@@christianRafaelCasti Hi friend! No I wouldn’t. My instinct tells me that lying is wrong. As for chastity, the dogmatic (un-questioning) insistence on chastity has been a source of much neurosis for many people. To me it makes more sense for each individual to try it out for themselves whether they prefer to be chaste or have a more relaxed attitude about sex. Nothing horrible will happen, as long as you’re careful (about STD’s etc.) You won’t go to hell. I see it as a matter of preference discovered through experimentation.
Haven’t watched this yet but what a round of applause this woman deserves for being so bold and transparent on a subject surrounded by such profound shame. U rock
Definitely! If only most women were open and honest about thier pornography obsession as she is. What a wonderful world that would be. Watching from London UK 🇬🇧
When she said that women have an identity crisis. I really felt that as a teen. I thought I might be lesbian. Thank God I never acted on anything. I’m happily married, and neither my husband or I are ever tempted to watch porn anymore
Same thing for me! I am still struggling with my identity, but something always held me back from ever acting on these feelings and I know that it was God!
I think women who struggle with lust is kept more hidden or underground especially as a Catholic woman. After watching this I am aware of the different ways I too have sinned. Thank you Rachel, please continue because society is not addressing how women struggle with this.
I think women struggling with lust are seen as "trashy." I would be more open with my struggle with lust but I fear being seen as a whore, slut, or easy. Lust is supposed to be a man's problem.
Society really hasn’t for the past 15 years and it’s been incredibly frustrating. Everything is geared toward men and their addictions, why not us too?
I thank The Lord I was never addicted to porn or found it appeasing. My heart goes out to everyone who is addicted or over coming their addiction. You're in my prayers ❤
Thank you so much for this important issue. Although I have been 'clean' from pornography for several years I have not healed from the damage done. Instead, I have chosen to not seek relationships for the last 20 years, feeling like I am too damaged. Now I am motivated to seek healing. Thank you again and God bless you.
You are loved and spoken for. I hope your healing journey is completed thoroughly. I recommend you also follow some videos out there by the Sisters of Life at conferences
I’m not worthy to give advise but I’ve listened to Fr Ripperger talk about how to pray to Jesus to heal our memory. Our Lady of sorrow is a great devotion for she reveals the nature of what you’re suffering. Confession is a great way according to the Priests for the devil to stop taunting you with your sins. Pray to our Lady and St Padre Pio to help you before confession so that you will be able to have a good confession.
"You are a powerhouse of love and that's why lust attacked you". Amazing truth. The struggle is real. Please pray for more women who feel called to speak about this sin and the healing process.
As a woman who struggled with pornography from the age of early elementary. I want to say thank you Matt. I have been porn free for about 3 years now finally went into confession after watching so many of your Videos on UA-cam. Thank you for hosting this lovely woman who speaks truth. I can honestly say you channel changed my life along side The Holy Rosary.
@@jestersage8700 I did through Playboys and Penthouse first. 1970’s and 1989’s playboy had graphic pictures. Then video’s in high school through college. After college and the advances of cable internet it was like owning a store. Horrible. So glad this young lady broke free by 19 or 20. I was in my mid 40’s.
I'm a man, but I remember an adoration during college that was the beginning of the end for my struggle with porn. The Eucharist is VERY powerful. Theology of the Body was the nail in the coffin of the old self.
My first reaction to this wax, "FINALLY" Thank you for this. She is a beautiful soul. I too have struggled with pronography being a woman. For over a decade and a half. Was addicted around 8th grade. Her suggestion on creating your own monstrance was absolutely beautiful. As a place to go when tempted, I plan on just, once having created my own mental monstrance, plan on placing the monstance in my favorite painting by Moné. Quite excited. Back in middle school, we had to use pastels to draw the same image. Once everyone finished, I looked at everyone else's and it was embarrasing for me because people kept asking whose painting was mine due to how well it was compared to the image we were imitating in art. I had to keep saying it was mine. It stood out the most. I still have it somewhere. My guardian Angel tried to help with my fight from lust on 2 occasions in the last 6 months of 2020. Also I had quite an experience in the confessional regarding confessing this sin back on January 8th earlier this year. I am a little over 6 months clean from visual porn! Thank you Jesus!
Seeing this talk, man, you don't know but I am in tears and it's just been 20 minutes of the talk. Nobody talks about this, this is the literal second time I see a woman talk about this and it's been years. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I was delighted to meet Rachael in an airport recently! Praise God for her humble courage to share her testimony. May the Lord bless her good work in helping others find freedom and chastity!
1:25:04 - 1:25:19 "Hypocrisy doesn't mean failing to live up to your own standards... A hypocrite is somebody who demands something from everyone else that he doesn't demand for himself." Truth!
Rachael, I was on my way out the door (left my laptop on, playing) and when I heard you quote your professor's response to you feeling like you weren't good enough...I put my purse down and jumped on my keyboard. I was told that I was Methodist as a child but we never went to church. My life has been..an adventure I'll just say. I felt compelled to learn more about the Catholic faith when I got out of jail 3 years ago and started listening to Dr. Marshall's pod casts. I need to convert. I'm compelled to. I just have to take the first step, which I know with most things is the hardest part. I've battled addiction, sexual abuse, and have commited a mortal sin. I know a little bit about the "not good enough" feeling and when I heard you say that...it was life changing. I felt the Holy Spirit in 2001. I burned all my books that were occultish or were I got in the shower and felt like I was being washed with the most beautiful golden rays of sunshine. Then I started getting visions of buildings falling and felt the need to work in emergency services of some kind. Strong enough for me to change jobs to a psychiatric crisis walk in center. I told my boss and my therapist about all this and went back to ask them to confirm for me that I really did tell them this after 9/11 happened. For a while, I was able to sense the balance between good vs evil in the world at any given moment. Since then My life struggles have increased a million fold. Having you describe your struggle as an attack orchestrated because you were a powerful child of God gave me such an amazing perspective shift. I've had people tell me that they see something dark attached to me. I've had many people that don't know anything about me come up as a stranger and ask me if they may pray over me. Please excuse this long post. I felt I needed to share this with you. Please pray for me to initiate my conversion beyond UA-cam lol. Thank you, both of you. I enjoy this channel so much.
Prayers said for you to Our Father and Our Mother ❤️ God Bless you maiden and keep us updated. (btw I'm sure the length of your post is the reason you're not getting a lot of response but that's the only reason so take heart in that. It's a risk and I've been on that side of things as well LOL but, It touched ME.
Shoot, you could make a testimony video when you're ready. I want to, but anonymous, I'm not comfortable putting my face out there, but some are brave or don't care. haha
Her saying how it was anger that was a major contributing factor to the obsessive behaviour was very striking. To realise its real human problems like anger that cause corruption and not exposure to corruption itself, gives back the power to the individual, freed from the shame. The struggle is real.
You can tell due to her high intellect that cognitive dissonance was always going to be a thorn in her side expressing in different ways such as this video's topic. Glad to see she achieved some resolution!
Watching from México. You just made me cry with this. Thank you guys for the honest and powerful conversation. They are really helpful. In regards to the question of being ready or not being for a relationship, I remember as a young boy, maybe 22, I asked God in secret if it was ok to have a certain girlfriend with a girl I was dating. So one day I went to this catholic talk, it was about something else entirely, nothing to do with romantic relationships at all, but somehow the guy giving the talk, turns around elevates his voice, and literally says: "You are not prepared for that kind of relationship" I always thought to this day God was answering my question, through him.
I confessed looking at pornography to a priest once and his reaction was, "Women do that??" I was mortified. I agree that that mentality makes women feel like they're men. It's awful.
Well it for sure was mortifying to you, but see it in a positive way. Now he knows it happens and if some other woman confesses the same he will have a better reaction (i hope so). In my case the priest wasnt surprised. He wasnt even surprised at all the other horrible things i had in my past concerning sins against chastity. I am a woman too. And its possible to be free. Other thing that really helped me was to get out of apps for dating...i only have the one from facebook and i write explicitely that i am a catholic, go to mass and dont want sex before marriage. Guess what? I am having honest conversations with 3 catholic guys. Had a date with one of them. The matter of conversation is completely different from wordly men! (Family, children, work, hobbies...no dirty stuff no insinuations, no looking at you like youre a piece of meat etc). I am also talking to my confessor and asking advice when i have questions on christian dating. I also have 2 books on the matter. I am thinking of going to mass with the guy that feels right later on. You know when i had time to understand who should i date more with.
Bruh, I'm sorry you went through that. When something like that happens to me I try to offer it up as helping me be more humble and less fearing about how people see me. It's hard tho.
In love with Pints w/ Aquinas! Keep up the amazing content, much love and prayers to you and your beautiful wife for the work you guys are putting out! Love from Bahrain 🌱
Started watching by accident and just fell in love with her mindset and the awesome Catholic solutions to overcoming sin. More people need to hear this.
Thank you for this. It is very isolating in this struggle and when I have reached out I was ignored. Can’t trust my family because they’re very toxically judgmental but there was one person that I told and I wish I could talk to her. She was loving and opened up on her past struggles
Went to confession and guess what was in the confessional...it was a STRIVE card! ALL the way here in Corpus Christi, TEXAS. These priest are really paying attention. Thanks for your diverse ministry Matt...all for the Glory of GOD! PAX
Rachael, thank you so much for your honest testimony. We were little kids, maybe 5 when we were exposed to a friend's father's porn. We were told that this is what being an adult meant. I had my first confession at 6, in preparation for my first communion also at 6. The sister who prepared us for confession, went through each commandment one by one, and we got to "thou shall not commit adultery," she said, "You cannot do this." So she skipped that commandment. I thought for sure it meant dressing in your Mom's clothes or acting like an adult. When I had my first confession at 6, I told Father that I committed adultery 85 times. He must have fallen off his chair. I thought it meant acting like an adult.
@@inna7803 I think we may have been too young at 6 to know what the word adultery meant, but we would have understood an age appropriate definition. When we were learning sins at 6 and the word adult was mentioned and confession was mentioned, we were sure we had done it. I mentioned it in the confessional many times. I felt guilt until I learned what it really meant. Until then, 5 would say, "I did something bad 15 (or another amount of) times this week, and the priest would ask, "What was it?" and I would say, "Children can't do this, but I am sure I did."
what a beautiful live saving ministry! may this magdala ministry continue to break the chains of sexual addiction and set souls free to love and change the world! a great pints with aquinas episode.
As a woman I struggle with lust, and pornography is a big problem I have notice the part of me that's most affected are my dreams, I keep having these sexual dreams with people I feel attracted to. Please pray for me.
Maybe you already do this. But i advice you sleep with the rosary under your pillow. Also i pray psalm 91, to my guardian angel and i ask Jesus and Mary to protect in my sleep. Today its very rare i have those dreams and when it happens actually i know its wrong. Its like my conscience refuse the temptation inside the dream. Truly God is giving me the grace to fight
Oh man, I have to pray every night to God, Mama Mary, St. Joseph, my Guardian angel, St. Michael... and then throwing holy water on my bed and myself. That helped me stop the dreams, but sometimes the demons want you to fall again so they'll attack you when you're asleep. It's disturbing.
Amazing interview. I started crying after hearing the line "Lust did not attack you because you can't love. Lust attacked you because your love is meant to change the world" Thanks Matt and Rachael.
So I finished it and I just have words of gratitude. You know, the anonymity you can generate on the internet has been a way for women to speak of it since they can disassociate from the persona who bears this situation of watching porn, you don't have to bear the shame of it knowing it is not you who faces the masses. It has given way to a community that talks about the issue to an extent but it is still such a small amount of women who know it as sin. In most cases you find them saying "oh, this is normal" "everyone does it", so finding someone that supports you in the battle against this sin is extremely difficult to do on the internet. Women are mostly alone in this issue so thank you, thank you and thank you again to both for sharing this.
Thank you for sharing your story Rachael. As Bishop Barron says "sin/addiction cannot be played around with, we have to hack it to pieces like the Amlekite archetype." If an alcoholic told his sponsor 'Im doing great, I only drink 3 days a week' or If I came home and said to my Mrs "I love you honey which is why I'm faithful to you 98% of the time." - it would not go down well.
Thank you for defining this! Just because it's not visual doesn't mean it's not porn! Women have been reading "romance " novels forever and thinking it's romantic and not pornographic.
Thank you for this. Definitely something that I have struggled with off and on, particularly the BDSM genre. Men may deal with this specific temptation more than women, but many women absolutely struggle with this.
You are not attacked by lust because you cannot love, you are attacked by lust because your love is meant to change the world. This line almost had me in tears. Thank you!!!!!
Its so good as a man to see women talking about this because men feel shame about how porn changed our minds. We all struggle the same , nobody is merely a “ creep”
I think what broke my addiction is realizing that my true desire was self-transcendence. I watched porn because i longed to have that bond with a woman- equal parts emotional, physical and spiritual. That bond of love that reflects on and strengthens my relationship with Christ. Porn could never give me that. Not only that, but the type of woman who would do sex work could never give me that. I just no longer have an appetite for it anymore after those realizations fully sank in. God delivered me from it. ☦️
48:19 Thank you so so so much for bringing up Rom-Coms! I've talked with friends and colleagues about their similarity and connection to pornography and I rarely find anyone seeing it that way!!
I lived some of this, but I found it really easy to drop reading pornographic fanfiction when I met my husband and was able to leave a toxic home situation. Feeling like I had hope and support and love made a huge difference.
She’s brave for speaking out. I really never think about women struggling with this since porn is not something I’ve ever come into contact with. You typically think of men becoming addicted. Just goes to show that the devil goes far and wide to hurt people. God bless Rachael and everyone struggling!
Heard her speak for a theology on tap meeting at my parish in March!!! So amazing that she is on this platform and more people get to hear her testimony!!!💗
Dear Matt, because you're so good at what you do, could you please bring someone to talk about single motherhood/parenthood in the catholic community? Thanks in advance😁 God bless❤❤
Thank you PWA for this episode! This has me convinced that I must read the Great Divorce, simply from the snippets of conversation about it here. Also, as someone in her mid-twenties trying to own up and beef up my previously feelbe/nonexistant struggles against porn, THANK YOU. May God Bless you both and this channel abundantly!
As a man this really helped me realize the major differences, yet similarities of women and men. It’s so important we protect womens rights and safe environments meaning (sports, bathrooms, and any woman’s specific groups) as man we must not fall prey to what Adam did in the garden… in not standing up for our women.
Fantastic! You both are great in dialogue on this "unspoken" topic. Great advise using scripture, Aquinas and Chesterton. Glad you highlight the Sacraments in recovery and renewal too. Bravo!
Hi Rachael! I just finished up several years working for Young Life and am now doing something else. Praying and moving toward being Catholic. Thanks for sharing you story.
Excited to listen to this. I am a woman who was chained to pornography for many years, at times, I would stay indoors all day and do nothing but view pornography and masturbate (in my 20s). I also had a problem with promiscuity with men. Only with the grace of God have i been able to stop for a few months now. Its even more difficult when people everywhere are normalizing it. I pray for everybody to be released! Sexual sin is the most prominent problem right now!!
Lady, there are way worse things to do...than to stay inside and masterbate to porn all day long! It's a great way to release sexual tension! I gave up dating back in 2007 because women are simply demanding/impossible to deal with (80% of women are literally chasing 10% of men out there..in addition women initiate 75% of divorces)...and I feel that porn is a great way to fantasize my way to an orgasm. After I'm done..I can go about my day (or fall asleep, lol). I wish more women liked porn...at least talking about sex with them wouldnt be such a difficult subject. Finding a woman who a man can have a decent conversation about sex...is about as easy as finding a woman who likes sports and poker. It's literally easier to find Waldo in one of those kid's "Where's Waldo" books..then it is to find a woman who likes sports, poker and porn!
For those who still struggle with this and other mortal sins, I hope this prayer helps. (Can be prayed daily) Prayer: For Wretched Sinners Dear Jesus, help me a poor wretched sinner, to come to You with remorse in my soul. Cleanse me from the sins, which have destroyed my life. Give me the gift of a new life free from the shackles of sin and the freedom, which my sins deny me. Renew me in the Light of Your Mercy. Embrace me in Your Heart. Let me feel Your Love so that I can become close to You and that my love for You is ignited. Have Mercy on me, Jesus, and keep me free from sin. Make me worthy to enter Your New Paradise. Amen.
You are so right on the reading part , now that I think of my youth and reading novels , that was fir me the start. Thank goodness discovered later in life and stopped. Now I’m devoted to My faith , no more putting myself in that road. Thank God!
I was one of those who said Women don't struggle with this issue but, this interview has really woke me up. Alot triggers I think Women have also men can fall into the same trap.
Unfortunately sexism can blind us to women’s struggles with sexuality. Hormones can also have a big effect. When women are young, when they are pregnant and at certain times in our cycle we can find our sex drive increase dramatically and can struggle with lustful desire just like men. What we find erotic of course can be different but the natural sex drive is still there.
Very happy that someone is helping women with this. I know young Catholic couples who’ve been able to open up about this topic and take care of it together, and their openness about it is how I realized this is a problem for both men and women; just on different levels. The problems with modern technology are so hard to deal with because it’s difficult to adjust to something less. I love music and being able to easily communicate with others, but beyond the availability of bad content, smart phones create a lot of distractions that harm my overall productivity.
Very interesting topic. I didn’t really think women struggled with pornography. I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a woman who’s ever admitted to even watching/reading it. So my hat’s off to you for being brave enough to pursue this ministry.
I love how easy it is to be Catholic and live your faith in the states, you can go to Catholic college and be amongst like minded people and have lovely Catholic communities. In Ireland it’s so hard to do that now. I would even say people want it out of the country completely now, it’s very difficult. What a fantastic interview thank you
Unfortunately, it’s becoming a lot harder to find communities of like-minded, faithful Catholics. It is a big shame what's happened to Ireland though. I'm worried the U.S. will go down that path soon. 😕
Being from NI, married to an ROI man and so always keeping up to date with the news, my soul was firmly shook when Ireland brought in the access to abortion. I thought for such a ‘Catholic’ country it’s just degraded to pure commercialism and ‘my rights’ ethics. In the island as a whole, it feels like you’re the crazy one if you want to live your life by the catechism. Don’t even get me started on the people who show huge disrespect in Mass by talking, phones on, not disciplining their children to settle (I have children and have been through this but I have always removed them if they got too disruptive). I’m going back to roots I was brought up in through the 90s, when going to Mass was still strong and really investigating and developing my faith my parents gifted me, through my 37 year old eyes. With regard to this topic, I think it is very relevant. I’ve been plagued with dreams recently relating to this and feel like it’s temptation at your weakest point. I pray that I can work through it and that my husband can address the issue too…..though he became introduced to it by finding his Father’s stash and now I fear he feels it’s ‘normal’. Praying for slow but steady conversion of the heart for us both 🙏🏼
@@ktoth29 becoming increasingly secular, it’s frightening. People putting their own spin on it and developing a pseudo Catholic mindset. I feel like if you really try to live the Catholic way, you’re secretly mocked as being backward. A lot of damage in this country with the church scandals including the child abuse and the Magdalene sisters, many infants born to young mothers back in the 50’s - late 70’s died and were buried in unmarked graves. The devastation it caused understandably made people hurt by the church, reject the church. However, I understand that this period retains to the infiltration of Satan. Nevertheless, from then the country definitely became increasingly secular
Sad Ireland use to be predominantly Catholic. Yes being in the US we can be in like-minded communities but outside of them the US has become very secular. Catholics in particular has mostly been targeted here.
Okay, so that line about why lust attacks us, because of the love that can change the world, broke me (but in a good way). I’m going to think about that for the rest of my life. Thank you.
This is amazing - thanks guys! I’m evangelical Christian and wish this was something more openly discussed throughout all churches and study groups through churches. ❤
So you're against an adult being able to watch people enjoy having sex on video...yet how do you feel about AR-15s? The average Jesus Freak's position: 1. watching people have sex on film? EVIL!!! 2. owning an AR-15 is a legal right gifted man by their made up god! Just another reason to freaking hate religious people.
Sorry, this is gonna be really long. Fanfiction and fanart was a huge gateway when I was in elementary school, although I didn't realize it for years. It's been a huge crutch to my mental/sexual discipline, my health, my spiritual life and my interest in life in general. It started as a childish curiosity and then evolved into an outlet for lonliess and anxiety. Not entirely related but I find that fanfiction is bad for sexual, spiritual and mental health reasons. I felt scared and sad the moment I realized I was so addicted to fanfiction that I was losing my life. I had hours and hours of time I couldn't even account for because I was so busy pretending I was somewhere else. Hours and hours throughout years btw. Literal years of my life are blurry. It kinda made me want to just... die? Like, I felt like I wasn't cut out for living in the real world. I didn't think I could make it, that I wasn't good of strong enough to handle or deserve real life. Especially not the things I wanted. Trying to be present is really hard. Especially with addictions like this. But I feel like living finally feels worth it again.
Writers, artists, and other creative types are always in fantasy worlds, not as visitors, but as permanent residents. God evidentially gave them the aptitude for imagination in the first place. It would be strange to argue that they weren't intended to utilize it, especially when any creative project requires hard work.
I'm a man, but I thought I was the only person that struggled with porn for the longest time too. Even when I encountered guys that were open about their porn use, they didn't view it as a struggle, but like it was a normal habit they were almost proud of.
@Eddard Tyrsson if they're Christian it is. I have a younger christian cousin 17 who struggles and he isn't proud whatsoever. He always feels guilty. I tell him he's still better than the guys who are Christian and proud of it, they're not very consistent.
Best channel on UA-cam
I approve this message
@@pintswithaquinas 👍🏼👍🏼🤗
Was about to write the same and suddenly came across your comment.I gave it thumbs up.
just after Matt Walsh!
@@eternalbyzantium262 I think Joe will someday go on PwA. 😁
Please brothers and sisters I am really struggling with chastity. Please, please pray for me! Thank you
Prayers for you brother 🙏
Prayers for you, Casey Mckee
I pray for you that you may not feel obliged to chastity if it doesn’t feel natural to you
@@christianRafaelCasti Hi friend! No I wouldn’t. My instinct tells me that lying is wrong. As for chastity, the dogmatic (un-questioning) insistence on chastity has been a source of much neurosis for many people. To me it makes more sense for each individual to try it out for themselves whether they prefer to be chaste or have a more relaxed attitude about sex. Nothing horrible will happen, as long as you’re careful (about STD’s etc.) You won’t go to hell. I see it as a matter of preference discovered through experimentation.
ua-cam.com/video/PVPnIKrjTqY/v-deo.html
Haven’t watched this yet but what a round of applause this woman deserves for being so bold and transparent on a subject surrounded by such profound shame. U rock
She liked it 🤷🏻♂️
Definitely! If only most women were open and honest about thier pornography obsession as she is. What a wonderful world that would be. Watching from London UK 🇬🇧
..and exudes warmth and sexuality too. I like em that do, more faithful.
Absolutely. I’m not religious but what she is doing is so open, fearless and honest and I admire it a lot!
If you haven't watched it yet, how do you know what this woman is even saying? Just wondering
When she said that women have an identity crisis. I really felt that as a teen. I thought I might be lesbian. Thank God I never acted on anything. I’m happily married, and neither my husband or I are ever tempted to watch porn anymore
@ghjefffh hhinkclel cumbrain
Same thing for me! I am still struggling with my identity, but something always held me back from ever acting on these feelings and I know that it was God!
Most women or somewhat lesbians
God bless y’all, hopefully if you have children you can both teach them properly the dangers of this new drug.
@@Android-ds9iemost people are somewhat homosexual
I think women who struggle with lust is kept more hidden or underground especially as a Catholic woman. After watching this I am aware of the different ways I too have sinned. Thank you Rachel, please continue because society is not addressing how women struggle with this.
I think women struggling with lust are seen as "trashy." I would be more open with my struggle with lust but I fear being seen as a whore, slut, or easy. Lust is supposed to be a man's problem.
Society really hasn’t for the past 15 years and it’s been incredibly frustrating. Everything is geared toward men and their addictions, why not us too?
@@user-lt1jd1ye3vcritiquing women has become taboo
I thank The Lord I was never addicted to porn or found it appeasing. My heart goes out to everyone who is addicted or over coming their addiction. You're in my prayers ❤
9 years ago our Lord unchained me from pornography.
I am a woman.
What is a women?
@@greenmarine500 😀
God Bless You!!
I am 2 years clean, still hard but with God's grace and my guardian angel, moving ahead. Blessings.
@@carlospacheco7361 If you haven't yet get closer to st.Joseph he will help you.
He loves chastity and I love him😊. May God bless you!
Thank you so much for this important issue. Although I have been 'clean' from pornography for several years I have not healed from the damage done. Instead, I have chosen to not seek relationships for the last 20 years, feeling like I am too damaged. Now I am motivated to seek healing. Thank you again and God bless you.
You are loved and spoken for. I hope your healing journey is completed thoroughly. I recommend you also follow some videos out there by the Sisters of Life at conferences
Oh no. 20 years is a long time to avoid romance. Don't be so hard on yourself
I’m not worthy to give advise but I’ve listened to Fr Ripperger talk about how to pray to Jesus to heal our memory. Our Lady of sorrow is a great devotion for she reveals the nature of what you’re suffering. Confession is a great way according to the Priests for the devil to stop taunting you with your sins. Pray to our Lady and St Padre Pio to help you before confession so that you will be able to have a good confession.
Powerful!
38:00
"Lust did not attack you because you can't love. Lust attacked you because your love can change the world."
Whoa!
Dang. That one hit home
Great quote.
It's at the 36:00 minute mark.....
"You are a powerhouse of love and that's why lust attacked you". Amazing truth. The struggle is real. Please pray for more women who feel called to speak about this sin and the healing process.
I second that ❤️🙏❤️
As a woman who struggled with pornography from the age of early elementary. I want to say thank you Matt. I have been porn free for about 3 years now finally went into confession after watching so many of your Videos on UA-cam. Thank you for hosting this lovely woman who speaks truth. I can honestly say you channel changed my life along side The Holy Rosary.
Early elementary? How the hell did you get exposed to porn that early?
Very similar to my story as well!
@@jestersage8700 how the hell could you ask such an insensitive question? Get a life man and wake up.
@@jestersage8700 I did through Playboys and Penthouse first. 1970’s and 1989’s playboy had graphic pictures. Then video’s in high school through college. After college and the advances of cable internet it was like owning a store. Horrible. So glad this young lady broke free by 19 or 20. I was in my mid 40’s.
@jestersage8700 an adult who wasn't responsible with their magazines.
This is SO powerful!! Magdala Ministries has been such a huge blessing in my life recently. Praise be to God for your YES
You’re spot on. God Bless sis
I'm a man, but I remember an adoration during college that was the beginning of the end for my struggle with porn. The Eucharist is VERY powerful. Theology of the Body was the nail in the coffin of the old self.
IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS!!! Such a good topic and a fundamental part of my story and seeing the redemption that is in Christ!
Same!
Yesssss!!
💙
My first reaction to this wax, "FINALLY"
Thank you for this. She is a beautiful soul.
I too have struggled with pronography being a woman. For over a decade and a half. Was addicted around 8th grade.
Her suggestion on creating your own monstrance was absolutely beautiful. As a place to go when tempted, I plan on just, once having created my own mental monstrance, plan on placing the monstance in my favorite painting by Moné. Quite excited. Back in middle school, we had to use pastels to draw the same image. Once everyone finished, I looked at everyone else's and it was embarrasing for me because people kept asking whose painting was mine due to how well it was compared to the image we were imitating in art. I had to keep saying it was mine. It stood out the most. I still have it somewhere.
My guardian Angel tried to help with my fight from lust on 2 occasions in the last 6 months of 2020. Also I had quite an experience in the confessional regarding confessing this sin back on January 8th earlier this year.
I am a little over 6 months clean from visual porn! Thank you Jesus!
God bless you! Will keep you and everyone on this site in my prayers!
Put up religious pictures throughout your home and have them blessed. Pray the rosary every day!
You are awesome. You are loved and you are forgiven
@@stevep6318 awesome to hear, thank you!
@@figurefour633 I pray the rosary at least twice a day. :) Weekends usually 3 times a day.
Seeing this talk, man, you don't know but I am in tears and it's just been 20 minutes of the talk. Nobody talks about this, this is the literal second time I see a woman talk about this and it's been years.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I was delighted to meet Rachael in an airport recently! Praise God for her humble courage to share her testimony. May the Lord bless her good work in helping others find freedom and chastity!
1:25:04 - 1:25:19 "Hypocrisy doesn't mean failing to live up to your own standards... A hypocrite is somebody who demands something from everyone else that he doesn't demand for himself." Truth!
“I’m not crying, you’re crying,” was exactly what I thought before Matt said it after that one quote 😂
Rachael, I was on my way out the door (left my laptop on, playing) and when I heard you quote your professor's response to you feeling like you weren't good enough...I put my purse down and jumped on my keyboard. I was told that I was Methodist as a child but we never went to church. My life has been..an adventure I'll just say. I felt compelled to learn more about the Catholic faith when I got out of jail 3 years ago and started listening to Dr. Marshall's pod casts. I need to convert. I'm compelled to. I just have to take the first step, which I know with most things is the hardest part. I've battled addiction, sexual abuse, and have commited a mortal sin. I know a little bit about the "not good enough" feeling and when I heard you say that...it was life changing. I felt the Holy Spirit in 2001. I burned all my books that were occultish or were I got in the shower and felt like I was being washed with the most beautiful golden rays of sunshine. Then I started getting visions of buildings falling and felt the need to work in emergency services of some kind. Strong enough for me to change jobs to a psychiatric crisis walk in center. I told my boss and my therapist about all this and went back to ask them to confirm for me that I really did tell them this after 9/11 happened. For a while, I was able to sense the balance between good vs evil in the world at any given moment. Since then My life struggles have increased a million fold. Having you describe your struggle as an attack orchestrated because you were a powerful child of God gave me such an amazing perspective shift. I've had people tell me that they see something dark attached to me. I've had many people that don't know anything about me come up as a stranger and ask me if they may pray over me. Please excuse this long post. I felt I needed to share this with you. Please pray for me to initiate my conversion beyond UA-cam lol. Thank you, both of you. I enjoy this channel so much.
Prayers said for you to Our Father and Our Mother ❤️ God Bless you maiden and keep us updated. (btw I'm sure the length of your post is the reason you're not getting a lot of response but that's the only reason so take heart in that. It's a risk and I've been on that side of things as well LOL but, It touched ME.
@@Freedomrock1920
Wow, what an awesome life story!
Shoot, you could make a testimony video when you're ready. I want to, but anonymous, I'm not comfortable putting my face out there, but some are brave or don't care. haha
I hope you have never allowed someone (you do not trust) to lay a hand on your head pretending to pray for you.
Her saying how it was anger that was a major contributing factor to the obsessive behaviour was very striking.
To realise its real human problems like anger that cause corruption and not exposure to corruption itself, gives back the power to the individual, freed from the shame. The struggle is real.
You can tell due to her high intellect that cognitive dissonance was always going to be a thorn in her side expressing in different ways such as this video's topic. Glad to see she achieved some resolution!
Watching from México. You just made me cry with this. Thank you guys for the honest and powerful conversation. They are really helpful. In regards to the question of being ready or not being for a relationship, I remember as a young boy, maybe 22, I asked God in secret if it was ok to have a certain girlfriend with a girl I was dating. So one day I went to this catholic talk, it was about something else entirely, nothing to do with romantic relationships at all, but somehow the guy giving the talk, turns around elevates his voice, and literally says: "You are not prepared for that kind of relationship" I always thought to this day God was answering my question, through him.
Brave young woman, she is helping thousands of people with her story, thank you
I confessed looking at pornography to a priest once and his reaction was, "Women do that??" I was mortified. I agree that that mentality makes women feel like they're men. It's awful.
Well it for sure was mortifying to you, but see it in a positive way. Now he knows it happens and if some other woman confesses the same he will have a better reaction (i hope so). In my case the priest wasnt surprised. He wasnt even surprised at all the other horrible things i had in my past concerning sins against chastity. I am a woman too. And its possible to be free. Other thing that really helped me was to get out of apps for dating...i only have the one from facebook and i write explicitely that i am a catholic, go to mass and dont want sex before marriage. Guess what? I am having honest conversations with 3 catholic guys. Had a date with one of them. The matter of conversation is completely different from wordly men! (Family, children, work, hobbies...no dirty stuff no insinuations, no looking at you like youre a piece of meat etc). I am also talking to my confessor and asking advice when i have questions on christian dating. I also have 2 books on the matter. I am thinking of going to mass with the guy that feels right later on. You know when i had time to understand who should i date more with.
How old was this priest?
@lex ora I guess a lot of women don't confess this then.
@lex ora I remember thinking it was super cool that the Virgin Mary never aged past 33.
I don't know if that Vatican approved.
I am female
Bruh, I'm sorry you went through that. When something like that happens to me I try to offer it up as helping me be more humble and less fearing about how people see me. It's hard tho.
In love with Pints w/ Aquinas! Keep up the amazing content, much love and prayers to you and your beautiful wife for the work you guys are putting out! Love from Bahrain 🌱
Thank you for this video! I have always felt like people didn't notice that women can struggle with porn and chastity too.
People don't notice the struggle women have with porn but I think it's very obvious the struggle they have with chastity lol
What an incredibly blessed young woman. Thank God she was able to understand why she needed to gain victory over this. What a wonderful happy ending.
Greetings from a Mexican viewer. Your content is great.
Started watching by accident and just fell in love with her mindset and the awesome Catholic solutions to overcoming sin. More people need to hear this.
what's a tonk?
Thank you for this. It is very isolating in this struggle and when I have reached out I was ignored. Can’t trust my family because they’re very toxically judgmental but there was one person that I told and I wish I could talk to her. She was loving and opened up on her past struggles
Might suck that they're judgemental but better that then being accepting of it like it's a good thing. Imagine how much worse that would be.
Went to confession and guess what was in the confessional...it was a STRIVE card! ALL the way here in Corpus Christi, TEXAS. These priest are really paying attention. Thanks for your diverse ministry Matt...all for the Glory of GOD! PAX
Whats a "STRIVE" card?
This episode changed my life. Thank you ♥️
As a man still wrestling with this vice, this has been one of the most powerful personal accounts I've ever heard. Thank you and glory to Jesus Christ
This episode was necessary. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
Absolutely amazing love that line. Lust did not attack because you can't love, lust attacked you because you are meant to change the world.
Rachael, thank you so much for your honest testimony. We were little kids, maybe 5 when we were exposed to a friend's father's porn. We were told that this is what being an adult meant. I had my first confession at 6, in preparation for my first communion also at 6. The sister who prepared us for confession, went through each commandment one by one, and we got to "thou shall not commit adultery," she said, "You cannot do this." So she skipped that commandment. I thought for sure it meant dressing in your Mom's clothes or acting like an adult. When I had my first confession at 6, I told Father that I committed adultery 85 times. He must have fallen off his chair. I thought it meant acting like an adult.
😭
@@inna7803 I think we may have been too young at 6 to know what the word adultery meant, but we would have understood an age appropriate definition. When we were learning sins at 6 and the word adult was mentioned and confession was mentioned, we were sure we had done it. I mentioned it in the confessional many times. I felt guilt until I learned what it really meant. Until then, 5 would say, "I did something bad 15 (or another amount of) times this week, and the priest would ask, "What was it?" and I would say, "Children can't do this, but I am sure I did."
what a beautiful live saving ministry! may this magdala ministry continue to break the chains of sexual addiction and set souls free to love and change the world! a great pints with aquinas episode.
Just, thank you. Glory to Jesus Christ.
Amen.
🙏🏻
As a woman I struggle with lust, and pornography is a big problem I have notice the part of me that's most affected are my dreams, I keep having these sexual dreams with people I feel attracted to. Please pray for me.
Maybe you already do this. But i advice you sleep with the rosary under your pillow. Also i pray psalm 91, to my guardian angel and i ask Jesus and Mary to protect in my sleep. Today its very rare i have those dreams and when it happens actually i know its wrong. Its like my conscience refuse the temptation inside the dream. Truly God is giving me the grace to fight
🙏🙏🙏🕊️
I've been doing good, thanks God!
You are not responsible for your sleeping dreams.
Oh man, I have to pray every night to God, Mama Mary, St. Joseph, my Guardian angel, St. Michael... and then throwing holy water on my bed and myself. That helped me stop the dreams, but sometimes the demons want you to fall again so they'll attack you when you're asleep. It's disturbing.
I'm such a fan of this channel. My prayers are with you always, love and greetings from the Philippines
Amazing interview. I started crying after hearing the line "Lust did not attack you because you can't love. Lust attacked you because your love is meant to change the world" Thanks Matt and Rachael.
Bravery in our times is fighting what she’s fighting. So happy for her!!
So I finished it and I just have words of gratitude.
You know, the anonymity you can generate on the internet has been a way for women to speak of it since they can disassociate from the persona who bears this situation of watching porn, you don't have to bear the shame of it knowing it is not you who faces the masses. It has given way to a community that talks about the issue to an extent but it is still such a small amount of women who know it as sin. In most cases you find them saying "oh, this is normal" "everyone does it", so finding someone that supports you in the battle against this sin is extremely difficult to do on the internet. Women are mostly alone in this issue so thank you, thank you and thank you again to both for sharing this.
Thank you for sharing your story Rachael. As Bishop Barron says "sin/addiction cannot be played around with, we have to hack it to pieces like the Amlekite archetype." If an alcoholic told his sponsor 'Im doing great, I only drink 3 days a week' or If I came home and said to my Mrs "I love you honey which is why I'm faithful to you 98% of the time." - it would not go down well.
@X X Who died and made you God?
I have so much to say on this and my personal struggles and wish I had someone to talk to. So glad I found this channel and Victory
Everything you both have talked about as to the feelings during and what you have to do to stop is exactly the same as stopping drug use. EXACTLY!!!
Thank you for defining this! Just because it's not visual doesn't mean it's not porn! Women have been reading "romance " novels forever and thinking it's romantic and not pornographic.
Thank you for this. Definitely something that I have struggled with off and on, particularly the BDSM genre. Men may deal with this specific temptation more than women, but many women absolutely struggle with this.
43:25 When Matt tells people to just shut up, you know it’s going to be a good episode 👍
You are not attacked by lust because you cannot love, you are attacked by lust because your love is meant to change the world.
This line almost had me in tears. Thank you!!!!!
I kept mine hidden because people either judge or seem to get off on it. I'm proud of this lady for speaking up
Incredible conversation. Just beautiful. Thank you so much!
Its so good as a man to see women talking about this because men feel shame about how porn changed our minds. We all struggle the same , nobody is merely a “ creep”
I think what broke my addiction is realizing that my true desire was self-transcendence. I watched porn because i longed to have that bond with a woman- equal parts emotional, physical and spiritual. That bond of love that reflects on and strengthens my relationship with Christ. Porn could never give me that. Not only that, but the type of woman who would do sex work could never give me that. I just no longer have an appetite for it anymore after those realizations fully sank in. God delivered me from it. ☦️
She is so humble and inspiring. Thanks from France. You American catholics are very impressive !
48:19 Thank you so so so much for bringing up Rom-Coms! I've talked with friends and colleagues about their similarity and connection to pornography and I rarely find anyone seeing it that way!!
Great interview . Americans are so good at openly discussing awkward topics . We are useless at talking about awkward topics here in Ireland 😂.
Yes. Americans are a real breath of fresh air when dealing with taboo subjects. Feeling gratefull
There is hope yet, Fradd is an Aussie!
Be the first brave one to do so. xD lol jk. Easier said than done.
I lived some of this, but I found it really easy to drop reading pornographic fanfiction when I met my husband and was able to leave a toxic home situation. Feeling like I had hope and support and love made a huge difference.
Kudos. "It is finished" made me cry
This is great, love this interview and this channel. Thank you.
She’s brave for speaking out. I really never think about women struggling with this since porn is not something I’ve ever come into contact with. You typically think of men becoming addicted. Just goes to show that the devil goes far and wide to hurt people. God bless Rachael and everyone struggling!
It's definitely true but men deal with porn addiction way worst than women unfortunately . I hope one day porn gets completely outlawed
You are lucky you never got into porn.
Pretty smile
Heard her speak for a theology on tap meeting at my parish in March!!! So amazing that she is on this platform and more people get to hear her testimony!!!💗
Dear Matt, because you're so good at what you do, could you please bring someone to talk about single motherhood/parenthood in the catholic community?
Thanks in advance😁
God bless❤❤
Thank you for this Matt! And thank you to Rachael!
Lord please deliver me from lust and pornography 😭 Thank You Jesus 😭🙏
There is something very inspiring yet terrifying in someone laying their sins bare for others to learn how they overcame them. Props to this girl.
1:42:35 - 1:44:56
Great answer!
Tobit 8:7 is worth reflecting on, invitation of prayer to the marriage bed.
God bless this beautiful woman and her new husband ♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️
Thank you PWA for this episode! This has me convinced that I must read the Great Divorce, simply from the snippets of conversation about it here.
Also, as someone in her mid-twenties trying to own up and beef up my previously feelbe/nonexistant struggles against porn, THANK YOU. May God Bless you both and this channel abundantly!
As a man this really helped me realize the major differences, yet similarities of women and men. It’s so important we protect womens rights and safe environments meaning (sports, bathrooms, and any woman’s specific groups) as man we must not fall prey to what Adam did in the garden… in not standing up for our women.
This is excellent. God Bless you both and all who hear and meaningfully share this.
Fantastic! You both are great in dialogue on this "unspoken" topic.
Great advise using scripture, Aquinas and Chesterton. Glad you highlight the Sacraments in recovery and renewal too. Bravo!
I struggle with a different sin BUT the TRUTH of your words spoke into it just as clear and decisive and full of love Thank you!!
She has been telling the truth and has been shaming the devil. God bless her testimony.
Forget all the crazy that's going on in the world. THIS is what women's liberation looks like.
Petition to play the intro music at 1.5x for maximum hype
Great conversation, hits right on the mark.
Love having these talks with WOMEN! Keep them coming, very helpful.
Hi Rachael! I just finished up several years working for Young Life and am now doing something else. Praying and moving toward being Catholic. Thanks for sharing you story.
Excited to listen to this. I am a woman who was chained to pornography for many years, at times, I would stay indoors all day and do nothing but view pornography and masturbate (in my 20s). I also had a problem with promiscuity with men. Only with the grace of God have i been able to stop for a few months now.
Its even more difficult when people everywhere are normalizing it. I pray for everybody to be released! Sexual sin is the most prominent problem right now!!
Lady, there are way worse things to do...than to stay inside and masterbate to porn all day long! It's a great way to release sexual tension! I gave up dating back in 2007 because women are simply demanding/impossible to deal with (80% of women are literally chasing 10% of men out there..in addition women initiate 75% of divorces)...and I feel that porn is a great way to fantasize my way to an orgasm. After I'm done..I can go about my day (or fall asleep, lol).
I wish more women liked porn...at least talking about sex with them wouldnt be such a difficult subject. Finding a woman who a man can have a decent conversation about sex...is about as easy as finding a woman who likes sports and poker. It's literally easier to find Waldo in one of those kid's "Where's Waldo" books..then it is to find a woman who likes sports, poker and porn!
For those who still struggle with this and other mortal sins, I hope this prayer helps. (Can be prayed daily)
Prayer: For Wretched Sinners
Dear Jesus, help me a poor wretched sinner, to come to You with remorse in my soul.
Cleanse me from the sins, which have destroyed my life. Give me the gift of a new life free from the shackles of sin and the freedom, which my sins deny me. Renew me in the Light of Your Mercy.
Embrace me in Your Heart. Let me feel Your Love so that I can become close to You and that my love for You is ignited.
Have Mercy on me, Jesus, and keep me free from sin. Make me worthy to enter Your New Paradise. Amen.
You are so right on the reading part , now that I think of my youth and reading novels , that was fir me the start. Thank goodness discovered later in life and stopped. Now I’m devoted to My faith , no more putting myself in that road. Thank God!
I was one of those who said Women don't struggle with this issue but, this interview has really woke me up. Alot triggers I think Women have also men can fall into the same trap.
Saint Mary of Egypt is an example of a female saint that struggled deeply with lust
Unfortunately sexism can blind us to women’s struggles with sexuality. Hormones can also have a big effect. When women are young, when they are pregnant and at certain times in our cycle we can find our sex drive increase dramatically and can struggle with lustful desire just like men. What we find erotic of course can be different but the natural sex drive is still there.
Very happy that someone is helping women with this. I know young Catholic couples who’ve been able to open up about this topic and take care of it together, and their openness about it is how I realized this is a problem for both men and women; just on different levels. The problems with modern technology are so hard to deal with because it’s difficult to adjust to something less. I love music and being able to easily communicate with others, but beyond the availability of bad content, smart phones create a lot of distractions that harm my overall productivity.
Wait? So both of them were watching porn? Or one of them? Or one of them used to consume it?
Very interesting topic. I didn’t really think women struggled with pornography. I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a woman who’s ever admitted to even watching/reading it. So my hat’s off to you for being brave enough to pursue this ministry.
it's a lot few of them
I love how easy it is to be Catholic and live your faith in the states, you can go to Catholic college and be amongst like minded people and have lovely Catholic communities. In Ireland it’s so hard to do that now. I would even say people want it out of the country completely now, it’s very difficult.
What a fantastic interview thank you
Unfortunately, it’s becoming a lot harder to find communities of like-minded, faithful Catholics. It is a big shame what's happened to Ireland though. I'm worried the U.S. will go down that path soon. 😕
Its hard to be Catholic in Ireland? Is Ireland not an overwhelmingly Catholic country anymore?
Being from NI, married to an ROI man and so always keeping up to date with the news, my soul was firmly shook when Ireland brought in the access to abortion. I thought for such a ‘Catholic’ country it’s just degraded to pure commercialism and ‘my rights’ ethics. In the island as a whole, it feels like you’re the crazy one if you want to live your life by the catechism. Don’t even get me started on the people who show huge disrespect in Mass by talking, phones on, not disciplining their children to settle (I have children and have been through this but I have always removed them if they got too disruptive).
I’m going back to roots I was brought up in through the 90s, when going to Mass was still strong and really investigating and developing my faith my parents gifted me, through my 37 year old eyes.
With regard to this topic, I think it is very relevant. I’ve been plagued with dreams recently relating to this and feel like it’s temptation at your weakest point. I pray that I can work through it and that my husband can address the issue too…..though he became introduced to it by finding his Father’s stash and now I fear he feels it’s ‘normal’. Praying for slow but steady conversion of the heart for us both 🙏🏼
@@ktoth29 becoming increasingly secular, it’s frightening. People putting their own spin on it and developing a pseudo Catholic mindset. I feel like if you really try to live the Catholic way, you’re secretly mocked as being backward. A lot of damage in this country with the church scandals including the child abuse and the Magdalene sisters, many infants born to young mothers back in the 50’s - late 70’s died and were buried in unmarked graves. The devastation it caused understandably made people hurt by the church, reject the church. However, I understand that this period retains to the infiltration of Satan. Nevertheless, from then the country definitely became increasingly secular
Sad Ireland use to be predominantly Catholic. Yes being in the US we can be in like-minded communities but outside of them the US has become very secular. Catholics in particular has mostly been targeted here.
Incredible episode. Rachael is wonderful.
(and to counter the few negative comments, I quite enjoy how her voice sounds😊 )
"Lust did not attack you because you can't love, lust attacked you because your love is meant to change the world." 36:00
Rachel and Tommy! Let’s gooooo. I went to college with Rachel and I did retreats with a Tommy in Nashville!
My daughter lives in Nashville, where is a good Catholic community for woman in there 20’s
God bless her, God love PWA.
Your channel is saving lives,Matt.
Okay, so that line about why lust attacks us, because of the love that can change the world, broke me (but in a good way). I’m going to think about that for the rest of my life. Thank you.
This is amazing - thanks guys! I’m evangelical Christian and wish this was something more openly discussed throughout all churches and study groups through churches. ❤
So you're against an adult being able to watch people enjoy having sex on video...yet how do you feel about AR-15s?
The average Jesus Freak's position: 1. watching people have sex on film? EVIL!!! 2. owning an AR-15 is a legal right gifted man by their made up god!
Just another reason to freaking hate religious people.
I love that line “you don’t have to quit pornography if you don’t want to”.
Because it makes people realize that they REALLY don’t want it.
There’s something truly beautiful about authentic holiness. I know she’s not perfect but what a beautiful soul. God shining through.
No one is perfect. Praise God that we do not have to be perfect to be holy, which simply means being consecrated and set apart.
This was a fantastic conversation. Thanks MF & RK
Appreciate your content so much. Great video! 10/10
Sorry, this is gonna be really long.
Fanfiction and fanart was a huge gateway when I was in elementary school, although I didn't realize it for years. It's been a huge crutch to my mental/sexual discipline, my health, my spiritual life and my interest in life in general.
It started as a childish curiosity and then evolved into an outlet for lonliess and anxiety.
Not entirely related but I find that fanfiction is bad for sexual, spiritual and mental health reasons.
I felt scared and sad the moment I realized I was so addicted to fanfiction that I was losing my life. I had hours and hours of time I couldn't even account for because I was so busy pretending I was somewhere else. Hours and hours throughout years btw. Literal years of my life are blurry. It kinda made me want to just... die? Like, I felt like I wasn't cut out for living in the real world. I didn't think I could make it, that I wasn't good of strong enough to handle or deserve real life. Especially not the things I wanted.
Trying to be present is really hard. Especially with addictions like this. But I feel like living finally feels worth it again.
Writers, artists, and other creative types are always in fantasy worlds, not as visitors, but as permanent residents. God evidentially gave them the aptitude for imagination in the first place. It would be strange to argue that they weren't intended to utilize it, especially when any creative project requires hard work.
I'm a man, but I thought I was the only person that struggled with porn for the longest time too. Even when I encountered guys that were open about their porn use, they didn't view it as a struggle, but like it was a normal habit they were almost proud of.
@Eddard Tyrsson if they're Christian it is. I have a younger christian cousin 17 who struggles and he isn't proud whatsoever. He always feels guilty. I tell him he's still better than the guys who are Christian and proud of it, they're not very consistent.
I felt the same. Now that I'm 9 months sober I feel like I'm the only one who's controlled it