THEY NEED TO ADOPT THE LAWS OF SCANDANAVIA. You are obligated by Law to have the kids 50/50. 2 weeks with dad, 2 weeks with mom. Its a criminal offense if you do otherwise. There's not even a court hearing about it. Its standard Law. So both parents have to live within the school area to ensure smooth transition for the child. This will make people think twice before marrying, having kids or divorcing.
I'm glad my father fought hard to be a part of our lives. I am who I am mostly because I had my dad in my life. My mother was very bitter after their divorce and tried to use us as weapons. Dad fought back! He was not having none of that BS. As a grown woman now married (27 years) with adult children I appreciate my dad even more. I learnt a lot from him. Mum is still bitter to this day.However, it's her choice. Life doesn't stop because you are angry! Fight to see your kids Penuel. They will appreciate you later.
The silent majority of men are watching. We agree with your views. We won't come out in open to defend you because of our careers but just know we have your back.
No man u cannot have ur career as an excuse over fighting for ur seed...unless I don't understand ur point 🤔 if you're in the background ths awareness won't get the momentum it needs...the more support he has the more the state is also aware of ths and perhaps might change the law around co parenting
@@VAN_M57it’s either you are self employed or unemployed. If you worked in typical corporate you would understand that we live in a gynocentric society. We need to pander to women’s emotions and feelings or suffer severe consequences. All it takes is one false accusation and your fucked. So no he is not wrong by not jeopardising his career for the child he has no access to due to bitter crazy baby Mama.
23:07 Most Married guys getaway with a lot. I think women glorify being married over the type of father their husband is to the kids. There are married guys who deserve to be taken to maintenance court and children’s court. But the women don’t see it because they are looking at the ring on their fingers.
As a Man in this Country the Courts are biased when it comes to divorced Fathers with kid's, let us Men breach a Court order and see how quickly Men will get arrested. Im going through hell with Access for my only Child. the Double Standards are Shocking.
I don't always agree with you but on this particular matter, I'm all for it!!! You're the blueprint and have the potential to change laws for the rest of us. What a level headed lad. Big ups bhuti 🔥
I can relate, the courts failed me and my daughter on many occasions. Crazy enough with my case it was my daughter who solved it for me when she was 11 while her mother always refused for her to visit (which the court had ordered for her to visit every alternative weekend) and my daughter said... daddy allow me to tell mommy that I want to come to your house. I thank God everyday for daughter
Shame man, mna I was failed by the social development I guess the magistrate helped me. Now there's a parenting plan in place and I can't wait for my daughter to be old enough to speak her truth.
Eish yaz I feel his pain...nami I'm that single mother of 5 but I do right by my daughter shem. I cannot afford to have her blame me later in life for my choices ai
@VAN_M57 exactly most of these evil women are working. I'm unemployed baby daddy too, but I made sure he comes to pick up our son when he calls him. Kids don't know what money is but they know what food is and play time is. I pray that my baby daddy gets a job so he can be able to buy my sons favorite macD burger ya toy. Time is precious, especially playing with them
Try not remaining single but be very deliberate on your choosing the father for your 4 year old because the single thing is not working out nice in the end generally.
@bongumenzinzama6896 men have a tendency of letting go trying to avoid arguments and fights. But this fight is about your blood 2 boys Nogal, they won't understand your excuse for not fighting harder. Instead it creates a bigger hatred
I disagree with you on this whole heartedly. I saw your interview with DJ Sbu. I am deeply concerned with your take on this. You fathered children with 5 women out of wedlock. All your problems stem from there. Your lack of regard for the family unit has resulted in your issues. You get no sympathy from me. How you have behaved is in unhonorable. These are the results. You speak of these women coming from single mother's and yet you created 5. The court can not favour someone with your disregard for the family unit and who places children in this position. Pay the child support. That has nothing to do with access to the children. Solve the matters with the mothers but leave the childrens wellbeing out of this. I am a man and a father. I was a young boy once and i was reckless but thankfully I recognized that without destroying so many lives. I'm not perfect but this isn't acceptable. Especially when you cry to the public about things you did in private. Good luck. I truly hope you get to see your children but not like this
He went to the highest authorities i.e courts to solve this problem and they have failed to assist. Did you really listen to all of this video? Note: I'm also a participating father and I used to criticise Penuel's public declaration on this because some people are unfortunately not smart to decipher the messaging. You're however right in saying that, all of this is the result of not a pursuing a family unit... But it is the past. It is a lesson for the future. For now, Penuel needs a solution since the highest authorities failed to assist him. Should he kidnap the children? What is your solution. How else do you suggest he should resolve this.
@@teem5945 i have watched the Dj Sbu interview and the whole of this video. I completely understand what is going on. Hence at the end I hope he gets to see his children. I am a father and if my wife were to deprive me of seeing my child it would destroy me. I would do all in my power to have access to my child. Hence I chose to have a child with a woman I not only love but could build a home and a future with. I married her. I'm still with her. I love my family. Nothing is perfect but I have done all on my power to give child a home and love. I have treated my partner and her family with love and respect. I believe I have chosen well. When my partner and I went to our prenup the lawyer said to me that if things don't work out the court will make judgement based on the law and how we lived together. They will make judgment based on prolonged behavior and the interest of the child. Essentially how I treat my my child and my wife will matter in the rulings. Now, is there possibilities of misrepresentation of the facts? Absolutely. But how I have lived my life and treated my family will be evident if taken to court. I'm not saying it will he easy but i will have a good chance. Look at the worst scenario with Tumisho Masha. It was difficult and the courts were harsh but with investigation into the matter and his relationship with his child and the fact they were married the court couldn't deprive him of access to his child. Which should tell you a lot about this matter. Courts are not always fair but by Panuels own admission it's clear just from behavior that he has a prolonged disregard for the family unit. Even from a traditional stand point his behavior would be judged harshly. I hope he gets to see his children. I have no solution as to how. I have made it a point in my life to not put myself, my wife and child in this situation. However withholding financial support (illegally at that) from the children is not the answer. The courts will only be harsher on him as a result. You can fight with the mother but both of you should never use the children. Pay and keep fighting in court. If you stop paying you automatically lose
You are no better than the baby mamas if you withhold maintenance. Both parties are now using the children as weapons against the other, nonke seniyalayana. Basically you are saying if you can't access your kids they dont deserve to eat, have clothes or have their other needs taken care of...the same your baby mammas are saying if he wont do as we please then our kids dont deserve to have a relatioship with their dad. If I was in your shoes I would still send my kids money and place my pride aside as much as it hurts....
There's this one clause on the family court order with regard to father's access to their children that speaks of "the father can have access to the child on his turn to fetch the child GIVEN THE CHILD AND MOTHER ARE AVAILABLE" mothers take advantage of it so well, you will be told they're not available all the time and There's nothing the courts can do about it.
Was in a similar situation and I was told to just pray. I couldn't believe my ears, but yea, the law is just a piece of paper. Funny that the same police or courts would arrest you in a blink of an eye dare you forcefully take YOUR kids.
Great that you have been open about this topic. Once we are able to openly and honestly speak about pertinenet issues, then the battle will surely be won. There are many issues with baby mammas, pappas, maintenance, and above all making sure that children know their parents and that their parents spend time with them.
sometimes people want to intellectualize everything, we are Africans. And in African culture there is something called inhlawulo( paying damages to the family of a woman you have impregnated) i do not hear anything about that in this video. Some families are very strict when it comes to that custom, which is why they have probably denied you access to your kids. Let this be an example to other men who think they can go around impregnating different women and leave them, there is surrogacy if you want nothing to do with the mother of your child after the child is born.
I don't have access to my kid as well but i still pay 3k monthly and its my choice i hope one day the he understand because i want him to lack nothing, the battle to see him if for another day
They will never understand they have hate growing ....they must see u ,u must be there they should remember u fighting for them getting chased...please take it seriously....I don't like my mother because she gave up on us...kids dint wanna hear ur stories ...a memory of u fighting for them counts that ur money.
So Penuel you’re withholding the kids financial aid because you don’t have access to them? The Children’s Act doesn’t say access to children should be withheld where the father is unable to financially provide for said child….
I stand with you Pen. I'm in the same situation. I'm a divorcee, loving father of two girls. The divorce was not my fault. I paid child maintenance and did many things. But for the last three months mommy decided that I should have access to my girls. I have no idea why. My heart is broken. I feel so sorry for them because I know that they love me
Those who prevent children from seeing a parent for no good reason - deprives children of everything father-ship stands for. They are accomplishes to an injustice to children.
Stooooooop!! Ths judgements n bashing are exhausting. Pls just stop. No one plans to not have access to their kids even if it's with 20 diff mothers, so what?? Point here is a father u desperately wants to be a part of his kids lives. C'mon guys man...other men don't give 2 fucks about their seeds
@@VAN_M57 its logical thinking to expect some things to not work out when you busy with multiple things at once, in his case 5 bms obvious ngeke kulunge yonke indawo, you guys are spiraling trying to justify his shitty behavior.
Your problem is not having had been open with these poor women from the beginning. You love the idea of multiple partners and have not presented that from inception of the relationships you had with these women. Now you cry foul. These are the results of your actions. Be humble and try see this issue from the perspective these women. You wronged them. You used them to have an army of kids. These are your values. But you can't play with people like that. I'm glad that SA law deprives people like you to perpetually mess young women 's lives for satisfaction of your own ego.
Yet as mothers the when we withhold contact as a result of no maintenance the courts tell us that maintenance and visitation are not related. We’re forced to deal with narcissistic, financially abusive fathers who know they can abuse the courts system to absolve themselves of the responsibility to parent. This is a mans world. Forcing a child to have a relationship with an abusive financially and otherwise, is not in the best interests of the child. But the courts me.
@@PhillTholoI understand, Phil and sorry that you’re going through this, the issue at hand is multi faceted, however directed to Pan, literally he had everything in his power to stick to one baby mama
Do you know the horrors that children go through in the foster system including abuse of all types? Advocating for that shows that yiundont give a damn about those kids. It's your ego that's damaged and your need to settle scores. Nothing to do with those children
I won't engage the other nonsense you wrote, but I will say this: if my video additionally highlights a rot in the foster parenting system, then it needs to be investigated and fixed, so that kids don't suffer there unnecessarily.
@@Penuelism DAWG DONT STOP SUPPORTING YOUR KIDS, YOUR KIDS WILL GROW AND KNOW THE TRUTH. THESE SOCIAL MEDIA ANTICS AREN'T GOING TO HELP YOU IN NO WAY AND STOP HAVING KIDS, GET A VASECTOMY.
This guy's giving khohlakele/cruel vibes...I feel like I'd also run away 😂 is not make sure...but none the less let kids spend time with their(mentally healthy) dads maan for the kids sake
It's funny how maridge the church and traditional communities have conflict resolution methods for such cases. But we chose to rather do our own thing then consult ancient wisdom.
Brother black pen you are not alone. I am also going through the same thing. the last time I saw my daughter was 2022 till to date I never saw her again. Her mother lives in soweto, I live in soweto but she took my child to limpopo
Fight for your parental rights and responsibilities, go to court. A friend of mine did, his daughter is with him as we speak and mommy knows that jail is where she's going if she deprives him of his rights towards his daughter.
I just have a baby girl only 8 days old I pray to God even if me and the father don’t work out, I pray I can be able to separate him as a lover and him being a father I pray I never use my daughter against him no matter what he does to me the only person that suffers is a child A man is capable of being a bad lover and broke and still be a good father if the mother supports the relationship Let’s try guys
IF you are a bad Lover you are equally a bad father.A abusive Lover or husbands is mirroring bad behavior to his children.Both roles are connected.A bad and abusive Wives,cant be an Loving Mother.
The whole "in the best interest of the child" is an incomplete sentence in SA. It is actually "in the best interest of the child - as long as the mother agrees". Consenquences should be equal for all that break the law - not just men, but ke, here we are. Strength to all us brothers in this battle. Let's hope that things will get better (or somewhat fair) in our lifetime.
But it seems the scheme of children laws in SA is that if you are unmarried father, automatically mother become superior parent. The only right recognised for the unmarried father is access and duty to support. And worse the two are not intertwined. Meaning even if mother says f*u , dont see child, duty still remains to support. Sth must be done so that access and duty goes together. I got this from google, i may be incorrect.
Nah bru majority of blacks families were raised by single moms & we not criminals as a result Whatever issues you have with your other kids moms but u can't stop paying maintenance. Musa ukudlala ndoda sibadala masingaka. Another thing a person who was once close to as those 2 ladies understand u as a person more than we do. Im sure each will have their reasons y they are acting this way.
We all have a part to play, as a wife I also encourage my husband to make time for his son. It’s not about monthly maintenance payments no no. Even now me and our 2 boys are home at my mothers and they are spending the holidays just the two of them. If we all work together we can win this battle
The path is challenging for men, and I empathize with the children. I've observed that many women often seek to penalize men by restricting their access to the kids or preventing them from playing significant roles in decisions that could impact the children's futures, such as choices related to schooling and living conditions.
It's really stupid of women to do this, I don't understand the logic behind ths. It damages the child more than the parents...yes if the fathers are abusive or not mentally fit or are addicts that way you're protecting the child but jus njeee nje to be spiteful aikhona
When it comes to GBV this country made sure that the abuse is only against women. Anything from a mans side is nt taken seriously. That is y they r willing to blacklist men only. Absolutely no punishment for women.
Absolutely not. The one refusing access to the father must save HER OWN money for the future. She chose to raise the kids ALONE without a father. Her kids don’t have a father right now according to her. So let her save money and raise them
It's your obligation as a man to provide for your child. This generation of men are weaklings honestly. Whatever transpired between you and the mother has nothing to do with the child. Play your role I'm sure many of you were inconsistent fathers hence the mothers choosing the difficult role of being single mothers.
Pennuel , I tell you , you will talk till cows comes home. There are fathers like you looking after their kids. ,,,,,,,,but not all. I n the same breathe there are good baby mamas out there. Weaponising children against their fathers is so unfair, but it happens. W e probably need baby daddys like you to continue with such conversations. I m a woman by the way, but let us be grown ups , its time we listen to the other side equally. I f we allow such pain to continue unabated is not only dangerous but shows how lazy, UNCARING we are as a society have become. We should highlight problems as they UNFOLD. The revenge is scary!!!!!!! South Africa LETS WAKE UP.
You give people the right to judge you the moment you choose to bring your dirty laundry to public platform.he should be seeking counseling and therapy,not public sympathy. Baby mamas also have their side of the story.
You know what, I get your struggles and points. I hope you'll eventually pay and see your children after hearing you out. Especially if you say it's only been 3 months.
I chose not to force child maintenance to force him out of my kids life, it’s been a year we are doing very well. I hope my kids will be well developed by the time they need to deal with him again.
Eeeeyi I understand what u mean by ths...I was in a similar situation, I even told the social worker I'm happy if he doesn't pay maintenance coz then it means I get to heal without any triggers. I get my peace, I raise my daughter as a healthy mother. Yes financially it was gonna be tough but peace and healing first. The state decided otherwise for me 😢
@@someoneelse1895 if already you’ve decided one is propaganda what’s there for us to think you will be sane enough to hear the other side, gaslighting one side to protect the side you haven’t hear in itself is problematic if you ask me.
Penuel I applaud you for publicly taking ownership of your situation and giving your side of the story. However my brother you are leading the single mother pandemic and have contributed immensely to it. What most men miss is that you cannot call yourself a father when you are not raising your children. Having visitation rights means that you get to live your carefree life and tap into “parenting” as and when it suits you. My child’s father lives in a different country and last saw our daughter when she was born, he video calls her on weekends and has built a connection with her, there is no way you can call this parenting. Being a parent requires you to be there for the day to day experiences, taking full responsibility of your kids. Be there for the meltdowns, the outbursts of joy over silly things…. as opposed to coming in for a day or a week, then calling yourself a father? You are not a father, you are just a sperm donor who is privileged to see how their kids turn out, let’s not undermine fatherhood!
Mate you blaming Lawyers,courts,the state, neighbours, reserve bank, pilots, employers, twitter and baby mamas for your reckless behaviour? 😅😅😅😅 5 baby mamas? You moving in the fast lane.
Monna di deng ebohloko. Ke qetetse ngwanka ale 5-6 years...ke sure ngwanaka osale boma 9-10 years noulas. The courts couldn't help me out, so lenna I stopped paying maintenence, why should I pay if I don't see my kid. Im not dumb and naive, I tried the traditional route, nothing. all i can say is that the mother of my child is EVIL. because nothing will ever justify her actions to deprive our kid to see me. and I know there's more men who are "ATM Dads" they don't see the kids, they just send money, I refuse that shit. Ke batla ho bona ngwana, hao hard can that be?? well in South Africa men have no rights to their kids.
What you did is right. You used your X account and your channel to talk about an issue that has plaqued South African Men. The bigger problem is society made up of toxic families which perpetuates this behavior. It's true most of these women, were raised by toxic mothers as well. It cuts deep!!! 💔
I never too Pen serious until after I learned about parenting issues. And I started to pay attention only to find uJita is smart, an alpha male who is not afraid of the truth. Salute kid
This is more common than nuclear families. We really need to think long and hard, do you want children or the man? This feels like they wanted him, very spiteful. I hope the 2 mothers heal.❤
Kids will never understand that u send money every month they have hate growing ....they must see u ,u must be there they should remember u fighting for them getting chased...please take it seriously....I don't like my mother because she gave up on us...kids dint wanna hear ur stories ...a memory of u fighting for them counts that ur money..fighting means u showed up physically many times getting chased etc...u showed up using a mediator to see if they are ok etc...
This problem you having is not unique to you, millions of men and women around the world have the same problems.. .life goes on, mothers can leave , your expectation that they would remain in gauteng was naïve..again, its your problem, not theirs.. now, you want courts to move mountains for fathers?? it seems you are not aware of gbv, just the other day a father in kzn killed his 3 year old child and the mother.. so you cannot come here with those things that courts must move mountains so fathers see their kids.. most father who left their babies mommas are not good people, they are abusers in different ways.. school, food, cloths, etc is nothing less than 3k a month.. if u have 10 kids, your maintenance is minimum 30k a month.. before making all these kids, did you not think about these consequences ? then if u not paying, obviously the mothers are goin to make your life difficult, just pay baba..u made them, so pay, then deal with other issues after.. u cant go to court with dirty hands, meaning, u didnt pay maintenance, now you want the courts help.. at least be up to date when u go to court..its called the doctrine of clean hands.. now , love your kids, its clear, i dont think we doubt that, but their are other factors baba.. women dont think the way men think..so ya, take what i said anyway u like..your issue is you, after 2 baby mommas u never learnt your lesson, so you now reaping what u have sown..u cant excuse it by saying they were planed.. thats even worse, imagine after 6 kids u then plan no.7... lik wtf..you cannot be ok bro.. good luck.
The law fails everyone is all I can say. And the issue is that the failing did not start with the law, but with the people involved. This is what made things complicated. Social issues. Hard to half solve issues
Guys who go to court and lie are the ones who ruin this for men who are serious about being present fathers. My baby daddy even got people from that state family advocates office to call me, coerce and threaten me into doing what my baby daddy wants. Luckily i recorded the phone calls. They lied about a file being opened against me at the childrens court claiming that i am denying him access. I went to children's court to find out what is going on, i find out that the file was opened the day before i went to enquire about this file yet people from the advocate's office had harassed me weeks. And i had proof that my baby daddy was lying. Sorry that you are going through this.
It helped a lot. I was advised to create a parental plan in order to protect myself from such claims. I really don't get why with you things are so complicated. But hey, all the best.
Damn! Its kinda ironic how in a country of so many fatherless children u find urself in this unfair predicament! I almost went through the same thing but lucky for me she snapped out of it quick and realised that i was needed in my boys' lives.
I believe you did listen to the whole clip and also understand or have never been in that situation. You are telling me that those fathers who are not working must be denied access to their children's. Penuel is fighting for access to his children here, not to support them
Pen, your Twitter account has blocked me. Not sure why. I don't know you personally and believe I have never sent you anything offensive. I was to follow. Is there a particular reason I'm blocked?
Pen,i here your cry here.what i hink you need to do on the situation. Ask all ofthem to marry them.just marry there no love involve.you will get chance to have all your children together with their mothers. You will solve the situationn that your having.
Sunday World Article: sundayworld.co.za/celebrity-news/penuel-mlotshwa-withholds-papgeld-to-force-access-to-his-children/
iol Article: www.iol.co.za/news/crime-and-courts/popular-podcaster-penuel-chooses-not-to-pay-child-maintenance-to-gain-access-to-his-children-72cef4e2-fc05-425b-a9f1-8e5f8976486a
Instagram post: instagram.com/p/DDtWt_VsZFm/?igsh=djZoOTRhbThxbHk=
Twitter post: x.com/GodPenuel/status/1870049270998675794?t=9mzZ1vFbpC0PlBkwNUh7ag&s=19
Facebook post: facebook.com/share/p/15ePeg5SgE/
Fathers 4 Justice: www.f4j.co.za/?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAyJS7BhBiEiwAyS9uNd-qG5mXADWaeO71nOqJHBTtIYU1uXECOkfAeVsZCqPzL9KI8yK20hoCY1wQAvD_BwE&v=eacb463a8002
Family Matters in South Africa: www.justice.gov.za/fmadv/f_main.htm
Family Advocate Contact Details: www.justice.gov.za/fmadv/f_contacts.htm
Shout out for you Pen, please reach me, I wanna contribute my legal expertise as a legal practitioner
you raise very valid points and good on you for being so openly vulnerable as a man on these matters.
THEY NEED TO ADOPT THE LAWS OF SCANDANAVIA. You are obligated by Law to have the kids 50/50. 2 weeks with dad, 2 weeks with mom. Its a criminal offense if you do otherwise. There's not even a court hearing about it. Its standard Law. So both parents have to live within the school area to ensure smooth transition for the child. This will make people think twice before marrying, having kids or divorcing.
I'm glad my father fought hard to be a part of our lives. I am who I am mostly because I had my dad in my life. My mother was very bitter after their divorce and tried to use us as weapons. Dad fought back! He was not having none of that BS. As a grown woman now married (27 years) with adult children I appreciate my dad even more. I learnt a lot from him. Mum is still bitter to this day.However, it's her choice. Life doesn't stop because you are angry! Fight to see your kids Penuel. They will appreciate you later.
The silent majority of men are watching. We agree with your views. We won't come out in open to defend you because of our careers but just know we have your back.
Agreed!! I couldn’t have said it better myself.
No man u cannot have ur career as an excuse over fighting for ur seed...unless I don't understand ur point 🤔 if you're in the background ths awareness won't get the momentum it needs...the more support he has the more the state is also aware of ths and perhaps might change the law around co parenting
@@VAN_M57it’s either you are self employed or unemployed. If you worked in typical corporate you would understand that we live in a gynocentric society. We need to pander to women’s emotions and feelings or suffer severe consequences. All it takes is one false accusation and your fucked. So no he is not wrong by not jeopardising his career for the child he has no access to due to bitter crazy baby Mama.
The silence needs to end. Kids are suffering. They grow up to be Sibusiso Lawrence or promiscuous girls like abo Zodwa wabantu
Lol. What career will be harmed by this 🤣🤣🤣🤣
23:07 Most Married guys getaway with a lot. I think women glorify being married over the type of father their husband is to the kids. There are married guys who deserve to be taken to maintenance court and children’s court. But the women don’t see it because they are looking at the ring on their fingers.
You are speaking the truth, women idolise marriage too much.
@@PhumudzoMaguga ishu 🔥🔥🔥
So much truth here
True that!!!
As a Man in this Country the Courts are biased when it comes to divorced Fathers with kid's, let us Men breach a Court order and see how quickly Men will get arrested. Im going through hell with Access for my only Child. the Double Standards are Shocking.
I don't always agree with you but on this particular matter, I'm all for it!!! You're the blueprint and have the potential to change laws for the rest of us. What a level headed lad. Big ups bhuti 🔥
I can relate, the courts failed me and my daughter on many occasions. Crazy enough with my case it was my daughter who solved it for me when she was 11 while her mother always refused for her to visit (which the court had ordered for her to visit every alternative weekend) and my daughter said... daddy allow me to tell mommy that I want to come to your house. I thank God everyday for daughter
@@kennymokalane3015 you're blessed ❤️
Shame man, mna I was failed by the social development I guess the magistrate helped me. Now there's a parenting plan in place and I can't wait for my daughter to be old enough to speak her truth.
As a single mother of a 4 year old, I apologize to all fathers going through this
Eish yaz I feel his pain...nami I'm that single mother of 5 but I do right by my daughter shem. I cannot afford to have her blame me later in life for my choices ai
And his kids are so beautiful kanjan ai some women kodwa
@VAN_M57 exactly most of these evil women are working. I'm unemployed baby daddy too, but I made sure he comes to pick up our son when he calls him. Kids don't know what money is but they know what food is and play time is. I pray that my baby daddy gets a job so he can be able to buy my sons favorite macD burger ya toy.
Time is precious, especially playing with them
Try not remaining single but be very deliberate on your choosing the father for your 4 year old because the single thing is not working out nice in the end generally.
You are amazing. Much respect for you. Thank you for being the voice to the voiceless. All the best leader ❤️👏. You've got this
Thank you Penuel, you have Men and Fathers a Voice✊🏽
This whole situation is sad, I hope he doesn’t make anymore babies.
I can relate. It's painful. Haven't seen my twin boys for 1 year 6 months 😢 my mother in law won't let me see my kids 💔
The courts don't protect men. FORGET the courts.
Haibo mother inlaw, no ways fight abuti
You are too friendly my guy, fight for your kids.
@bongumenzinzama6896 men have a tendency of letting go trying to avoid arguments and fights. But this fight is about your blood 2 boys Nogal, they won't understand your excuse for not fighting harder. Instead it creates a bigger hatred
Are you trying to tell us that your MIL is the reason why you do not pay child support.
I disagree with you on this whole heartedly. I saw your interview with DJ Sbu. I am deeply concerned with your take on this. You fathered children with 5 women out of wedlock. All your problems stem from there. Your lack of regard for the family unit has resulted in your issues. You get no sympathy from me. How you have behaved is in unhonorable. These are the results. You speak of these women coming from single mother's and yet you created 5. The court can not favour someone with your disregard for the family unit and who places children in this position. Pay the child support. That has nothing to do with access to the children. Solve the matters with the mothers but leave the childrens wellbeing out of this. I am a man and a father. I was a young boy once and i was reckless but thankfully I recognized that without destroying so many lives. I'm not perfect but this isn't acceptable. Especially when you cry to the public about things you did in private. Good luck. I truly hope you get to see your children but not like this
Thank you!
You lost me at wedlock
He went to the highest authorities i.e courts to solve this problem and they have failed to assist.
Did you really listen to all of this video?
Note: I'm also a participating father and I used to criticise Penuel's public declaration on this because some people are unfortunately not smart to decipher the messaging.
You're however right in saying that, all of this is the result of not a pursuing a family unit...
But it is the past. It is a lesson for the future. For now, Penuel needs a solution since the highest authorities failed to assist him.
Should he kidnap the children?
What is your solution.
How else do you suggest he should resolve this.
@@teem5945 i have watched the Dj Sbu interview and the whole of this video. I completely understand what is going on. Hence at the end I hope he gets to see his children. I am a father and if my wife were to deprive me of seeing my child it would destroy me. I would do all in my power to have access to my child. Hence I chose to have a child with a woman I not only love but could build a home and a future with. I married her. I'm still with her. I love my family. Nothing is perfect but I have done all on my power to give child a home and love. I have treated my partner and her family with love and respect. I believe I have chosen well. When my partner and I went to our prenup the lawyer said to me that if things don't work out the court will make judgement based on the law and how we lived together. They will make judgment based on prolonged behavior and the interest of the child. Essentially how I treat my my child and my wife will matter in the rulings. Now, is there possibilities of misrepresentation of the facts? Absolutely. But how I have lived my life and treated my family will be evident if taken to court. I'm not saying it will he easy but i will have a good chance. Look at the worst scenario with Tumisho Masha. It was difficult and the courts were harsh but with investigation into the matter and his relationship with his child and the fact they were married the court couldn't deprive him of access to his child. Which should tell you a lot about this matter. Courts are not always fair but by Panuels own admission it's clear just from behavior that he has a prolonged disregard for the family unit. Even from a traditional stand point his behavior would be judged harshly. I hope he gets to see his children. I have no solution as to how. I have made it a point in my life to not put myself, my wife and child in this situation. However withholding financial support (illegally at that) from the children is not the answer. The courts will only be harsher on him as a result. You can fight with the mother but both of you should never use the children. Pay and keep fighting in court. If you stop paying you automatically lose
@@pointa2b388 then the message isn't for you its about you.
Sadly, this happens more common than we think. Thank you for giving men who can't speak for various reasons a voice.
Eish, it's a real topic of discussion. We can't keep recreating the trauma of abandonment.
And Pen is raising awareness here, but the comments are busy about diff mothers mxm. Missing the whole message
You are no better than the baby mamas if you withhold maintenance. Both parties are now using the children as weapons against the other, nonke seniyalayana. Basically you are saying if you can't access your kids they dont deserve to eat, have clothes or have their other needs taken care of...the same your baby mammas are saying if he wont do as we please then our kids dont deserve to have a relatioship with their dad. If I was in your shoes I would still send my kids money and place my pride aside as much as it hurts....
Ladies please try to be reasonable. You're only hurting the kids!!!! No matter what, your love for the kids should surpass your hate for the father.
So the children must suffer because the parents are idiots. Gotcha.
There's this one clause on the family court order with regard to father's access to their children that speaks of "the father can have access to the child on his turn to fetch the child GIVEN THE CHILD AND MOTHER ARE AVAILABLE" mothers take advantage of it so well, you will be told they're not available all the time and There's nothing the courts can do about it.
Was in a similar situation and I was told to just pray. I couldn't believe my ears, but yea, the law is just a piece of paper. Funny that the same police or courts would arrest you in a blink of an eye dare you forcefully take YOUR kids.
Aibo it must've been the mother that added or requested that clause...
Great that you have been open about this topic. Once we are able to openly and honestly speak about pertinenet issues, then the battle will surely be won. There are many issues with baby mammas, pappas, maintenance, and above all making sure that children know their parents and that their parents spend time with them.
sometimes people want to intellectualize everything, we are Africans. And in African culture there is something called inhlawulo( paying damages to the family of a woman you have impregnated) i do not hear anything about that in this video. Some families are very strict when it comes to that custom, which is why they have probably denied you access to your kids. Let this be an example to other men who think they can go around impregnating different women and leave them, there is surrogacy if you want nothing to do with the mother of your child after the child is born.
Eish pen my struggle is that the father hasn't seen his kid, yes he maintains her, barely but it makes me soo sad that he refuses to see his daughter.
I don't have access to my kid as well but i still pay 3k monthly and its my choice i hope one day the he understand because i want him to lack nothing, the battle to see him if for another day
They will never understand they have hate growing ....they must see u ,u must be there they should remember u fighting for them getting chased...please take it seriously....I don't like my mother because she gave up on us...kids dint wanna hear ur stories ...a memory of u fighting for them counts that ur money.
So Penuel you’re withholding the kids financial aid because you don’t have access to them?
The Children’s Act doesn’t say access to children should be withheld where the father is unable to financially provide for said child….
I stand with you Pen. I'm in the same situation. I'm a divorcee, loving father of two girls. The divorce was not my fault. I paid child maintenance and did many things. But for the last three months mommy decided that I should have access to my girls. I have no idea why. My heart is broken. I feel so sorry for them because I know that they love me
Those who prevent children from seeing a parent for no good reason - deprives children of everything father-ship stands for. They are accomplishes to an injustice to children.
I agree!
The repercussions of multiple baby mothers.
EXACTLY, YOU CANT EXPECT TO PLANT YOUR SEEDS EVERYWHERE AND EXPECT THING TO GO SMOOTHLY.
Stooooooop!! Ths judgements n bashing are exhausting. Pls just stop. No one plans to not have access to their kids even if it's with 20 diff mothers, so what?? Point here is a father u desperately wants to be a part of his kids lives. C'mon guys man...other men don't give 2 fucks about their seeds
Tholukuthi ur father also had "multiple baby mothers" come talk about repercussions here...be kinder than necessary pls
@@VAN_M57 its logical thinking to expect some things to not work out when you busy with multiple things at once, in his case 5 bms obvious ngeke kulunge yonke indawo, you guys are spiraling trying to justify his shitty behavior.
@@VAN_M57 nakhoke nama hypotheticals, what pen did was stupid and how he moved was stupid, manje sebayamu gila.
fathers please fight,i know the court route is discouraging but they work, gather all evidence, be patience, pray, dont give up
Your attire is beautiful and modest❤
Thank you, just the comment I was looking for. The Family and Children's court really, really work. I know.
You hurt people and then you advise them to go for counselling. Act right, it’s that simple. 🤣
Your problem is not having had been open with these poor women from the beginning. You love the idea of multiple partners and have not presented that from inception of the relationships you had with these women. Now you cry foul. These are the results of your actions. Be humble and try see this issue from the perspective these women. You wronged them. You used them to have an army of kids. These are your values. But you can't play with people like that. I'm glad that SA law deprives people like you to perpetually mess young women 's lives for satisfaction of your own ego.
Yet as mothers the when we withhold contact as a result of no maintenance the courts tell us that maintenance and visitation are not related. We’re forced to deal with narcissistic, financially abusive fathers who know they can abuse the courts system to absolve themselves of the responsibility to parent. This is a mans world. Forcing a child to have a relationship with an abusive financially and otherwise, is not in the best interests of the child. But the courts me.
Eish ths is also true...
Aybo, what are you talking about? Is it financial abuse because he has no money?
Selfish baby mommas who think for themselves,,who dont care about the wellbeing of the child
Bro you had an option to get married and start a family structure!!!! Every action has consequences
Im divorced I facing a similar problem.
@@PhillTholoI understand, Phil and sorry that you’re going through this, the issue at hand is multi faceted, however directed to Pan, literally he had everything in his power to stick to one baby mama
Do you know the horrors that children go through in the foster system including abuse of all types? Advocating for that shows that yiundont give a damn about those kids. It's your ego that's damaged and your need to settle scores. Nothing to do with those children
I won't engage the other nonsense you wrote, but I will say this: if my video additionally highlights a rot in the foster parenting system, then it needs to be investigated and fixed, so that kids don't suffer there unnecessarily.
EXACTLY.
@@Penuelism DAWG DONT STOP SUPPORTING YOUR KIDS, YOUR KIDS WILL GROW AND KNOW THE TRUTH. THESE SOCIAL MEDIA ANTICS AREN'T GOING TO HELP YOU IN NO WAY AND STOP HAVING KIDS, GET A VASECTOMY.
Imagine preferring foster Care over your child's mother just because you dont have access to your kids...your kids must be raised by strangers?? Yoh
This guy's giving khohlakele/cruel vibes...I feel like I'd also run away 😂 is not make sure...but none the less let kids spend time with their(mentally healthy) dads maan for the kids sake
It's funny how maridge the church and traditional communities have conflict resolution methods for such cases. But we chose to rather do our own thing then consult ancient wisdom.
Brother black pen you are not alone. I am also going through the same thing. the last time I saw my daughter was 2022 till to date I never saw her again. Her mother lives in soweto, I live in soweto but she took my child to limpopo
Fight for your parental rights and responsibilities, go to court. A friend of mine did, his daughter is with him as we speak and mommy knows that jail is where she's going if she deprives him of his rights towards his daughter.
Go to a family court and establish your rights as a biological father...they will assist
If u don't establish those rights they can't help u
Go to court , it's a criminal offense to take a child outside the province without the consent of the other parent
I just have a baby girl only 8 days old I pray to God even if me and the father don’t work out, I pray I can be able to separate him as a lover and him being a father
I pray I never use my daughter against him no matter what he does to me the only person that suffers is a child
A man is capable of being a bad lover and broke and still be a good father if the mother supports the relationship
Let’s try guys
IF you are a bad Lover you are equally a bad father.A abusive Lover or husbands is mirroring bad behavior to his children.Both roles are connected.A bad and abusive Wives,cant be an Loving Mother.
Congrats on ur week old blessing...may God grant u ur hearts desires about ur child. It's really tough out there 😪
@ thank you 🙏🏿 ❤️❤️❤️
Hope this situation gets better
I feel your pain Pen. I have the fight with my child's mother. Believe, this is such a hard journey to fight.
please dont make the same decision as him, keep fighting for those kids, they will know the truth themselves.
This is what happens when you have children with mutiple women
Not true....I do have one daughter, married and separate now...the mother denying me to see my daughter
Your big brother, i never had. Thanks for this one. im just like you I'm father of 5 and with different mothers ❤
The whole "in the best interest of the child" is an incomplete sentence in SA. It is actually "in the best interest of the child - as long as the mother agrees". Consenquences should be equal for all that break the law - not just men, but ke, here we are. Strength to all us brothers in this battle. Let's hope that things will get better (or somewhat fair) in our lifetime.
But it seems the scheme of children laws in SA is that if you are unmarried father, automatically mother become superior parent.
The only right recognised for the unmarried father is access and duty to support. And worse the two are not intertwined. Meaning even if mother says f*u , dont see child, duty still remains to support.
Sth must be done so that access and duty goes together.
I got this from google, i may be incorrect.
U are correct 😏
Nah bru majority of blacks families were raised by single moms & we not criminals as a result
Whatever issues you have with your other kids moms but u can't stop paying maintenance.
Musa ukudlala ndoda sibadala masingaka. Another thing a person who was once close to as those 2 ladies understand u as a person more than we do. Im sure each will have their reasons y they are acting this way.
We all have a part to play, as a wife I also encourage my husband to make time for his son. It’s not about monthly maintenance payments no no. Even now me and our 2 boys are home at my mothers and they are spending the holidays just the two of them. If we all work together we can win this battle
The path is challenging for men, and I empathize with the children. I've observed that many women often seek to penalize men by restricting their access to the kids or preventing them from playing significant roles in decisions that could impact the children's futures, such as choices related to schooling and living conditions.
It's really stupid of women to do this, I don't understand the logic behind ths. It damages the child more than the parents...yes if the fathers are abusive or not mentally fit or are addicts that way you're protecting the child but jus njeee nje to be spiteful aikhona
When it comes to GBV this country made sure that the abuse is only against women. Anything from a mans side is nt taken seriously. That is y they r willing to blacklist men only. Absolutely no punishment for women.
I think you should expose the mothers as well because if you were the one who was doing it they would've exposed you long time ago on social media.
If you withhold maintenance because of the problems referred to then just make sure that you put that amount into a savings account for the future
Absolutely not. The one refusing access to the father must save HER OWN money for the future. She chose to raise the kids ALONE without a father. Her kids don’t have a father right now according to her. So let her save money and raise them
He can’t afford to that, that’s why he doesn’t want to support, he’s broke
Bitter much@@sdonagmac2293
It's your obligation as a man to provide for your child. This generation of men are weaklings honestly. Whatever transpired between you and the mother has nothing to do with the child. Play your role I'm sure many of you were inconsistent fathers hence the mothers choosing the difficult role of being single mothers.
@TCN-d9q how will they play their role when the mothers are denying acess?
Pennuel , I tell you , you will talk till cows comes home. There are fathers like you looking after their kids. ,,,,,,,,but not all. I n the same breathe there are good baby mamas out there. Weaponising children against their fathers is so unfair, but it happens. W e probably need baby daddys like you to continue with such conversations. I m a woman by the way, but let us be grown ups , its time we listen to the other side equally. I f we allow such pain to continue unabated is not only dangerous but shows how lazy, UNCARING we are as a society have become. We should highlight problems as they UNFOLD. The revenge is scary!!!!!!! South Africa LETS WAKE UP.
i feel so sorry for those kids, hhayi bandla
He keeps doing this to convince himself
We stand with you brother✊!
Love & Light to you Penuel. The sun will shine in your direction one day for the love you have for your children 🤞Karma will deal with those ones ♻️
Nobody has a right to judge you on number of babies you have so feel free you know your self.
You give people the right to judge you the moment you choose to bring your dirty laundry to public platform.he should be seeking counseling and therapy,not public sympathy. Baby mamas also have their side of the story.
You know what, I get your struggles and points. I hope you'll eventually pay and see your children after hearing you out. Especially if you say it's only been 3 months.
I chose not to force child maintenance to force him out of my kids life, it’s been a year we are doing very well.
I hope my kids will be well developed by the time they need to deal with him again.
Eeeeyi I understand what u mean by ths...I was in a similar situation, I even told the social worker I'm happy if he doesn't pay maintenance coz then it means I get to heal without any triggers. I get my peace, I raise my daughter as a healthy mother. Yes financially it was gonna be tough but peace and healing first. The state decided otherwise for me 😢
@ peace is priceless. I wait for him to take me to court so I can claim the maintenance he awes me hehehe
He will not try
5 women just went on to have 7 kids for 1 man ... haaai shem 😂😂😂
Yeah it’s like Olympics or World Cup 😂
At this point we should hear all sides of the story, not one sided propaganda.
@@someoneelse1895 if already you’ve decided one is propaganda what’s there for us to think you will be sane enough to hear the other side, gaslighting one side to protect the side you haven’t hear in itself is problematic if you ask me.
Penuel I applaud you for publicly taking ownership of your situation and giving your side of the story. However my brother you are leading the single mother pandemic and have contributed immensely to it. What most men miss is that you cannot call yourself a father when you are not raising your children. Having visitation rights means that you get to live your carefree life and tap into “parenting” as and when it suits you. My child’s father lives in a different country and last saw our daughter when she was born, he video calls her on weekends and has built a connection with her, there is no way you can call this parenting. Being a parent requires you to be there for the day to day experiences, taking full responsibility of your kids. Be there for the meltdowns, the outbursts of joy over silly things…. as opposed to coming in for a day or a week, then calling yourself a father? You are not a father, you are just a sperm donor who is privileged to see how their kids turn out, let’s not undermine fatherhood!
Mate you blaming Lawyers,courts,the state, neighbours, reserve bank, pilots, employers, twitter and baby mamas for your reckless behaviour? 😅😅😅😅
5 baby mamas? You moving in the fast lane.
Five women were dumb enough to sleep with one man, but somehow the one man is the problem. Society is full of dumb fucks!
Monna di deng ebohloko. Ke qetetse ngwanka ale 5-6 years...ke sure ngwanaka osale boma 9-10 years noulas. The courts couldn't help me out, so lenna I stopped paying maintenence, why should I pay if I don't see my kid. Im not dumb and naive, I tried the traditional route, nothing. all i can say is that the mother of my child is EVIL. because nothing will ever justify her actions to deprive our kid to see me. and I know there's more men who are "ATM Dads" they don't see the kids, they just send money, I refuse that shit. Ke batla ho bona ngwana, hao hard can that be?? well in South Africa men have no rights to their kids.
What you did is right. You used your X account and your channel to talk about an issue that has plaqued South African Men. The bigger problem is society made up of toxic families which perpetuates this behavior. It's true most of these women, were raised by toxic mothers as well. It cuts deep!!! 💔
I never too Pen serious until after I learned about parenting issues. And I started to pay attention only to find uJita is smart, an alpha male who is not afraid of the truth. Salute kid
Same opening music like podcast and chill 😂
@@TheSouthAfricanPost 😂😂😂
This is more common than nuclear families. We really need to think long and hard, do you want children or the man? This feels like they wanted him, very spiteful. I hope the 2 mothers heal.❤
Kids will never understand that u send money every month they have hate growing ....they must see u ,u must be there they should remember u fighting for them getting chased...please take it seriously....I don't like my mother because she gave up on us...kids dint wanna hear ur stories ...a memory of u fighting for them counts that ur money..fighting means u showed up physically many times getting chased etc...u showed up using a mediator to see if they are ok etc...
This problem you having is not unique to you, millions of men and women around the world have the same problems.. .life goes on, mothers can leave , your expectation that they would remain in gauteng was naïve..again, its your problem, not theirs.. now, you want courts to move mountains for fathers?? it seems you are not aware of gbv, just the other day a father in kzn killed his 3 year old child and the mother.. so you cannot come here with those things that courts must move mountains so fathers see their kids.. most father who left their babies mommas are not good people, they are abusers in different ways.. school, food, cloths, etc is nothing less than 3k a month.. if u have 10 kids, your maintenance is minimum 30k a month.. before making all these kids, did you not think about these consequences ? then if u not paying, obviously the mothers are goin to make your life difficult, just pay baba..u made them, so pay, then deal with other issues after.. u cant go to court with dirty hands, meaning, u didnt pay maintenance, now you want the courts help.. at least be up to date when u go to court..its called the doctrine of clean hands.. now , love your kids, its clear, i dont think we doubt that, but their are other factors baba.. women dont think the way men think..so ya, take what i said anyway u like..your issue is you, after 2 baby mommas u never learnt your lesson, so you now reaping what u have sown..u cant excuse it by saying they were planed.. thats even worse, imagine after 6 kids u then plan no.7... lik wtf..you cannot be ok bro.. good luck.
The law fails everyone is all I can say. And the issue is that the failing did not start with the law, but with the people involved. This is what made things complicated. Social issues. Hard to half solve issues
Guys who go to court and lie are the ones who ruin this for men who are serious about being present fathers. My baby daddy even got people from that state family advocates office to call me, coerce and threaten me into doing what my baby daddy wants. Luckily i recorded the phone calls. They lied about a file being opened against me at the childrens court claiming that i am denying him access. I went to children's court to find out what is going on, i find out that the file was opened the day before i went to enquire about this file yet people from the advocate's office had harassed me weeks. And i had proof that my baby daddy was lying. Sorry that you are going through this.
@@DRMogwasi I'm proud of you for keeping all the evidence 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
It helped a lot. I was advised to create a parental plan in order to protect myself from such claims. I really don't get why with you things are so complicated. But hey, all the best.
Damn! Its kinda ironic how in a country of so many fatherless children u find urself in this unfair predicament! I almost went through the same thing but lucky for me she snapped out of it quick and realised that i was needed in my boys' lives.
Pay maintenance and stop being a coward!
I believe you did listen to the whole clip and also understand or have never been in that situation. You are telling me that those fathers who are not working must be denied access to their children's. Penuel is fighting for access to his children here, not to support them
Some men just choose not to see their children coz they dont want to take care of them ..they mix yr separation with the child..
Damn you make the tabloid?? Crazy... or guess not it makes sense I'm just not used to yt/socials having reach
Yondla ndoda
Pen, your Twitter account has blocked me. Not sure why. I don't know you personally and believe I have never sent you anything offensive. I was to follow. Is there a particular reason I'm blocked?
@@muzih.ngwenya9768 I'm not sure, Muzih. Please send me your handle.
@Penuelism @muzi2104
@Penuelism @muzi2104 bafo
So you made 5 women single mothers...wow
Reading some of the comments I suspect your baby has just commented here🤔, they simply won't listen 😅🤣😂
Pen,i here your cry here.what i hink you need to do on the situation. Ask all ofthem to marry them.just marry there no love involve.you will get chance to have all your children together with their mothers. You will solve the situationn that your having.
I wrote you an e mail they said it's truncated I don't know why or what it means but I was relating my story on baby daddy and baby mama.
🤜🏾🤛🏾
Lets we for baby mamas to reply
😂😂😂
bitter baby mama right?🤣