When mental illness enters the family | Dr. Lloyd Sederer | TEDxAlbany
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- Опубліковано 5 січ 2015
- This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences. What must families know if they have a loved one with a mental illness? In his talk, Dr. Lloyd Sederer discusses the four things we all must know to help those who may be struggling around us.
Lloyd I. Sederer, M.D., is Medical Director of the New York State Office of Mental Health (OMH), the nation’s largest state mental health system. He provides medical leadership for a $3.6 billion/year mental health system which annually serves over 700,000 people and includes 24 hospitals, 90 clinics, two research institutes, and community services throughout a state of ~ 19 million people.
Dr. Sederer is an Adjunct Professor at the Columbia/Mailman School of Public Health.
Previously, Dr. Sederer served as the Executive Deputy Commissioner for Mental Hygiene Services in NYC, the City’s “chief psychiatrist.” He also has been Medical Director and Executive Vice President of McLean Hospital in Belmont, MA, a Harvard teaching hospital, and Director of the Division of Clinical Services for the American Psychiatric Association.
In 2013, Dr. Sederer was given the Irma Bland Award for Excellence in Teaching Residents by the American Psychiatric Association, which in 2009 recognized him as the Psychiatric Administrator of the Year. He also has been awarded a Scholar-in-Residence grant by the Rockefeller Foundation and an Exemplary Psychiatrist award from the National Alliance on Mental Illness. He has published seven books for professional audiences and two books for lay audiences, as well as over 400 articles in medical journals and non-medical publications including TheAtlantic.com, The New York Times/The International Herald Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, WashingtonPost.com, Commonweal Magazine, and Psychology Today. He is Medical Editor for Mental Health for the Huffington Post where ~ 200 his posts and videos have appeared.
In 2013, Dr. Sederer published The Family Guide to Mental Health Care (Foreword by Glenn Close), for families of people with mental illness. He also has co-authored, with Jay Neugeboren and Michael Friedman, The Diagnostic Manual of Mishegas (The DMOM), a parody on the DSM.
Dr. Sederer appears regularly on radio and television. His website is www.askdrlloyd.com.
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I have a brother who suffers from severe bi polar, schizophrenia and other mental illnesses. It hurts me to my core that my family and myself can't really do anything about it. It's almost as if he's on drugs but he's not on drugs. It's really sad and depressing. If anyone else out there is going through this I feel for you and my heart it with you and your loved one(s). We need to find a solution to these problems. It's as if I'm trying to cope with a death that hasn't happened yet. I just miss my bro. Love you cheeks. :,(
giancarlo franco I'm going trough the exact same thing.. I'm loosing it and it hurts not knowing what to do to help
Carmen Vargas learn to have patience. That is all you can do. Never give up on your loved one. Do lots and lots of research. Try to go to as many seminars as you can and educate yourself on how to deal with someone who suffers from mental health. Look up NAMI and other mental health organizations. Good luck, and never give up.
Carmen Vargas me too. it's heart wrenching
giancarlo franco I also have said that my son's mental issues are like i have to deal with a death of the person I knew and raised, but he is still alive. Hard, very hard. My heart is breaking.
Your not alone
The toughest thing is when the family member does not think they have a problem and actively resists efforts to help. It’s hard to know what to do.
Exactly
Exactly. Me and my family is going through this with my brother right now😢.
I am currently going through a bit of a crisis, and I am resisting help from my parents, particularly my mother.
Me and my siblings all have some level of PTSD from being raised by my mother. I am the youngest of three and by the time I arrived mom was at peak stress and it stayed that way until a few years after all of us kids left the house. I believe my mom is undiagnosed bipolar.
I have been struggling to graduate undergraduate for the past few years and go through bouts of depression and suicidality. I have ADHD (which may just be a manifestation of cPTSD) that gets exponentially worse the longer I am exposed to my mom.
My mom is currently doing alright mental health wise, wants to help me who is going through a bout of depression, but I can’t tell her that she makes my mental state worse and is the cause of PTSD in me. She will spiral given this information.
Your family may be rejecting your help, but genuinely ask yourself if you have contributed/do contribute to an immediate worsening of their condition
My sister doesn't think she's manic or bipolar. She's been manic/psychotic for months.
@@deescorpio8454 same here
I don't know who needs to read this, but I love you, you are strong and not alone in this fight. Get the help you need and think positively we are going to get over this together .
I love you
You are a badass
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
God loves you too!! You are VERY valuable
Thank you. 🙏🏻
Thanks
I appreciate what you said, but I'm really a hopeless case. My family has left me on the Streets for thirty because I have a middle illness
Dealing with my mother and brother. They've schizophrenia and it's driving me nuts. I did everything I possibly could. But, I'm getting tired..been dealing with them for 5-6 years.
It's hard
What would make the situation a bit more bearable? What support do you need? Reach out - talking to someone who understands like a counsellor can be freeing. Good luck to you.
Keep it up dude, me too in 10 years it was hard
Same here dear 😟
I am done
Dr. Sederer condensed in only 15 minutes a lot of pragmatic information about how to deal with a mentally ill family member. Most families do not know what to do and this is a great service to them. Pass this around!
Hey Robert, it's true, the families are totally left in the dark in so many ways. I have been there first hand. I've started an advocacy channel for families and loved ones to find community and support! Don't take the journey alone, there is hope!
Robert...can u help me???im alone ,have noone to take care f me,can u???im vv upset😭😭😭😭😭
@@theglasshouseproject2920 can u plzz..plz..plzzzz take me there,i need true help to recover,im all alone,help me😭😭😭😭😭
These TEDx talks about dealing with mental illness in families have helped me so much. After 10 years of dealing with a family member with a very specific type of psychosis , I realized that I did most everything wrong. While that makes me feel bad, hearing these talks makes me feel that I'm not alone in my feelings of failure because many other families have done the same.
What you did wrong??
You're certainly not alone. I feel your pain. I'm reminded daily how we ruined our sons life. Going on 13 years of freaking with this
@@patg555 i can deeply understand your pain
What is the right thing? There's no way to know if doing everything right could have changed anything.
I'm attending the FBI National Academy in Quantico, VA right now while simultaneously attempting to assist a brother who has had a complete psychotic break after he recovered from COVID-19. My elderly mother is left to deal with his psychosis alone. I decided to focus one of my research projects on effective communication with a mentally ill family member. I have found this Ted talk extremely helpful. Thank you Dr.
I am worried when I am gone who will take care of my son. My wife will be like your mom one day, while taking care of her own illness. Will his younger brother has to be like you? 🥲. You are a savior for your family. God bless you.
Mental health destroyed my beautiful family. Had to let my husband go. Had to choose me abd our daughter. It hurts me everyday. He was the sweetest person I have ever met. It was difficult let him go. I could not help him and I did know what he could do to me and our daughter once he was not himself. The saddest thing is that I resented him about it sometimes while he really could not help it. Praying for all going through this 🙏
No one in their right mind would fall in love with and marry someone who is mentally ill and not without a doctors permission. Common sense would say to marry someone who is healthy and a member of society.
I am in this with one foot out the door. I feel exactly how you felt, grief, bitterness, resentment,hurt, loss, numb. Confused. Thank you for sharing.
Where did he go live after you ended the relationship?
Thank you for this Post. My entire family suffers mental illness addictions and for years I've fought all of them. Now I'm seeking to become better for myself and I give all of my family members to God. I pray without ceasing. I'm so tired of this fight. I am not ok but I'm clean I want help so I can help my family and others I love and care about in hopes of someday helping my community It all stems from our childhood. Thank you. ❣️🙏
I couldn't stop listening to this professional. Awesome, great job. Incredible to have people like this in the world. Thank you
Help plzzzzzz😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I am a Ted Talk junkie and this is the most helpful talk I have ever watched!
Hey Robin, I have recently started a channel dedicated to the caretakers and loved ones of the mentally imbalanced, and if you felt this one to be helpful, I think you may find hope in my channel, The Glass House Project. Find community, support, and compassion.
THEE BEST VIDEO RE DEALING W/A LOVED ONE'S MENTAL ILLNESS!
You'll find that the families are more distressed than the person with the so called "illness"...
Yea...im going thru it too. Its ruff dealing with her. Im only dealing with it because of the kids. Dont no how much longer ill b able to withstand the verbal abuse and shouting matches 😔
Sometimes.
Yeah I really hope that my mom recovers from her schizoaffective disorder it is an exhausting process. I have been my mom's caregiver. it's one of the hardest challenges!! i just want her to be happy with her life
I also have a schizophrenic mom, it's the worst. I can't really help her much cause she doesn't believe that she has it.
@@qqqhv8777 yes I know what you mean it is the hardest battle
There is no recovery, only degradation.
@@hienienguyen6766 . True . This is a battle,im through the same
Thank you for this heartfelt, obviously experience backed message.
Thank you. You gave me hope as a parent.
This was really needed for my family and I. Thanks so much.
The healty system it's not there for us. Peoples that need longest therapy the most often have the least money to go to the therapiste.
A lot of the places only really give you 6 months also before they “ graduate “ you from their program.
frik Stigma for many illnesses, Addiction being one, hard to get help if the shame is to great.
Thank you for making this comment section feel like a community.
Thank you❤
Thank you, sometimes family loses hope this type of talk gives hope to many
Thank you so much for this talk. I needed this guidance in helping my mother. It's really hard and now I won't go after the marathon alone. This man is amazing!
Hi Caroline, I have walked a pretty dark journey with being a caretaker to my mother with a deep mental imbalance, and I know how alone and scary it can be. I have created a channel that gives support, guidance, and community. There is hope, and things will get better!
I too have experienced voices in my ears and thoughts that are not mine. please listen to my story on UA-cam at Hearing Voices: Real Help and Understanding. The Lord helped me in this battle and can help anyone else who will believe God. praying for you all, Carol
Thanks for talking about the thinking
thank you for info and encouragement
Life is hard but a family member with mental illness without any cure is the hardest to live with. Unable to do anything to save them from this trauma 🥲. I just want to end my life but than who else is there to take care of family. It's just there to be suffered 😓
I totally understand what you are feeling but, please don’t lose hope! I have a younger sister and my heart breaks everyday for her and for my mom. I lost my father 2 years ago. I was a drug addict for 5 years. I’m clean for 2 years now and it was the hardest thing to overcome! Don’t stop wanting to live! God loves you very much! Never forget it. Life is a gift! I just got into a fight with my sister last night. I still worry about her but, I’m not desperate anymore! Go ahead and pray and I will pray for your faith to have no borders.
@@Aleksandra.DaGreat very true. Now the things are much better. I think we should always keep on trying. Results may or may not follow but there is no other way. Keep on pushing everyday can be difficult initially. Hope you too get what you want. Life is too short to worry about negative things. Happy new year!!
Depression sounds like a very benign condition. But I can tell you it's very difficult to motivate to even get up from your bed, go out to fetch your food and take care of your personal needs including visiting doctors for your regular check ups. The other social challenges are even more daunting like climbing a steep mountain. I am left wondering what exactly am I doing on this planet? Struggling to keep myself alive? The purpose of life has been robbed by this illness.
100%True.. U stole my heart words...im also left wondering the purpose f my tortured life with no hope,no goal,finding no way to get relief...I dream,wish that u were here in Pakistan with me😭😭😭😭😭😭😞
Very useful information. Thank you.
Aw... He's wonderful!! Great advice!! 😮 Thank you... God bless!!!
This was very helpful advice.Thank You.
This was an excellent help. Thank you.
Was violently attacked by my brother while he was in a psychosis after suggesting he take medication.
Your not alone.
Spot on.Realistic and practical advice
Well said. Thanks for your message.
Thank you so much
Thank you 🙏
on my watchlist for later. seems relevant and important.
Sad that your parents don't support you .I have been told to love and keep loving
Thank u for this!
This is a valuable , practical video. Many families will benefit from his advice. I am grateful that Dr. Sederer is such a passionate mental health advocate.
Barbara, The Glass House Project is a new channel and community for those struggling to deal with loved ones with a mental imbalance. Find support!
What about dealing with a mother that refuses that she's ill in the first place? she denies having any problem yet ruining the lives of her own family in every way. A mother who's an emotional and physical abuser of her children, and i'm 27 speaking. You're talking about taking care of mentally ill loved ones, understanding them and supporting them but what about us? the people suffering because of those dear ones in our life, what about our mental health with all the negativity going on, on a daily basis caused by that family member?
We've suffered with our mother ever since we were conscious, our dad too ever since he knew her. you ask people not to get into fights and not show any negative reaction. This is exactly what hurts, expecting us to be angels with mentally ill loved ones no matter how severe their condition is and how hurtful they are towards their family next to refusing to even admit there is anything wrong with them. Our mother is a disaster to our family in ways we can't begin to describe and we don't know what to do it's heartbreaking.
Sometimes it's very difficult to control your own temper and sanity and it hurts alot
I am sorry to hear, I know it can be very frustrating and one feels helpless managing a patient at home. I do not know where you are located but have you tried out support groups for caregivers?Support groups for caregivers are available in various countries for caregivers to patients of long drawn illnesses like various psychiatric disorders.p
Maybe you can talk to your GP about it?
Yes! The “normal” ones become punching bags while the mentally ill has to be tolerated, ignored, excused, supported, loved…
Thank youuuuu!!!!!
I need help. My brother has had anger problems his whole life, but the past 5-6 months have been horrible and it’s only getting worse. He’s 15, smells bad , stays LOCKED in his room , cant properly communicate , etc.. but tonight it was the worst. My older brother snapped at him and it ended with everything destroyed and my little brother bleeding out bad. He’s in the hospital right now it looked like a horror movie. He was laughing the whole time. It is killing my entire family and him, my parents won’t sleep at night exhausted from working all day
I don't know what to say. Your family is at the beginning of a long journey. Try to get your parents to do some research so that they will be able to weigh the long term effects of the drugs the doctors will give him. So sorry.
thank u... im a sufferer throughout past 6 years real bad, no medical help except e.r.s... and my family disowned me once i started crying alot, after then 3 years of suicide attepts, went without food shelter, clothing, medical care, lots of pain. Family couldve helped much. Im about to finally get disability and have started rebuilding my life alone.
good for you! you deserve it!
:) thanks John....and I've had undiagnosed bipolar disorder, I'm now 38 and was just diagnosed last year which illness is bad enough to disable me. I have nightmares every night, just really hard to live through stuff. So, thank you for your kind words.
good luck :)
***** why what?
Why was the disability so important that it had to be mentioned?
Rebuilding alone is this best thing for you, because you need to be in a controlled environment. your therapists and counselors need access to you on a daily basis.
Do you have a plan that when you're well enough, you'll apologize to every person whose lives you damaged? Don't say you don't need to. You know there's a string of people, family and friends, who need to know you are genuinely sorry for all the hell you caused them.
Wait until you're well enough to make it count, wait until you really mean it, and wait until they're seeing you getting well enough to become a functioning member of society again. You'll have a lot of skepticism to face, but if you're genuinely willing to eat humble pie, in time you will gain their acceptance of your apologies, which you DO owe them.
You may never regain their trust or friendship, though. Expect that. Once you destroy trust in people, they're harder to regain than a walled fort.
Best wishes on your full recovery.
I know where it comes from--feeling unloved and then your family starts treating you as a second class citizen because of course your mentally ill which is a downward spirial into oblivion
Totally true
Drs and therapists and case workers often do too
So true... Some people prefer to abandon a family member even if it increases the risk of them killing themselves, instead of questioning their own behaviour towards them, which is also a reason for them getting sick in the first place.
It's important to break the cycle. Don't repeat the pattern. Education helps.
I rarely ask for help. I only do when I'm really really struggling. I went to my sister and she told me she just wants to be happy. I guess I dont. I have hallucinations a lot and I guess I'm a lost cause. She would never smile or talk to me friendly in a room unless my mom was there. She grey stoned me. I finally got the message.
This talk is a wonderful hopeful message. I would like to learn more about using leverage with a MI loved one. If anyone has resources that specify exactly how to do this please share!
This may be true in a lot of cases, but when it comes to narcisistic parents there's nothing to do except going away and never coming back even once
It sounds like your poor parents have an ungrateful, entitled, selfish kid, in other words, you sound like a narcissist.
this brain activity you see is actually the brain shutting down
Diane Dunn
Thank you Dr. Sederer for your calm demeanor and practical advice to help guide and support families and people affected by mental illness. I have known about NAMI since 2005 and it is very supportive to families. Finding out about you via U tube is fantastic though! Kinda like a shot of vitamin B as I continue in the marathon of advocacy. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
I can't wait to read your books!
My father has also recently started showing signs of severe mental illness. Thank you for posting this video. If there is anyone out there who dealing with a parent with the same condition as mine, feel free to get in touch with me. Maybe together we can solve this problem. Two heads are always better than one.
MAYANK SHARMA all of my my family members deal with mental illness except me and i really want to talk to someone who is dealing with the same
My mom has it trying to educate myself on how to deal with this
Research a Dr.Hoffer
My sister is like a ticking timebomb when she gets angry or depressed about something she gets really aggressive and I always have anxiety when she's around even if she's doing ok. I don't know what to do because it really affects me but I don't want it to. Any extra tips pleaseee?
Natalia Pineda you should try to put her in sports because when I was younger I was an EXTREMELY angry child, I did hurt people and I exploded with rage over the little things. So my parents put me in a fighting sport (boxing) and I used my anger as my fuel and now I'm doing great! I'm more sociable and happier. I don't explode over the littlest of things and hurt loved ones, but that's only my suggestion
Natalia Pineda my brother punches, kicks, chokes me as he is mentally ill and has knocked me into a mild concussion and broke my nose in 2005
Natalia Pineda same thing w me :(
Claudia Vlahović what if she’s not able to stay away? It’s not always so simple as “ stay away “.
I know me, I have mental illness. I have more than one type. One of the things that I personally need is for family not to “ remind” me about my mental health issues.
Listen to your sister, if you can, don’t say stuff like you only feel this way because of your mental “ illness “. Most of the time when I need to say something my family members aren’t gonna like I would be more willing to hear solutions. If my mental “ illness “ is not brought poorly into the conversation.
If you look on my Facebook profile. My bio says that I am stronger than my “ special abilities “. I also don’t want my “ special abilities “ used against me.
That not good. We should not have to wrap our lives around someone elses. Your mental health is just as important as hers. Is it posdible to say something like: you scare me when you do this or that. Dont take it out on me. Be very specific about a practical example. Because if you say: your whole presence is ruining the atmosphere: she might think you dont want her to live there at all. So something like: " i love you this and that but when you do so and so (one particular not too general example) it makes me nervous etc. I cannot solve your problem. Maybe i can distract you with fun things but i cannot go into your anxiety mood".
Yes families should be allowed to give medical help and care to patients. How and why will a mental patient give permission to his family for his treatment.
What to do when our loved one with mental illness is in denial about taking medication?
Check out Dr Xavier Amador's videos.
They're all in denial that their behavior is very wrong, immoral, and self sabotaging. They literally don't care. It's like they live in their own world with different rules and standards. It is absolutely sick.
@@marinesreccy6452 wrong? Immoral? But It's not their fault. People with psychotic conditions don't think they have a problem. Schizophrenia is a very good example of this. My dad has been schizophrenic for 9 years now and till date refuses to believe that something's wrong with him. But we give him the meds (it was very hard at first) and he trusts us and just takes it now. He's obviously feeling a good change inside but refuses to acknowledge it.
I myself suffer from Bi Polar 2 disorder and clinical depression along with PTSD and I am on disability because of it and my spinal issues. I have noticed in the last 10 years my mental issues have gotten a lot worse in the fact that I am depressed more often than not. I'm not suicidal or feel like EVER harming another person but I am frustrated because it has broken me off from the only family I have left and it's not because they don't love me or me loving them back it's because they just can't grasp the problems I have and when I say things they consider out of line they take them personally when I some of the time don't even remember saying it or when I said it, it came out the totally wrong way that I intended it to. I have 1 brother and he lives near me somewhat and I am a cancer patient also I just finished my last round of chemo and am awaiting results of my cat scan's. My parents are very old 98 and 94 and they live down south and left a VERY sizable amount of gift's to my brother and I and when I was in surgery for my colon cancer he went down to see them, got them to make it so everything is left to him with the promise to " Take care" of me. I was getting half before this. He used my mental and physical health problems to get them to remove me because he didn't want issues with the court should I pass away before him. I don't see or hear anything, I'm not a crazy person. I am just as normal as anyone else except I have been through some very bad trauma in my earlier life resulting in my mental issues. My finances are fine I owe no one except for medical bill's and I own my home and I don't use illegal drug's nor am I addicted to any substance period. People with mental issues are easy targets for greedy people and I know that my last years are going to be spent in a court room trying to get back what was mine. What I SORELY Deserved.
It is easy to fall through the cracks of the system. Family support can be limited. My family pays for my meds. But the most effective thing is cognitive therapy for me. Major Depression and anxiety and a sight impairment .I haven't seen anyone work with a patient who has both you rather get mental health services or services for the blind
My conditions synergize. Try that one folks. Suggestions?
Have you got any information on narcissistic abuse or psychopathy, psychopaths and sociopaths the ones who cause most of our problems? The ones who are allowed to walk free when psychiatrists deny all our abuse!?
"their family was concerned" what happens when there is no family
HIPPA has destroyed my family and my life. My wife (now my X) refuses help for her bazaar mental illness and I can’t help her without her PERMISSION!!😢
what loved one? you mean the person you ignored? that one that's screaming why don't you love me? why don't you care? your more conserned about how I look in public with you that my heart or soul? the one that went crying to their room months ago and you only now noticed?
Exactly me as well.
Hope you are well
So true... There are reasons for someone to get mentally ill and toxic social contacts are mostly a big part of it.
My family refused to acknowledge I am mentally ill as it would destroy their head canon of the family name and tried to hurt me out of it lol so I have to find help alone
duh see how it is see how you say they feel worthless? humans need love this is a scientific fact
He described my son to a T. He feel hopeless, nobody will help us
My mom has schizophrenia. I would wake up as a little girl and she would stare at me and say I’m not her daughter etc. I don’t know how to help because she doesn’t want to speak to a therapist etc. My brother was living with her and he was bipolar. Unfortunately, he committed suicide and I believe trying to care for her and himself was too much for him. 😢
How is someone able to support a parent with mental illness while making their mental health a priority.
well my familys killing me and i dono what to do. i feel like if i leave them and never come back theyll be destroyed but if i stay im getting destroyed. and suicides not an option.
I think deppresion made me stronger
HIPPA is a stranglehold: killed the iconic family doctor. My advocacy fo my ailing loved one goes endlessly unheard. Doctors are a box-n-ship lot.
For most of some them it,s a business prescribing the meds .
I think hippa law needs amending.
I became a nurse before HIPPA and it's a crock of baloney- who wants to stop family from helping anyone in medical treatment? Why have they made the law?
True and the family suffers most if there is a mental patient. Medical business is making things complicated and they are behind such laws.
Going through this 2017 I feel done. Not much support where I live.
How to tell my wife's family that this is happening to my wife there sister, we became homless a part is both of outs depression,they fight a scream and yell her ,they don't understand and my wife brought up for the first time in our long life ,GIVING !!!! HELP !!!
I am from India ,I have 2 mentally ill people my sister and a mother ,I gave them medicine from past 5 years but there is no sign of improvement .
Sometimes I get frustrated from them now I think I have no option to just berdsht them
Where was this two months ago. My husband is in jail now. Things got so bad. Now he’s looking at time I believe. I had to make sure my daughter and I were safe. It’s really sad.
My brother has an undiagnosed severe mental illness - something along the lines of schizophrenia. He is enabled by my father, though, so I don't see him getting help. I am scared what will happen when my father is gone.
step in bro, try to speak to your father and explain how u feel.. not to be intrusive. i wish u the best
I struggled for a long time with my mother in the a very similar way. You should seek help from any reliable health care source, and be persistent. Do not isolate yourself, you must take time for self care!! so important. Find community in the channel I have created for the loved ones and care takers of the mentally imbalanced. You are not alone, there is hope!
Bobo411 my brother is diagnosed but has been off meds for almost eighteen months and two bad beatings, kickings and chokings one which resulted in my receiving a very mild concussion
Hello Bobo . I am Mabel from Cameroon but I live in cologne Germany. My husband is suffering with something similar to your brothers case. His mother enaes him big time. I am really afraid for him when she's gone too.
I am going through the same exact situation :(
My daughter has the same issue as Giancarlo. I have not been able to beat Hippa law. I feel laws are made not in favor of mentally ill people. Dr.Ted Hippa Laws need to be reformed for the Mentally ill. We have stopped living a long time ago.
I isolated myself I lived with my husband and my family I didn't understand health issues I was having...after seeing a specialist I was told I've had anemia for 5 years and my doctors didn't tell me! I wasn't eating good for 4 years so I was very tired and could barely fuction I bacame a daily user of meth to get my day going keep me awake so my family never supported me emotionally, financially, spiritually so when they told me right before I went in for surgery That I had to move out they wanted nothing to do with me because I was smoking meth!!
This was January 2019 its June 2019 and Im homeless trying to heal and gain my health sonI can live......family is not important to me but my health my mental health is
God bless all homeless as this world has no meaning in such case..😭😭😭...Hope pray to c better Real world will be after Death
Can u please help me to help my boyfriend out of the blue he started acting different saying he hears people and their watching him I been with him for years and never seen this before I'm scared I don't know what he will do next he's so afraid of what's around him nd he was so brave at first always wanting to protect others , always keeping up with his hygiene and looks now he seems not to care like he wants to be cannot , how could this happen out the blue and so suddenly?? I just don't understand I want to help so bad his mother just ignores it and doesn't say anything I can't sleep my stomach hurts because I'm so worried about him ...who do I go to for him? Who do I take him to talk to? Please help me he's 27 years old never showed any signs of mental illness but I see something is way off and I can tell he just keeps trying to make me feel like he's ok but I know he's not I can't function without knowing he's not ok I need someones help I need to know how to talk to him I feel so bad I hope I didn't do anything to make this happen.. we wasn't even aguring or anything when this happened we were very fine just relaxing , he used to hug and love me so much now he feels so far away and my heart is hurt so much it's breaking into pieces...😢😢😢😢😭😭😭😭
Therapists just call it "complaining" when one talks about what they see their spouse doing. It's a sad situation when a loved one is trying to get help in living with an un-diagnosed mentally ill person. Therapists can not help these people, they are simple minded people, in most situations. Journaling what you see if pertinent, and will save your own life.
Complaining never works. I agree. Actions speak louder than words.
@@kj-my7se Actually, what I meant was that; when first dealing with mental illness and not knowing at all what is going on, all you can do is share the problems that you see, which can be called "complaining", but it takes a skilled therapist to see the situation and actually help. some just want to teach communication skills, thinking that is the problem. That doesn't do anything when dealing with a mentally ill person.
Listening and leverage both didn't work and my brother just refuses to go see a counselor. What do we do?
what do you mean when you say bend the rules?
Please open this video for contribution. I´d love to translate it to portuguese.
I started flaking out 13.. sigh.
"Mind your own business..." Nietzsche
Don't lose sight of the purpose of life... you don't need to study... you don't need a job... you don't need a home... what we do need is quality of life...🥳🥳
In my case when mental illness enters and there is no family no one
Chris Kokolios i’m so sorry i know what it’s like
True..Practically no doctor cud cure yet...I did frm multiple top doctors,Im much hopeless waiting for death only😞😭😭😭😭😭
Yeah.
A lot of people get along with everyone except thier parents, and thier parents set requirements with which siblings spend time with which siblings. Some irresponsible elderly parents live with even thier even elderly parents, and impose thier will upon an entire family community, so thier kids cant even be a part of thier extended family anymore. Holy...thats quite the thing. This has to do with financial problems and mental illness primarily, and in this case, many need to look for even more distant relatives in order to stay healthy. Its that bad its kind of like a whole mentally ill community. This goes on in the US and is hidden by social engineering methods for reasearch purposes and is part of the fall of society happening. I have personal experience.
I need help.
How about a talk on when families create mental illness?
The NAMI idea is a nice fairy tale.
Request all to help me...im suffering through this v severely..did much medications but 0 recovery.... is there any angel to truly help...??😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. have no one to lookafter... finding no way
@J ... Thanx. But i know that no one will come to save me.... Can u call,take me in ur country??😞😭😭😭
@J .Thanks... Can u plzzz take me away ,i ll be recovered soon?? Help😭😭😭😭
@J ...😭😭
What were their mother’s pregnancies like?
I want to connect with family who have some loved one suffering from mental illness. The idea is to share experience of dealing with the problem to lessen the suffering. Reply here and I'll provide detail to connect. Thanks.
I don't think that's right Noone can deal with someone have a mental illness because they will always tryes to make troubles and problems from nothing and after that they will start hitting their heads on the wall and yelling and crying instead of apologize very often no one can handle that because we as human have a limits to everything and also it depends how much the other person's mental illness
Leverage lovely leverage
Do: use it to encourage behaviours rooted in treating the cause of the affect.
Don’t: use leverage to get those mentally ill to better complete tasks that are symptomatically not improving at a pace you’re happy with due to illness despite the person struggling actively working towards recovery.
If the cause is depression and the affect is a messy room using leverage over the messy room is useless. Leverage over going to therapy appointments and follow ups with psychiatrist? Yeah go ahead.
None of this:
“Oh when you came home from therapy you didn’t do the dishes until 10pm and you napped for two hours when you got home. If this continues you’re out”
Cuz the latter is what my parents did and let me tell you-not helpful.
I'm not alone i think...
My parents has mental health issues they start shouting on small small things... They doesn't even know how to respect our grandparents as well... They're completely mental... They're so selfish..
see how you talk about the money? the woman is saying screw the money what about me? don't you love me? don't even care im sick? or am I just a money machine to you? why don't you do something about the money? im nothing to you that you care more about that than me
Hipia doesnt make it easy
First guy was prolly just getting stoned and gaming lololol
What about John whose main family members are all schizophrenic?
Hey Coletha, I come from schizophrenic parents, and I have created a new channel in support of loved ones and care takers where they can find community, strength and compassion. Please check it out, there is hope.
The Glass House Project Are you schizophrenic?
I am not. Do you live with schizophrenia?
Or thoughts are not moral.
My oh, my. This is why I'm here... trying to find help for the most destructive force in the last five years for many people in the eastern USA. She COMPLETELY DESTROYED HER FORMER CHURCH. Look up "Donny Reagan, most racist pastor in America" and you'll see. She was the one who did this. Her mental illness destroyed her family starting a LONG time ago. She loved to gossip about very severe things and make HUGE false accusations against others in the family, for attention. When a huge string of imagined crimes began to be spun against an uncle, it destroyed that uncle's life. He even received death threats from the public and from law enforcement. The whole while, the sick niece was eating up the attention, adding to, changing, heightening the story every day with the help of cell phone and social media.
This wasn't enough. After county and state investigations cleared the uncle of any wrongdoing. Her extreme ways called her to further action, so since 2011 she has slandered that uncle with ridiculously inflamed lies and false accusations.
She married an abuser before that, who cheated on her with his brother's young teenage wife. They fought for two years about this. She found out in October 2010, and made everyone's life a living hell. One evening two years later, during a physical fight with her husband, she tried to kill him. there was a lot of blood, according to her mother.
They divorced. Her father-in-law tried to get custody of her three kids. She used a similar tactic again for control, attention and selfish motives against her father-in-law that she used against her uncle. She falsely accused him of anally raping one of her three sons. She ended up homeless with three sons, while being extremely mentally ill.
A black bodybuilder, martial artist and physical trainer in Springfield, Ohio took her in, out of pity. She took that to mean she was going to get married to the man. This was when she scoured through the online library of preached messages by Donny Reagan and found a 17 minute clip that she sent to Gawker and other anti-God gossip sites... causing international uproar about Rev. Reagan.
She gloated on social media over having been responsible for the so-called exposure of Donny Reagan as being a racist. She ramped up her defamation attack on her uncle, meanwhile.
The black bodybuilder saw the error of his ways and politely kicked the woman out. She says she became an atheist, but she really became a raving mad antichrist. She traveled the country a bit, still homeless, going from home to home with other people until they saw the error of their ways, also politely kicking out this dangerous psychopath.
She began making really odd comments online, saying, "The beast of the Message (Reagan's religion) has been wounded, together we can finish it off." and, "It's perfectly normal for my boys to watch porn. Sexuality is natural."
She met a guy who was also an atheist, who, was claimed homelessness at that time, though he's some kind of professor at a university. She quickly changed her name on the internet to hyphenate and add his name at the end. He also fronts a death metal band called, strangely enough, "Dark Psychotica." He had no idea what he had attracted to himself.
They took advantage of a program that got her (and him) a home, at least, thankfully getting those three preschool boys off the street.
She got a job, and worked it for about a year. She hatched a plan for easy money, seeing how lying about others has gotten her much attention in the past. She was also always claiming, for sympathy, this disease or that disease, and most recently, cancer.
She claimed sexual harassment at work, and broke down in tests in front of her therapist. She got more than she bargained for and she was involuntarily locked up in a mental ward.
Her boyfriend started a GoFundMe account in December 2015 to gather money for the kids Christmas and to keep them from becoming homeless again.
Never know, but I can guess that if the EEOC or the Virginia state version of that gets a claim for sexual harassment at the workplace causing severe emotional distress, that if they do some digging and see the calculated pattern of lying of this woman, she will be charged with a crime, as well as losing her children for good this time.
Criminal acts under the cover of mental illness don't get treated the same, and she knows it. So, she plays sane when it benefits her and she plays insane when it benefits her.
She is a tornado to everyone who knows her.
What can be done?
It's not good to keep everything all bottled up. It also prevents actual confrontation.
CEOs talk to themselves in the mirror to promote there mental strength when morality is low
Investigate, do tests, analytics, whatever, but do not stay with what the doctors say, they only limit themselves to saying that it is for life and they give antipsychotics ... Give yourself the opportunity to improve and heal as much as possible? Why settle for what the white coats say? are they gods?
This guy sound exactly like Bukowski