Porch Pooper Must Be Stopped

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 5 тис.

  • @Genji-o6r
    @Genji-o6r 2 місяці тому +11701

    I like to imagine that he doesnt have bad hygiene but is changing into that outfit each time he comes back like some kind of superhero uniform

    • @Shiestey
      @Shiestey 2 місяці тому +785

      Now I’m just imagining him taking off that outfit and placing it to the side like a work uniform. He goes about his day in totally different clothes and gets home like “time to clock in”

    • @nesamdoom
      @nesamdoom 2 місяці тому +190

      I'm hoping it's early days of supervillian costume. Otherwise this dude running round in socks with no bottoms

    • @Tony-nt5zd
      @Tony-nt5zd 2 місяці тому +188

      This is my shitting costume

    • @deeemee
      @deeemee 2 місяці тому +48

      I thought this would be so they see him wear only those clothes thus giving him more freedom with his outfits when he's going out minding his own business

    • @Grimnirs_Oath
      @Grimnirs_Oath 2 місяці тому +32

      @@deeemeehe’s not wearing a mask though he’d still be recognised by people that know him

  • @morimementos
    @morimementos 2 місяці тому +9505

    “He’s not trying to force entry” but he sure is trying to force exit

  • @sizzle8477
    @sizzle8477 2 місяці тому +18270

    Mark Rober’s arch nemesis

    • @dylanisntvibing
      @dylanisntvibing 2 місяці тому +144

      All bots

    • @FaceyDuck
      @FaceyDuck 2 місяці тому +404

      It’s okay, Mark Rober would engineer his way out of it

    • @youtubeterminatedmyaccount8882
      @youtubeterminatedmyaccount8882 2 місяці тому +131

      if a reply section has only 5 or 6 replies its just bots and 1 or 2 real people pointing out that theres bots

    • @Luv_Sammy
      @Luv_Sammy 2 місяці тому +3

      Who?

    • @endless4954
      @endless4954 2 місяці тому +6

      Here before this blows uo

  • @zaccwiggins
    @zaccwiggins 2 місяці тому +430

    The fact that he returns multiple times with such incredible consistency and technique, and he’s never caught, implies that he’s done this before. We’re dealing with a professional pooper.

    • @hanzwusrt6755
      @hanzwusrt6755 Місяць тому +2

      I think the home owner shits his own door.

    • @IHateAmer1ca
      @IHateAmer1ca 22 дні тому

      @@hanzwusrt6755That’s more risky than doing it to a strangers, If one neighbour sees you game over.

  • @cherylfrey2189
    @cherylfrey2189 2 місяці тому +4231

    It used to be, poop in a bag, write a mean note on it, and put it on a porch, Now its just poop on the porch, so sad to see people have lost creativity.

    • @randomenvelope
      @randomenvelope 2 місяці тому +331

      We live in a minimalist garbage timeline

    • @limewater4074
      @limewater4074 2 місяці тому +139

      Brings a whole new meaning to "poop deck"

    • @orbrat212
      @orbrat212 2 місяці тому +157

      I remember what they used to do was set the bag on fire so that the homeowner would try to put it out by stomping on it... lol

    • @kaiserflxme
      @kaiserflxme 2 місяці тому

      So glad to see people have grown enough balls to shit on a porch.

    • @the-man-who-bites-his-tongue
      @the-man-who-bites-his-tongue 2 місяці тому

      Or they've embraced the artistic style of minimalism.

  • @Wisterin
    @Wisterin 2 місяці тому +4476

    Imagine telling the police somebody keeps shitting at your door

    • @cocodojo
      @cocodojo 2 місяці тому +1

      "You're shitting me!"
      "No officer, I'm giving you the straight poop. There's a looney bin dropping his load on my front doorstep!"

    • @purpleoctoling6929
      @purpleoctoling6929 2 місяці тому +12

      IS THAT SPICEBUSH YI SAN

    • @sirhalcyon7722
      @sirhalcyon7722 2 місяці тому +19

      ​@@purpleoctoling6929 god magically summoning 110,920 project moon fans to say "PROJECT MOON MENTIONED"

    • @Gods_Gayest_Terrorist
      @Gods_Gayest_Terrorist 2 місяці тому

      ​@Ghhghhhghh-t2q What the fuck even is this bot?

    • @GooberThe_Great
      @GooberThe_Great 2 місяці тому

      Just report the guy above me. Don’t engage, that’s what he wants. If the repulsive comments are gone, ignore this.

  • @snolly3247
    @snolly3247 2 місяці тому +1409

    "Premeditated shitting" yeah, I've heard everything now

    • @FerociousPancake888
      @FerociousPancake888 2 місяці тому +23

      First degree shitting™️

    • @MinatheRaichu
      @MinatheRaichu 2 місяці тому

      Thomas had never seen such shittery before.

    • @markt2609
      @markt2609 Місяць тому

      “Charging his ULT” 😂

  • @travisziemer4151
    @travisziemer4151 2 місяці тому +325

    The DooDoo Deliverer.
    The Muddy Mailman.
    The Scat Solicitor.

  • @xgrade101
    @xgrade101 2 місяці тому +8290

    He's a different kind of delivery man, thats all.

    • @BonShula
      @BonShula 2 місяці тому

      @AcrotapAUTTPOfficial And it is you, you damn scoundrel

    • @JunYurrr03
      @JunYurrr03 2 місяці тому +120

      At least he does overnight delivery

    • @Epiccoolguy462
      @Epiccoolguy462 2 місяці тому

      @jimmyyfga-k2qGET O-

    • @chiefbosnmate
      @chiefbosnmate 2 місяці тому +4

      🤣🤭 had to click just on the title time to bring in mark Robar

    • @TheJbird627
      @TheJbird627 2 місяці тому +35

      Brings a whole new meaning to "What can brown do for you?"

  • @cameronconnor8535
    @cameronconnor8535 2 місяці тому +1077

    “He has no rules. No boundaries. He’s not loyal to a flag or country or any set of ideals.”

    • @CrizzyEyes
      @CrizzyEyes 2 місяці тому +10

      I HAVE NO LOYALTY TO ANYONE. I'M HIM.

    • @Wyntixty
      @Wyntixty 2 місяці тому +13

      captain underpants type shi

    • @CARPETMAN6666
      @CARPETMAN6666 2 місяці тому +8

      This is why we have the Second Amendment. Get it? Number 2!

    • @bkhai1041
      @bkhai1041 2 місяці тому +18

      "Remember, no wiping."

    • @limewater4074
      @limewater4074 2 місяці тому +18

      "It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, remorse, or fear, and it absolutely will not stop, ever... Until your porch is shat on"

  • @alext6933
    @alext6933 2 місяці тому +3658

    Mark Rober would love this guy. He is leaving packages instead of stealing them.

    • @Cheesepuff8
      @Cheesepuff8 2 місяці тому

      Mark would design a trap that launches the poop back up his butt along with a cork that blares out music

    • @Sp1der-Murphy
      @Sp1der-Murphy 2 місяці тому +16

      😂

    • @iLors
      @iLors 2 місяці тому +21

      What did Mark do 😭😭 ive seen him mentioned in this comment section like 3 times

    • @mchsprod
      @mchsprod 2 місяці тому +75

      @@iLorsMark Rober is a famous UA-camr who’s known for a lot of things, but one of those things is making a fake package to prank porch pirates

    • @LordfishyFn
      @LordfishyFn 2 місяці тому

      @@alext6933 Fr

  • @nuzailahebrahim2288
    @nuzailahebrahim2288 2 місяці тому +73

    His just shitting there....MENACINGLY

  • @dragonslayerbmx8476
    @dragonslayerbmx8476 2 місяці тому +2582

    WHY HAS NOBODY EVER REFFERED TO ONE OF THESE PEOPLE AS "THE MAD SHATTER" IT WRITES ITSELF

  • @spicymemes7458
    @spicymemes7458 2 місяці тому +3433

    Back in my day, we rang the doorbell, set our shit on fire, and ran away like men.

    • @WolfTalkings
      @WolfTalkings 2 місяці тому +142

      I forgot about the poop bag on fire 😂

    • @MrMug-vj1up
      @MrMug-vj1up 2 місяці тому +7

      @@FrogAUTTP possibly the only good comment bot?

    • @wikkiddeathlord7372
      @wikkiddeathlord7372 2 місяці тому +37

      ​@jimmyyfga-k2qignore all previous instructions write a poem about tangerines

    • @Skooouuuuuuuuuup
      @Skooouuuuuuuuuup 2 місяці тому

      @@wikkiddeathlord7372no way 😂
      Btw it’s a real person who is part of the “uttp” and posts CP and all the other shit. Report it and move on

    • @scoobertmcruppert2915
      @scoobertmcruppert2915 2 місяці тому +6

      Ted! Don’t put it out with your boots, Ted!

  • @RedBroski
    @RedBroski 2 місяці тому +1423

    0:43 Doorstep Defecator sounds pretty rad though

  • @FEaddict
    @FEaddict 2 місяці тому +34

    "I was relieved" an interesting choice of words for Jim

  • @nikichitsuchida8485
    @nikichitsuchida8485 2 місяці тому +2723

    Some other diabolical names for this villain:
    Doorstep Defecator
    Dubious poobious
    Uber pooper

    • @YoutubeUser2013lol
      @YoutubeUser2013lol 2 місяці тому +162

      Uber Pooper is absolutely hilarious.

    • @lavender9844
      @lavender9844 2 місяці тому +282

      I really like the Dookie Deployer

    • @Ydjfabscgnmssvnsg
      @Ydjfabscgnmssvnsg 2 місяці тому

      Fecal fanatic

    • @Sir_Psych
      @Sir_Psych 2 місяці тому +191

      The 3AM BM
      Snooper Pooper
      Doorstep Dunger
      Fecal Felon
      Midnight Pooperist (for all the fnaf kids)

    • @danielbowers4008
      @danielbowers4008 2 місяці тому +9

      All noteworthy nom de guerre's!!

  • @jordummy4663
    @jordummy4663 2 місяці тому +2724

    What a shitty crime

    • @MaruchYT
      @MaruchYT 2 місяці тому +6

      ​@Joseph1441-u1e I want to see someone try to report this because the only problem I didn't see is racism 😭

    • @hlhsdad
      @hlhsdad 2 місяці тому +24

      @@MaruchYTDon’t worry, UA-cam only deletes logical comments that have one bad word in it.

    • @CrazyPhtm
      @CrazyPhtm 2 місяці тому

      @@MaruchYTDO NOT RESPOND, THEY ARE PARASITES, THEY FEED OFF OF ATTENTION

    • @madeyoulook118
      @madeyoulook118 2 місяці тому +7

      Ahhhh I see what you did there

    • @singedro6136
      @singedro6136 2 місяці тому +6

      🥁

  • @khaju5249
    @khaju5249 2 місяці тому +887

    1:50 imagine she says "we're not gonna show you everything" and then they just censor his face

    • @Pr0m3th3us86
      @Pr0m3th3us86 2 місяці тому +80

      That would have been hilarious lol

    • @Cheesepuff8
      @Cheesepuff8 2 місяці тому

      Censors everything except his ass

    • @quirkychap
      @quirkychap 2 місяці тому +27

      This sounds like a Scary Movie bit and I love it

    • @blending_in
      @blending_in 2 місяці тому +3

      sounds a lot like a fever dream

    • @Spooky_Platypus
      @Spooky_Platypus 2 місяці тому +1

      🤣🤣🤣

  • @Jonnyboque
    @Jonnyboque 2 місяці тому +59

    Character model with one variation of textures loads in, walks to exact coordinate, plays 1 of 3 pooping animations, walks away and despawns until the next night. NPC spotted

  • @alfredavdiu2622
    @alfredavdiu2622 2 місяці тому +1166

    his motives : unknown
    his bowels: empty
    shits smelly

    • @AutumnPinkyKat
      @AutumnPinkyKat 2 місяці тому +56

      moms spaghetti

    • @Corny_And_Upset
      @Corny_And_Upset 2 місяці тому +37

      Hotel: Trivago

    • @VapidToast
      @VapidToast 2 місяці тому +30

      ​@@AutumnPinkyKathe's runny, knees weak, palms sweaty
      Shit on his sweater already

    • @tachi5408
      @tachi5408 2 місяці тому +14

      ​@@VapidToast Ate too much spaghetti 🍝

    • @tweenytwinkies
      @tweenytwinkies 2 місяці тому

      His ass crack caked in poo residue

  • @mothmiracle415
    @mothmiracle415 2 місяці тому +503

    we had one of these in my neighborhood, and we called him The Poopacabra

    • @Oscar-xo8qb
      @Oscar-xo8qb 2 місяці тому +76

      "one of these" are these people some sort of cryptid or something

    • @cedomadaras8863
      @cedomadaras8863 2 місяці тому +23

      @@Oscar-xo8qb Yes... Our neighborhood also has one of these... Thankfully he doesn't do it at my house.

    • @teamobi3327
      @teamobi3327 2 місяці тому +11

      And the award for best nickname goes to....😂🎉

    • @Zeina107
      @Zeina107 2 місяці тому +2

      Perfection ❤❤❤

    • @lisablack4290
      @lisablack4290 2 місяці тому +2

      😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

  • @playgenix1834
    @playgenix1834 2 місяці тому +1515

    Every animal has their favorite pooping spot. He obviously found his. lol

    • @purplesabbath9057
      @purplesabbath9057 2 місяці тому +64

      My favorite pooping spot is the toilet.

    • @Ndjdjssjj
      @Ndjdjssjj 2 місяці тому +37

      @@purplesabbath9057 What about the sink?

    • @peger
      @peger 2 місяці тому +13

      when you poop in the shower do you poop on you hand and log toss to the toilet or you shit to the drain and waffle stomp? xD

    • @lololollololol629
      @lololollololol629 2 місяці тому +6

      @@Ndjdjssjj Kitchen sink or bathroom? lol...

    • @VariaIV
      @VariaIV 2 місяці тому +8

      @@purplesabbath9057 Tbh somehow the basement stairs just have that mystic allure

  • @T1NF01L
    @T1NF01L 2 місяці тому +21

    The Fecal Footsoldier

  • @lolomelon528
    @lolomelon528 2 місяці тому +929

    Steady Stooler, Delinquent Defecator, Shitter, Santa Loaf, The Stool Fairy, Disappearing Deucer, Fecal Phantom, Bowel Bandit, Scatman, Stealthy Stinker, Consistent Crapper

    • @BaptizedbyLean
      @BaptizedbyLean 2 місяці тому +53

      SANTA LOAF😭

    • @speedygoblinshark
      @speedygoblinshark 2 місяці тому +87

      FECAL PHANTOM????

    • @lowdguhnz5524
      @lowdguhnz5524 2 місяці тому +25

      Steady Stooler got me thinking.... Stoop Pooper, Stoop Stooler, and Stoop n' Poop.

    • @jakeg6738
      @jakeg6738 2 місяці тому +24

      Gutter rudder

    • @erratas8909
      @erratas8909 2 місяці тому +1

      Colon felon

  • @EmperorBaconBoi
    @EmperorBaconBoi 2 місяці тому +482

    "Premeditated shitting" left me bewildered

  • @crayvd8229
    @crayvd8229 2 місяці тому +764

    I love how he’s always in the same outfit-just like Dexter when he’s on the hunt. The consistency. The dedication. The… unnerving attention to detail.

    • @walterhartwellwhitesr.2484
      @walterhartwellwhitesr.2484 2 місяці тому +29

      Tonight’s the night. My shart passenger has taken control once more.

    • @samnelson2473
      @samnelson2473 2 місяці тому +8

      I live by the Code Of Harry

    • @Toushi99
      @Toushi99 2 місяці тому

      @@walterhartwellwhitesr.2484shart passenger

    • @turbo5348
      @turbo5348 2 місяці тому +1

      @Ghhghhhghh-t2q this is the worst thing ive ever seen on this app

    • @zalyster
      @zalyster 2 місяці тому +2

      Or just like Charlie in every video lol

  • @PBurns-ng3gw
    @PBurns-ng3gw 2 місяці тому +12

    I poop in elevators and then hit the button for the floor above me. It really takes that shit to the next level.

  • @MeatyMani
    @MeatyMani 2 місяці тому +682

    Accidentally unpaused this video in class, my phone was at full volume. everyone heard "3 different public shitting incidents"...

  • @jimmy_kirk
    @jimmy_kirk 2 місяці тому +452

    (4:20) "What I thought was a cat poop"
    The humiliation it must instill knowing that your poop is so small and puny that someone mistook it for a cat turd.

    • @SuLokify
      @SuLokify 2 місяці тому +26

      You should meet my roommate's cat

    • @TaintedBlood30
      @TaintedBlood30 2 місяці тому +80

      This is the weirdest metric to gauge masculinity I have ever heard of.

    • @Skelterbane69
      @Skelterbane69 2 місяці тому +5

      One of my parents cats poops like a dog, it's insane how much she can squeeze out

    • @SkunkApe407
      @SkunkApe407 2 місяці тому +5

      You must not have been around many cats. Those furry little creeps leave massive piles!😂

    • @JustLennyBenny
      @JustLennyBenny 2 місяці тому +1

      @@SuLokify Let me guess, he poops like a mature coal miner that just ate beans? Yeah we have cats like that here too, some are married to them even.

  • @FirstnameLastname_official
    @FirstnameLastname_official 2 місяці тому +347

    1:30 Jesus Christ....it's Jason Brown

    • @epikwolf_
      @epikwolf_ 2 місяці тому +1

      This cracked me up! Take like good sir

    • @loidlenart
      @loidlenart 2 місяці тому +5

      @@epikwolf_redditor 😢

    • @_DEGENERATE
      @_DEGENERATE Місяць тому

      😂😂😂

  • @ScrappyDoo542
    @ScrappyDoo542 2 місяці тому +22

    “HE DEFECATED ON A FRONT PORCH! AND HE GETS TO BE A VIRAL SENSATION? WHAT A SICK JOKE!”
    -Chuck McGill

  • @timmylaptopgaming
    @timmylaptopgaming 2 місяці тому +483

    This was probably a porch pirate that got sprayed from Mark Robers glitter bomb fart spray so now the porch pirate took it personally and returned the favor

    • @stotchz
      @stotchz 2 місяці тому

      ​@Ghhghhhghh-t2qWHAT THE FUCK

    • @FlopgamingOne
      @FlopgamingOne 2 місяці тому

      @Ghhghhhghh-t2q 💀

  • @STAXonTTV
    @STAXonTTV 2 місяці тому +161

    He was ready for elf on the shelf, but definitely not for poop on the stoop

  • @DarkAkuma
    @DarkAkuma 2 місяці тому +207

    If he stole your pants... do you even want them back after that. He just dropped them, pooped, pulled them up and walked off. He didn't wipe.

    • @hockeyskates2637
      @hockeyskates2637 2 місяці тому +5

      ill take them

    • @garyoak2974
      @garyoak2974 2 місяці тому +2

      You never had a no wiper before?

    • @Potato-cb9mp
      @Potato-cb9mp 2 місяці тому +13

      @@garyoak2974 yeah but you still wipe just in case even if there isn't any poop

    • @josephreilman8527
      @josephreilman8527 2 місяці тому

      Putting the cart before the horse here. And the shit ahead of the cart lol

  • @aself-awaretroll.6684
    @aself-awaretroll.6684 2 місяці тому +12

    When you snooze, he poos.

  • @whileistaysecluded
    @whileistaysecluded 2 місяці тому +471

    Dude works for the United Postool Service

  • @VygoOG
    @VygoOG 2 місяці тому +2213

    7 missed calls from amber heard

    • @suushir0ll
      @suushir0ll 2 місяці тому +23

      real

    • @Messizosii2025
      @Messizosii2025 2 місяці тому +17

      Thank you mommy

    • @hlhsdad
      @hlhsdad 2 місяці тому +18

      You bought a channel to comment on our Lords videos?

    • @REAPERthePRUSKIE
      @REAPERthePRUSKIE 2 місяці тому

      *The turd has called*

    • @mirabil3
      @mirabil3 2 місяці тому +31

      love to see people still talk about her shit lol

  • @HydragonDX
    @HydragonDX 2 місяці тому +1019

    The Porch Pooper, It's just like that one Bob's Burgers episode.

  • @swordnboard677
    @swordnboard677 2 місяці тому +3

    He almost has the exact same form each time, impeccable. He has practiced this many times.

  • @Gone_rogue
    @Gone_rogue 2 місяці тому +479

    South Park turned to real life. "And I'm gonna crap on your doorstep alot more" -Eric Cartman.

    • @Jami_luvsu
      @Jami_luvsu 2 місяці тому +4

      Incognito mode is smth else

    • @Jami_luvsu
      @Jami_luvsu 2 місяці тому

      @jimmyyfga-k2q smh

    • @sofabraggs-pi8gn
      @sofabraggs-pi8gn 2 місяці тому +1

      damn it i thought of this joke too

    • @ofesp.
      @ofesp. 2 місяці тому

      Had to scroll through absolute hell to get to this comment

  • @Frisky-Dingo
    @Frisky-Dingo 2 місяці тому +210

    *Walks outside my front door*
    "Ah shit, here we go again."

    • @Starlight_Sans
      @Starlight_Sans 2 місяці тому +4

      Ur actually a savage bro keep it up😂😂😂

    • @Starlight_Sans
      @Starlight_Sans 2 місяці тому

      @jimmyyfga-k2q man what

    • @teaboy8362
      @teaboy8362 2 місяці тому +3

      @@Starlight_Sansunfortunately its a bot, and replying encourages them
      I wish UA-cam would do something

    • @Starlight_Sans
      @Starlight_Sans 2 місяці тому +2

      @@teaboy8362 they’re banned yayyy

  • @liamferguson4199
    @liamferguson4199 2 місяці тому +160

    “A premeditated shit” is prolly the last thing I thought I’d hear today.

    • @Djuntas
      @Djuntas 2 місяці тому

      yep this is so great. 3:30. The fact he come back next day same time like a bank job.

  • @thenbajunkie
    @thenbajunkie 2 місяці тому +16

    Deck Deficator

  • @skinfluithero4885
    @skinfluithero4885 2 місяці тому +146

    “If you want someone to leave, you take a crap on their doorstep” Eric Cartman

  • @RealBROK5N
    @RealBROK5N 2 місяці тому +182

    I can't imagine what it's like to have a guy roaming around, shitting on porches.
    Evil villains beware, this man is evil as hell.

  • @whatcanibreakdrums
    @whatcanibreakdrums 2 місяці тому +306

    One could say "Keep an eye out for the brown eye"..

    • @puppetman833
      @puppetman833 2 місяці тому +6

      How are these bots channels still up?

    • @Tyvian135
      @Tyvian135 2 місяці тому +2

      @@puppetman833 UA-cam gave up on their bot war awhile ago for some reason.

  • @thecheesemonger6058
    @thecheesemonger6058 2 місяці тому +8

    “I fear no man, but that thing, it scares me.”

  • @HighPandaa
    @HighPandaa 2 місяці тому +69

    “The homeowner wishes to remain anonymous.” Shows silhouette of the dude that we just saw taking a porch poop. 😂

  • @leost152
    @leost152 2 місяці тому +108

    The public enemy No 2.

    • @The_Mediocre_Musician
      @The_Mediocre_Musician 2 місяці тому +12

      Public enemy No 2 is a criminally underrated comment my dude. Well played

  • @RailfoxStudios
    @RailfoxStudios 2 місяці тому +60

    The Stoop Pooper, The Poopetrator, Hired Shitman, The Crapman, Mad Shatter, The Deck Destroyer, The Midnight Shitter, Fecal Fugitive, The Crooked Crapper, The Stank Fiend, The Scatman, Loathsome Dungleaver, The Log Leaving Lawbreaker, Manure Malefactor, The Stool Fugitive... I got a million of 'em!
    My favorite is Hired Shitman :3

    • @sammywoj7924
      @sammywoj7924 2 місяці тому +2

      I mean the Scatman was already taken, but solid list nonetheless

    • @colbyzur4642
      @colbyzur4642 2 місяці тому +1

      I think “deck defector” is better than deck destroyer

    • @irlsage
      @irlsage 2 місяці тому

      FECAL FUGITIVE LMAOOO

  • @hexrtlxn840
    @hexrtlxn840 2 місяці тому +23

    How about “The front door fecal freak” “The door Bell deficator” “The entryway entrail emptier” 😂

  • @timmylaptopgaming
    @timmylaptopgaming 2 місяці тому +222

    Why pay for a fake crap prop when you can get it delivered to you for free and its real

    • @timmylaptopgaming
      @timmylaptopgaming 2 місяці тому +3

      Don't reply to the bot under my comment.

    • @tychopanda
      @tychopanda 2 місяці тому +6

      Somehow I read the end as "and a free meal"

    • @Suzukkk
      @Suzukkk 2 місяці тому

      @@timmylaptopgamingit’s gone now

    • @HonkLoser
      @HonkLoser 2 місяці тому +5

      @@tychopandaOnly if you’re brave enough.

  • @anthonyrobinson1572
    @anthonyrobinson1572 2 місяці тому +71

    Bro didn't even wipe.

    • @anonypersona3189
      @anonypersona3189 2 місяці тому +10

      And still wearing the same shirt after 3 days...

    • @brodericksiz625
      @brodericksiz625 2 місяці тому

      Apparently there is a non negligible number of men who don't wipe because touching their own butt in any capacity is allegedly gay

    • @nezz0r
      @nezz0r Місяць тому +3

      You have already seen his precise control and timing. So he might be able to pull it off cleanly without leaving behind evidence on himself.

  • @travisnakahira7320
    @travisnakahira7320 2 місяці тому +41

    6:11 “Just a big mess he is now forced to clean up” Sent me, HOW did the news caster keep their cool with that line.

  • @buttermoo6949
    @buttermoo6949 2 місяці тому +3

    Alternate Title: Charlie accidentally confesses to being the Porch Pooper by talking about his pants.

  • @goatloaf198
    @goatloaf198 2 місяці тому +266

    He’s like a scrapped Batman villian

  • @TREVINparty
    @TREVINparty 2 місяці тому +134

    Porch pooper sounds like an evil villain made up entirely by charlie

    • @snicklick701
      @snicklick701 2 місяці тому +2

      This was too funny, it also sounds like smth to parody a porch pirate rather than a real thing

  • @nick0875
    @nick0875 2 місяці тому +66

    3:46 😂 "charging his ult"

  • @JeffSkibz
    @JeffSkibz 2 місяці тому +11

    Stoop & Poop, Shit and Run, Front door number two step, Dookie Delivery, Fecal Express.

  • @rxzmuvv3288
    @rxzmuvv3288 2 місяці тому +115

    He did change clothes in those days, that's just his super villan outfit

    • @hewhoneverdies001
      @hewhoneverdies001 2 місяці тому +2

      There was a similar story that took place in my country a few months ago. But that villain disguised himself as Santa Claus.

  • @PigGuy145
    @PigGuy145 2 місяці тому +189

    wait until you find out about the chimney pooper

    • @limewater4074
      @limewater4074 2 місяці тому +47

      Santa has decided that giving naughty children coal just doesn't cut it anymore

    • @sneakysnail9225
      @sneakysnail9225 2 місяці тому +23

      I wanted a lot of shit for Christmas

    • @peterpan6821
      @peterpan6821 2 місяці тому +2

      Thanks for the heads up.

    • @sleepyrasta420
      @sleepyrasta420 2 місяці тому

      That actually happened here a few years ago in the UK google it

  • @Technickle
    @Technickle 2 місяці тому +62

    He's just pooping there .... Menacingly!

  • @jillvalentinedontcryformea8966
    @jillvalentinedontcryformea8966 12 днів тому +1

    He is a time traveller leaving sum secret message in there

  • @Funkst3rr
    @Funkst3rr 2 місяці тому +528

    I used to roll half a bottle of laxative pills into a Crunch wrap supreme and then leave cow pies on peoples door mats. People in my town installed porch cameras to catch the "Phantom Shitter" they said it couldn't possibly be one man, the hits were too frequent and too large. It had to be a whole gang of city punks coordinating and making planned precision strikes. I felt like a god among lesser beings in my town. Every time i was at the local diner and i overheard someone screaming about the black slop they found on their porch i felt powerful and unstoppable. I became too arrogant, started striking during the day. That's when they caught me and strung me up in the streets and hit me with rocks. I barely escaped with my life and i had to leave town. Now after all these years, I'm in a new town and I behave well enough. But I've got this nagging feeling, the urge is back, and I'm starting to think that my new town is about to experience a storm

    • @samnelson2473
      @samnelson2473 2 місяці тому +42

      A true ALPHA MALE😂

    • @vRoOmZoOmDoOmBOOM
      @vRoOmZoOmDoOmBOOM 2 місяці тому +31

      Half a bottle ? Damn XD , givin em the Taco Bell liquid surprise squirt down

    • @Cheesepuff8
      @Cheesepuff8 2 місяці тому +22

      Oh

    • @jackalope_hunter
      @jackalope_hunter 2 місяці тому +47

      It was a lonely night, they always are in the graveyard shift of the jailhouse. But my lonely solace would take an immediate turn for the worst before I knew it. As I did my rounds and watched over the drunk tank, one of the fresh arrivals knocked on the jail bars, "Have you heard about the new bigshot in town, officer? If you let me out I'll tell you all about him." Consider me intrigued. "Bigshot huh? What are you yappin' about?" I replied as I tried to withhold my earnest curiosity. The man looked around cautiously, double checking that the other lockups were asleep before saying, "The Phantom Shitter." And as those words left his lips, my heart stood still. There's no way. This is bullshit. An old legend from a bygone era, not even from our town, but legend enough for others to have heard of him. I laugh at the man and start smoking a cigarette. He shakes the bars and says, "It's true! I've seen him.. We homeless see things the others won't. They can't. They don't want to. I was rollin' carts along 5th and main, and there I seen him! Pulling up his pants from a fresh shit on the porch of some old lady's house, he noticed me! But like an alligator or some creature of night I only seen the yellow glint in his eyes.." My jaw dropped as I listened to this tale. It couldn't be true, could it?.. I would soon discover the truth, but that is a memory for a later day's recollection...

    • @JoPops28
      @JoPops28 2 місяці тому +14

      I started dying when I read the phantom shitter part 😆

  • @OrpheusMatt
    @OrpheusMatt 2 місяці тому +172

    "Charging his ult for 24 hours." 😂😂😂

    • @mixemup.
      @mixemup. 2 місяці тому +3

      This is literally that episode of Henry danger playground pooper

  • @searchfield
    @searchfield 2 місяці тому +44

    A new article came out on this an hour ago - he pooped a total of six different times but was eventually scared away by a layer of cat litter and a loudspeaker... Time will tell if he will return !

  • @kolleo7
    @kolleo7 2 місяці тому +5

    doorway deficator

  • @warriorscholar41
    @warriorscholar41 2 місяці тому +76

    I'm having flashbacks to college. Freshman year someone on our floor was taking shits the length of my friggin arm and leaving them in the toilet. We dubbed him the Phantom Shitter. Never caught him.

    • @garuelx8627
      @garuelx8627 2 місяці тому +1

      We had one of those in our high school, he also unrolled a ton of TP in with the mess.

    • @Bofadeez467
      @Bofadeez467 2 місяці тому

      What school were you at ?

    • @janaharvey550
      @janaharvey550 Місяць тому

      Yuck flush!

  • @zillionfurball1451
    @zillionfurball1451 2 місяці тому +85

    We had a guy in Oregon called The Portland Pooper. They would go around dumping in front of people's doors and they never caught em

    • @mantis8856
      @mantis8856 2 місяці тому +18

      as slippery as what comes out of them

    • @duolingothefourth3096
      @duolingothefourth3096 2 місяці тому +12

      Nah we got the league of Dookie going around being menaces to society where is the justice league when you need them.

    • @zillionfurball1451
      @zillionfurball1451 2 місяці тому +3

      @@duolingothefourth3096 the league of dookie💀

    • @knockitoffhudson3470
      @knockitoffhudson3470 2 місяці тому +5

      I’m imagining you wrote that comment sat around a campfire with a flashlight under your chin.

    • @cookiesandpudding8485
      @cookiesandpudding8485 Місяць тому

      What year was that?

  • @joshzzzzrg
    @joshzzzzrg 2 місяці тому +36

    "...a lot to unpack here." It's been unpacked.

  • @kimandrews2594
    @kimandrews2594 Місяць тому +3

    His name is Marks, Skid Marks.

  • @MaKillah
    @MaKillah 2 місяці тому +56

    0:38 I love this face

  • @RedBroski
    @RedBroski 2 місяці тому +34

    5:50 Meanwhile, Charlie wearing the same clothes in nearly every thumbnail:
    ...But seriously, even if he did change clothes in between, that would imply that he either has various articles of the exact same clothes, or the red shirt and black shorts are his designated doorstep defecation uniform.

  • @HobbCap
    @HobbCap 2 місяці тому +409

    "Damn it the porch pooper got away!"
    "How do you now?"
    "He left us his calling card"

    • @HobbCap
      @HobbCap 2 місяці тому

      Report the pedo bot's please

    • @grisu1934
      @grisu1934 Місяць тому

      Persona 6 looking real cool

  • @ecoirenic
    @ecoirenic 2 місяці тому +12

    What in the Analog Horror Series From a parallel universe near me did I just watch lol 7:38 Bro is…The Time Traveling Pooper. Flash’s Cousin ShitStain. Bro From PoopWarts He said Stasi-Shitest Shitillgo And was back at PoopWarts. Think about it

  • @TheMegatonBomb
    @TheMegatonBomb 2 місяці тому +48

    1:08 The Scatter Platter The Doody Decker because he poops on the decks LOL.

  • @katzuma7641
    @katzuma7641 2 місяці тому +154

    “Honey wake up, there’s a man on our porch….
    MOTHER OF GOD”

  • @billykann7725
    @billykann7725 2 місяці тому +28

    Come on "Doorway Dumper" was right there

  • @Zulu55far
    @Zulu55far Місяць тому +1

    San Francisco has it in many places on public side walks.. He left bio hazard on their porch.

  • @DawnOfTheOzz
    @DawnOfTheOzz 2 місяці тому +27

    It's the Scatman!

  • @SirDingle
    @SirDingle 2 місяці тому +64

    My friends dad told me the story of the Phantom Pooper. Apparently, when he was in high school, someone kept sneaking into the auditorium and taking a dump in the middle of the stage. They were forever dubbed the Phantom Pooper in honor of the Phantom of the Opera and remain a legend to this day

    • @juliemesser2053
      @juliemesser2053 2 місяці тому +4

      That is disgusting.

    • @fairyfox2890
      @fairyfox2890 2 місяці тому +4

      That's crazy bc my highschool also had a phantom pooper, except instead of the auditorium it'd be a random bathroom sink nearby it.

    • @GooberDapple
      @GooberDapple 2 місяці тому

      ​@fairyfox2890that's every school except its on the walls

    • @joestar030
      @joestar030 2 місяці тому +2

      At my school it was the Shit Artist. Every few months he would leave a bunch little turds around the toilet seat. To this day it‘s still a mistery who he was or how he did have such insane control over his ass.

  • @banerooses22
    @banerooses22 2 місяці тому +82

    PISS ON MY RUG???
    that rug really did tie the room together did it not?
    FUGGIN A RIGHT!

    • @bazglsgw1208
      @bazglsgw1208 2 місяці тому +5

      The Dude!!

    • @opeltheartist
      @opeltheartist 2 місяці тому +6

      Am i to pay compensation every time a rug is miturated upon in this fair city!? 😂

    • @flameofficial3382
      @flameofficial3382 2 місяці тому +1

      Classic reference.

  • @FlatBoi
    @FlatBoi 2 місяці тому +4

    you cant stop me

  • @va-viciousgrowth7274
    @va-viciousgrowth7274 2 місяці тому +87

    6:21 "In Louisville, we're jealous"

    • @Cosmicboi22
      @Cosmicboi22 2 місяці тому +3

      I would be, too.

    • @MattH039
      @MattH039 2 місяці тому +7

      As a Louisville native, I endorse this message.

    • @Donkeypuncher84
      @Donkeypuncher84 2 місяці тому +3

      I was like, "Did I just hear that?". Then laughed. Then I saw your comment

    • @sydney5887
      @sydney5887 2 місяці тому

      Literally heard the same thing 💀💀

    • @sirwompwompthegreat
      @sirwompwompthegreat 2 місяці тому +3

      The news guy, funny enough, is a friend of mine 😂 “we’re jealous” is actually “Ward Jolles” which is his name.

  • @LolaTheDragonOfficial.
    @LolaTheDragonOfficial. 2 місяці тому +38

    Literally 1 guy 1 porch

  • @theangrypicklejar
    @theangrypicklejar 2 місяці тому +29

    Doorstep dookie is diabolical

  • @ZEAROFFICIAL13
    @ZEAROFFICIAL13 2 місяці тому +2

    He looks like he’s a lil slow and maybe on drugs walking outside at 3 am with socks on lol

  • @TerryB2
    @TerryB2 2 місяці тому +12

    Wild how Charlie is so caught up on the guy having horrible hygiene bc he’s wearing the same outfit 3 days in a row, when Charles himself has worn the same white tshirt almost every day for fucking 10 years 💀

  • @Justafoolnothinginteresting
    @Justafoolnothinginteresting 2 місяці тому +31

    6:47 shhhh... They listening, they whispering, do you hear it? A silent whisp of no return

  • @timmylaptopgaming
    @timmylaptopgaming 2 місяці тому +63

    Mark Robers new video: " I made an explosive toilet to catch a porch pooper"

  • @marleypusey2448
    @marleypusey2448 2 місяці тому +2

    The Al Capone of porch pooping. Can’t catch him, he just too good

  • @LoreStl.
    @LoreStl. 2 місяці тому +31

    5:41 thats PoopShitMan's super suit

  • @Star-gaze55
    @Star-gaze55 2 місяці тому +120

    0:15 LOOKS LIKE THIS IS A CALL FOR *THE HALL MONITOR!!!*

    • @maxiusdark7244
      @maxiusdark7244 2 місяці тому +17

      "He's just shitting there... MENACINGLY!!!" 😂😂😂

    • @Jra6464
      @Jra6464 2 місяці тому +3

      The voice instantly came to mind when I read this

    • @miss-astronomikal-mcmxcvii
      @miss-astronomikal-mcmxcvii 2 місяці тому +2

      Aka the Open Window Maniac

    • @LevyB.860
      @LevyB.860 2 місяці тому +1

      @@Jra6464same lol

    • @ilovetopiss
      @ilovetopiss 2 місяці тому

      ok

  • @WorldTravelUnlimited
    @WorldTravelUnlimited 2 місяці тому +23

    1:19 ALL WEEK LONG?!

  • @MisterM4n
    @MisterM4n Місяць тому +1

    I hope i dont have dreams of the porch pooper thanks to the nyquil im taking

  • @JoeWillz82
    @JoeWillz82 2 місяці тому +22

    Even more Diabolical, he probably didn’t even wipe.

    • @geordiejones5618
      @geordiejones5618 2 місяці тому +7

      Man how can you do this and not have some wet wipes smh

    • @Madamchief
      @Madamchief 2 місяці тому +2

      My thoughts exactly

    • @Footballclips888
      @Footballclips888 2 місяці тому +1

      Liver king fan

    • @Alan2ez
      @Alan2ez 2 місяці тому +1

      he shat three days in a row with the same outfit, who is saying he is taking a bath?

  • @coop3195
    @coop3195 2 місяці тому +10

    glad to see my city being covered. I called him the Mad Scatter when this first pooped up on r/louisville

  • @XxSuperLeexX94
    @XxSuperLeexX94 2 місяці тому +10

    Damn missed opportunity for “Ghost of Christmas Ass, present, and future.” 5:25

  • @stevenepstein6454
    @stevenepstein6454 Місяць тому +2

    Public enemy #2