Asuelu is the Worst Husband Ever (90 Day Fiancé)

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  • Опубліковано 18 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,1 тис.

  • @dinomahmutovic3649
    @dinomahmutovic3649 Рік тому +4170

    this guy is the embodiment of the phrase "the lights are on but nobody's home"

    • @MissDancingllama
      @MissDancingllama Рік тому +364

      God forgive me but i fully thought he was intellectually disabled when him and kahlani were first introduced

    • @Ass_of_Amalek
      @Ass_of_Amalek Рік тому +62

      🗿

    • @ifyouknowyouknow6964
      @ifyouknowyouknow6964 Рік тому +43

      😂😭💀
      I don’t even know what to say

    • @Maya-ln1os
      @Maya-ln1os Рік тому +19

      OMG!!!! 100% Accurate!!!

    • @Maya-ln1os
      @Maya-ln1os Рік тому +11

      ​@@MissDancingllamaOMG! Me too!

  • @Seeyouin_heck
    @Seeyouin_heck Рік тому +608

    “There’s a chance these kids just think he’s their older brother” …I’m on the floor rn 💀

  • @plordlbloop5250
    @plordlbloop5250 Рік тому +1856

    he said "im not a good person" then proceeded to make ZERO EFFORT to be better 💀

  • @EastSide_LB
    @EastSide_LB Рік тому +42

    That "liddo Island" sound bite randomly is comedy. 😂😂

  • @nileciaable
    @nileciaable Рік тому +323

    I don’t think Asuelu’s brain matured past the age of 10 and I’m so serious.

  • @myselfasevan
    @myselfasevan Рік тому +1133

    I can’t understand how she was a virgin for 30 years and then decides THIS guy is the best option

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +92

      Because she had no options before ASS-uelu.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan Рік тому +152

      @@samsongomah1318 idk I mean she’s kind of heavy but I’d be surprised if she had that much trouble finding someone

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +59

      @@myselfasevan Weight + age + immaturity + two children whose father will never support them = heavy baggage (excuse the pun). Now, some guy might hook up with her, but he would not be a man of value. He would probably be an uneducated, 40-something stock clerk at a big box retailer who knows his value and will never pull down a supermodel. Question is, will Kalani realize that the stock clerk is the man on her level, or will she believe she is entitled to a 10/10, precisely the type of man who will never look her way.

    • @derrickjenkins2455
      @derrickjenkins2455 Рік тому +14

      Because he was her best opinion.

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +31

      @@derrickjenkins2455 Her ONLY option.

  • @purpleg3899
    @purpleg3899 Рік тому +974

    I graduated highschool, doing my final year in university and Michael is still on a video call

    • @Debra17
      @Debra17 Рік тому +75

      It’s the craziest ish for sure! 🤦🏻‍♀️

    • @ST-ik7ry
      @ST-ik7ry Рік тому +32

      😂😂😂😂

    • @Musonda-fb3gn
      @Musonda-fb3gn Рік тому +36

      Youve killed me😂

    • @ericapoe
      @ericapoe Рік тому +8

      Lmao😂😂😂

    • @madtyper1064
      @madtyper1064 Рік тому +55

      At this point, we're all gonna be part of Michael's funeral via FaceTime

  • @desiree1867
    @desiree1867 Рік тому +2099

    You can tell that there was a lot of pain in Kalani’s tears from the years of their marriage. Honestly she should just get a divorce and hit up her free pass

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +4

      Kalani is too immature to think ahead and plan her life properly. She also probably gets off on the attention from being on the show.
      As a morbidly obese and immature woman in her 30s, with two children from a baby daddy who will never pull his weight in terms of support, Kalani's prospects for finding a good man are slim to none. She may meet some guys who will have sex with her, but none of them will wife her up. Too much baggage and no upside.

    • @ckaybee
      @ckaybee Рік тому +46

      She's too busy taking advantage of her hall pass. She is no better than him!

    • @KJ-rk1nh
      @KJ-rk1nh Рік тому +119

      @@ckaybeewouldnt you if you’re married to a toddler

    • @wojtektolsdorf1738
      @wojtektolsdorf1738 Рік тому +92

      @ckaybee of course she is. There's no point for her to waste her life on him. There's no evidence she was ever unfaithful to him, once you cheat on someone and that trust is broken, that person does not owe you anything. She did not need a permission from him. She is over it and good for her.

    • @JustTryingToYoutube
      @JustTryingToYoutube Рік тому +41

      @@ckaybeehe fd up letting her do that only reason she was attached to him was because she was virgin and didn’t know anything else that new guy probabilities blew her mind physically and mentally 😂

  • @marys3738
    @marys3738 Рік тому +66

    “I know I come from little island 🏝️ “ kills me every time 😂

    • @Zeedrew
      @Zeedrew 11 місяців тому +2

      He’s triangulating and gaslighting with that

    • @Lindrios
      @Lindrios 4 місяці тому

      "little island" 💃

  • @madtyper1064
    @madtyper1064 Рік тому +64

    Asuelu's accomplishment until now:
    - Mustache

    • @sexirose
      @sexirose 8 місяців тому

      😂😂

  • @ceecee4049
    @ceecee4049 Рік тому +2591

    Asuelu is literally "🗿" personified.

  • @christinakinch
    @christinakinch Рік тому +1031

    Can't even call Asuelu a man-child, as that'd be an insult to most children who can differentiate right from wrong, and then sincerely apologise for any wrongdoings. Kalani must have the patience of a saint to tolerate this man. He acknowledges that he's the problem, yet shows no genuine remorse or any attempts to improve. Asuelu cries because he's guilty, not because he's sorry.

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому

      Kalani is no prize and probably figures she has no choice because good men aren't lining up to wife-up a morbidly obese, 30-something with two children by a baby daddy who will never support the children in any meaningful way. Plus, kalani is probably addicted to the attention she is getting from the show.

    • @Triforcebro
      @Triforcebro Рік тому +39

      She chose this guy knowing how terrible of a man he is. She chose that worthless type.

    • @lindsaycromartyward3173
      @lindsaycromartyward3173 Рік тому +4

      perfectly worded

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +1

      @@Triforcebro She probably was feeling some pressure from friends to pop the cheery, or she put the pressure on herself. Without any options in the USA, she jumped at the chance to do the deed with a willing ASS-uelu. And, people tend to go a little crazy on vacation.
      The problem is Kalani is very immature and she didn't think about the consequences of having unprotected sex with a stranger. Well, now she knows the consequences...

    • @tshegofatsontombikayise6804
      @tshegofatsontombikayise6804 Рік тому +1

      😂

  • @JudasMaccabeus1
    @JudasMaccabeus1 Рік тому +15

    “Little Island!” 🤣🤣🤣

  • @MishalxIrfan
    @MishalxIrfan 10 місяців тому +8

    The random "little island" audio thrown in the video is hilarious 😹

  • @mercy8406
    @mercy8406 Рік тому +1067

    Asuelu was essentially still nursing from his mother when he and Kalani first appeared on the show. He’s never prioritized Kalani or his children and I’m not surprised that even though he’s nearing 30 he still has no sense of responsibility or maturity. The saddest thing is Kalani’s Samoan father was right when he warned his daughters about dating men from his island, because Asuelu has proven himself to be nothing but a disappointment.

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому

      Kalani and ASS-uelu are both little children in adult bodies.

    • @Triforcebro
      @Triforcebro Рік тому +115

      So she ignored all the advice and now has to live with it.

    • @cmfan6870
      @cmfan6870 Рік тому +14

      He warned her? What episode can I see this on?

    • @gabrielg2856
      @gabrielg2856 Рік тому

      I mean, let's not pretend that she is a decent woman that deserves anything better... She is horrible, toxic and abusive. Fat on top of that, so she should be greatful having even a childish husband that threats her good, beats being a single obese mom...

    • @tucathehuskyboxermix3397
      @tucathehuskyboxermix3397 Рік тому +44

      ​@@cmfan6870The episode where he made bigoted comments.

  • @purpleg3899
    @purpleg3899 Рік тому +1303

    She wants forgiveness? Kalani clearly doesn't know Asuelo is from a humble small village.

    • @joseaviles3198
      @joseaviles3198 Рік тому +59

      When will she ever get to know him. 😢😢

    • @lillard831
      @lillard831 Рік тому +13

      😂😂

    • @sofiamarquez8037
      @sofiamarquez8037 Рік тому +2

      HAHAHAHAAHA

    • @runthishit
      @runthishit Рік тому +25

      @purpleg3899 Kalani didn’t know she was marrying a grown as man child from a humble small village, you mean the one he’s mom is from who doesn’t care about her grandchildren only thing she wants is money, you mean that small village?

    • @justredmist9812
      @justredmist9812 Рік тому +29

      @@runthishitthe original comment is sarcasm

  • @AHamp123
    @AHamp123 Рік тому +109

    The fucking “little island” throughout this had me crying 😂😭

  • @iamyournytemare4253
    @iamyournytemare4253 11 місяців тому +6

    "Little island" will be my excuse for everything now.
    Sir why were you speeding?
    "I come from a little island."

  • @JackOBee29
    @JackOBee29 Рік тому +20

    "there's a chance his kids think he is their older brother" bruh 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @bertooo1358
    @bertooo1358 Рік тому +853

    Crazy that this guy was able to get a woman to sleep with him it’s mind boggling wow

    • @dennisalvarado5134
      @dennisalvarado5134 Рік тому +49

      This should give anyone and everyone hope I'm in the same boat as you just how on earth did they pull that off and they have kids...

    • @icomeinpeace3756
      @icomeinpeace3756 Рік тому +14

      He's not ugly that's why

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому

      Yeah, but what type of woman did he get? A morbidly obese 29-year-old virgin who was so desperate to end the draught that she slept with an island boy because no guy back home would touch her with a 10-foot poll.

    • @muskrat1910
      @muskrat1910 Рік тому +52

      He has the most basic look in Asia 😂

    • @MrMrtvozornik
      @MrMrtvozornik Рік тому

      But, he's not short like Asians. Do you peeps forget just how much that matters to women? @@muskrat1910

  • @lillard831
    @lillard831 Рік тому +592

    i honestly don't know how she survived being with him for this long💀 being with him seems like a full time job at the worst emotionally draining job ever

    • @NobleAbsinthe
      @NobleAbsinthe Рік тому +20

      There are so many people out there that are willing to put up with so much dumb shit, just to keep up with that image of a, "perfect family." They do it for appearances, or to not seem like a failure.
      When in reality, you need to do what's best for you and your children. A simple T chart, pros/cons list, or just a day alone writing down your thoughts, should cause a eureka moment that you need to dump toxic people out of your life. Asuelu is dead weight.

    • @MMDimes
      @MMDimes Рік тому

      I don’t know how he survived being with her.. putting him down, controlling him.

    • @lillard831
      @lillard831 Рік тому +3

      @@MMDimes was she also controlling him when he cheated on her multiple times and when he assaulted her😐

  • @elleofhearts8471
    @elleofhearts8471 Рік тому +355

    wait, so asuelu having thrush (basically a
    yeast infection in your mouth) and not even
    knowing what it is is how kalani discovered
    the cheating??? This relationship is a garbage
    fire. if this is what love is then I dont love
    anyone and I never will. womp womp.

    • @erikag290
      @erikag290 Рік тому +37

      Oh my god that’s what that was??? I didn’t get it! Lol eewww

    • @devibezshow
      @devibezshow Рік тому +18

      Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
      I had no idea what the white tongue thing was about
      Also, eww! 🤢

    • @Long_live_Da_Bully
      @Long_live_Da_Bully Рік тому +8

      Ewww that's why his lip looks swollen?

    • @DM-uz7lf
      @DM-uz7lf Рік тому +7

      Uggggh🤮

    • @jesusespinoza8467
      @jesusespinoza8467 Рік тому +13

      This is not what love is lol

  • @cosmosadorabilis7677
    @cosmosadorabilis7677 Рік тому +127

    The yeast infected tongue thing is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard in my life.
    He definitely didn't get that from kissing anyone.

    • @starquaked
      @starquaked Рік тому

      That’s what I was saying, it doesn’t make sense.. oral sex with a dirty girl maybe

    • @takeshelter5313
      @takeshelter5313 Рік тому +7

      Wtf

    • @capyparis
      @capyparis Рік тому +9

      YEAST INFECTED?? 🗿 oh no how do u even get that

    • @EmyN
      @EmyN Рік тому

      Like a prostitute?

    • @TheNinjaNiky
      @TheNinjaNiky 8 місяців тому +4

      Not really lol, babies get it all the time😂 that's what thrush is. Yeast just likes anywhere that's dark, moist, and warm. I still think what you do though lol, just also trying to put out some unbiased information

  • @robertstackr4799
    @robertstackr4799 Рік тому +58

    Asuelu went from eating raw oranges to an infected snatch

    • @leftifornian2066
      @leftifornian2066 Рік тому +2

      Kinda guy who eats bananas without peeling

    • @latinaonangel
      @latinaonangel Рік тому +3

      😂😂😂 he isnt the bright bulb in the pack thats for sure.
      I died lmao at "Infected snatch"😆

  • @paintitblack9712
    @paintitblack9712 Рік тому +257

    "Asuelu what brings you here":
    " little island" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 sorry that took me out!
    Edit: that closing monolog was icing on the cake

  • @JoyDavidson
    @JoyDavidson Рік тому +119

    I rely on you to keep me up to date with these sickos. So thank you, Quick Slice. Hope you're doing well.

  • @pablo3615
    @pablo3615 Рік тому +1493

    Getting cheated on by a simpleton like Asuelu is honestly next level failure.

    • @BrooklynBaby100
      @BrooklynBaby100 Рік тому +49

      Well to be fair, it’s not like he cheated with a human really, it was more a low level garbage non-person. 😂

    • @billkrill4656
      @billkrill4656 Рік тому +4

      LoL 😂😂😂

    • @leftifornian2066
      @leftifornian2066 Рік тому +2

      @@BrooklynBaby100based asuelu

    • @CharlieApples
      @CharlieApples Рік тому +149

      Getting cheated on isn’t a failure, because you didn’t do anything. The failure is standing right in front of her.

    • @hereweare9096
      @hereweare9096 Рік тому +21

      At least she can divorce him then. Move on.

  • @purpleg3899
    @purpleg3899 Рік тому +458

    He's always on the verge of tears

    • @plordlbloop5250
      @plordlbloop5250 Рік тому +45

      or like. totally baked lmao

    • @foxbuns
      @foxbuns Рік тому +29

      it's because all he does all day is feel sorry for himself💀

    • @countrygirlokla
      @countrygirlokla Рік тому +7

      Yep so that ppl "feel sorry for him" instead of actually holding him accountable for his actions. 🙄

    • @Mia-pr9cd
      @Mia-pr9cd Рік тому

      He is and it's such an unattractive ... quality?

    • @samanthalake5011
      @samanthalake5011 Рік тому +7

      Manipulation

  • @bob2hope127
    @bob2hope127 Рік тому +224

    Her self esteem must have been in the depths of the earth's core when she met him. She's beautiful, kind, and besides making poor life choices with partners , pretty intelligent. He has an obvious intellectual disability , dead in the eyes ,physically ugly , cruel and selfish. How did this match happen ?!

    • @dontyouworryaboutme
      @dontyouworryaboutme Рік тому +23

      She was a 30yr old virgin when she met him so that fits your theory

    • @blobbertmcblob4888
      @blobbertmcblob4888 Рік тому

      @@dontyouworryaboutme She wasn't a virgin lol. No way. Most girls aren't virgins beyond 18. They may tell you they are, but they ain't. I bet at least one "virgin" you know older than 16 has at the very least, had a dick down their throat.

    • @c_es4138
      @c_es4138 Рік тому +29

      It kinda sounds like she just wanted to get certain life events over with, and she absolutely chose the wrong man to do it with. Idk, my guess was that he was the submissive type, and it fit their dynamic for a while (her being the stronger one in the relationship), but he is too apathetic and inept to actually maintain a relationship with someone.

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому +8

      Trying to pzz off her dad.

    • @customsongmaker
      @customsongmaker Рік тому

      He was the only man she'd ever met who could get it up for her huge, whale-like body and fake Kardashian face paint.
      When she met him, she finally found someone dumber than herself, and almost 10 years younger than her, so she could control him and talk down to him every day of his life.
      Her last victim was her little sister, who clearly felt that Kalani had dumped her for Asuelu. Both sisters said that Kolini was the baby's father, which is disgusting and incestuous.

  • @BabyGorl777
    @BabyGorl777 Рік тому +9

    Bro the “little island” inserts have me on the flooooor😂😂

  • @Aja-Christian
    @Aja-Christian Рік тому +354

    You know what REALLY breaks my spirit? Knowing that there are a LOOOOOOT of couples out there like this one. It's a whole lot of women who marry (and have children with) these men going through arrested development, and they basically have to treat their husbands like he's just another kid for her to raise. Other than maybe because they have kids together, I can't think of any other reason why Kalani is still holding out for this guy. By his age the prefrontal lobe is pretty much set, which means if he's like this NOW, the chances of him mentally and emotionally maturing at this stage in his life are pretty slim. It's time to face the music and cut off her son-husband.

    • @almighty7709
      @almighty7709 Рік тому +12

      For every one woman dealing with this, there are 10 men dealing with it they'll survive, it's what they wanted. Any day they can get up and walk away 😊

    • @leftifornian2066
      @leftifornian2066 Рік тому +4

      Have you ever watched Idiocracy ?

    • @tikihutdweller5944
      @tikihutdweller5944 Рік тому +6

      Kalani is a cougar, not a victim. Kalani 28 almost 29 when she met Asuelu(around 21) an innocent island boy when she traveled all the way to Samoa. Once there she met Asuelu where is lured him in and seduced him into sleeping with her. She seduced him many times to get herself pregnant by this Samoan boy because she thought it would win over the approval of her father, who is a Samoan himself. Moreover, she managed to get herself pregnant a second time before she was even married. She did all this while not having any real bedroom fun with him and then married him where she has now been suffering over all of this for 7 years or so she says. She did this all so that she could have the 2 Samoan kids that she thought her father and she would want. Asuelu is the victim here, he just doesn't realize it. This woman has really twisted things around, all in her own mind. Kalani did this all for/to herself, case closed.

    • @SA-ey6nt
      @SA-ey6nt Рік тому +45

      @@almighty7709 Bullcrap, the term man-child exists for a reason. "For every woman there's 10 men dealing with it" 😅 sometimes it's best to be quiet

    • @blobbertmcblob4888
      @blobbertmcblob4888 Рік тому +4

      @@SA-ey6nt The term "man-child" was made up by...*gasp* women, for women who seem to think that as soon as you get into a relationship, you need to "grow up" and become boring as hell.
      The term "Man-child" was made up by women who got with men, then expected those men to just drop their own happiness and provide for the women and when they didn't or doesn't happen, well you get "man-children"
      The more you know.

  • @JPOGers
    @JPOGers Рік тому +157

    The funniest thing about this couple will forever be the fact that Kalani wanted to pursue a Samoan man specifically with a Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson kind of dude in mind; and instead wownd up with “why you no cuddle me?”, which is about as far on the opposite end of the spectrum from Dwayne Johnson as you can get 😆

    • @Shay416
      @Shay416 Рік тому +12

      😢 wow forgot they are from the same place...

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому +20

      She didn't get past the tour guide.

    • @rosamaundallen1035
      @rosamaundallen1035 Рік тому +4

      @@LilLadyAy😂😂

    • @gregnunes459
      @gregnunes459 5 місяців тому +2

      What even does that mean? A Dwayne The Rock Johnson type of dude? All he does is pander to the largest possible audience and doesn't say anything even remotely offensive, and backpeddles on the rare occasion he does step on anyone's toes. He's almost like a walking politician except he doesn't actually have any type of political platform other than "Pls like me" or I suppose making his brand more profitable.
      If she, or anyone has ever actually listened to him talk for more than a couple of hours and across multiple sources/interviews, this is painfully obvious and apparent. Not even going into the fact he's apparently been caught lying, even about the dumbest of shit, multiple times.
      I feel the need to preface all of this by saying, I'm in no way a "hater" of him either, by any means. I dig several of the movies he's in and all, he's nothing to sneeze at in that way, but this statement just confused me.. The only conclusion I can come up with is that, for someone to make such a statement, what they ACTUALLY mean, is they either want someone they can walk all over that puts up no resistance and constantly caves into their every whim.. Or is this very superficially always perfect, always fake smiling type of person that you couldn't ever have a genuine conversation with or be emotionally vulnerable.
      Or, it's occurring to me mid typing this, possibly the most likely explanation, she actually has no idea and completely misused her words and what she actually meant was very superficially "I want a man who PHYSICALLY resembles The Rock" on an aesthetic, physical attraction level. But of course, people are hardly ever fucking honest and think that would sound scummy and shallow to admit that's how they actually feel, so for some fucking reason, claiming you want someone "like" him but not specifying the physical part only.
      Which is also kinda horrible, because.. what, you literally don't care whatsoever about the personality? Anything works, as long as you find him hot, huh? That's gonna work out swell.

    • @JPOGers
      @JPOGers 5 місяців тому

      @@gregnunes459
      Tldr

  • @felanm
    @felanm Рік тому +20

    The “little island” at 6:38 😂😂😂😂

  • @CrystalGregory
    @CrystalGregory Рік тому +59

    I think Michael is on video call for his own safety. There is no way he would survive the group session in person while sitting next to Angela 😅

  • @theoblongbox4909
    @theoblongbox4909 Рік тому +175

    Something is mentally wrong with Asuelu and his whole family. His sister and mother come across very mentally ill and he comes across a bit delayed.

    • @porcus123
      @porcus123 Рік тому +32

      Not many genetic varieties on islands, just saying.

    • @JudasMaccabeus1
      @JudasMaccabeus1 Рік тому +18

      They’re from a little island

    • @goldengoddess1723
      @goldengoddess1723 10 місяців тому +13

      Inbreeding

    • @IndigoBellyDance
      @IndigoBellyDance 9 місяців тому

      I believe it

    • @whiteobama3032
      @whiteobama3032 8 місяців тому +2

      Fr they all behave like they're characters in Always Sunny in Philadelphia

  • @batzgameguru
    @batzgameguru Рік тому +15

    This guy out here married, when I can't even get a reply

  • @757-David
    @757-David Рік тому +35

    The “ Little Island” line was good🤣

  • @KhalofKhals
    @KhalofKhals Рік тому +144

    Let’s not forget mental health is not a priority in some foreign countries where most people go undiagnosed. I feel Asuelu has a delay that was exhibited since we were first introduced to him. This is not only a language problem.

    • @blobbertmcblob4888
      @blobbertmcblob4888 Рік тому

      Guys just a moron. Probably has no education and was raised to believe he can be as lazy as he wants because he'd find a woman to take care of him.

    • @danichesney1876
      @danichesney1876 Рік тому +31

      He definitely seems to have some kind of delay

    • @jhunyormonttez7408
      @jhunyormonttez7408 Рік тому

      Definetely.

  • @le135
    @le135 Рік тому +24

    As a Samoan that was overseas in Samoan the same time with Asuelu, this man was casually going about his life doing anything and everything he wanted. We ALL thought he actually broke up with Kalani based on how he was acting about the island LOL

  • @xfroglips
    @xfroglips Рік тому +20

    Theres a chance that their kids think that he's their older brother...
    You aint wrong with that one 😂

  • @yessa1132
    @yessa1132 Рік тому +211

    Asuelo cries and expects everybody just feel sorry for him, and be forgiven. That’s not how marriage works.

    • @tikihutdweller5944
      @tikihutdweller5944 Рік тому +3

      Kalani is a cougar, not a victim. Kalani 28 almost 29 when she met Asuelu(around 21) an innocent island boy when she traveled all the way to Samoa. Once there she met Asuelu where is lured him in and seduced him into sleeping with her. She seduced him many times to get herself pregnant by this Samoan boy because she thought it would win over the approval of her father, who is a Samoan himself. Moreover, she managed to get herself pregnant a second time before she was even married. She did all this while not having any real bedroom fun with him and then married him where she has now been suffering over all of this for 7 years or so she says. She did this all so that she could have the 2 Samoan kids that she thought her father and she would want. Asuelu is the victim here, he just doesn't realize it. This woman has really twisted things around, all in her own mind. Kalani did this all for/to herself, case closed.

    • @yessa1132
      @yessa1132 Рік тому

      @@tikihutdweller5944 so your saying that Kalani had a gun over his head, and forced him to have sex with her? 😂 😂
      He just confessed to going to a party, and a girl offered him a BJ and he accepted right away. That man knows what his doing. 😒

    • @franco30528
      @franco30528 Рік тому +14

      @@tikihutdweller5944no one believes that crap

    • @mjl7437
      @mjl7437 Рік тому +1

      Kalani cries so everyone can feel sorry for her. She chose him even though the guy struggles to speak English and he’s slowly learning to adapt to life in a new country

  • @ITAPTF240
    @ITAPTF240 Рік тому +357

    I don't feel sorry for Kalani. The circumstances of their meeting, red flags were there, her family disapproved, and she still decided to marry this guy.

    • @BrandysASMRchannel
      @BrandysASMRchannel Рік тому +26

      Bingo

    • @tikihutdweller5944
      @tikihutdweller5944 Рік тому +28

      Kalani is a cougar, not a victim. Kalani 28 almost 29 when she met Asuelu(around 21) an innocent island boy when she traveled all the way to Samoa. Once there she met Asuelu where is lured him in and seduced him into sleeping with her. She seduced him many times to get herself pregnant by this Samoan boy because she thought it would win over the approval of her father, who is a Samoan himself. Moreover, she managed to get herself pregnant a second time before she was even married. She did all this while not having any real bedroom fun with him and then married him where she has now been suffering over all of this for 7 years or so she says. She did this all so that she could have the 2 Samoan kids that she thought her father and she would want. Asuelu is the victim here, he just doesn't realize it. This woman has really twisted things around, all in her own mind. Kalani did this all for/to herself, case closed.

    • @SA-ey6nt
      @SA-ey6nt Рік тому +71

      @@tikihutdweller5944 Couger? When you're a woman you're a "cougar" at 28? 😅 Man ya'll craxy. 7 years difference you become an old creep if you're a woman though

    • @dollinterrupted
      @dollinterrupted Рік тому +50

      @@tikihutdweller5944are you suggesting she SAed him? Because if not, it’s important to realize he was a grown man and they were both in their 20’s

    • @Blep303
      @Blep303 Рік тому +67

      @@tikihutdweller5944”innocent island boy” lmao they were both adults, stop trying to push a narrative

  • @krysangel8942
    @krysangel8942 Рік тому +47

    "If you give out a hall pass you better believe its gonna be used" True words lol🤣🤣🤣😂😂

  • @jolo3118
    @jolo3118 Рік тому +13

    Pretty sure they (TLC) keeps Michael away from Angela so they don't get dragged into a murder case 😂

  • @Gullydr
    @Gullydr Рік тому +31

    “I’m doing an Asuelu video, I don’t have to talk about this shit” 😂

  • @angela.6273
    @angela.6273 Рік тому +23

    “Maybe the unripe orange from three years finally hit him “ 😂😂😂😂😂😂 LORD

  • @q-onxy7095
    @q-onxy7095 Рік тому +59

    You get to cheat if you're from a small island 😂😂😂

  • @rebecca7410
    @rebecca7410 Рік тому +10

    Omg please edit in Angela shouting 'I'm an American' after Asuelu's dulcet 'Little Island' at some point in the future in a video 🤣🤣

    • @MrTangolizard
      @MrTangolizard 5 місяців тому +1

      With asuelus family saying where’s the money !

  • @andy42x
    @andy42x Рік тому +3

    2:48 The zoom in on his face with that blank stare. 💀 💀 💀

  • @AbzAden
    @AbzAden Рік тому +31

    Dude is on FaceTime while there having a couple therapy sessions 😂

  • @Michadoo
    @Michadoo Рік тому +211

    Asuelu has the mentality of a 10yo. Kalani knew that when she tried to make him a father and husband.

    • @samanthalake5011
      @samanthalake5011 Рік тому +7

      Three-year old.

    • @ckaybee
      @ckaybee Рік тому +1

      Preach on!

    • @jayg5650
      @jayg5650 Рік тому +11

      This is the part that everyone is missing. This is what happens when you try to make an adult instead of find one.

    • @The_oneand_Only1
      @The_oneand_Only1 Рік тому +3

      👏, I don’t understand how she thought it would get any better. He’s moved from one mother to a wife-mother.

    • @DiligentThroat
      @DiligentThroat Рік тому +2

      She was pregnant and trying to do the right thing. I don’t see how his shortcomings are her fault.

  • @luffylength
    @luffylength Рік тому +146

    I hate when you find a new UA-camr binge all their videos and then have to wait for that dopamine rush of them uploading a new one.
    It's a vicious cycle

  • @Bipolarintrovert
    @Bipolarintrovert Рік тому +2

    4:14 THAT ACCENT AND COMMENTARY 👌👌👌👌

  • @HikikomoriHanzo
    @HikikomoriHanzo Рік тому +2

    The funny thing is, my laptop shut off the moment Angela came on screen lmao like it hard reset and everything, the laptop was like "nope I'm noping tf outta here" 🤣🤣

  • @blyez2165
    @blyez2165 Рік тому +265

    With this new segment, imagine you are taking a vacation in a resort somewhere and the worst cast of TLC rolls in with their issues...
    It's like swimming on a lake and seeing someone pooping on the other side... I just wouldn't want to be there anymore

    • @Mvjesty23
      @Mvjesty23 Рік тому +23

      I would demand a refund 😭 imagine trying to relax and hearing Angela’s loud behind 😭

    • @ina-tajwedwab2486
      @ina-tajwedwab2486 Рік тому +5

      😂😂 are there other people there or did they rent the whole place for TLC?

  • @ilyassabdous6024
    @ilyassabdous6024 Рік тому +19

    you know the part that cracks me up everytime i watch quickslice videos is the random audios while someone is talking
    that shit gets me everytime

  • @fredskull1618
    @fredskull1618 Рік тому +14

    Jovi looks like a sales rep for a Roofie company

  • @Gizelle-cs6ix
    @Gizelle-cs6ix Рік тому +4

    I can’t stand your edits 🤣. So funny “little island”.

  • @laesha5670
    @laesha5670 Рік тому +48

    The fact she saved herself and waited to lose her v to THIS MAN CHILD and proceeded to push out 2 of his babies AGH😭

  • @forgettablegirl
    @forgettablegirl Рік тому +286

    I felt nauseous and gross when Kalani talked about how she figured out that he cheated.

    • @Keyleeth
      @Keyleeth Рік тому +9

      Can you explain to me please? I dont get it

    • @justmenonya932
      @justmenonya932 Рік тому +7

      Well she lied and manipulated him so idk you would because that is not at all how you get thrush

    • @Samibellasfar
      @Samibellasfar Рік тому

      ​@aoiferyan340 Usuelu was video chatting to Kilani and stuck his tongue out. It's white (there is a clear STD) and she asked him to tell the truth and he said that he kissed someone. After looking at the STD symptoms he confessed that the "kiss" was actually someone offering a blowjob

    • @miranndall69
      @miranndall69 Рік тому +65

      @@Keyleethhis tongue was white which is called thrush. It’s caused by the same overgrowth of fungus as a yeast infection. It’s usually caused by poor dental hygiene but I’m assuming it made kalani suspicious and he just admitted to the affair.

    • @truphat2day
      @truphat2day Рік тому +5

      I thought she was insinuating thrush but that doesn’t just happen immediately after 1 kiss. Actually if I’m not mistaken you generally get it with HIV🤔

  • @erockromulan9329
    @erockromulan9329 Рік тому +40

    I have stopped everything and put my life on hold to watch this new QuickSlice video.

    • @Gullydr
      @Gullydr Рік тому +4

      Right? Same. Except this cannabis. 😂

    • @erockromulan9329
      @erockromulan9329 Рік тому +3

      @@Gullydr Put it in the air!

  • @paintitblack9712
    @paintitblack9712 Рік тому +178

    I cant see Angela without thinking: " iM aN aMeRiCaN "😅

    • @Ass_of_Amalek
      @Ass_of_Amalek Рік тому +17

      I can't see angela without seeing her neck and chest wrinkle covering covid mask.

    • @derrickjenkins2455
      @derrickjenkins2455 Рік тому +9

      "Mikaaahl!!!!"

    • @BrooklynBaby100
      @BrooklynBaby100 Рік тому +5

      Why can’t we make shirts with her face on them and sell them in the South!?! 😂

    • @drews2444
      @drews2444 Рік тому +2

      MAGA

    • @ILookLikeDrakeSoYeah
      @ILookLikeDrakeSoYeah Рік тому +3

      And she said it in the most gangster way 🤣

  • @tebikei
    @tebikei Рік тому +1

    9:07 “Little island Speech” 😂😂
    Hey I’m also from the island.
    But the ending of this video is hilarious!😂😂

  • @ladysammymm
    @ladysammymm Рік тому +184

    I have no empathy for Kalani why would she even consider sleeping with him hes clearly mentally incapacitated.

    • @JordanWilliams-ix2td
      @JordanWilliams-ix2td Рік тому +15

      im in tears lmfao!

    • @SandraUrquia
      @SandraUrquia Рік тому +38

      Right? Like taking advantage of someone who rides the Short Bus! 🚌

    • @Moonee-Adam
      @Moonee-Adam Рік тому +26

      lol for real. She gives me predator vibes. It’s not normal for an adult, sane woman to sleep, marry and have babies with someone that is mentally impaired.

    • @animezae
      @animezae Рік тому +10

      Exactly. She preyed on him just to play on his shortcomings so he looks like a manipulator & she can play victim.

    • @ashleyjones5396
      @ashleyjones5396 Рік тому +5

      @@animezae exactly! She is a manipulator and loves to be in control. She is loving how he looks like the bad person and she is the victim. Yes he did wrong, but she is not right. Also, I feel she uses the kids against him. He has no say in their marriage. In addition to him being a little delayed, I feel he is depressed.

  • @whyamilikethis1998
    @whyamilikethis1998 Рік тому +60

    I wonder (by Asuelu's logic) how small an island has to be to justify cheating. I'm from Ireland, but I imagine it's too big an island to qualify? What surface area is Asuelu's cutoff point? 🤔

    • @onemanturret1641
      @onemanturret1641 Рік тому +8

      Anything bigger than Hawaii is too big for allowing cheating. Australia gets an exception cuse it’s the biggest island. Kinda like you can burn yourself with heat and cold.
      Tasmania is the exception of Australia because it’s an island, but part of the country of Australia.

    • @whyamilikethis1998
      @whyamilikethis1998 Рік тому +4

      @@onemanturret1641 smh guess I'll just have to never cheat on anyone, so unfair :(

    • @tiredsisyphus7802
      @tiredsisyphus7802 Рік тому +1

      Pleassee😂😂😂

    • @salleymudd5488
      @salleymudd5488 Рік тому +4

      Looking at Asuelu I think his cut off point is sober girls.

    • @dianejacobs3835
      @dianejacobs3835 Рік тому

      😂😂😂

  • @samu999
    @samu999 Рік тому +63

    hahahahaha that zoomed in picture of Asuelu looking miserable while she's reading the brochure made me laugh out loud!!

  • @RemyBeast
    @RemyBeast Рік тому +72

    Well I would say any decent counselor would tell them to get off TV if they actually value their relationship.

    • @ketchupisasmoothie
      @ketchupisasmoothie Рік тому +5

      Or their mental well-being. Take these TLC therapists with a grain of salt 🙄

  • @DovaBunny
    @DovaBunny Рік тому +1

    I cracked up when you edited " I come from a little island" 😂

  • @thlee3
    @thlee3 Рік тому +2

    the placements of “little island” are masterful

  • @candicenicole1219
    @candicenicole1219 Рік тому +26

    “That’s what I lubbb about MaCHAellll”
    QUICKSLICE’s “Kewl” has me in tears 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @whoswhoatthezoo9372
    @whoswhoatthezoo9372 Рік тому +74

    Having been cheated on myself in the early 90’s, the thing that angered me the most was the fact that std’s are mostly spread the same way. If someone can infect you with Syphilis for example, they can just as easily and in the same manner, infect you with HIV. Up until recently that meant that your cheating partner not only signed their own death warrant, but yours as well AND potentially resulted in your children being orphans.
    In reference to thrush, it’s unusual to catch it through sex/kissing but not impossible. Personally, I get it from
    antibiotics, so I have always had to make sure to take probiotics for the ‘good bacteria’ if I’m prescribed penicillin
    for any reason.

    • @Zarastro54
      @Zarastro54 Рік тому

      Did you catch something being cheated on?

    • @Katsanargle
      @Katsanargle Рік тому +11

      Such an important message to spread fr. Random, I also get thrush yet I'm fully asexual lol. So the prebiotic tip is very helpful!!! Thanks!

    • @Mikael-jt1hk
      @Mikael-jt1hk Рік тому

      yeah thats not how stds work lol. Almost no people in the western world has HIV. Its like 20 something in my entire country. Compare that to the MILLION people with herpes and its very much not the same.

  • @ny_cruz
    @ny_cruz Рік тому +34

    Asuelu: That guy is a real jerk!
    Everybody: That guy is you. It’s literally you. She’s talking about you!!
    😂

    • @kolaoshun6298
      @kolaoshun6298 9 місяців тому

      Self-awareness found in a ditch.

  • @St.OlGa.
    @St.OlGa. Рік тому +15

    Who in their mind has concensual encounter with Asuelu... he is a emodiment of a man child with learning difficulties

  • @khemetbey803
    @khemetbey803 Рік тому +13

    It's funny that Asuelu does look like he doesn't know his wife was talking about him

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому +4

      I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't, he has always seemed a bit delayed.

    • @khemetbey803
      @khemetbey803 Рік тому +3

      @@LilLadyAy Probably not the sharpest tool in the shed

  • @a.r.8954
    @a.r.8954 Рік тому +276

    The Kalani and Asuelu thing is really upsetting because Asuelu is so obviously both cognitively impaired and raised horribly with diminished empathy (his mom--like wow) and total entitlement as a man to do whatever he wants without any consequences. Whereas Kalani appears to be a beautiful, intelligent woman who is clearly only with this joke of a man because he impregnated her and she thought she was doing the right thing. He can never be anything close to what she needs or deserves and she could cut him off completely.

    • @floro6632
      @floro6632 Рік тому

      Well, sounds like you want to be with her! Go on. Get her, big boy/girl!
      You do know, that with your all-knowing written diarrhoea, you just shat on pretty much 70% of how the world works, if not more?
      Stay in the U.S., or wherever you’re from. And keep being unhappy, seemingly unknowingly why…?!
      And I’m saying this from a « well-raised boy » point of view. But the lack of discernement from what different cultures mean, just stay where you are and keep being unhappy. I know, you’re gonna say you’re happily married. Well good luck to him/ her.
      Stop the rushed judgment. Cause he’s closer to the truth of what us human are, than any of us westerners will ever go back to.
      Good luck in life though, truthfully and sincerely!
      Love. And peace.

    • @Jennifer42590
      @Jennifer42590 Рік тому +24

      She should leave while he´s bussy eating unripe oranges

    • @samsongomah1318
      @samsongomah1318 Рік тому +50

      When I look at Kalani I don't see someone beautiful and intelligent. Beautiful and intelligent women don't loose their virginity to island boys on holiday, marry them after forgetting the condom, and then have a second child after the marriage was already in the tank.

    • @abie4230
      @abie4230 Рік тому +28

      I had the same thought with the cognitive impairment. Do you think it’s a language barrier thing though? Like is he smart in his own language? Lol

    • @AngiO-f1s
      @AngiO-f1s Рік тому

      ​@@abie4230Asuelu is the village idiot in every language

  • @gruss512
    @gruss512 Рік тому +92

    I don't feel bad for her. She knew who she laid down with! She tried to make a Caveman a modern day man.🤔

  • @michelleallred8521
    @michelleallred8521 Рік тому +40

    Hes never been nothing but a big man baby!!!!! Hearing Kalani breaking down crying broke my heart. And she shouldn't have ever taken that hall pass!! That sadly puts her down to his level.

    • @ThouSwell-zx3fd
      @ThouSwell-zx3fd Рік тому +5

      I think it's great that she took it and greater still that she actually connected to the guy.

    • @michelleallred8521
      @michelleallred8521 Рік тому +3

      @@ThouSwell-zx3fd as far as teaching him a lesson, yes she should have. But now she can't even know she's that much better than he is. Id love to see if work for the kids sake, but I don't think this dude will EVER grow up. And using the "i come from a small island is absolutely positively does NOT excuse ANY of his actions.

    • @blobbertmcblob4888
      @blobbertmcblob4888 Рік тому +3

      @@ThouSwell-zx3fd Then you're no better of a person than she is.

  • @Nominaze
    @Nominaze Рік тому +2

    Michael being on that video call reminds of that episode of ANT Farm 😂😂

  • @kingx76x
    @kingx76x Рік тому +3

    “Little Island”😂😂😂😭

  • @catwhspr
    @catwhspr Рік тому +32

    Thank you, I needed a good laugh today. This is one of your best so far, please keep up the good work!

    • @paolalopez518
      @paolalopez518 Рік тому +3

      Yes! I really enjoyed this one!🤣

    • @Debra17
      @Debra17 Рік тому +3

      I Lol thru the whole thing even tho the couples are dealing with such sensitive topics.
      @TheQuickSlice is Hilarious!!! 🤣🤣🤣

  • @Curly_Queen_Bee
    @Curly_Queen_Bee Рік тому +4

    I really hate this guy. One thing I noticed because I’m a mom, it’s the fact that he acts so immature, so immature, in fact that he ran out into the ocean in his underwear. While I was watching the episode, I noticed that after he did that his kids had taken off their pants and were walking around the resort in their underwear in a diaper. Look, if you’re not a parent, you may not understand this, however, you don’t want your child walking around like that because you don’t know what kind of creeps are walking around. It’s so strange and bizarre to me that someone would allow their children to walk around a public place with a shirt and their underwear and a diaper. If they’re at home, who cares, however, when your child is out in public, you should definitely be more aware of what’s happening. He’s setting a horrible example for his children. My husband watched the episode with me and said, “some people shouldn’t have kids.” He’s kinda right.

  • @aliya6158
    @aliya6158 Рік тому +11

    She looks so done with him, she got to the point then she is just drinking water while Asuelo on fire.

  • @Mega866
    @Mega866 Рік тому +2

    “Little Island” was killing me! Lol

  • @troygrzybowski6907
    @troygrzybowski6907 Рік тому +6

    Your Angela impression gets me every time 😂

  • @TheJazzypenn
    @TheJazzypenn Рік тому +7

    Lol the “little island” sound bites get me every time 😭

  • @wandamiancrucifixplate3760
    @wandamiancrucifixplate3760 Рік тому +8

    Omg big daddy slice, you have no idea how long I've been waiting for this!!

  • @blakeharrison3972
    @blakeharrison3972 Рік тому +5

    I love how Big Edward just stares at the sky all the time, whether he’s in the conversation or not

  • @sierragayle123
    @sierragayle123 Рік тому +2

    The little island 🏝 omggg 😂😂🤣🤣😭😭😭

  • @hollyhocknguyen2424
    @hollyhocknguyen2424 Рік тому +20

    Unlike the other people whose true intentions or character we don't see until later on, Asuelu was a man-child from day one and has been true to that till now. I don't understand why Kalani fell for him.

  • @stonediguanas
    @stonediguanas Рік тому +7

    Hell yeah I was just starting to run outta things to watch by you! 😅😂

  • @Quan6969
    @Quan6969 Рік тому +17

    Maybe Asuelu is just always high 😂

  • @aaronborbahlyngdoh5970
    @aaronborbahlyngdoh5970 Рік тому +4

    "little island" 🤣🤣🤣

  • @natashaxnichole
    @natashaxnichole Рік тому +2

    “There’s a chance that his kids just think he’s their older brother” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @nookac0la
    @nookac0la Рік тому +1

    “When I say something nasty he does blush”
    i have never heard that before lmao

  • @bieberninja1
    @bieberninja1 Рік тому +16

    i thought kalani's dad was going to beat the crap out of asuelu if he ever disrespected his family? asuelu has done everything he can to be disrespectful and nothing from the dad who literally threatened asuelu on every episode they were on

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому +4

      Her dad is an all talk uncle T, called it from their debut.

    • @bieberninja1
      @bieberninja1 Рік тому +1

      @@LilLadyAy asuelu probably bribed him with his porn stash

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому +2

      @@bieberninja1 nobody can convince me that thing in real.🤣

    • @bieberninja1
      @bieberninja1 Рік тому

      @@LilLadyAy what thing?

    • @LilLadyAy
      @LilLadyAy Рік тому

      @@bieberninja1 the moustache

  • @Womper1992
    @Womper1992 Рік тому +13

    wow that Angela part is nuts. Michael doesn't get to go to the beach, but she does

  • @hamiltonhaugh3982
    @hamiltonhaugh3982 Рік тому +6

    When I saw this I KNEW I need to watch this season. Big fan and was waiting for you to review this

  • @NomNomGirl1
    @NomNomGirl1 Рік тому +108

    Kalani had a one night stan with Asuelo there's no way in a week she thought she could love and trust a stranger. It sucks that he cheated but she needs to be honest

    • @Ed-zp2xo
      @Ed-zp2xo Рік тому +4

      Yeah Kalani is a liar. Remember when she tried to present the family trip to her family (who hate Asuelu) as something she was doing for him to make up for the fact that he couldn't bring his kids to Samoa? 😂

    • @frostnova2144
      @frostnova2144 Рік тому +8

      Kalani was a virgin though thats the thing so regardless of the circumstance she wanted to justify the fact that she slept with him. She clearly didn't realise who she chose, but at this point after having his kids I don't think she can do any better

    • @blobbertmcblob4888
      @blobbertmcblob4888 Рік тому

      @@frostnova2144 If you believe she was a virgin then you are an idiot. No way that girl was a virgin.

    • @user-pf1fr2zg1e
      @user-pf1fr2zg1e Рік тому +11

      @@frostnova2144she was 29 years old. She knew exactly what she was doing.

    • @frostnova2144
      @frostnova2144 Рік тому +1

      @@user-pf1fr2zg1e that has nothing to do with my comment,
      But I don't know how someone who would bank everything on a useless human being like aseulu could, at any point, *"know what they're doing"*

  • @cecileevans4033
    @cecileevans4033 Рік тому +149

    He seems neurodivergent. The way he hits his head when emotionally overwhelmed. He needs a life coach and possibly medication. His unchecked mental health has gotta be tough on the whole family 🙁

    • @h0t_pock3t
      @h0t_pock3t Рік тому +20

      As someone neurodivergent, I think it's way more severe than that.😬 It seems more like emotional issues than being divergent, like a total lack of empathy/emotional intelligence.

    • @EarlyBirdCraft
      @EarlyBirdCraft Рік тому

      Yes he’s definitely autistic

    • @Kai...999
      @Kai...999 Рік тому +5

      ​@@h0t_pock3tNeuorodivergent is a blanket term without much merit.

    • @h0t_pock3t
      @h0t_pock3t Рік тому +12

      @@Kai...999 To my knowledge, it means more like ADHD, autism, etc. He could be, but again, I think it's more than a neuro difference. As mentioned, he seems to have a huge lack in empathy, which isn't usually a marker for what I think of with neurodiversity. Maybe that's my mistake, or maybe I just REALLY dont want to be grouped in with someone like Asuelu. I also hit myself out of emotional distress, but it's not because of things like my autism. I often can't regulate my emotions due to things like OCD, BPD, or post-trauma symptoms.

    • @rizkiramadhan9266
      @rizkiramadhan9266 Рік тому +2

      You'd think that would've been mentioned on his season. No, he isn't.

  • @mimih23
    @mimih23 Рік тому +8

    He was a child when they got involved. He was continuously a child throughout the relationship. Why do we expect more?