Nobody Likes a Soft Serve
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- Опубліковано 1 сер 2024
- We are thrilled to announce that Pumps hasn't been laid in 2,457 days.
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Chapters:
0:00 Intro
0:22 Pumps' cognitive decline
1:10 Bad drivers
3:53 Dude, where's my car?
6:51 Kidnapping fetish
9:46 Kiley reads reviews
11:22 Ad break
15:17 Listener voice memos
22:13 "I'm thrilled to announce..."
25:55 Jenny From the Block (J Welch Remix)
28:54 Hatfishing
33:37 Ad break
37:14 Hateful break-up cards
42:08 Setting your own contact photo
45:17 French kissing
47:08 Outro
Follow Us:
I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast
Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch
Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps
My sister got me a card that says "Dead yet?" Inside "me neither"
I’m gonna need the hook up on where I can get one of those. Genius.
This is my favorite podcast I feel like I'm hanging out with my cool aunts instead of my IRL aunts who just pretend I don't exist for the past 25 years.
You exist here!!❤
Are you a gay? Because same.
From a great aunt you exist and I'm glad you do
@@Emilymk97 ☺️
I feel you. I use to think I was whispering when I spoke the way my mom and her sisters would ignore me even though I was answering the question they had asked and were arguing over….. 😒
Today we learned about Jessica and Pumps origin stories
The countdown music is chill af
Holy shit and I thought I was up early LMAO
‘I’m just afraid I’m going to get thirsty somewhere.’
I used to have so much fun back in the day, taking my Mom places in my Triumph Spitfire convertible. It was my own personal joy on curvy and hilly terrain, to see how many times I'd make her foot go for the imaginary brake on the passenger side! I sure miss her! 😢😢
The mean greeting cards could be called "nasty-grams"
I absolutely loved the ode to JENNY. That song was awesome. ❤❤❤
I learned as a young child to pay attention to where mom parked the car. It only took 1 time when I was about 4 of walking up and down the entire parking lot looking for the car. 😉😆
Where can I purchase "jessy from the block" number 1 on iTunes with pumps on the chorus 😭😭
Nick G, now Pumps needs a rap!
Friggin hell this was such a hilarious episode!!! And Nick G is hella talented
These two are just great. They remind me of my mom when i was a teenager where there was no nonsense allowed in the house with plenty of sass but always motherly lo ve.
Trying riding with a 16 year old boy driving a Jeep Wrangler with the doors off a the roof down. Almost wet myself…..
My mom left my baby brother at the airport. A few years later she left me at a baseball stadium. There was definitely a pattern. 😂
Angie, at the age of 7, 8,9, I can totally understand your desire to see what it’d be like to ride to just the store in the trunk. It WOULD be cool! 😂 I’m so sorry that happened to you that way. Not fair! And that was a great story. I hope you can get over your claustrophobia some day ❤
Good morning ladies ❤ btw - tea dehydrates you.
So does Splenda. Allulose was recommended to me recently. It is supposed to be healthier than sugar but not a neurotoxin like aspartame or sucralose (Splenda).
No it doesn’t
All depends on how your body processes caffeine. Herbal teas would not cause that to occur... But also, if you are noticing you are urinating more after teas/coffee, drink more water. Even if you don't notice, drinking more water is always a good thing!
You too are the brightest part of my day Thank You for the laughs. I've had it with phone updated that put apps on your phone you didn't ask for then have to delete them I've had it😅
Oh my. Not the 2 girls 1 Stanley cup again
OMFG... I know I'm f*cked up for knowing what that means.
The fact that we grazed over the song that was the best thing I've ever heard in my life
Lol! I had the invisible brake pedal when my daughter started driving. She would get so mad at me😡
I've had it.. with people.. family and friends.. that are thrilled to announce.. that they have to go poops..
😂💩😂
I feel you. Unless it is an emergency, no one needs to know.
Thanks a lot!
Now I have to poop 💩
When I'm with my daughters ages 28 and 34 we have to get pics of all food before we eat! Even ice cream!!
I’m claustrophobic just listening to Pumps story.
Me too, and I couldn’t breathe from laughing so hard at it! Thank you ladies, and I really needed that laugh, given these scary political times we are in!
Aerial toppers are a must for finding your car in a busy car park!
Too funny. I can't count the times that I can't remember where I parked!
Thank you so much for all you both do ❤
My mom used the gigantic tupperware shaker bottle from like 1989 for decades as her water bottle ❤
The OG stanley 😂
Speaking of driving…my mom is a side-seat, wheel grabbing passenger. She’s never driven in her life but she sure wants to control it. One time sister had to pull over and stop the car to tell mom she’d have to get out and walk if she ever did that dangerous thing again 😁
LOL I just got my Stanley Tumbler's for Christmas. I didn't realize it was a "cult". I just wanna have cold water and not walk to the fridge 10 times a day during work. Stanley supports my laziness.
I realize we are not currently discussing the unicorn top knot headband but I figured it out. People who are too lazy, or too incapable of actually tying a scarf around their head. It’s a wanna be tied bandana scarf, top knot unicorn, Stanley cup carrying headband! I love y’all. Sue from
Va Beach, Blue dot in red suburban neighborhood wild child aged 61 years young!
Hello Old & Older Broads,
I think you should def make card merch and call them :
“Hard Cards” with the tag line,
“Give it to them Rough”
It not only speaks to the nature of them, but also to Pumps flaccid obsession ❤
Pumps HATES a soft serve
I’ve got 9 colors of top knot headbands that every time I start to reach for one I think…NOPE can’t wear that anymore!! Thanks a lot😉💙🌊
For your card business; “Hate Mail” or “You Got Hate”
For your son: “There is an app for that. “ helps you locate your parked car. You don’t even need to remember to turn it on or mark it on the map. It will do it for you automatically. There are many.
Love the song 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾🎉🎊🎉🎉🎉
I’ve Had It Greeting Cards
Subtitle: Have the day you deserve
A cupholder catastrophe
18:43 somebody needs to do a Venn diagram of Stanley cup users
To answer Pump’s question about how one doesn’t know where your car is parked and why?
Flashback to the late 80’s and I flew to Vegas and rented a car. I drove to a parking garage on the strip went into Caesar’s Palace and had a marathon gambling session and finally started getting sleepy. I got to the parking garage and realized that I had jumped out of my rental so fast I forgot to take note of what I was driving ?!!! All I knew was it was a white compact car ! This was before cell phones so the parking garage guy and I had to roll around that entire multiple floor parking garage and I would jump out and put my key in every small white car ! We did eventually find it but what a horrible end to my “ fun “ vacay lol 😂
🤣🤣🤣
"Nick G gets me" - new tag line
Great work ladies ❤
Hey ladies, I loved the show and I absolutely LOVE the hateful greeting card business! You should definitely give that a try because I would definitely be a customer.
I've often thought that there should be a garanimals for men, but instead of animals, they could use things that men relate to, like beer brands or sports teams. All they have to do is match Bud Lite to Bud light and if they want to look edgy, pair that Bud Lite with regular Budweisser and they'll look GQ ready.
Do you remember when the mall’s had “oxygen” bars? You’d sit at “the bar”, choose your option (had some bs name like energy, motivation, relaxation…) then wear some nonsense and consume said product and people swore how better felt!
Here is my suggestion on “Connections” for auntie pumps: get a small notebook and write down the underlying connection of the four words. Whether it is words contained within words, homophones (not homosexuals), adding or subtracting a letter makes another word, etc. Then when you are stuck pull out your notebook of patterns.
The card business is a great idea! I hope it materializes!
Thanks!
Love these 2 women!
Jennifer: Does your mom drive with 2 feet like mine did? 😆
I drive with two feet. Always have!
@@RealBradMiller
Me too!
Also always have.
Now I know about Stanley cups and top-knot headbands
Connections is hit or miss! Some of the groups just don’t make sense, or are a real stretch. I feel you Pumps!
Well, now you gotta make those cards.
Pumps! You need to research Vinegar Valentines cards. The Victorians used to send hate cards to each other in the mail often with mean poems making fun of them.
I got left at a football game necause both of my parents went in an ambulance.
It was a Saturday morning. My brothers played both varsity football, Friday nights and JV football on Sat mornings. I was in the second grade. My parents were both doctors and my dad was the football team's doctor. I was playing under the bleachers, and at one point popped up, saw the ambulance, realized my mom and my dad were gone, and honestly, I think I went under the bleachers again. I don't remember how I got home, but I'm assuming with my best friends. It was a VERY bad injury, but not my brothers. I'm not completely sure why my mom, and not the player's parents went in the ambulance, and I have no idea how my parent's car got home. Again, I'm assuming my best friend's parents. I'm guessing my mom spoke to other adults I knew and trusted and guaranteed I'd get home.
Parents said, "You watch my kid, I'll take care of yours."
I love the reviews… Ppl crackle me up. Thanks
Pumps..I am curious..plz ask a professional why you would want to be locked in the trunk. Wonder about it and let us know.
I really am curious..why ppl do the things they do..😂😂😂😂 you make my day.
Love from The Netherlands
Vinegar Valentines used to “be a thing”.
Those cards would be great!
" that was your best"🎉
Omg NickG made my day!
When I park my car anywhere..........I take copious notes and even take pictures....I don't have a sense of direction and get turned around easily....
❤ Thank you!!😂😂😂
Where can i hear the pellet story? Is it on a previous podcast episode?? Id love some help finding this story, if anyone knows......😊
Josh “no receipt” Welch says his physical business card he insists you must have.
what a fucking hilarious show today. Had me laughing all the way through. Love you ladies💕🇨🇦
someone said that they noticed that it's always people in the US that are constantly drinking giant containers of water and that you don't usually see that in other countries and it's because we don't have minerals in our water so we're drinking water but not getting the minerals and the benefits from it
LOL love the whole pod but this song has me CACKLING
If I’m wearing a Panama hat inside it’s because I have fine hair and it’s already looking awful from wearing the hat. I have hat hair and I commit.
I admire how they subtly gig each other and move on.
What lipstick is Pumps wearing??
Such a pretty shade
I think its "lovely" with a touch of "stunning" maybe. Pretty close 😊
There are rules for hats on women, just as there are rules for hats on men. Look at any movie made in the era when everyone wore hats, or at Black people going to church right now. The rules are as follows...
Hats on men are worn outdoors only; men must take them off when they get indoors, with a couple of exceptions (it stays on in the elevator on the way to your destination, unless a woman gets on, in which case remove it immediately, with a brief acknowledging nod; also genuine cowboys get to keep them on all the time). Also, tip your hat on the street when appropriate. This move is tricky and has its own set of rules, so study before you try it, and in the meantime, don't look at anyone so you won't accidentally offend anyone.
Women, if they put on a hat (not a winter cap) when they leave the house, must never, ever remove it until they are home again. An acceptable cheat is to take it off in the car driving home so you can try to fluff up your hair again, or because you're too hot. I wear hats a lot, especially on sunny days. I have a gardening hat (wide brim), hats for special occasions. Felt hats are mostly for cold months, straw hats for warm ones, in light colors or natural, decorated with ribbon or flowers/feathers (all decorations must be age-appropriate--no 50 yr old French schoolgirls). And hats for women are day wear only, except the cloche, for some reason. At night, you wear, if so inclined, jewels or feathers in your hair, or tiny, fancy hats with veils, including black ones. Full size black hats with veils are for death-related events, especially if you're the mistress or secret, second wife. If you're one of those, the whole outfit should be smashing, and should include a very expensive triple strand of pearls, if possible. If not, wear your best single strand. Do not speak to anyone.
Hats are, in this day and age, not for the meek. A woman in a hat will be noticed and, one hopes, admired. Cranky Jessica and the older lesbian (Mumps, is it?) should try a pretty hat! It would definitely cheer them up.
Tell me you're a time traveler from the early twentieth century without telling me you're a time traveler from the early twentieth century.
Only one hat 👒 occasion you left out. The Kentucky Derby 🐎
@@RealBradMiller I landed-- I mean, I grew up in New England.
@@ProctorsGamble That would fall under special occasions, which I did mention.
I just watched you on Midas touch. I really enjoyed the episode. Trump is bad he's nuts. I'm glad people are starting to realize that but not enough. Keep up the good work. I'm Democrat all the way.
Vote BLUE 🔵💙💙💙💙🙏🔵🔵🔵
So can you explain how pumps was still
dehydrated? That is definitely confusing??
Soft serve 😂😂
I hope you have stock in ever-ready
I was at a bike race and we stopped at the first water stop. They had mostly Gatorade. Two Westport housewives were bragging about how they didn't even drink water anymore, just Gatorade since they liked it. That is an electrolyte replacement drink designed for athletic events or hard labor in hot weather, it doesn't replace water. I tried to explain this but they weren't having it. Good luck with your heart attack and kidney stones.....
The absolute embarrassment of that Stanley leaking all over the grocery store floor would send me reaching before checking my kid too.
I have a card suggestion! Happy birthday! Hope your not expecting any action tonight just because it's the day you were born! Happy fu@king birthday! 😂😂
Listen up Lovelies… Iisten to Podcasts while on my 10mile hike…
Same!!
The jenny from the block song needs more recognition 🎉😂
You have a new theme song!!!
Ok but some connections categories as of late have been total BS 😂
Kids have bad eye sight due to tech. They drive looking right over the hood instead of distance with anticiption.
Are we about to start and Jen and Pumps rap battle? I'm in
Tammy has what I like to call that very confusing PNW accent because unless you live in a city you have a bit of a southern drawl mixed with a Canadian twist. I know that accent anywhere
Pumps is the original Gimp (locked in a trunk).
I like it when Jennifer spontaneously transition into “Welcome to I’ve had it podcast” 😅😅
If you ever read one of my comments on the podcast I’m going to post, “I’m thrilled to announce I’ve been recognized by Kylie Jen & Pumps. “. I will repost it daily.
New theme song❤❤❤❤
When I was 2.5 years old, I was ACCIDENTLY burned on the head with bacon grease. My mom did NOT leave work! Also, a few years later I had surgery to remove the scar tissue. My dad was in the room with me when I woke up, but HE DID NOT HAVE MY FIND BLANKET! Come on, people! When your kid has surgery, you need to have their favorite toy or object with them BEFORE THEY WAKE UP!
Also, btw, if your toddler is burned on the head with bacon grease, I don't care if you are freaking POTUS, YOU NEED TO LEAVE WORK AND BE WITH YOUR TODDLER!
What is the Stanley Cup?? Is it the Super Gulp things they only have in America?
The card idea is genius, I’ve got a dark sense of humor and cards like that would be hilarious.
i don’t know if i missed it, but have you ladies mentioned the news about biden and have you had an opinion at all. truly just asking if someone could direct me to the episode if they have🫶
love you jen and pumps!
A day or two after the debate was a solemn news flash from them. It was hard to see
@@ProctorsGamble thank you!
@@amandasoul I tried to find it but was unable to. Maybe they took it down.
Those cards were actually horrible someone else should write them lmaooo
Now's NOT the time to talk about Stanley Cup Conttol. Think of the children! Our thoughts and prayers are with all the thirsty people.
Connections and Spelling Bee. 😊
Can yall talk about Ryan Walter’s being connected to Project 2025?
Pumps I hope you use voice activated texts while driving. But no txt is worth risking your life.
I “slam” on the breaks. I can’t stand when people creep up on the stop sign to where it takes them 10 seconds to stop. Like you’re not gonna slam into the windshield just go.
VOTE 💙 2024 to ensure Freedom Choice Joy Prosperity Democracy Diversity and a 🌎 and future for our children 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
Jennifer’s mom has ADHD