I totally agree that the “just you wait” is so negative. I wish I had heard more of “cherish this moment because it goes so fast and you can’t get time back”
Im a postpartum nurse and I hear all the things ALL THE TIME now that im very pregnant. thats why Im starting my disability leave ASAP so I can be in my own mental bubble before delivery
I somewhat feel the opposite. Or see it from both sides. Every experience is unique but I did have a REAALLY crazy, tough time with my 1st born & I desperately wished I connected more w/ moms who didn’t particularly “enjoy” those first years of momhood. So yes, expressing all of the wonderful things that can come with becoming a parent is important, but also sharing the real, raw, TOUGH times is just as important. I hated hearing comments like “enjoy these moments” bc I couldn’t relate… & thats okay too. Fast forward my son is almost 4 & it took a 3 yr rollercoaster for all of us to learn & enjoy the ride. I also have an almost 2 yr old girl, & she was the complete opposite of my first. I got to experience the lovely newborn experience w/ her that I was always so envious to experience. Validating every experience positive or negative is important 🙏🏻
Yesssss sis. I love hearing you talk about how amazing pregnancy and motherhood are. I am so sick of hearing all of the negative comments about children ! They are the most wonderful blessing from our heavenly Father. Enjoy your sweet baby girl.
Carrie, thank you so so SO much for sharing this advice. I'm 5 months pregnant, and this video has been more helpful than MOST of the advice I've heard personally. There's something so pertinent about your words, since you're currently in the season you're advising on. You're a gift! ❤ ❤
Just you wait.. your child will grow up to be so unique and amazing and nothing and everything you ever dreamed of! I've got two (1 and 4), and they are the most interesting and wonderful people I've ever known. My whole life changed, but in such fulfilling ways. I am not even that positive of a person, but these two littles make my life so much brighter. ❤
As a boomer i slso have noticed the negative tendency, and consciously try to only share positive stuff. We all go through rough periods but there is so mmany beautiful magical moments to focus on
I just found out this week that I am pregnant with my first baby! We have been hoping and praying for a little one for months so I am so excited. I have been watching all of your videos but I am so happy I can finally apply the advice 😊 lovely video as always ❤
Your videos are so beautiful and always leave me lighter then when I came! So thankful for you and the wisdom you share through your story and experiences!
I think it’s important to add that labor and delivery look different for everyone! For some people, the labor process is slow, but for others it’s so much different. I’ve heard from a lot of people that, like you, the water breaking is a trickle and the labor process is often slow. However in my case, for example, my water broke…violently with hemorrhage and I was rushed to the hospital by ambulance. I had no warning. No contractions. Nothing. Rushed into the OR before I even had time to process what was happening. I just remember the extreme fear I felt on the quick drive to the hospital, the same hospital that I work in every day, just terrified that baby was not ok. Thankfully, my little girl was delivered safely but it certainly does not erase the trauma that was endured to get there. I hope those who have also gone through a rough labor and delivery can resonate, and for those who have yet to get there- expect the unexpected and know that you’re never alone ❤
I love all your mama-related content! I experienced a miscarriage myself in January and can really relate. In those first 12 weeks so much unsolicited advice was given to me, and it was all negative and about traumatic birth stories! It is so interesting that people think it is okay to push their own trauma and fear onto a newly pregnant woman! Instead of filling her with positivity, support, hope, and excitement. I hope the narrative changes really soon. I'm really looking forward to hearing your journey to conceiving your rainbow baby.
Carrie, as a mom of a 17 girl, 14 girl, 12 boy, and yes we started over unexpectedly 2 year old girl and currently prego with another baby due in June. While some of the information is repetitive its still very good to rehear and very informative! Thanks for your information as you said every baby is different every pregnancy is different! Just you wait yes there will be trials but also lost of fun! Sorry for people to be negative, you keep doing what you are doing! God bless you and your family ❤
Loved this video, motherhood suits you very much. My husband and I are on our TTC journey since September last year. I sadly suffered an ectopic pregnancy and surgery over Christmas last year. I am longing to hold my own sweet baby in my arms. My heart is breaking a little bit every time my period comes.
Aww I love this video soo much! Such a beautiful perspective on each persons unique & sacred journey. I remember when I was super pregnant & was so soo over the negative unsolicited advice people would throw my way - I found myself kind of avoiding conversation when I would go out because I just needed to protect my inner peace at that point. There was this one women in line at a store & talking to her became inevitable. She started asking me a few questions & we continued chatting. Then her teenage daughter came over to join her in line & the women beamed & said! "Just you wait! One day they will grow up & you will love them more than anything!" & she hugged her daughter & it was just the best moment ever. When we parted ways she said "don't worry about a thing, it's all going to be so perfect. You're about the have the time of your life." & I will NEVER forget her!! She made my day a thousand times over.
100% the negativity around motherhood and parenthood is so out of control and so terrifying. I have always wanted to be a mum ever since I was a child myself but the negativity that’s out there has even had me questioning if I could do it or if I is even worth it. So this was nice to hear your perspective ❤
So many women and even men are trying to like put negative thoughts in my head but i started getting so annoyed and just learned how to ignore them. I honestly feel sorry for them now. One friend of mine even said I may hate my baby (I guess she did) that right there made me immediately stop talking to her about my pregnancy. I did have a problem where I was being too hard on my fiance. I was getting angry at him for too many things that shouldn't be such a big deal and I actually told myself that I need to relax and just love him. Which has made this whole experience better. I struggled with constipation so bad during my first trimester. I couldn't fart, burp or poo and it would cause pain and nausea and had to call out of work a bunch of times because I just couldn't move like i wanted. Once I started taking magnesium, my insides started working so much better and I had so much energy back. The constipation is no fun but try magnesium if you can.
Oh great video Carrie! So accurate. I haaaated it when people would say “just you wait till you’re pregnant AND you have another child to look after”. Like it made me feel bad I had even said I was tired ! Just had my second and yes I was veeeery tired being pregnant and looking after a toddler but I absolutely did not need to hear that the first time. Pregnancy tired is non joke. Thanks for sharing this ❤
I'm childfree by choice but still loved this video!💙 I'm a therapist so I loved learning more about what it's like to be a mother! Also I've been following you and Alex for 10 years and am just over the moon excited for you both! You two are so great together and I know the Elliana will be so loved! Post-partum cart? What a great idea and so YOU lol. Also just want to say-LOVE how you're pointing out all the negativity and trying to switch that narrative about the "just you waits" to a more positive, yet realistic narrative. 💙 Last thing- YAY for Soul sugar coming back!!!!
I so appreciate your channel in all its evolutions! Been watching since your Silverlake days! I now live in NZ too and love watching your journey, thanks for sharing!
The only advice I ever give anyone is no matter what how you feel you are not alone, and you are not a bad mama. Find that special honest mum to talk to if you need to. Parenthood is hard, it should be, it's important, but so worth every single minute when you see your kids as they grow
Oh yes to the stool softener. I didn't know about that kind of issue and was blindsided by it! Everyone needs to do them and not worry about what people say. Each to their own and absolutely stop Googling!!! It is a slippery path of anxiousness that just isn't necessary to add to the mix of pregnancy!
I got maternity photos even though I didn't know if I'd totally need them, but my daughter is 10 months now and loves looking at them and hearing about how she was in mom's belly :)
Following along your journey gives me so much hope. In the thick of infertility can make it seem like this reality will never happen for us. Fingers crossed it does. Thanks for being so candid with your story. (Would love if you did a video eventually about your own struggles to get and stay pregnant. I know you mentioned it’s coming in this video, but it would be helpful for people in the thick of miscarriages and infertility like me! So I’m looking forward to that). Sending love to your family 🥰
Nothing stays the same.. this is a mindset I had that really helped and in hindsight it is so true. You are in season that will change. I know it’s so hard, maybe the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. You will be on the other side of it one day though. I’m sending you so much love. ❤️
Same !! Hiiii Carrie! I’ve loved you for so long! So fun watching this next chapter and learning while you’re a chapter ahead in life. Thanks so much for sharing your positive radiant energy!!!
Hi Carrie! I have been your follower since the beginning, and I am so happy for you congratulations 🥰 I plan on having kids in the future, and I am terrified bc of the way ppl talk about it, and I wanna say that you are such a light. And I am so grateful that you are changing the language on this topic, thank you ❤
It's so great to shed some light on these things, as someone who hopes to conceive this year, this gives me a new perspective on what people say and what the reality is, so thank you! You are adorable, btw! :D
I swear that I slept super good in the third trimester because I regularly went to the chiropractor! I went to the chiropractor as often as I went to the OB, at his recommendation. It completely fixed my sciatica and I only woke up for the many night pee trips.
I feel just the opposite. I feel like most influencers like to present parenthood from a positive angle which is great, I'm also all about positive mindset. But having had harder times with my little one I have noticed that there are not a lot of places to ask help from or get advice from and that makes women feel like they are failing. So I'm not into "only positive" or "only negative" angles on motherhood because it has both sides. And I know I did not want to hear all those "just you wait" comments as a new mom. But having a 16 month old I kind of have to admit to myself that most of those "just you waits" were actually true. I just chose not to listen to them. Although I agree that all babies are different and for that reason I won't say these things to anyone. Best wishes to your lovely family, you are doing great!
Thank you Carrie for putting this out there for future parents to be! Incredibly valuable information. I agree with all your points! My perfect angel Clare is turning 9 months in 3 days! 💘
I loved this video! My baby is almost 8 months. I cherish every moment of it, I feel my baby grew so quick. I would say also yes to the pregnancy & newborn photo shoot. Also hire a doula and a IBCLC if you can. Don’t google and march to the beat of your own drum. Go with the flow and enjoy this wonderful ride.
I had miscarried at 11 weeks and I had no idea how common it was. I was devastated. We now have a beautiful almost 4 month old baby girl. And I must agree every pregnancy is different. My first pregnancy with my son was so different than my daughter even my delivery experience. 😊
Oh and take newborn photos!!! I regret not doing a newborn shoot for my son so I made sure to do it for my new daughter. We also did a family pregnancy shoot before she arrived so we could capture memories and moments as a family of three before we became a family of four (plus our dog!)
As someone who does not want kids, I feel the opposite regarding the negatives comments about kids, I feel like everyone is obsessed with babies and women having children-it's always, "when are you having children??" I don't get why there is so much pressure for women to have children and why people are so obsessed wtih babies. I wish there was more support for those of us who do not want kids.
I agree there are definitely societal pressures to have children, but there are more and more women/couples choosing not to. My daughter and my son-in-law have chosen not to and I am OK with their decision because it is theirs's to make, not mine. I have felt like some people think I'm odd that I'm Ok with it and think I should really try to convince them to reconsider. It's to the point that I dread when people ask, " Any grandchildren yet"? Sometimes I tell people I have a grandbird ( my kids have a Caique Parrot) and he's beautiful. LOL
It is more common than ever for couples/people deciding not to have kids and it is accepted readily around all who I know. The world will never give up its obsession with babies and nor should it have to. Celebrating one thing doesn't mean your personal choice isn't valid or needs validation. There is room for all decisions and whether you like it or not, babies herald all that is right, positive and hopeful for this world we live in. This does not diminish your choice to not have one. We all just need to do us and let the rest be whoever they wish to be.
Also asking the question 'when/or are you having children' isn't a pressure. It's just a question and not meant to hurt you or make you feel bad. It is tiring being PC all the time and remembering what is and isn't going to perhaps, just maybe, make someone feel uncomfortable or 'lesser than'. Smiling, saying parenthood isn't for you, and moving swiftly on is great. Then no one gets to feel uncomfortable or maligned.
@@fionahislop2889 The thing is that it is a very very personal question with a very personal answer. People sometimes throw it around as casual talk. They only expect 1 answer. And their reaction can sting. Even if I am able to act cool and casual. I still have to deal with the shocked expression on their faces or their comments. You can ask the question in certain situations. Like in a private situation where you discuss the subject further. But it isn't something you just throw around. That has nothing to do with having to walk on ice or not being able to say anything. That is just respect and consideration towards others.
Loved the bit about „just you wait comments”. Not once someone told me about some nice positive thing to wait for but everyone remembered to remind me how tough it is going to be, I thing this is so sad 😢 obviously parenthood is hard but why focus on the negativity, especially when it’s just a quick comment like that
I appreciate your content sooooo much! I'm due mid June with our first baby after 4 years of infertility. Love watching all your new mom content it makes me extra excited to meet my little girl 💗
My water broke before contractions too but it was a GUSH! That was around 8pm and baby was born around 3pm the next day. Such a wild and beautiful experience!
Those days when I was pregnant and very exhausted/tired people would ask " why so tired?" I was like " cause I'm a growing a human and you aren't." Just a gentle reminder that I was pregnant because I didn't really look like I was. And the google thing yeah your right. Dont do that. My grandma had 2 miscarriages and my mom had one before my little brother. My did say that to me as well. She said " as much as it hurts they do happen but your gonna have the baby you want to love."
Yeah I didnt know contractions would be delayed after your water broke, I always thought it would come straight after, my water broke around 4 in the morning, at first I thought 'omg I pissed the bed' but then I clicked, 'its my water', I was 4 days early for my first child, hence why I thought I pissed myself cause everyone kept telling me "youll be late", "first babies always come late", im also a virgo, so I was very pleased she came early. I didnt start contractions till late at night, around 9pm. In the end because she was in my womb for a long time I had to stay in hospital for 5 days so they could monitor her, they're was a risk of infection. Anyways shout out to Christchurch Hospital, I had an amazing birth. Thank-you Carrie for sharing🥰
I live in Alaska and work in a maternity clinic as a nurse. Our primary goal for our mothers is to combat the negative self and societal talk that women always seem to hear. We hate the “just you wait comments” and encourage moms to live fully in all of the feelings they experience.
I think all the negative “just you wait” stuff is a reaction to the not-so-distance past where women essentially felt tricked into motherhood as this glorious fulfilment of their purpose and without any understanding of some of the harder realities. In an effort to correct this, we’ve possibly swung too much the other way into demonising the whole experience. Like anything in life, it will come with its highs and its lows.
i never really realized how common miscarriages were until i became a postpartum nurse. Id say more than 80% of my patients have had at least one miscarriage. Having experienced one of my own, that knowledge doesnt make it less painful but it at least gave me hope that I would conceive a healthy child one day and I have! just like most women do
I particularly hated the "wait till you toilet train". My older daughter was born with a developmental disability and did not fully bowel train till she was 5. The comments and "advice" from people was brutal at times. If you don't have anything good to say, then say nothing. This was a good topic and hopefully helpful for new moms.
Be careful telling viewers certain things. After my water broke my baby was born within 5 hours. I barely had time to get to the hospital and almost didn’t get my epidural. Just because your experience was a certain way doesn’t mean that’s the way it is.
Just wanna say HI CARRIE I’m part of your Instagram chatroom and saw you’re replying sooooo EEEP HIIIIII. SOOOOO excited for a new video! Yall are rockstars. 🩷
Carrie, IndiaBatson UA-camr needs some of your love & vote of confidence….having lost two babies…. FYI….so happy for your loving family! U are blessed. Ciao for now, Vita Maria from California
@@CarrieRad I'm not sure. I guess every birth is different and I ran out of adrenaline. My milk supply didn't come in and then when it did a week later it was barely enough to feed him. We supplemented with formula the first 8 weeks and then finally built up a supply so we breastfed only between 8 weeks and 6 months when he started solids. Still sorta breastfeeding now at 1.5 years so totally worth triple feeding earlier on.
I had terrible morning, noon and night sickness ,but after 6 weeks I ate anything that didn't get up off the plate and run, LOL. Gained 43 lbs and was ravenous for food. Not junk food either. I ate good foods. My daughter was 8lb 8oz.
I never say the “just you wait” but I do think it. Ecsp when you have a friend who thinks she can still party as a new mother and pass her kid off on everyone and anyone. Saying things like “You guys knew I didn’t want kids!!! Why didn’t you stop me?” 😂😂Whattttt
As a mom of a toddler who is struggling with this phase I found some of this to be tone deaf in line with the toxic positivity I see around motherhood struggles. For some of us in the thick of a challenging time hearing this ‘look for the rainbow’ perspective to be invalidating and totally off putting
I got really sad when she said take the maternity photos cuz i didnt. And im fully committed to never getting pregnant again. Also do a stupid gender reveal. Its just son fun. I didnt do that either
I feel this because i wish we did something more fun for our gender reveal but we kept it super casual, there's something special about that too though!
Carrie that was interesting. Remember, women have the greatest gift of giving life. Your now prepared for the 9 other babies to follow. Just joking. What did surprise me was what involvement your husband had in pregnancy.
I totally agree that the “just you wait” is so negative. I wish I had heard more of “cherish this moment because it goes so fast and you can’t get time back”
Completely agree.
Im a postpartum nurse and I hear all the things ALL THE TIME now that im very pregnant. thats why Im starting my disability leave ASAP so I can be in my own mental bubble before delivery
I somewhat feel the opposite. Or see it from both sides. Every experience is unique but I did have a REAALLY crazy, tough time with my 1st born & I desperately wished I connected more w/ moms who didn’t particularly “enjoy” those first years of momhood. So yes, expressing all of the wonderful things that can come with becoming a parent is important, but also sharing the real, raw, TOUGH times is just as important. I hated hearing comments like “enjoy these moments” bc I couldn’t relate… & thats okay too.
Fast forward my son is almost 4 & it took a 3 yr rollercoaster for all of us to learn & enjoy the ride. I also have an almost 2 yr old girl, & she was the complete opposite of my first. I got to experience the lovely newborn experience w/ her that I was always so envious to experience.
Validating every experience positive or negative is important 🙏🏻
This!
Yesssss sis. I love hearing you talk about how amazing pregnancy and motherhood are. I am so sick of hearing all of the negative comments about children ! They are the most wonderful blessing from our heavenly Father. Enjoy your sweet baby girl.
Carrie, thank you so so SO much for sharing this advice. I'm 5 months pregnant, and this video has been more helpful than MOST of the advice I've heard personally. There's something so pertinent about your words, since you're currently in the season you're advising on. You're a gift! ❤ ❤
Just you wait.. your child will grow up to be so unique and amazing and nothing and everything you ever dreamed of! I've got two (1 and 4), and they are the most interesting and wonderful people I've ever known.
My whole life changed, but in such fulfilling ways. I am not even that positive of a person, but these two littles make my life so much brighter. ❤
That’s what I look forward to the most, getting to know who this person is and nurturing their interests ❤
As a boomer i slso have noticed the negative tendency, and consciously try to only share positive stuff. We all go through rough periods but there is so mmany beautiful magical moments to focus on
I love that!! Thanks for doing that Eileen. I know it’s so helpful. 🤍
I just found out this week that I am pregnant with my first baby! We have been hoping and praying for a little one for months so I am so excited. I have been watching all of your videos but I am so happy I can finally apply the advice 😊 lovely video as always ❤
As a new time mom, I am so much loving the co sleeping journey w my baby. I will cherish this time forever, regardless of the sleepless nights.
It’s such a special time 💕
Your videos are so beautiful and always leave me lighter then when I came! So thankful for you and the wisdom you share through your story and experiences!
Aw thank you! That makes me so happy to hear. xx
I think it’s important to add that labor and delivery look different for everyone! For some people, the labor process is slow, but for others it’s so much different. I’ve heard from a lot of people that, like you, the water breaking is a trickle and the labor process is often slow. However in my case, for example, my water broke…violently with hemorrhage and I was rushed to the hospital by ambulance. I had no warning. No contractions. Nothing. Rushed into the OR before I even had time to process what was happening. I just remember the extreme fear I felt on the quick drive to the hospital, the same hospital that I work in every day, just terrified that baby was not ok. Thankfully, my little girl was delivered safely but it certainly does not erase the trauma that was endured to get there. I hope those who have also gone through a rough labor and delivery can resonate, and for those who have yet to get there- expect the unexpected and know that you’re never alone ❤
I love all your mama-related content! I experienced a miscarriage myself in January and can really relate. In those first 12 weeks so much unsolicited advice was given to me, and it was all negative and about traumatic birth stories! It is so interesting that people think it is okay to push their own trauma and fear onto a newly pregnant woman! Instead of filling her with positivity, support, hope, and excitement. I hope the narrative changes really soon. I'm really looking forward to hearing your journey to conceiving your rainbow baby.
Carrie, as a mom of a 17 girl, 14 girl, 12 boy, and yes we started over unexpectedly 2 year old girl and currently prego with another baby due in June. While some of the information is repetitive its still very good to rehear and very informative! Thanks for your information as you said every baby is different every pregnancy is different! Just you wait yes there will be trials but also lost of fun! Sorry for people to be negative, you keep doing what you are doing! God bless you and your family ❤
Thank you so much for this! Sharing all of your honest “big sis” talk is very calming and reassuring!
Loved this video, motherhood suits you very much. My husband and I are on our TTC journey since September last year. I sadly suffered an ectopic pregnancy and surgery over Christmas last year. I am longing to hold my own sweet baby in my arms. My heart is breaking a little bit every time my period comes.
The “just wait” positives are what I heard another mom say before and I always remember that when I meet a mom to be ❤
Aww I love this video soo much! Such a beautiful perspective on each persons unique & sacred journey. I remember when I was super pregnant & was so soo over the negative unsolicited advice people would throw my way - I found myself kind of avoiding conversation when I would go out because I just needed to protect my inner peace at that point. There was this one women in line at a store & talking to her became inevitable. She started asking me a few questions & we continued chatting. Then her teenage daughter came over to join her in line & the women beamed & said! "Just you wait! One day they will grow up & you will love them more than anything!" & she hugged her daughter & it was just the best moment ever. When we parted ways she said "don't worry about a thing, it's all going to be so perfect. You're about the have the time of your life." & I will NEVER forget her!! She made my day a thousand times over.
100% the negativity around motherhood and parenthood is so out of control and so terrifying. I have always wanted to be a mum ever since I was a child myself but the negativity that’s out there has even had me questioning if I could do it or if I is even worth it. So this was nice to hear your perspective ❤
So many women and even men are trying to like put negative thoughts in my head but i started getting so annoyed and just learned how to ignore them. I honestly feel sorry for them now. One friend of mine even said I may hate my baby (I guess she did) that right there made me immediately stop talking to her about my pregnancy. I did have a problem where I was being too hard on my fiance. I was getting angry at him for too many things that shouldn't be such a big deal and I actually told myself that I need to relax and just love him. Which has made this whole experience better.
I struggled with constipation so bad during my first trimester. I couldn't fart, burp or poo and it would cause pain and nausea and had to call out of work a bunch of times because I just couldn't move like i wanted. Once I started taking magnesium, my insides started working so much better and I had so much energy back. The constipation is no fun but try magnesium if you can.
Oh great video Carrie! So accurate. I haaaated it when people would say “just you wait till you’re pregnant AND you have another child to look after”. Like it made me feel bad I had even said I was tired ! Just had my second and yes I was veeeery tired being pregnant and looking after a toddler but I absolutely did not need to hear that the first time. Pregnancy tired is non joke. Thanks for sharing this ❤
My first and only pregnancy was identical twins. I loved to comments from people with one baby. You learn as you go. And you do you
I'm childfree by choice but still loved this video!💙 I'm a therapist so I loved learning more about what it's like to be a mother! Also I've been following you and Alex for 10 years and am just over the moon excited for you both! You two are so great together and I know the Elliana will be so loved! Post-partum cart? What a great idea and so YOU lol. Also just want to say-LOVE how you're pointing out all the negativity and trying to switch that narrative about the "just you waits" to a more positive, yet realistic narrative. 💙 Last thing- YAY for Soul sugar coming back!!!!
A video on how you prepped for your postpartum experience (ie. What you included in the cart!) would be so helpful as a first time mom!
I so appreciate your channel in all its evolutions! Been watching since your Silverlake days! I now live in NZ too and love watching your journey, thanks for sharing!
The only advice I ever give anyone is no matter what how you feel you are not alone, and you are not a bad mama. Find that special honest mum to talk to if you need to. Parenthood is hard, it should be, it's important, but so worth every single minute when you see your kids as they grow
Oh yes to the stool softener. I didn't know about that kind of issue and was blindsided by it!
Everyone needs to do them and not worry about what people say. Each to their own and absolutely stop Googling!!! It is a slippery path of anxiousness that just isn't necessary to add to the mix of pregnancy!
I got maternity photos even though I didn't know if I'd totally need them, but my daughter is 10 months now and loves looking at them and hearing about how she was in mom's belly :)
Love all of these so much! I'm 39 weeks pregnant today and can't wait to see her little face for the first time. Just you wait, indeed! xo
Following along your journey gives me so much hope. In the thick of infertility can make it seem like this reality will never happen for us. Fingers crossed it does. Thanks for being so candid with your story. (Would love if you did a video eventually about your own struggles to get and stay pregnant. I know you mentioned it’s coming in this video, but it would be helpful for people in the thick of miscarriages and infertility like me! So I’m looking forward to that). Sending love to your family 🥰
Nothing stays the same.. this is a mindset I had that really helped and in hindsight it is so true. You are in season that will change. I know it’s so hard, maybe the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. You will be on the other side of it one day though. I’m sending you so much love. ❤️
@@CarrieRad thank you for this ❤️
Same !! Hiiii Carrie! I’ve loved you for so long! So fun watching this next chapter and learning while you’re a chapter ahead in life. Thanks so much for sharing your positive radiant energy!!!
Aw thanks so much for following along this long! This is such a kind comment. 🥹
Hi Carrie! I have been your follower since the beginning, and I am so happy for you congratulations 🥰 I plan on having kids in the future, and I am terrified bc of the way ppl talk about it, and I wanna say that you are such a light. And I am so grateful that you are changing the language on this topic, thank you ❤
It's so great to shed some light on these things, as someone who hopes to conceive this year, this gives me a new perspective on what people say and what the reality is, so thank you! You are adorable, btw! :D
I swear that I slept super good in the third trimester because I regularly went to the chiropractor! I went to the chiropractor as often as I went to the OB, at his recommendation. It completely fixed my sciatica and I only woke up for the many night pee trips.
I feel just the opposite. I feel like most influencers like to present parenthood from a positive angle which is great, I'm also all about positive mindset. But having had harder times with my little one I have noticed that there are not a lot of places to ask help from or get advice from and that makes women feel like they are failing. So I'm not into "only positive" or "only negative" angles on motherhood because it has both sides.
And I know I did not want to hear all those "just you wait" comments as a new mom. But having a 16 month old I kind of have to admit to myself that most of those "just you waits" were actually true. I just chose not to listen to them. Although I agree that all babies are different and for that reason I won't say these things to anyone.
Best wishes to your lovely family, you are doing great!
I'm not a mom nor will I be or give birth for a long time, but I love watching these kinds of videos!
Thank you Carrie for putting this out there for future parents to be! Incredibly valuable information. I agree with all your points! My perfect angel Clare is turning 9 months in 3 days! 💘
I loved this video! My baby is almost 8 months. I cherish every moment of it, I feel my baby grew so quick. I would say also yes to the pregnancy & newborn photo shoot. Also hire a doula and a IBCLC if you can. Don’t google and march to the beat of your own drum. Go with the flow and enjoy this wonderful ride.
All of these truths are so important! Thank you so much for sharing what you've learned.
I had miscarried at 11 weeks and I had no idea how common it was. I was devastated. We now have a beautiful almost 4 month old baby girl. And I must agree every pregnancy is different. My first pregnancy with my son was so different than my daughter even my delivery experience. 😊
Oh and take newborn photos!!! I regret not doing a newborn shoot for my son so I made sure to do it for my new daughter. We also did a family pregnancy shoot before she arrived so we could capture memories and moments as a family of three before we became a family of four (plus our dog!)
As someone who does not want kids, I feel the opposite regarding the negatives comments about kids, I feel like everyone is obsessed with babies and women having children-it's always, "when are you having children??" I don't get why there is so much pressure for women to have children and why people are so obsessed wtih babies. I wish there was more support for those of us who do not want kids.
I agree there are definitely societal pressures to have children, but there are more and more women/couples choosing not to. My daughter and my son-in-law have chosen not to and I am OK with their decision because it is theirs's to make, not mine. I have felt like some people think I'm odd that I'm Ok with it and think I should really try to convince them to reconsider. It's to the point that I dread when people ask, " Any grandchildren yet"? Sometimes I tell people I have a grandbird ( my kids have a Caique Parrot) and he's beautiful. LOL
It is more common than ever for couples/people deciding not to have kids and it is accepted readily around all who I know. The world will never give up its obsession with babies and nor should it have to. Celebrating one thing doesn't mean your personal choice isn't valid or needs validation. There is room for all decisions and whether you like it or not, babies herald all that is right, positive and hopeful for this world we live in. This does not diminish your choice to not have one. We all just need to do us and let the rest be whoever they wish to be.
Also asking the question 'when/or are you having children' isn't a pressure. It's just a question and not meant to hurt you or make you feel bad. It is tiring being PC all the time and remembering what is and isn't going to perhaps, just maybe, make someone feel uncomfortable or 'lesser than'.
Smiling, saying parenthood isn't for you, and moving swiftly on is great. Then no one gets to feel uncomfortable or maligned.
@@fionahislop2889 The thing is that it is a very very personal question with a very personal answer. People sometimes throw it around as casual talk. They only expect 1 answer. And their reaction can sting.
Even if I am able to act cool and casual. I still have to deal with the shocked expression on their faces or their comments.
You can ask the question in certain situations. Like in a private situation where you discuss the subject further. But it isn't something you just throw around.
That has nothing to do with having to walk on ice or not being able to say anything. That is just respect and consideration towards others.
I know more than one woman who thought they were content with not having kids and later became very ready
Loved the bit about „just you wait comments”. Not once someone told me about some nice positive thing to wait for but everyone remembered to remind me how tough it is going to be, I thing this is so sad 😢 obviously parenthood is hard but why focus on the negativity, especially when it’s just a quick comment like that
You are such a strong women, I aspire to be like you! I have loved following you journey here in NZ and can’t wait to see more! Have a wonderful day ❤
Thank you so much for being here!
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Thank you so much, i AM pregant week 21 this is realy helpful 🥰
I appreciate your content sooooo much! I'm due mid June with our first baby after 4 years of infertility. Love watching all your new mom content it makes me extra excited to meet my little girl 💗
Thank you!!! And CONGRATS!! Ahh I’m so excited for you. 🥹💕
Such a helpful video - just found out I'm pregnant 4 weeks +6 💗
Aw yay! I’m so glad this is helpful. 🤍
Also, CONGRATS!!!!!
Kim you and I are basically the same! 😅 just found out I am pregnant with my first! I might be one day behind you lol
My water broke before contractions too but it was a GUSH! That was around 8pm and baby was born around 3pm the next day. Such a wild and beautiful experience!
Those days when I was pregnant and very exhausted/tired people would ask " why so tired?" I was like " cause I'm a growing a human and you aren't." Just a gentle reminder that I was pregnant because I didn't really look like I was. And the google thing yeah your right. Dont do that. My grandma had 2 miscarriages and my mom had one before my little brother. My did say that to me as well. She said " as much as it hurts they do happen but your gonna have the baby you want to love."
Aw that made me so emotional to hear what your mom said to you. That is a great mom. ❤️🩹
I loved this video so much ❤ my baby boy is 10 months old and I'm trying to cherish every moment
So glad you loved this video! Thank you for watching. And yes!! Get all those baby cuddles and kisses. ❤️
Yeah I didnt know contractions would be delayed after your water broke, I always thought it would come straight after, my water broke around 4 in the morning, at first I thought 'omg I pissed the bed' but then I clicked, 'its my water', I was 4 days early for my first child, hence why I thought I pissed myself cause everyone kept telling me "youll be late", "first babies always come late", im also a virgo, so I was very pleased she came early. I didnt start contractions till late at night, around 9pm. In the end because she was in my womb for a long time I had to stay in hospital for 5 days so they could monitor her, they're was a risk of infection. Anyways shout out to Christchurch Hospital, I had an amazing birth. Thank-you Carrie for sharing🥰
The contractions came later for me too after my water. I’m so glad you have an amazing birth!!
I live in Alaska and work in a maternity clinic as a nurse. Our primary goal for our mothers is to combat the negative self and societal talk that women always seem to hear. We hate the “just you wait comments” and encourage moms to live fully in all of the feelings they experience.
I think all the negative “just you wait” stuff is a reaction to the not-so-distance past where women essentially felt tricked into motherhood as this glorious fulfilment of their purpose and without any understanding of some of the harder realities. In an effort to correct this, we’ve possibly swung too much the other way into demonising the whole experience. Like anything in life, it will come with its highs and its lows.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Would you be willing to share a video of your postpartum must-haves?
i never really realized how common miscarriages were until i became a postpartum nurse. Id say more than 80% of my patients have had at least one miscarriage. Having experienced one of my own, that knowledge doesnt make it less painful but it at least gave me hope that I would conceive a healthy child one day and I have! just like most women do
And it’s actually really rare that water breaks before labour. For most people it happens must later
Thx Carrie ❤❤
I particularly hated the "wait till you toilet train". My older daughter was born with a developmental disability and did not fully bowel train till she was 5. The comments and "advice" from people was brutal at times. If you don't have anything good to say, then say nothing. This was a good topic and hopefully helpful for new moms.
Be careful telling viewers certain things. After my water broke my baby was born within 5 hours. I barely had time to get to the hospital and almost didn’t get my epidural. Just because your experience was a certain way doesn’t mean that’s the way it is.
She said "depending on the situation of course"❤
Carrie that was excellent advice
Just wanna say HI CARRIE I’m part of your Instagram chatroom and saw you’re replying sooooo EEEP HIIIIII. SOOOOO excited for a new video! Yall are rockstars. 🩷
Hiii!!! Thanks for being here! I so so appreciate you!!! 💕💕
Carrie, IndiaBatson UA-camr needs some of your love & vote of confidence….having lost two babies…. FYI….so happy for your loving family! U are blessed. Ciao for now, Vita Maria from California
It took me longer to birth the placenta than the baby. Also having to triple feed but it was totally worth it!
Really?? Wow! Do you know why it took that long for the placenta?
@@CarrieRad I'm not sure. I guess every birth is different and I ran out of adrenaline. My milk supply didn't come in and then when it did a week later it was barely enough to feed him. We supplemented with formula the first 8 weeks and then finally built up a supply so we breastfed only between 8 weeks and 6 months when he started solids. Still sorta breastfeeding now at 1.5 years so totally worth triple feeding earlier on.
I was not prepared for the extreme fatigue or the appetite. It still shocks me that I ate FOUR square meals PLUS snacks every day! 😂
I had terrible morning, noon and night sickness ,but after 6 weeks I ate anything that didn't get up off the plate and run, LOL. Gained 43 lbs and was ravenous for food. Not junk food either. I ate good foods. My daughter was 8lb 8oz.
I never say the “just you wait” but I do think it. Ecsp when you have a friend who thinks she can still party as a new mother and pass her kid off on everyone and anyone. Saying things like “You guys knew I didn’t want kids!!! Why didn’t you stop me?” 😂😂Whattttt
I was sooo constipated all pregnancy but that first PP poo…I honestly can’t believe i survived it 😅🙃
Can you share your favorite postpartum meal preps, snacks or recipes ? I want to try and be prepped!
This is a great idea. 🤍
As a mom of a toddler who is struggling with this phase I found some of this to be tone deaf in line with the toxic positivity I see around motherhood struggles. For some of us in the thick of a challenging time hearing this ‘look for the rainbow’ perspective to be invalidating and totally off putting
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I got really sad when she said take the maternity photos cuz i didnt. And im fully committed to never getting pregnant again. Also do a stupid gender reveal. Its just son fun. I didnt do that either
I feel this because i wish we did something more fun for our gender reveal but we kept it super casual, there's something special about that too though!
Carrie that was interesting. Remember, women have the greatest gift of giving life. Your now prepared for the 9 other babies to follow. Just joking. What did surprise me was what involvement your husband had in pregnancy.
Alex is so helpful! ☺️