Have been into decluttering and minimalism for years now but finally with therapy am getting help for the first time and am currently able to let go of all the physical things that contribute to triggering my PTSD and finally being in control of my life and starting fresh. But yes there is so many ways that we need to let go in life not just the physical things.
Ugh. I just got back from a trip. I had to buy ponchos for it (which were very needed) and now I am ready to donate them because I don't know if I will need them again or not. We do go on short vacation trips at least once a year so a part of me wants to, but a part of me doesn't because it means I have to store it :: groans ::. I just bought a new pair of shoes (but had one that was torn up that I was replacing). I just feel like lately I have too much stuff, even though I know I don't and I continually bring things down and down more and more over all these years of nearly a decade as a minimalist. I so agree with you about how our stuff is not happiness and that it is okay to let go of things that really don't matter in life or are not needed. I am glad you were able to share how you had to let go of something you held on to for so long. It is good to let go. I am glad that I know what I don't need and have self-control to resist things that are not necessary.
I think this totally happens as we go through seasons in our life where maybe we need to accumulate or add a few things depending on what may be going on in our life. When we are so intentional about buying things and when several new things are added, it can seem like a lot when maybe it isn't. I know what you mean. It really is such a balance! ;)
I recently read or heard that as we are trying to be kind to ourselves we musn't be hard on ourselves if we have a negative feeling. As in I shouldn't feel too fat because I want to be kind to myself. But being kind means to let go of these thoughts and not to judge them. And you mentioning that we will keep on practising to want less.. These things kind of connected. We maybe shouldn't try to (only) want less but also if we do want something we can make a consious desicion not to consume it AND not feel bad for wanting more but feeling content that we made a good desicion based on our values.
Just listening to this on repeat right now. Just rings so true in so many ways and is so related to all the things I've been working on and am currently going through. Thank you for the incredible video
PART 1 Hi! I hope today is treating you well :) I'm desperate for advice for retail therapy and this video is so great. A couple months ago I learned about minimalism from you& others & adopted alot of it. Im getting better at finding what works for me and not comparing. My house is about 90% decluttered. But still struggling. Hard to have discipline with not going to stores, to get drinks or eat out often. I've been doing it alot lately even just to browse. Target, thrift store, online, etc. I've gotten better at less impulse buying but I need help on staying home or doing drainless things. Focusing on priorities and like at 13:00, these things aren't making me happy long term I need to change. That food or toys wont cure me. I want to be happier to stay home and not distract myself negative ways.
I think once I realized that excess shopping was just temporary happiness and more of an adrenaline rush that I was feeling, it was easier to remove that negative habit from my life. The constant chase of things and accumulation left me more drained in the long run. Focusing on removing clutter and seeing the beauty in just normal life really fulfilled me so much more long term. I hope this helps. It really is just a rewiring of the brain and changing our whole mindset. I have a couple videos on my channel about shopping addiction. Those might help. :) Figure out your WHY. Why do you want to live a more minimal life? This will help when you feel the pull to consume material things that you don't need....you will remember your reason for wanting a more simple life. These are habits that we built up over our whole life, so sometimes this takes time to shift everything. 🤍
It sounds like you are tempted to shop and go out to eat as a form of entertainment’ or ‘recreation’. I have heard it recommended instead of not trying to go to these places or to stop these outings…rather find and focus on other hobbies or entertainment. If you are ‘busy’ with your new hobby or new recreational activity then you won’t have as much time or attention for going to stores or going out just for ‘fun’. I find it is true, if you ‘just’ look you will always find something to want/ buy. Make a list and only go to stores when you are consciously trying to find that particular item on your list, not just browsing mindlessly. And set time limits. Also there maybe an aspect of ‘loneliness’. Sometimes we want to go shopping or go out to eat to ‘treat’ ourselves because we are feeling lonely. I don’t know at all if this applies to you. Only you know if it does or not. But if it does, then again it is about focusing on finding and making some more effort and time for relationships, either the good ones you already have or finding some new healthy ones. Often if we have good, meaningful connections with even just one or two good people on a fairly consistent basis it is ‘enough’ for us to not feel lonely and therefore try to mask the loneliness with the dopamine hit of ‘shopping’. Just some thoughts I had in response to your comment.
PART 2 Any tips for a ftm that had a traumatic childhood and buys her toddler alot of stuff? I have decluttered alot and switched to more used but I want to be with him not always thinking he needs everything. Ill watch montessori videos like it's a job and keep adding stuff to the list but he has enough. Im running to consumption mostly due to my emotions of him being delayed and in therapies all the time and he doesnt walk yet but I'm holding onto 4 walkers incase 1 is preferred smh or that new toys will help him develop fast. Thank u and sorry for my essay 🩷
I know what you are talking about with the Montessori videos! I used to do the same thing and it is endless the amount of options there are for you to buy! Although I love those style toys. I really think this is just a mindset shift with realizing how much easier and better kiddos play when they are not overwhelmed with so many options. I think just focus on what your kiddo plays with the most, what really engages him, and stick with those simple options. And of course there is nothing wrong with keeping stuff that adds value to you or your kiddos life. It is all about just being intentional and keeping what adds value and removing the excess/clutter. :)
Have been into decluttering and minimalism for years now but finally with therapy am getting help for the first time and am currently able to let go of all the physical things that contribute to triggering my PTSD and finally being in control of my life and starting fresh. But yes there is so many ways that we need to let go in life not just the physical things.
Very well said. If only more people realised all of this. The world would be a much different place
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Ugh. I just got back from a trip. I had to buy ponchos for it (which were very needed) and now I am ready to donate them because I don't know if I will need them again or not. We do go on short vacation trips at least once a year so a part of me wants to, but a part of me doesn't because it means I have to store it :: groans ::. I just bought a new pair of shoes (but had one that was torn up that I was replacing). I just feel like lately I have too much stuff, even though I know I don't and I continually bring things down and down more and more over all these years of nearly a decade as a minimalist. I so agree with you about how our stuff is not happiness and that it is okay to let go of things that really don't matter in life or are not needed. I am glad you were able to share how you had to let go of something you held on to for so long. It is good to let go. I am glad that I know what I don't need and have self-control to resist things that are not necessary.
I think this totally happens as we go through seasons in our life where maybe we need to accumulate or add a few things depending on what may be going on in our life. When we are so intentional about buying things and when several new things are added, it can seem like a lot when maybe it isn't. I know what you mean. It really is such a balance! ;)
Very wise words!
I recently read or heard that as we are trying to be kind to ourselves we musn't be hard on ourselves if we have a negative feeling. As in I shouldn't feel too fat because I want to be kind to myself. But being kind means to let go of these thoughts and not to judge them.
And you mentioning that we will keep on practising to want less..
These things kind of connected. We maybe shouldn't try to (only) want less but also if we do want something we can make a consious desicion not to consume it AND not feel bad for wanting more but feeling content that we made a good desicion based on our values.
Absolutely! 🙂
Thank you so much for making this video. This subject has been on my mind a lot the past week. This was exactly what Ineeded to hear.
🤍
Really great relatable video, thank you. ♥️ Loved your point that we as humans weren’t meant to cling so hard.
Just listening to this on repeat right now. Just rings so true in so many ways and is so related to all the things I've been working on and am currently going through. Thank you for the incredible video
Of course. 🤍I'm so happy you enjoyed it!
PART 1
Hi! I hope today is treating you well :) I'm desperate for advice for retail therapy and this video is so great. A couple months ago I learned about minimalism from you& others & adopted alot of it. Im getting better at finding what works for me and not comparing. My house is about 90% decluttered. But still struggling. Hard to have discipline with not going to stores, to get drinks or eat out often. I've been doing it alot lately even just to browse. Target, thrift store, online, etc. I've gotten better at less impulse buying but I need help on staying home or doing drainless things. Focusing on priorities and like at 13:00, these things aren't making me happy long term I need to change. That food or toys wont cure me. I want to be happier to stay home and not distract myself negative ways.
I think once I realized that excess shopping was just temporary happiness and more of an adrenaline rush that I was feeling, it was easier to remove that negative habit from my life. The constant chase of things and accumulation left me more drained in the long run. Focusing on removing clutter and seeing the beauty in just normal life really fulfilled me so much more long term. I hope this helps. It really is just a rewiring of the brain and changing our whole mindset. I have a couple videos on my channel about shopping addiction. Those might help. :)
Figure out your WHY. Why do you want to live a more minimal life? This will help when you feel the pull to consume material things that you don't need....you will remember your reason for wanting a more simple life.
These are habits that we built up over our whole life, so sometimes this takes time to shift everything. 🤍
It sounds like you are tempted to shop and go out to eat as a form of entertainment’ or ‘recreation’. I have heard it recommended instead of not trying to go to these places or to stop these outings…rather find and focus on other hobbies or entertainment. If you are ‘busy’ with your new hobby or new recreational activity then you won’t have as much time or attention for going to stores or going out just for ‘fun’. I find it is true, if you ‘just’ look you will always find something to want/ buy. Make a list and only go to stores when you are consciously trying to find that particular item on your list, not just browsing mindlessly. And set time limits. Also there maybe an aspect of ‘loneliness’. Sometimes we want to go shopping or go out to eat to ‘treat’ ourselves because we are feeling lonely. I don’t know at all if this applies to you. Only you know if it does or not. But if it does, then again it is about focusing on finding and making some more effort and time for relationships, either the good ones you already have or finding some new healthy ones. Often if we have good, meaningful connections with even just one or two good people on a fairly consistent basis it is ‘enough’ for us to not feel lonely and therefore try to mask the loneliness with the dopamine hit of ‘shopping’. Just some thoughts I had in response to your comment.
PART 2
Any tips for a ftm that had a traumatic childhood and buys her toddler alot of stuff? I have decluttered alot and switched to more used but I want to be with him not always thinking he needs everything. Ill watch montessori videos like it's a job and keep adding stuff to the list but he has enough. Im running to consumption mostly due to my emotions of him being delayed and in therapies all the time and he doesnt walk yet but I'm holding onto 4 walkers incase 1 is preferred smh or that new toys will help him develop fast. Thank u and sorry for my essay 🩷
I know what you are talking about with the Montessori videos! I used to do the same thing and it is endless the amount of options there are for you to buy! Although I love those style toys. I really think this is just a mindset shift with realizing how much easier and better kiddos play when they are not overwhelmed with so many options. I think just focus on what your kiddo plays with the most, what really engages him, and stick with those simple options.
And of course there is nothing wrong with keeping stuff that adds value to you or your kiddos life. It is all about just being intentional and keeping what adds value and removing the excess/clutter. :)
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