I tried alcohol in my youth and absolutely hated the taste. Beer smelled like old urine, and other liquor tasted awful. If people ask, I tell them because it tastes like shit. They end the discussion there. All my adult life I've been a non-drinker and I love that I can safely drive home after a party, that I can remember the whole evening, and that I don't become someone else's responsibility by passing out. Still had tons of fun being sober!
Honestly as someone who does drink (and quite a bit, I have about 2-4 units a day Thursday-Sunday when I’m at Larp), I don’t get how people think that at all. Drunk people aren’t really fun to be around. Tipsy people can be - I like I being around my parents and their friends when they’re a bit tipsy at Larp - but that’s just because being tipsy lowers the humour bar for some people, and makes everything funnier. It’s much more fun to be sober, and honestly the thought of being drunk has always scared me. That loss of control sounds terrifying, not fun. People who think you can unit have fun if you drink have other unresolved issues, seriously. Every person I’ve met like that was in desperate need of therapy.
Well, at least everyone else is on ops side. I also find it interesting how everyone was so quick to turn on the sil, which implies that this isn’t the first time she’s pulled crap like this.
Exactly what I thought. She must have been a complete pos for a long time to make even her direct family, and even her own friends, instantly turn on her.
It's not even implied, it's directly stated in the story. OP refrained from providing examples of said behavior due to them being very personal stories of her husband's family. She did say that they dealt with a lot of crap from SIL in the past, which resulted in several arguments and low contacts over the years. At the time of the story, they were in the process of rebuilding things
Why do people call this type of behavior a prank? There is nothing funny about 99% of the "pranks" but that last 1% can be outright dangerous. Stop accepting this defence of stupidity and call it out for what it is, dangerous!
Yup. For all the SIL knew OP might have been de*thly allergic to alcohol, and she still decided it was a great idea to spike her drink. What an absolute evil pos.
That’s a very upsetting situation, especially when trust is involved in family gatherings. Pranks can be fun, but they should never cross boundaries or make someone feel uncomfortable. I hope you were able to address it and set clear boundaries moving forward.
OP's SIL and SIL's friends clearly never matured past the Mean Girl phase they were in during High School. While I do hope SIL can change and grow, it'll be up to her to want to change. Unfortunately, that will require pain first. Maybe the pain of having her entire close family go low/no contact will be enough pain to change but whom can say.
People like the sil never change. I grew up in a family full of them. I went no contact 2 years ago because I realized they wouldn't ever stop hurting me. They knew they were hurting me and did it on purpose to control my behavior. That realization hurt, but it also allowed me to start healing.
The very worst “pranks” are those targeted at a weakness or vulnerability of the victim for the amusement of others. It’s actually a betrayal of multiple trusts and the creatures that do this are revealing themselves fully.
SIL doesn't understand consequences and boundaries, she needs to learn. She committed a crime and admitted to it and laughed. Call the cops, file criminal charges. Get a lawyer, and sue her. And don't feel bad about it. She's not family. Family looks out for and cares about each other.
This is the most adult reaction possible to any of these stories. Bravo for the husband and his family. OP did the right thing all the time, and SIL needs to learn how to be around people and respect them…
As someone who was raised by a functional alcoholic father and a narsasistic mother i feel for you so much. What some people might not understand is that the smell and taste of alcohol can trigger flashbacks. No one knew why you don't drink, you could have been in recovery and she just ruined it, or like it was in this case it could have been associated with trauma. Maybe you had religions or personal beliefs that make you not want to drink. Most people who don't drink have a profound personal reason for it. She had no right. Then after all that she doubled down and insulted you. Wtf.
My ex-husband had a grandfather who was an alcoholic (though they had a good relationship), and I was always so proud of the way that, whatever life threw at him, he absolutely refused to fall into that trap. All the best to OP - that is a truly nasty thing to do to someone. I mean, all right, so SIL never got (neither was she owed) a full explanation, but still. If somebody doesn't drink or whatever, they don't. End of story.
My mom was a strict teetotaler plus I attended a Baptist college then married a seminarian. So I didn't have alcohol until after my divorce. I didn't care for the taste, except for champagne. Then, one New Years Eve, I drank the equivalent to an entire bottle of champagne and, on the way home, I tried to exit a car doing 50 mph. I was only saved by my friend clinging to my arm until she could stop the car and seatbelt me in safely. I'm now 66 and only have a drink every year or two.
Technically that was an assault and OP could go to the Police about it, though going through the legal system would be traumatic so I would not advise that. Hubby and other In-Laws are awesome! My reaction would not be to try to reason with the B. I would tell her to grow up and get out of my life. OP's husband is probably relieved to stop interacting with such a toxic person.
I have far too many alcoholics in my family so I made the choice not to drink long before I became an adult. I completely understand being triggered by people being drunk and being surrounded by alcohol at events. It's not something I feel comfortable around and everyone in my family knows this. I don't know that there would be any coming back from this with me.
What a sad prick to insult OP after crossing her boundaries, how hard is it to not do what someone asks you not to? Lashing out cause she got told off is exactly right, self centered cause 'if my bullying target hadnt said anything, none of this wouldve happened'.
My kid’s father and both his parents are alcoholics. I shared with her fairly early some statistics about how much higher the probability of her becoming one was and how it was better if she just never even tried alcohol--why even risk it? I was livid when she returned from a visitation at a single-digit age and found that her grandfather had thought it was “cute” to have shared his “toddy” with her. (180 proof rum and coke.) It was NOT cute.
She’s lucky you didn’t call the police. At least where I’m from, drink/food tampering is illegal, especially with some sort of intoxicating/deadly substance.
I'm guessing SIL thought OP was just some religious maniac or trying to be superior by not drinking so she slipped her alcohol. Still, laughing in someone's face is mean if the target doesn't laugh.
She knows what orange juice tastes like and knew the SIL was serving mimosas. It is not hard to figure out that there was champagne in her OJ when it tasted funny.
I don't blame you for being mad, but you're a Drama-Queen. There is NO reason you were traumatized over taking not even a sip of champagne. If taking a sip of champagne is going to sentmd you to therapy, then you need to be in an institution. Also, the animation on these stories makes NO sense.
Just a little sip sure they let that slide next she'll be spiking her drinks with even more hardcore stuff since "just a sip isn't a big deal" Your forgetting the fact that the SIL has done more shitty stuff that listing it all was impossible for the original poster and that everyone else sided with her over the SIL just tells you what kind of person the SIL was and that cutting contact was a long time coming
Yeah, I have a very surface level understanding of laws, but I’m pretty sure that drink spiking (which also includes alcohol) is a felony though the degree depends on the state the occurrence happened in I believe
SIL is the kind of person who will try to give peanuts to the allergic guy just for fun.
I dont drink either, but some people just cant understand how you can have fun without being a drinker.
Same
I tried alcohol in my youth and absolutely hated the taste. Beer smelled like old urine, and other liquor tasted awful. If people ask, I tell them because it tastes like shit. They end the discussion there. All my adult life I've been a non-drinker and I love that I can safely drive home after a party, that I can remember the whole evening, and that I don't become someone else's responsibility by passing out. Still had tons of fun being sober!
Honestly as someone who does drink (and quite a bit, I have about 2-4 units a day Thursday-Sunday when I’m at Larp), I don’t get how people think that at all. Drunk people aren’t really fun to be around. Tipsy people can be - I like I being around my parents and their friends when they’re a bit tipsy at Larp - but that’s just because being tipsy lowers the humour bar for some people, and makes everything funnier. It’s much more fun to be sober, and honestly the thought of being drunk has always scared me. That loss of control sounds terrifying, not fun.
People who think you can unit have fun if you drink have other unresolved issues, seriously. Every person I’ve met like that was in desperate need of therapy.
Well, at least everyone else is on ops side. I also find it interesting how everyone was so quick to turn on the sil, which implies that this isn’t the first time she’s pulled crap like this.
Exactly what I thought. She must have been a complete pos for a long time to make even her direct family, and even her own friends, instantly turn on her.
It's not even implied, it's directly stated in the story. OP refrained from providing examples of said behavior due to them being very personal stories of her husband's family. She did say that they dealt with a lot of crap from SIL in the past, which resulted in several arguments and low contacts over the years. At the time of the story, they were in the process of rebuilding things
Why do people call this type of behavior a prank? There is nothing funny about 99% of the "pranks" but that last 1% can be outright dangerous. Stop accepting this defence of stupidity and call it out for what it is, dangerous!
@@pegitamg9716 I agree. It’s only a prank if it doesn’t put anyone in danger and the target finds it funny too. Otherwise it’s just bullying.
A prank is filling someone's car up with balloons on their birthday. This was more like an assault; like you said, dangerous.
Yup. For all the SIL knew OP might have been de*thly allergic to alcohol, and she still decided it was a great idea to spike her drink. What an absolute evil pos.
This is why folks are tired of pranksters and don’t like them. They have trouble drawing the line between prank and criminal offences.
That’s a very upsetting situation, especially when trust is involved in family gatherings. Pranks can be fun, but they should never cross boundaries or make someone feel uncomfortable. I hope you were able to address it and set clear boundaries moving forward.
I deeply appreciate that this was a short, to the point story (plus in update) that was completed in one video.
OP's SIL and SIL's friends clearly never matured past the Mean Girl phase they were in during High School. While I do hope SIL can change and grow, it'll be up to her to want to change. Unfortunately, that will require pain first. Maybe the pain of having her entire close family go low/no contact will be enough pain to change but whom can say.
People like the sil never change. I grew up in a family full of them. I went no contact 2 years ago because I realized they wouldn't ever stop hurting me. They knew they were hurting me and did it on purpose to control my behavior. That realization hurt, but it also allowed me to start healing.
Not only is she highly unlikely to ever change, in her mind it will be OP’s “fault” that her family turned on her.
The very worst “pranks” are those targeted at a weakness or vulnerability of the victim for the amusement of others. It’s actually a betrayal of multiple trusts and the creatures that do this are revealing themselves fully.
SIL doesn't understand consequences and boundaries, she needs to learn. She committed a crime and admitted to it and laughed. Call the cops, file criminal charges. Get a lawyer, and sue her. And don't feel bad about it. She's not family. Family looks out for and cares about each other.
This is the most adult reaction possible to any of these stories. Bravo for the husband and his family. OP did the right thing all the time, and SIL needs to learn how to be around people and respect them…
This isn't a prank, legally it's an assault!
As someone who was raised by a functional alcoholic father and a narsasistic mother i feel for you so much. What some people might not understand is that the smell and taste of alcohol can trigger flashbacks. No one knew why you don't drink, you could have been in recovery and she just ruined it, or like it was in this case it could have been associated with trauma. Maybe you had religions or personal beliefs that make you not want to drink. Most people who don't drink have a profound personal reason for it. She had no right. Then after all that she doubled down and insulted you. Wtf.
I'm pretty sure some medications don't react well with alcohol, also
@billb7114 that too... its risky irresponsible behavior. Some people are even allergic to alcahol and will have a reaction.
Yeah, I am on medication that means I cannot have alcohol. @billb7114
My ex-husband had a grandfather who was an alcoholic (though they had a good relationship), and I was always so proud of the way that, whatever life threw at him, he absolutely refused to fall into that trap. All the best to OP - that is a truly nasty thing to do to someone. I mean, all right, so SIL never got (neither was she owed) a full explanation, but still. If somebody doesn't drink or whatever, they don't. End of story.
My mom was a strict teetotaler plus I attended a Baptist college then married a seminarian. So I didn't have alcohol until after my divorce. I didn't care for the taste, except for champagne. Then, one New Years Eve, I drank the equivalent to an entire bottle of champagne and, on the way home, I tried to exit a car doing 50 mph. I was only saved by my friend clinging to my arm until she could stop the car and seatbelt me in safely.
I'm now 66 and only have a drink every year or two.
A good prank makes the target feel foolish, _not_ threatened. They should be left thinking "God dammit, I'm an idiot" and not "I feel unsafe".
Confuse, don't abuse. The best pranks involve all parties laughing hysterically at the end.
Yeah good prank would be giving her mango juice so she's confused (provided she has no mango allergy)
If someone says they don’t drink, respect that. Do not spike their drink as a “prank.” Spiking someone’s drink is illegal, by the way.
Madam Scutworth needs a few decades away from family to learn empathy & consideration.
Technically that was an assault and OP could go to the Police about it, though going through the legal system would be traumatic so I would not advise that. Hubby and other In-Laws are awesome! My reaction would not be to try to reason with the B. I would tell her to grow up and get out of my life. OP's husband is probably relieved to stop interacting with such a toxic person.
I have far too many alcoholics in my family so I made the choice not to drink long before I became an adult. I completely understand being triggered by people being drunk and being surrounded by alcohol at events. It's not something I feel comfortable around and everyone in my family knows this. I don't know that there would be any coming back from this with me.
I could never be an alcoholic, I act like a buffoon when I'm drunk. Mosty fun, but when I get upset, I make bad decisions.
That is NOT a prank 😡😡 that’s disgusting
If your husband and SIL go NC, it would not be because of you but because of her and her malice.
Wow that was quite the ride.
What a sad prick to insult OP after crossing her boundaries, how hard is it to not do what someone asks you not to? Lashing out cause she got told off is exactly right, self centered cause 'if my bullying target hadnt said anything, none of this wouldve happened'.
Shout-out to my friend group where everyone can drink (or not drink) whatever they want, without anyone making a huge deal out of it ❤
My kid’s father and both his parents are alcoholics. I shared with her fairly early some statistics about how much higher the probability of her becoming one was and how it was better if she just never even tried alcohol--why even risk it? I was livid when she returned from a visitation at a single-digit age and found that her grandfather had thought it was “cute” to have shared his “toddy” with her. (180 proof rum and coke.) It was NOT cute.
That can take away any parental rights he has. Please sue him
What SIL was below the belt when she said those things, it was insensitive, cruel and mean
She’s lucky you didn’t call the police. At least where I’m from, drink/food tampering is illegal, especially with some sort of intoxicating/deadly substance.
I wpuldnt be telling your sil anything about your past, she will twist it and spread it around and use it against you.
I'm guessing SIL thought OP was just some religious maniac or trying to be superior by not drinking so she slipped her alcohol. Still, laughing in someone's face is mean if the target doesn't laugh.
how does she know what champagne tastes like?
She knows what orange juice tastes like and knew the SIL was serving mimosas. It is not hard to figure out that there was champagne in her OJ when it tasted funny.
Ok 👌
SIL is an asshole, but op is not better. she is overreacting/drama queen..
I don't blame you for being mad, but you're a Drama-Queen. There is NO reason you were traumatized over taking not even a sip of champagne.
If taking a sip of champagne is going to sentmd you to therapy, then you need to be in an institution.
Also, the animation on these stories makes NO sense.
IDIOT comment of the day. Your parents must be so proud.
Just a little sip sure they let that slide next she'll be spiking her drinks with even more hardcore stuff since "just a sip isn't a big deal"
Your forgetting the fact that the SIL has done more shitty stuff that listing it all was impossible for the original poster and that everyone else sided with her over the SIL just tells you what kind of person the SIL was and that cutting contact was a long time coming
Pretty sure that's illegal, btw 🫥
Yeah, I have a very surface level understanding of laws, but I’m pretty sure that drink spiking (which also includes alcohol) is a felony though the degree depends on the state the occurrence happened in I believe
@@trashotakuassault in most places, based on another comment.