you're a empath that knows how to work with energy a little bit you can put a white light around your narcissist which will keep all their negative energy in! That's how I slept well for 20 years!

  • @happiness2u67
    @happiness2u67 Місяць тому

    Every single muscle is tensed up. Every single really. Thanks Danish

  • @Kaal.raatri
    @Kaal.raatri Місяць тому

    The phase where I went through extreme narcisstic abuse. I was so strongly determined to "fight it all alone".. I looked 26. While my biological age is +12 years older. I never loved myself. Trained to be a Beautician and kept serving my narc mom's toxic friends. It would sound like an compliment but I was being used for literally free if cost. I suddenly lost weight. (From 78 to 53) Within a month when I suddenly felt uneasy after returning from my mother's place and had to call Ambulance myself and by the time I reached hospital. I was in coma. For 23 days straight. Unexplained.. and unbelievable.. I wasn't "well"..hence the cook/server/maid/punching bag that I was.. suddenly was left alone very next day after discharge. Weight loss did contribute to me looking young. While all my life I was looking 35 as an 16 yr old.
    But it's not the "Abuse".. but the "Post No contact journey" that was excruciating.. skin went horrible. And in under ten months I looked sick.. shrunken.. disassociated and lost. Trying to recover. But putting on perfect image with agony loneliness and sorriws hidden beneath all the flashy facades.

  • @user-er7fk1fz5p
    @user-er7fk1fz5p Місяць тому

    Yeah I experienced this in my narcissistic family .after leaving my husband and no contact with my family, I received compliments that I am now looking fresh and shining. Earlier I had more pimples and dark circles and my face was stressed

  • @SteEle3009
    @SteEle3009 Місяць тому

    Yes Danish, you're right. My leaps too, muscles are gone.
    I can not recognize My self in the mirror.

  • @SanneSanne-n7h
    @SanneSanne-n7h Місяць тому

    Yes!! Older and a bit mad/ bewildered and i suddenly have anger lines between my eyes!! Also i started to walk as if i carry a stone on my back like an old person, the pain in the neck and my back are excruciating.

  • @evabertoluzzi68
    @evabertoluzzi68 Місяць тому +4

    I’m convinced that my acne is related to the narcissistic abuse I received from my mother. Any advice on how to stop scratching my face? I feel like I’ve tried everything.

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Місяць тому +2

      Look for an experienced dermatologist, try consulting several of them.

  • @MakedaMix
    @MakedaMix Місяць тому

    Thank you so much Danish. I have to admit, I'm looking better than ever now, without the narcissist. And I am feeling better as well. Your videos help with the recovery.

  • @kurehanzo
    @kurehanzo Місяць тому

    Yes! This is true and I can attest to this. My face became puffy and looked older than my age, dull and lost any trace of glow. My hair started falling out. I sing, and during what felt like the devaluation phase suddenly I couldn't sing properly, somehow it always came out wrong, It felt like my body was fighting me instead of giving me support for my vocal. Later on I realized it was because my body tensed up and it was tensing up ALL. THE. TIME. This was the hypervigilance state. I still get muscle aches around my shoulder and the back of my neck up to this day.
    My singing came back just fine after the relationship ended, and my face got back to looking younger and it even started to glow again.

  • @paulinegicheru8039
    @paulinegicheru8039 Місяць тому

    U are very very right!! Once one is healed God "melt" it all!

  • @romanastrasheim5226
    @romanastrasheim5226 Місяць тому

    All true Sir.
    My mouth, ....
    My shoulders raised ...
    To conceal stress, I had my tongue flat in my mouth side to side causing them to become raw at the sides ...😰😰
    When younger years ago, I always felt like crying, so my boss said to me one morning, ...' please pull your face right! ' ...Those words spoken that morning was a shock to me and helped me to show less emotion on my face .. me becoming more neutral looking.

  • @cathykerenga9370
    @cathykerenga9370 Місяць тому

    This is very true, I am a narcissist victim, my faced changed a lot, I looked completely different, my facial is shaggy and I looked older .

  • @Equanimous-6
    @Equanimous-6 Місяць тому

    In my 8 years of relationship, where i realised the abuse after 4 years, i developed dark circles in my face. I started looking more old, always stressed out. The dark circles kept on spreading around the face. Did lot of treatment but nothing helped.
    After the break up automatically my face started healing on its own without any further treatment.
    They are all evil in the world and it strange that these creatures are available in great numbers. U don't easily identify them until its too late 😢😢😢

  • @rianajoubert8515
    @rianajoubert8515 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you so much! You help me understand things, and how to handle this terrible stress!

  • @serenaluce
    @serenaluce Місяць тому +1

    100% true! Before it was impossible for me to relax and I usually had this facial expression! The other people who thought that I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth in such an "exemplary perfect family" where everybody just "lived for the child" could never get it why I'm so stressed out and "ungrateful" if they had had much less that God gave to me!...The problem is that many years after you leave abusers you can still have the same facial expression as you are just used to it and your muscles are so tense! I've found the same exercises on YT to relax my jaws as you even don't know on what part of your face you have to work first as it just feels all "stony" and hurt but then it really changes step by step...I already have a great result as before I came to the dentist's clinic for teeth cleaning and hygienists told me that my lower jaw and mandibular are too tense and recently I came to another clinic for the same procedure and they wanted to make more money on me and others on their " special jaw treatment". They asked me to open my mouth as wide as possible and those "health care providers" know special points where to put pressure where it's most painful in ordinary people and then say: "You see! If you don't undergo treatment in our clinic right away you are screwed forever!", but she pushed all my facial points harder and harder including salivary glands and asked if it's painful but I'm used to massaging them regularly and it wasn't painful at all, so they had to leave me alone! :-) Maybe my observations will be useful to somebody else as well :-) Otherwise some providers can push those points this way that their patients will jump in their seat with pain and will pay more money for "treatment". It happened to me too but I refused their "care" and preferred to find some exercises first to try if they can help! :-)

  • @Veronika.Syrotkina
    @Veronika.Syrotkina Місяць тому

    I’ve also noticed changes in my face after a couple of years of relationship with a narcissist. Additionally, struggling with a narcissistic mother for my whole life.
    Thank you so much for helpful exercises. I will definitely try to do them. I hope, that will help. 🙏🏼❤️🙂

  • @alwayssparks9165
    @alwayssparks9165 Місяць тому

    You always explain with so much clarity and confidence, I think you're out of this world Danish 🖤

  • @rosered1720
    @rosered1720 Місяць тому +1

    Like how Medusa became a snake-haired Gorgon with stone-creating eyes, after once being a beautiful priestess, because of Athena's and Poseidon's narcissistic abuse of her.

  • @JessAnonymous
    @JessAnonymous Місяць тому

    Danish you dont know how bad i love you 😭😭😭 God bless you a billion ton. I cant wait for narc abuse to be recognized in therapy and in LAW

  • @Bianca2802
    @Bianca2802 Місяць тому

    I lost weight and my face began sagging. And everyone noticed it..
    Stress is the worst for your body,health and appearence.
    He never screamed at me or sth but left me constantly in a state of confusion. Saying he loves me,and then dissapeared for one or two days, giving cheap excuses. Made promises he never kept. Acted sweet and kind and next day completely cold..😢

  • @anthonywhite6530
    @anthonywhite6530 Місяць тому +2

    Truth

  • @angeldee7287
    @angeldee7287 Місяць тому +3

    Bels palsy
    Thoracic outlet syndrome
    Fibromyalgia

  • @aparna1170
    @aparna1170 Місяць тому

    Most Narcs smile at us friendly people. If we smile back then they start working on our confidence till we feel like nobody or pretend to be nobody. They want to instill fear in happy people

  • @learngain2659
    @learngain2659 Місяць тому

    My narcissist mother always wants me to be miserable, look miserable and powerless

  • @user-oh4fp5rj4n
    @user-oh4fp5rj4n Місяць тому +1

    Thank you soooo very much.Peace

  • @carlamitchell466
    @carlamitchell466 Місяць тому

    Yes! My pastor and a friend said that your skin is really dark. and my face was wrinkle and my eyes was puffy. And swollen. I had to go see a Dermatologist.. Haven't seen my ex in 8 months and my body is finally healing, my son told me yesterday that I look like the myself again.

  • @liz.8341
    @liz.8341 Місяць тому

    This is so accurate, it is confirmed.