Twilight Abyss The best music hurts💔please take care of yourself, hopefully one day you’re able to heal from the experiences/people that have hurt you.
My little brother walked in on me one night and said he couldn’t sleep cause I was crying. He walked up to me and sat next to me on the bed and watched me cry for about a minute until he put his cheek on my shoulder. He told me “sissy don’t be sad” and he hugged my arm. I felt so loved that night. I knew if I took my life I wouldn’t be able to give my brother the love and support he did to me then. Even if it was just a simple hug it meant the world to me. 💔
The amazing thing is that NF is so versatile. Sometimes I want to get hype and listen to his hype songs. Sometimes I like to put this on and lay in bed.
Sadness meter Lv.1 paralyzed NF Lv.2 trauma NF Lv.3 Lost in the moment NF Lv.4 how could you leave us NF (I cried on the last one, who the hell wouldn't?)
what other lies have you heard besides: *”I’m here for you”* *”you can trust me”* *”i’ll never leave you”* *”i only want you”* and the worst one: *”i love you”*
I traded possible joy when this girl told me me she loved me for the first time but my gut told me she didn't mean it and It was right. She was seeing someone else along side me glad I walked away prior to knowing the full situation.
When you're getting hurt from everyone in your life, and you want to cry, to scream but you can't... You also want to die, but you can't... You want to disappear or just fall asleep and never wake up again.... But you can't even frigging fall asleep because of those thoughts and you feel too weak to do literally anything... That's when you know, that you're fu*ked up :(
I don't need people to spend hours talking to me or listening to me or even advising me...I just need someone,even a single person who will randomly hug me for minutes and hold me tight whenever they see I go quiet and doze off staring at empty space. Or even like once in a while just to let me feel that warmth.Even the hug of a stranger feels so warm at times when your sadness gets the best of you.
you will find them don't give up hope because the second you do is when you lose that chance to find them. Do not settle for a cold embrace of loneliness or the cold embrace of someone that does not care. You deserve a warm hug from someone that cares. You will find it. Don't give up.
I get that. Sometimes all I want is for someone to just ask if I’m ok just once and hug me when I’m not. I smile but on the inside I’m screaming for help but can’t bring myself to ask for it.
Hey can u tell me where your located. I heard your message loud and clear and I have felt that pain too many times to ever say that I am going to pass up this opportunity to at least do my best to save every penny I can to come to wherever you are and make that happen for you! That could have saved me from so much trauma and so much pain that took away my family and every white decision I fought to keep and made possible the path of which has brought me to this place to know exactly what it is that you are asking and portraying is not something that a lot of people would be willing to do or to even say they understand or for many like to complain. But I am telling you with all of my heart I have a passion to make a business for things just like this where we give this sort of time and effort in a volunteer situation along with a gift of a Year's worth of mental Health, treatment that's not what the doctors or the professionals would say would kill us as they are not in our place where no one calls no one asked if we could use any help or for that matter give a damn that we're even alive and don't call us or even act as if they were happy that that suicide attempt didn't take our lives and honestly more times than not for me I feel like they already decided I died and I'm not worth taking the time or fulfilling a need and that's what made me wholeheartedly decide that even though I'm on disability and can barely get by I am going to do whatever I can to fulfill this for you whether it's me personally or for the area in which you live making my first priority to make a non-profit business or place that people can go and get exactly that 10 minutes of someone just hearing me vent, or a hug that sincere where I can cry and I can scream and I can let my snots get all over without thinking am I judged am I never going to get the love that I deserve and I should have from the beginning as if somehow you're not worthy of the millionaire or the person who sits in a box and is actually more likely to be uplifting and from all of these places in life that I put a circumstance into place hoping that this could at least give you the hope for today I am hoping that you know you
And every last person who hears this message and need someone to speak to which I cannot always say that I'll be there because I suffer in my own ways where I stuff and I wait to the point where I have to go to the hospital and stay for months or days it depends who has portrayed even little bit of needs I asked in the first place that put them as important and see that I can't live without it if they choose not to fulfill or just completely ignore me and pretend like I'm not here. So from this day forward I'm giving you permission to text me or call me but you must explain to me where it is you heard my name because if I do not trust the decision or the person in which has left this message as an honest or reason for reaching out is to be a person who takes advantage or uses me as their punching bag literally or decides to squat in my house because I give and I give with no expectation of anything in return is what I'm kind of fearing at this time while I'm putting this message out there for you and others to know that today I'm saying this is okay but there are certain boundaries that you cannot go above and beyond to portray no respect or way in which I could actually feel comfortable with continuing to allow the phone number email and whatever it is that people need from me to be there then I will have to take this down so I'm asking for all to understand that I have the ability to see right through a situation from the very beginning yeah I many times decide to give people the benefit of the doubt and hurt me if they decide either way then that's my choice to say okay I'm going to have to do this in a different way so I'm here I'm there I'm anywhere that you guys need me at any point because that's the one thing that could have saved my whole entire nightmare that I can't seem to escape or find the door in which takes me to the path that I was meant for. I'm not going to use those empty words like I love you I'm sorry you're hurting or I feel your pain because the words have been spoken to me a thousand times only rubbing the alcohol to the open wound and causing even more trauma and pain that I wasn't ready to take in as a hug a sacrifice or a reasonable time to say hey I'm here just call me vent as many hours as you need if you don't want advice or if you don't want to response just let me know that ahead of time but please don't say I'm sorry please don't say I'll be there please don't say you're going to do all these things that not one time and the last 10 years have you backed up with actions that proved what you supposedly were speaking but none of your words ever could or would if your life ended today what I say that was a love that was authentic and portrayed in a way that I would want for someone else to have and to hold and to remember for it didn't fulfill any of my needs in the way that could have changed and made a different way for me to take away from the suffering and the pain that could have portrayed a whole new life if they really contained the proof of life that it needed to take.
It's hard when your trauma started when you were only a toddler or even any age at that matter. Makes you think, is this normal? Idk man but just know that you're not alone. You're not the only one fighting a war between yourself, you're not the only one pulling yourself through hell and back just because you don't know how to handle your emotions. I'm here too ❤ we all are *hugs*
Yk what rlly hurts.... When someone online cares more abt u than anyone irl.... So thank you guys for everything.. taking the time out of ur day to help someone feel worthy of love and care. To feel like they arent alone in this cruel world. GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF U!!
Let it out on paper or in a document. Let the thoughts pour out and secure them close. Then once you have spilled your heart out, pour in some words of encouragement. Try to make those thoughts into positives ones, try to slowly turn them around so that at least while you sit silently you have a smile on your face.
Anyone else feel like they wanna cry and cry and scream and just release all of the pain? Anyone else feel like they're done being nice and taken advantage of? Anyone feel tired of being pushed around by your friends? Anyone else just wanna die? Anyone feel like me?
I feel you there... I have always been the one who gives hugs and never get one from someone else. that's when I thought "why am I being sad and feeling empty, I still got my self who I can really trust and love"
Yea :( definitely. I walked out of my home yesterday, because it’s really toxic there.. Sorry you have to go through that, hope you’re in a better place now
Ikr I actually started cutting because of my mom But now i do it every time i don't make a friendship who's sad happy, or just don't realize they're not okay Like i kinda punish myself... I HAVE to be there for them though... I HAVE to recognize the someone when they're sad... I HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO COMFORT THEM BUT I JUST DON'T... I FREAKIN DON'T... I feel like i'm a really bad friend sometimes...
@@denki_kaminari_the_human_c8488 And then you get those annoying people who tell you how "special" your mom is or how "lucky" you are. They're so ignorant. Birth parents aren't great simply because they birthed you! I'm sorry you're going through that though. Dealing with toxic parents really messes up our self confidence and mental health.
Today I was sitting in my English class we were signed to read. I was listening to this song while reading but the lyrics got to me and suddenly I was crying silently. Just thinking about how much I lost, the friends who stabbed me in the back, people walking out of my life, my pathetic excuse of a love life and me failing at everything. This song hit me on an emotional level like I haven’t felt this much pain since the first guy I ever loved who cheated on me. Nothing is worst then silently crying to yourself while no one noticed, I have been blasting this song all day since English, and this has became my favorite song. Because I haven’t been hit with a more powerful song in a while, and this song makes me stop and realize everything around me. To my friends, my family, my depression and the pain I carry around. I’m so glad that my saddest that aches my heart found me to this song! 💗💜
omg whoever that guy was, you deserve better xx you deserve someone who looks for you and only you xx someone who treats you like the queen you are, those ppl who walked out your life? they don't know what they're missing, your love life? if your never sad you don't know happy, they'll be a guy who loves you for you, your not failing at everything, your making decisions for yourself and if they don't go well your making it work and your improvising, however your doing you're doing really good xx there's someone for you out there xx keep your head high
I feel a similarity in my case. This song showed me, how much I have lost in my life. I lost my father 2,5 years ago, when I was 14, lost my grandma 2 months ago, who had a special place in my heart. In my family there is a big fight when we meet. I received so much mental pain when I was in school, which was so bad I'm still struggling with my depression for 6,5 years now. And if that's not enough, I had a crush at colleague of mine for months and after winter break, she told me that she has somebody else. Silly me, expecting people to love me. I feel you 💓
The worst part of it is asking for help and have no one hear you, screaming for someone to notice that you are in pain, have someone care for you and not just tell you that you are gonna be fine and that it will get better. Crying to sleep every night feeling like you aren’t enough, pretending that you are ok to make everyone around you happy. Have all the motivation you had drain out of your body, losing yourself and have to pretend like your fine. Hating everything you once loved. Hurting yourself to feel something, anything, just trying to feel something other than pain and hurt...
You are strong enough to push past the pain, the sadness, and despair. do not let your tears turn cold, let them burn hot with passion, turn your sobs into growls and from there into a roar of defiance. Do not settle for being fine because you are not going to be when you settle for what you have currently. You deserve better, but this cruel cold world will not hand you happiness without a fight. Fight. Fight for a better tomorrow. You are the only one that can make your life better. You will be happy again, and you will feel your other dormant emotions soon. The negative is only a part of the story, unearth the positive. Please, you can do this!
for me it's not even that , it's more like i'm emotionally numb and just here but with my cat zoey it's like the old me is trying to come out and stay hopeful . i know better than to get my hopes up
Sometimes survival is only because you’d rather spite the ones that refused to help. The ones that were ok with your choice. Live, just to piss them off.
"It's my fault, I know I'm selfish Stand alone, my soul is jealous" Hit me hard especially now when that's exactly how I feel... kinda wish I could go back in time at least 2 years so I could fix things I can't change now.
I have listened to this song 5 times I'm crying my eyes out and holding my pillow trying not to wake anybody. This song got me. So friggin relatable, I hope none of y'all are feeling my pain right now... EDIT: I am better now. every single person that commented on this thank you. It has been three months and I am stronger, I am still struggling but I don't think it will never be a struggle. I AM BETTER, that is all I wanted. I know y'all can get through this. Thank you
Does anyone else know that feeling when you just wanna cry because you know it's gonna help but you can't? Like your heart has been aching for so long that you just got used to it and now you don't feel anymore? I sometimes just sit and force tears because I wanna cry and feel better.
Try to isolate yourself in a Room, and then allow yourself to cry. You might not make it at the first time, but dont listen to your mind telling you to not cry because its "weak" or "pathethic" or "coward". Crying is a sign of STRENGTH, not weakness. Society always tells that "men dont cry" but its NOT TRUE, and it doesnt have to be just because THEY Said so. Allow yourself to be vulnerable with yourself first(then maybe, with people you feel confortable with).
@@shannawilliams7774 Yeah but we hide so no one has to feel the burden that we put on ourselves everyday. We don't want them to go through that pain cause we know how it is.
"trade my joy for my protection" really hit me different. i used to be that kid who like to being in crowded, social butterfly, and the life of the party. but i realized something, get dissapointed, hurt by my love ones and have through so many hard times that i believed still gonna come in the future. then now i'm being the opposite of my old-me, i trade my joy of "having fun" for protect myself hurts by my own expectation about others.
My daily disappointment meter resets every day. That is no exaggeration or joke. So I feel where you are coming from. But, you do not have to be hurt by the fact you protect yourself, embrace your inner peace that you may find, then once you have found it share it with the few you can share it with even if its total strangers
i can't deal with all the depressing comments. it breaks my heart that so many people suffer.I'm just so sorry... i'm tearing up while writing this I want to help but i dont know how ... don't kill yourselves , please .
I know this was like five months ago,sorry haha. But some people say things like what the comments say because they want people who don't know them personally to see and hear the pain their in because people in their lives always say 'I understand' or 'I'm here for you' when they don't want to hear it. And this comment brought me to fr tears.
This was posted 6 mouths before I saw it and I'm understanding a lot of what you said but I'm still gonna struggle even if you say "I'm sorry." Its not gonna do anything sorry to break it to you.
most people wouldn’t care, let alone make their cars available and known to everyone, so thank you, truely. more people like you is what we need, you truely make the world a better place, remember that
I have anxiety and depression and I always bottle up my feelings but right now I just want to scream and shout and just break all the rules for once... Even if it's just ONCE.
yeah... i've got a circle of friends but I've always felt like i have no one to lean on... i once opened up then my friend just told me that im just dramatic. :)
Same same loneliness is killing me ... i'm dying slowly and slowly, i have some people who claim themselves as my bestfriends but they did never asked about how am i doing ... i'm tired
"Watch them laugh at all my secrets. Screamed and yelled, but I feel speechless." ~ Cause you sat there and told everyone when I told only you, thinking I could trust you. "Grab my hand, I'm drowning." ~ Drowning in my depression and you don't seem to noticed even if I make it so obvious. "Traumas, they surround me. I wish you'd just love me back." ~ Knowing about my trust issues, you sit there and play with my feelings. Bringing up all the bad that has happened before, I just wish you actually meant what you say to me.
My mom did shit like this to me in 2019 when I was going through shit myself. I told her I was becoming suicidal and she laughed and mocked me.Later on that year, she said I was a manipulative brat who was manipulating my friends and everyone around me. She even interfered with the chance of me actually getting some help. All I wanted was that: help. Because she was never there for me, other people had to be. Other adults around me had to be and they saw me every day and watched my every move. Where were her eyes? Absolutely nowhere. And now she acts like she's going to be there for me when she wasn't before and she literally doesn't understand that she really broke my trust. She really hurt me and she really fucking broke me. I just want you to know that you are loved. I seriously don't want to let anyone else experience the pain I did. Our pain is possibly different and so may our stories with more of the context behind them, but from what I read, it sounds so familiar. I just hope you're doing okay as of right now and that this shit isn't continuing on. You deserve happiness and love. I don't have to know you to just know that. You deserve better.
I have an eating disorder... and when I told my father, he instantly ran to my uncle and him... and our whole family... and then they made jokes about it or bad comments all the time, and I ran away with the excuse I had to go to the toilet with tears in my eyes... everyone saw that and nobody did something! Everything is just shitty right now
@@Haramglizzy he doesn't man. He loves you so much he sent his son to die for your sins. No matter what you "feel", know that it's true. As I tuck my boy's in at night, even though they get on my nerves sometimes, I don't think I'd be willing to make that sacrifice of my son, knowing full well the other person may reciprocate. I lost my dad at 10, my mom almost died when I was a senior, and my wife has gone through medical hell with SSCD and Dandy Walker malformation for the last year. Not to mention the medical Bill's. But, I know regardless of what this world throws at me, he showed his Love by sacrificing his son for my messes, along with yours. He loves you man. Regardless of what it looks like, he loves you.
@@Haramglizzy it's no thing. Life is hard. Hang in there. I pray that God opens your eyes and makes you perceptive of his Love. He has a plan for your life. If you want to see it, read the book of John.
Travis Cooper either he helps me or he kills me I’m pretty close to killing my self so If he still wants to abandon me he should go ahead but I hope he knows that I’m begging and crying even tho I get nothing back
kids in my class listing to music : happy song, the Friday song, cha cha slide, all the happy upbeat songs Then there is me and like one friend from my old school : NF, nickle Back, my chemical romance, lil happy little sad, three day grace, skillet, ashes remain, and etc
This hits really hard emotionally. I NEED music like this. People putting my feelings into words for me when I can’t. Makes me feel way less lonely in life. At least someone else feels the way I do/have
i feel you and i used to now i just survive another day of the same thing , except my cat she helps fill a emotional hole and emotional scars left by many betrayals and people
Ive struggled with loving myself my whole life because I was bullied in school and many of my teenage years were spent alone crying, ive had a gun to my head and was too much of a coward to pull the trigger but ive since realized that death is final and problems normally get fixed or go away with enough time... Hang in there
This song makes me think of all the times people said they understood and would have my back but as soon as I had an issue they said it was to much to handle. They always leave
that just proves how strong u are, u Managed to fight even when no one was there, if they're not gonna be there at your worst they don't get to be there at your best, I hope you're doing okay, how are you?
I understand this, because I struggle with this myself. Not as a person on your side, but on the opposite. I tend to avoid people I’ve become close to, in fear of making them leave me first. I’m trying to fix that, but as with all things, it’s a work in progress. I assume people are treating you this way because they feel they are incapable of making any meaningful change in your life, and scared that if they attempt to do so, they will fail and all the blame will be put on them. People also don’t want to expend much energy without a clear payoff, and helping people is always a gamble. That’s in no way applicable to anyone, but that’s how I am. That’s not your fault, of course. It takes a particularly strong person to follow through with that type of promise, knowing fully there’s no incentive other than wishing for you to get better. Most people aren’t strong. Im not trying to make excuses or anything, because I understand that this type of behavior is, for lack of better terms, incredibly annoying to deal with, but that’s my thoughts on the matter.
My wife of 8 months left me in 2 weeks with no explanation or emotion. We were together for 7 years and everything seemed good. We had a lot plans for the future. The bottom is how I feel. “Give me peace then you steal it” “Grab my hand I’m drowning” “ I wish you just love me back” I cry every time 😢😢😢
Oh my gawd I'm so sorry....Hey but ur not alone my dad left me when I was a kid and gave my half brother up for adoption and now he has his own family.....which kills me......but ur not alone dude...And btw how old ru I am 14
I am on a NF marathon right now, My girl just dumped me.She was the first girl I've truly cared about. It hurt when she broke up with me and I can barely handle day to day stuff anymore. She really did a number on me, I try to seem happy but I can barely do it. Its worse when I see her, I can't even look at her without tearing up. I wrote a song the other day about suicide because I can't handle it anymore.
you know that you connect to music when you can close your eyes and hear every single individual instrument playing along with the sweet tone of the voice. could fall asleep simply just connecting to a song.
Amauria Denmark EmiNem jUsT rAps. eminem created NF's entire career. eminem put his pain out in songs too. his mother kicked him out the house, his wife cheated, his dad left, he couldnt afford food for his kids. hes actually attempted to overdose and shoot himself. he talks about all of that. i know for a fact you aint never listen to eminem. u think hes just some fast rapping drug addicted washed up rapper. go take a listen at his older sad songs and you'd see just how much of nf is eminem.
"Trade My Joy for my protection" hits me hard it reminds me of my mom and how i cant be happy around her cuz of all the yelling, trauma, pain and abuse... and "Traumas, they surround me I wish you'd just love me back" also hits hard just wanting to feel love and the fact that I cant see that my life was bad a few years ago.
My traumas are so messed up. I got bullied for showing emotions like fear and sadness. And I got sexually harassed two times. So my traumas are like this: I can't cry in front of other people, because every time I cry, the tears feel like fire on my skin.They burn my skin and hurt me with that. I try to not cry, but with that it gets harder to breath. My heart beats so fast that it hurts. I feel fear every time someone sees me cry, fear of being laughed at again. Fear of being called bad nicknames again, like crybaby. Fear of people pushing me against walls and making me cry, just so they have something to laugh at. I am scared that when people see me cry that they feel happy and try to make me scared or sad on purpose again. And that is where my second trauma comes from, too. People can't touch me at some places. Like my shoulders, belly, neck, throat, legs or even arms sometimes. People can't hug me for too long or too tight, because I get massive panic attacks. If I am so much scared I can't help but cry, but this makes me everything worse. I just can't breath in that moment, which makes me even more scared. It hurts like hell to live with both. But the thing I hate most is how the people who I love need to treat me different. I hate how my friends and family can't hug me too long or give me comfort when I cry. I hate to know that they feel bad, because they can'T help me. Words can't help me and they can't hug me and tell me everything is going to be better, because if they hug me or see me cry, they make everything worse.
Then take the fight to the dispair, do not let it control you anymore. You need to find a point where you refuse to take the abuse from your own thoughts. You cannot control everyone elses bullshit, but you can control yours through lots of effort. But, that effort is worth it. Imagine bouncing off a negative thought like deflecting a punch or a bullet bouncing of wonder woman's shield. Find strength. Find peace. But, most importantly, find yourself, so that you can save her. Because only you can do that. Do it, not for anyone else but yourself because you deserve better than what this world gives you. Now take it.
"Why haven't you found me yet? I hold you so proudly." That lyric has a special meaning to me. My neighbor who basically raised me moved away for college 7 years ago. She said she would come back for me. She hasn't come back yet. I miss her a lot. I talk about her all the time. I don't know if she even remembers I exist. I still love her and want for her to come back for me. Calypso, if you ever see this, please find me. It's not that hard. I haven't moved far. Please. I need you now more than ever because the traumas really are surrounding me. I'm drowning and I might not make it. Please come help me.
people serve their purpose for us. We cannot control the length and it always hurts when they leave, but now you have a choice. You either stay in the lighthouse and hope the ship comes home, or you can press on and if the ship returns one day then embrace it with open arms. Do not forget the good she did, but do not use it as your only means of escape from the traumas. You cannot give in. You are strong and you will swim. You will swim so far.
I have severe ptsd from lots of trauma… this song just explains perfectly how I feel inside and so I used this video/song to explain how I’ve been feeling and trying to properly express my emotions
If NF would have a concert i would suport everything for him i love his music so much it touches me every damn time every song he writes i feel like someone understands me that i am not totally alone
Its a conversation I have with myself everyday. It's the war within myself after all the abuse and trauma I've gone through it's just hard not to melt when he speaking the words I say everyday.
I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my UA-cam channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. 💙❤
A.S. Minor subbed ... huge advocate for mental health awareness myself as someone who’s been diagnosed with various mental illnesses ... keep doing what you do, with love ❤️
people like you should exist more nowadays that we need them. keep doing what youre doing, wish you the best in everything. may god bless your beautiful heart ❤️
"Grab my hand I'm drowning, I feel my heart pounding, why haven't you found me yet? I hold you so proudly, traumas they surround me, I wish you'd just love me back.." That really hits me because i broke up with my boy about 3 months ago and one day really recently i texted him saying 'missing you..' and he replied with 'what should i say? its cute that you still miss me but..' then i put 'i know i should move on..' then he hit me with 'its not that.. its cute you miss me but i've moved on to someone else.. you need to find your someone, you might think you need me but i am not the one you need.. you'll find him soon'. i burst out into tears because i know its hard to love someone that doesnt like you an doesn't wanna be your friend.. 20 minutes later i texted him saying 'i hope she keeps you safe and happy' and he replied with 'thank you for not being rude about this..' and i said 'well i still have alot of feelings for you and i dont think im ever gonna give them up.. and i dont wanna ever put pressure on you..'. he replied with 'you never will and never have put pressure on me. thank you for being there'. he didn't realise how much he had *_broke_* me.. edit: I'm a mess now.. I feel horrible and i have too many regrets in life.. I kinda wish i didn't just agree when he said he that it wasn't working out, i wish i had been kinder and tried to act happier. maybe he wouldn't of left me.. I am worthless now, many of Nathan's songs hits me to hard that i just cry. i am now obsessed with NF and his music, he is one of the only reasons i am alive.
@@zrbotix Just because we don't know you doesn't mean we can't help you too. I love to help people so I'd be glad to help you too. And I can feel the pain you feel too but with someone who was much closer to me. My dad.. he just isn't the man I remember before I was 10. I mean sure he was abusive but I stilled loved him. Now I've just been having hard times with life myself. But I find comfort in friends like you should. Find someone who is close to you and talk to them about it. And don't worry you'll find your special someone. I just know it. They may be sitting in front of you and you don't know. Just be patient and that one person who is meant for you will come to you eventually. I'm only a 12 but I am already looking for my special someone cause I can't wait to fall into the person's arms and be theres forever ^^ Don't lose faith yet girl. I got your back
@@coco1113 Thanks I guess, I'm pretty young too.. I'm 11. I have had an interest in relationships ever since i was 8, but I never had realised that they could hurt so badly. But.. Thank you so much for sharing this, and thank you for uh well... 'being there' but you know... I don't feel as bad as I used to.. I still feel that emptiness and I miss him and everything but still... I am a bit better... The thing that hurts the most at the moment is these two facts: He doesn't wanna talk and I don't think he ever will want to talk, as he has lost interest in me and he never seems sad or even aware that he hurt me. And also that he has moved on and will never fit perfectly in my arms because we weren't the right pair. But thank you, I don't know how many times I'm gonna say this but thank you...
As someone with ptsd this is so real it helps me feel so much more heard and if anyone her is going though anything bad her is a quote that is the only reason I am alive “taking you life is not freedom it is taking that pain and suffering from you and putting it on everyone that would have tried so hard to help you and then it never stops”
A year ago, my bestfriend got really drunk. He was being super cheerful, until he texted me, asking me not to leave him. His simple text made me feel so loved and cared, i stopped trying to end my life. The pain is still there, but at least, i have a reason to stay.
I listened to this non stop when my ex cheated on me - I was heartbroken at how he was treating me. It’s refreshing listening to it and I haven’t spoke to him in months. I’m a lot happier now.
This song is literally everything I feel but don’t know how to explain. I’ve never had a song describe the way I feel so perfectly. Thank you, NF. Thank you for finding the words I couldn’t.
The worst pain, in this entire world, is seeing how many of us, are being effected by this sinister thing call, "Depression". The sickest part is, that it may result in death.. Stay strong, okay love? Not for anyone, but you! Whoever is reading this, you matter to me. Stay with us! 🤗😚❤
Hey you. Yeah, you! Yeah, I'm talking to you. Stop scrolling. Listen to me please. We are completely strangers. But please, smile for me. Aww...Look, that smile looks so good on you. Please always keep that smile. I know if your going through a hard time... But life isn't bad, it's just some moments in life are bad. Never give up. To see the good days pass through bad days. And one day you'll be proud of yourself you didn't give up and continued to see the rainbow fighting in the storm. You matter to me💜. You are beautiful. And my prayers always stick with you no matter who you are. (not my words but need to be shared)
I want to thank a friend of mine for showing me this song and thank NF for releasing this wonderfully emotional song. This is my new favorite song since Why Would You Leave Us. It's sad, wonderful, powerful, thought-inducing, etc. By far my favorite on the album.
Today's my Birthday and I'm here crying, I just can't feel happiness anymore. Ik I'm happy some days but it all ends up in me being in my room over thinking everything.
Anyone else wanna cry but for some reason can’t and just want the empty space inside of them filled but it can only be filled by 1 person, And that one person just left and you felt like nothing
4 months ago I was diagnosed with depression and I haven't cried for about a year but this song triggered something that made want to cry. Even though I didn't shed tears, it shows that I can still be able to cry someday.
This song hit me really hard. Just the music alone is just a powerful message and combined with the lyrics it just hits the heart. I love nf so much like all of his songs really help me connect to my real problems and real people. Were all dealing with our own problems and his songs help me personally get through some of my problems especially with my relationships in the past. Sometimes I just stare at the ceiling and listen to his songs. They make me feel more powerful and I feel like their just telling their own stories that I relate to and just listening to them helps me get through tough days. Never stop nf...
Anyone ever feel like just crying so hard but you’ve been crying so much that there aren’t any tears left so you just sit in silence listening and feeling numb.
I can relate to this song so much, especially about my family and friends, I have borderline personality disorder, and so it is really hard when the people who say they care about you don’t do anything to help, but because they may be “the favorite person” it completely destroys you when they don’t reciprocate like you want them to... it hurts like absolute hell
when someone asks me: "how are you?" i always reply with: "im fine" but in reality: confused, broken, betrayed, never good enough, anxious, fragile, im falling apart but you dont notice it, annoying, defeated, pathetic, rejected, lonely
For more amazing music check out my Spotify playlist here: bit.ly/CLDYChill
Cloudy bro you killed me in GTA 5 a Second ago
Cloudy this song is so gorgeous i could cry 🥺💛
I'm crying 😭💕 I gone through so much.
Reply to what?, Won't let me!
@@tearfilledrum it isn't his song ahahahah it's from NF
Desperation. Love. Validation. This song is a beautifully tragic masterpiece
I couldn't've described it better.
Too much in the feels dept. Cried at this one. Way too relateable.
Twilight Abyss The best music hurts💔please take care of yourself, hopefully one day you’re able to heal from the experiences/people that have hurt you.
My little brother walked in on me one night and said he couldn’t sleep cause I was crying.
He walked up to me and sat next to me on the bed and watched me cry for about a minute until he put his cheek on my shoulder. He told me “sissy don’t be sad” and he hugged my arm.
I felt so loved that night. I knew if I took my life I wouldn’t be able to give my brother the love and support he did to me then. Even if it was just a simple hug it meant the world to me. 💔
i don’t have my youngest brother anymore so please stay for yours 💙 i wish i could have more of those beautiful moments.
@@icedcoffeeandbookss I'm so sorry for your loss..
Hey stay strong ❤️
Felt that. But nobody notices when im ready to take my life till I try to attempt again
🥺💕
Don't get me wrong. I love his rapping songs but... it's nice to hear such a lovely and relatable song. My favourite so far
The amazing thing is that NF is so versatile. Sometimes I want to get hype and listen to his hype songs. Sometimes I like to put this on and lay in bed.
Sammee
same I love his singing and rapping voice.
Same plus his singing voice is good
Ok I don't get you wrong 👌🏻.
"Ask for help you call it weakness"
"Lied and promised me my freedom"
These lines hit so hard
Facts I relate to them
Sadness meter
Lv.1 paralyzed NF
Lv.2 trauma NF
Lv.3 Lost in the moment NF
Lv.4 how could you leave us NF
(I cried on the last one, who the hell wouldn't?)
I cried at how could you leave us because it's sad and my dad overdosed so it's relatable
"Mansion" from a couple albums back deserves to be on that list. Are you familiar with it?
Last 1 is so relatable lmfao I cried
JustAnotherMonday add lost in the moment to this
Lost in the moment
"I wish you'd just love me back".. that got me 😟
Abbi ThePro me n you both
Got me 2
Those words gets me every time
that makes two of us:(
The whole song got me, what ya talking bout?.
what other lies have you heard besides:
*”I’m here for you”*
*”you can trust me”*
*”i’ll never leave you”*
*”i only want you”*
and the worst one:
*”i love you”*
" its going to be okay" is the biggest bullshit of the century
"I'm not seeing your homie"this generation is fucked truth be said
I traded possible joy when this girl told me me she loved me for the first time but my gut told me she didn't mean it and It was right. She was seeing someone else along side me glad I walked away prior to knowing the full situation.
I love you
I'll never lay a hand on you or I'll never hurt you 😭💔 yet that's exactly wha happened
When you're getting hurt from everyone in your life, and you want to cry, to scream but you can't... You also want to die, but you can't... You want to disappear or just fall asleep and never wake up again.... But you can't even frigging fall asleep because of those thoughts and you feel too weak to do literally anything... That's when you know, that you're fu*ked up :(
Me rn I just want to give up on everything
Spot on
You are not alone 💜
true
🥺🥺
"Traumas they surround me, I wish you'd just love me back." Felt. That.
me to
that goes to my dad.
me to my dad lmao :)
that part makes me wanna cry.
Reminds me of my mother
am I the only one that has to force tears because it feels good?
I don’t even have to try they just come even when I’m not sad :/
I can't cry for some reason even when i see something sad.
I hope i would cry....
I'm just not used to, but i really want
sometimes i just cry
@@liar4323 I know right? That's the worst feeling ever!!
-What makes you happy?
-sad songs .
-and , what makes you sad?
-happy songs :|
Wow really?!
I can't relate much more. ")
:)
That’s me in a shell
Same
•Mel -chan• mood...
“Traumas they surround me, I wish you’d just love me back”
Hitting anyone else hard?
Naw
Yeah
Me
I haven’t felt like this since paralyzed 😢
Same
Og song
Sameee
Paralized, Trauma, Hurt(witt lowry) , hollow (ivan b). Might help y'all..
Same..
I don't need people to spend hours talking to me or listening to me or even advising me...I just need someone,even a single person who will randomly hug me for minutes and hold me tight whenever they see I go quiet and doze off staring at empty space.
Or even like once in a while just to let me feel that warmth.Even the hug of a stranger feels so warm at times when your sadness gets the best of you.
you will find them don't give up hope because the second you do is when you lose that chance to find them. Do not settle for a cold embrace of loneliness or the cold embrace of someone that does not care. You deserve a warm hug from someone that cares. You will find it. Don't give up.
Hey I love you ❤️ * virtual tight hug*
I get that. Sometimes all I want is for someone to just ask if I’m ok just once and hug me when I’m not. I smile but on the inside I’m screaming for help but can’t bring myself to ask for it.
Hey can u tell me where your located. I heard your message loud and clear and I have felt that pain too many times to ever say that I am going to pass up this opportunity to at least do my best to save every penny I can to come to wherever you are and make that happen for you! That could have saved me from so much trauma and so much pain that took away my family and every white decision I fought to keep and made possible the path of which has brought me to this place to know exactly what it is that you are asking and portraying is not something that a lot of people would be willing to do or to even say they understand or for many like to complain. But I am telling you with all of my heart I have a passion to make a business for things just like this where we give this sort of time and effort in a volunteer situation along with a gift of a Year's worth of mental Health, treatment that's not what the doctors or the professionals would say would kill us as they are not in our place where no one calls no one asked if we could use any help or for that matter give a damn that we're even alive and don't call us or even act as if they were happy that that suicide attempt didn't take our lives and honestly more times than not for me I feel like they already decided I died and I'm not worth taking the time or fulfilling a need and that's what made me wholeheartedly decide that even though I'm on disability and can barely get by I am going to do whatever I can to fulfill this for you whether it's me personally or for the area in which you live making my first priority to make a non-profit business or place that people can go and get exactly that 10 minutes of someone just hearing me vent, or a hug that sincere where I can cry and I can scream and I can let my snots get all over without thinking am I judged am I never going to get the love that I deserve and I should have from the beginning as if somehow you're not worthy of the millionaire or the person who sits in a box and is actually more likely to be uplifting and from all of these places in life that I put a circumstance into place hoping that this could at least give you the hope for today I am hoping that you know you
And every last person who hears this message and need someone to speak to which I cannot always say that I'll be there because I suffer in my own ways where I stuff and I wait to the point where I have to go to the hospital and stay for months or days it depends who has portrayed even little bit of needs I asked in the first place that put them as important and see that I can't live without it if they choose not to fulfill or just completely ignore me and pretend like I'm not here. So from this day forward I'm giving you permission to text me or call me but you must explain to me where it is you heard my name because if I do not trust the decision or the person in which has left this message as an honest or reason for reaching out is to be a person who takes advantage or uses me as their punching bag literally or decides to squat in my house because I give and I give with no expectation of anything in return is what I'm kind of fearing at this time while I'm putting this message out there for you and others to know that today I'm saying this is okay but there are certain boundaries that you cannot go above and beyond to portray no respect or way in which I could actually feel comfortable with continuing to allow the phone number email and whatever it is that people need from me to be there then I will have to take this down so I'm asking for all to understand that I have the ability to see right through a situation from the very beginning yeah I many times decide to give people the benefit of the doubt and hurt me if they decide either way then that's my choice to say okay I'm going to have to do this in a different way so I'm here I'm there I'm anywhere that you guys need me at any point because that's the one thing that could have saved my whole entire nightmare that I can't seem to escape or find the door in which takes me to the path that I was meant for. I'm not going to use those empty words like I love you I'm sorry you're hurting or I feel your pain because the words have been spoken to me a thousand times only rubbing the alcohol to the open wound and causing even more trauma and pain that I wasn't ready to take in as a hug a sacrifice or a reasonable time to say hey I'm here just call me vent as many hours as you need if you don't want advice or if you don't want to response just let me know that ahead of time but please don't say I'm sorry please don't say I'll be there please don't say you're going to do all these things that not one time and the last 10 years have you backed up with actions that proved what you supposedly were speaking but none of your words ever could or would if your life ended today what I say that was a love that was authentic and portrayed in a way that I would want for someone else to have and to hold and to remember for it didn't fulfill any of my needs in the way that could have changed and made a different way for me to take away from the suffering and the pain that could have portrayed a whole new life if they really contained the proof of life that it needed to take.
It's hard when your trauma started when you were only a toddler or even any age at that matter. Makes you think, is this normal? Idk man but just know that you're not alone. You're not the only one fighting a war between yourself, you're not the only one pulling yourself through hell and back just because you don't know how to handle your emotions. I'm here too ❤ we all are *hugs*
That's so sweet you made my day better 🥺 thank you ❤🖤
I can relate it really is hard
Awww
*Hugs*
Thanks for that!!
No problem, I hope life treats you better! 💖
I really needed to hear this
Yk what rlly hurts....
When someone online cares more abt u than anyone irl....
So thank you guys for everything.. taking the time out of ur day to help someone feel worthy of love and care. To feel like they arent alone in this cruel world. GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF U!!
I have so many friends on online that help me but barely have any in real life to help me
I feel you bro.
Why can't I cry anymore? All I ever do is stay silent all day. I have so much in my head.
Let it out on paper or in a document. Let the thoughts pour out and secure them close. Then once you have spilled your heart out, pour in some words of encouragement. Try to make those thoughts into positives ones, try to slowly turn them around so that at least while you sit silently you have a smile on your face.
One day ill go back home. One day ill be at peace
I want to cry too but I can't cuz of this my heart feels so heavy
I felt that
same here bro
Anyone else feel like they wanna cry and cry and scream and just release all of the pain? Anyone else feel like they're done being nice and taken advantage of? Anyone feel tired of being pushed around by your friends? Anyone else just wanna die?
Anyone feel like me?
Amelia Watson I feel you
Yes
Yeah me too
I do.
always
NF gets in my head man
idk how but he hits me in places i hid away from everyone, myself included
Yeah it's like how does he know that
Yes but there is one point that you well brack and live all the same in misery
Same, that's why I can't go to a concert of his or I would cry till I couldn't anymore.
Isabella Tolhoek and Apple Bear same to the infinity
hi i really like your eyes! sorry that it has nothing to do with your comment but just thought of sharing my opinion, have a great day/night! ❤️
20 years and I’ve never felt loved.
A hug feels like everything.
Sadly I have never been hugged.
Would you consider settling for an internet hug? It’s not quite the same thing but it’s the best I can do.
I feel you there... I have always been the one who gives hugs and never get one from someone else. that's when I thought "why am I being sad and feeling empty, I still got my self who I can really trust and love"
Big hugs to all my bros
*hugs you* ♥♥😭😭
I will hug you, hug? 🫂
"Stand alone my soul is jealous
It wants love, but I reject it
Trade my joy for my protection"
Did this hit anyone else?
Vincen Franco omg yes. it hit hard
Yeah me too 🖍🌟🔮🥾🙏🏼
same here
Totally 🥾🔮🌟
It's really poetic
the song hits different when its about a parent :"(
ikr
Yea :( definitely. I walked out of my home yesterday, because it’s really toxic there.. Sorry you have to go through that, hope you’re in a better place now
Very true. In fact, since I've been going through other things atm, I hadn't thought of that too. Damn...
Ikr
I actually started cutting because of my mom
But now i do it every time i don't make a friendship who's sad happy, or just don't realize they're not okay
Like i kinda punish myself... I HAVE to be there for them though... I HAVE to recognize the someone when they're sad... I HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO COMFORT THEM BUT I JUST DON'T... I FREAKIN DON'T... I feel like i'm a really bad friend sometimes...
@@denki_kaminari_the_human_c8488 And then you get those annoying people who tell you how "special" your mom is or how "lucky" you are. They're so ignorant. Birth parents aren't great simply because they birthed you! I'm sorry you're going through that though. Dealing with toxic parents really messes up our self confidence and mental health.
Today I was sitting in my English class we were signed to read. I was listening to this song while reading but the lyrics got to me and suddenly I was crying silently. Just thinking about how much I lost, the friends who stabbed me in the back, people walking out of my life, my pathetic excuse of a love life and me failing at everything.
This song hit me on an emotional level like I haven’t felt this much pain since the first guy I ever loved who cheated on me. Nothing is worst then silently crying to yourself while no one noticed, I have been blasting this song all day since English, and this has became my favorite song. Because I haven’t been hit with a more powerful song in a while, and this song makes me stop and realize everything around me. To my friends, my family, my depression and the pain I carry around. I’m so glad that my saddest that aches my heart found me to this song! 💗💜
omg whoever that guy was, you deserve better xx you deserve someone who looks for you and only you xx someone who treats you like the queen you are, those ppl who walked out your life? they don't know what they're missing, your love life? if your never sad you don't know happy, they'll be a guy who loves you for you, your not failing at everything, your making decisions for yourself and if they don't go well your making it work and your improvising, however your doing you're doing really good xx there's someone for you out there xx keep your head high
I feel a similarity in my case. This song showed me, how much I have lost in my life. I lost my father 2,5 years ago, when I was 14, lost my grandma 2 months ago, who had a special place in my heart. In my family there is a big fight when we meet. I received so much mental pain when I was in school, which was so bad I'm still struggling with my depression for 6,5 years now. And if that's not enough, I had a crush at colleague of mine for months and after winter break, she told me that she has somebody else. Silly me, expecting people to love me. I feel you 💓
i’m not joking i’m in the EXACT same situation rn
:(
The worst part of it is asking for help and have no one hear you, screaming for someone to notice that you are in pain, have someone care for you and not just tell you that you are gonna be fine and that it will get better. Crying to sleep every night feeling like you aren’t enough, pretending that you are ok to make everyone around you happy. Have all the motivation you had drain out of your body, losing yourself and have to pretend like your fine. Hating everything you once loved. Hurting yourself to feel something, anything, just trying to feel something other than pain and hurt...
You are strong enough to push past the pain, the sadness, and despair. do not let your tears turn cold, let them burn hot with passion, turn your sobs into growls and from there into a roar of defiance. Do not settle for being fine because you are not going to be when you settle for what you have currently. You deserve better, but this cruel cold world will not hand you happiness without a fight. Fight. Fight for a better tomorrow. You are the only one that can make your life better. You will be happy again, and you will feel your other dormant emotions soon. The negative is only a part of the story, unearth the positive. Please, you can do this!
for me it's not even that , it's more like i'm emotionally numb and just here but with my cat zoey it's like the old me is trying to come out and stay hopeful . i know better than to get my hopes up
I'm the exact same way. But hey. I noticed. I know its been a year. But I'm noticing your pain.
Sometimes survival is only because you’d rather spite the ones that refused to help. The ones that were ok with your choice.
Live, just to piss them off.
anyone wanna becom friends?
"It's my fault, I know I'm selfish
Stand alone, my soul is jealous"
Hit me hard especially now when that's exactly how I feel... kinda wish I could go back in time at least 2 years so I could fix things I can't change now.
I exactly need past 2 yrs too
I have listened to this song 5 times I'm crying my eyes out and holding my pillow trying not to wake anybody. This song got me. So friggin relatable, I hope none of y'all are feeling my pain right now...
EDIT: I am better now. every single person that commented on this thank you. It has been three months and I am stronger, I am still struggling but I don't think it will never be a struggle. I AM BETTER, that is all I wanted. I know y'all can get through this. Thank you
@@arielrose6680 I just have had alot of things happen in the past and it's been hard on my mental state. Thank you for your concern that made me smile
😥😢
it will get better soon sis keep holding on 💖💖 love xx
I know to if only others did
I feel your pain...... 😭😭
Who is scared of dying but tired of living?
Amen
Yep. I wish so much i could build the courage to kill myself, but eternal nothingness scares me.
@@SuperAdventureR1301 E
Me sadly IM JUST SCARED TO LIVE BUT IM SCARED TO DIE!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭
I'm not living, I am surviving
Does anyone else know that feeling when you just wanna cry because you know it's gonna help but you can't? Like your heart has been aching for so long that you just got used to it and now you don't feel anymore? I sometimes just sit and force tears because I wanna cry and feel better.
How do you force tears? Dealing with the same numb can't cry problem.
I’m in the same situation right now, I REALLY NEED to cry, but my tears won’t come out
Try to isolate yourself in a Room, and then allow yourself to cry. You might not make it at the first time, but dont listen to your mind telling you to not cry because its "weak" or "pathethic" or "coward".
Crying is a sign of STRENGTH, not weakness. Society always tells that "men dont cry" but its NOT TRUE, and it doesnt have to be just because THEY Said so. Allow yourself to be vulnerable with yourself first(then maybe, with people you feel confortable with).
honestly i would do anything to be able to cry again since it will make me feel better the next day
I have not cried and every time I do cry it feels like acid because it hurts so bad
It's such a good feeling when someone can poetically talk about your deepest feelings, And then you scroll down and see more people like you.
Yes! :')
You're right. It's very validating
"I'm fine"
"I'm OK"
"today's had its ups and downs"
-people are so blind
no. people just don't care enough
@@abishaiqbal20 partly true
Doesn’t help that we lie... just saying.
@@shannawilliams7774 Yeah but we hide so no one has to feel the burden that we put on ourselves everyday. We don't want them to go through that pain cause we know how it is.
The one I've always been telling is "I'm tired"
"trade my joy for my protection" really hit me different. i used to be that kid who like to being in crowded, social butterfly, and the life of the party. but i realized something, get dissapointed, hurt by my love ones and have through so many hard times that i believed still gonna come in the future. then now i'm being the opposite of my old-me, i trade my joy of "having fun" for protect myself hurts by my own expectation about others.
My daily disappointment meter resets every day. That is no exaggeration or joke. So I feel where you are coming from. But, you do not have to be hurt by the fact you protect yourself, embrace your inner peace that you may find, then once you have found it share it with the few you can share it with even if its total strangers
Yup, this is afar life does. I use to be the same. Fucking trauma
i can't deal with all the depressing comments. it breaks my heart that so many people suffer.I'm just so sorry...
i'm tearing up while writing this
I want to help but i dont know how ... don't kill yourselves , please .
It's great that his music has touched so many people on an emotional level
But it's heartbreaking to know so many people are struggling
I think most people going through these comments are looking for support, myself included. So, thank you for the support ❤
I know this was like five months ago,sorry haha. But some people say things like what the comments say because they want people who don't know them personally to see and hear the pain their in because people in their lives always say 'I understand' or 'I'm here for you' when they don't want to hear it. And this comment brought me to fr tears.
This was posted 6 mouths before I saw it and I'm understanding a lot of what you said but I'm still gonna struggle even if you say "I'm sorry." Its not gonna do anything sorry to break it to you.
most people wouldn’t care, let alone make their cars available and known to everyone, so thank you, truely. more people like you is what we need, you truely make the world a better place, remember that
I have anxiety and depression and I always bottle up my feelings but right now I just want to scream and shout and just break all the rules for once...
Even if it's just ONCE.
I feel the exact same way.
Same
@@jlockwood65 it’s not that easy 😞
Do it
I thought my depression was killing me but not having anyone here for me when I need a shoulder to lean on is what’s really killing me
yeah... i've got a circle of friends but I've always felt like i have no one to lean on... i once opened up then my friend just told me that im just dramatic. :)
Denise Mendoza You can talk to me... I know you don’t know me but if you want.. here’s my instagram carol_nunez or snapchat carol576. Im here for you!
i love you
Same same loneliness is killing me ... i'm dying slowly and slowly, i have some people who claim themselves as my bestfriends but they did never asked about how am i doing ... i'm tired
ify
“Why haven’t you found me yet?” ....why dad? Why haven’t you?
he will i am sure. update me when he does
Hadeel Abed 🥺💔
Me...
He will find you.
I happy that i don't meet my dad anymore
Mans prolly been kidnapped
NF's songs sounds like spoken poetry ,every line has something deep that just hit you and make you feel vulnerable ..
Don’t pretend to know how someone is feeling because *You will never know exactly how they feel*
Let that sink in.
I'm glad I learnt that a long time back but if I do that I just feel disconnected
So so true !
Thank u...Im tired of people saying they get it when they can never truly feel my heart hurt
There's a difference between understanding and sympathy.
Sometimes feels like I can read people's mind tbh
Who else loves to listen to this stuff when feeling depressed as crap, I'm subscribing NOW, this was posted yesterday? I like it soooo much THANK YOU
trust me🙏
My eyes feel heavy no way wtf how did I cry😭💕
“It wants love but I reject it, trade my joy for my protection” hits me every time. Like a harsh slap from reality.
I dont understand why he is so underrated. He puts out great quality music and lyrics have meaning to them. He deserves so much more credit.
Underrated… yeah no he’s hella famous what you talking about
Prolly My fave song out of The album rn
Same
Sameee
Leave me alone
boi jim bob boi Mine are hate myself and this song!
"Only" was the one for me
"Watch them laugh at all my secrets. Screamed and yelled, but I feel speechless." ~ Cause you sat there and told everyone when I told only you, thinking I could trust you.
"Grab my hand, I'm drowning." ~ Drowning in my depression and you don't seem to noticed even if I make it so obvious.
"Traumas, they surround me. I wish you'd just love me back." ~ Knowing about my trust issues, you sit there and play with my feelings. Bringing up all the bad that has happened before, I just wish you actually meant what you say to me.
My mom did shit like this to me in 2019 when I was going through shit myself. I told her I was becoming suicidal and she laughed and mocked me.Later on that year, she said I was a manipulative brat who was manipulating my friends and everyone around me. She even interfered with the chance of me actually getting some help.
All I wanted was that: help. Because she was never there for me, other people had to be. Other adults around me had to be and they saw me every day and watched my every move. Where were her eyes? Absolutely nowhere.
And now she acts like she's going to be there for me when she wasn't before and she literally doesn't understand that she really broke my trust. She really hurt me and she really fucking broke me.
I just want you to know that you are loved. I seriously don't want to let anyone else experience the pain I did. Our pain is possibly different and so may our stories with more of the context behind them, but from what I read, it sounds so familiar. I just hope you're doing okay as of right now and that this shit isn't continuing on. You deserve happiness and love. I don't have to know you to just know that. You deserve better.
I have an eating disorder... and when I told my father, he instantly ran to my uncle and him... and our whole family... and then they made jokes about it or bad comments all the time, and I ran away with the excuse I had to go to the toilet with tears in my eyes... everyone saw that and nobody did something!
Everything is just shitty right now
Man...deep.
He's like a modern day King David, pouring out his Psalms to God.
Travis Cooper why does God hate me so much
@@Haramglizzy he doesn't man. He loves you so much he sent his son to die for your sins. No matter what you "feel", know that it's true.
As I tuck my boy's in at night, even though they get on my nerves sometimes, I don't think I'd be willing to make that sacrifice of my son, knowing full well the other person may reciprocate. I lost my dad at 10, my mom almost died when I was a senior, and my wife has gone through medical hell with SSCD and Dandy Walker malformation for the last year. Not to mention the medical Bill's.
But, I know regardless of what this world throws at me, he showed his Love by sacrificing his son for my messes, along with yours.
He loves you man. Regardless of what it looks like, he loves you.
Travis Cooper sorry for what happened to u but i can’t feel the same way until he shows me that love
@@Haramglizzy it's no thing. Life is hard. Hang in there. I pray that God opens your eyes and makes you perceptive of his Love.
He has a plan for your life. If you want to see it, read the book of John.
Travis Cooper either he helps me or he kills me I’m pretty close to killing my self so If he still wants to abandon me he should go ahead but I hope he knows that I’m begging and crying even tho I get nothing back
"I tried my joy for my protection"
who doesn't?
kids in my class listing to music : happy song, the Friday song, cha cha slide, all the happy upbeat songs
Then there is me and like one friend from my old school : NF, nickle Back, my chemical romance, lil happy little sad, three day grace, skillet, ashes remain, and etc
I thought I was the only one....
Dude we should be friends I listen to all those artist and bands and it's really hard to find people who lile the same music
Wow u are so edgy and not like the other kids😐
@@bezeani8836 ya. But i still listen to other pop songs
@@kaysonbaker4229 cool. My snap is poncho_unicorn if u want to follow me
This hits really hard emotionally. I NEED music like this. People putting my feelings into words for me when I can’t. Makes me feel way less lonely in life. At least someone else feels the way I do/have
My thoughts exactly 😌😔
“ screamed and yelled, but i feel speechless .ask for help, you call it weakness “
Am I the only one who cries cuz this is how they feel about themselves not a soulmate friend ect . Why can’t I find myself ?
nop you aren't the only one
i feel you and i used to now i just survive another day of the same thing , except my cat she helps fill a emotional hole and emotional scars left by many betrayals and people
Ive struggled with loving myself my whole life because I was bullied in school and many of my teenage years were spent alone crying, ive had a gun to my head and was too much of a coward to pull the trigger but ive since realized that death is final and problems normally get fixed or go away with enough time... Hang in there
Grab my hand, I'm drowning
I feel my heart pounding
Why haven't you found me yet...
Legit was listening to his album like a week ago and somehow skipped this but Nate just singing is what I've been waiting for
I love that i finally found a rapper that I can actually relate to, I haven't found any rapper that i can relate to this much
Try listening to Sik World. He's amazing
This song makes me think of all the times people said they understood and would have my back but as soon as I had an issue they said it was to much to handle. They always leave
that just proves how strong u are, u Managed to fight even when no one was there, if they're not gonna be there at your worst they don't get to be there at your best, I hope you're doing okay, how are you?
For real
I understand this, because I struggle with this myself. Not as a person on your side, but on the opposite. I tend to avoid people I’ve become close to, in fear of making them leave me first. I’m trying to fix that, but as with all things, it’s a work in progress.
I assume people are treating you this way because they feel they are incapable of making any meaningful change in your life, and scared that if they attempt to do so, they will fail and all the blame will be put on them. People also don’t want to expend much energy without a clear payoff, and helping people is always a gamble. That’s in no way applicable to anyone, but that’s how I am.
That’s not your fault, of course. It takes a particularly strong person to follow through with that type of promise, knowing fully there’s no incentive other than wishing for you to get better. Most people aren’t strong.
Im not trying to make excuses or anything, because I understand that this type of behavior is, for lack of better terms, incredibly annoying to deal with, but that’s my thoughts on the matter.
My wife of 8 months left me in 2 weeks with no explanation or emotion. We were together for 7 years and everything seemed good. We had a lot plans for the future. The bottom is how I feel.
“Give me peace then you steal it”
“Grab my hand I’m drowning”
“ I wish you just love me back”
I cry every time 😢😢😢
I'm so sorry. You will heal eventually, trust me. You will heal and become stronger than before.
Dude, I'm so sorry you have to go through that. She doesn't deserve you. I hope you're doing okay.
@@hunterp41 thank you. I have been feeling better. I have my days.
@@coffeeismyaesthetic4306 I appreciated. I’ve been better. I Was really down for a while but I’m pushing forward.
Oh my gawd I'm so sorry....Hey but ur not alone my dad left me when I was a kid and gave my half brother up for adoption and now he has his own family.....which kills me......but ur not alone dude...And btw how old ru I am 14
I love the fan base he has its so strong, lyric videos are coming out faster than any other rappers fans come out with them
I am on a NF marathon right now, My girl just dumped me.She was the first girl I've truly cared about. It hurt when she broke up with me and I can barely handle day to day stuff anymore. She really did a number on me, I try to seem happy but I can barely do it. Its worse when I see her, I can't even look at her without tearing up. I wrote a song the other day about suicide because I can't handle it anymore.
I truly hope your pain eased at least a bit. I know how you feel
Hey, no girl's worth dying over. No matter what. You're life has got more to offer, the world has more to offer. You just gotta keep moving foreward.
you know that you connect to music when you can close your eyes and hear every single individual instrument playing along with the sweet tone of the voice. could fall asleep simply just connecting to a song.
People on this song comparing NF to Eminem. Eminem raps, NF does both. Stop comparing!!
wdym nf does both lmao? eminem still better doesnt matter who sings and who cant
@@RJ-sw2es no one said anyone is better. Sit down kid
Anh Nguyen siT dOwN kid shutcho ass up
Amauria Denmark EmiNem jUsT rAps. eminem created NF's entire career. eminem put his pain out in songs too. his mother kicked him out the house, his wife cheated, his dad left, he couldnt afford food for his kids. hes actually attempted to overdose and shoot himself. he talks about all of that. i know for a fact you aint never listen to eminem. u think hes just some fast rapping drug addicted washed up rapper. go take a listen at his older sad songs and you'd see just how much of nf is eminem.
Yeah mean... NF just amazing..
"Trade My Joy for my protection" hits me hard it reminds me of my mom and how i cant be happy around her cuz of all the yelling, trauma, pain and abuse... and "Traumas, they surround me I wish you'd just love me back" also hits hard just wanting to feel love and the fact that I cant see that my life was bad a few years ago.
My traumas are so messed up. I got bullied for showing emotions like fear and sadness. And I got sexually harassed two times. So my traumas are like this: I can't cry in front of other people, because every time I cry, the tears feel like fire on my skin.They burn my skin and hurt me with that. I try to not cry, but with that it gets harder to breath. My heart beats so fast that it hurts. I feel fear every time someone sees me cry, fear of being laughed at again. Fear of being called bad nicknames again, like crybaby. Fear of people pushing me against walls and making me cry, just so they have something to laugh at. I am scared that when people see me cry that they feel happy and try to make me scared or sad on purpose again. And that is where my second trauma comes from, too. People can't touch me at some places. Like my shoulders, belly, neck, throat, legs or even arms sometimes. People can't hug me for too long or too tight, because I get massive panic attacks. If I am so much scared I can't help but cry, but this makes me everything worse. I just can't breath in that moment, which makes me even more scared. It hurts like hell to live with both.
But the thing I hate most is how the people who I love need to treat me different. I hate how my friends and family can't hug me too long or give me comfort when I cry. I hate to know that they feel bad, because they can'T help me. Words can't help me and they can't hug me and tell me everything is going to be better, because if they hug me or see me cry, they make everything worse.
Then take the fight to the dispair, do not let it control you anymore. You need to find a point where you refuse to take the abuse from your own thoughts. You cannot control everyone elses bullshit, but you can control yours through lots of effort. But, that effort is worth it. Imagine bouncing off a negative thought like deflecting a punch or a bullet bouncing of wonder woman's shield. Find strength. Find peace. But, most importantly, find yourself, so that you can save her. Because only you can do that. Do it, not for anyone else but yourself because you deserve better than what this world gives you. Now take it.
You're a survivor... you're still here and you're strong. Remember to tell yourself that.
@@ibbytaz9465 thank you, this means a lot to me
@@user-bt8kj7ms1p I'm glad I could make you feel a little better
When you will be old
you would be smiling reading this comment ;)
I can finally listen to a song that tells me people go through the same thing as I do, Thank you NF.
Once again NF hits it out of the park.
My interpretation of this song is about trying to love and accept yourself - probably the hardest thing to do.
I’m struggling with that myself , it’s hard living when you want to die but you’re afraid to
Thank you for posting this! This is literally the exact song I needed for writing!
U write? I do aswell, can I ask what u write? :3
Lol I'm litterally writing with this too!
"Why haven't you found me yet? I hold you so proudly." That lyric has a special meaning to me. My neighbor who basically raised me moved away for college 7 years ago. She said she would come back for me. She hasn't come back yet. I miss her a lot. I talk about her all the time. I don't know if she even remembers I exist. I still love her and want for her to come back for me. Calypso, if you ever see this, please find me. It's not that hard. I haven't moved far. Please. I need you now more than ever because the traumas really are surrounding me. I'm drowning and I might not make it. Please come help me.
people serve their purpose for us. We cannot control the length and it always hurts when they leave, but now you have a choice. You either stay in the lighthouse and hope the ship comes home, or you can press on and if the ship returns one day then embrace it with open arms. Do not forget the good she did, but do not use it as your only means of escape from the traumas. You cannot give in. You are strong and you will swim. You will swim so far.
@@BorderingHope Thank you for your encouragement 💙
My friends: jamming out to WAP, Savage, Pov, Daisy Or mostly tiktok songs
Me in the corner just simply listening to NF
this
okay even tho you posted this 6 months ago.....I can relate to youuu
OMG ur soooooooooo unique. Stunning and brave.
Me listening to nf, Keshi and country songs
its the more simple days isnt it? im drinking monster ultra, watching tommys new vlog, listening to nf.
this is so relatable, i'm actually crying 😔
Alternative version
m.ua-cam.com/video/xlme1zf7Y3Q/v-deo.html
I have severe ptsd from lots of trauma… this song just explains perfectly how I feel inside and so I used this video/song to explain how I’ve been feeling and trying to properly express my emotions
Ditto, try to stay strong and know that you are not alone in how you are feeling. Just look at the rest of the comments here. cPTSD is crippling.
If NF would have a concert i would suport everything for him i love his music so much it touches me every damn time every song he writes i feel like someone understands me that i am not totally alone
Its a conversation I have with myself everyday. It's the war within myself after all the abuse and trauma I've gone through it's just hard not to melt when he speaking the words I say everyday.
I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my UA-cam channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. 💙❤
A.S. Minor subbed ... huge advocate for mental health awareness myself as someone who’s been diagnosed with various mental illnesses ... keep doing what you do, with love ❤️
@@LYRIXXXofficial thank you so much for your kind words and support! Keep spreading the good word! 💚💚
people like you should exist more nowadays that we need them. keep doing what youre doing, wish you the best in everything. may god bless your beautiful heart ❤️
@@neffy.764 thank you so much! 💚💚
I feel empty most of the time. This song didn't make me cry, but I can relate more than words can say.
🖤
"Grab my hand I'm drowning, I feel my heart pounding, why haven't you found me yet? I hold you so proudly, traumas they surround me, I wish you'd just love me back.."
That really hits me because i broke up with my boy about 3 months ago and one day really recently i texted him saying 'missing you..' and he replied with 'what should i say? its cute that you still miss me but..' then i put 'i know i should move on..' then he hit me with 'its not that.. its cute you miss me but i've moved on to someone else.. you need to find your someone, you might think you need me but i am not the one you need.. you'll find him soon'. i burst out into tears because i know its hard to love someone that doesnt like you an doesn't wanna be your friend.. 20 minutes later i texted him saying 'i hope she keeps you safe and happy' and he replied with 'thank you for not being rude about this..' and i said 'well i still have alot of feelings for you and i dont think im ever gonna give them up.. and i dont wanna ever put pressure on you..'. he replied with 'you never will and never have put pressure on me. thank you for being there'. he didn't realise how much he had *_broke_* me..
edit: I'm a mess now.. I feel horrible and i have too many regrets in life.. I kinda wish i didn't just agree when he said he that it wasn't working out, i wish i had been kinder and tried to act happier. maybe he wouldn't of left me.. I am worthless now, many of Nathan's songs hits me to hard that i just cry. i am now obsessed with NF and his music, he is one of the only reasons i am alive.
You're strong! You'll get though this! Take my hand, I'll help guide you.
@@randomuser935 How..? I don't even know you and to be honest I'm pretty weak myself.. Physically and mentally..
@@zrbotix Just because we don't know you doesn't mean we can't help you too. I love to help people so I'd be glad to help you too. And I can feel the pain you feel too but with someone who was much closer to me. My dad.. he just isn't the man I remember before I was 10. I mean sure he was abusive but I stilled loved him. Now I've just been having hard times with life myself. But I find comfort in friends like you should. Find someone who is close to you and talk to them about it. And don't worry you'll find your special someone. I just know it. They may be sitting in front of you and you don't know. Just be patient and that one person who is meant for you will come to you eventually. I'm only a 12 but I am already looking for my special someone cause I can't wait to fall into the person's arms and be theres forever ^^
Don't lose faith yet girl. I got your back
@@coco1113 Thanks I guess, I'm pretty young too.. I'm 11. I have had an interest in relationships ever since i was 8, but I never had realised that they could hurt so badly. But.. Thank you so much for sharing this, and thank you for uh well... 'being there' but you know... I don't feel as bad as I used to.. I still feel that emptiness and I miss him and everything but still... I am a bit better... The thing that hurts the most at the moment is these two facts: He doesn't wanna talk and I don't think he ever will want to talk, as he has lost interest in me and he never seems sad or even aware that he hurt me. And also that he has moved on and will never fit perfectly in my arms because we weren't the right pair. But thank you, I don't know how many times I'm gonna say this but thank you...
😪This Broke me
As someone with ptsd this is so real it helps me feel so much more heard and if anyone her is going though anything bad her is a quote that is the only reason I am alive “taking you life is not freedom it is taking that pain and suffering from you and putting it on everyone that would have tried so hard to help you and then it never stops”
This describes the relationship between me and my whole family
I feel you brother , I hate my parents but I love them at the same time it’s hard loving them and hating them .
Me too... Im here to talk if u need
@@romo009able same
A year ago, my bestfriend got really drunk. He was being super cheerful, until he texted me, asking me not to leave him. His simple text made me feel so loved and cared, i stopped trying to end my life. The pain is still there, but at least, i have a reason to stay.
I listened to this non stop when my ex cheated on me - I was heartbroken at how he was treating me.
It’s refreshing listening to it and I haven’t spoke to him in months.
I’m a lot happier now.
Glad ur happy
This song is literally everything I feel but don’t know how to explain. I’ve never had a song describe the way I feel so perfectly. Thank you, NF. Thank you for finding the words I couldn’t.
I love how his songs are so relatable and beautiful 💕❤❤ he's the I love him so much😍
The worst pain, in this entire world, is seeing how many of us, are being effected by this sinister thing call, "Depression". The sickest part is, that it may result in death.. Stay strong, okay love? Not for anyone, but you! Whoever is reading this, you matter to me. Stay with us! 🤗😚❤
It's funny how the cloud is happy... While i stay here all numb...
Hey you.
Yeah, you!
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
Stop scrolling.
Listen to me please.
We are completely strangers.
But please, smile for me.
Aww...Look, that smile looks so good on you.
Please always keep that smile.
I know if your going through a hard time...
But life isn't bad, it's just some moments in life are bad.
Never give up.
To see the good days pass through bad days.
And one day you'll be proud of yourself you didn't give up and continued to see the rainbow fighting in the storm.
You matter to me💜.
You are beautiful.
And my prayers always stick with you no matter who you are.
(not my words but need to be shared)
I wasn't even smiling during this since I cant smile anymore bc of my sadness but thank you so much!
I cried thank you
my heart hurts so damn much.
THE WHOLE SONG HIT ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS
same yo 😔🤝.
I want to thank a friend of mine for showing me this song and thank NF for releasing this wonderfully emotional song. This is my new favorite song since Why Would You Leave Us. It's sad, wonderful, powerful, thought-inducing, etc. By far my favorite on the album.
Today's my Birthday and I'm here crying, I just can't feel happiness anymore. Ik I'm happy some days but it all ends up in me being in my room over thinking everything.
even just the start of this song spikes anxiety and hurts me because of the memories i have associated with it😔
Who else is listening to this while crying in bed?
:)
too many
Always.
Me.
🤡✋🏼
Anyone else wanna cry but for some reason can’t and just want the empty space inside of them filled but it can only be filled by 1 person,
And that one person just left and you felt like nothing
Yes.
@@ariahmccurry2089 hii army,
@@sunshinehobi1854 hello! how are you doing today?
@@ariahmccurry2089 not so good what about you
@@sunshinehobi1854 I could be better. I hope you feel better. Do you mind telling me what is bothering you?
4 months ago I was diagnosed with depression and I haven't cried for about a year but this song triggered something that made want to cry. Even though I didn't shed tears, it shows that I can still be able to cry someday.
Why do I always find good songs @ 6AM?
we all do
Same here, strange huh
This song hit me really hard. Just the music alone is just a powerful message and combined with the lyrics it just hits the heart. I love nf so much like all of his songs really help me connect to my real problems and real people. Were all dealing with our own problems and his songs help me personally get through some of my problems especially with my relationships in the past. Sometimes I just stare at the ceiling and listen to his songs. They make me feel more powerful and I feel like their just telling their own stories that I relate to and just listening to them helps me get through tough days. Never stop nf...
Anyone ever feel like just crying so hard but you’ve been crying so much that there aren’t any tears left so you just sit in silence listening and feeling numb.
When the song knows your feelings more then your own friends
NF’s songs are always so relatable.
I can relate to this song so much, especially about my family and friends,
I have borderline personality disorder, and so it is really hard when the people who say they care about you don’t do anything to help, but because they may be “the favorite person” it completely destroys you when they don’t
reciprocate like you want them to...
it hurts like absolute hell
For me this song represents the fights my mentality have, the way I bounce back and forth between loving myself and hating myself.
This song makes me feel like my soul is leaking tears..
I find it hard to hate, or not to forgive,until some people just don't deserve another chance, love you and your music NF
when someone asks me: "how are you?"
i always reply with: "im fine"
but in reality: confused, broken, betrayed, never good enough, anxious, fragile, im falling apart but you dont notice it, annoying, defeated, pathetic, rejected, lonely
We’re all in this place. Most just hide it well. I’m sorry you are not alone is all I’m saying
i always just say "i'm ok i mean look at the sky it's sunny" but i say this while i'm crying (my mom made me go to therapy because i cry when i lie)
yeah, because if you say you're not they either don't understand, don't know how to react or they hurt you.
trauma, its so fascinating, keeps me in pain but makes me give up on finding a way out at the same time