Shan BOODY You've obviously come to a point in your life that you know men cannot be faithful and have decided to go this OR route. You know they will end up going somewhere else why not just give it a label!
💛❤💛❤Listen up! The moment your partner tells you that they will leave you if SOMEONE BETTER COMES ALONG,,is the moment you SHOULD GET THE HELL OUTTA THAT RELATIONSHIP! It's OVER....... this is from personal past experience.... believe me it's done when you or him express that!💛❤💛❤
I've actually been talking with my boyfriend about open relationships (the concept, if we'd be comfortable with it, what it means, etc.) largely because watching your videos has really piqued some curiosities and questions in my psyche of how and why this works for some people. My bf and I basically concluded that it wasn't for us, although we both of us agreed that we'd talk about/consider it if either of us was more seriously curious down the line. I will say that even being able to honestly talk about it and knowing that its a not off-limits conversation is an incredible feeling. What started as a talk about being "open" ended in us understanding more about what we look for in intimacy and what drives attraction and jealousy for us. Thanks Shan! keep doing what you do
+nehab These are my fav kinds of comments!! Ones that are reflective, respectful and come with a story lol (guys I loooooove your stories) moving this to the top oxo
All your open relationship videos make me want more and more to try this kind of relationship ! You guys seem so happy and the trust and respect you both have for eachother is very inspirational !! Keep up the awesome content shannon ! Love you ❤️
"i would not want the third person to feel like the third person" damn that's hella considerate. there are so many couples who honestly dgaf about bi people as people and just want them to be a convenient add-on to their threesomes. thanks for being cool, i guess is what i'm saying? haha.
She said it because of her fear of being that third person herself when they do a threesome. I'd bet you anything that's what she thought of before she turned it around and said it.
I like that I'm living in a world where couples get to self-define what their relationship looks and feels like. Ain't nobody's business what you choose to do with your happy little selves. Rock on!! ❤️👏🙌
A lot of people who don't like open relationships, sure do watch a lot of videos (and comment) about open relationships 😂 if it's not for you, that's fine....but keep it pushing. We don't go around bashing the "traditional/monogamous" relationship structure because to each their own. Let these two beautiful people enjoy their beautiful life, while you go build your own. Whatever that means to you. ❤️✌🏼
If an open relationship is not for you that's fine but why be borderline disrespectful to Shannon and Jared's relationship. CLEARLY their relationship works for them. 🤷🏽♀️
Look, i'm old school...If you have to see other people while in a relationship with me then we're not in a relationship. That's a friends with benefit ordeal.
RedNiNo Fioz I agree because she said at first she gets jealous if he's with someone..if you're gonna be jealous then you shouldn't be in an open relationship..if I have a man I want him to be my one and only and I'm his one and only.
RedNiNo Fioz Interesting that "relationship" is defined in multiple ways by countless "couples" on this planet. Can't say that I've heard any one consistent definition. The words monogamous, open, polymory precede the word "relationship" in the lives of countless couples. That word is pretty much self defined so hey, just do you.
They were friends with benefits previously. Then they got to a point where sex was no longer the only benefit, and now they're sharing their entire lives together. That's definitely way more serious than friends with benefits.
I can never be in an open relationship. Power to those who can. It's emotionally and mentally draining. However, I'm old school when it comes to marriage. I've been married for 19 years and am still in love.
My husband and i have been together 19 years been poly off and on. We opened the marriage officially a year ago and are still VERY MUCHO in love still. I feel that love and bond helps make this work
I was a virgin when I got married at 24 ---inexperienced in sex and romance. I married my best friend. We had known each other since we were 15. Less than a year into being married he suggested an open relationship. I was in an instant shocked , confused and heartbroken but agreed to experiment with the notion --partly because we were intellectuals and I thought I could intellectualize that monogamy was a cerebral construct and that humans could potentially love more than one person at a time. We didn't get very far in that experiment--- I became wildly jealous and extremely anxious ( mind you this was 20 years ago before it was a trend ). The thought of him giving his affection to another woman , a stranger, just floored me and made me paranoid. Its something I would say that you don't want go into blindly. But maybe that is because I personally connect sex & love . Polyamory basically injured my psyche and my ability trust men for many years but worse it injured my connection with him and ultimately contributed to the unraveling of the marriage. I've never really been the same since. Im still highly anxious about the thought of a partner leaving me for someone else and I find it very hard to go with the flow in the beginning phase of new relationships. Which ultimately sabotages the connection. The idea of dating multiple people casually and without commitment also throws me off balance. In short, that little polyamory experiment for me broke a spiritual covenant which basically messed with my mind and heart in a very bad way for a very long time. Only now am I finally getting counseling to try and show up more confidently in romantic relationships. Maybe I was too old fashion for that experiment -- or there was bot enough communication. But I know what I like and appreciate and that is a Man who chooses to be faithful and monogamous. It makes me feel safe and protected in life and a partnership. Im amazed how the young women of today don't seem bothered. I actually wish I could be that open and relaxed. I feel that partnership should never be a jail or prison on another human beings desires. But Im not when it comes to love. I prefer learning depths of one person to breadth of experience with many. Good luck to everyone out there. The times we are in today are not for the faint of heart. 🙄
Hey all! Thanks for continuing this conversation with us. Be sure to click the "i" in the righthand corner to take the poll so I can learn more about you!
Shan BOODY From a quick browse through the comment section, you NEED to keep making open relationship videos. It seems like people are having a hard time grasping that it's a mutual agreement between partners that includes boundaries and, especially compared to traditional couples, is based on 100% trust. I've never been in an open relationship myself (closest I've experienced would be a casual dating relationship where we both knew that our current lives/goals weren't going to match up, but we prioritized each other over anyone else while having the freedom to seek someone who would fit) but I totally get it. I feel like more couples would be better off if they considered an open relationship instead of the black and white ultimatum of monogamy or breakup.
For the Open Relationships and You question, I couldn't find an answer that matched but I've been in an open relationship and now I'm in a monogamous relationship. And I still absolutely adore the guy I was in an open relationship with, we still talk, and it was one of the healthiest relationships I've ever had! Awesome video.
Fuck naw I need honesty but in a monogamous relationship. I don't want to have an open raltionship only to feel like there will be honesty if I take that route. I just want a fucking loyal ass dude that can be honest. If he isnt feeling me then leave, dont string me around while your ass is developing crushes on everyone else ..... smh
From this video, I get the impression that Shannon would be ready to give up the open relationship if Jared was ready to commit to just her. But from his answers, that is never going to happen
Olivia M i agree with you so much in the videos shes made before she was with him she never mentioned open relationships at all and now all of a sudden shes so down for it. Im 90% sure this was all his idea and it was either she had to agree to it or he'd leave her.
Pointless Name - A lot of the things that she's saying point to their opposing views on the matter. A lot of what Shannon says does suggest that she's more open to a monogamous commitment eventually, whereas a lot of what Jarred says suggests that he can't imagine being open to committing to her only.
They simply use the term "open relationship" and it triggers you and makes you uncomfortable based on your own perception of what that means. However, if you listen, the principle of what they're doing is simply being completely honest and open in a relationship with no boundaries; no matter what you're being honest about. We often hold back on being honest with our partners and honest with ourselves based on what we think should be allowed in a relationship, when in fact, our growth process as human beings is anything but linear. Relationships are not about ego and possession and rather about growth, and that growth process looks different for everyone. You hear the term "open relationship" and try to diminish it to sex with other people and having a lack of self control, when in fact what they are speaking about is the essence of unconditional love and trying to build a healthy relationship through practicing what they do in an attempt to break down an old destructive relationship paradigm. This is simply how they're choosing to try to do that right now, and it may or may not change as they grow and evolve more as with all things in life.
Open relationships is about sex with others. If it was based on unconditional love, why don't they try polyamory? Share your love with anyone, but they reduce the relationship to only being open with sex.
River Tuccaro And yet you spent 17+ minutes watching a video dedicated to open relationships, don't disrespect somebody's relationship just because you don't understand it or it wouldn't work for you
They might be weird for you but they are not weird for everybody. I'm sure there are lots of things that you do that other people think are weird. You can't live your life worrying about what other people think.
Thank you for continuing to do videos like these no matter how shitty your comment section gets. I really do take something from all your videos like I know many others do!
I'm not made for an Open relation, I'm not gonna comment on yours. The best part (for me) is the question (and Shannon 's answer) 'Would you leave me for someone else'? I think your answer should fit everybody . Good answer 👍🏽
It takes a lot of time and patience with yourself. And in the meantime, just find something that you feel your confident in doing and do it. I hope you can build your self-esteem up enough to one day not be upset about not getting the girl/guy attention that you want for instance. You deserve to feel special because you are and hopefully when the time is right someone can show you just that.
I don't get the point of an open relationship. Is it solely based on having sex with other people and not having to label it as cheating? I don't get it... someone help me... lol P.S you should do a pro's and con's of open relationships video...
+The Movement pro it works for us. Con having to over explain why it works for us. Pro over explaining why it works for us bc it drives views. Con answering the same questions despite having over explained this throughout the three videos (and counting) on it
Shan BOODY I find your videos very interesting and informative.I think this is a good way for individuals in open relationship or monogamous relationships to communicate and stay informed good vid as always keep your heads up positive vibes all day 👽✌
I think the reason why open relationships work for some people is because, they themselves have a lot to offer and want to have multiple relationships meaning its not only about sex they want to experience intimacy with other people. At least that how i take it since 3 of my close friends are in long term open relationships themselves and thats what they have told me. Or some people just want plain sex, everyones different.
How many of you just have ONE friend?? Ok. You genuinely love all of them, right? Ok. It takes effort and consideration to maintain these friendships, yes? Ok. It's really honestly truly not that difficult of a concept to understand. If it's not for you, it's not for you. Some people don't like green peppers. Don't eat them. Don't shame people who do. It's not that big of a deal. Spending time trying to convince people who don't like green peppers that their lives will change for the better once they finally get with the program.....sounds ridiculous right? Yeah that's kind of how at least half of y'all sound. Its getting old. The whole point of the relationship styles that you all prefer is create happiness, yes? Ok. They are happy. Same destination. Different journey. People get so distracted from the point of everything. You are supported, Shannon.❤️
Assuming that you aren't sleeping with them, your friends can't give you STD's or have you unknowingly raising a child that isn't biologically yours. That's why we've evolved to have the emotion of jealously. To protect us from the cons of sleeping around. It's no different than why the emotion of fear exists. The problem I see with this discussion is that a lot of folks act as if there aren't tangible risks to promiscuous behavior.
I'm immature. I feed my jealousy. Cookies, milk, chicken...pretty much whatever it needs to flourish in my life. Lol Seriously tho, this conversation gets more and more interesting to hear (maybe because I'm simply so opposite you two). The parts of you guys that you are capable of "shutting off", for lack of better words, are so very vivid and dominant in myself. Like, Shan...I would've elbowed the girl at the show! 👊👊 Lol You guys are great. Interesting perspectives.
Shan BOODY Girl yes! I'm horrible. Lol But its one of the key reasons why I've been a fan of your content for some years now. Your channel has helped me to understand or at least gain a different perspective from nearly anything that enters my mind. I'm Bahamian and we're pretty closed minded so this content is great for me. Keep up the good work Queen. 🙏
I know a lot of people are shooketh by this type of relationship. I used to be too, but since learning about yours... I respect it. There's a real genuineness and romance that comes along with continuously choosing your partner while having the freedom to choose someone else. You never have to wonder about if this person loves you still. A lot of people stay together out of fear or obligation and become resentful because of it. Gwan gyal. Dweet.
The hate and, in most cases, misunderstanding toward open relationships is wild to me. I've been in an open relationship for 5 years and the idea that I love my partner less or that he doesn't love me because we're sexually or emotionally involved with other people is crazy to me. At the end of the day, your relationship is whatever you and your partner want it to be. If it's monogamous, cool, if it's polyamorous, cool--if you're asexual, even, great. Just do what makes you happy so long as it doesn't impede the well-being of others~
it's easier based on Jared's experience of being in a monogamous relationship vs being in our relationship. He was speaking for self, which is what I wanted to emphasize, it's not a universal fact by any means
God I love videos with you and Jared! I love the honesty, I love how deep these questions can get, I don't personally agree with open relationships but I'm glad you two are able to make it work, by setting boundaries and rules. I admire that. xo
I saw your face drop when he said yes to open marriage... I mean I understand the purpose of an open relationship, hell - i'm in one too. I think it allows for exploration most importantly but in marriage. I personally would have to disagree with it being open. That is my husband, for me and no-one else. Especially when kids start being brought into the equation. I feel when jared said the closing of the open relationship leads to shadiness is something he needs to deal with (overtime). You can still communicate with your partner just as openly if not more so in a "closed" relationship.
+CoolKidOx there is nothing in this video that I was hearing for the first time ever so I was never surprised at the answer. This is actually the second time we filmed this video with the same questions as the first time the audio was bad (hence why I was paranoid about it this time). And i did validate that some people are able to achieve the level of honest and open communication that jared and I have in a closed relationship
+Shan BOODY You are currently in an open relationship which is different from an open marriage I believe. Since you advocate one, you don't necessarily need to be sure/ or advocate the other. Can I get your stance on the prospect of being in an open marriage? What if he changed his mind & suddenly didn't want it open?
+Daisy Santos we don't use terms like "allow." He's not my parent and vice versa. If he chose to do that I'd have questions but I don't tell him what he's able to do
I'll never understand how someone could be in a open relationship or in an open marriage especially. No disrespect to people in that type of relationship at all. I just wouldn't be able to do it.
So is an open relationship essentially a polyamorous relationship? I have a hard time understanding this concept of an "open relationship" like basically you both are a couple, but still have the freedom to go out with other people.. what if you meet someone you really click with & spend more time with them & decide you'd like the same kind of relationship with them.. is this like an open relationship with multiple people? I'm very confused
Shan I have a question, a scenario.. to better understand you guys' relationship. Y'all touched on it briefly, but I'm still a bit curious. What if one of you meets someone you're interested in and wants to seriously pursue that person? The interest is deeper than a few dates, deeper than sexual relations, you really want to get to know that person.... do you guys' allow each other to keep seeing that person, talking to that person knowing that it could possibly lead to feelings being involved or would you give the other person an ultimatum and have to choose who they want to continue with? I apologize if my wording isn't the best. I hope you got the gist of my question..
Damn I actually had faith in this relationship till this video seems like Shan secretly wants something from Jared eventually that he is not going to give her Like he's kinda going along with with this till he takes off in his career Let me restate my opinion especially cause im never the one to comment. I listens, respect others views and keep it moving But Shannon run .. He doesn't realize or maybe ya dont realize it's un equally yoked he's complacent your Hoping it will change .. most of ya thumbnail it SEEMS TO ME your chasing still, even through a picture Shannon I have watched your past videos.. I understand what you've been through first hand ..dont fall for it u give too much Shannon he yes your right to support his music but I know you feel uneasiness and Yo..he SHOULD B LUCKKYYY TO HAVE EVEN TAKIN UP THIS MUCH OF YOUR TIME!
She seems so much more into him than he is into her. He mentions he actually wants her to leave him, where as she’s scared to lose him. And when he says he’s scared to lose her, I felt it wasn’t sincere. Love is blind I guess.. but who knows? Maybe my red flags are some else’s happiness that I do not understanding.
Anything open ended is very unsettling to me because we are human and we are naturally wired to be curious about or to desire the next best thing. (Case and point the iphone lol jk😜)There will always be someone smarter, prettier, and richer because no one has it all. There will always be someone with more intrigue. Especially in the case of long-term relationship because after 15 or 20 years you pretty much know everything that there is to know about your partner so naturally there is curiosity when a new person comes around. I wouldn't feel comfortable telling my partner that I wouldn't be heartbroken if they toss me to the side when the next best thing comes along. There has to be some loyalty and accountability in a partnership in my humble opinion. But with all that being said if two people agree that being open works for them, from day one, then GREAT! As long as no one gets hurt sound righteous to me.
I know I could not be in an open relationship but I don't judge others who are. It is THEIR life! We are so conditioned to one way to have a relationship when that just isn't the case. The ways in which people choose to express their sexuality and parts of themaelvesl, as long as consensual and legal, is up to them. Everyone in the comments bashing it should maybe try to learn more about it and not feed into the hegemony of what defines a relationship✨
I love watching you Shannon but just guard your heart, because if he falls in love and wants to marry someone else that shit will hurt you no matter how much you may disagree!!
I personally don't agree with open relationships. Yes you can be attracted to other people while being in a relationship but to me that's really messy. But not only that, I would feel bad for the other people involved. Even if you're upfront about it with other people they may not realize what they're getting into and catch feelings. I just feel like someone ends up hurt in the end. I think it only benefits people who are scared of commitment or who have been so hurt in the past that this makes them feel like "it's okay if they see other people because I'm ALLOWING it this time". I'm not gonna judge people who are in it and if it works for other people cool I just don't see the point.
ssnmemak yes she’s only doing it for him he loves being able to do what he wants and not get in trouble for it ! Plus he keeps saying only a little jealous and he’s only saying that because she’s saying she’s jealous, if that makes sense lol
I'm in a good ol fashion controlled relationship lol I got all kind of rules and so does he .. yet oddly enough for 3 years now it's been amazing. We are very honest with each other and developed a bestfriend relationship to where we can be out in public and both agree our waiter has a fat ass, or he would say "I see you would go for that buff nigga over there" lmaoo😹😹 only difference is we don't act on it . I find all your videos on open relationships VERY interesting to the point I made him sit down and watch this one with me . We both felt like we too crazy for this open relationship but both felt a respect for yal relationship bc we understand what works for you works for you therefore nobody really can judge yal or us ❤️
I did not want this to end. I really love the vulnerability of this beautiful relationship. I am currently single. I think this is a great way to have a relationship and I do think Shannon is right about it being for some couples and not for others. I love that you both want the best for each other. I honestly don't know how my next relationship is going to work or with who or when lol. In terms of dating, can you give examples. Like obviously you guys are not looking for other people but is it just like "oh I met this cool ass person last night and I want to take him or her out." ?? Are either of you guys dating other people now? And what does that look like? I need more videos like this! I have so many other questions. I really appreciate you guys sharing this part of you with us.
Although I don't understand wanting an open relationship, I'm appalled by the condescension coming from people in these comments, acting like you can't be happy because you're in an open relationship. Just because I don't understand it doesn't mean I'm going to assume MY way is the only way. I'm sorry people are acting so ignorant Shan :/
Though an open relationship doesn’t work for myself and my fiancé. The views you two have about being jealous, not worrying about things you can’t control, openness of communication, and not hiding things are very integral for a long lasting relationship. Also, clearly defining boundaries is so important to.
My wife and I tried an open relationship, were we both were dating the same guy. It was great in the beginning but ended horribly (bcuz of the guy) and bcuz of that we no longer will have an open marriage.
I'm in an Open relationship. The role that Jealous plays in my life is self reflectance. As my ability to identify jealous and the reason why I am jealous grows, the journey it has taken me is through the path of self affirmation and inner reflection of Why am I jealous, is it because of insecurity (Often times it is) Is it the fear of Missing out ( Some of the times it is) raising questions like "Am I good enough? Does that last question even matter? what does being in a relationship even mean?". Open relationships come with lots of turmoil but can bring about the biggest freedom, and with that freedom can come with the deepest of Love because everyday we choose to come home to each other, default to watch tv on the couch together, and to eat dinner together and to keep each other's feelings of insecurity, or FOMO at ease, and to allow each other to enjoy things in life that may or may not involve the other - which includes exploring new love interests (Compersion).
According to whose laws? Every religion on earth has sanctified multi-marriages, often within constraints that work for the people involved in the marriage. A room with an open door is still a room.
Open relationship = I am just dating and you are my fav to date ..... I am judging, but not judging 😂😂😂.... I read in the Harvard review that multitasking never works on any level. You think you are doing more , but the quality of whatever you doing is greatly reduced. you are not a couple. You are just very good friends that hang out and have sex. She is basically what my uncle would call his bottom bitch . Harsh I know, but what I do know when people do this there is always a point where someone wants more. As you age, you want stability and guarantees. I really feel a lot of women trick themselves into wanting this because they know the man they are with are not ready. Def not say this is you Shan... but I have gf who say he's going to cheat anyway so this is easier because at least I know.But y'all are young live it up. I def wasn't angel, but as you age you see the world, love, and relationships differently. Tread lightly. Best of luck
You have no idea how helpful and informative this was for me and how amazingly inspiring you and Jared have been to the discovery of my own preference of relationship style because of all of your videos and how open and candid you two have been. I truly thank you both. Sharing this with everyone I know!!
I think having an open marriage is messed up simply because if you can sleep with someone else you have not been able to receive what you need from the relationship. Call it what you want but if you have someone you want to be with having another woman or man share their genitals with them other than you their partner is just messed up!!
Chill lmao. If it's not for you it's not for you. But I think it takes courage to talk about their open relationship so maybe don't shit all over their truth?
i like big women, i like small women, i like medium size women. i like tall women, i like short women, i like inbetween height women. i like a variety of different shapes and sizes of women as well as different ethnicities. 1 woman cannot be all these at once.
this is a very important self reflection. A friend of mine recently found out her partner that she lives with is a serial cheater. When caught he pointed out to her how she doesn't fulfill his needs but I pointed out to her when dealing with someone who needs the attention of MANY people at one time no one person can clearly be all things and it's unfair to say that
Open relationships are literally "I wanna cheat but I don't want to get in trouble for it" 🙄 .... Shannon I know this isn't my place to say but you deserve so much better. A man that knows what and WHO he wants.
I feel like he said/implied "I don't want to feel trapped" instead of just owning up to saying this is the woman I wanna be with, but on the flip side I guess it's healthy to be in a space where you feel open
stupid bitches, at least they are honest, u guys fell for christianity programming about slut shaming its perfectly normal for a girl to want to cheat after 3 years! we are not meant for 1 partner
Do you realize that if she was so unhappy in this relationship that she wouldn't have stayed for 2 years? You're acting like he held a gun to her head and forced his beliefs on her.. If she wanted to leave she would have.. There are 7 billion people in the world they aren't the only ones doing this that life is for some people and it isn't for others
Ok shannon, I really like your hard work and what you represent. A strong black woman. But we all see your face when your man talk about open mariage... what ? What about your couple when your children gonna ask you why daddy flirt sometimes with other woman ? I think this type of relationship is good in your present. But in the futur , pregnant or with children. Do you think is very healthy ?
jamztam lol! Your strawmen are quite pathetic... What makes you think it would be harmful or confusing to potential children to have multiple parents in an extended family to confide in and find comfort when they need confirmation, have questions or get a broken heart? How would it be more confusing than for example living next door to or in the same appartment building as a number of aunts and uncles? Kids are not stupid or simple.
Wow i know I'm probably late but he looks exactly like Justin Bieber but slightly better looking. The conversation that is being had is amazing though I've never known anyone with an open relationship
I have been observing the way Shannon non-verbally communicates with those whom she features on her videos, I love watching her because simply she's sincere, she wholeheartedly means everything she says. With Jared, she's calm and centered, proud and content with what she's got (with him). Her voice tone is calm and loving, she keeps her eyes fixed on his and doesn't shy away from what's being discussed. She genuinely smiles, giggles and laughs and it makes me (at least) happy. She loves what she is doing. I love, love seeing her happy.
I appreciate your experience and you sharing your relationship with youtube, in an open and honest way. I do not agree with the open relationship phenomenon, not because I am not an open person it's just not right for me personally. I think especially when children come into a relationship/marriage, I personally do not think having other people involved in that union is something is okay for me, that is too complicated for me to even accept, especially involving health. But it is an interesting social experience hearing other peoples opinions, if it works for you that's great, I would be interested in hearing from people that do this long term and the effects it has on them.
"i wanna see you adored the way I see you." HUUUNNNNYYY. Some girl Twerking on him isnt her adoring him. I do not agree w open relationships. Ima get what I Deserve and thats soneone who knows my worth. Tf. Lol
I feel jealous when something great happens for my friends, even though it is something that I particularly have no interest in. I still root for them, but part of me feels like a failure in that sense! I know i'm not the only one that happens to, so I just let it pass. I'm working on my first instinct not being "what about me?!"
Video ideas: 1. More collaborations. 2. What does marriage look like in 2017? Does marriage even make sense anymore? 3. Group makeout (mmf or mmmf). Yes...a kissing video with more than one man. Pick 2 or 3 guys with different kissing/intimacy styles and guys who you have made out with before or who you have always been curious about.. and do a demonstration to show who is the strongest, most talented kisser & caresser. Show what style is best for you. We don't get to see you indulge enough. 4. Product unboxings. 5. Rate the various dating websites and apps. Conduct a survey to see what apps or websites people are using and how they rate the options out there. 6. Survey of women's fantasies and adult vid categories + suggestions on fem/women-centric p*rn. What are you all into? Novel based stuff? Is a storyline always required...since women are far less visual and more emotionally invested? Or are many of you as kinky and freaky as men? Have women tell their fantasies... either through an interview style...or acted out & narrated. And yes Shannon... you too. Tell us at least one of your fantasies. It doesn't have to be the one from the Hannah video... you seemed scared about that one... but at least try telling another.
I think an open relationship is a relationship involving two cheaters who want to be together while cheating on each other and knowing about it.......I hope this "open relationship" ends soon
אַל תַּעֲשׂוּ עֵין הָרַע It means in Hebrew don't do evil eye yourself. Don't talk about yourselves so much as this will destroy you, Love you from Israel
All of the people that are shitting on open relationships because they: A. Commented before they watched any of the videos B. Don't take into consideration that maybe different types of people might actually function better in a different type of relationship than them. C. Don't make an effort to really grasp the explanations that she gives in the video and try to understand it at all. I'm one of the people that can't see myself in an open relationship, but I have very much enjoyed watching these to get a better understanding of that relationship style, because it truly is fascinating! Watch to gain understanding, not to judge because it's not your life and really doesn't affect you.
I'm in an open marriage with a child. Controversial but works for us! We have a strong foundation, no jealously, open free love, evolution & growth. Our parents say we are black hippies. Lol. #teamopenalltheway
Shan BOODY It's a journey especially being young - no one gets it. Took a lot of work. 7 years of being monogamish and then deciding that an open marriage would be our design. Lots of studying. In fact, JuJu Mama was the only one openly talking about this topic years ago when we began exploring our love design. We have rules of course but freedom to not block connections is freeing.
I will never understand how people can be in open relationships. Like you do you, but if you're really down for someone you will NOT be okay with them sleeping around with other people. I will never ever understand.
God some of the comments... even well intentioned sounding people are like passive aggressively against what y'all got it's so?? Idk but I love your guys' love ❤️
I support open relationships. My question is: would you have a child/children while in an open relationship. If so, how would you raise/ educate them to understand what your situation is?
+Liberty Marshall I think so. But mind you I don't know bc I don't have a child. I had to explain what I do for a living to my 5 year old niece not long ago. It went very well! I think kids really move off of energies vs principles.
Shan BOODY That's good to hear. Actually I just finished watching your interview you did on The View because I noticed that was one of the areas you covered. Thanks for the reply!! I love your videos and your outlook on life. It has opened my eyes a lot and its been incredibly helpful and thought provoking. 😘
I'm normally an if you happy, I'm happy for you person but sometimes Idk if buy this. Shan has said in videos that she is naturally a monogamous person, that she's been cheated on before and her only rule is really no deception - so this seems like she's doing this out of a fear of the pain of being cheated on again - not because she wants to be open. If I allow him to cheat and he's honest with me about it, then I'm not going to be hurt when it happens. It's working for them and I know they don't like to speculate about the future but I'm curious to see how things change if/when he does actually sleep w someone else.
+Scandal Fanatic look I'm all for a good suspicion but do you guys consider A) this is my UA-cam channel..if I wasn't gung ho about my relationship style I wouldn't share it! I'd keep it to myself so no one else would know. B) I study and talk about relationships for 80% of my life so please if you trust me enough to subscribe here trust me enough to know that I'm not desperately trying to keep a man by lying about my core needs to experience love on my terms. I'm so confused by some of you bc it seems like you watch my content but then the comments are so loopy!! All love I see the good in your intent and value that oxo and p.s. I've said sexually monogamous which I am in terms of male penetration
Shan BOODY Did my WCW just read me, ON Wednesday? For shame! I am crying over here - gave me a list, called me loopy and everything! Lololol. You lucky I think the world of you. I will say this: 1. Just bc you love someone and trust in their expertise doesn't mean you agree with everything they say. bobble-heads only in the comments. Got it. Will refrain. 2. The reason you are getting some of the "loopy" comments is probably bc you both have the most incredible, gorgeous, sexy, educated, talented, passionate, supportive, loving, partners - and it seems idk, loopy, to go outside of your relationship for what? Like someone prepared this fantastic feast for you but you decided to check around and see if you could find some better food. I know it doesn't have to make sense to anyone but you two but this is the reason ppl respond the way they do. It's bc with every video you do it makes less and less sense to people. 3. All love - apologies if I offended. Desperate? You? Never!!! But we all have fears and its human nature to try and protect ourselves.
+Scandal Fanatic I didn't call you loopy I said some of the comments are loopy. And Ive never asked you to agree with me but I do ask that you not assume I'm being manipulated. But most of all thank you for the love! Thank you for caring! And thank you for this exercise of critical thinking! I do think we should all try and move out of the ownership is love mentality and the notion that we need to setup walls to keep people from seeing they could do better ideology. I do believe relationships should be defined around what two people can do together as opposed to what they can't do as a result of being together. Anyway I said my piece and I thank you for coming in peace! What's your real name?
Shan BOODY It's Stacia. And congratulations on getting the part btwt!! Happy dance for you. 🕺🏾💃🏾 You don't have to respond but I did want to clarify - Like a person who has tried dieting but failed might decide to have a cheat day once a week on their next diet - on that day they can cheat without negative feeling attached, no guilt, shame failure. If I allow him to cheat, there's no anger/hurt/lies/pain. Nothing deceptive or desperate or manipulative about the initial comment - no shade was intended. Just the way the relationship comes off in one outsiders opinion. And ownership and love. Definitely agree there but the notion that either of you could do better? Sounds like a case of the best being the enemy of the good. If someone is looking for something better, clearly they're not satisfied so they should be single. I was taught that if you have something incredible, you appreciate it and hold onto with both hands. I LOVE the honest communication you have. Def on my how to love me instructions but for ME, if I'm in this great relationship and he still looking for better, time to cut him loose so he can be free to find it.
Sisters, BEFORE your Man convinces you that open relationships are the way forward, ask yourself one VERY IMPORTANT question before you jump in at the deep end. The question you must ask yourself is this: "If my Man loves me as much as he claims he does.....then why is he happy for other guys to have sex with me? Think about it my sisters......think about it.
Frances JAMES because your partner should want you to experience life and not face restrictions and to some that may involve sex with others. It’s your partner truly loving every facet of you
This just seems like more work than being easier and I'm lazy lol. Seems really complicated. I don't understand the wanting to be free but then trying to attach limits and rules at the same time.
The more I've watched Shannon talk about this the more I become put off by it. I respect that they both feel that this works for them though. But for me, it will never quite make sense and I just can't wrap my mind around not being someone's everything in the way that they don't feel the need to entertain someone else. My heart can't take that.
Even though I am not in an open relationship, my partner and I are honest with each other about appreciating the attractiveness of another person, etc. The difference is if attraction leads to wanting a date or more, be honest and love enough to leave. This is what works for us.
Seems to me like open relationships are for people who can't be monogamous. Sooooo this just let's them have a woman or man at home with all the perks and have the ability to screw around.
And monogamy is just for people who can't be polyamorous/open. Sooooo this just lets them own another person's body and actions, whether or not they agreed to the terms and conditions you may have never officially set.
this is so hedonistic oh my gosh. im sorry but i personally am not selfish enough to demand all these things from my partner nor do i want to. i respect that you do though.
loyalty is worth way more to me than being "desired" by other people, I guess that's where people who are in an open relationship and people who arent differ.
I personally am not interested in an open relationship, but its very intriguing to learn about by watching multiple videos of you guys' & how it works for yall. Not everything will work for anybody so I hate seeing all these generalized comments, we're all different people!
If only other people thought the way you guys do. 🤦🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️ It's hard to find people who are open and trustworthy to be able to be in an open relationship successfully.
trust I believe is a very integral ingredient. I have to know that you are comfortable being and owning up to who you are and what your natural choices are
I wasn't going to comment b/c I don't want to sound like i know your life or anythng like that, but I do recognize body language and energy and I've watched a couple of you guys' videos on this topic and it seems like Jared is uncomfortable either with sharing all of this or the open relationship in itself. I can't put my finger on it, but something seems off/dishonest with his answers.
yes, bc he is a dick. he doesnt care as much as she does about anything and he has to fake a lot of it for the sake of not making her look like the in love woman falling all over the very disinterested asshole who convinced his girlfriend that oopen relationships were a good thing. he sucks
Shannon seems like a very intelligent, articulate, independent thinking, kind of woman while her man seems very stunted, not just intellectually but also in terms of maturity. They just don’t look all that compatible.
I'M ENGAGED NOW BUT FIND OUT TO WHO...ua-cam.com/video/U5wbUUZYtVc/v-deo.html
Shan BOODY You've obviously come to a point in your life that you know men cannot be faithful and have decided to go this OR route. You know they will end up going somewhere else why not just give it a label!
💛❤💛❤Listen up! The moment your partner tells you that they will leave you if SOMEONE BETTER COMES ALONG,,is the moment you SHOULD GET THE HELL OUTTA THAT RELATIONSHIP! It's OVER....... this is from personal past experience.... believe me it's done when you or him express that!💛❤💛❤
Kateri [Kat] Levasseur but he married her so mind your business. It works for them
Lol u trolling ur own vid
shes allowed to sleep with other men too. @@katerilevasseur8119
"Comparison is the thief of JOY"... AMEN
Drop Jared's skincare routine tho😩
Crystal Chinaelo I believe it's called 'Youth.'
Or just genetics..
Its genetics. His dad's skin is 🔥🔥. His dad is fine too.
I've actually been talking with my boyfriend about open relationships (the concept, if we'd be comfortable with it, what it means, etc.) largely because watching your videos has really piqued some curiosities and questions in my psyche of how and why this works for some people. My bf and I basically concluded that it wasn't for us, although we both of us agreed that we'd talk about/consider it if either of us was more seriously curious down the line. I will say that even being able to honestly talk about it and knowing that its a not off-limits conversation is an incredible feeling. What started as a talk about being "open" ended in us understanding more about what we look for in intimacy and what drives attraction and jealousy for us. Thanks Shan! keep doing what you do
+nehab These are my fav kinds of comments!! Ones that are reflective, respectful and come with a story lol (guys I loooooove your stories) moving this to the top oxo
Shan BOODY I can't believe you actually responded lol! Thanks for your time :)
+nehab anytime lover
All your open relationship videos make me want more and more to try this kind of relationship ! You guys seem so happy and the trust and respect you both have for eachother is very inspirational !! Keep up the awesome content shannon ! Love you ❤️
nehab a
"i would not want the third person to feel like the third person"
damn that's hella considerate. there are so many couples who honestly dgaf about bi people as people and just want them to be a convenient add-on to their threesomes. thanks for being cool, i guess is what i'm saying? haha.
theo so true
She said it because of her fear of being that third person herself when they do a threesome. I'd bet you anything that's what she thought of before she turned it around and said it.
I like that I'm living in a world where couples get to self-define what their relationship looks and feels like. Ain't nobody's business what you choose to do with your happy little selves. Rock on!! ❤️👏🙌
AliDu TRUTH
A lot of people who don't like open relationships, sure do watch a lot of videos (and comment) about open relationships 😂 if it's not for you, that's fine....but keep it pushing. We don't go around bashing the "traditional/monogamous" relationship structure because to each their own. Let these two beautiful people enjoy their beautiful life, while you go build your own. Whatever that means to you. ❤️✌🏼
+Katrina Lee I know eh! I'm not mad tho the more the merrier is the name of the youtube game oxo
Katrina Lee you actually do, which is the funny thing
Katrina Lee having an opposing opinion doesn’t mean someone is bashing yours or putting it down.
Shan BOODY because it’s controversial and it attracts attention. Also some people just don’t understand and they want to learn
Reem Alexander clearly she wasn’t talking about those with just opposing opinions 🙄
If an open relationship is not for you that's fine but why be borderline disrespectful to Shannon and Jared's relationship. CLEARLY their relationship works for them. 🤷🏽♀️
Jared is so much more comfortable on camera now!
I know!!!! I'm amazed
If this is comfortable, I wonder how shy he was before.
Look, i'm old school...If you have to see other people while in a relationship with me then we're not in a relationship. That's a friends with benefit ordeal.
RedNiNo Fioz I agree because she said at first she gets jealous if he's with someone..if you're gonna be jealous then you shouldn't be in an open relationship..if I have a man I want him to be my one and only and I'm his one and only.
Diana Garcia yeah, thats my opinion but you know..Diffrent strokes for diffrent folks lol
RedNiNo Fioz Interesting that "relationship" is defined in multiple ways by countless "couples" on this planet. Can't say that I've heard any one consistent definition. The words monogamous, open, polymory precede the word "relationship" in the lives of countless couples. That word is pretty much self defined so hey, just do you.
Oxford dictionary: Relationship - noun. The way in which two *or more people* or things are connected, or the state of being connected.
They were friends with benefits previously. Then they got to a point where sex was no longer the only benefit, and now they're sharing their entire lives together. That's definitely way more serious than friends with benefits.
I can never be in an open relationship. Power to those who can. It's emotionally and mentally draining. However, I'm old school when it comes to marriage. I've been married for 19 years and am still in love.
+Jacqueline S congratulations that's awesome!
My husband and i have been together 19 years been poly off and on. We opened the marriage officially a year ago and are still VERY MUCHO in love still. I feel that love and bond helps make this work
same girl same lol. 9 years and counting! And we still honest with each other. Heck we check out other ppl all the time. Just don't date them lol
I was a virgin when I got married at 24 ---inexperienced in sex and romance. I married my best friend. We had known each other since we were 15.
Less than a year into being married he suggested an open relationship.
I was in an instant shocked , confused and heartbroken but agreed to experiment with the notion --partly because we were intellectuals and I thought I could intellectualize that monogamy was a cerebral construct and that humans could potentially love more than one person at a time.
We didn't get very far in that experiment--- I became wildly jealous and extremely anxious ( mind you this was 20 years ago before it was a trend ). The thought of him giving his affection to another woman , a stranger, just floored me and made me paranoid.
Its something I would say that you don't want go into blindly. But maybe that is because I personally connect sex & love .
Polyamory basically injured my psyche and my ability trust men for many years but worse it injured my connection with him and ultimately contributed to the unraveling of the marriage.
I've never really been the same since. Im still highly anxious about the thought of a partner leaving me for someone else and I find it very hard to go with the flow in the beginning phase of new relationships. Which ultimately sabotages the connection.
The idea of dating multiple people casually and without commitment also throws me off balance.
In short, that little polyamory experiment for me broke a spiritual covenant which basically messed with my mind and heart in a very bad way for a very long time.
Only now am I finally getting counseling to try and show up more confidently in romantic relationships.
Maybe I was too old fashion for that experiment -- or there was bot enough communication.
But I know what I like and appreciate and that is a Man who chooses to be faithful and monogamous.
It makes me feel safe and protected in life and a partnership.
Im amazed how the young women of today don't seem bothered.
I actually wish I could be that open and relaxed. I feel that partnership should never be a jail or prison on another human beings desires.
But Im not when it comes to love. I prefer learning depths of one person to breadth of experience with many.
Good luck to everyone out there. The times we are in today are not for the faint of heart. 🙄
Hey all! Thanks for continuing this conversation with us. Be sure to click the "i" in the righthand corner to take the poll so I can learn more about you!
Shan BOODY this open relationship topic fascinates me I don't think it's for me but I love the communication that you two have.
Terrence Flowers 🌹
Well... I'm a monger so obviously I've got to be in an open relationship.
Shan BOODY From a quick browse through the comment section, you NEED to keep making open relationship videos. It seems like people are having a hard time grasping that it's a mutual agreement between partners that includes boundaries and, especially compared to traditional couples, is based on 100% trust. I've never been in an open relationship myself (closest I've experienced would be a casual dating relationship where we both knew that our current lives/goals weren't going to match up, but we prioritized each other over anyone else while having the freedom to seek someone who would fit) but I totally get it. I feel like more couples would be better off if they considered an open relationship instead of the black and white ultimatum of monogamy or breakup.
For the Open Relationships and You question, I couldn't find an answer that matched but I've been in an open relationship and now I'm in a monogamous relationship. And I still absolutely adore the guy I was in an open relationship with, we still talk, and it was one of the healthiest relationships I've ever had! Awesome video.
Fuck naw I need honesty but in a monogamous relationship. I don't want to have an open raltionship only to feel like there will be honesty if I take that route. I just want a fucking loyal ass dude that can be honest. If he isnt feeling me then leave, dont string me around while your ass is developing crushes on everyone else ..... smh
From this video, I get the impression that Shannon would be ready to give up the open relationship if Jared was ready to commit to just her. But from his answers, that is never going to happen
Olivia M i agree with you so much in the videos shes made before she was with him she never mentioned open relationships at all and now all of a sudden shes so down for it. Im 90% sure this was all his idea and it was either she had to agree to it or he'd leave her.
Olivia M her face when he said yes I would be open to an open marriage.... 😒
Pointless Name - A lot of the things that she's saying point to their opposing views on the matter. A lot of what Shannon says does suggest that she's more open to a monogamous commitment eventually, whereas a lot of what Jarred says suggests that he can't imagine being open to committing to her only.
Did we watch the same video?
I'm 100% sure she made the suggestion. That guy seems like a push over. You can feel her dominance through how she talks .
Maybe a video on jealousy and how to control it ...lub yu
They simply use the term "open relationship" and it triggers you and makes you uncomfortable based on your own perception of what that means. However, if you listen, the principle of what they're doing is simply being completely honest and open in a relationship with no boundaries; no matter what you're being honest about. We often hold back on being honest with our partners and honest with ourselves based on what we think should be allowed in a relationship, when in fact, our growth process as human beings is anything but linear. Relationships are not about ego and possession and rather about growth, and that growth process looks different for everyone. You hear the term "open relationship" and try to diminish it to sex with other people and having a lack of self control, when in fact what they are speaking about is the essence of unconditional love and trying to build a healthy relationship through practicing what they do in an attempt to break down an old destructive relationship paradigm. This is simply how they're choosing to try to do that right now, and it may or may not change as they grow and evolve more as with all things in life.
Open relationships is about sex with others. If it was based on unconditional love, why don't they try polyamory? Share your love with anyone, but they reduce the relationship to only being open with sex.
I love how much Jared says "like you said" cause it shows how much they agree on things and how much he values her opinion
no, its cause he doesnt really give a shit either way and has no thoughts on his own. hes a dick
@@ehsh3072 why would you say smth like this
He's looks EXACTLY like Justin Beiber
he does? maybe u need glasses!
Now that's all I can see lol
I thought i was the only one
Soriah Jenkins thanks a lot... I can't unsee this now lol 💀💀
Soriah Jenkins wow, I didn't see it at first.
Open relationships are weird af.
River Tuccaro And yet you spent 17+ minutes watching a video dedicated to open relationships, don't disrespect somebody's relationship just because you don't understand it or it wouldn't work for you
River Tuccaro it wasn't disrespectful tho
They might be weird for you but they are not weird for everybody. I'm sure there are lots of things that you do that other people think are weird. You can't live your life worrying about what other people think.
Then dont do it lol
Damn near everything is "weird" to someone else on this Earth. Diversity, buddy, it's what makes life beautiful.
Thank you for continuing to do videos like these no matter how shitty your comment section gets. I really do take something from all your videos like I know many others do!
Azteca Grandov Agreed! I really wish people could appreciate how authentic and beautiful, their conversations truly are.
does anybody think he looks like Justin Bieber ( now justin ) or is it just me 🤔....
Janat Soomro he does...alot
No!
I'm not made for an Open relation, I'm not gonna comment on yours.
The best part (for me) is the question (and Shannon 's answer)
'Would you leave me for someone else'?
I think your answer should fit everybody .
Good answer 👍🏽
I'm a jealous person. I'm still wondering how to overcome that feeling..
It takes a lot of time and patience with yourself. And in the meantime, just find something that you feel your confident in doing and do it. I hope you can build your self-esteem up enough to one day not be upset about not getting the girl/guy attention that you want for instance. You deserve to feel special because you are and hopefully when the time is right someone can show you just that.
Wtf is this wild ass shit😂 I'm actually bamboozled
I don't get the point of an open relationship. Is it solely based on having sex with other people and not having to label it as cheating? I don't get it... someone help me... lol P.S you should do a pro's and con's of open relationships video...
+The Movement pro it works for us. Con having to over explain why it works for us. Pro over explaining why it works for us bc it drives views. Con answering the same questions despite having over explained this throughout the three videos (and counting) on it
Shan BOODY I find your videos very interesting and informative.I think this is a good way for individuals in open relationship or monogamous relationships to communicate and stay informed good vid as always keep your heads up positive vibes all day 👽✌
The Movement this is so true ...it's just pure greed
I think the reason why open relationships work for some people is because, they themselves have a lot to offer and want to have multiple relationships meaning its not only about sex they want to experience intimacy with other people. At least that how i take it since 3 of my close friends are in long term open relationships themselves and thats what they have told me. Or some people just want plain sex, everyones different.
I dont get it neither, I never have. What do you need to experience other people for, if you two are in love with each other?
How many of you just have ONE friend?? Ok. You genuinely love all of them, right? Ok. It takes effort and consideration to maintain these friendships, yes? Ok. It's really honestly truly not that difficult of a concept to understand. If it's not for you, it's not for you. Some people don't like green peppers. Don't eat them. Don't shame people who do. It's not that big of a deal. Spending time trying to convince people who don't like green peppers that their lives will change for the better once they finally get with the program.....sounds ridiculous right? Yeah that's kind of how at least half of y'all sound. Its getting old. The whole point of the relationship styles that you all prefer is create happiness, yes? Ok. They are happy. Same destination. Different journey. People get so distracted from the point of everything. You are supported, Shannon.❤️
+LovingSoul61 this is my fav! Very insightful thanks for sharing
Shan BOODY ❤️
Assuming that you aren't sleeping with them, your friends can't give you STD's or have you unknowingly raising a child that isn't biologically yours. That's why we've evolved to have the emotion of jealously. To protect us from the cons of sleeping around. It's no different than why the emotion of fear exists. The problem I see with this discussion is that a lot of folks act as if there aren't tangible risks to promiscuous behavior.
I'm immature. I feed my jealousy. Cookies, milk, chicken...pretty much whatever it needs to flourish in my life. Lol Seriously tho, this conversation gets more and more interesting to hear (maybe because I'm simply so opposite you two). The parts of you guys that you are capable of "shutting off", for lack of better words, are so very vivid and dominant in myself. Like, Shan...I would've elbowed the girl at the show! 👊👊 Lol You guys are great. Interesting perspectives.
lol not chicken! You are witty! I like.
Shan BOODY Girl yes! I'm horrible. Lol But its one of the key reasons why I've been a fan of your content for some years now. Your channel has helped me to understand or at least gain a different perspective from nearly anything that enters my mind. I'm Bahamian and we're pretty closed minded so this content is great for me. Keep up the good work Queen. 🙏
What would you do if Jared had a baby with somebody else ?
Probably kick his ass for not using a condom!
This is a great question and I would love to know the answer.
I know a lot of people are shooketh by this type of relationship. I used to be too, but since learning about yours... I respect it. There's a real genuineness and romance that comes along with continuously choosing your partner while having the freedom to choose someone else. You never have to wonder about if this person loves you still. A lot of people stay together out of fear or obligation and become resentful because of it. Gwan gyal. Dweet.
I don’t think deep down she’s comfortable with it. She needs a 100% committed man.
he is committed
The hate and, in most cases, misunderstanding toward open relationships is wild to me. I've been in an open relationship for 5 years and the idea that I love my partner less or that he doesn't love me because we're sexually or emotionally involved with other people is crazy to me. At the end of the day, your relationship is whatever you and your partner want it to be. If it's monogamous, cool, if it's polyamorous, cool--if you're asexual, even, great. Just do what makes you happy so long as it doesn't impede the well-being of others~
I could never do this! But I'm so glad you both share so much of your relationship. It's eye opening!
Why is it easier to be honest in an open relationship? I'm currently in a monogamous relationship and I expect total honesty.
it's easier based on Jared's experience of being in a monogamous relationship vs being in our relationship. He was speaking for self, which is what I wanted to emphasize, it's not a universal fact by any means
God I love videos with you and Jared! I love the honesty, I love how deep these questions can get, I don't personally agree with open relationships but I'm glad you two are able to make it work, by setting boundaries and rules. I admire that. xo
I saw your face drop when he said yes to open marriage... I mean I understand the purpose of an open relationship, hell - i'm in one too. I think it allows for exploration most importantly but in marriage. I personally would have to disagree with it being open. That is my husband, for me and no-one else. Especially when kids start being brought into the equation.
I feel when jared said the closing of the open relationship leads to shadiness is something he needs to deal with (overtime). You can still communicate with your partner just as openly if not more so in a "closed" relationship.
+CoolKidOx there is nothing in this video that I was hearing for the first time ever so I was never surprised at the answer. This is actually the second time we filmed this video with the same questions as the first time the audio was bad (hence why I was paranoid about it this time). And i did validate that some people are able to achieve the level of honest and open communication that jared and I have in a closed relationship
+Shan BOODY ah OK! I understand that, forgive me for mistaking your reactions. & Yes, I respected how you kept saying "for you" as he was answering.
+Shan BOODY You are currently in an open relationship which is different from an open marriage I believe. Since you advocate one, you don't necessarily need to be sure/ or advocate the other. Can I get your stance on the prospect of being in an open marriage? What if he changed his mind & suddenly didn't want it open?
Looooving this hairstyle Shan!!
You guys have a beautiful love ❤️
Shan stop faking you know you wanna lock it down stop this he doesn't seem mentally stimulating enough for you
open relationships are better than going behind people's back and cheating
True but they both don’t know each other’s self worth that’s why.
How would you feel if he kissed another woman in front of you ?would you allow that ?
+Daisy Santos we don't use terms like "allow." He's not my parent and vice versa. If he chose to do that I'd have questions but I don't tell him what he's able to do
Shan BOODY cool 😊 i asked how you would "feel"?
I'll never understand how someone could be in a open relationship or in an open marriage especially. No disrespect to people in that type of relationship at all. I just wouldn't be able to do it.
if i loved my man i wouldn't want to be with anyone else tbh.
So is an open relationship essentially a polyamorous relationship? I have a hard time understanding this concept of an "open relationship" like basically you both are a couple, but still have the freedom to go out with other people.. what if you meet someone you really click with & spend more time with them & decide you'd like the same kind of relationship with them.. is this like an open relationship with multiple people? I'm very confused
Melanie Rivera Salvador you and me both. It's like having cake and eating it too.
'flirting is healthy'
Deeply intensifying sexual sensations Increasing vaginal lubrication
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It is! My husband and i are both very flirty and it's not an issue. We point out attractive people to one another too. We are married, not dead
@@jeniwatkins3297 idk why but the 'we're married not dead' made me laugh 😅 I want to get to that point.
@@maddyG7414 Thanks!! 😂 It's a great way t see it i think. I hope you too can get there one day.
Shan I have a question, a scenario.. to better understand you guys' relationship. Y'all touched on it briefly, but I'm still a bit curious. What if one of you meets someone you're interested in and wants to seriously pursue that person? The interest is deeper than a few dates, deeper than sexual relations, you really want to get to know that person.... do you guys' allow each other to keep seeing that person, talking to that person knowing that it could possibly lead to feelings being involved or would you give the other person an ultimatum and have to choose who they want to continue with? I apologize if my wording isn't the best. I hope you got the gist of my question..
lol she prolly didnt get the gist lmlml
Damn I actually had faith in this relationship till this video seems like Shan secretly wants something from Jared eventually that he is not going to give her
Like he's kinda going along with with this till he takes off in his career
Let me restate my opinion especially cause im never the one to comment. I listens, respect others views and keep it moving
But Shannon run ..
He doesn't realize or maybe ya dont realize it's un equally yoked he's complacent your Hoping it will change .. most of ya thumbnail it SEEMS TO ME your chasing still, even through a picture Shannon I have watched your past videos.. I understand what you've been through first hand ..dont fall for it u give too much Shannon he yes your right to support his music but I know you feel uneasiness and
Yo..he SHOULD B LUCKKYYY TO HAVE EVEN TAKIN UP THIS MUCH OF YOUR TIME!
pow pow that what i was thinking because it seems like in every video he's in they have to mention his little rap career.
She seems so much more into him than he is into her. He mentions he actually wants her to leave him, where as she’s scared to lose him. And when he says he’s scared to lose her, I felt it wasn’t sincere. Love is blind I guess.. but who knows? Maybe my red flags are some else’s happiness that I do not understanding.
This is such a great video. Have you guys taken the Myers Briggs Personality Test? I'm interested to know what your types are. #hervibeztv
Anything open ended is very unsettling to me because we are human and we are naturally wired to be curious about or to desire the next best thing. (Case and point the iphone lol jk😜)There will always be someone smarter, prettier, and richer because no one has it all. There will always be someone with more intrigue. Especially in the case of long-term relationship because after 15 or 20 years you pretty much know everything that there is to know about your partner so naturally there is curiosity when a new person comes around. I wouldn't feel comfortable telling my partner that I wouldn't be heartbroken if they toss me to the side when the next best thing comes along. There has to be some loyalty and accountability in a partnership in my humble opinion. But with all that being said if two people agree that being open works for them, from day one, then GREAT! As long as no one gets hurt sound righteous to me.
I know I could not be in an open relationship but I don't judge others who are. It is THEIR life! We are so conditioned to one way to have a relationship when that just isn't the case. The ways in which people choose to express their sexuality and parts of themaelvesl, as long as consensual and legal, is up to them. Everyone in the comments bashing it should maybe try to learn more about it and not feed into the hegemony of what defines a relationship✨
What you and Jared share is almost as beautiful as the two of you are.
I absolutely respect their type of relationship 💯
But I am not the type of person that can do it😂
Can we can jareds skin care routine ?!! 👌👌
he's one of those "never had acne" people
Shan BOODY some people are just blessed 😪 lol
I love watching you Shannon but just guard your heart, because if he falls in love and wants to marry someone else that shit will hurt you no matter how much you may disagree!!
+Cannady Bell girl when did I ever deny that there would be pain! Of course it would hurt!
Shan BOODY you replied😀 I wasn't trying to offend you but I don't want you to get hurt.. I've been and it really hurt to the core.
Just don't get the point...sorry 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
I personally don't agree with open relationships. Yes you can be attracted to other people while being in a relationship but to me that's really messy. But not only that, I would feel bad for the other people involved. Even if you're upfront about it with other people they may not realize what they're getting into and catch feelings. I just feel like someone ends up hurt in the end. I think it only benefits people who are scared of commitment or who have been so hurt in the past that this makes them feel like "it's okay if they see other people because I'm ALLOWING it this time". I'm not gonna judge people who are in it and if it works for other people cool I just don't see the point.
Truth
Everything is all fun and games until someone gets pregnant and is neither of the ones who are in the relationship
OOP
Something about Shan seems like she's not really fully into the whole open relationship thing but is convincing herself that she is.
ssnmemak yes she’s only doing it for him he loves being able to do what he wants and not get in trouble for it ! Plus he keeps saying only a little jealous and he’s only saying that because she’s saying she’s jealous, if that makes sense lol
I'm in a good ol fashion controlled relationship lol I got all kind of rules and so does he .. yet oddly enough for 3 years now it's been amazing. We are very honest with each other and developed a bestfriend relationship to where we can be out in public and both agree our waiter has a fat ass, or he would say "I see you would go for that buff nigga over there" lmaoo😹😹 only difference is we don't act on it . I find all your videos on open relationships VERY interesting to the point I made him sit down and watch this one with me . We both felt like we too crazy for this open relationship but both felt a respect for yal relationship bc we understand what works for you works for you therefore nobody really can judge yal or us ❤️
I did not want this to end. I really love the vulnerability of this beautiful relationship. I am currently single. I think this is a great way to have a relationship and I do think Shannon is right about it being for some couples and not for others. I love that you both want the best for each other. I honestly don't know how my next relationship is going to work or with who or when lol.
In terms of dating, can you give examples. Like obviously you guys are not looking for other people but is it just like "oh I met this cool ass person last night and I want to take him or her out." ??
Are either of you guys dating other people now? And what does that look like?
I need more videos like this! I have so many other questions. I really appreciate you guys sharing this part of you with us.
Who else was there for the live stream 🙋🏽🙋🏽🙋🏽🙋🏽
My girl
Shan BOODY I LOVE YOU 💜💜
Purple Storm meeee
🙋🏻
Although I don't understand wanting an open relationship, I'm appalled by the condescension coming from people in these comments, acting like you can't be happy because you're in an open relationship. Just because I don't understand it doesn't mean I'm going to assume MY way is the only way. I'm sorry people are acting so ignorant Shan :/
Though an open relationship doesn’t work for myself and my fiancé. The views you two have about being jealous, not worrying about things you can’t control, openness of communication, and not hiding things are very integral for a long lasting relationship. Also, clearly defining boundaries is so important to.
My wife and I tried an open relationship, were we both were dating the same guy. It was great in the beginning but ended horribly (bcuz of the guy) and bcuz of that we no longer will have an open marriage.
I'm in an Open relationship. The role that Jealous plays in my life is self reflectance. As my ability to identify jealous and the reason why I am jealous grows, the journey it has taken me is through the path of self affirmation and inner reflection of Why am I jealous, is it because of insecurity (Often times it is) Is it the fear of Missing out ( Some of the times it is) raising questions like "Am I good enough? Does that last question even matter? what does being in a relationship even mean?". Open relationships come with lots of turmoil but can bring about the biggest freedom, and with that freedom can come with the deepest of Love because everyday we choose to come home to each other, default to watch tv on the couch together, and to eat dinner together and to keep each other's feelings of insecurity, or FOMO at ease, and to allow each other to enjoy things in life that may or may not involve the other - which includes exploring new love interests (Compersion).
+JayZhang516 😍 this was eye and heart opening for me!!
I'll tell you that it was not an easy road because it involves a younger, more impulsive, more emotionally driven, version of myself haha
Thank you for doing this! It's great to be informed about different types of relationships. Love your videos💓
Her face when he said yeah for open marriage, that's messed up that's not marriage that's bs
According to whose laws? Every religion on earth has sanctified multi-marriages, often within constraints that work for the people involved in the marriage.
A room with an open door is still a room.
Open relationship = I am just dating and you are my fav to date ..... I am judging, but not judging 😂😂😂.... I read in the Harvard review that multitasking never works on any level. You think you are doing more , but the quality of whatever you doing is greatly reduced. you are not a couple. You are just very good friends that hang out and have sex. She is basically what my uncle would call his bottom bitch . Harsh I know, but what I do know when people do this there is always a point where someone wants more. As you age, you want stability and guarantees. I really feel a lot of women trick themselves into wanting this because they know the man they are with are not ready. Def not say this is you Shan... but I have gf who say he's going to cheat anyway so this is easier because at least I know.But y'all are young live it up. I def wasn't angel, but as you age you see the world, love, and relationships differently. Tread lightly. Best of luck
Jared and that flawless skin. smh. it's plain rude how good it is.
I really love those types of video
Maria Lpz same
You have no idea how helpful and informative this was for me and how amazingly inspiring you and Jared have been to the discovery of my own preference of relationship style because of all of your videos and how open and candid you two have been. I truly thank you both. Sharing this with everyone I know!!
Deeply intensifying sexual sensations Increasing vaginal lubrication
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I think having an open marriage is messed up simply because if you can sleep with someone else you have not been able to receive what you need from the relationship. Call it what you want but if you have someone you want to be with having another woman or man share their genitals with them other than you their partner is just messed up!!
Chill lmao. If it's not for you it's not for you. But I think it takes courage to talk about their open relationship so maybe don't shit all over their truth?
@@vondonstrut218 lmao chill I don’t want my man coming up to me and saying he wants to fuck and date other women its called self respect
@@leleyang3088 1 year too late on this lmfao. many people do open relationships. if it aint for you then it aint for you.
i like big women, i like small women, i like medium size women. i like tall women, i like short women, i like inbetween height women. i like a variety of different shapes and sizes of women as well as different ethnicities. 1 woman cannot be all these at once.
this is a very important self reflection. A friend of mine recently found out her partner that she lives with is a serial cheater. When caught he pointed out to her how she doesn't fulfill his needs but I pointed out to her when dealing with someone who needs the attention of MANY people at one time no one person can clearly be all things and it's unfair to say that
Open relationships are literally "I wanna cheat but I don't want to get in trouble for it" 🙄 .... Shannon I know this isn't my place to say but you deserve so much better. A man that knows what and WHO he wants.
canadianbeylover so what if both people agree and it works for them, who are you judge.
I feel like he said/implied "I don't want to feel trapped" instead of just owning up to saying this is the woman I wanna be with, but on the flip side I guess it's healthy to be in a space where you feel open
stupid bitches, at least they are honest, u guys fell for christianity programming about slut shaming its perfectly normal for a girl to want to cheat after 3 years! we are not meant for 1 partner
...canadianbeylover you sound single...
Do you realize that if she was so unhappy in this relationship that she wouldn't have stayed for 2 years? You're acting like he held a gun to her head and forced his beliefs on her.. If she wanted to leave she would have.. There are 7 billion people in the world they aren't the only ones doing this that life is for some people and it isn't for others
Stop lying to yourself
+jamztam okay! Adding this to my to do list right after I fold the laundry
LOL SHANNON KEEP WITH THE SAVAGERY YES
Ok shannon, I really like your hard work and what you represent. A strong black woman. But we all see your face when your man talk about open mariage... what ? What about your couple when your children gonna ask you why daddy flirt sometimes with other woman ? I think this type of relationship is good in your present. But in the futur , pregnant or with children. Do you think is very healthy ?
i love your humor and positive comeback so beautiful never knew women like you exist even your videos with rick ayoshucks you always had a glow!!
jamztam lol!
Your strawmen are quite pathetic...
What makes you think it would be harmful or confusing to potential children to have multiple parents in an extended family to confide in and find comfort when they need confirmation, have questions or get a broken heart?
How would it be more confusing than for example living next door to or in the same appartment building as a number of aunts and uncles?
Kids are not stupid or simple.
Wow i know I'm probably late but he looks exactly like Justin Bieber but slightly better looking. The conversation that is being had is amazing though I've never known anyone with an open relationship
I have been observing the way Shannon non-verbally communicates with those whom she features on her videos, I love watching her because simply she's sincere, she wholeheartedly means everything she says. With Jared, she's calm and centered, proud and content with what she's got (with him). Her voice tone is calm and loving, she keeps her eyes fixed on his and doesn't shy away from what's being discussed. She genuinely smiles, giggles and laughs and it makes me (at least) happy. She loves what she is doing.
I love, love seeing her happy.
I appreciate your experience and you sharing your relationship with youtube, in an open and honest way. I do not agree with the open relationship phenomenon, not because I am not an open person it's just not right for me personally. I think especially when children come into a relationship/marriage, I personally do not think having other people involved in that union is something is okay for me, that is too complicated for me to even accept, especially involving health. But it is an interesting social experience hearing other peoples opinions, if it works for you that's great, I would be interested in hearing from people that do this long term and the effects it has on them.
"i wanna see you adored the way I see you." HUUUNNNNYYY. Some girl Twerking on him isnt her adoring him. I do not agree w open relationships. Ima get what I Deserve and thats soneone who knows my worth. Tf. Lol
I feel jealous when something great happens for my friends, even though it is something that I particularly have no interest in. I still root for them, but part of me feels like a failure in that sense! I know i'm not the only one that happens to, so I just let it pass. I'm working on my first instinct not being "what about me?!"
Video ideas:
1. More collaborations.
2. What does marriage look like in 2017? Does marriage even make sense anymore?
3. Group makeout (mmf or mmmf). Yes...a kissing video with more than one man. Pick 2 or 3 guys with different kissing/intimacy styles and guys who you have made out with before or who you have always been curious about.. and do a demonstration to show who is the strongest, most talented kisser & caresser. Show what style is best for you. We don't get to see you indulge enough.
4. Product unboxings.
5. Rate the various dating websites and apps. Conduct a survey to see what apps or websites people are using and how they rate the options out there.
6. Survey of women's fantasies and adult vid categories + suggestions on fem/women-centric p*rn. What are you all into? Novel based stuff? Is a storyline always required...since women are far less visual and more emotionally invested? Or are many of you as kinky and freaky as men? Have women tell their fantasies... either through an interview style...or acted out & narrated. And yes Shannon... you too. Tell us at least one of your fantasies. It doesn't have to be the one from the Hannah video... you seemed scared about that one... but at least try telling another.
+Blue Indigo good ideas!
I think an open relationship is a relationship involving two cheaters who want to be together while cheating on each other and knowing about it.......I hope this "open relationship" ends soon
אַל תַּעֲשׂוּ עֵין הָרַע
It means in Hebrew don't do evil eye yourself. Don't talk about yourselves so much as this will destroy you,
Love you from Israel
did you guys got into a open relationship becausre you are low key afraid of commitment to only one person
no I literally don't do or not do anything because of "fear." I do things bc I know myself and what makes me my best
All of the people that are shitting on open relationships because they:
A. Commented before they watched any of the videos
B. Don't take into consideration that maybe different types of people might actually function better in a different type of relationship than them.
C. Don't make an effort to really grasp the explanations that she gives in the video and try to understand it at all.
I'm one of the people that can't see myself in an open relationship, but I have very much enjoyed watching these to get a better understanding of that relationship style, because it truly is fascinating!
Watch to gain understanding, not to judge because it's not your life and really doesn't affect you.
I highly doubt you two finding anything better than what you both collectively have built
I'm in an open marriage with a child. Controversial but works for us! We have a strong foundation, no jealously, open free love, evolution & growth. Our parents say we are black hippies. Lol. #teamopenalltheway
+SamSoPretty this is great! I would love to hear about your dynamic!
Shan BOODY It's a journey especially being young - no one gets it. Took a lot of work. 7 years of being monogamish and then deciding that an open marriage would be our design. Lots of studying. In fact, JuJu Mama was the only one openly talking about this topic years ago when we began exploring our love design. We have rules of course but freedom to not block connections is freeing.
I will never understand how people can be in open relationships. Like you do you, but if you're really down for someone you will NOT be okay with them sleeping around with other people. I will never ever understand.
God some of the comments... even well intentioned sounding people are like passive aggressively against what y'all got it's so?? Idk but I love your guys' love ❤️
I support open relationships. My question is: would you have a child/children while in an open relationship. If so, how would you raise/ educate them to understand what your situation is?
+Liberty Marshall I think so. But mind you I don't know bc I don't have a child. I had to explain what I do for a living to my 5 year old niece not long ago. It went very well! I think kids really move off of energies vs principles.
Shan BOODY That's good to hear. Actually I just finished watching your interview you did on The View because I noticed that was one of the areas you covered. Thanks for the reply!! I love your videos and your outlook on life. It has opened my eyes a lot and its been incredibly helpful and thought provoking. 😘
I'm normally an if you happy, I'm happy for you person but sometimes Idk if buy this. Shan has said in videos that she is naturally a monogamous person, that she's been cheated on before and her only rule is really no deception - so this seems like she's doing this out of a fear of the pain of being cheated on again - not because she wants to be open. If I allow him to cheat and he's honest with me about it, then I'm not going to be hurt when it happens. It's working for them and I know they don't like to speculate about the future but I'm curious to see how things change if/when he does actually sleep w someone else.
+Scandal Fanatic look I'm all for a good suspicion but do you guys consider
A) this is my UA-cam channel..if I wasn't gung ho about my relationship style I wouldn't share it! I'd keep it to myself so no one else would know.
B) I study and talk about relationships for 80% of my life so please if you trust me enough to subscribe here trust me enough to know that I'm not desperately trying to keep a man by lying about my core needs to experience love on my terms. I'm so confused by some of you bc it seems like you watch my content but then the comments are so loopy!!
All love I see the good in your intent and value that oxo and p.s. I've said sexually monogamous which I am in terms of male penetration
Shan BOODY Did my WCW just read me, ON Wednesday? For shame! I am crying over here - gave me a list, called me loopy and everything! Lololol. You lucky I think the world of you. I will say this:
1. Just bc you love someone and trust in their expertise doesn't mean you agree with everything they say. bobble-heads only in the comments. Got it. Will refrain.
2. The reason you are getting some of the "loopy" comments is probably bc you both have the most incredible, gorgeous, sexy, educated, talented, passionate, supportive, loving, partners - and it seems idk, loopy, to go outside of your relationship for what? Like someone prepared this fantastic feast for you but you decided to check around and see if you could find some better food. I know it doesn't have to make sense to anyone but you two but this is the reason ppl respond the way they do. It's bc with every video you do it makes less and less sense to people.
3. All love - apologies if I offended. Desperate? You? Never!!! But we all have fears and its human nature to try and protect ourselves.
+Scandal Fanatic I didn't call you loopy I said some of the comments are loopy. And Ive never asked you to agree with me but I do ask that you not assume I'm being manipulated. But most of all thank you for the love! Thank you for caring! And thank you for this exercise of critical thinking! I do think we should all try and move out of the ownership is love mentality and the notion that we need to setup walls to keep people from seeing they could do better ideology. I do believe relationships should be defined around what two people can do together as opposed to what they can't do as a result of being together. Anyway I said my piece and I thank you for coming in peace! What's your real name?
Shan BOODY It's Stacia. And congratulations on getting the part btwt!! Happy dance for you. 🕺🏾💃🏾 You don't have to respond but I did want to clarify - Like a person who has tried dieting but failed might decide to have a cheat day once a week on their next diet - on that day they can cheat without negative feeling attached, no guilt, shame failure. If I allow him to cheat, there's no anger/hurt/lies/pain. Nothing deceptive or desperate or manipulative about the initial comment - no shade was intended. Just the way the relationship comes off in one outsiders opinion. And ownership and love. Definitely agree there but the notion that either of you could do better? Sounds like a case of the best being the enemy of the good. If someone is looking for something better, clearly they're not satisfied so they should be single. I was taught that if you have something incredible, you appreciate it and hold onto with both hands. I LOVE the honest communication you have. Def on my how to love me instructions but for ME, if I'm in this great relationship and he still looking for better, time to cut him loose so he can be free to find it.
Sisters, BEFORE your Man convinces you that open relationships are the way forward, ask yourself one VERY IMPORTANT question before you jump in at the deep end. The question you must ask yourself is this: "If my Man loves me as much as he claims he does.....then why is he happy for other guys to have sex with me? Think about it my sisters......think about it.
Frances JAMES because your partner should want you to experience life and not face restrictions and to some that may involve sex with others. It’s your partner truly loving every facet of you
This just seems like more work than being easier and I'm lazy lol. Seems really complicated. I don't understand the wanting to be free but then trying to attach limits and rules at the same time.
The more I've watched Shannon talk about this the more I become put off by it. I respect that they both feel that this works for them though. But for me, it will never quite make sense and I just can't wrap my mind around not being someone's everything in the way that they don't feel the need to entertain someone else. My heart can't take that.
I feel the same way...
Even though I am not in an open relationship, my partner and I are honest with each other about appreciating the attractiveness of another person, etc. The difference is if attraction leads to wanting a date or more, be honest and love enough to leave. This is what works for us.
Seems to me like open relationships are for people who can't be monogamous. Sooooo this just let's them have a woman or man at home with all the perks and have the ability to screw around.
But she's also fooling around at her own (negotiated) discretion.
It's not just him who's open.
They BOTH are.
And monogamy is just for people who can't be polyamorous/open. Sooooo this just lets them own another person's body and actions, whether or not they agreed to the terms and conditions you may have never officially set.
I'm laughing at Jared and his thing with the mic
this is so hedonistic oh my gosh. im sorry but i personally am not selfish enough to demand all these things from my partner nor do i want to. i respect that you do though.
loyalty is worth way more to me than being "desired" by other people, I guess that's where people who are in an open relationship and people who arent differ.
I personally am not interested in an open relationship, but its very intriguing to learn about by watching multiple videos of you guys' & how it works for yall. Not everything will work for anybody so I hate seeing all these generalized comments, we're all different people!
If only other people thought the way you guys do. 🤦🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️ It's hard to find people who are open and trustworthy to be able to be in an open relationship successfully.
trust I believe is a very integral ingredient. I have to know that you are comfortable being and owning up to who you are and what your natural choices are
I wasn't going to comment b/c I don't want to sound like i know your life or anythng like that, but I do recognize body language and energy and I've watched a couple of you guys' videos on this topic and it seems like Jared is uncomfortable either with sharing all of this or the open relationship in itself. I can't put my finger on it, but something seems off/dishonest with his answers.
yes, bc he is a dick. he doesnt care as much as she does about anything and he has to fake a lot of it for the sake of not making her look like the in love woman falling all over the very disinterested asshole who convinced his girlfriend that oopen relationships were a good thing. he sucks
Shannon seems like a very intelligent, articulate, independent thinking, kind of woman while her man seems very stunted, not just intellectually but also in terms of maturity. They just don’t look all that compatible.