Three Silly Little Thoughts | dating, vulnerability & everything being embarassing :' )
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
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I haven’t had therapy in about a month and your words are true medicine in the morning while I drink matcha and wish we were in-person friends 🥰🥰🥰 Thanks Nina for making us all feel more human and validated. You are sacred. I am sacred. We all deserve pleasure, love and peace.
adored this. I love how you speak and think and reflect
I feel you on the boredom aspect, which leads to a depressed mood in my case. I like my work fine, set my own schedule, live in a beautiful city, have friends, do yoga. Still, I get bored a lot. Sometimes the thought that things are always the same and I'm just getting older anguishes me. It easily turns into "what's the point?" and "do I have to keep doing this until I die?" I try to combat that by going to a different coffee shop or taking a different route, for example, but it's not that effective in the long-term.
move abroad
Thanks for the suggestion but I think you missed the point.
I have the same issue... What I've been trying to do is to try to learn new skills that have some kind of meaning or utility to me. Like learn to grow plants, learn an instrument, learn how to make soups, learn how to build a furniture by myself or idk something new that could excite me :)
@@Soleil-vk9ts Yeah, that's good advice:) I do something similar when I'm not feeling too lazy or despondent.
Really sweet video Nina! Loved getting to know your thought process. And finding true, authentic joy in simple (non grand) life moments such as you said - baking a cake, is a totally different key to happiness. All the best to ya x
This is crazy, I'm going through the exact same thing right now, it made me cry 😔
I spent some years single after 2 long relationships, learned a lot about myself, got into a new relationship thinking I'm so much more evolved (in a lot of things yes! but not all), and things came up.
Was single again, thought I had it figured out (because I knew the problems and knew to avoid them), got into another relationship, all good in the first months, then I become comfortable and all old patterns start to resurface.
What I learned is that it's much more effective to be in therapy when you're in a relationship (or dating in general) and work on it, than when you're not, because then you don't have examples, you think you're over the bad patterns etc...
Bottom line, a lot of times you can't really "heal yourself" by being single, but rather work on the problems when they come up, and hopefully your partner is mature and loving enough to support you throughout this journey.
I just ended my relationship 2 days ago, having just gotten back to therapy, so I hope I can still manage to continue it and do better next time 🥲
It is so great to watch you articulate what goes through most of our minds! Sometimes the world can feel like no one is having these experiences.
💜💜💜
Very true! Part of being compassionate towards yourself is understanding that you’re not alone in your experiences, ever. It’s harder to believe it than to simply say it, but it’s the beauty of opening up and being vulnerable!!!
Your videos are so beautiful and comforting Nina! Thank you for sharing ❣️
Yeah, I also feel like that, the part what you said that you think you've evolved, but when you're in real situations with people you're almost completely opposite of what you believed you were. I'm paraphysing here :)
Love your thought process here on letting people in and vulnerability. I don't have any problem with dating simply because I've been with my boyfriend for almost 9 years, but I have a problem with friendship. I feel like I cannot find real, honest people who will always be there for me. There always seems to be like a barrier and even if I get attached to people, at some point I feel like they disappoint me and I simply push them out of my life. I don't know if people are the problem or if I am the problem, as it seems to be a repeating pattern. My mom or relatives tell me that it's normal and that you only have two - three real friends max, but I don't feel like I have any. I'm 26 and it's really something that I suffer from. I can talk to my boyfriend and I know he won't judge me, but it's not the same talking to friends. Anyways, I still have a lot of work to do with myself haha. Thanks Nina for this thought provoking video :)
I love that you're talking about vulnerability with your unmade bed in the background:) I also struggle with shutting myself off and being afraid to show the real me. Not only the messy house, but letting even close people see me without the bit of makeup that I use and glasses. But I'm way better now😉
loved hearing your thoughts nina! i feel like you just formulated more clearly what i've been ruminating about in my own silly little brain :))
me encanta escucharte Nina, se siente como si estuviera hablando con una amiga ❤️ justo estas semanas que estoy conociendo a alguien empecé a aceptar el mostrarme más vulnerable porque entendí que hacerlo también es ser sincera conmigo misma y fiel a mis emociones, me encantó el vídeo ❤️
OPEN HEART SEASON BABY!!!!! CRINGE CLUB!!!!!
EARLY CLUB SEASON TOO JIJI MY LITTLE MADRUGADORA
This was so lovely. Thank you SOOO much for sharing. Please do not hesitate to do more videos like this.
Thank you for this. Needed to hear it! And thank you as always for your vulnerability and your critique of this strange youtube world of idealized lives that can seem so unattainable. More youtubers need to document the mundane.
I just love how you express your thoughts so beautifully. It warms my soul. We are not alone. Isn’t it frustratingly magnificent being a human with all of these conflicting and confronting emotions?
I relate so much with your recurring thoughts Nina! In the past years, I've been in isolation too. I actively decided not to commit to any relationship because I wanted to work on myself on my own. I thought that I should first deal with issues on my own and then dive into a relationship... only to find out that there's still so much work to do. Devastating indeed because I thought I had my sh*t together, that I healed myself, but the truth is - things will still come up while interacting with other people.
If at first I met these feelings and experiences with much frustration,
I now look at them with more compassion,
smiling at the fact that these will be recurring cyclical life-long patterns and lessons for my experiential living :)
Regarding the first part of this: i'd watch your vids even if it was you talking and recording the exact same breakfast every week!
I needed this video more than I realised when I clicked on it. Thank you for the inspiration
Send that text folks!!!!!!!! xx
SEND EM! WITH CAPS!!! AND MANY EXCLAMATION MARKS!!! 👼🏼👼🏼👼🏼
Yess I’m never this early haha ☀️ It’s only 8:42am here so this is the perfect video to watch before work, alongside my coffee ☕️ Love from Toronto! ✨
I think this is my favorite video you've ever done. Thank you for sharing this process.
Oh my goodness I relate to this chat about vulnerability and absorbing all the rhetoric off of lovely IG therapy posts so so much! Putting it into practice is much more difficult
Right!! The good part I suppose is that we can reference back. One of the reasons I know I have work to do is because I have the knowledge that better ways/habits/communication exists because of all the therapists i follow and the therapy I’ve had in the past!! :)
I'll just say that I needed this video, thank you ❤️
Thank you so much Nina, it was exactly what i needed to hear today, truly !
Thank u for sharing your thoughts Nina
Ahhh thank you Matilde 💝 I’m happy it resonated 🥹
@@nina.montagne 💜
i love youuuu. you're speaking to my own experiences; thank you thank you thank you
Also a think a lot of us with autism don’t like small talk. So we love the deepness and the vulnerability that comes with communication.
gracias Nina
Lovely video. I think you might appreciate the philosophize this podcast on silence, obedience and joy. Let me know how you like if you give it a listen.
thank you for giving this platform meaning and value - I always appreciate your point of view as it feels like I'm talking (and being vulnerable) with a good friend
Nina means comfort 💛thank you for your words :)
Gracias Nina ♥️ es totalmente devastador el proceso de estar en dating apps y rechazar y ser rechazada. Quizás podría ser un buen tema para otro vídeo? El rechazo? Me ha encantado escucharte y me ha dado mucho que pensar mil gracias de verdad, un abrazo enorme!
I think that are too hard on yourself in your introspection. Life is fluid not linear and we all have ups and downs and moments when we think we are the problem to solve. Life has taught me that the best experiences and relationships happen organically when I allow my true self to be seen flaws and all which I believe was your point. Sometimes vulnerability is allowing “I am good enough right now”. I enjoy your insightful vlogs.
Even though I followed your channel mainly for the food content I loved this video and the opinions presented!
What a lovely vidéo and great great thoughts.
I remember seeing something about the messy house and still letting people in a few years ago when i really needed to learn that. So thank you very much for the reminder, it is so easy to forget and to close the door
Wow so relatable!! I’ve been single for a million years too😃 haha loved that.
Not everything has to be grand feels like a sweet tattoo too😏
Very thought provoking, thank you! Totally relate on the 'don't mistaken busyness with happiness' part and the home Metapher really really spoke to me 🏡
Love your analysis so much .. wish you the best
I enjoyed this soo much, thank you Nina 🥰
l luv youuu
Love how well and amazing you give advice and you are so great with words honestly! Love hearing your voice, it is so soothing!😍💕
Beautiful and your UA-cam this year is also documenting your hair growth journey 💇♀️
Hahaha so true!!! It’s been a year since I cut it all off. I wonder when I’ll get sick of it 🫠
Thank you so much for your videos. I thought it would be embarrassing to leave a comment on a UA-cam video because I never do that but I’ll embrace it to let you know that you make me happy with every video you post and I am honesty very grateful for your thoughts and wisdom. Thank you 🌞
Ohhhh yay look at us go!!! I love receiving comments please do COMMENT SO I CAN PRETEND WERE CLOSE FRIENDS GETTING OVER EVERYTHING FEELING EMBARASSING TOGETHER THANKUUUU 💐❣️🎉
@@nina.montagne 🥰🥰🥰
Thank you so much Nina!
What camera do you use?
nuggets of wisdom
loved this so much
Hello from Hobart!
I really needed to hear this. Thank you so mcuh.
Your videos are such a comfort space for me, always feel as if a good friend is speaking to me. Thank you Nina 🌻
Ohhh Marion 🥹 THANKUUUU!! This makes me so so happy 💘
Same girl same
This video came at a perfect time for me, thanks for sharing your lil thoughts and they help a lot more than you realise :)
This makes me so happy to hear Zoe!!! I sometimes feel a little weird making videos like this but I’m glad it resonated 💘💘💘
@@nina.montagne I'm glad!! I think it's a huge step to being more vulnerable by being able to not only admit these things to yourself but then making it into a video to help others too :)💕
Big hug to you Nina that was a wonderful video!
Ohhh the biggest hug back!!! Hope you’re well 💘💘💘
🫶🏽 loveee your videos! vulnerability is such an interesting topic!
I loved this, thank you Nina. I think you said some very true and important things about being vulnerable. (I also think you have such a beautiful and calming voice 😊) .
YES for everything you said. Cynicism is so boring. Expecting the worst is not logic; it's feeling. We, as a society, should stop thinking pessimism is real and logic and even training ourselves to kill our hope before it even gets a chance.
There are tender and loving people on Earth the moment we decide to be that ourselves
It's weird, you often end up saying exactly what I need to here in the moment :) please continue sharing your 'silly' little thoughts!
The world needs more videos like this and more people like Nina. Thank you for reminding us all that boring old everyday life is enough and we should focus on finding beauty there rather than always wanting to run off somewhere else. I personally really needed to hear this, so thank you ❤️
My thought on the home analogy is also reaching a point where I'm organized and secure enough to be willing to clean up after people a bit when they leave your home. Instead of being angry and frustrated that someone came into your home and left without helping you with the dishes or after stinking up your bathroom just knowing that it's still your home and it isn't ruined and you like it enough to tidy up after people. And that sometimes people will come along who will stick around and respect the space the way you hoped.
I know this is probably the exact wrong thing to focus on but would love to infuse my Instagram feed with some good therapist content if you have recommendations!
I appreciated this video so much. I needed all the reminders--especially about reaching out to friends more in my rough patches. Tysm. **hugs**
ugh! and just as i was craving a video from u here you come with a wonderful one
I usually never comment your videos but I truly love watching them there isn't one where I feel bored. You always have words of wisdoms to share, great recipes that look delicious and a simple and lovely way of filming and editing everything 😇
Who are your favourite therapists to follow on insta?? Would love some positive influence in my feed !
I loved this and I related so much to what you were saying about how confronting it is to realize that you still have a (very) long way to go once you start meeting new people. I spent so much time thinking that I was so evolved because I was single and I was working on myself and now I see that I am a baby when it comes to relationships and I still have so much shit to figure out 🤦
This has really helped me today. Thank you for being so vulnerable and open
This video helped me so much. The clean house vulnerability discussion hit home a lot as well. Haha a lovely pun
i love this type of video nina!, thanks a lot for the advices, i feel like i needed to hear that because i'm a very closed person
I'm gonna be sweet after this video for someone else and send that text I should've sent earlier
I just love you Nina. Great video againn
this was very helpful nina. thank you
Loved this and yes to everything you said! Somehow this was exactly what i needed to hear. On the dating topic: for a long time i thought that in a new relationship i would let go of all my old patterns. Now i realise that this is a fantasy. I did do a lot of work and learned a great deal and what can change is my reaction to it. This gave me somehow also a feeling of relief :)
Have you looked into asd on tik tok? A fellow on the spectrum person can see another one. I feel like it could also help you figure out yourself more love and in the love department. ❤️
Hey! I’m not on the spectrum, I have adhd (waiting on my official diagnosis). Big hug x
hermoso video ✨
Oh Tassie 💔
Oh my god thank the lord you posted this lol wow did I need to hear it. I love these styles of videos
Ahhh Nicole!!! I’m glad!! the biggest of hugs to you ❣️
absolutely loved it
Thank you Clara 🥹💘💐
LOVE THIS
THANK YOU LIZA
Specialness in mundaneness is maybe the secret to it all 💛 thanks for your words Nina the way you think and share is so wonderful !!
I love these thoughts, Nina! Especially the bit on vulnerability and omg, that TikTok ruined me ❤️💔❤️🩹 so relatable! Where I'm at in my life, after being in monogamous relationships for 14 years and just going through a breakup, I actually think it's more valuable to do work on myself for a while so that I don't get into another relationship for the wrong reasons (fear of being alone, mainly). It's clear to me that you've done a lot of work on yourself and I find it really inspiring. Definitely will keep in mind that it's important to not do it all alone/utilize my support network/be vulnerable with people that feel safe too. Anyways, thanks for this!
SO MUCH HELPFUL darling, you don’t know how much 🪰🌼♥️