Guy comes home to his wife with a sheep under his arm and says “This is the pig I was f#*king when you weren’t around”. His wife says, “That’s not a pig, that’s a sheep.” He says, “I wasn’t talking to you.”
Was not missed by all. Only the weak and feeble minded. One can't help but wonder how long it will take before we see nessy doing the arrmys in your sleeveees gag. Keep up the smashing work chaps. Jolly good show if I may say so
Two guys are walking down the street and see a dog cleaning himself. One guy says, "Man! I wish I could do that!" The other guy replies, "Don't you think you should pet him first?"
Little Red Riding Hood was coming to her Grandma's house when she heard moaning and screaming coming from within. Fearing the worst, she burst into the room to see the Big Bad wolf crouched before her. "Grandma!" she cries out in despair as her Grandmother pops her head up to look at her. "What is it, child?!" she asks peevishly "I... I thought the Big Bad wolf was eating you!" Red cries out. "Well he was... until you barged in here!"
Old man lying on his death bed, when all of a sudden the grim reaper bursts in through the door. Shocked, the old man starts bargaining for his life. What about a game of chess for my life? No! Snarled death How about a drinking contest then? No! Snarled death again. Fine, what about a pillow fight? Death ponders this for a second, "alright, as long as your ready for the reaper cushions.
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm One windmill ask the other, "whats your favorite type of music?" The other fan answers, "I'm a huge metal fan!"
I loved this video. I haven't been watching recent videos bc I'm tired of the same ark and 7days video (if it was more then u guys playing the game id prolly come back i.e. witting a story or something example: subnatica or outer wilds). I really am happy to see new stuff like this or among us. please keep this creative streak going. I desperately want to be a fan again.
Cleanest dirty joke you'll ever hear. Guy comes home from work and says "Honey I'm Home. Suddenly he sees his wife sliding down the banister. She gets to the bottom, jumps off, gives him a kiss, and says "Hi honey." and runs back up stairs. He thinks to himself, a little weird but whatever. He starts to hang up his coat when he sees his wife sliding down the banister again. She jumps off, gives him another big kiss, and runs back upstairs. He gets his coat hung up and here she comes, sliding down the banister again. She jumps off, kisses him again and runs back upstairs. He is perplexed and asks, "Honey, what are you doing?" as she is throwing her leg over the banister AGAIN. She slides down to the bottom, jumps off, gives him another big kiss, and says. "I'm heating up dinner!"
I got a joke for you... A Kung Fu student asks his teacher: "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers: "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun, and their wings seeming like flames?" "Yes, my master, I have." "And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?" "Yes, my master, I have witnessed it." "And the moon... when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?" "Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon." "That is the problem." His teacher tells him "You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
A rabbit and a bear are taking a crap in the woods. The bear asks the rabbit "Do you ever get shit stuck to your fur?". The rabbit says "No". So, the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit
Really appreciate these funny videos. Really helps deal with this insane cold hitting the Kansas City area that has our pipes bursting, and water freezing up. Hope everyone's staying warm and safe.
I'm from Central PA. I've done stand up a few times at a comedy club in Harrisburg. It's a lot of fun. Dad jokes usually don't work to well, unless you have the personality for it I guess. Bit I'm such a huge fan of them. I think they're fuckin hysterical. Amy chance I get to learn some new ones, I take. 😅😅 Thanks for the vid!
@neebsgaming These are great. I can't tell how much joy your channel has brought to my family. My husband and teenagers absolutely love your "Among Us" series. We have made it a family time thing lol, silly i know.. but it works for us. Just wanted to say thank you for bring our little family 20 mins of family time Joy every week.
Wife went into labor, there was no time for an Ambulance so they jumped in the car and raced to the hospital. Half way there she yelled "There's no time, the baby is coming now" So the father pulled over & had to delivery the baby on the back seat, on the side of the road. It went so well the mother let the father name their baby boy. He named him Carson.
Love the dad jokes lol I got 2 more for y'all. 1 .Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up. 2.What did the Ranch say when someone opened the refrigerator door? "Close the door, I'm dressing!" Keep up the great job guys love all the videos and dad jokes 🍻👍
Dad jokes: What do you call a Rabbit with fleas? - Bugs Bunny What did one tonsil say to the other? - Get dressed, the Doctor is taking us out How does a giraffe order a round for the house? - Hey guys, the high Balls are on me!
Hey Neebs Crew! Whether or not you see this, I just wanted to let you guys know that I appreciate your hard work in keeping this channel going. I am an electrical apprentice and I have a very busy job in the city at the moment. And because I'm the new guy, I'm constantly being asked to do a whole bunch of stuff and seen as a delivery girl sometimes. But one thing that helps me get through the day is listening to Neebscast or Subnautica. You guys rock!! Here's to three more years of that program and more Neebs! Thank you!! ❤️
Guy comes home to his wife with a sheep under his arm and says “This is the pig I was f#*king when you weren’t around”. His wife says, “That’s not a pig, that’s a sheep.” He says, “I wasn’t talking to you.”
I feel like this is a joke Appsro will love lol
BISH... nooo...so wrong lol
@@danielk3612 Especially after the divorce lol
Bomb dropped
🤣
You know Neebs, I appreciated your wit with the "coralation" quip, even if no one else did. Bravo
This singer really appreciated the Choral Society joke
That was a good one
I threw away my soda can in shock that no one appreciated it wtf
Was not missed by all. Only the weak and feeble minded. One can't help but wonder how long it will take before we see nessy doing the arrmys in your sleeveees gag. Keep up the smashing work chaps. Jolly good show if I may say so
That _totally_ deserved some high 5s!!
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have H2O." The second one says, "I'll have H2O too." He did not survive.
Pretty heavy joke.
This one is my favorite.
ooof...
@@schrodingersgat4344 ahhhhh
Science
I gave my dad his 50th Birthday card today, he said one would have been enough.
Pretty good.
Oh boy. That one fits as a new fifty year old.
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
Why don't blind people like to go skydiving?
Cause it scares the shit out of their dog!
that gave me a decent chuckle
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
It took a long, long time, but once their numbers had dwindled from 40 down to 8, the dwarves began to suspect Hungry.
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
Two guys are walking down the street and see a dog cleaning himself. One guy says, "Man! I wish I could do that!"
The other guy replies, "Don't you think you should pet him first?"
That's totally another Appsro joke for sure!
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
My joke
I love the way the Earth rotates, it really makes my day
I like the accuracy of rotate instead of orbit nice
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
BRING THESE BACK AND BRIBG BACK HOW DOES “x” DIE
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
I was more focused on the fact that doraleous won the match in the background by hiding
Me: Isn't this great
Wife: Not really
Me: (leans down from top bunk) Whats wrong?
Lol
This one was really good lol
@@godsm3dic577 lol the other day I went to buy some camo trousers but couldn't find any
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
A guy asks his buddy how his new business selling glass coffins has been going. "Eh, remains to be seen."
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
The picture with simon on front of this cracked me up already lol
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
That intro brings back a lot of good memories on this channel!
OooOooOooOoOOOooh!
I know! Epic!
Right! I've been rewatching all their old stuff the past few days. I really miss the death quizzes
Didn't realize it was gone till now
@@edubblesspirit I like your name. Great man, great music.
We need more funny amazon reviews !
Yes! That's way better than these lame joke videos.
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
HDMI
"FUNNYYYYYYYYYYY JOKE!"
We should really find a reason to do something with them someday.
It was the "display port am I" part that got me haha
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
Little Red Riding Hood was coming to her Grandma's house when she heard moaning and screaming coming from within. Fearing the worst, she burst into the room to see the Big Bad wolf crouched before her.
"Grandma!" she cries out in despair as her Grandmother pops her head up to look at her.
"What is it, child?!" she asks peevishly
"I... I thought the Big Bad wolf was eating you!" Red cries out.
"Well he was... until you barged in here!"
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
After meditation the young wolf had changed... he was now aware wolf.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent
They said that last episode
They actually said it in two episodes lol
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
Lizard, lizard, lizard.....
Is there a gecko in here.
Ill see myself out 🤣
3:00 I have to pause this to say There's A Picture Of COOTER Behind The Bar!!!
I was upset, and my friend told me, "Cheer up. You could be a hole in the ground filled with water."
I knew he meant well.
A sheep, a drum and a snake falls of a cliff. Baa, dum, tsss.
Old man lying on his death bed, when all of a sudden the grim reaper bursts in through the door.
Shocked, the old man starts bargaining for his life.
What about a game of chess for my life?
No! Snarled death
How about a drinking contest then?
No! Snarled death again.
Fine, what about a pillow fight?
Death ponders this for a second, "alright, as long as your ready for the reaper cushions.
I LOVE THESE!!
Please continue doing these videos, such great change of pace, and so fun.
Thank you for acknowledging the armadillo thing. You'd be surprised (or perhaps not) at the number of people who would try it just to test it.
The temperature thing with crocodiles is true for a lot of reptiles, bearded dragons are another example
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm
One windmill ask the other, "whats your favorite type of music?"
The other fan answers, "I'm a huge metal fan!"
Do you remember the first time you rode in an elevator?
I do, it really lifted my spirits but the second time really let me down.
So you were carrying beverages, I see
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
I loved this video. I haven't been watching recent videos bc I'm tired of the same ark and 7days video (if it was more then u guys playing the game id prolly come back i.e. witting a story or something example: subnatica or outer wilds). I really am happy to see new stuff like this or among us. please keep this creative streak going. I desperately want to be a fan again.
Omg guys this takes me back to your older vids. NICE!!!
Please make more of these they bring such a smile to my face
Cleanest dirty joke you'll ever hear.
Guy comes home from work and says "Honey I'm Home.
Suddenly he sees his wife sliding down the banister. She gets to the bottom, jumps off, gives him a kiss, and says "Hi honey." and runs back up stairs.
He thinks to himself, a little weird but whatever. He starts to hang up his coat when he sees his wife sliding down the banister again.
She jumps off, gives him another big kiss, and runs back upstairs.
He gets his coat hung up and here she comes, sliding down the banister again. She jumps off, kisses him again and runs back upstairs.
He is perplexed and asks, "Honey, what are you doing?" as she is throwing her leg over the banister AGAIN.
She slides down to the bottom, jumps off, gives him another big kiss, and says. "I'm heating up dinner!"
So your telling me that armadillo shells aren’t bulletproof now after I already told all my friends that they are
There has been a dude that shot an armadillo and the bullet ricochet and killed him.
bullet resistant might be a better term. I'd say low caliber bullets would ricochet pretty easy with an indirect shot.
The bite outta simons afro 😂 pure gold.....
I got a joke for you...
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher: "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated."
And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers: "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun, and their wings seeming like flames?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon... when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon."
"That is the problem." His teacher tells him "You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
my favorite Rodney joke
"I get no respect around here - the other day i got booed by a peeping tom"
After rewatching your old joke videos this appears and Im loving it!
I love these videos from you guys. Bring back videos like the dream facts and penis facts and random stuff back in the bf4 days. I loved those
Another "fun fact" about armadillos, While they may be near impervious to a downward blow they are quite vulnerable to the leg sweep.
A rabbit and a bear are taking a crap in the woods. The bear asks the rabbit "Do you ever get shit stuck to your fur?". The rabbit says "No". So, the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit
First time I heard that joke was Gilbert Godfried
Sometimes I wake up grumpy, sometimes I let her sleep in.
The nessy painting in the bar caught me so off guard
What kind of underwear do clouds wear?
Thunderwear!!!!
Love the fact you guys bought the joke series back I watched the other ones way too much.
What do you call a fast zombie?
A ZOOMbie
Really appreciate these funny videos. Really helps deal with this insane cold hitting the Kansas City area that has our pipes bursting, and water freezing up. Hope everyone's staying warm and safe.
Brilliant, loved the Dad jokes too but I guess I'm old enough to qualify :)
4:28 Props to the artist who nailed the onomatopoeia for *Ernie's* laughter!
_"Kekekekeke"_
My favorite joke:
Two blondes walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
I Love that Nessie got a feature! Now, THAT'S a true fan :)
That was amazing! xD Shit like this is so much fun to do.
Lol. Appsro. “I don’t get it.” And I would have figured you’d be the one to naturally crack up from Washington joke.
Thanks for the laughter fellas.
I'm from Central PA. I've done stand up a few times at a comedy club in Harrisburg. It's a lot of fun. Dad jokes usually don't work to well, unless you have the personality for it I guess. Bit I'm such a huge fan of them. I think they're fuckin hysterical. Amy chance I get to learn some new ones, I take. 😅😅 Thanks for the vid!
@neebsgaming These are great. I can't tell how much joy your channel has brought to my family. My husband and teenagers absolutely love your "Among Us" series. We have made it a family time thing lol, silly i know.. but it works for us. Just wanted to say thank you for bring our little family 20 mins of family time Joy every week.
I'm in the middle of a snow storm right now and this made my day😂😂
THESE are the videos we need more of!
What did the doe deer say as she was leaving the forest?... I'll never do that for two Bucks again!
Here's another.
Three deer are in the woods and one is crying.
Deer 1: Hey what's wrong with Earl.
Deer 2: His wife went to Vegas and blew fifty Bucks
ua-cam.com/video/Jk4utbVpwWA/v-deo.html
These guys just crack me up! Definitely a serious batch of dad jokes!
Have heard every joke on that list already unfortunately - but always glad to hear you guys banter 😁
Wife went into labor, there was no time for an Ambulance so they jumped in the car and raced to the hospital.
Half way there she yelled "There's no time, the baby is coming now"
So the father pulled over & had to delivery the baby on the back seat, on the side of the road.
It went so well the mother let the father name their baby boy. He named him Carson.
Dumb 😂😂
@@deadly_doll I know lol
What is the most extreme kind of holiday? Camping, it's in tents. I told my wife that joke every day for a week. It didn't get any funnier apparently.
I love the burgeoning friendship between Neebs gaming and Glock9. Also the Simons on G9's island.
Love the dad jokes lol I got 2 more for y'all.
1 .Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up.
2.What did the Ranch say when someone opened the refrigerator door? "Close the door, I'm dressing!"
Keep up the great job guys love all the videos and dad jokes 🍻👍
I'm a professional painter of 12 years . Paints in fact do smell different , they also burn your eyeballs in different ways . Glad I could help lol.
I’m glad that this series is back 🤩🤩
im colour blind and that blue/purple joke was brilliant, and I am definitely stealing that
Two nuns in a bath one says "where's the soap?" The other replies "yeah, it does doesn't it!"
Bringing back the OG intro! Miss it!
Dad jokes:
What do you call a Rabbit with fleas?
- Bugs Bunny
What did one tonsil say to the other?
- Get dressed, the Doctor is taking us out
How does a giraffe order a round for the house?
- Hey guys, the high Balls are on me!
Omg that sore tooth one. Jaw dropped.
I've been watching this channel for so long now I started with scrap mechanic awhile ago
Hank and jed vet here
Yea I started with BFF
Go watch "toontown" free on UA-cam with ads though
I’ve been watching y’all for a long time and Simon is amazing always not knowing what to do but love you guys
When I got to the last joke, I was laughing so hard at the fact that Dora saved that one for last. Absolutely killer jokes from the community
As one member of the Lutrinae subfamily said to another
'these guys otter be locked up for this.'
Ok the condom how was funny lol I was getting worried for a second there lol
Did you know some alligators can grow up to fifteen feet? But most only have four...
What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?
Synonym buns.
My favourite is the Burt and Ernie joke. Good laugh.
When it's Neebs Gaming, I like the video as soon as it opens. No point delaying the inevitable.
God I've missed this series so much, im glad its making a return
cheers Adahop the yoda joke killed me
Dude I love this series already
Where do bees go to the bathroom?
The BP station
Hearing jokes from neebs gaming, spectacular. Watching Dora RpG and crawl his way to a win, priceless.
Literally LOL! Thanks for cheering up my day, guys!
I feel like its 2015 again! I loved this series back in the day
What did Clinton do with his first fifty-cent piece?
He MARRIED her !
BWAHAHAHA
Hey Neebs Crew! Whether or not you see this, I just wanted to let you guys know that I appreciate your hard work in keeping this channel going. I am an electrical apprentice and I have a very busy job in the city at the moment. And because I'm the new guy, I'm constantly being asked to do a whole bunch of stuff and seen as a delivery girl sometimes. But one thing that helps me get through the day is listening to Neebscast or Subnautica. You guys rock!! Here's to three more years of that program and more Neebs! Thank you!! ❤️
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin all day.
I love the smell of Neebs in the morning. *sips coffee* ☕
Love that they are bringing this back
8:45 nobody even acknowledged Neebs' pun, corrallation. I acknowledge it. I enjoyed it.
My comment didn’t show up but I checked the be the first viewer on a Neebs Gaming video off my bucket list, love your work!
Finally an OG neebs gaming vid!
Ha. Loved the coral fact. Yes neebs, its definitely a coralation.
I missed these kind of videos
God, these were even worse than the first run. And I FUCKING love it!
I don’t tell my dad jokes often....... but when I do he laughs 😂😂😂
What sound does a bouncy 747 make?
Boeing....boeing... Boeing