Psychologists have done studies that csa from mothers is often linked to a need for emotional validation. This IS 100% as creepy as it feels. Even if nothing sinister is going on, the potential is very much there.
The fact that so many parents are okay with this emotional incest is insane. These kids are gonna have some SERIOUS issues when they get older, one way or another
that's the only way it should feel. it is sick and nasty that the speak about their kids this way, if I ever heard my cousin's mom or friend's mom talk like this I would probably call the cops for them being a predator
I'm genuinely so concerned about the daughters of that woman who justifies her son hitting them. That woman is raising an abuser and victims of domestic abuse at the same time. How can you ruin so many young lives and feel proud about it.
@@edithputhy4948Yeah, thats a more normal behavior. Kids will get physical as they try to figure out how to communicate and whats okay and not. And parenting isnt black n white. Some spank kids who hit, some tell em go in the corner! But the mom this persons talkin about is just messed up. Who thinks letting their kids beat on their other kids just bc he had a "bad day" is okay? Thats just- so backwards
Im concerned more about how one can fully admit online to domestic violence going on in their home and being complaisant about it and not be arrested for child abuse and neglect
Boy moms took a trend that was originally "teaching my daughter how to do traditionally male skills that girls arent often taught, so that she never feels relient on a man" and turned it into "teaching my son to be Even More Critical of Women"
I also saw a version of it that was “teaching my son traditionally feminine things so you’re son can’t get away with not doing them” which was a fun spin on it
it is so painfully misoginistic and a clear look at how these moms see women and themselves, and they can't even see the irony. the videos about girls are "teaching my daughter skills that will prevent her from entering an abusive relationship with a man in the future" while boy mom's version of it is just "teaching my son to cook/clean so he doesn't need your daughter" they are giving their sons such terrible messages and most of the time they don't even realize the damage
@@DollarDudsIt shouldn’t be called the Jocasta complex, in the same way the Oedipus complex is a bad name. Considering they unalived themselves in despair and disgust after they found out they were mother and son, they don’t fit the concepts. They clearly hated the idea of being incestuous, and didn’t intend to be. And they wouldn’t have been if it weren’t for a messed up prophecy. So I think people should just keep calling them Boy Moms, and not drag Jocasta into a situation she wouldn’t actually willingly be okay with.
There was a HUGE red flag in this being normalized with Dads and daughters, then it got turned into dad's even being near their daughters being turned into pedos on others insta stories. Fix these crazy moms, people in their lives! Fix em before they're insane
It is, and it reminds me of a Tiktok. There's especially a picture of that Tiktok that circulated. It was a high schooler, a guy, in his (American) football "attire" and on the field, with what looked like his girlfriend hugging him (with her arms AND legs). But in reality, that was his mom ! When you watch the Tiktok it's obvious when you see her face. Also, the son looks super uncomfortable the whole time (a loooong time) she's hugging him. When she finally stood back up, he looked so relieved. Honestly, I'm very concerned for him because that was very creepy. Why are you hugging your son as if you're his girlfriend ??? It's honestly disturbing. I hope he's fine. I also hope he's her only kid because she probably gave him enough bagage to deal with without needing to make someone else suffer.
Not even just emotional incest in some these. To really add to the injury theirs favoritism mixed in. And when the girls of these boy moms realize they'll take it out on their brother rather than blaming the 'mother' and it'll become a worsening loop
@@greenfelix7065it is emotional incest. Also about the girls blaming the boy,do you really think these boys grow up with any sense of right or wrong? All of it is bad. The kids are not at fault for how shitty their parents are.
@@Suited_Nat I was agreeing it was emotional incest but adding the girls would resent their brother. I should've added until they're older, mid teens to early adulthood likely. Kids can sense favoritism easily so could resent their brother for a decade or more before realizing their hatred should be to their mother not brother.
@@Suited_Nat They said "not _just_" meaning that emotional incest isn't the only issue that is present. And I agree. Siblings of the favorite child harbor hatred towards the favored sibling 90% of th4 time and take out their pain on them. I've seen it time and time again. These non-favored children completely blame the child that's put on pedestal, up until they're much older and wiser (usually in their 20s-30s) and realize the real perp is the parents and then either go non-contact or minimum contact with their parents.
Also wanted to add, the relationship between those siblings rarely ever get fully amended, unfortunately. The resentment tends to stay even after they become adults and have worked through their childhood trauma.
if someone ever told me they let their daughters get hit by their brothers because "oh i mean maybe their having a hard day-" NO. that could lead to your boy learning that apparently hitting people is okay and not only that but if your boy is having a bad day cant you just comfort him or try to help him in general instead of just letting them do something that could be considered a crime if they did it randomly in public? pure favoritism😨
Freud has been debunked quite roundly for almost every view he ever had- he was a product of his era- Victorian era, to be exact, one fraught with puritanical views and chasteness above all else. His ‘penis envy’ concept is so completely and utterly absurd, but for some reason people still use it as some proven theory.
My grandmother was a boy mom. My mom had 3 sisters and a brother, which was favored till my grandmothers death - she literally was keeping all the money she got from her retirement on his account, then live poorly and made my mom shopping grocery for her. One of my mom's sister died of cancer, and one of the last thing she said in her life was "My mother have never loved me".
Oooh, i think i saw the video of that pipeline you're talking about. I think the ytber's name is salem? She said that the "pick me" women end up becoming "boy moms" as a way to feel satisfied from the lack of attention they feel in their marriages.
I had such a person as a coworker once. Saying stuff like "I wouldn't let my man clean or cook, that's my job as a woman, any man should be glad to have me" (she was a single mum who then liked to date toxic guys) and she's doing the same things to her teenage son. He's going to be a monster and at best will never bring a girl home, I feel already sorry for that hypothetical girl.
I have younger cousins, one male and one female, and I will say they do sometimes hit each other but my aunt is very firm in stopping that and telling them how its wrong.
@@annieandelsieofarendelle3294 As she should. Kids, even ones that like each other, are little balls of emotion and will come at someone swinging if they're upset. That's why you gotta teach them that you don't hit people for no good reason.
Yeah! And, like, for her to be a really good mum she should sit him down, tell him it’s okay that he’s having a bad day and show him that there are healthier ways to release his anger, and that his sisters have nothing to do with that and he should respect them, even if he’s having a bad day. Like this, she’s teaching him how to respect boundaries and a healthier way to deal with his emotions.
God, the mom who lets her son hit her daughters makes me so angry. You're not only teaching your daughters that it's acceptable for the men in their life to take their emotions out on them, but also that the authorities figures that are supposed to help them, will side with him instead of intervening. And then we wonder why people get/stay in abusive relationships.
Does anyone know the lady's account, like does anyone know if these kids are actually safe, or is she still literally profiting off of letting her son abuse her other kids because that sounds like a whole police investigation waiting to happen if it hasn't already, she openly said she lets her son hit her kids and she doesn't care, that's not tolerable at all, they're probably traumatized, and i feel so bad
@keenalovescats it's Anna Saccone-Joly. She and her husband have been around for years being controversial. They used to family daily vlog if that gives you an idea of their vibe...
I was one of those daughters, and you never really get over it. LPT boy moms: your girls will never, ever forget you making sure they knew you loved their brother more than them. So maybe don't be surprised when they keep their distance as adults.
Every time i see a "boy mom" video or post, I'm reminded of this reddit post where a man ditched his anniversary dinner to help his mom with menial household tasks. He returned home well after the dinner was over to find that his wife had left him with their daughter. Several updates later, the mom had stalked and harassed them to the point of being arrested and OP had uncovered repressed memories of csa by his mother in therapy. It was long, sad, and disturbing, and it really drove home how long-reaching and deep-running the effects of emotional incest really are. These moms may not be touching their boys, but they're warping their perception of what is appropriate and what familial love should be in a way that takes decades of hard, therapeutic work to overcome. It disgusts me to no end.
@@ruqayyahqadri8180I tried to find it for you but I am unable to. I know for a fact it has been posted on Bestofredditorupdates multiple times. Try the JustNoMil subreddit though, it has multiple stories of boy moms but from the wife's perspective.
I remember that story. Iirc, the incest wasn't just emotional, she had molested her son as a teen. She also sent his wife an envelope of her pubic hair at one point.
So, you start as a "Not Like Other Girls" girl in your teens, you become a "Pick Me" as a young woman, you transition to "Toxic Boy Mom" when you have your first child and then you hit the "Monster M-I-L." Makes sense to me!
Watching the women look at the camera with that insane glaze over their eyes while the young child is making pizza and thinking he's just having fun with his mommy is unbelievably disturbing and my heart BREAKS for those boys when they get older and realize they were just being used for clicks and views for their insensitive hateful mothers.
It felt just like in a movie where a girl is getting defensive about her boyfriend and trying to threaten another woman (without the boyfriend knowing). Soooo creepy.
As the daughter of a "girl dad," whose mom was a "boy mom," I've experienced that this kinda of behavior leads quickly to abuse and SA. So glad you're calling out these people Update: Thank you all for your kind words. I wish I was doing better, but unfortunately I am still be stalked and harassed by my "dad." The law doesn't care about victims.
From one internet stranger to another, friendly reminder that you did not deserve any abuse you received, it was not your fault, and healing takes time. Good job on realizing what was happening, I hope you're in a safer place now
Being a “daddy’s kid” or a “mommy’s kid” is okay. That doesn't mean that the other parent or the other siblings aren't loved. But these people give the feeling that the child would die without them and that it is normal to behave like that. Sometimes girls are obviously portrayed as something more defenseless with “it’s just a joke” videos... just sick
My fiance had to teach me to cook- and now it's something I love doing for her! Since she's physically disabled and can't stand for very long- I now do most of the cooking for our little family!
My favorite response to the “I’m teaching my son to cook so he’s not impressed by your daughter’s frozen lasagna” was a mom who responded “your son should be impressed by my daughter’s microwaved lasagna, she’s 4 and doesn’t even know how to work the microwave yet” 😂
also all thats gonna do is help the guy get a girl with no cooking skills since he can use it to impress them. He will be impressed by something else she brings to the table lol.
Filming herself glaring at the camera while she's teaching her son to cook instead of living in the moment and being an actually loving mom to her child. Real nice, Karen. He's going to find this video in a few years and be so disappointed.
Imagine having a pleasant memory of your mom teaching you to cook so you go searching for that memory only to realize your mother only did so to get internet clout and be a misogynist.
AFAIK it was a reaction to a trend of "dusty sons". Where they did that cooking as well, but with the caption saying that they teach their daughters but to expect the minimum or less and the sons to be able to take care of themselves
I always forget that part. These videos will be online forever. Kids will grow up one day and see them. Imagine growing up looking to your mother as this amazing role model and a possible blue print for the woman you'd want to marry and then find out she's a lunatic who hates literally every other female on the planet and would rather keep you all to herself.
You're right! If I had a son, I'd teach him to cook so he can fend for himself when I'm not around, and who knows, maybe use it as an outlet like I do?
Subtly also hints she'll be the kind of mom who ignores her daughter's wants and designs the wedding to be the way she likes it. On the extreme end, may also dress in white on the day and make her daughter's wedding all about her
7:00 y’all my mom used to sing songs to me. But it was shit like I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack, a song written by a mother to her daughter, these moms singing romance songs to their sons is just EUGH. Freud would have a FEILD DAY wit them!!!
As a mother of three young boys, I *despise* being called a "boy mom" due to people like this. I want my boys to grow up to be respectful, kind, and happy with a partner in the future and I won't view them "breaking up with me". I am their MOTHER, not a partner. It gives major ick when I see these types of moms in real life and online.
@@p.c6175 There are 2 boy moms: the sane and incent I know 2 sane boy moms that actually teach their sons and daughters equally, 1 of them is fixing their relationship with their eldest daughter so I hope they're doing okay
I have 3 boys too and when someone calls me a "boy mom" responding "don't say that" is just a reflex. I'm not getting clumped with these women who don't like themselves to a point of emotional incest.
@@hippiethot1247I don't even tell people the gender of my child usually because as soon as I say " my son" people get weird. I only have one child right now, but I'd literally poke out my own eyes before id teach him to hate other women. I would be ecstatic if my son found love, and I'd be incredibly embarrassed if my son treated his future partner badly because of me.
"boy moms" and "girl dads" honestly just freak me out. the idea of a parent being so madly protective over their child to the point where they wont even let them have friends of the opposite gender- because their "only love" is their parent- (and in most cases i've seen many boy moms/girl dads automatically assume "oh, my child has a friend of the opposite gender, this is a romantic relationship") is honestly pretty scary to think about, anyone else agree? edit: forgot to mention something. theres a line between being protective of your kids, and straight up obsession. being protective of your kids can be good if it isn't taken too far, as then it becomes obsession and unhealthy overprotection... glad to see funky do a video on this topic, been waiting for something like this for a while. great job as always!
as a daughter of a "boy mom", I've never stopped questioning her reasoning for the unwavering favoritism between me and my brother. I never hated myself more.
You are so valuable and the fact your mum can’t see that is despicable. Your mother is the same girl who hates to see other beautiful women thrive, and its her loss. You deserve to be loved and appreciated🩷
please don't hate yourself because someone who was supposed to care for you didn't do her job at all. everyone in this world deserves love. everyone. you will find it in someone else.
The “teaching my son” thing always irked me. The original trend (Girl Parents) started out to not only callout Fathers who refuse to bond with their daughters cause it’s too “girly” but also to teach young girls to carry themselves with confidence and self-assurance. And it turned into….this…
The og concept sounds deserved considering that’s how the relationship with my father went-man wouldn’t even watch movies because it wasn’t live sports-but how did it turn into, whatever this is?
There’s also an Indian woman who does the trend to raise her son with emotional intelligence and empathy towards other women in his life. These “boy moms” ruined it.
This trend is so bizarre to me, my mom treated me and my brother equally and was excited when he met his now-wife and moved out. Why on earth would you not want your child to become a functional adult with a loving partner? Children are not validation machines that stay five years old forever. The goal is to guide them into becoming their own person separate from you, not cling to them because your own self-image is fragile as glass.
Exactly, I also doubt they would like to take care of a 45 years old child. They are all : "never have a girlfriend, stay with mommy".But it is because they imagine their son staying young. I don't think they will have the same speech with a grown ass men sitting in their house at 40+ while they are 70, because : "it is better to stay with mommy". Actually, few weeks ago, in Italy, a woman has put her 2 sons (adults men) in justice to force them out of her house. They didn't want to leave. I won't be surprised if they were raised as mommy's boy.
I know I will have a hard time when my kids grow up and move out, but I also know that's what they're supposed to, my whole job as a parent is to help them prepare for that. I want them to have the things they want for their own futures and lives, and if that includes a partner and children of their own, the last thing I would want to do is make that harder for them to have by acting possessive and competitive for the attention of my adult child.
Me (not a boy) and my brother (a boy) were treated unequally, but that's because our minds work differently. It's not because of our genders. Example: we've both been taught to cook, because it's a good life skill to be able to cook for yourself. But I needed less help learning than he did, so I got less help. I preferred it that way.
The, "ITS A BABY" bit near the start had me rolling. I was drinking milk and i almost spit it out. Especially loved the skill points gag. LOL you go bestie! Also the mom that included the, your daughter, OR YOUR SON, made me SO, SO HAPPY! I love it when parents realize that not all people are the same and that their child is a person that they have to grow and love, and not someone to shape as they see fit.
Admitting you’re okay with your son hitting your daughter on the Internet where thousands of others can see is actually crazy, the sexist favouritism is disgusting…
i bet the boy is going to be *VERY* abusive and violent if this goes unchecked. it is wrong on a WHOLE OTHER LEVEL to teach your son to abuse women. i would get banned if I said everything I had to say here-
Alright key differences is sibling fights if SHE starts she gets what she gets and age gaps if she is the older sibling hands fly younger sibling keep it to disarming. Sibling fights are different I throw hands with my sister only when she hits me first and she is several years older than me. KEY DIFFERENCES don't be a shit bird don't start shit you can't finish and don't throw the first punch or kick in the case of my dysfunctional sibling relationship. You only have so many people who will fight with you and for you ,treat them well. My sister is my best friend and worst enemy she taught me to fight you need to know how to fight, teach your sibling how to fight when you are the eldest because they will need to know how but be careful not to hurt them too much.
I knew a woman who told me, and we were in no way close enough for this, that she was so happy she had sons because a daughter would be competition for her husband’s love and she was the only pretty princess he was allowed. She was not joking and that is so deeply weird.
@@perpetualsick - When I found out that I was pregnant with a girl I sat and thought about it to see if I felt worried about the daddy-daughter relationship. It was so uncomfortable even considering it tbh.
I felt the same way and it’s worse a way worse feeling when the daughter is not YOURS u be even more scared😭😭and if u alr have anxiety and depression ur fucked.
The first time I heard of this “daughters are competition" thing was fruits basket and I straight up didn’t believe it was real. And it’s way more disturbing to know people actually think like Ren from that show.
@@perpetualsick yep! Both of those phenomena’s are created by internalized misogyny. It’s like by being a “boy mom” instead of a “girl mom” you just “aren’t like the other moms and are one of the boys 🤪”
tinyetoile5503: I mean if you wanna go technical about not all nlogs will become pick mes but all pick mes are already nlog, pick me is the (worse) evolution of nlog!!😅😂
My mom flat out told me "I don't know why, but I've never been able to love my daughters as much as my sons" and she isn't even a toxic boy mom, just very patriarchal
I don't get my mom sometimes she's not a boy mom at all, might be just a wee bit patriarchal. She says stuff like "no matter how much one tries to say otherwise sons and daughters are different, I'll give them equal love but not equal freedom" I was disappointed, never knew mum thought like this, that daughters should not get equal freedom as the sons. She can be very hard to understand sometimes, on one hand she wants me to become an independent career oriented woman whom no one can control. On the other hand she thinks women must marry by the age of 23, max 25 otherwise they become "too old" Seems like she believes in patriarchal values just not the extreme ones, when even the least extreme ones are so hurtful. I believe it's what they are told when growing up, she too might have understood how wrong such parenting is so she tried to fix some things when it was her turn but most of their values never changed due to the decades of brainwashing.
@@strawberryshortcake4345 My mother (and father) exactly. My parents were classic tiger parents who would drill into my head that women had to be educated with a well-paying job. I had to be better and smarter than the boys. But marry a rich man! Also, your brother gets to have as much sex as he wants, and if you dare to have sex once? Then you're a lazy whore who lost all her value and we will kick you out. Now that I moved to my partner's place, my parents beg me to come back. They can rot.
U can reply..exactly mom I too cant love u as much as I love my dad...my love for dad is something else...I can die for him...but I would probably get u off life support if its costing me money...that would hurt her badly...
@@Hezkunyes, I do love them in different ways - the video above is making a point of the “boy-moms” who unfortunately don’t make that distinction. My mother-in-law is one who doesn’t make that distinction, which can make life hard for my husband and his brothers and cause many uncomfortable situations
I had a few girls be impressed with me when they woke up to me cooking breakfast. And I am not talking about Egos in a toaster. Going for round 2 after breakfast.
Both my parents were leaders of a boy scout troop for a time, they encountered many crazy parents. There was a boy who was 17 and didn't know how to tie his own shoes because his mom did it for him, another mom always slept next to him in an all boys tent "in case he got nightmares" even though he was 13 and never had those problems in camp. But I'll never forget this one mom. We were hiking and this one woman was like "OMG did you hear that!? My son is SO SMART! He pointed to a helicopter and called it a helicopter instead of a plane! He is SUCH a genius!" And all my dad said was "I sure hope so [Karen], he is 16 years old."
My father's mom was the exact opposite of this and I respect her so much for it, when she found out my dad cheated on my mom and had a kid behind her back, her immediate reaction was "divorce him and take the house, he loves that goddamn house and you're taking that from him and i'll help" she was also best friends with my mom and they called each other almost daily. RIP grandma you were a real one
Dude. I would be so disappointed if my child cheated on their partner. I plan to show all of my future children the movie Steel Magnolias. Maybe that’ll stop them from being sexist. Lol. It definitely changed my view of gender.
A stark contrast to my toxic mother who - when it was revealed to her that my brother had multiple girlfriends and a 7- year affair - told my sister-in-law that "everyone makes mistakes" and she should forgive him. I had to stop talking to her, she's too insane.
I love the women who are like "reverse boy moms" where they take an effort to teach their sons to empathize with girls and teach them to cook/clean bc its not just a "womans job".
@NapaCat you seriously need to put your little screen down. Leave your house. Talk to people. I've been a parent for over 23 years, and yes, most moms do teach their sons life skills. Your woes are your problem. Stop blaming others for your poor choices in men.
Had to unfriend a childhood bestie when she started refering to her relationship with her son as boyfriend/girlfriend. Extremely disgusting and concerning.
You should probably contact child protective service.. Honestly, but she might be a predator and they have their own type of child they choose to abuse.
First off, gross, eww, I'm gonna be sick. Second, did other people around her react that way (like you did by being WTF) and contact child services because I feel like they should.
Bruh these moms are out of control and these weird videos exploiting their children are so unhealthy on top of it all. These same moms are gonna be the ones who later on cry to everyone about their grown kids never call or visit and they’ll act like they have no idea why. The cosmic ballet goes on
An old friend of mine was the "son" of a toxic, borderline pedophilic "boy mom". She ended up transitioning, and her mom disowned her for it. Last I heard, her mom resorted to alcoholism and was dating a guy half her age. I know its a sample size of 1, but it was incredibly telling of the entire mentality.
@@Jay-pe4xyOP is saying that their old friend transitioned from male to female, was disowned, and her mother became an alcoholic and started dating a guy half her age. There was probably a lot of emotional incest going on, and if I had to guess the mom couldn’t deal with the “loss” of her son and turned to alcohol and started dating young in order to cope, if that makes sense.
Just letting your kids hit each other is disturbing. It will teach them that its okay to physically harm others when they frustrate you. This is how domestic abuse is born.
facts. I have one loophole where one sibling is constantly tormenting the other, than the other at some point lashes out, I feel that shouldn't be praised either but not as harshly reprimanded bc kids are bad at communicating. But I'm definitely still put off by my uncle being like yeah kid 1 (7) has been punched by his sister (12), when we noticed his nose was bloody. like... way to go not teaching your kids that violence is not really an option if there's any other way? I never punched my sister once, no matter how annoyed I was by her.
I’m Latina so the toxic boy mom is VERY prevalent in my culture and family. The boys in my family can do no wrong but us girls have to grow up at a young age in order to be “the perfect wife”. Definitely a generational curse I want to break when I have my own kids.
it’s so crazy how common this behavior is in latin culture. i am constantly arguing with my mom abt the toxic and misogynistic actions she herself and men in the family act upon. they make me feel like i’m the crazy one lol
i’m hoping my sister in law can break it, rn she’s about to have a baby and she’s latina and i guess her mom is getting on her that she’s not having a boy, which makes sense because i had a latino father and some of my uncles who were absolutely toxic and made me afraid to be alone in the same room as them when i identified as a girl, and they all lived together with their mother who cooked and cleaned for them in their 50s
@@isabella_lotti1397for fucking real i honestly feel like my entire family is in an emotionally abusive cult, except we brush all trauma under the rug and pretend it never happened...
as a day care teacher i can confirm these parents are very much real. i’ve seen neglect towards the girl siblings, sexism, a lot of allegations thrown at my coworkers and myself included for “being too cuddly” with their sons. which isn’t true, we show the same amount of love and affection towards all the children. and i have a strong hatred towards those types of mums.
That is so bizarre. If I honestly thought my childcare provider was crossing a physical boundary, they would not be my childcare provider anymore. But being jealous because the care provider is caring? weeeeird
“I’m sorry, did you just give my son a hug” “Well yes ma’am, He wanted one?” “YOU ARE TRYING TO TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME SJSJDLSBDUGKS” “….Yeah I don’t get paid enough for this Sh-“
The mom giving the camera a dirty look as her son learns to cook had the EXACT SAME LOOK as those mean popular girls hanging on their boyfriend’s arm to make other’s jealous. A line had been completed painted over.
They were so close like YES teach your sons to cook!! It’s a life skill that you should teach your sons so they do not expect the future woman in their life to cook everything.
My worst ex's mother was a textbook Boy Mom, her behavior made my skin crawl. Every time he said he wanted to move out (he was 25!), she'd go "Ok, lets find an apartment to get together". Then, when he'd tell her she wasn't invited, she'd have a sobbing meltdown until he backpeddled. She'd act flirtatious towards him in front of me and shoot me little nasty "Eat your heart out, bitch" looks, like a mean high school girl hitting on your crush to mess with you. It was DERANGED.
That’s awful :( I had a similar thing his mom is single for yrs now but she Will secretly make faces behind his back like a mean girl & make a face of my dress, when I compliment her she will say thank you with an attitude.whenever she will get in the argument w him he will tell me that she said that he shouldn’t be so much on the phone call w me because “she doesn’t like it” keep in mind they live together & we only saw eachother two times a week , he wasn’t allowed to have anyone in his room & even him alone his door it’s supposed to be open , he pays her bills & mortage , and one time when I pop off on him for doinf something wrong to me I will call him out and she will get in and literally make me cry , she will make comments ab my mom , she didn’t like it if he mentioned babies or when we both cooked , talk ab marriage . She told him I’m not “wifey material” that I should work hard as her and go to college pay bills cook , yet I worked and never depended on him 😅he hardly me took me out on dates or we hardly had sex in those 3 yrs his mom woulld purposely come beetwen us she didn’t like it when I will do something for his birthday or give him something , she will check his bank account and if he bought something for himself she would say you don’t need that , and he never saw a problem w his behavior & admitted that hes a mommas boy i eventually felt that I was being emotionally abused by them, he’s 28 and she’s 50s now they both live together alone since his sister moved away w her bf so I kind of felt weird about the whole situation
@@Joog0444 girl if you haven’t left, book it cause that’s the type of family to go deranged. don’t let ppl treat you like you’re nothing. you’re worth sm more
@@Jay-rl3bw thank you but we had other problems too but the main one was his mom & im sire she helped him & gave him motivation to leave me but I’m still thankful cuz he hasn’t stop contacting me it’s almost a year and seven times he has tried to act cool w me after him telling ppl I was a crazy cuz of the way I treated his mom when I’m reality his mom and him where emotionally abusive towards me 😂now it’s funny cuz he’s know he’s the problem and his mom if I was the problem like they said I was then he wouldn’t have contact at me at ALL , and I’m sure he does it behind his back
let's be real. making your kids love you isn't even hard and they hand out affection by the bucket if you treat them well. so when these mums pamper their baby boys in this way, it's an easy way to get tons of positive validation. for me, it reeks of an insecure, weak, self-centred woman.
Yeah it's a little sad though when you put it that way. Less infuriating and more pathetic, you know? We all know it's a short-sighted strategy, too. The kids may find it loving and fun when they're five but the emotional incest gets old when you become your own person. The word "suffocation" comes to mind. Like, no well-adjusted adult wants their mom to be like that.
When I worked in a kindergarten, a kid who I never met before really wanted to hug and cuddle (they were really small). In other words you're right about the buckets, little kiddos just give so much of it. My dark, shriveled heart almost woke to life while I worked there.
This explains why so many immature and unprepared people are obsessed with babies and toddlers. I always suspected it was self validation, to feel needed by a dependent helpless tiny human.
I've met guys who were raised like this. The things they all had in common were: 1. None of them had any concept of normal, healthy boundaries. Their moms had invaded their privacy so much and been so borderline incestuous that boundaries were totally foreign. 2. They were incapable of taking care of themselves. Their moms had plowed through every obstacle they'd faced. They had never learned basic life skills like how to do laundry or dishes, how to clean a house, how to budget, how to cook anything. They didn't need to learn because even as adults their moms would take care of all their housework. 3. Every relationship they had ended quickly. sometimes because the mom ran them off, but often because the man was so immature, never helped around the house, expected his partner to do everything for him because that's what his mom did. 4. They were all super codependent with their moms. They couldn't let themselves even think of pulling away because all she'd done for them was held over their heads, and the moms wou;d have breakdowns every time they so much as went on vacation, so they felt responsible for her mental health. 5. They had no idea it wasn't normal. Nothing you could say would convince them that it was inappropriate or weird. Basically it thouroughly fucks them up.
yeah i know a bunch of men who are just like that and its hard to see, i dont entirely blame the boy moms only i believe some blame falls on the adult sons who refuse to grow up
@GriffDidSomeThingsWrong codependency can exist between any people. If you had a parent that needed you to a strange extent and made you need them as well it can have similar effects. Attachment problems can definitely occur between any parent and child, it's simply more common with moms and sons. The great news is that, unlike so many of the guys I've encountered with this issue, who couldn't see that anything was wrong or needed to change, you're in therapy. It's not the same, but I was raised by a mentally unstable mom who through so much manipulation made me feel like I was responsible for her mental health. So I was attached to her in a weird way where she mistreated me, yet I took care of her like she was the child. It was definitely a negative form of attachment. I know how hard it is to say "this can't go on" and tear yourself away and try to work on the damage that was done. Stick with the therapy. I know it can get painful, but you have to push through that pain to get to the other side where you're free.
I’ve heard of it, girl moms. They tell their sons to never hit women, buy women whatever they want, submit to them. The daughters of those moms become brats that expect men to hand over whatever they have, and screech about feminism, when they never display feminism, just toxic misogyny.
You are so awesome and your videos are so dead on! Thank you thank you thank you for saying these things, and saying them so well. The backwards thinking and behavior you call out is so disturbing, and you are helping to combat it.... or at least making me feel better knowing others feel the way I do. Please keep it up.
I knew someone who said "I'm so glad I'm a boy mom because if I had a girl, I'd remind her every day she wasn't loved and that I hated her." That is a direct quote.
The majority of my brain is hoping she never finds a person to have kids with and stays single. But, there's one part of me that, in some sort of fucked up sense, kind of hopes she finds a guy and tries to have kids only to end up having daughters. Like, she tries 5 times and gets 5 adorable baby girls before giving up or being told she medically cannot have anymore kids. I've seen this happen before and it's very funny, like the universe is sending a clear message almost and they refuse to read it lol
That “hot pockets thotty daughter” video is genuinely so upsetting to me. Why is there so much disgust and judgement forced onto someone who’s not only an unknown toddler, but only because of the physical features they were born with??
@SquamataReptile In the video the mom is talking about other peoples daughters, at that point only children. As little toddlers they’re obviously not promiscuous or sexually active, and by physical features I was referring to their being female, because we all know she would never say such a thing about male children. I realize I could have phrased that to be more clear.
I sadly have a toxic boy mom as well. My mom absolutely adores my older brother, and she gets upset when my dad treats me like any father should treat their daughter, and it’s been affecting me for years. I’m very happy it’s being talked about on the internet, and I’m even more happy my mom doesn’t have tiktok.
So she basically wants to be the sole focal point of the men (your brother and dad) in her life. And absolutely hates the idea of sharing this attention with any "rival". Girl o girl, do I feel bad for you and the future partner of your brother.
The fact that 'Happier' is about not being able to move on from an ex and using it as a 40 or 30 year old woman to your own MINOR son is so embarrassing
I was unfortunately engaged to the son of a "Boy Mom" after him and I being together for 7 years. It was one of the most damaging, abusive relationships I've ever had to endure, and I'm still in therapy from the damage it caused. She would force him to 'break up' with me to "put me in my place", she convinced him to cheat on me multiple times (and then would confront and scream at me at my job if I tried to actually end it with him). It was one of the biggest nightmares of my life, and it took me too long to realize that no matter what I did, he would always put her first. Thank god I got out of that horror movie, but the Boy Mom to abuser son pipeline is so much worse than people even realize.
I am so sorry to hear that, glad you're better though, at least you can look forward to a much nicer existence now that all of that is behind you. I have a feeling these people have no comprehension of what their actions cause.
My mom is still a toxic "boy mom". My brother is 51 and still lives with her and has never had a real job. It's gross and weird and the weirdest part is that I have other totally normal brothers who are functional adults, she's just fixated on one of them.
@@beth8775 Weirdly no. Of my four brothers he is 3rd. I'm second youngest, my little brother is youngest. My little brother is disabled (down's syndrome) and lives with my sister. So yeah, my mom thinks it's more important to take care of my weird older brother who isn't disabled at all than my little brother who is. So weird.
This happens more than people think, I too have a younger brother that our mom still babies and he is 50. My 2 other brothers she did not fixate over and they turned out normal.
the "treating their sons as replacements for their husbands" is probably because their young sons are the only men in their lives who they can control and who love them unconditionally
This is also why it becomes a dangerous cycle. An adult man who is overly attached to his mother neglects his wife, and the wife, in turn gets attached to her son, who in turn continues it in the next generation by neglecting his wife etc.
And it's worse that they feel entitled to this love and loyalty even before the boy is born and so they have no choice at all in the matter and it tends to set up how the entirety of their life will go.
This reminds me a bit of the TV show “My Monster-in-Law”. It was meant to be a comedy, but the amount of abuse that woman did to her family was horrifying.
How can someone proudly admit on the internet that they let their favorite son beat their sisters and NOT face any legal repercussions? Isn't this child abuse by proxy? At the very least this is neglection because she's a parent who's purposefully not doing anything to protect her children from harm. This is just sickening.
Yes. It is absolutely abuse by proxy. My mother did the same thing. She never bragged about it on the Internet, but did brag about how she'd always punish the kid who came to her about fights. Since it was always me, begging for help, I was the one who was always punished.
well many of sons of boy mom's become spoiled brat. I saw so many of them failed in relationship and came back to live with their mom(to make them food and do laundry). In korea, I saw some news about sons beat their mother to dead cos mom didn't make him food.(many of them are really old. sons are 40~60, moms are 80) maybe this mom in the video will enjoy that kind of lifestyle
Teaching my daughter to be a strong, independent woman so she doesn't have to deal with a mommy dependant man who cant think for himself and an overly obsessed and weirdly perverted mother in law. 😂
@@mandybrown5611 yurr and that sounds a lot like you think those men wanted that fucked up attention from their mothers when thats never the case :D Imagine how toxic it sounds if I said "i teach my bois to stay away from girls with trauma", kinda sketchy dont you think?
@@tatzecom I think that last part is reasonable if that trauma is obviously unresloved. Like, if the guy is still dependant of his mom (many are) then thats all the reason needed to be cautious. Definitly not a mess anyone wants to get mixed in with.
My abuser, who just so happened to be my step-dad at the time, had a “boy mom” relationship with his mom. It got to the point where my mom and his were arguing over stuff, and the mom screamed “I am his spouse”. These people are not okay and end up easing abusers, p-dos, and unstable individuals. Can’t believe groups of people like this actually exist :(
My mom used to be a boy mom, I noticed I wasn’t the favorite and at the time, my dad lived far away with his (now ex) wife, I got really depressed to the point I never left my room or only ate dinner, when I was able to talk it out with my mom, she didn’t believe me and first, but after a year when my dad moved back and I started living with him, she noticed how lazy my brother is, and how he can’t do much, (me and my brother used to what a room and he was terrible with getting to the bathroom on time he was 7 or 8 I think)
I’ve always been curious of what exactly happens when boy-moms find out that their sons are gay. Like what is the most common reaction? Turning on their "sweet baby boy"? Starting to compete with their partners anyway? Malfunctioning?
my mom is deeply homophobic and favors my brother (i'm a trans man but that obviously doesn't count to her) and i can't speak for all boy moms but im pretty sure my mom would turn on him IMMEDIATELY. like a lot of malfunction but ultimately i think the homophobia would win
I can answer this but as a "girl dad". I'm a lesbian. Have tried to come out to him MULTIPLE times. Doesn0t listen, has turned on me, thinks his "little princess" is ruined
@@normalguy246 Yeah, I guess. And hey, man, everything is going to work out one way or another. I hope that you don’t let her get to you, because she does not deserve any of your nerves or feelings.
I wish to GOD people could talk frankly about emotional incest without being censored or deplatformed, because I feel like there's layers and layers of nuance we just can't completely address without saying the naughty no-no words. Either way, I'm glad people are discovering and talking about it in any way they can. It's tough to deal with
I hate that even mature content creators have to talk in idiotic baby code words. Like having to say “Hey guys Mike Tyson was convicted of gRAPE” takes away from the power of the statement. He’s a monster not just the funny voice boxer but we should be able to say it flat out.
@@fleacythesheepgirlyes. I think it's fine to put a content warning on a video, but creators have to censor themselves so much, it removes some of the seriousness of the accusations and crimes
Ive realized recently in media that only “boy moms” are really coming to light, but I did have a “girl dad” And let’s just say that didn’t end very well so I’m pretty happy to see people calling out these basically,abusive parents
Sadly they generally don't, just pull the "why don't my kids talk to me" bs and demanding their daughters care for them. Sometimes the favored son will still be mooching off them and they expect any daughters/unfavored kids to take up the cost
@@StonedHunter my grandma is exactly like that, she used to hit my mom all the time, cut all her hair as punishment, make her do all the heavy work and house chores since she was 7 (while having preferencial treatment of her older daughter which she never put to work nor hit nor disciplined, and she always brags and jokes about it), make my mom go and come back from kindergarten alone as punishments, and always played the victim, and now that she's 80 and sold her house so my mom was forced to take her to live in our house, my grandma keeps crying to me that my mom never talks to her, that my mom is "mean" and "cold" to her and never does conversation, and it takes all the strenght in my body to not reply "YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF, WHY ARE YOU CRYING NOW". These type of parents NEVER learn.The few times I tried gently, politely and tactfully suggest that this might be cause she used to hit my mom and constantly putting her to work, and my grandma always laughed in my face for suggesting that hitting kids is abuse and calling my generation "soft" for "thinking kids should be allowed to order around their parents" and "be disrespectful". Then she starts cheerfully reminiscing about how she would hit, punish or humiliate my mom as if they were happy fun memories, while my mom smokes her 7th cigarette in a row with a deadpan emotionless face near us. These narcissists get old and still wont understand, they never will, they will NEVER come to terms that they're the problem, they'll just keep crying that "their ungrateful kids are mean to them and dont talk to them".
My mom was a boy mom long before I was ever born. She would never let me.forget it either, constantly reminding me my brother was "so much easier" but according to him I get punished for things he was always allowed to do. And then we really found the favouritism when I asked for a gaming console and my mom told me it was a waste of time and money... While actively supporting my brother's competitive halo tournaments. Luckily he's cool as fuck and found that fucked up and gave me all his old consoles and games and would fight our mom for me about it.
How many of us girl gamers actually got to play as a child by getting access to our brother's consoles because our moms were too sexist to consider it appropriate for women...
I’ve dated a guy who’s mom treated him like that. Worst relationship I’ve ever had in my entire life. He felt entitled to being served by women, didn’t know his literal clothes sizes cause his mom bought him everything and did all his laundry, didn’t know how to do literally anything for himself. That and the mom treated me SUPER weird.
Looks like you got version A of the boy mom where they drive you away because the son leans into being infantilized and sexualized by their mom. My condolences... I hope you didn't date for too long.
@@andrealovesbooks8670not alot of people show their true colours after a few days of relationships. This woman is lucky that she saw the red flags after a few months, not years.
The worst part is the mom at the end has a trans daughter so it’s pretty clear she’s obsessed with her youngest son because he’s the only boy left. It’s horrifying. Their trans daughter immediately got demoted when she wasn’t a boy anymore.
@@noitsholly oof. Seems both parents have messy favoritism issues then. I feel bad for all the kids. Their relationships with each other will be harmed, and that hurts all the kids. Not to mention all the weird feelings that will need to be sorted out in the future when they process how messed up the favoritism dynamics were.
THANK YOU, I was hoping someone would comment this. It’s such a shame her second child has been put out of place for a choice they made. Treat your kids equally.
“Teaching my son to cook so he doesn’t get impressed by you daughters (insert insult) (insert food) how about “teaching my son to cook because it’s a life skill you need to know no matter what gender you are”
As a middle aged man going thru a 2nd divorce, this! I was lucky in that both of my ex wives were skilled and willing cooks in our marriage.. Im only just learning some of.these skills now amd i wish i.had sooner cos just heating shit up and getting takesout is NOT the way to.go. assigning this skil to.a gender is ridiculous
While my mom wasn't a toxic boy mom (just a toxic mom) I still ended up seriously missing out on basic life skills with cooking and sewing. Those were skills I ended up having to teach myself. Definitely not fun giving yourself food poisoning for undercooking chicken the first time...
as the daughter of a boy mom, I have tried my hardest to show my brother that our Mom's actions are toxic and not normal for mothers to do, explaining that her views on the role of a woman in any relationship are misogynistic and not okay for him, or me, to replicate and that if he wants to grow up healthy he can't lean on her for support at every turn because that's what she wants, for him to be entirely dependant on her. I'm proud to say he doesn't let our mother treat him how these moms do to their children anymore, and he is much better for it, but I'm kinda guilty I had to explain those things to my brother at a young age for both of us, just so he can be a functioning human being once he's older.
Don't feel guilty about ensuring he grows up to be a decent human being and not a man-child who cries to his mommy when people don't grovel at his feet. You have done the right thing by preparing him for reality, and making sure he doesn't just stay dependant on his mom. Good job, big sis 👏🏼
Wait this whole time I really thought “boy mom” meant that you’re a mom who only had boys, not that you had both and preferred parenting boys wtf that’s so utterly unhinged
Honestly if I had been in that situation, I would have done the same thing. I'm sorry you were put in that position in the first place, but I think you did right by your brother.
Don’t feel guilty, I’m sorry you had to go through this. But your brother has all the reason to thank you. I wish you well because you are an amazing individual.
As a person that just left a 6 year relationship with someone’s son that was treated like this, I agree that it just stunts their maturity and their ability to take care of themselves
I'm so happy that Funky blurs the kids' faces in anything they use. It's something you rarely see on the internet these days and gives me a little hope for humanity.
As a daughter that dealt with my little brother being treated like this by my own parents. I can definitely say that this does nothing but creates a wedge between siblings. Also creates lazy men. My little brother is in his 20’s and doesn’t lift a finger, doesn’t have a job, a car, a high school education, no interest in relationships or any aspirations in life.
@@dalailarose1596You know what else can cause depression? Being treated like trash compared to your brother by your parents. OP's brother is just lazy because he didn't have to do anything as the boy of the house. Even if he was depressed, he wouldn't get help unless his maid mommy and daddy forced him to. He would refuse because why grow up and fix your own problems when mommy and daddy can take care of you?
@@gratefuldudettesreign4101it’s wild how you can hear one side of a clearly complicated sibling relationship and decide you know enough about the entire situation to be this confident in what you’re saying.
And another thing: no matter how lazy your 20-something brother is, you are the older sibling who chooses to air that laundry and talk shit about him publicly on the internet.
Someone at my mom’s work is a victim of the “Boy Mom,” and he turned out horribly. He can’t do anything by himself and he thinks the world revolves around him.
I was just in the grocery store and a woman said, with her son there, "hes growing so much! soon people will think he is my boyfriend!" and her son says " mom you're being weird
As the partner of a man with a boy mom, I just want to scream in these women's faces that they need to get therapy as soon as possible. It doesn't end well for anyone.
@@elisejohnson6716 It literally continues into adulthood and creates a really unhealthy dynamic of competition between MIL and son's partner, particularly if the son's partner is a woman. In my experience, seeing other people's stories as well as experiencing my own, the end result is that either the mother sabotages her son's relationship with his partner or he ends up having to create stronger, lower contact boundaries with her. There's no way to know which direction he will go in - being able to see his mother's toxicity or thinking it's perfectly fine - but generally that's the deciding factor of which way it ends up going.
@@elisejohnson6716 In addition to the other reply you got, the son could turn out to be a man-child who (consciously or not) expects his partner to mother him and has no sense of self responsibility.
My best friend calls herself a boy mom, but thankfully the reason she does so is as a way to explain why she's so exhausted. None of the creepy stuff, just "my youngest tried doing a stunt he saw Tarzan do off the top bunk and I spent the night in the ER hashtag boy mom"
Yes, this is the normal way to use the phrase "boy mom". Especially if a mom has ALL boys. I've also heard it used as a way to project pride and joy into her parenting journey that she may have been a little disappointed didn't include any girls. "I thought I wanted a daughter but God knew I'd be a great boy mom."
When I was a kid all my aunties only had sons, so every time I would visit they would take me shopping and pamper me and talk about how they wish they had daughters and how sick they are of “boy stuff”😂 that definitely should be the right definition of “boy moms” haha
Yep, I have a friend who has three boys, all of them very outdoorsy, sporty, future handy-men types. She'll comment things like "Boy moms, trading tips on getting that hockey funk smell out of your car" and joke "Does anyone want to have a tea party with me? Please?" All three can do age appropriate cooking and cleaning tasks, because "I'm your mom, not your maid. If you want a maid, get a job and hire one."
I knew a boy mom who would call her teenage son “her little boyfriend” and would get angry when he would go hang out with his friends. As you can imagine, he has major issues now. It’s super sad.
@@dollyvore fortunately he seems to have been able to distance himself from her since he’s become an adult but he definitely still struggles with relationships because his mom tries to sabotage them. I feel so awful for him 😞 It’s so disgusting and creepy and I’m glad people are finally talking about moms like this
I will be so grateful for my son to meet a wonderful woman who makes him happy and makes him feel so very Safe. That his my exact hope for my baby girl.
I always HATED the partially normalized emotional incest between a boy & his mom or a girl & her dad (or even worse - niece/uncle). It makes me sick to hear such atrocious things as “Mommy/Daddy is their first love” ; “oooh he is in love with his mommy”. Thank you Freud for confusing people
exactly! they could word it differently to not make it seem so incest-like, but how is niece/uncle worse😭 either way, any type of this with a family member is criminal
Look, Freud was weird. Weird enough that half of psychology is just people finding fault with his oversimplifications. But there was truth deep in there. The true victim is Oedipus, who literally gouged his own eyes out and threw himself off a clif, yet ended up getting the fame of being a symbol of incest.
exactly. seeing things like this, as selfish as it sounds, makes me so grateful my parents were sensible and straight up did not baby neither me or my brother around when we were little and weren't weird about it,,
I listened to this very disturbing Reddit story of a daughter of a boy mom who’s mother was grooming her own son, and gearing up for yeah.., and planned on isolating him even more (he’s an adult and she purposely stunted him mentally so he’d be too afraid to leave her). And she did it bc her husband wasn’t always around and she wanted date nights. This went as far back as when he was a child and all the kids thought he was the fav. Long story short he escaped to his sis house and their mom threw a fit bc her “boyfriend” aka son left her and she said “I can do whatever I want with him”. Vile
Oh yeah--the siblings were annoyed at the blatant favoritism and after some comments speculating on what was going on, they dug deeper into the dynamic (with the favored son exposing what it was like living with mom and how he felt things were so wrong). Talk about a plot twist when the kids all got on the same page and became a united front to stop it. Just ick and a half. I just hope they're all okay now.
@@tallyp.7643 same I still feel like throwing up thinking about she. She would have escalated to a depraved level if she was able to isolate him. That’s how predators act. Once they get you isolated to where you can’t call for help then they escalate to vile levels. I’m glad he got out and I hope he’s doing ok and keeping away.
As a woman who is married to a man who is an only child. We don't have contact with his mother anymore because of the crap she said and did to me when me and him were dating, these women are unhinged, narcissistic and disgusting. The kid either grows up hating them or he never has a successful relationship.
10:44 This is precisely what covert incest is for anyone who is interested in looking further into the topic. Incestuous behavior does not need to be purely in a physically sexual way. Covert incest is when a parent relies on their child emotionally instead of/replacing the role of their partners. It is them making comments about you during puberty. It is about them talking about how many women they think their infant baby boys will get some day, and making comments about how big they think the genitals of their infant will be when they grow up. It is parents sharing explicit details of their sex life, or involving their children in the discussion and advice of it. It is dads being caught in the living room with porn on the TV. Parents relying on their children in ways they should be with a romantic partner is a MASSIVE part of this abuse. Burdening children and intimately involving themselves in their kid’s lives that are negatively life altering. Please be aware of the signs, and protect the children around you. Boy moms highlight an essential aspect of covert incest. Covert incest is i
*Because my comment got cut off* Covert incest is insidious in nature. Please learn the signs and protect the children around you, and yourself. Any child is susceptible to this grooming behavior. I personally struggle with the consequences of this every day, despite having not seen my perpetrator in at least seven years. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, depression, and other disorders. Please be safe.
Oh look at that. Another layer of my mother's abuse. Fun fact, I dumped her like an old handbag the second I could. Sad fact, she immediately went after my sister for this. "Girl moms" can happen with closeted lesbians, it seems. And yes, she is. And no, she's a pastor, she's not going to get unrepressed, ever. Every layer of gross is real. Ugh.
As as mother to both a girl and a boy, “boy moms” are sooooo creepy. How you can favor one child over the other is so disgusting.
A lot of parents do that, not just because of the gender. But boy mothers are way, more and super creepy like you said, yes.
@ville__ hi?
@@baffledbat ignore them. That's Ville- they just copy comments word for word.
@@baffledbatHI
@ville__ i think you are a little baby :3
Imagine wanting male validation so bad you look for it in an infant...
Fr like I'm really concerned
FUCK foreal
I cannot fathom the mental gymnastics in that
Imagine wanting male validation so bad you create a whole brand new human being just to get it
Psychologists have done studies that csa from mothers is often linked to a need for emotional validation. This IS 100% as creepy as it feels. Even if nothing sinister is going on, the potential is very much there.
The fact that so many parents are okay with this emotional incest is insane. These kids are gonna have some SERIOUS issues when they get older, one way or another
"emotional incest" is such a viscerally disgusting yet uncomfortably accurate description of this trend
@@thomaslayman9487 agreed. Made me sick to even type that and know how accurate it is
Milf lovers
@@thomaslayman9487 It's a very real psychological term, look into the story of paul gilmartin on the mental illness happy hour podcast
@@egghead_felixI never heard of that word but, i wish I never did in the first place- I wanna puke in my mouth rn..
As the father of a 12 year old girl, the way these women talk about their sons makes me sick in my mouth.
that's the only way it should feel. it is sick and nasty that the speak about their kids this way, if I ever heard my cousin's mom or friend's mom talk like this I would probably call the cops for them being a predator
Toxic boy mom: imagines rivalry with son's hypothetical girlfriend
Son: brings a boyfriend home
toxicboymom.exe has stopped working
kindly contact support and send the .exe file to therapy
CHECK MATE! 😎
Uno reverse
YESSSSS
The mom: son what is this?
The son: you told me to stay away from a hypothetical creation so I became gay
I'm genuinely so concerned about the daughters of that woman who justifies her son hitting them. That woman is raising an abuser and victims of domestic abuse at the same time. How can you ruin so many young lives and feel proud about it.
I'm a guy and my sister and I used to hit each other too but my mother would tell us to cut it out and not justify me hitting her lol
@@edithputhy4948Yeah, thats a more normal behavior. Kids will get physical as they try to figure out how to communicate and whats okay and not.
And parenting isnt black n white. Some spank kids who hit, some tell em go in the corner!
But the mom this persons talkin about is just messed up. Who thinks letting their kids beat on their other kids just bc he had a "bad day" is okay? Thats just- so backwards
Im concerned more about how one can fully admit online to domestic violence going on in their home and being complaisant about it and not be arrested for child abuse and neglect
@@ItsTylesOrSomethingbc boys will be boys, didn't you know?
My abusers mother STILL defends him even after video evidence and him pleading guilty
Boy moms took a trend that was originally "teaching my daughter how to do traditionally male skills that girls arent often taught, so that she never feels relient on a man" and turned it into "teaching my son to be Even More Critical of Women"
somehow it always circles back to misogyny i cantt
I also saw a version of it that was “teaching my son traditionally feminine things so you’re son can’t get away with not doing them” which was a fun spin on it
Oh that makes it so much worse
it is so painfully misoginistic and a clear look at how these moms see women and themselves, and they can't even see the irony. the videos about girls are "teaching my daughter skills that will prevent her from entering an abusive relationship with a man in the future" while boy mom's version of it is just "teaching my son to cook/clean so he doesn't need your daughter" they are giving their sons such terrible messages and most of the time they don't even realize the damage
@@Dragon-ld8qf was it with that one south asian mom?
i can just imagine two boys of boy moms who end up being gay and falling in love and they just end up having a cooking competition
😂😂
This absolutely sounds like a lovely plot for a romance novel.
Emotional incest is such a crazy idea and the fact that it’s been partially normalized is fucking wild
It's called Jocasta Compex look it up.
@@DollarDudsIt shouldn’t be called the Jocasta complex, in the same way the Oedipus complex is a bad name. Considering they unalived themselves in despair and disgust after they found out they were mother and son, they don’t fit the concepts. They clearly hated the idea of being incestuous, and didn’t intend to be. And they wouldn’t have been if it weren’t for a messed up prophecy.
So I think people should just keep calling them Boy Moms, and not drag Jocasta into a situation she wouldn’t actually willingly be okay with.
@@cloudstrife4534FINALLY I hate when people bring them into this.
@@DollarDuds giving emotional abuse cool mythological names often obscures what is actually going on tbh
There was a HUGE red flag in this being normalized with Dads and daughters, then it got turned into dad's even being near their daughters being turned into pedos on others insta stories. Fix these crazy moms, people in their lives! Fix em before they're insane
I genuinely don't understand how we don't consider this a form of grooming that young boys are going to need years of therapy to get out of.
It is. It’s called “emotional incest” and it’s extremely damaging and abusive.
It is, and it reminds me of a Tiktok. There's especially a picture of that Tiktok that circulated. It was a high schooler, a guy, in his (American) football "attire" and on the field, with what looked like his girlfriend hugging him (with her arms AND legs). But in reality, that was his mom !
When you watch the Tiktok it's obvious when you see her face. Also, the son looks super uncomfortable the whole time (a loooong time) she's hugging him. When she finally stood back up, he looked so relieved.
Honestly, I'm very concerned for him because that was very creepy. Why are you hugging your son as if you're his girlfriend ??? It's honestly disturbing. I hope he's fine. I also hope he's her only kid because she probably gave him enough bagage to deal with without needing to make someone else suffer.
I 100% agree, I can’t imagine living through this abuse the second you were born into the world, growing up thinking it’s normal.
if the genders were reversed ! People would see this plain as day!! AHHH!!!!
Cuz our retarded society thinks only women get assaulted snd abused like this...
Emotional incest is real and has detrimental effects on children. I’m glad this is being talked about 😞
Not even just emotional incest in some these. To really add to the injury theirs favoritism mixed in. And when the girls of these boy moms realize they'll take it out on their brother rather than blaming the 'mother' and it'll become a worsening loop
@@greenfelix7065it is emotional incest.
Also about the girls blaming the boy,do you really think these boys grow up with any sense of right or wrong?
All of it is bad. The kids are not at fault for how shitty their parents are.
@@Suited_Nat I was agreeing it was emotional incest but adding the girls would resent their brother. I should've added until they're older, mid teens to early adulthood likely. Kids can sense favoritism easily so could resent their brother for a decade or more before realizing their hatred should be to their mother not brother.
@@Suited_Nat They said "not _just_" meaning that emotional incest isn't the only issue that is present. And I agree. Siblings of the favorite child harbor hatred towards the favored sibling 90% of th4 time and take out their pain on them. I've seen it time and time again. These non-favored children completely blame the child that's put on pedestal, up until they're much older and wiser (usually in their 20s-30s) and realize the real perp is the parents and then either go non-contact or minimum contact with their parents.
Also wanted to add, the relationship between those siblings rarely ever get fully amended, unfortunately. The resentment tends to stay even after they become adults and have worked through their childhood trauma.
if someone ever told me they let their daughters get hit by their brothers because "oh i mean maybe their having a hard day-" NO. that could lead to your boy learning that apparently hitting people is okay and not only that but if your boy is having a bad day cant you just comfort him or try to help him in general instead of just letting them do something that could be considered a crime if they did it randomly in public? pure favoritism😨
It would also teach her daughters that if their bf hits them, it's because he's "just having a bad day"
@__wish.bone__3655 fr
Sigmund Freud would be giggling and kicking his feet up in the air like a teenage girl if he saw this
Underrated comment lmao 🤣
Freud has been debunked quite roundly for almost every view he ever had- he was a product of his era- Victorian era, to be exact, one fraught with puritanical views and chasteness above all else. His ‘penis envy’ concept is so completely and utterly absurd, but for some reason people still use it as some proven theory.
Ngl this comment kinda made me do the same (◕ᴗ◕✿)
HE CAN’T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT
Its insane how much he'd enjoy this era as a whole.
Rudy Farias, a boy who was missing for 8yrs but was actually imprisoned by his own mom is the ultimate example of how creepy a boy mom's love can get.
"love"* (abuse and imprisonment isn't love)
The freaky part is that she didn't even physically lock him up, she just brainwashed and smothered him to make him go along with her story.
Noooo that's gross.
@@Topdoggie7 it was such a big new and the mom allegedly SA her own son too thru those yrs. It's heartbreaking.
I'm about to unalive 💀💀💀 what happened to him? Did he ever get out?
That woman who justifies her son's literal abuse towards his sisters is sure proud of herself for raising a possible SAssaulter, huh.
Let's hope the little one will realise his mistakes, apologise and accept the consequences. It would be very nice if the whole family got therapy
@@marigalante944spoiler alert: he won’t. I’ve seen this in my family, they grow up to be totally messed up, and unprepared to be men.
@@marigalante944he won’t if the mom doesn’t say that it is wrong
"Boys will be boys!"- annoying 🙄
They also have a trans daughter that the dad exploits for views
My grandmother was a boy mom. My mom had 3 sisters and a brother, which was favored till my grandmothers death - she literally was keeping all the money she got from her retirement on his account, then live poorly and made my mom shopping grocery for her. One of my mom's sister died of cancer, and one of the last thing she said in her life was "My mother have never loved me".
That is just SAD. I feel so bad for your aunts and mom. I hope y'all are doing alright!
That breaks my heart.. I wish I could give her a hug.
I remember people discussing the link/pipeline of "pick me" women become "boy moms". Definitely can see the similar values.
Oooh, i think i saw the video of that pipeline you're talking about. I think the ytber's name is salem? She said that the "pick me" women end up becoming "boy moms" as a way to feel satisfied from the lack of attention they feel in their marriages.
@@evieweeeegoing to therapy aint enough i need them to be in the psych ward
@@lxmesoda seconding this
I had such a person as a coworker once. Saying stuff like "I wouldn't let my man clean or cook, that's my job as a woman, any man should be glad to have me" (she was a single mum who then liked to date toxic guys) and she's doing the same things to her teenage son. He's going to be a monster and at best will never bring a girl home, I feel already sorry for that hypothetical girl.
@@Tollkirschenkind damn...I hope the boy will realise that his mom's wrong before he makes mistakes. Maybe the mom even needs therapy...
Literally the “maybe he’s having a bad day” shit will make them into abusive husbands
I have younger cousins, one male and one female, and I will say they do sometimes hit each other but my aunt is very firm in stopping that and telling them how its wrong.
@@annieandelsieofarendelle3294
As she should. Kids, even ones that like each other, are little balls of emotion and will come at someone swinging if they're upset. That's why you gotta teach them that you don't hit people for no good reason.
@@crowqueenamps Exactly. It’s still hard since while they do get along, they’re kind of evil geniuses and like to push their boundaries.
Yeah! And, like, for her to be a really good mum she should sit him down, tell him it’s okay that he’s having a bad day and show him that there are healthier ways to release his anger, and that his sisters have nothing to do with that and he should respect them, even if he’s having a bad day. Like this, she’s teaching him how to respect boundaries and a healthier way to deal with his emotions.
Yup. And teaching her daughters that abuse is normal because he’s “just having a bad day”. This woman is 100% being cut out of her children’s lives
God, the mom who lets her son hit her daughters makes me so angry. You're not only teaching your daughters that it's acceptable for the men in their life to take their emotions out on them, but also that the authorities figures that are supposed to help them, will side with him instead of intervening. And then we wonder why people get/stay in abusive relationships.
And also teaches the son that he is allowed to take his anger out on the women in his life and that authority figures will side with him
Does anyone know the lady's account, like does anyone know if these kids are actually safe, or is she still literally profiting off of letting her son abuse her other kids because that sounds like a whole police investigation waiting to happen if it hasn't already, she openly said she lets her son hit her kids and she doesn't care, that's not tolerable at all, they're probably traumatized, and i feel so bad
@keenalovescats it's Anna Saccone-Joly. She and her husband have been around for years being controversial. They used to family daily vlog if that gives you an idea of their vibe...
well said. makes my stomach turn.
I was one of those daughters, and you never really get over it. LPT boy moms: your girls will never, ever forget you making sure they knew you loved their brother more than them. So maybe don't be surprised when they keep their distance as adults.
Every time i see a "boy mom" video or post, I'm reminded of this reddit post where a man ditched his anniversary dinner to help his mom with menial household tasks. He returned home well after the dinner was over to find that his wife had left him with their daughter. Several updates later, the mom had stalked and harassed them to the point of being arrested and OP had uncovered repressed memories of csa by his mother in therapy. It was long, sad, and disturbing, and it really drove home how long-reaching and deep-running the effects of emotional incest really are. These moms may not be touching their boys, but they're warping their perception of what is appropriate and what familial love should be in a way that takes decades of hard, therapeutic work to overcome. It disgusts me to no end.
Imma need a link to read this crazy
@@ruqayyahqadri8180I tried to find it for you but I am unable to. I know for a fact it has been posted on Bestofredditorupdates multiple times. Try the JustNoMil subreddit though, it has multiple stories of boy moms but from the wife's perspective.
I remember that story. Iirc, the incest wasn't just emotional, she had molested her son as a teen. She also sent his wife an envelope of her pubic hair at one point.
So, you start as a "Not Like Other Girls" girl in your teens, you become a "Pick Me" as a young woman, you transition to "Toxic Boy Mom" when you have your first child and then you hit the "Monster M-I-L." Makes sense to me!
Damn you nailed all the life stages haha
Feel like it's the same as different pokemon evolutions
Sooo many women will and have gone through this very toxic cycle
What a, "Monster M-I-L"? If you mind me asking.
@@Liz-zq9hxmonster mother in law
Watching the women look at the camera with that insane glaze over their eyes while the young child is making pizza and thinking he's just having fun with his mommy is unbelievably disturbing and my heart BREAKS for those boys when they get older and realize they were just being used for clicks and views for their insensitive hateful mothers.
Parents needs to fucking stop using their kids as props
It felt just like in a movie where a girl is getting defensive about her boyfriend and trying to threaten another woman (without the boyfriend knowing). Soooo creepy.
Yeahhhh like we make fun of men who have a weird attachment to their moms sometimes, but they're actually victims. This is awful
This made me so so so upset :( poor baby
@kitariki that basically is what would(and does) happen except the "gf" is the mother.. 🤢
As the daughter of a "girl dad," whose mom was a "boy mom," I've experienced that this kinda of behavior leads quickly to abuse and SA. So glad you're calling out these people
Update: Thank you all for your kind words. I wish I was doing better, but unfortunately I am still be stalked and harassed by my "dad." The law doesn't care about victims.
From one internet stranger to another, friendly reminder that you did not deserve any abuse you received, it was not your fault, and healing takes time. Good job on realizing what was happening, I hope you're in a safer place now
@@MoldyRainbowButteri second this. Nobody deserves or is at fault for in family or any other SA
Being a “daddy’s kid” or a “mommy’s kid” is okay. That doesn't mean that the other parent or the other siblings aren't loved.
But these people give the feeling that the child would die without them and that it is normal to behave like that. Sometimes girls are obviously portrayed as something more defenseless with “it’s just a joke” videos...
just sick
Oh gods, I am so sorry that you had to go through all that. Internet stranger hug? If not, that's ok too. ❤
@@MoldyRainbowButterI third this. No one deserves to be abused. It was never your fault and never WILL be your fault. I wish you the best
My fiance had to teach me to cook- and now it's something I love doing for her! Since she's physically disabled and can't stand for very long- I now do most of the cooking for our little family!
Slay I love that for you and your fiance
My favorite response to the “I’m teaching my son to cook so he’s not impressed by your daughter’s frozen lasagna” was a mom who responded “your son should be impressed by my daughter’s microwaved lasagna, she’s 4 and doesn’t even know how to work the microwave yet” 😂
also all thats gonna do is help the guy get a girl with no cooking skills since he can use it to impress them. He will be impressed by something else she brings to the table lol.
@@Zectifin you're talking about her anime art skills, right? Right?
🤣🤣
@ville__ wtf?
Yeah I’m going to teach my son to cook so he can feed himself good food. That’s it.
Filming herself glaring at the camera while she's teaching her son to cook instead of living in the moment and being an actually loving mom to her child. Real nice, Karen. He's going to find this video in a few years and be so disappointed.
Imagine having a pleasant memory of your mom teaching you to cook so you go searching for that memory only to realize your mother only did so to get internet clout and be a misogynist.
@Keyani1probably real. Kids on social media rarely have a good time with it
AFAIK it was a reaction to a trend of "dusty sons". Where they did that cooking as well, but with the caption saying that they teach their daughters but to expect the minimum or less and the sons to be able to take care of themselves
I always forget that part. These videos will be online forever. Kids will grow up one day and see them. Imagine growing up looking to your mother as this amazing role model and a possible blue print for the woman you'd want to marry and then find out she's a lunatic who hates literally every other female on the planet and would rather keep you all to herself.
You're right! If I had a son, I'd teach him to cook so he can fend for himself when I'm not around, and who knows, maybe use it as an outlet like I do?
“When I think of my daughter’s weddings, I get excited! I want to plan their weddings” 💀 i doubt you’re gonna be invited lady
😂😂
the only person thats attending her funeral is her son
Subtly also hints she'll be the kind of mom who ignores her daughter's wants and designs the wedding to be the way she likes it. On the extreme end, may also dress in white on the day and make her daughter's wedding all about her
@@ahstiasummers5583 fr
Definitely the mother that will show up in a wedding dress as her son’s wedding igniting AITA subreddit
7:00 y’all my mom used to sing songs to me. But it was shit like I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack, a song written by a mother to her daughter, these moms singing romance songs to their sons is just EUGH. Freud would have a FEILD DAY wit them!!!
As a mother of three young boys, I *despise* being called a "boy mom" due to people like this. I want my boys to grow up to be respectful, kind, and happy with a partner in the future and I won't view them "breaking up with me". I am their MOTHER, not a partner. It gives major ick when I see these types of moms in real life and online.
Wait...so there are sane boy moms? But you ma'am are not a boy mom, you are a mom of boys who will eventually be decent men :D
So true-!!
@@p.c6175 There are 2 boy moms: the sane and incent
I know 2 sane boy moms that actually teach their sons and daughters equally, 1 of them is fixing their relationship with their eldest daughter so I hope they're doing okay
I have 3 boys too and when someone calls me a "boy mom" responding "don't say that" is just a reflex. I'm not getting clumped with these women who don't like themselves to a point of emotional incest.
@@hippiethot1247I don't even tell people the gender of my child usually because as soon as I say " my son" people get weird. I only have one child right now, but I'd literally poke out my own eyes before id teach him to hate other women. I would be ecstatic if my son found love, and I'd be incredibly embarrassed if my son treated his future partner badly because of me.
"boy moms" and "girl dads" honestly just freak me out. the idea of a parent being so madly protective over their child to the point where they wont even let them have friends of the opposite gender- because their "only love" is their parent- (and in most cases i've seen many boy moms/girl dads automatically assume "oh, my child has a friend of the opposite gender, this is a romantic relationship") is honestly pretty scary to think about, anyone else agree?
edit: forgot to mention something. theres a line between being protective of your kids, and straight up obsession. being protective of your kids can be good if it isn't taken too far, as then it becomes obsession and unhealthy overprotection... glad to see funky do a video on this topic, been waiting for something like this for a while. great job as always!
FACTS
honestly💀imagine the anxiety and the worry it would give the child as soon as they realize about it
i had a friend who had a toxic boy mom. she was a nightmare looking back
Im not a parent and it still freaks me out
Honami reminds me of stewie griffin
as a daughter of a "boy mom", I've never stopped questioning her reasoning for the unwavering favoritism between me and my brother. I never hated myself more.
It's probably because you're hella cool and she has a wound that can't heal. I'm really sorry, you deserved better.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. ❤️
You are so valuable and the fact your mum can’t see that is despicable. Your mother is the same girl who hates to see other beautiful women thrive, and its her loss. You deserve to be loved and appreciated🩷
please don't hate yourself because someone who was supposed to care for you didn't do her job at all. everyone in this world deserves love. everyone. you will find it in someone else.
Just remember its not your fault, and never was. Shes the one in the wrong there and you dont deserve to hate yourself over it
2:32 HER FREAKY VOICE MADE IT SO MUCH MORE FUNNIER AND UNCOMFORTABLE 💀💀💀💀
The only reason a parent should feel "sad" about their child coming home from school with their first significant other is because they're growing up.
Which is likely what they meant.
No, it's not what they meant
@@coreyblanton5826that is not what boy moms mean
@@coreyblanton5826I wish this is what they meant, but unfortunately they blurr the line between familia love and romantic love WAY too much >n>""""
@@coreyblanton5826 Then why did they mention they get excited for their daughters?
The “teaching my son” thing always irked me. The original trend (Girl Parents) started out to not only callout Fathers who refuse to bond with their daughters cause it’s too “girly” but also to teach young girls to carry themselves with confidence and self-assurance. And it turned into….this…
The og concept sounds deserved considering that’s how the relationship with my father went-man wouldn’t even watch movies because it wasn’t live sports-but how did it turn into, whatever this is?
Toxic people tend to be uncomfortable when things are not about them.
Yeah, I tried to teach my son to be self reliant so he’s not a drain on his chosen partner or society. Idk what this shite is 😬
If you're too scared to look or be a little girly while bonding with your daughter are you even a man!? 😂 (In fitting with the societal stereotype)
There’s also an Indian woman who does the trend to raise her son with emotional intelligence and empathy towards other women in his life. These “boy moms” ruined it.
This trend is so bizarre to me, my mom treated me and my brother equally and was excited when he met his now-wife and moved out. Why on earth would you not want your child to become a functional adult with a loving partner? Children are not validation machines that stay five years old forever. The goal is to guide them into becoming their own person separate from you, not cling to them because your own self-image is fragile as glass.
They just want to have perpetual control over their kids, basically. They very much want them to be validation machines that stay 5 years old forever.
Exactly, I also doubt they would like to take care of a 45 years old child. They are all : "never have a girlfriend, stay with mommy".But it is because they imagine their son staying young. I don't think they will have the same speech with a grown ass men sitting in their house at 40+ while they are 70, because : "it is better to stay with mommy". Actually, few weeks ago, in Italy, a woman has put her 2 sons (adults men) in justice to force them out of her house. They didn't want to leave. I won't be surprised if they were raised as mommy's boy.
I know I will have a hard time when my kids grow up and move out, but I also know that's what they're supposed to, my whole job as a parent is to help them prepare for that. I want them to have the things they want for their own futures and lives, and if that includes a partner and children of their own, the last thing I would want to do is make that harder for them to have by acting possessive and competitive for the attention of my adult child.
This is exactly why kids should not have kids.
Me (not a boy) and my brother (a boy) were treated unequally, but that's because our minds work differently. It's not because of our genders. Example: we've both been taught to cook, because it's a good life skill to be able to cook for yourself. But I needed less help learning than he did, so I got less help. I preferred it that way.
The, "ITS A BABY" bit near the start had me rolling. I was drinking milk and i almost spit it out. Especially loved the skill points gag. LOL you go bestie! Also the mom that included the, your daughter, OR YOUR SON, made me SO, SO HAPPY! I love it when parents realize that not all people are the same and that their child is a person that they have to grow and love, and not someone to shape as they see fit.
“you’re slut shaming an imaginary person and getting mad about it. shall i fetch your pills m’lady?” sent me over the edge. this is so real
Admitting you’re okay with your son hitting your daughter on the Internet where thousands of others can see is actually crazy, the sexist favouritism is disgusting…
I agree. Not to mention teaching the boys that it’s okay to be abusive.
She'll probably go crying to the internet when her son one day gets locked up in prison for assault or murder some 20-30 years from now
i bet the boy is going to be *VERY* abusive and violent if this goes unchecked. it is wrong on a WHOLE OTHER LEVEL to teach your son to abuse women. i would get banned if I said everything I had to say here-
He's gonna become abusive if it's not stopped
Alright key differences is sibling fights if SHE starts she gets what she gets and age gaps if she is the older sibling hands fly younger sibling keep it to disarming. Sibling fights are different I throw hands with my sister only when she hits me first and she is several years older than me. KEY DIFFERENCES don't be a shit bird don't start shit you can't finish and don't throw the first punch or kick in the case of my dysfunctional sibling relationship. You only have so many people who will fight with you and for you ,treat them well. My sister is my best friend and worst enemy she taught me to fight you need to know how to fight, teach your sibling how to fight when you are the eldest because they will need to know how but be careful not to hurt them too much.
I knew a woman who told me, and we were in no way close enough for this, that she was so happy she had sons because a daughter would be competition for her husband’s love and she was the only pretty princess he was allowed. She was not joking and that is so deeply weird.
I don’t know why people like this even have kids to begin with
@@perpetualsick - When I found out that I was pregnant with a girl I sat and thought about it to see if I felt worried about the daddy-daughter relationship. It was so uncomfortable even considering it tbh.
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
I felt the same way and it’s worse a way worse feeling when the daughter is not YOURS u be even more scared😭😭and if u alr have anxiety and depression ur fucked.
The first time I heard of this “daughters are competition" thing was fruits basket and I straight up didn’t believe it was real. And it’s way more disturbing to know people actually think like Ren from that show.
calling it “swiping right at the family function” had me cackling, I’m so sorry
Someone once warned me of the “Pick me girl to boy mom pipeline” and I have never forgotten about that nugget of eternal wisdom.
It all leads back to internal misogyny
@@perpetualsick yep! Both of those phenomena’s are created by internalized misogyny. It’s like by being a “boy mom” instead of a “girl mom” you just “aren’t like the other moms and are one of the boys 🤪”
Someone else commented that the full sewage system appears to be "Not Like Other Girls" to "Pick Me" to "Boy Mom" to "Monster MIL"
@@tinyetoile5503 as the prophecy foretold…
tinyetoile5503: I mean if you wanna go technical about not all nlogs will become pick mes but all pick mes are already nlog, pick me is the (worse) evolution of nlog!!😅😂
As a boy mom as her first child. I find this trend so annoying. Seriously a child is a gift no matter the gender.
Thank u sir. Stay woke!!
@@smalleffects1885Sir???
@@smalleffects1885what?
@@smalleffects1885Wtf
@@smalleffects1885SIR??
My mom flat out told me "I don't know why, but I've never been able to love my daughters as much as my sons" and she isn't even a toxic boy mom, just very patriarchal
I don't get my mom sometimes she's not a boy mom at all, might be just a wee bit patriarchal. She says stuff like "no matter how much one tries to say otherwise sons and daughters are different, I'll give them equal love but not equal freedom" I was disappointed, never knew mum thought like this, that daughters should not get equal freedom as the sons.
She can be very hard to understand sometimes, on one hand she wants me to become an independent career oriented woman whom no one can control. On the other hand she thinks women must marry by the age of 23, max 25 otherwise they become "too old"
Seems like she believes in patriarchal values just not the extreme ones, when even the least extreme ones are so hurtful. I believe it's what they are told when growing up, she too might have understood how wrong such parenting is so she tried to fix some things when it was her turn but most of their values never changed due to the decades of brainwashing.
@@strawberryshortcake4345 My mother (and father) exactly. My parents were classic tiger parents who would drill into my head that women had to be educated with a well-paying job. I had to be better and smarter than the boys. But marry a rich man! Also, your brother gets to have as much sex as he wants, and if you dare to have sex once? Then you're a lazy whore who lost all her value and we will kick you out.
Now that I moved to my partner's place, my parents beg me to come back. They can rot.
U can reply..exactly mom I too cant love u as much as I love my dad...my love for dad is something else...I can die for him...but I would probably get u off life support if its costing me money...that would hurt her badly...
@@strawberryshortcake4345 tell her mom u are a woman too....
Or tell her...mom ur sons first priority can never be u...they will have their own family....
I’m a mother of an *almost* toddler boy…. But I’d rather get hit by a truck than be a “boy mom” LOL…. My husband is the love of my life, NOT my son
You could just love both people in a different way, parent-child love is a different love to spouse love
@@Hezkunyes, I do love them in different ways - the video above is making a point of the “boy-moms” who unfortunately don’t make that distinction. My mother-in-law is one who doesn’t make that distinction, which can make life hard for my husband and his brothers and cause many uncomfortable situations
The "teaching my son to cook. So he can cook. For himself. For others. Maybe your daughter. Or your son. And then they can all eat" was so sweet
Fr. This is how parents **should** be. 😭
@@hAkUnAMAtAtA-uf6ul so true 😭
Raising a slave
I had a few girls be impressed with me when they woke up to me cooking breakfast. And I am not talking about Egos in a toaster. Going for round 2 after breakfast.
@@rjgaynor8 good for you, bro
It's like a toxic, twisted Pokemon evolution chain- Not-like-other-girl ➡ Pick-Me ➡ Boy Mum ➡ Monster-In-Law
Mega evolution: Jail
@@CurlyheartI was gonna say the Mega Evolution was being a Karen, but I guess Karens are the regional form.
pokemon season 666 is goin crazy
PLSSSSS WHATT
Leaving out bridezilla smh 😔😔
Both my parents were leaders of a boy scout troop for a time, they encountered many crazy parents. There was a boy who was 17 and didn't know how to tie his own shoes because his mom did it for him, another mom always slept next to him in an all boys tent "in case he got nightmares" even though he was 13 and never had those problems in camp. But I'll never forget this one mom. We were hiking and this one woman was like "OMG did you hear that!? My son is SO SMART! He pointed to a helicopter and called it a helicopter instead of a plane! He is SUCH a genius!" And all my dad said was "I sure hope so [Karen], he is 16 years old."
The twist that he’s 16 tho 😂😭
My jaw dropped reading the last one
@purpleflowers8723 true story. I was there. It took everything in 8 year old me not to laugh.
the last one omfg 😭😭😭😭😭😭
I believed you until the last one. I’ve seen that exact same thing on a twitter post. Even the “I sure hope so, he’s __”
Raising a boy telling him that its okay to hit women when he had a rough day is the most horrible thing I‘ve heard in a long time.
My father's mom was the exact opposite of this and I respect her so much for it, when she found out my dad cheated on my mom and had a kid behind her back, her immediate reaction was "divorce him and take the house, he loves that goddamn house and you're taking that from him and i'll help" she was also best friends with my mom and they called each other almost daily. RIP grandma you were a real one
Dude. I would be so disappointed if my child cheated on their partner. I plan to show all of my future children the movie Steel Magnolias. Maybe that’ll stop them from being sexist. Lol. It definitely changed my view of gender.
A stark contrast to my toxic mother who - when it was revealed to her that my brother had multiple girlfriends and a 7- year affair - told my sister-in-law that "everyone makes mistakes" and she should forgive him. I had to stop talking to her, she's too insane.
Loving someone means holding them accountable sometimes.
RIP Gams, you were a real one
Your gran rocks!!
I love the women who are like "reverse boy moms" where they take an effort to teach their sons to empathize with girls and teach them to cook/clean bc its not just a "womans job".
Boy moms raise entitled lazy men.
I teach my sons life skills, as most moms do. It has nothing to do with gender. Gtfu before you have kids.
@@rousinrabbleMany moms don't.
@NapaCat you seriously need to put your little screen down. Leave your house. Talk to people. I've been a parent for over 23 years, and yes, most moms do teach their sons life skills. Your woes are your problem. Stop blaming others for your poor choices in men.
Shame no one is teaching women to do the same with men.
Had to unfriend a childhood bestie when she started refering to her relationship with her son as boyfriend/girlfriend. Extremely disgusting and concerning.
What the fuck, can you report that to someone? Poor kid, may he be saved from that deranged woman
You should probably contact child protective service.. Honestly, but she might be a predator and they have their own type of child they choose to abuse.
that’s so gross omg 🤢
First off, gross, eww, I'm gonna be sick. Second, did other people around her react that way (like you did by being WTF) and contact child services because I feel like they should.
@@scarofmanleavethembehindi totally agree with you...this Sounds like a big issue and gives me the chill's
Bruh these moms are out of control and these weird videos exploiting their children are so unhealthy on top of it all. These same moms are gonna be the ones who later on cry to everyone about their grown kids never call or visit and they’ll act like they have no idea why. The cosmic ballet goes on
It's ridiculous... also I love ur pfp btw😊
Props to Funky for filtering the toxicity of TikTok into sweet juice that we can taste
Mmm... tasty?
YOU ARE EVERYWHERE
You have a teleportation device, don't you!?
You have been in almost every comment Ive ever seen
*slurps* MMM good soup
An old friend of mine was the "son" of a toxic, borderline pedophilic "boy mom".
She ended up transitioning, and her mom disowned her for it. Last I heard, her mom resorted to alcoholism and was dating a guy half her age.
I know its a sample size of 1, but it was incredibly telling of the entire mentality.
that’s horrible. i truly hope she’s doing okay.
oh wait do you mean the friend or the mom😭 i’m not sure if i’m reading that correctly
@@alyssaes21that's what I'm saying 😭 maybe it's the mom(?)
I think it's the mom, I hope the daughter's okay.
@@Jay-pe4xyOP is saying that their old friend transitioned from male to female, was disowned, and her mother became an alcoholic and started dating a guy half her age. There was probably a lot of emotional incest going on, and if I had to guess the mom couldn’t deal with the “loss” of her son and turned to alcohol and started dating young in order to cope, if that makes sense.
Just letting your kids hit each other is disturbing. It will teach them that its okay to physically harm others when they frustrate you. This is how domestic abuse is born.
No no, she doesn't let her kids hit each other, please give her SOME credit! She... she only lets her SON hit her DAUGHters...
facts. I have one loophole where one sibling is constantly tormenting the other, than the other at some point lashes out, I feel that shouldn't be praised either but not as harshly reprimanded bc kids are bad at communicating.
But I'm definitely still put off by my uncle being like yeah kid 1 (7) has been punched by his sister (12), when we noticed his nose was bloody. like... way to go not teaching your kids that violence is not really an option if there's any other way?
I never punched my sister once, no matter how annoyed I was by her.
@@sonnyajvoll5865YEA, what about it?🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 can't yall see the mother's side too? shes just...a boy mama...
Based
6:18 I need a ‘teaching my son to cook because it’s a basic like skill that everyone should know’.
I’m Latina so the toxic boy mom is VERY prevalent in my culture and family. The boys in my family can do no wrong but us girls have to grow up at a young age in order to be “the perfect wife”. Definitely a generational curse I want to break when I have my own kids.
it’s so crazy how common this behavior is in latin culture. i am constantly arguing with my mom abt the toxic and misogynistic actions she herself and men in the family act upon. they make me feel like i’m the crazy one lol
i hope you do, best wishes! ✊️
East asians call it little emperor syndrome
i’m hoping my sister in law can break it, rn she’s about to have a baby and she’s latina and i guess her mom is getting on her that she’s not having a boy, which makes sense because i had a latino father and some of my uncles who were absolutely toxic and made me afraid to be alone in the same room as them when i identified as a girl, and they all lived together with their mother who cooked and cleaned for them in their 50s
@@isabella_lotti1397for fucking real i honestly feel like my entire family is in an emotionally abusive cult, except we brush all trauma under the rug and pretend it never happened...
as a day care teacher i can confirm these parents are very much real. i’ve seen neglect towards the girl siblings, sexism, a lot of allegations thrown at my coworkers and myself included for “being too cuddly” with their sons. which isn’t true, we show the same amount of love and affection towards all the children. and i have a strong hatred towards those types of mums.
That is so bizarre. If I honestly thought my childcare provider was crossing a physical boundary, they would not be my childcare provider anymore. But being jealous because the care provider is caring? weeeeird
“I’m sorry, did you just give my son a hug”
“Well yes ma’am, He wanted one?”
“YOU ARE TRYING TO TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME SJSJDLSBDUGKS”
“….Yeah I don’t get paid enough for this Sh-“
haha well don't forget hun that matt rife says U ONLY HATE PEOPLE U ARE JEALOUS OF.🤦♀
I wish there was a way people could call cps and have them investigate this kind of stuff because it’s not healthy nor good for the kids
@@CastledarkDweller27so Matt rife hates women then, with how he jokes about beating women who can’t cook.
The mom giving the camera a dirty look as her son learns to cook had the EXACT SAME LOOK as those mean popular girls hanging on their boyfriend’s arm to make other’s jealous. A line had been completed painted over.
Because those are likely the same people but who now have kids.
@@KZ-np8fzditto. it should be illegal for people acting like this to be a parent
@@lourainevillalon3852exactly. it’s so creepy and unsettling
They were so close like YES teach your sons to cook!! It’s a life skill that you should teach your sons so they do not expect the future woman in their life to cook everything.
My worst ex's mother was a textbook Boy Mom, her behavior made my skin crawl. Every time he said he wanted to move out (he was 25!), she'd go "Ok, lets find an apartment to get together". Then, when he'd tell her she wasn't invited, she'd have a sobbing meltdown until he backpeddled. She'd act flirtatious towards him in front of me and shoot me little nasty "Eat your heart out, bitch" looks, like a mean high school girl hitting on your crush to mess with you. It was DERANGED.
That’s awful :( I had a similar thing his mom is single for yrs now but she Will secretly make faces behind his back like a mean girl & make a face of my dress, when I compliment her she will say thank you with an attitude.whenever she will get in the argument w him he will tell me that she said that he shouldn’t be so much on the phone call w me because “she doesn’t like it” keep in mind they live together & we only saw eachother two times a week , he wasn’t allowed to have anyone in his room & even him alone his door it’s supposed to be open , he pays her bills & mortage , and one time when I pop off on him for doinf something wrong to me I will call him out and she will get in and literally make me cry , she will make comments ab my mom , she didn’t like it if he mentioned babies or when we both cooked , talk ab marriage . She told him I’m not “wifey material” that I should work hard as her and go to college pay bills cook , yet I worked and never depended on him 😅he hardly me took me out on dates or we hardly had sex in those 3 yrs his mom woulld purposely come beetwen us she didn’t like it when I will do something for his birthday or give him something , she will check his bank account and if he bought something for himself she would say you don’t need that , and he never saw a problem w his behavior & admitted that hes a mommas boy i eventually felt that I was being emotionally abused by them, he’s 28 and she’s 50s now they both live together alone since his sister moved away w her bf so I kind of felt weird about the whole situation
@@Joog0444 girl if you haven’t left, book it cause that’s the type of family to go deranged. don’t let ppl treat you like you’re nothing. you’re worth sm more
@@Jay-rl3bw thank you but we had other problems too but the main one was his mom & im sire she helped him & gave him motivation to leave me but I’m still thankful cuz he hasn’t stop contacting me it’s almost a year and seven times he has tried to act cool w me after him telling ppl I was a crazy cuz of the way I treated his mom when I’m reality his mom and him where emotionally abusive towards me 😂now it’s funny cuz he’s know he’s the problem and his mom if I was the problem like they said I was then he wouldn’t have contact at me at ALL , and I’m sure he does it behind his back
@@Joog0444 good for you girl!!!
@@Joog0444nah girl how didn't you leave him sooner? Because to me it sounds like he was married to his mom instead
let's be real. making your kids love you isn't even hard and they hand out affection by the bucket if you treat them well. so when these mums pamper their baby boys in this way, it's an easy way to get tons of positive validation. for me, it reeks of an insecure, weak, self-centred woman.
Yeah it's a little sad though when you put it that way. Less infuriating and more pathetic, you know? We all know it's a short-sighted strategy, too. The kids may find it loving and fun when they're five but the emotional incest gets old when you become your own person. The word "suffocation" comes to mind. Like, no well-adjusted adult wants their mom to be like that.
yeah. kids adore even the most abusive of parents at times. i feel grossed out by the implication that they want this much attention from their kids
When I worked in a kindergarten, a kid who I never met before really wanted to hug and cuddle (they were really small). In other words you're right about the buckets, little kiddos just give so much of it. My dark, shriveled heart almost woke to life while I worked there.
This explains why so many immature and unprepared people are obsessed with babies and toddlers. I always suspected it was self validation, to feel needed by a dependent helpless tiny human.
@@DoritoBot9000 my parents told me they had my sister cuz I'm not cute anymore. i think you're pretty close haha
I've met guys who were raised like this. The things they all had in common were:
1. None of them had any concept of normal, healthy boundaries. Their moms had invaded their privacy so much and been so borderline incestuous that boundaries were totally foreign.
2. They were incapable of taking care of themselves. Their moms had plowed through every obstacle they'd faced. They had never learned basic life skills like how to do laundry or dishes, how to clean a house, how to budget, how to cook anything. They didn't need to learn because even as adults their moms would take care of all their housework.
3. Every relationship they had ended quickly. sometimes because the mom ran them off, but often because the man was so immature, never helped around the house, expected his partner to do everything for him because that's what his mom did.
4. They were all super codependent with their moms. They couldn't let themselves even think of pulling away because all she'd done for them was held over their heads, and the moms wou;d have breakdowns every time they so much as went on vacation, so they felt responsible for her mental health.
5. They had no idea it wasn't normal. Nothing you could say would convince them that it was inappropriate or weird.
Basically it thouroughly fucks them up.
yeah i know a bunch of men who are just like that and its hard to see, i dont entirely blame the boy moms only i believe some blame falls on the adult sons who refuse to grow up
@GriffDidSomeThingsWrong codependency can exist between any people. If you had a parent that needed you to a strange extent and made you need them as well it can have similar effects. Attachment problems can definitely occur between any parent and child, it's simply more common with moms and sons. The great news is that, unlike so many of the guys I've encountered with this issue, who couldn't see that anything was wrong or needed to change, you're in therapy. It's not the same, but I was raised by a mentally unstable mom who through so much manipulation made me feel like I was responsible for her mental health. So I was attached to her in a weird way where she mistreated me, yet I took care of her like she was the child. It was definitely a negative form of attachment. I know how hard it is to say "this can't go on" and tear yourself away and try to work on the damage that was done. Stick with the therapy. I know it can get painful, but you have to push through that pain to get to the other side where you're free.
STOP YOU'RE DESCRIBING MY EX-- 😭
@GriffDidSomeThingsWrong Yes, 100% mom-daughter relationships can be emotionally incestuous, absolutely
I’ve heard of it, girl moms. They tell their sons to never hit women, buy women whatever they want, submit to them. The daughters of those moms become brats that expect men to hand over whatever they have, and screech about feminism, when they never display feminism, just toxic misogyny.
You are so awesome and your videos are so dead on! Thank you thank you thank you for saying these things, and saying them so well. The backwards thinking and behavior you call out is so disturbing, and you are helping to combat it.... or at least making me feel better knowing others feel the way I do. Please keep it up.
I knew someone who said "I'm so glad I'm a boy mom because if I had a girl, I'd remind her every day she wasn't loved and that I hated her." That is a direct quote.
That's absolutely disgusting.
Jesus thats messed up
I hope that girl finds out she's infertile one day...
The majority of my brain is hoping she never finds a person to have kids with and stays single. But, there's one part of me that, in some sort of fucked up sense, kind of hopes she finds a guy and tries to have kids only to end up having daughters. Like, she tries 5 times and gets 5 adorable baby girls before giving up or being told she medically cannot have anymore kids. I've seen this happen before and it's very funny, like the universe is sending a clear message almost and they refuse to read it lol
Ah I see you met my mother.
That “hot pockets thotty daughter” video is genuinely so upsetting to me. Why is there so much disgust and judgement forced onto someone who’s not only an unknown toddler, but only because of the physical features they were born with??
This is disgusting, it should be illegal to raise your kids like that, I feel terrible for the kids and anyone that has to deal with the mother.
Sorry, but the mom looks kind of thotty. She is trying to look way younger, but her 'beauty' techniques are failing.
right
I thought being called “thotty” was about promiscuity and being very sexually active and not about physical attributes?
@SquamataReptile
In the video the mom is talking about other peoples daughters, at that point only children. As little toddlers they’re obviously not promiscuous or sexually active, and by physical features I was referring to their being female, because we all know she would never say such a thing about male children. I realize I could have phrased that to be more clear.
I sadly have a toxic boy mom as well. My mom absolutely adores my older brother, and she gets upset when my dad treats me like any father should treat their daughter, and it’s been affecting me for years. I’m very happy it’s being talked about on the internet, and I’m even more happy my mom doesn’t have tiktok.
So your mother gets jealous if your dad treats you like.. his daughter??
@@FuzzyKittenBoots essentially, yeah
@@FuzzyKittenBootsIt's projection. She's probably assuming that the dad is as weirdly emotionally incestuous as she is with her son.
So she basically wants to be the sole focal point of the men (your brother and dad) in her life. And absolutely hates the idea of sharing this attention with any "rival". Girl o girl, do I feel bad for you and the future partner of your brother.
@@itsdramallama_I cry for you man. My mom just hate children. At least she was equal with her hate
The fact that 'Happier' is about not being able to move on from an ex and using it as a 40 or 30 year old woman to your own MINOR son is so embarrassing
I was unfortunately engaged to the son of a "Boy Mom" after him and I being together for 7 years. It was one of the most damaging, abusive relationships I've ever had to endure, and I'm still in therapy from the damage it caused. She would force him to 'break up' with me to "put me in my place", she convinced him to cheat on me multiple times (and then would confront and scream at me at my job if I tried to actually end it with him). It was one of the biggest nightmares of my life, and it took me too long to realize that no matter what I did, he would always put her first. Thank god I got out of that horror movie, but the Boy Mom to abuser son pipeline is so much worse than people even realize.
Where do they live I just wanna talk
@@ChronicHater they live in a constant state of despair, AKA, Nebraska
@@amiritiichia7479That's really unfortunate, I hope you're doing okay or better than when you were with him ❤
I am so sorry to hear that, glad you're better though, at least you can look forward to a much nicer existence now that all of that is behind you. I have a feeling these people have no comprehension of what their actions cause.
you should call the cops and sue them for emotional shit :V it will put them in their place
My mom is still a toxic "boy mom". My brother is 51 and still lives with her and has never had a real job. It's gross and weird and the weirdest part is that I have other totally normal brothers who are functional adults, she's just fixated on one of them.
The obvious disgust aside, I am curious if he is the youngest?
@@beth8775 Weirdly no. Of my four brothers he is 3rd. I'm second youngest, my little brother is youngest. My little brother is disabled (down's syndrome) and lives with my sister. So yeah, my mom thinks it's more important to take care of my weird older brother who isn't disabled at all than my little brother who is. So weird.
This happens more than people think, I too have a younger brother that our mom still babies and he is 50. My 2 other brothers she did not fixate over and they turned out normal.
I would "like", but I can't ruin the 666. Take this as the 700th like.
@@kristymayo494he has had fake jobs
the "treating their sons as replacements for their husbands" is probably because their young sons are the only men in their lives who they can control and who love them unconditionally
It’s this
This is also why it becomes a dangerous cycle. An adult man who is overly attached to his mother neglects his wife, and the wife, in turn gets attached to her son, who in turn continues it in the next generation by neglecting his wife etc.
You are so correct
@@abyrupus OH NO!! You’re so right 😟
And it's worse that they feel entitled to this love and loyalty even before the boy is born and so they have no choice at all in the matter and it tends to set up how the entirety of their life will go.
This reminds me a bit of the TV show “My Monster-in-Law”. It was meant to be a comedy, but the amount of abuse that woman did to her family was horrifying.
How can someone proudly admit on the internet that they let their favorite son beat their sisters and NOT face any legal repercussions? Isn't this child abuse by proxy? At the very least this is neglection because she's a parent who's purposefully not doing anything to protect her children from harm. This is just sickening.
THANK YOU OMG THAT’S WHAT IM SAYING
Yes. It is absolutely abuse by proxy. My mother did the same thing. She never bragged about it on the Internet, but did brag about how she'd always punish the kid who came to her about fights. Since it was always me, begging for help, I was the one who was always punished.
tbh i wish someone reported this kind of vids to police, if she faced legal punishment maybe she would stop
I wonder if they are ok if their husband hit them, because they are teaching that to their daughters
well many of sons of boy mom's become spoiled brat. I saw so many of them failed in relationship and came back to live with their mom(to make them food and do laundry). In korea, I saw some news about sons beat their mother to dead cos mom didn't make him food.(many of them are really old. sons are 40~60, moms are 80) maybe this mom in the video will enjoy that kind of lifestyle
The irony here is, by raising your son this way you're basically ensuring that they'll never get a partner
Not really irony cuz that is often the point. They don't WANT their sons to get partners or move on with their lives.
@ville__did you just copy paste the comment above?
@ville__unfunny
That's what they want. They're controlling and want to keep their 'baby boy' to themselves by keeping them reliant on them. Actually psychopathic
@@oneditzybrunnetteyeah, they’re a bot and a troll
Teaching my daughter to be a strong, independent woman so she doesn't have to deal with a mommy dependant man who cant think for himself and an overly obsessed and weirdly perverted mother in law. 😂
As a girl mom, I agree with this wholeheartedly.
okay sure but please dont teach your children to punish a guy for the developmental failures of their mother.
thats fucked up in its own way.
@@tatzecom Who said anything about punishing? We were insinuating that girls should stay away from momma's boys and toxic boy moms.
@@mandybrown5611 yurr and that sounds a lot like you think those men wanted that fucked up attention from their mothers when thats never the case :D
Imagine how toxic it sounds if I said "i teach my bois to stay away from girls with trauma", kinda sketchy dont you think?
@@tatzecom I think that last part is reasonable if that trauma is obviously unresloved. Like, if the guy is still dependant of his mom (many are) then thats all the reason needed to be cautious. Definitly not a mess anyone wants to get mixed in with.
I belly laughed when you said...don't confuse the boys before they even know there are letters in math.
My abuser, who just so happened to be my step-dad at the time, had a “boy mom” relationship with his mom. It got to the point where my mom and his were arguing over stuff, and the mom screamed “I am his spouse”.
These people are not okay and end up easing abusers, p-dos, and unstable individuals. Can’t believe groups of people like this actually exist :(
I bet there is a strong correlation between a emotionally incestuous mother and pedophillia in men
My mom used to be a boy mom, I noticed I wasn’t the favorite and at the time, my dad lived far away with his (now ex) wife, I got really depressed to the point I never left my room or only ate dinner, when I was able to talk it out with my mom, she didn’t believe me and first, but after a year when my dad moved back and I started living with him, she noticed how lazy my brother is, and how he can’t do much, (me and my brother used to what a room and he was terrible with getting to the bathroom on time he was 7 or 8 I think)
I’m sorry, despite healing being long trust me every small step you take adds up to a bigger step eventually
Your “abuser” is just your schizophrenia
Wow....
I’ve always been curious of what exactly happens when boy-moms find out that their sons are gay. Like what is the most common reaction? Turning on their "sweet baby boy"? Starting to compete with their partners anyway? Malfunctioning?
They turn to either prostitution or incest.
I know too much 😔
my mom is deeply homophobic and favors my brother (i'm a trans man but that obviously doesn't count to her) and i can't speak for all boy moms but im pretty sure my mom would turn on him IMMEDIATELY. like a lot of malfunction but ultimately i think the homophobia would win
I can answer this but as a "girl dad". I'm a lesbian. Have tried to come out to him MULTIPLE times. Doesn0t listen, has turned on me, thinks his "little princess" is ruined
@@normalguy246 Yeah, I guess. And hey, man, everything is going to work out one way or another. I hope that you don’t let her get to you, because she does not deserve any of your nerves or feelings.
There's one tik tok boy mom who's child is trans they now get the same treatment as their sisters
I wish to GOD people could talk frankly about emotional incest without being censored or deplatformed, because I feel like there's layers and layers of nuance we just can't completely address without saying the naughty no-no words. Either way, I'm glad people are discovering and talking about it in any way they can. It's tough to deal with
fr tho
I hate that even mature content creators have to talk in idiotic baby code words.
Like having to say “Hey guys Mike Tyson was convicted of gRAPE” takes away from the power of the statement.
He’s a monster not just the funny voice boxer but we should be able to say it flat out.
@@fleacythesheepgirl Holy- I never heard about that!! Why have I never heard about that! I feel gross now 🤢
@@fleacythesheepgirlyes. I think it's fine to put a content warning on a video, but creators have to censor themselves so much, it removes some of the seriousness of the accusations and crimes
And this one!
ua-cam.com/video/ygtUc3B55Us/v-deo.htmlsi=SpCdYDf4DtdUok2C
Ive realized recently in media that only “boy moms” are really coming to light, but I did have a “girl dad” And let’s just say that didn’t end very well so I’m pretty happy to see people calling out these basically,abusive parents
When these mom’s daughters don’t talk to them when they finally move out, I hope they realize that the hate people give them was actually a warning
Sadly they generally don't, just pull the "why don't my kids talk to me" bs and demanding their daughters care for them. Sometimes the favored son will still be mooching off them and they expect any daughters/unfavored kids to take up the cost
@@StonedHunter my grandma is exactly like that, she used to hit my mom all the time, cut all her hair as punishment, make her do all the heavy work and house chores since she was 7 (while having preferencial treatment of her older daughter which she never put to work nor hit nor disciplined, and she always brags and jokes about it), make my mom go and come back from kindergarten alone as punishments, and always played the victim, and now that she's 80 and sold her house so my mom was forced to take her to live in our house, my grandma keeps crying to me that my mom never talks to her, that my mom is "mean" and "cold" to her and never does conversation, and it takes all the strenght in my body to not reply "YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF, WHY ARE YOU CRYING NOW". These type of parents NEVER learn.The few times I tried gently, politely and tactfully suggest that this might be cause she used to hit my mom and constantly putting her to work, and my grandma always laughed in my face for suggesting that hitting kids is abuse and calling my generation "soft" for "thinking kids should be allowed to order around their parents" and "be disrespectful". Then she starts cheerfully reminiscing about how she would hit, punish or humiliate my mom as if they were happy fun memories, while my mom smokes her 7th cigarette in a row with a deadpan emotionless face near us. These narcissists get old and still wont understand, they never will, they will NEVER come to terms that they're the problem, they'll just keep crying that "their ungrateful kids are mean to them and dont talk to them".
My mom was a boy mom long before I was ever born. She would never let me.forget it either, constantly reminding me my brother was "so much easier" but according to him I get punished for things he was always allowed to do. And then we really found the favouritism when I asked for a gaming console and my mom told me it was a waste of time and money... While actively supporting my brother's competitive halo tournaments. Luckily he's cool as fuck and found that fucked up and gave me all his old consoles and games and would fight our mom for me about it.
Having a brother like that must be so good, my brother just denies any kind of favouritism.
Your bro sounds like a cool dude
Seeing your brother being a cool person really warms my heart cuz most of the time I don't see it being that way 😢
How many of us girl gamers actually got to play as a child by getting access to our brother's consoles because our moms were too sexist to consider it appropriate for women...
Now *that's* a good brother.
I’ve dated a guy who’s mom treated him like that. Worst relationship I’ve ever had in my entire life. He felt entitled to being served by women, didn’t know his literal clothes sizes cause his mom bought him everything and did all his laundry, didn’t know how to do literally anything for himself. That and the mom treated me SUPER weird.
Looks like you got version A of the boy mom where they drive you away because the son leans into being infantilized and sexualized by their mom. My condolences... I hope you didn't date for too long.
@@someusername4129 nah he broke up with me after a few months , thank goodness.
Oof! My ex was like that, and I’m glad he broke up with me lolol
@@pearl_byou should have broken up with him after a week , why stay with him for months until he ended it ???
@@andrealovesbooks8670not alot of people show their true colours after a few days of relationships. This woman is lucky that she saw the red flags after a few months, not years.
The toxic boy mom grows up to be a grandmother that hates her grandaughter, but adores her grandsons
The worst part is the mom at the end has a trans daughter so it’s pretty clear she’s obsessed with her youngest son because he’s the only boy left. It’s horrifying. Their trans daughter immediately got demoted when she wasn’t a boy anymore.
YIKES that’s so sad
Nah, her trans daughter is favoured by the dad.
I feel bad for the other 2 daughters tho.
@@noitsholly oof. Seems both parents have messy favoritism issues then. I feel bad for all the kids. Their relationships with each other will be harmed, and that hurts all the kids. Not to mention all the weird feelings that will need to be sorted out in the future when they process how messed up the favoritism dynamics were.
Oof, does she accepts her at least?
THANK YOU, I was hoping someone would comment this.
It’s such a shame her second child has been put out of place for a choice they made.
Treat your kids equally.
“Teaching my son to cook so he doesn’t get impressed by you daughters (insert insult) (insert food) how about “teaching my son to cook because it’s a life skill you need to know no matter what gender you are”
As a middle aged man going thru a 2nd divorce, this! I was lucky in that both of my ex wives were skilled and willing cooks in our marriage.. Im only just learning some of.these skills now amd i wish i.had sooner cos just heating shit up and getting takesout is NOT the way to.go. assigning this skil to.a gender is ridiculous
While my mom wasn't a toxic boy mom (just a toxic mom) I still ended up seriously missing out on basic life skills with cooking and sewing. Those were skills I ended up having to teach myself. Definitely not fun giving yourself food poisoning for undercooking chicken the first time...
Omg fr, thankfully, my school offers FACS, where we fucking cook and bake shit, and sew stuff :3
You get to sew? I just do cooking 😢
How about cooking so ya don’t starve lol
as the daughter of a boy mom, I have tried my hardest to show my brother that our Mom's actions are toxic and not normal for mothers to do, explaining that her views on the role of a woman in any relationship are misogynistic and not okay for him, or me, to replicate and that if he wants to grow up healthy he can't lean on her for support at every turn because that's what she wants, for him to be entirely dependant on her. I'm proud to say he doesn't let our mother treat him how these moms do to their children anymore, and he is much better for it, but I'm kinda guilty I had to explain those things to my brother at a young age for both of us, just so he can be a functioning human being once he's older.
Don't feel guilty about ensuring he grows up to be a decent human being and not a man-child who cries to his mommy when people don't grovel at his feet. You have done the right thing by preparing him for reality, and making sure he doesn't just stay dependant on his mom.
Good job, big sis 👏🏼
Wait this whole time I really thought “boy mom” meant that you’re a mom who only had boys, not that you had both and preferred parenting boys wtf that’s so utterly unhinged
You did right by him and all the women partners he’ll ever encounter in his life. Thank you. ❤
Honestly if I had been in that situation, I would have done the same thing. I'm sorry you were put in that position in the first place, but I think you did right by your brother.
Don’t feel guilty, I’m sorry you had to go through this. But your brother has all the reason to thank you. I wish you well because you are an amazing individual.
As a person that just left a 6 year relationship with someone’s son that was treated like this, I agree that it just stunts their maturity and their ability to take care of themselves
I'm so happy that Funky blurs the kids' faces in anything they use. It's something you rarely see on the internet these days and gives me a little hope for humanity.
Yes. More creators should do this, I'm hoping Funky starts a trend
Agreed - even if other people are posting their kid’s faces all over the internet for their own clout, doesn’t mean we all need to be complicit in it
Agreed, thanks Funky!
@ville__ lol did you copy & paste my comment? Weirdo behavior
@@Ramberta There a bot, they've done it on other comments as well.
As a daughter that dealt with my little brother being treated like this by my own parents. I can definitely say that this does nothing but creates a wedge between siblings.
Also creates lazy men.
My little brother is in his 20’s and doesn’t lift a finger, doesn’t have a job, a car, a high school education, no interest in relationships or any aspirations in life.
He kinda sounds clinically depressed. But yeah that sucks, I'm really sorry.
@@dalailarose1596You know what else can cause depression? Being treated like trash compared to your brother by your parents.
OP's brother is just lazy because he didn't have to do anything as the boy of the house. Even if he was depressed, he wouldn't get help unless his maid mommy and daddy forced him to.
He would refuse because why grow up and fix your own problems when mommy and daddy can take care of you?
@@gratefuldudettesreign4101it’s wild how you can hear one side of a clearly complicated sibling relationship and decide you know enough about the entire situation to be this confident in what you’re saying.
And another thing: no matter how lazy your 20-something brother is, you are the older sibling who chooses to air that laundry and talk shit about him publicly on the internet.
@@qwerty81808 Why shouldn't she hold her parents and brother accountable?
Imagine defending the enablers of abuse instead of the victim.
Someone at my mom’s work is a victim of the “Boy Mom,” and he turned out horribly. He can’t do anything by himself and he thinks the world revolves around him.
Yeah that’s usually the case,my brothers 28 this year and can’t make his own sandwiches and has never had a job 😅
@@yazmin9483 and sometimes i feel useless for living with my parents at 19 lmfaooo
@@eliweber724I moved out at 20 and I still feel like a bum 😭😭😭😭
I'm surprised she didn't s3xually abuse him
I know someone who's the same way. He's 21 and one of the least functional people I know.
I was just in the grocery store and a woman said, with her son there, "hes growing so much! soon people will think he is my boyfriend!" and her son says " mom you're being weird
That woman is disturbing, poor boy
As the partner of a man with a boy mom, I just want to scream in these women's faces that they need to get therapy as soon as possible. It doesn't end well for anyone.
Same
This.
How does this gross behavior affect the son as an adult??
@@elisejohnson6716 It literally continues into adulthood and creates a really unhealthy dynamic of competition between MIL and son's partner, particularly if the son's partner is a woman. In my experience, seeing other people's stories as well as experiencing my own, the end result is that either the mother sabotages her son's relationship with his partner or he ends up having to create stronger, lower contact boundaries with her. There's no way to know which direction he will go in - being able to see his mother's toxicity or thinking it's perfectly fine - but generally that's the deciding factor of which way it ends up going.
@@elisejohnson6716 In addition to the other reply you got, the son could turn out to be a man-child who (consciously or not) expects his partner to mother him and has no sense of self responsibility.
My best friend calls herself a boy mom, but thankfully the reason she does so is as a way to explain why she's so exhausted. None of the creepy stuff, just "my youngest tried doing a stunt he saw Tarzan do off the top bunk and I spent the night in the ER hashtag boy mom"
i mean honestly, *this* is how boy mom should've been used
Yes, this is the normal way to use the phrase "boy mom". Especially if a mom has ALL boys. I've also heard it used as a way to project pride and joy into her parenting journey that she may have been a little disappointed didn't include any girls. "I thought I wanted a daughter but God knew I'd be a great boy mom."
That's how I use it too. I am a mom with two boys. I'm a boy mom. But not like the kind that songs Olivia Rodrigos "butterflies" to him
When I was a kid all my aunties only had sons, so every time I would visit they would take me shopping and pamper me and talk about how they wish they had daughters and how sick they are of “boy stuff”😂 that definitely should be the right definition of “boy moms” haha
Yep, I have a friend who has three boys, all of them very outdoorsy, sporty, future handy-men types. She'll comment things like "Boy moms, trading tips on getting that hockey funk smell out of your car" and joke "Does anyone want to have a tea party with me? Please?" All three can do age appropriate cooking and cleaning tasks, because "I'm your mom, not your maid. If you want a maid, get a job and hire one."
I knew a boy mom who would call her teenage son “her little boyfriend” and would get angry when he would go hang out with his friends. As you can imagine, he has major issues now. It’s super sad.
That is terrible 😢 Is he helped at all? Sometimes I think parents forget that they don't own their children.
@@dollyvore fortunately he seems to have been able to distance himself from her since he’s become an adult but he definitely still struggles with relationships because his mom tries to sabotage them. I feel so awful for him 😞 It’s so disgusting and creepy and I’m glad people are finally talking about moms like this
@@katoe908emotional incest is too real and too terrifying...
I will be so grateful for my son to meet a wonderful woman who makes him happy and makes him feel so very Safe. That his my exact hope for my baby girl.
I always HATED the partially normalized emotional incest between a boy & his mom or a girl & her dad (or even worse - niece/uncle). It makes me sick to hear such atrocious things as “Mommy/Daddy is their first love” ; “oooh he is in love with his mommy”. Thank you Freud for confusing people
exactly! they could word it differently to not make it seem so incest-like, but how is niece/uncle worse😭 either way, any type of this with a family member is criminal
Look, Freud was weird. Weird enough that half of psychology is just people finding fault with his oversimplifications. But there was truth deep in there. The true victim is Oedipus, who literally gouged his own eyes out and threw himself off a clif, yet ended up getting the fame of being a symbol of incest.
exactly. seeing things like this, as selfish as it sounds, makes me so grateful my parents were sensible and straight up did not baby neither me or my brother around when we were little and weren't weird about it,,
@@6luefirehuh?
@@videoettaceo8900 just sharing my story with how people over sexualize children’s love for their parents
I listened to this very disturbing Reddit story of a daughter of a boy mom who’s mother was grooming her own son, and gearing up for yeah.., and planned on isolating him even more (he’s an adult and she purposely stunted him mentally so he’d be too afraid to leave her). And she did it bc her husband wasn’t always around and she wanted date nights. This went as far back as when he was a child and all the kids thought he was the fav. Long story short he escaped to his sis house and their mom threw a fit bc her “boyfriend” aka son left her and she said “I can do whatever I want with him”. Vile
ew i remember that one. creepy.
Oh yeah--the siblings were annoyed at the blatant favoritism and after some comments speculating on what was going on, they dug deeper into the dynamic (with the favored son exposing what it was like living with mom and how he felt things were so wrong). Talk about a plot twist when the kids all got on the same page and became a united front to stop it. Just ick and a half. I just hope they're all okay now.
@@tallyp.7643 same I still feel like throwing up thinking about she. She would have escalated to a depraved level if she was able to isolate him. That’s how predators act. Once they get you isolated to where you can’t call for help then they escalate to vile levels. I’m glad he got out and I hope he’s doing ok and keeping away.
That is creepy as fuck
If you were disturbed by that I wouldn't read the broken arms story
As a woman who is married to a man who is an only child. We don't have contact with his mother anymore because of the crap she said and did to me when me and him were dating, these women are unhinged, narcissistic and disgusting. The kid either grows up hating them or he never has a successful relationship.
Im kinda scared of marrying men who were only children in their families
Good on you and your husband for making that boundary.
Where do these moms learn this? What's their childhood like? I'm genuinely curious..
@@littlestbroccoliit’s usually generational. They learn from watching their moms/grandmothers or their society conditions them to praise men more.
@@Daveeffwhy
10:44 This is precisely what covert incest is for anyone who is interested in looking further into the topic.
Incestuous behavior does not need to be purely in a physically sexual way. Covert incest is when a parent relies on their child emotionally instead of/replacing the role of their partners. It is them making comments about you during puberty. It is about them talking about how many women they think their infant baby boys will get some day, and making comments about how big they think the genitals of their infant will be when they grow up. It is parents sharing explicit details of their sex life, or involving their children in the discussion and advice of it. It is dads being caught in the living room with porn on the TV. Parents relying on their children in ways they should be with a romantic partner is a MASSIVE part of this abuse. Burdening children and intimately involving themselves in their kid’s lives that are negatively life altering.
Please be aware of the signs, and protect the children around you. Boy moms highlight an essential aspect of covert incest.
Covert incest is i
*Because my comment got cut off*
Covert incest is insidious in nature. Please learn the signs and protect the children around you, and yourself. Any child is susceptible to this grooming behavior. I personally struggle with the consequences of this every day, despite having not seen my perpetrator in at least seven years. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, depression, and other disorders. Please be safe.
Oh look at that. Another layer of my mother's abuse. Fun fact, I dumped her like an old handbag the second I could. Sad fact, she immediately went after my sister for this.
"Girl moms" can happen with closeted lesbians, it seems. And yes, she is. And no, she's a pastor, she's not going to get unrepressed, ever. Every layer of gross is real. Ugh.