Amazing Facts that Sound Fake As Hell
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- Опубліковано 22 тра 2022
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Blazing the new batch, YES! Plants love listening to Danny's scripts read by you
Danny since Simon's no longer walking around you can send him bigger scripts again with pages and pages of introduction
agreed
And 0 chapter headings...
and no page nubers
@@voidcore or any variation in text / sizing. All 20pages of 10pt times new Roman
We want the longer videos Simon
Danny, please write a script in such a way that it forces Simon to pace, scream, and slap the script. we need the old format back
Danny, don't give Simon anymore scripts until he triples your word count. You may have to live off of mice and spiders for a while, but we need to break Simon. Turn him into the psychopath we know and love.
Here! Here! Here! Harumph!!!! Harumph!!! Very Good.
Cheers Blaze Brother!!!!!! (Picture English Parlament banging on the Floor)
Man! Mice and spiders sounds good! I haven't had that in ages. I know what I'm having for dinner tonight. Thanks, my friend.
@@scottbubb2946 No prob! Add some tobasco sauce. It helps. A lot.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
Simon ain't deleting 💩.. 😂
Raid can pay for Jeff Goldblum but can't give Simon $20k for a legendary promo. What madness!
MADNESS.
And I'd MUCH RATHER see Simon than Jeff. I've seen the Jeff commercial. I think it's shite!
I like the longer videos factboi. Danny is just giving us what we want and you're clipping his wings. Let him fly free......figuratively speaking. he must remain in the basement.
Danny’s a peacock! You gotta let him fly!
Danny old boy, I issue you a formal challenge. Write an Epic Blaze that Simon can't resist the urge for an epic roam around and an EPIC script slap. All commenced by a 15 page introduction!
Yes!
I second this! Epic blazes were the best!
Yes this!
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSS!!!!
Longer scripts is the only way Danny has a chance to protest from the basement
*blazement.
Simon, during a 45 minute video you may lose a lot of randoms and casuals somewhere on the ride, but to those of us of the OGBB proclivity we will stand firm and give you all that sweet sweet watch time we have to give.
Fact boy wants money. Diminishing returns from watch time do not interest fact boy. That’s probably a fact.
@@richardwhite3521allegedly
Please fact boi just do one video in the old style. Paper script, walking around while yelling, cocaine and communism jokes, 15 minute intro, all of what made this channel amazing. That video will do better than anything you’ve put on here for a while
^This. The 'new' format without the wandering around and being loud make me question which of Simon's channels I was watching.
Exactly!!
I personaly prefer when Simon has the paper scripts
Yes! I was put off by Simon using the teleprompter.
tree killer ;)
Same
Sooo…Danny is limited in his word count…but Simon is allowed to get sidetracked for 30 minutes each video.
Right.
Got it.
DANNY! Keep that word count down! 😬
Nobody asked for more Simon waffle, but here we are
@@thejudgmentalcat well I did. I seriously wouldn’t mind if these videos were 2.5 hours long.
@@sanderhoogeland9161 I was being facetious, I love his waffling
@@thejudgmentalcat yeah, it’s kind of what we’re here for, isn’t it?
My sentiments exactly fuckin love this dude he brightens my mood after long rough day in the weld shop don't even have to be a "brain" Blaze could be one of any of his millions of channels he runs
I love Danny’s scripts ngl, they’re fantastic - plus, he’s giving you that sweet sweet watch time fact boy 😝
My OGBB shirt feels too much like nostalgia. Please bring back the brilliance that was the channel towards the end of “business blaze”.
"The grand pyramid scheme of things" - Gold, Simon, gold.
Glad somebody else noticed, f*king hilarious 😅
22 minutes of Brain Blaze is nowhere near long enough. I think you're biting of your nose to spite your face by limiting Danny's word count.
I second that
Third
Fourth
Fifth
Sixth
I miss the paper scripts, the pacing, the long intros... This is starting to feel like the other channels. I used to be incredibly excited to see a new episode of BB, but now it doesn't spark excitement anymore. I am hoping it will revert back, because it used to be so much more entertaining.
The views have also gone done. Bring back the BB style!
I think Red Bull should become a sponsor and require Simon to slam a 6-pack of red bulls at the start of every vid
How are those No.1 priority channel growth metrics looking, now that the format and content has been neutered in nearly all aspects that made it special?
"He ate the plaque, because of course he did." I wonder if they considered giving him an entry for "first person to eat a Guinness World Record plaque."
a lot of ppl have already said it in the comments but i gotta say i miss the old format. simon sitting down and looking at the camera almost feels “sanitized” from what BB originally was. bring back long intros, pacing around, and script in hand !!
5:05 - Chapter 1 - Cleopatra lived closer to the moon landing than to building the pyramids
8:00 - Mid roll ads
11:20 - Chapter 2 - A foul mouthed parrot had to be ejected from president jackson funeral
15:00 - Chapter 3 - Bangladesh has a bigger population than Russia
17:35 - Chapter 4 - A man once eaten an entire plane
Now that Simon is using a Teleprompter Danny should recount with 10,000 word scripts. Simon we want revenge and we shall have it.
The 5 seconds of silence at the start was the calmest Simon has ever been.
I didn’t know how much I missed “AMIRIGHT PETAH”
I'm surprised that Simon even allows Danny and Sam to have cards, I thought fun wasn't allowed in the basement
He's only allowed to shuffle them.
@@brainblaze6526 anything more results in being dealt a severe flogging. (Allegedly)
The card shuffling thing isn't completely true, as it assumes each combination has roughly the same odds of showing up. This, however, is not the case - especially, if you only shuffle once (or are bad at shuffling). If you start with a new (i.e. ordered) deck of cards and don't take too much effort to shuffle it, it is indeed possible that someone else did get that ordering before (though still not likely).
*assumes perfect shuffle.
the first shuffle of a new deck is going to look like (omitting suits) AA2233445566etc. not at all random
Danny, just give Simon a 600 page novel to read next time.
I miss the epic Blazes, it used to be a real treat to see a new video from B.B. lately it's more of a "watch when I've watched everything else in my subscriptions feed," type of thing.
This one was particularly weak...
Personally, I miss the 45 minute scripts. Maybe that’s just me…
Also… Simon gives Danny a word count and Danny explains that he cant express it without writing a paragraph and then Simon interrupts complaining that Danny didn’t do it justice and goes on for a paragraph off-script.
Afrikan Grey Parrots are amazing. I believe one of the smartest of them actually showed self-awareness because he asked his keeper what Color he was. Which is insane because it’s a bird.
There’s a swearing African grey with a British owner named Ruby and she’s clearly very smart based on her choice of swear words!
As a developer I am constantly thinking about making websites without Squarespace and I can definitely confirm: I'm insane. We all are.
Did Factboi just get old and tired...that why we have no more walking around ranting and epic blazing?
He switched to Pepsi it seems
Nice
I think Danny should get unlimited word counts on scripts read while you sit.
I don't mind the sitting, but I think that there should be some encouragement to get you back you back up and moving.
Alternate option would be to write a script without any spaces, just one long word.
More words, Danny. More words.
Listen. I like Danny’s writing style. So what if it isn’t brief?
Simon, you killjoy.
I love swearing parrots. There’s an entire UA-cam niche for swearing parrots (per Sam’s use of Eric the Legend) and it’s highly entertaining. They sound like very small insane people and I love it.
Word. Cussing cockatoo... Check it
Jeff Golfblum to his agent: Wow, they really said yes to that number? Guess I'm doing a game ad!
I sense Danny plotting his revenge from the cold, dark basement, slowly, methodically pulling together a script of truly epic proportions, which is 50% intro and anecdotes. Over the course of approximately 2 hours Simon turns into a gibbering wreck as he repeatedly loses his place and re-reads sections of it, stumbles over pronounciations and wonders if he's missing jokes / Danny making fun of him.
Yo Simon. The most popular videos on your channel are of the old format please bring it back! I miss the absolute chaos and script slaps and damnys intros
0:56 I'm happy Sam used Yu-Gi-Oh cards for the example haha
6:05 according to Wikipedia, Bangladesh is about 90% Muslim so it’s not the papacy’s fault this time.
You are right, I think Simon is thinking Philippine this time.
My favourite mad fact, we are closer to the mighty T-Rex, than T-Rex was to Stegosarus. Just shows how long the dinosaurs ruled the earth for.
Blazing while Simon looks me in the eye is fucking weird.
These scripts are getting too short. Raise your game, Danny Factoid
Or maybe find a presenter who recognizes your talent...
I once played poker with a guy at a casino who was convinced the shuffling machine was deliberately giving him bad cards. Only him. And since there were 8 players and a different player got the first card each round, he was convinced the machine could also keep track of where the dealer button was.
Insane.
Yet... he honestly believed it. After half an hour of bad cards (not unusual) he started hassling the dealer, telling her she was cutting the cards in the wrong spot.
Honestly... some people believe the dumbest things.
Because obviously having bad luck at gambling can't possibly be caused by having bad luck....
On the card shuffle thing - that assumes that all permutations are equally likely. There are, however, a set of permutations which are one or two lazy shuffles away from a new deck which are more likely from that starting position and therefore will have been dealt more often in history.
"He ate the plaque, because of course he did" Ledgend!
No walking around, no paper scripts, no fighting the microphone.... channel is losing its charm 😜
I know a lot of people missed the OGBB but the man has started two more channels and revived a third since the reformatting. I imagine his recording time is more packed and that's not counting retakes. Simon may not be as chaotic as he used but if there is any solace he taken the blaze to other channels.
"grand pyramid scheme of things".... I will now absolutely will find a way to lob comedy gold that in to a conversation.
Dude, you are sitting for every episode now but STILL limiting episode length?
Da fuck, Simon?
Ok Simon you are a logical person. Here are some facts. This channel used to be way more successful. I’ll prove it! In the 32 months this channel has been around it’s posted 345 videos. The last 37 of which, have been a bit shit. The most popular of which is only your 224th most popular video on this channel. I’ll admit that that doesn’t account for time to gain views but that doesn’t stop some videos from drastically out performing them! Continuing with this format isn’t just bad for the viewers it’s bad for your business. I’m sure the like ratios have dropped too and I’m happy to do some research on that but this has to stop. Get rid of the desk, bring back the intros and bring back the scripts
Danny, I like the long format videos. Keep sending him bibles please!
After years of watching factboy, it is only now I realize who Peter is.
It’s actually Sweet Pete
I want long intros, Danny going all out & Simon walking around. The energy on this is all off
That reminds me of an old saying. How do you eat an Elephant?
The same way you eat everything else.
One bite at a time.
Come on danny add an 4k words pleaze, i actually prefer the longer videos
"Cleopatra was very much a modern girl in the grand pyramid scheme of things." You won the coolest comment of the internet there, Danny! 😂🤣😂
Speaking of world records, Simon holds the record for the worlds longest tangents.
"Grand pyramid scheme of things." GJ Danny.
Raid Shadow Legends: Simon, we'll pay you to advertise for us.
Simon: Screw that, I'll do it for free!
I have rotten badger and its great. been very happy with all my beard blaze products.
I gave some (R.B.) to a friend for his birthday he loves it as does his wife. Quality stuff IMHO
@@KS-PNW What does it smell like? I'm a girl who loves Musk (perfume, not South African billionaire), but I don't buy scents I'm not gonna like.
Yea? I'm thinking of getting some for my dad, so that's good to know.
"They're Just Birds!"
Tbh that would make a great t-shirt.
The Reverend William Menifee aged 15 at the funeral and 80 years later he wrote this story down.
Clearly he wasn't a 15 year old Reverend and gained the title at some point between the two.
Simon, you're not a dumb man, you could have put this together if you had stopped to think about it.
interestingly, my brother actually taught me a skill obviously has to be two brand new packs or both assigned the same but to get it perfectly matched. took me a decade to realise he had this skill when he always had the best cards jn every single game
Fun fact - if you perfectly cut a deck in two (26 cards on each stack) and perfectly 'shuffle' (one card from left side, one card from right side, one card from left, one card from right and so on), after seven iterations and perfect shuffles, the deck will return to its original state.
Danny: It took me 15 minutes to write. I thought it would take 15 minutes to read.
Fun fact about Cleopatra: She wasn't even Egyptian but Greek. The last ruling member of the House of Ptolomy, one of Alexander the Greats generals.
Also if you want to compare her to Lady Gaga, search for Horrible Histories Cleopatra song.
When I was in university, one of my professors took great exception to the deck shuffling statistic. In a rather Simonesque rant, he drilled it into our heads that though the likelihood of any given order of cards may be 52! from a truly randomized deck, considering that most new decks are originally ordered as (from the face) Spades Ace-King, Diamonds Ace-King, Clubs King-Ace, Hearts King-Ace, there is actually a much higher likelihood of achieving two identical orders of cards from two separate new decks even after 7 shuffles. For example, after a single shuffle of similarly sized half-decks, you could effectively eliminate any permutation that starts with any Spade or Club, low Diamond, or high Heart if you were to deal then. After two shuffles, again of similarly sized half-decks, though the likelihood of those cards may go up, they still have less likelihood of being on 'top'. Even after seven shuffles, though a deck may be random enough for gambling purposes, there is still not equal likelihood of any card being on top.
I don't remember (or have mentally blocked) most of the math he used to support his argument, but I do recall him filling an entire whiteboard with the notes and calculations. There was still an insanely high amount of permutations that would be necessary for two identical deals after 7 shuffles, but it was nowhere near 52!.
“There’s only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.” Oscar Wilde
I shuffled exactly the same combination of cards twice, and a TARDIS appeared. Apparently, the shuffle repeating opened up some portal in the fabric of space time, and the planet was about to implode.
remember when the blaze burned? now it's like more of a slightly damp warm piss in a diaper. an adult diaper.
Genuinely the best edited one of these I've seen 🤣 you had me at Yu-Gi-Oh then broke me with the laughing parrot 🤣 excellent work 🫡
Thank you for clearing up the mystery of what was going to happen to that small piece of your fake plant.
Simon, you're going to get a Guinness World Record for having the most channels on UA-cam of all time.
It's not dannies work count that makes the videos long it's Simons tangents and lets face it we love them 😂
"You love eating non-real stuff." So like unicorns?
16:39 "There's no deserts in the U.K!" - You might want to look up Dungeness in Kent some time. ^_^
Oh Danny got word limits so he’s just makes a nice intro for us finally.
Free Dannys Word Count! :D
Dropsy is just an old-timey way of saying "Edema."
5:44 For what little it may be worth, Simon, you can take heart in the fact that I've never played Raid Shadow Legends and aren't likely to. ^_~
Next up fake facts that sound real as hell
Dropsy was a term used to describe generalized swelling and was synonymous with heart failure. Its treatment options were scanty and were aimed to cause "emptying of the system" or to relieve fluid retention. These remedies were rudimentary, erratic in action, and associated with inconvenient side effects.
If Simon is not going to do a Google search, I guess I will do it myself.
16:22
what i love about simon is he says we are all thinking
That opener 🤣🤣🤣 good job Sam
3:00 oh we just love it when there are far more than 2.5k words, once you add in your own we get a 45 minute Rant
ummmm this is only 22 minutes long though FFS!! I may have to be grumpy for a bit.
What if Danny just shoves a script, page by page, under the basement door ? We will not be denied our Blaze !!! Hurry someone get Simon a paper towel !
Thank you Sam, I'm happy to see that the memes are back.
We need epic Blazes with long intros. Let Danny write about his life! Like the time he was on staggering home from the pub one night, when he became consumed by chem trails getting spewed out from a P 51 Mustang and woke up in a farmers field the next morning. I still think he was kidnapped by aliens ;)
This reminds me of a show called business blaze. I guess this will have to do.
Totally here for the longer videos lol
15:50 As a matter of fact, there is a sizable number of Roman Catholics in Bangladesh… almost a whopping one percent of the population. In contrast, the population is about 89% Sunni Muslim, and 10% Hindu. Neither of the latter two religions prohibit contraception or family planning, within the context of marriage. The study of economics within a given part of the world is far more useful in anticipating future trends, or understand past trends, in population growth.
I miss the non PC , F it all yelling and roaming Simon.
It was 30 to 45 min. Of laughing and enjoy weird shit.
Danny's word count combined with Simons tangents is what make them great!
Something similar happened to Kyle Hill. His old format, (well not exactly his ) Because Science was so vivid, engaging, fresh and FUN. Combining science and laughter.
His new format , under his own name, is way more tame and boring, compared to the old one. Difficult to watch the whole podcast.
His Half-life series is pretty good though, never missed an episode.
Still , it is kinda sad that with some UA-camrs, the change in their format creates much less of an interesting and fun content...
Bummer.
We're we spoiled ? Nah, we just new what worked better. Personal opinion.
Holy Trinity Of Blaze... Has this merch been made? I'd buy It.
BIRDS ARE ADORABLE! ESPECIALLY PARROTS!
And they're more interesting than dogs 😛 *shots fired*
21:11 Sometime around 1995 I met a guy who was refused a Guinness World Record, because his record was "to dangerous" and they were afraid someone would try to break it.
The record he had was "fewest nails used in a bed of nails" (with only 4 nails).
Brain Blaze is secretly Simon's best channel
My BIL is named Peter and he would absolutely agree with 90% of what Simon says
Friend who randomly remembers I'm "good with computers": hey bro can you make me a website? Me: check out squarespace Friend: um, isn't it hard? Me: if you can use Facebook you can figure out squarespace, besides didn't you have that crazy custom my space page? I think you'll figure it out.