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But other races of women like the good decent black men. Black women generally exclusively disregard the best of black men and exclusively prefer the worst of black men. Then they get online gaslighting the world as to why they have these experiences with kinda blackmen that theeeey prefer n choose. Then they'll date a whiteman who would fall in a similar character type of the black men they "arnt attracted to". Bw be on total bullshit.
the music thing is so weird cause all these genres black ppl created, yet its not black to listen to half of them...i think about rock n roll , when rock n roll is slang for black music
Hi my name is Roy and I'm 17 years old I'm like 2 shades darker than you. You could say light brown And I got criticized because my girlfriend is white and for dating outside of my race.
I'm attracted to Black Woman. I'm Black. But I grew up on skater life, pop-punk, boy bands, TRL, Nickelodeon like Kenan and Kel. Now in my 40s, I'm a dork. A square. So Black Women make fun of my music (Third Eye Blind) one even told me this is not my culture. Last night I went on a date with a White Woman who happened to grow up like me. It was magical cause we think the same. But Black Women were giving me dirty looks like i was doing something wrong. They're so goofy.
Do your thing bro. Stay focused and keep prayer. Black men have evolved. We just figured out at All ages, that part of being with a female that vibes with our soul and on the same page as you and is our peace.
Smile and nod. Chuckle a bit. They had no love for you before the white girl. They're mad because they know you won't be a stepdad. Or whatever bottom tier position they place you in. They freely admit it now.
I was a skateboarder and none of us listen to boy bands. That was like the last thing we listened to. I don't know what type of skateboarding you were doing or who you were doing it with.
Typically lightskin people have mixed lineage. The racism in america is by far so stupid because all of us are mixed ethnicities, even white people. Smh
Stick with Latinas, Southeast Asians, Pacific Islanders, Middle Easterners, South Asians, and women overseas. At least those groups give us a pass for being lighter-skinned BM. We still have options even if American BW and WW want to be silly. All you're missing out on is child support (BW), alimony (WW), and sexless marriages.
A childhood friend had his black card revoked at 10 years old because his parents embraced independent and eclectic tastes in their home. Growing up, he dated one Black woman but also dated others who appreciated his unique style. Many black people teased him for "speaking funny" because he used proper English and minimal slang. Fast forward to today, and he still faces subtle slights from black adults. Despite this, his Mexican wife loves him and he’s chosen to raise their children with the same values and upbringing he experienced as a child.
You just described the deep rooted slave mentality of most BP in America. They believe unless you behave, speak, and believe a specific type of way, then you are not "Black". This is a holdover from the plantation where slaves kept each other in line so they all wouldn't get in trouble.
Similarly this was me but even as a D-I wrestler and amateur kickboxer/boxer black women called me corny. I was also a STEM (chemical engineering) major in undegrad and grad school. I married a Russian woman and many in my family called me a sellout despite. I got in where I fit in. My wife is also an engineer (geological) and we make more than enough to have s good life.
Yeah I was called corny. Now that im 39, I get a lot of "Hey big head" messages and stuff. Im very appealing to black women now. I guess they matured and realized that those guys werent a good choice. Now they want a man that isnt in jail all the time and is financially secure because of the hard work he did when he was younger. It went from getting teased for READING to now "Oh I only date men that are educated" lol I would be lying if there wasnt a tad bit of resentment. Like, oh now that you had your fun and gave what most would consider your best years to pookie, now im supposed to come and give you the world? doesnt sit right with me.
Grew up in Brooklyn,1990s. Back then, if you weren't a thug dude or a dude with money, Black girls weren't really willing to give you the time of day. I remeber actually having to "dumb down" my vocabulary just to fit in. Decades later, it's a whole new world with a freedom i couldn't have imagined back then.
MANHATTAN 1980s. GEORGE WESTINGHOUSE H.S. YOU DIDN'T HAVE A KANGOL HAT, SHEEPSKIN COAT, AND RUN/ DMC GEAR, BLACK CHICKS DIDNT GIVE YOU A FIRST LOOK. I ALSO WASNT TRYING TO GO TO RIKERS ISLAND TO TRY TO IMPRESS A CHICK!😁😎😏👌
33 year old black man here. Grew up in the city of Detroit until I was 10 and the reminder of my school years I grew up in the burbs. Whenever I dated black women, there was always a clash. Not from me not understanding the culture, but rather me not limiting my identity to the concept of what’s considered black. I’ve been on literal dates where black women literally told me I look like I date white women. All because I speak proper English. It’s hypocritical because we glorify the worst parts of our culture and yet get mad when other ethnicities categorize us the same. Being a nerd is corny. Speaking proper English is corny, liking anime was corny (until Meg made it “cool” for black women) liking rock music was corny, not wearing Nike outfits with shoes to match was corny, wearing vans was corny,etc; all these dumb rules and yet when black men go some one who accepts them then we’re the sellouts.
Yep 31-year-old here who can also agree with everything you just said. Pretty much doing anything that they don't consider to be in the black diaspora is seen as corny. The word corny in my opinion is corny. If you use the word corny not Ironically in the 2000s people would have laughed at you. Women using that word to describe men as hilarious to me. Because a lot of women are corny
I can relate. Black women arent into. Since i started skydiving, became a pilot, and wing walker, i had black women tell me literally, that I lost my "black card". 😂😂😂😂.
I used to get offended by hearing 'you look/sound like you like white women' when on dates with sistas, but the older I got what I really realized they were saying/projecting is 'non black women would probably be interested in YOU' and that makes some of them uncomfortable.
I am late 30s and when I set up my dating profile on the apps I typically put the fact that I am a nerd and enjoy comics and anime among other things. I am also six feet and ripped which helps. I noticed when I matched with white women they messaged me about the nerdy things I was interested in because they were into it. With black women that matched me they never bring up the stuff i am interested. The feeling I got is all they saw was I was handsome, no kids and had a career. The feeling I got is I wouldn’t be their preference years ago when they were at their peak. Just my anecdotal experience
Bro same! That and Asian women... and put my profile up for only blk when I was looking for them lol They think this stuff is a stereo type but this shit is real!
There are plenty of black women who love anime and are big nerds. An experience on an app shouldn't change your views on the real world. One trip to a coma con in ATL will expose this.
Be careful of Becky. Always have an agenda. They have more power than you in a court of law. Look at what happened to Jonathan Majors. Stay clear of Becky. You've been warned...
I hear you, brother. But the problem is, all the things that were considered "nerdy" or "corny" in the 80s & 90s, are considered MAINSTREAM, now ! Its no longer considered nerdy or corny to like Animé & comic books.
Definitely can relate to this. I was called corny and im now married to a white woman. Not that she was my first choice but she accepted me for me. Been down 20 years now.
Ive never found trouble finding attractive and accepting non stereotypical black women ever. My experience with white women though has been they all have this underlying stereotype in their head about what black people are about. It got annoying really quickly.
Many of those black women would look down on black men with eclectic tastes in music and fashion, only finding value in them when they needed help writing a paper or passing a final exam. I know at least 30 men who chose to go where they were appreciated and have built flourishing families over the past 25 years.
After years of dealing with shallow and materialistic women, he probably took the first one to treat him with some genuine love and respect, regardless of ethnicity. However, the average black woman doesn't appreciate black men with eclectic tastes or interests when they are young and are prone to avoid them. They only take notice when some of these men become successful and it's only because of the lifestyle that they could provide them. For example, take nearly all of the black men in less traditional activities, like IT, skateboarding (Nyjah Huston), swimming, gymnastics, chess, mathematics, physics (see Neil deGrasse Tyson) or any number of less conventional areas of interest. TBH, black women, in general, not exclusively, are simply less likely to accept a man for who he is. They are going to care about social status and how you make them look to their ratchet, superficial friends.
Why are men who are describing themselves as different than average, writing off their entire race because they wasted time dating the average women in their own ethnic group instead of filtering for the ones that are unique in the same ways they are? If you aren't average why waste time seeing if average women will accept you? Why not find the nerdy girls in one's own ethnic group who have no "ratchet, superficial friends" to begin with and go ahead and get on the marriage track with them because that's what pale dudes are doing. Somehow pale dudes are able to find the high quality melanated women yall pretend don't exist and they are marrying them instead.
I left public school in the suburb in 7th grade. Went to all black catholic. They called me white boy for speaking proper. I was a nerd in the hood, but im on hoop squad and football team. Brothers when you go back for 20 yr reunion. The nerds make all the money and are married to the prom queen. Trust me, embrace it.
I think the issue is that heterosexual white guys can fit almost any archetype and still be seen as attractive to most white women (and black women) they can be corporate, they can be chill stoner/hippie types, they can be avant-garde artistic types, atheletes, they can even be nerds (albeit white male nerds had to fight for that one). Where as for black men you have arguably 3 acceptable attractive archetypes: Athlete*, Entertainer*, and Thug. And when it comes to being an athlete you still have to have some swag/edge or you will be labeled as corny like Russell Wilson which is kind of crazy that an NFL QB can be considered corny.
Yea I have been saying this for years, white men don't have just one accepted male architype, whereas black men from the ages of like 10-25 only have one which is pretty much the thug stereotype. This a recent phenomenon like the past 30 years or so, but the single mother epidemic only makes it worse.
I’m also bi-racial black and Spanish. Even though I grew up with my Mom on my black side I always felt more love from every other race but black women. I worked at a top 5 tech company and went to 2 elite colleges. I used to always try to date a black girls during college but I realized quickly they never liked me until I started making money in tech I’m also 5’6 so I understand that black women strongly cares about height 😅
I had the same experience except my mom is Thai and dad is Black. Don't get me started on the height thing with black women...had one even tell me "You'd be fine if you were about a foot taller". Expanded my dating circle to Latinas and Asian women and they seem more accepting.
Once I started surrounding myself around people who accepted & loved me for who I am and walked away from those who rejected me, I started to live a very peaceful, fun-filled life.
Man this rocked me to my core. I'm 54 and have always been a nerd. Played football in high school, joined the military, went to college and was offered to play football for a D-1 program, but am still a nerd. The only Black women checking for me are the baby mommas that want a simp. But I'm holding out that I'll find my soul mate that's a beautiful sister.
@@Coffeetime1991There aren't a lot of nerdy black women and they aren't into nerdy black guys like that or they somehow think they are above nerdy black guys
@@malimal4972 Is this not the same thing being discussed here. The man in the video clearly said he would find one but she was not to his liking beauty wise. We can't tit for tat when it's obvious both groups are experiencing the same things due to overlooking each other.
This happened to me in the 90’s and I went to Europe as a soldier, that opened my eyes to a world full of women who didn’t treat me like a goof because I didn’t act thuggish and spoke solely AAVE. I’m 50 and far from that guy but I felt like DG too.
I’m still somewhat scarred from middle school when I moved from NM to central Texas and enrolled in a predominantly black school when up until that point I attended schools with all types of kids. First time I opened my mouth to read in English class the entire class burst into laughter after this girl next to me yelled “you sound like a white boy”. I kid you not I refused to speak the rest of the school year and that stayed with me for many years after that until I became comfortable with who I am and how I speak and stopped being ashamed of not fitting in. I’m glad that I didn’t succumb to the ignorance of the “community” and took an interest in things not considered “black”. I’m in my 30s now and have only seriously dated one black woman despite being attracted to and trying to pursue several. At a certain point you need to accept things as they are and go where you are appreciated. And that for me seems to be every other race of woman except for my own 🤷🏾♂️
Sounds like you were traumatized by that experience and have this subconscious bias with black women. There are plenty of non stereotypical black women around. You just need to know how to identify them. It’s funny to me that for every black man claiming what you claim there’s an equal amount of black women saying the exact same thing about black men.
@marvymarv959 I’d say you’re right. Our biases tend come from experience be it good or bad. And that’s just one of mine. I have plenty more….And oh I don’t doubt it. We seem to have things quite backwards across the board as a people so I’m sure there are black women with similar stories
@@ratswagger Yes so my question is why aren't the melanated men who describe themselves this way filtering for just the melanated women they have that in common with? Why are they wasting their time trying to get with the kind of women that they know aren't compatible and then writing off their entire ethnic group because of that?
I'm a black man who plays the cello... and I have found plenty of black women who understands me ... yu gotta look in the right places.. If you are only meeting black women in the club then I could see why you would say that.. go to museums, jazz clubs, etc
I’m glad you said this. I think people have 1 or 2 bad experiences or don’t know how to look for the right people and then let the trauma or rejection consume them. I like clubs, museums, Paramore, books, and all that jazz and I’m with an anime-loving gamer who also has diverse tastes
I’ve never fit into a stereotypical racial box, even as a kid, because I just enjoyed what interested me. As a result, I have what some people may call “eclectic tastes and interests”. Musically, I enjoy everything from Coltrane to Grateful Dead to Funkadelic to Talking Heads to Sun Ra to opera. I like Kurosawa’s and Ozu’s films. I like going to Black plays and Black art museum/gallery openings. I’m a voracious reader of fiction, non-fiction, and comic books. Unfortunately, too many sisters thought I acted and talked white so they weren’t interested in me. Or, they thought I was too weird for growing locs when the Jheri curl was in style. But, white, Asian, and Latin women flocked to me. So, I dated who was interested in me. That’s when sisters would give me dirty looks or make comments when they’d see me with these other women but, we both knew, they didn’t want me so I didn’t see what they were upset about. Or, maybe they were projecting their confusion that, if Becky, Megumi, and Maria, liked me maybe there was something there that they were missing out on. And, there are a lot of brothers out there like me. Two of my oldest friends married white women because sisters weren’t interested in them. One friend from college married a Japanese woman. All three of them wanted to date Black women but Black women weren’t interested in them…until they became accomplished in their fields.
Unfortunately most times that BW aren't interested in us, they believe that we should "sit on the shelf", and wait for one of them to give us some attention. BW believe that BM should always be there for them, and if BW don't want you, they don't want no one else to want you either...
I was laughed at, ridiculed, most called me an Oreo most of my life. If you like the series Stanger things, Lucas Sinclair is the first black TV character just like me. Athletic, but loved D&D with my friend, who were white. My wife is white and been married 35 years.
It's all good but look at this way at least the Lord bless you with someone who really knows how to treat you with you deserve specially after all the BS you had dealt with.
All facts. Being called weird, nerd, White boy, etc by the same black women you're supposed to love. Both my daughter's mother and wife still try to "pick" on me. But I've learned that's their own short comings
It's funny I come across this.. cause during the new year party at my cousins..my sisters friend kept making fun of me for dating white girls...when she knows girls like her aren't into black guys like me..ironic
That's odd that having a range of music taste is looked down upon in the black american community seeing as our ethnic group created basically every american music genre
I was at SXSW last year. There was this artist. im so mad i stopped my camera before it happened. but he went on stage to sing R&B and the main promotor of the venue had her mic on and said out loud "Why are 🐱👤 still trying to sing right now" with a heavy sigh. every artist looked at me and said thats crazy. I didnt hear her mic on for the rest of the event. Actually didnt see her after that. the artist continued to perform with passion. i followed him but the dude hasnt posted in a while so i forgot his name.
I'm from the East Coast, but I went to a D-1 school in the midwest. I was an anomaly when I tried to talk to the black women, so I talked to the white ones.
I dont worry about it at 34. People with that mindset are immature. That bein said I have had better dating experiences overall with African women. Is what it is
Its crazy how many of us have nearly identical experiences when it comes to this stuff. I like how he said "recency bias" when it comes to being accepted, thats spot-on. I hear young black men talking about rock music and anime amongst themselves, something I wish I was able to do growing up in the 90's. Apparently its also now acceptable to play video games that arent 2k or Madden lol.
My brother went to Highschool in the early 90s. Listen to Rock music, wore some rock clothing, and was a musician mainly playing guitar. I will just tell you right off black women were not checking for him really.
I did it since the 90s. I did what I wanted. I have just about every jrpg ever made imported games from Japan. I always thought outside of the box. As a result I have a large large video game collection..Worth thousands of dollars easy. I didn't date everyone around me was becoming young parents I was getting good grades and collecting all kinds of video games. I was enjoying being a kid.
I’m from the south. Dated only black women. And have simply not had this experience. I’m not gonna say it doesn’t happen. I’m sure it does. But this stuff constantly gets laid at the feet of black women with no accountability from black men. No grace for preference. No understanding that no one has to be interested in you just because you are interested in them. Be you eclectic, non athletic, or whatever.
Once you get past the insecurity and peer pressure from high school, you will see height, skin tone, tastes in music, etc dont matter AS MUCH in the dating scene. As a 36 year old black man, you eill attract women who are naturally drawn to tou.... regardless of race!
This is 2025 Black Men go where you are happy and feel safe...This whole blaming black women is pointless....GOOOOOOOOO, "YOU'RE FREE" There's no need to explain yourself.
You can't really blame them though. Most women have problems not just the black ones. Let them know they can do what they want. Always could have. It's everyone's right as long as your not doing anything stupid then go for it.
@@stevenrobinson9856Most men have problems too, you are not in women's shoes, but you would see if you were, ask women from across the world and let them tell stories of all the stuff they went through with men. Men should simply choose better, maybe break out of their type, there many ethnicities, nationalities and races to choose from, all those women can't be bad.
@pulanala1421 It's hard to downplay Men/Black men issues considering that y'all do the most throughout history in order to be heard or to prove your manhood... Honestly,Life isn't all about you?🙄 Enjoy your day!
😂 been a “nerd” my whole life and love it. Feels good to be yourself and not a society factory made personality of a human being 😂. I’ll stay single until a good lady recognizes the effort.
All through school I was considered a nerd, even though I was a 2 way starter on the football team. Only mixed and white women have ever liked me. This video definitely rings true
I struck gold…I’m sitting up playing ps5 while she my blk queen (wife) is on sims 4 as i type this she as a blk woman was made fun of by her peers for being deferent not ghetto she likes eclectic music linkin park, billie elish, etc… but was gawked after by men because she is very attractive with a dump truck so she was close to going to white men as i was close to going to white women we’re both 35 i say all this to say don’t give up brothers like what u like but not all blk women are loud, mean, & ghetto etc…good to luck to y’all no matter who y’all end up with✊🏾
Not all black women narrative is dead and gone in the ship had already sailed we're going where we are destined to be not go backwards where we come from that has little to no benefit.
So would you say that the men complaining are choosing to go for a particular type of black woman: ghetto, ratchet? Are the black men ignoring other corny, nerdy black women and preferring Instagram baddies instead and then generalizing to include all black American women as behaving as such?
Yeah I get this all the time and they gasp when I say I've never dated outside my race 😂😂 so i make sure to roast them and assert my dominance in the proceeding relationship. Someone has to humble these broads and I'll gladly do it
I admit I can easily relate to this. I’ve been called corny because of the way I talk, what music I listen to (80s new wave), what I watch on TV instead of going to the clubs, even to Black churches.
I'm white and I started dating a black woman a few years back, and when I went to her church as a visitor/guest one Sunday, I enjoyed it so much because it had an entirely different, more upbeat, vibe than the Southern Baptist church I grew up in. So I joined the new church (it is a small church with about 200 members) and I am literally the only white person in there, which doesn't make any difference to me whatsoever, but my family seemed to be somewhat offended by my decision, and have become more distant as a result. They would never admit that, but I know what's up lol
They didn’t want us and we went with someone that actually wanted to know us. We build families with them and they show us what it’s like to have a partner and copilot for our families.
I can totally relate. My whole childhood, I was made fun of because of my "proper upbringing." Once I stopped giving a damn, my life took a drastic and positive turn.
Black Men...All Men.....We are only products of our environments and the people we grew up around. I encourage you to go to the woman that not only loves you.. ACCEPTS YOU...WANTS NOTHING MORE THAN TO ADAPT TO YOU....MOST IMPORTANTLY.... SHE WOULDN'T WANT TO HAVE YOU ANY OTHER WAY.... SALUTE
As a black man, I completely understand this. This helps me to feel less alone in who I am, and more comfortable being the guy I am. Love is hard when you don’t necessarily tick the box most people expect you to tick.
I'm a nerd, but I'm also 6 ft tall, dark skin and have an athletic body. The thing that helped me was that I'm hip. I love the Lord of the Rings and Star Wars, but I also embrace old school UGK. What I've found out is that BW love hypermasculine BM, but regular brothers are seen as corny. Yet BW will marry corny, regular white guys whenever they date out.
Lots of black women told me i was not black enough...I used to laugh at that: cant be blacker- born and raised Africa, family was is one of the founding families of the country i am from, speak 3 native languages, english and Spanish and the kicker is an ethnic name that people mispronounce all the time. Unless you from the motherland too cant ever call my blackness into question.
I was defintely 100% a nerd. I liked comicbooks, superheroes, drawing and writing. I was made fun of by my older brothers and made fun of in school. I had a lot of anger because of that. I didn't feel "normal". In highschool, Black girls were certainly not thinking about me. In college, the first girl to ever be interested in me was white. I never dated a white girl and always knew I wanted to marry a Black girl. I finally did find one who was right for me, but I totally understand the struggle of being dismissed for who you are. Today, I make six figures and I just bought a nice big house. The folks who called me nerdy are mostly still in the same small town and not doing much.
I'm a little older than the gentleman in the vid, grew up in Chicago wild 100s. I was the kind of the nerdy oreo guy growing up. I never had problems with black women per se. My issues were more so having to go to dangerous neighborhoods and be put in life threatening situations just to be out and about with one of these women. I'm pushing 40 and I don't go to any black areas anymore. Idc who the women is. Plus these new niggas are different. In my day, you could talk your way out of stuff or even fight back and those guys would respect you, and leave you alone.
I don’t know where you guys are meeting these black women who don’t date “corny/square” black dudes. I’m from Boston, grew up listening to nu-metal, watches anime, into comics…etc. I have NO TROUBLE pulling black girls. My girlfriend(black and beautiful) likes the fact that I listen to rock, goes disc golfing, and into all kinds of nerd shit. What are you guys doing???
Fr shii take it from me for i be listening to wierd underground msuic like $uicideboys, xxxtentacion, city mourgue, scarlxrd, and street/drill rappers like 21 savage, chief keef, king von, amd most recently kau flock and i still be pulling women and blasting that shit in the whip which aye some girls fw it others dont which then i just put on my alt/indie playlist
I never met a black person from Boston but I would imagine the selection there is quite different than in other cities just based on all the ivy league schools in that area.
That’s the key word:,Boston. You are up north. The first point is referring from perspective of the south. This was like this for me growing up especially since our numbers were lower.
It fr be like that but tbh i couldn't care less for if we aint vibing nor have a mutual likeness on knowing each other and spending time together then why would i waste my time/energy on you when i could spend my time wit a girl who's actually intrested/accepts me for who i am and what i like doing?
Do my Brothas date and marry White Women because they are attracted to them or because women of other races won't? Just curious. Growing up on the West Side of Chicago in the 80s and 90s, no one ever talked about getting with a white woman romantically. I'm a fat and nerdy looking, considered lame to some i assume has been married twice to black women. Still with my second wife. There are a plethora of black women who dated guys and have multiple baby fathers that didn't marry them for some reason. Yet, these black dudes say black women shunned them so the dated outside their race just like that? Hard to believe kid.
I would say a little bit of both, they are attracted to wht wmn but blk wmn want to wait at the finish line with the rest of the wmn. You take politics out of the mating game most men will deal with any wmn regardless of tribe, men are designed for variety.
I have never thought I had to marry a woman who looks like me culture wise. I was never trapped in the racial box of dating. I dated who I liked at that particular time.
Remeber in middle school (HS now) not long ago, even when my dating life then was not good, I still made the comment, and ofc, the black girls, and even one of them black teachers (female) were saying | hated myslef or "what about your mom”. Mind you, they were bullying the crap out of me. At that time I was lost, and desperately looking for a connection ( still am) , and they were the same demographic who was making me feel less. So that shifted my way of perceiving people, people say that it’s not good, but to me it’s normal, if a certain group of girls ( your own) don’t like you, you gonna go in search of love somewhere else. Currently I’m still working on my appearance, social skills, confidence, (growing out my hair again) etc, and over all fixing myself and to become more attractive, while working on my long term goals.
Definitely facts here I’ve been with a few black women and they all made fun of my anime and video game related hobbies. Other ethical groups never cared at all but black women loved to call me lame or a dork.
Wife, family and friends was bugging out every time I pull up bumping Aerosmith, The Beatles, Zombie, CCR, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Johnny cash…etc…had to change the song before I hit the block…
I fit the criterea as well. I grew up in South FL in the 90s/00s, open to dating within my race because its the social construct. Ive only dated one black girl, and she was biracial. Throuougt HS, no black girls showed interest. Once i moved to an entirely different area, i was exposed to white, Hispanic, native American, Indiana asian women. Man once i started dating my ex fiance, i was called alot lol. So many black girls openly knowing i was dating her in school, and still tried to get with me. Mind you, i was just like Childish Gambino. Shes Puerto Rican, we have 2 kids.
Most black men feel pressured to say the dont like white women by the community.....however thats what is said in public in private its a different story
I walked in those trenches, for sure. If you didn’t conform you got ostracized by both communities. So I owe NOTHING to those who did nothing for me but give me grief. Now that I am successful, I have no responsibility to women who often went out of their way to let me know they weren’t interested in me when I was on my way up. Go where you are celebrated, not merely tolerated…and never where you are looking to be taken advantage of….
Exactly 💯..... The major reason I started dating outside of my race is because I'm seen as too goofy, corny or too white because of my taste in entertainment and my general lifestyle by black women. This was very difficult for me growing up because black women are naturally my number one physical preference. If you don't have that gangster badman aggression edginess regardless of whether or not you are conventionally attractive black women for the most part just are not attracted to you
I'm Puerto Rican, but look like a mixed black dude. It is what it is. Love Heavy Metal, horror movies, comic books, etc. way before that stuff was hip/cool. So, the 90s were ROUGH lol. I went to a high school in the Bronx that was almost entirely black/Hispanic(about 60/40). Forget dating lol. I was pretty much persona non grata. And they would let you know. To your face. Luckily I developed a thick skin but I absolutely know what you're talking about. If I was called a "nerd" or a "buster" that was almost a compliment compared to the other names I was called. I also wasn't into hip hop or sports, so that was another few thousand strikes against me. Once again, it is what it is. I'll never forget getting my diploma and thinking "I wonder if this is what it feels like when dudes get out of prison?" Just my 2 cents.
Which is silly because thats apart of black American culture. Pre 60s black America cant relate to today's black America. Dang near 2 different cultures now
Exactly. Before we had excellent examples of good taste, decency, rhythm and lyrics. Vanessa Williams: ua-cam.com/video/5EdmHSTwmWY/v-deo.html Jermaine Stewart: ua-cam.com/video/HWZisnZ-RGE/v-deo.html Now everything is trash.
My whole life, I have gotten why you date white women? My response is always, " Race is never a deciding factor for me. Though having the woman want me fully is".
Ive been the ringer similar to Donald G growing up in 90's to 2000's. Black girls wasnt feeling me for nothing, due to me being an oddity to them. A "black nerd" so to speak. Now, its like oh he cute etc. Im like nah, im good on all that. Where Becky at? 😂
As a clumsy, socially awkward Black male video game and anime fan growing up in the 80 and 90s I got clowned so hard by other blacks. This was both in and out of my family. It’s crazy because some folks were legitimate criminals and whores but still got accepted. That really messed me up so much growing up. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve been called gay or sellout but it’s way more than any direct racism I’ve experienced . I’m happily married with kids to a nerdy black lady now (which still surprises me 😂) but it was indeed a journey.
I’m in Miami which is obviously physically south but not culturally and unless they travel blacks in the south do not realize how different the mentality of blacks on the west coast is
Funny. I am African and the host has my mother’s complexion and I doubt my mother is even mixed. Grew up in London and I recall having friends in America who told me that in America they do everything by colour. I laughed cos I thought it sounded like apartheid South Africa. I always admired black Americans while growing up in London but my American friends warned me that the thing we do in London are frowned upon in America. I moved to Los Angeles and was the toast of the town on the first night mingling with actresses I grew up watching on tv. I have lived in America for 20 years now and truly don’t find Americans mentally attractive. I am the type to get on a plane go to Europe or Asia for a few days have fun with more mentally advanced people, return to the states without telling an American soul cos I consider their minds backwards and programmed these days. I typically interact with people all around the world that are not Americanized or programmed by the American identity ideology. It is sooo backwards and beneath me.
This argument is well beyond getting tiring. We get it. Date who you like. I was one of those nerdy guys. And yea I would get dismissed as nerdy if I tried to date the cheerleader. But there were plenty of other black women in similar or slightly different circumstances as me who were more than open to date and do everything else the other groups were doing. So what if the ratchet cheerleader didn't want you. Get over it and just date whoever it is you like now.
@@DomSum7 I’ll try to make it make sense. This phenomenon, as you call it, of dating out exists across all subsets of Black men, not just the “corny” ones. So that’s weird. Additionally, corny Black women exist. So why can’t/won’t corny Black men date them?
@ been my experience they don’t make themselves known they’re into you. Women in general. When I was young there weren’t many sisters that were openly nerdy. I came up during 90s, nerds were not in at all. But even now in the age of equality, I don’t notice women shooting their shots or actively looking receptive to attention. They got to do some of the lifting too. This expectation of men having to find a needle in a haystack without a metal detector needs to stop. “Empowered” women need to be more proactive in choosing a mate. Help a brother out!🤷🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️😭🤣
Break it down tho.. BW say he's corny WW say he's his own person BW say they not interested cause he lame WW say he's super interesting Somewhere in here he finds success.. BW he the producer of that show, movie, song WW he's talented
I can relate to these guys. I'm a black man that's also into spirituality and new age electronic music. I'm sure I couldn't find a sista that wouldn't think I'm corny.
Gents, if white rabbit is on the menu, go ahead and order that shit. Stop trying to convince yourself that ordering something that doesn't agree with you is actually good for you.
Not mixed, I have 2 blck parents. But i like being slightly different, i never liked fitting a mold. Im me, im independent and do what makes me happy, i pay my own bills & date any race women i wanted 2. I do me & dont care abt people's opinions like that. I can listen 2 family/friends opinions, but that doesn't influence me any/much. I chart my own journey. Most people are good people, but alot are followers which ive always refused to be in many ways. If im not ur type for any reason, fine, everyone is replaceable color is skin deep.
Lost my black card in high school. Been capable of speaking proper my whole life, never cared for the stereotypes and don't get too hung up on slavery and have hot takes on hiphop culture. Found me a sister who fits my mold. Got lucky as hell finding a black sister. But yeah Im labeled a oreo everywhere I go.
The eclectic taste in music is so wild to me some of the best artists in EVERY single genre and instrument are black. Victor Wooten is the best electronic bassist ever in my opinion and.. surprise.. married with kids with a white lady.
HAHAHA! And now, we ain't corny no mo'. Add some money, physical weight and some wisdom? Now you have Idris Elba that ain't even gonna look your way. Because he remembers.
If you meet a woman who makes you more happy, provides you more moral support, stimulates you intellectually and physically more than any other woman you’ve dated, and she just so happens to be white, or any other race, keep her! Make her your life partner! don’t care what anyone says or thinks! Live your life for you, not for anyone’s approval.
He’s handsome? Is he serious? Hey if he says she/they’re. Me? I’m still trying to figure out what’s attractive about him. I’m biracial and I love light skinned men. I love dark skinned men… I guess I walk against the grain. Color isn’t first in my opinion. 🤷🏻♀️
I think you really nailed the issue I have like a lot of guys in the comments. In addition of being black European, I'm also very sensitive as a guy. I can easily cry and get emotional every time I listen to music or watch movies. I never questioned negatively the idea of dating a black girl. But every single interaction ends up with me being judged or I feel like I am judged because I like games, animes, listen to a lot of music in addition of rap. People called me a Oreo once and honestly I just don't feel like this is a way to help me. I feel disconnected from my own group because I tend to be fair with everyone and not treat black people a different way when they mess up. I don't mind talking to other persons like me but if I feel like I'm judged for who I am, I don't want to interact. Even inside my family that's what I do. My sister had that reflexion about me and when she said something like this I straight up told her that I don't want to have this discussion with her anymore. My mom accepted it because she understands me and knows that the stability I aim for is essentially someone who will not make me feel bad for being myself. And the majority of the time it's someone who has another viewpoint but at the same time will not judge you at first glance It's kind of long so sorry about that I felt like I needed to speak on it too
My middle and early high school days(2002-2004) sucked because I was a different kind of black dude in a city wherein most of my black peers shunned people for having different musical interests (genres outside of hip-hop, rap, and R&B), fashion choices (anything outside of FUBU, sports jerseys, basketball shoes, or fitted hats), comics, and anime. Black women are attractive, but f**k changing my hobbies, interests, diction, or style to pull them. I like what I like, and I wanna be with people(whatever the color) who respect and aren't deterred by my style, hobbies, and insterests.
Honestly, as black men, the leaders of our community, we are responsible for keeping black people together. If you want to defect from your race, so be it. But don't blame someone else for your decision to be different. When you don't have anything, who's helping you? Black Women. Then, as soon as you get something good going, then you're better than your race.
I can’t help but think that this is the kind of mentality that predominantly exists in children/teenagers. I just met a couple of random black women today who definitely are into what would be considered nerdy or weird kind of stuff-to some blacks who operate on a certain misguided mindset-and they were very much into dating any men who had similar vibes (one was already taken actually). I myself have only ever experienced being called “lame” in freaking grade school. Grown women ain’t on that level from my experience but I know there’s some who are still immature so there’s that too. Point is there’s plenty of black women who not only accept men who have more eclectic tastes and interests, they themselves have the same tastes and interests. There’s enough people in this world for you to make assertions or assumptions about anything or anyone
My wife and i are opposite and she accepted me and i accepted her . If a woman cant sit and listen to some music for a few or even one song fuck that . I gotta homie whos girl drinks fortys bruh he is a nerd she feels that dude lol.
Something I've noticed people never speak on when it comes to skin tone is the stereotypes within our own community. I've noticed women typically don't go for light skinned men especially if she's light skinned because of the "light skinned men are soft or more feminine" theme. They usually prefer a dark skin man because they view him as more masculine. Here's what I find very funny and the point never talked about. When men prefer light skinned women it's usually for the exact same reason women don't want a light skinned men, she's usually more feminine in nature. To add to that you often hear men aren't attracted to darker skinned women and that reason being because they, not my personal opinion, are viewed as more masculine/aggressive. So it funny the things women won't in a man they feel they won't find in a lighter skin guy so they want someone dark and that's fine....but when you as a man want a lighter woman for the same soft reason oh you hate your mother you hate your own skin😆 I'm I the only one that sees that?
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But other races of women like the good decent black men. Black women generally exclusively disregard the best of black men and exclusively prefer the worst of black men. Then they get online gaslighting the world as to why they have these experiences with kinda blackmen that theeeey prefer n choose. Then they'll date a whiteman who would fall in a similar character type of the black men they "arnt attracted to". Bw be on total bullshit.
the music thing is so weird cause all these genres black ppl created, yet its not black to listen to half of them...i think about rock n roll , when rock n roll is slang for black music
Every black thinks they can tell people how to live their life or are a philosopher just the blind leading the blind
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Hi my name is Roy and I'm 17 years old I'm like 2 shades darker than you. You could say light brown And I got criticized because my girlfriend is white and for dating outside of my race.
I'm attracted to Black Woman. I'm Black. But I grew up on skater life, pop-punk, boy bands, TRL, Nickelodeon like Kenan and Kel. Now in my 40s, I'm a dork. A square.
So Black Women make fun of my music (Third Eye Blind) one even told me this is not my culture.
Last night I went on a date with a White Woman who happened to grow up like me. It was magical cause we think the same.
But Black Women were giving me dirty looks like i was doing something wrong. They're so goofy.
Do your thing bro. Stay focused and keep prayer. Black men have evolved. We just figured out at All ages, that part of being with a female that vibes with our soul and on the same page as you and is our peace.
I like Foo Fighters and Nirvana.
Did you give them dirty looks back? Naww I probably wouldn't have even acknowledged they existed. It's just so hard not to retaliate.
Smile and nod.
Chuckle a bit.
They had no love for you before the white girl.
They're mad because they know you won't be a stepdad.
Or whatever bottom tier position they place you in.
They freely admit it now.
I was a skateboarder and none of us listen to boy bands. That was like the last thing we listened to. I don't know what type of skateboarding you were doing or who you were doing it with.
I’m lightskin and dawg let me tell you what! The saying “Too black for the white kids and Too white for the blacks” -Earl sweatshirt is the reality!
Typically lightskin people have mixed lineage. The racism in america is by far so stupid because all of us are mixed ethnicities, even white people. Smh
Shiii you in the middle that's perfect. The ones that ain't rocking with you, you can see them from a mile on both sides.
@@bubblegumfetus4018 My comments keep disappearing
Stick with Latinas, Southeast Asians, Pacific Islanders, Middle Easterners, South Asians, and women overseas. At least those groups give us a pass for being lighter-skinned BM. We still have options even if American BW and WW want to be silly. All you're missing out on is child support (BW), alimony (WW), and sexless marriages.
Great thing about that truth is that the people who it applies to can coexist amongst both groups, and get see people who they really are.
Shoutout to Donald glover. He doesn't owe nobody nothing
And I mean nothing
Exactly, the kinda guys positive no get together with and build
I agree
If it ain’t hopppin, I ain’t stoppin 😂🌨️🐰
@@ryanmyers8335lol that’s a new one💀
A childhood friend had his black card revoked at 10 years old because his parents embraced independent and eclectic tastes in their home. Growing up, he dated one Black woman but also dated others who appreciated his unique style. Many black people teased him for "speaking funny" because he used proper English and minimal slang. Fast forward to today, and he still faces subtle slights from black adults. Despite this, his Mexican wife loves him and he’s chosen to raise their children with the same values and upbringing he experienced as a child.
a sidebar; The whole "black card revoked" thing is lame
Really is makes zero sense but ok I’ll be happy
You just described the deep rooted slave mentality of most BP in America. They believe unless you behave, speak, and believe a specific type of way, then you are not "Black". This is a holdover from the plantation where slaves kept each other in line so they all wouldn't get in trouble.
Need me a Mexican wife 😍
Similarly this was me but even as a D-I wrestler and amateur kickboxer/boxer black women called me corny. I was also a STEM (chemical engineering) major in undegrad and grad school.
I married a Russian woman and many in my family called me a sellout despite. I got in where I fit in. My wife is also an engineer (geological) and we make more than enough to have s good life.
Yeah I was called corny. Now that im 39, I get a lot of "Hey big head" messages and stuff. Im very appealing to black women now. I guess they matured and realized that those guys werent a good choice. Now they want a man that isnt in jail all the time and is financially secure because of the hard work he did when he was younger. It went from getting teased for READING to now "Oh I only date men that are educated" lol
I would be lying if there wasnt a tad bit of resentment. Like, oh now that you had your fun and gave what most would consider your best years to pookie, now im supposed to come and give you the world? doesnt sit right with me.
I wouldn't blame you for being resentful they don't deserve anything from you
@@LAZ77777don't be resentful. Clap they cheeks and keep it moving.
Don’t ever give any woman who passed on you in the past a chance. Dont even hit it and quit it.
There should be a hell of a lot more than just a "tad" of resentment. Reject their asses and get a Passport, Bro.
@@Fmlar97 💯
Grew up in Brooklyn,1990s. Back then, if you weren't a thug dude or a dude with money, Black girls weren't really willing to give you the time of day. I remeber actually having to "dumb down" my vocabulary just to fit in. Decades later, it's a whole new world with a freedom i couldn't have imagined back then.
They still are like that today but it's worse especially here in New York City.
MANHATTAN 1980s. GEORGE WESTINGHOUSE H.S. YOU DIDN'T HAVE A KANGOL HAT, SHEEPSKIN COAT, AND RUN/ DMC GEAR, BLACK CHICKS DIDNT GIVE YOU A FIRST LOOK. I ALSO WASNT TRYING TO GO TO RIKERS ISLAND TO TRY TO IMPRESS A CHICK!😁😎😏👌
Same story but from Baltimore
Same in Chicago I wonder why
Same in the bay area in the 2000’s same for my lil brother in the 2010’s😭
33 year old black man here. Grew up in the city of Detroit until I was 10 and the reminder of my school years I grew up in the burbs. Whenever I dated black women, there was always a clash. Not from me not understanding the culture, but rather me not limiting my identity to the concept of what’s considered black. I’ve been on literal dates where black women literally told me I look like I date white women. All because I speak proper English. It’s hypocritical because we glorify the worst parts of our culture and yet get mad when other ethnicities categorize us the same. Being a nerd is corny. Speaking proper English is corny, liking anime was corny (until Meg made it “cool” for black women) liking rock music was corny, not wearing Nike outfits with shoes to match was corny, wearing vans was corny,etc; all these dumb rules and yet when black men go some one who accepts them then we’re the sellouts.
One thing for sure... you ain't a loser. While it can be bothersome, you'll eventually learn to ignore the nonsense.
32 Year old Black man who can relate wholeheartedly.
Yep 31-year-old here who can also agree with everything you just said. Pretty much doing anything that they don't consider to be in the black diaspora is seen as corny. The word corny in my opinion is corny. If you use the word corny not Ironically in the 2000s people would have laughed at you. Women using that word to describe men as hilarious to me. Because a lot of women are corny
I got a dumb question: Who is this Meg you're talking about? Were they some character on a show or something?
Been there. Grew up in Detroit too....I feel you..
I can relate. Black women arent into. Since i started skydiving, became a pilot, and wing walker, i had black women tell me literally, that I lost my "black card". 😂😂😂😂.
Smh
Just another reason black women are at the bottom pile of dating 🤷😁
Bruh that's wild
Crazy ain't it. Keep losing it. That "BLACK CARD" ain't got no money on it any way. 😂😂😂
But I bet they still want ur pilot $$$$😂😂😂
I used to get offended by hearing 'you look/sound like you like white women' when on dates with sistas, but the older I got what I really realized they were saying/projecting is 'non black women would probably be interested in YOU' and that makes some of them uncomfortable.
This was me in a nutshell dawg!!!
That's a great twist on the subject
More competition for them, yet even more options opened up for you.
Preach. Women always tell on themselves if you listen carefully.
I mean if you don't use any type of ebonics or slang it's hard to relate even if we not from the same city we relate
I am late 30s and when I set up my dating profile on the apps I typically put the fact that I am a nerd and enjoy comics and anime among other things. I am also six feet and ripped which helps. I noticed when I matched with white women they messaged me about the nerdy things I was interested in because they were into it. With black women that matched me they never bring up the stuff i am interested. The feeling I got is all they saw was I was handsome, no kids and had a career. The feeling I got is I wouldn’t be their preference years ago when they were at their peak. Just my anecdotal experience
Bro same! That and Asian women... and put my profile up for only blk when I was looking for them lol
They think this stuff is a stereo type but this shit is real!
There are plenty of black women who love anime and are big nerds. An experience on an app shouldn't change your views on the real world. One trip to a coma con in ATL will expose this.
@@Dwbulldog04 bro you ain't lying. Even blk woman panderer umar himself acknowledged some of what you said lol.
Be careful of Becky. Always have an agenda. They have more power than you in a court of law. Look at what happened to Jonathan Majors. Stay clear of Becky. You've been warned...
I hear you, brother.
But the problem is, all the things that were considered "nerdy" or "corny" in the 80s & 90s, are considered MAINSTREAM, now !
Its no longer considered nerdy or corny to like Animé & comic books.
Definitely can relate to this. I was called corny and im now married to a white woman. Not that she was my first choice but she accepted me for me. Been down 20 years now.
Sounds like winning
Ive never found trouble finding attractive and accepting non stereotypical black women ever. My experience with white women though has been they all have this underlying stereotype in their head about what black people are about. It got annoying really quickly.
👏👏👏👏
20 years? Wow! And i wish you many more years to your marriage sir!! 😊🥰
I hope she doesn't see this comment 🥴
Many of those black women would look down on black men with eclectic tastes in music and fashion, only finding value in them when they needed help writing a paper or passing a final exam. I know at least 30 men who chose to go where they were appreciated and have built flourishing families over the past 25 years.
I'm a corny BM who married a corny BW. Beautiful life!
You see all these comments of people explaining there struggles and trauma you made just be a unicorn
I’m an eclectic BW with an anime-loving gamer. Thank you for sharing this 🤎
After years of dealing with shallow and materialistic women, he probably took the first one to treat him with some genuine love and respect, regardless of ethnicity. However, the average black woman doesn't appreciate black men with eclectic tastes or interests when they are young and are prone to avoid them. They only take notice when some of these men become successful and it's only because of the lifestyle that they could provide them. For example, take nearly all of the black men in less traditional activities, like IT, skateboarding (Nyjah Huston), swimming, gymnastics, chess, mathematics, physics (see Neil deGrasse Tyson) or any number of less conventional areas of interest. TBH, black women, in general, not exclusively, are simply less likely to accept a man for who he is. They are going to care about social status and how you make them look to their ratchet, superficial friends.
Why are men who are describing themselves as different than average, writing off their entire race because they wasted time dating the average women in their own ethnic group instead of filtering for the ones that are unique in the same ways they are? If you aren't average why waste time seeing if average women will accept you? Why not find the nerdy girls in one's own ethnic group who have no "ratchet, superficial friends" to begin with and go ahead and get on the marriage track with them because that's what pale dudes are doing. Somehow pale dudes are able to find the high quality melanated women yall pretend don't exist and they are marrying them instead.
Lmao this is so sad but funny and true.
I left public school in the suburb in 7th grade. Went to all black catholic. They called me white boy for speaking proper. I was a nerd in the hood, but im on hoop squad and football team. Brothers when you go back for 20 yr reunion. The nerds make all the money and are married to the prom queen. Trust me, embrace it.
The prom queen was gettin trains ran on her by the football team💯that’s not a flex
I think the issue is that heterosexual white guys can fit almost any archetype and still be seen as attractive to most white women (and black women) they can be corporate, they can be chill stoner/hippie types, they can be avant-garde artistic types, atheletes, they can even be nerds (albeit white male nerds had to fight for that one). Where as for black men you have arguably 3 acceptable attractive archetypes: Athlete*, Entertainer*, and Thug. And when it comes to being an athlete you still have to have some swag/edge or you will be labeled as corny like Russell Wilson which is kind of crazy that an NFL QB can be considered corny.
Yea I have been saying this for years, white men don't have just one accepted male architype, whereas black men from the ages of like 10-25 only have one which is pretty much the thug stereotype. This a recent phenomenon like the past 30 years or so, but the single mother epidemic only makes it worse.
I disagree. Black women love Russell Wilson and think he is FINE!!! Black men say Russell is corny
@ertfgghhhh interestingly enough. Black women didn't care about Russell Wilson until he got with Ciara
I think the only reason black women like Russell Wilson besides being an NFL quarterback, is because he married Ciara and she already had a child.
@godschild4988 no. That man is FINE. He is conventionally what black women find to be attractive. If he was poor, he would still get many women
Simple rule: Go where you are appreciated and not where you are tolerated.
I’m also bi-racial black and Spanish. Even though I grew up with my Mom on my black side I always felt more love from every other race but black women.
I worked at a top 5 tech company and went to 2 elite colleges. I used to always try to date a black girls during college but I realized quickly they never liked me until I started making money in tech
I’m also 5’6 so I understand that black women strongly cares about height 😅
Get you a passport short King 😅
A black brother here bro get a passport go to Columbia I'll save you a seat. Black ladies doing a lot these days
@@jordanfauntleroy2013that’s not the answer grow up
@@georgeojoje4045stop telling dudes to go these cartel ran countries like Columbia, where the chances of getting murked for tricking is high
I had the same experience except my mom is Thai and dad is Black. Don't get me started on the height thing with black women...had one even tell me "You'd be fine if you were about a foot taller". Expanded my dating circle to Latinas and Asian women and they seem more accepting.
Once I started surrounding myself around people who accepted & loved me for who I am and walked away from those who rejected me, I started to live a very peaceful, fun-filled life.
Salute
Amen
Man this rocked me to my core. I'm 54 and have always been a nerd. Played football in high school, joined the military, went to college and was offered to play football for a D-1 program, but am still a nerd. The only Black women checking for me are the baby mommas that want a simp. But I'm holding out that I'll find my soul mate that's a beautiful sister.
There are a lot of beautiful sisters in Africa.
You sound perfect but maybe you need to give nerdy black ladies a shot too, there’s many of us out here
@@Coffeetime1991they want the thugs too
@@Coffeetime1991There aren't a lot of nerdy black women and they aren't into nerdy black guys like that or they somehow think they are above nerdy black guys
@@malimal4972 Is this not the same thing being discussed here. The man in the video clearly said he would find one but she was not to his liking beauty wise. We can't tit for tat when it's obvious both groups are experiencing the same things due to overlooking each other.
This happened to me in the 90’s and I went to Europe as a soldier, that opened my eyes to a world full of women who didn’t treat me like a goof because I didn’t act thuggish and spoke solely AAVE. I’m 50 and far from that guy but I felt like DG too.
I’m still somewhat scarred from middle school when I moved from NM to central Texas and enrolled in a predominantly black school when up until that point I attended schools with all types of kids. First time I opened my mouth to read in English class the entire class burst into laughter after this girl next to me yelled “you sound like a white boy”. I kid you not I refused to speak the rest of the school year and that stayed with me for many years after that until I became comfortable with who I am and how I speak and stopped being ashamed of not fitting in. I’m glad that I didn’t succumb to the ignorance of the “community” and took an interest in things not considered “black”. I’m in my 30s now and have only seriously dated one black woman despite being attracted to and trying to pursue several. At a certain point you need to accept things as they are and go where you are appreciated. And that for me seems to be every other race of woman except for my own 🤷🏾♂️
Do you man. I experienced almost the same thing. I spent my early life trying to fit in. I was in my mid 20's when I came into my own.
Sounds like you were traumatized by that experience and have this subconscious bias with black women.
There are plenty of non stereotypical black women around. You just need to know how to identify them.
It’s funny to me that for every black man claiming what you claim there’s an equal amount of black women saying the exact same thing about black men.
@marvymarv959 I’d say you’re right. Our biases tend come from experience be it good or bad. And that’s just one of mine. I have plenty more….And oh I don’t doubt it. We seem to have things quite backwards across the board as a people so I’m sure there are black women with similar stories
This has happened to me too, but I love my sisters. The cool thing is that there are BW that speak very proper too.
@@ratswagger Yes so my question is why aren't the melanated men who describe themselves this way filtering for just the melanated women they have that in common with? Why are they wasting their time trying to get with the kind of women that they know aren't compatible and then writing off their entire ethnic group because of that?
Us as black people will give each other a hard time for being different but call it racist when another race does it.
I'm a black man who plays the cello... and I have found plenty of black women who understands me ... yu gotta look in the right places.. If you are only meeting black women in the club then I could see why you would say that.. go to museums, jazz clubs, etc
Exactly. Stereotypes are holding people back.
Very smart
I’m glad you said this. I think people have 1 or 2 bad experiences or don’t know how to look for the right people and then let the trauma or rejection consume them. I like clubs, museums, Paramore, books, and all that jazz and I’m with an anime-loving gamer who also has diverse tastes
I’ve never fit into a stereotypical racial box, even as a kid, because I just enjoyed what interested me. As a result, I have what some people may call “eclectic tastes and interests”. Musically, I enjoy everything from Coltrane to Grateful Dead to Funkadelic to Talking Heads to Sun Ra to opera. I like Kurosawa’s and Ozu’s films. I like going to Black plays and Black art museum/gallery openings. I’m a voracious reader of fiction, non-fiction, and comic books.
Unfortunately, too many sisters thought I acted and talked white so they weren’t interested in me. Or, they thought I was too weird for growing locs when the Jheri curl was in style. But, white, Asian, and Latin women flocked to me. So, I dated who was interested in me. That’s when sisters would give me dirty looks or make comments when they’d see me with these other women but, we both knew, they didn’t want me so I didn’t see what they were upset about. Or, maybe they were projecting their confusion that, if Becky, Megumi, and Maria, liked me maybe there was something there that they were missing out on.
And, there are a lot of brothers out there like me. Two of my oldest friends married white women because sisters weren’t interested in them. One friend from college married a Japanese woman. All three of them wanted to date Black women but Black women weren’t interested in them…until they became accomplished in their fields.
Unfortunately most times that BW aren't interested in us, they believe that we should "sit on the shelf", and wait for one of them to give us some attention.
BW believe that BM should always be there for them, and if BW don't want you, they don't want no one else to want you either...
And these same women would get mad if their good sons marry non black women and won't be allowed around te grandchildren.
Am I wrong
?
Many of us have walked this path.
I was laughed at, ridiculed, most called me an Oreo most of my life. If you like the series Stanger things, Lucas Sinclair is the first black TV character just like me. Athletic, but loved D&D with my friend, who were white. My wife is white and been married 35 years.
Keep doing you bro. Glad you found happiness
It's all good but look at this way at least the Lord bless you with someone who really knows how to treat you with you deserve specially after all the BS you had dealt with.
Good for you the color shouldn't matter the important thing is respect.
Same here. But baseball.
Who you date and marry doesn't make you less of who you are.
it does if you go black
🧢
exactly
Yea but there is also nuances to interracial dating depending on the individual
@@swanm3ta850 true that. But in the wrong place and time there could be nuances to something as simple as breathing.
All facts. Being called weird, nerd, White boy, etc by the same black women you're supposed to love. Both my daughter's mother and wife still try to "pick" on me. But I've learned that's their own short comings
It's funny I come across this.. cause during the new year party at my cousins..my sisters friend kept making fun of me for dating white girls...when she knows girls like her aren't into black guys like me..ironic
Yeah I get called corny just because I'm studying Cyber Security.
Nah...that's more likely the excuse you use...you probably just corny 😂
You're not corny. You're way too cool. Keep evolving.
@@pendulumdistinction2494how do you know that? You don’t even know him
Even if he is corny, other women will want him ,because he is ambitious and will have a good future.
Bruh I aunt never heard no bs like that. What bw you talking to 😂 cap
That's odd that having a range of music taste is looked down upon in the black american community seeing as our ethnic group created basically every american music genre
I was at SXSW last year. There was this artist. im so mad i stopped my camera before it happened. but he went on stage to sing R&B and the main promotor of the venue had her mic on and said out loud "Why are 🐱👤 still trying to sing right now" with a heavy sigh. every artist looked at me and said thats crazy. I didnt hear her mic on for the rest of the event. Actually didnt see her after that. the artist continued to perform with passion. i followed him but the dude hasnt posted in a while so i forgot his name.
Has this happened to you?
Yup only been with white
I'm from the East Coast, but I went to a D-1 school in the midwest. I was an anomaly when I tried to talk to the black women, so I talked to the white ones.
100%. And, they h8 me every time I walk by one. "He thinks he's better than us." Nope. Remember? I wasn't good enough for YOU. Actually, Yes. 🤣🤣🤣
I dont worry about it at 34. People with that mindset are immature. That bein said I have had better dating experiences overall with African women. Is what it is
Nope never
Its crazy how many of us have nearly identical experiences when it comes to this stuff. I like how he said "recency bias" when it comes to being accepted, thats spot-on. I hear young black men talking about rock music and anime amongst themselves, something I wish I was able to do growing up in the 90's. Apparently its also now acceptable to play video games that arent 2k or Madden lol.
My brother went to Highschool in the early 90s. Listen to Rock music, wore some rock clothing, and was a musician mainly playing guitar. I will just tell you right off black women were not checking for him really.
I did it since the 90s. I did what I wanted. I have just about every jrpg ever made imported games from Japan. I always thought outside of the box. As a result I have a large large video game collection..Worth thousands of dollars easy. I didn't date everyone around me was becoming young parents I was getting good grades and collecting all kinds of video games. I was enjoying being a kid.
I’m from the south. Dated only black women. And have simply not had this experience. I’m not gonna say it doesn’t happen. I’m sure it does. But this stuff constantly gets laid at the feet of black women with no accountability from black men. No grace for preference. No understanding that no one has to be interested in you just because you are interested in them. Be you eclectic, non athletic, or whatever.
Once you get past the insecurity and peer pressure from high school, you will see height, skin tone, tastes in music, etc dont matter AS MUCH in the dating scene. As a 36 year old black man, you eill attract women who are naturally drawn to tou.... regardless of race!
This is 2025 Black Men go where you are happy and feel safe...This whole blaming black women is pointless....GOOOOOOOOO, "YOU'RE FREE" There's no need to explain yourself.
You can't really blame them though. Most women have problems not just the black ones. Let them know they can do what they want. Always could have. It's everyone's right as long as your not doing anything stupid then go for it.
@@stevenrobinson9856Most men have problems too, you are not in women's shoes, but you would see if you were, ask women from across the world and let them tell stories of all the stuff they went through with men. Men should simply choose better, maybe break out of their type, there many ethnicities, nationalities and races to choose from, all those women can't be bad.
Don't downplay issues that men go through ...that is what you are doing right now!
@pulanala1421 It's hard to downplay Men/Black men issues considering that y'all do the most throughout history in order to be heard or to prove your manhood... Honestly,Life isn't all about you?🙄 Enjoy your day!
😂 been a “nerd” my whole life and love it. Feels good to be yourself and not a society factory made personality of a human being 😂. I’ll stay single until a good lady recognizes the effort.
Nerds run the world . Only ignorant people think being a nerd is a dig.
All through school I was considered a nerd, even though I was a 2 way starter on the football team. Only mixed and white women have ever liked me. This video definitely rings true
At this point, your damned if you do or damned if you dont!!!!
So the solution is to get the best woman for you and F what other people have to say about it
I struck gold…I’m sitting up playing ps5 while she my blk queen (wife) is on sims 4 as i type this she as a blk woman was made fun of by her peers for being deferent not ghetto she likes eclectic music linkin park, billie elish, etc… but was gawked after by men because she is very attractive with a dump truck so she was close to going to white men as i was close to going to white women we’re both 35 i say all this to say don’t give up brothers like what u like but not all blk women are loud, mean, & ghetto etc…good to luck to y’all no matter who y’all end up with✊🏾
Not all black women narrative is dead and gone in the ship had already sailed we're going where we are destined to be not go backwards where we come from that has little to no benefit.
So would you say that the men complaining are choosing to go for a particular type of black woman: ghetto, ratchet? Are the black men ignoring other corny, nerdy black women and preferring Instagram baddies instead and then generalizing to include all black American women as behaving as such?
If they don't appreciate you in your prime, don't tolerate them in their decline.
I had a black woman tell me I look like I only like white women which was crazy to hear
Yeah I get this all the time and they gasp when I say I've never dated outside my race 😂😂 so i make sure to roast them and assert my dominance in the proceeding relationship. Someone has to humble these broads and I'll gladly do it
I admit I can easily relate to this. I’ve been called corny because of the way I talk, what music I listen to (80s new wave), what I watch on TV instead of going to the clubs, even to Black churches.
I'm white and I started dating a black woman a few years back, and when I went to her church as a visitor/guest one Sunday, I enjoyed it so much because it had an entirely different, more upbeat, vibe than the Southern Baptist church I grew up in. So I joined the new church (it is a small church with about 200 members) and I am literally the only white person in there, which doesn't make any difference to me whatsoever, but my family seemed to be somewhat offended by my decision, and have become more distant as a result. They would never admit that, but I know what's up lol
We corny n lame until.......WE GET PAID!!!!!
And still corny n lame being paid doesn't unlame you just a lame with money
Just turns into a lame with money
They didn’t want us and we went with someone that actually wanted to know us. We build families with them and they show us what it’s like to have a partner and copilot for our families.
A bro revoking his bro's "black card" just becos he talks and acts different. Seriously?! Now who's the real enemy?
I can totally relate. My whole childhood, I was made fun of because of my "proper upbringing." Once I stopped giving a damn, my life took a drastic and positive turn.
Black Men...All Men.....We are only products of our environments and the people we grew up around. I encourage you to go to the woman that not only loves you.. ACCEPTS YOU...WANTS NOTHING MORE THAN TO ADAPT TO YOU....MOST IMPORTANTLY.... SHE WOULDN'T WANT TO HAVE YOU ANY OTHER WAY.... SALUTE
As a black man, I completely understand this. This helps me to feel less alone in who I am, and more comfortable being the guy I am. Love is hard when you don’t necessarily tick the box most people expect you to tick.
I'm a nerd, but I'm also 6 ft tall, dark skin and have an athletic body. The thing that helped me was that I'm hip. I love the Lord of the Rings and Star Wars, but I also embrace old school UGK. What I've found out is that BW love hypermasculine BM, but regular brothers are seen as corny. Yet BW will marry corny, regular white guys whenever they date out.
Lots of black women told me i was not black enough...I used to laugh at that: cant be blacker- born and raised Africa, family was is one of the founding families of the country i am from, speak 3 native languages, english and Spanish and the kicker is an ethnic name that people mispronounce all the time. Unless you from the motherland too cant ever call my blackness into question.
I was defintely 100% a nerd. I liked comicbooks, superheroes, drawing and writing. I was made fun of by my older brothers and made fun of in school. I had a lot of anger because of that. I didn't feel "normal". In highschool, Black girls were certainly not thinking about me. In college, the first girl to ever be interested in me was white. I never dated a white girl and always knew I wanted to marry a Black girl. I finally did find one who was right for me, but I totally understand the struggle of being dismissed for who you are. Today, I make six figures and I just bought a nice big house. The folks who called me nerdy are mostly still in the same small town and not doing much.
I never gave up on black women but if I just so happened meet and fall for someone else outside my race then I'm happy either way.
It's not a color thing it's environmental.. The one that like to talk hood and drop the Ninja bomb are the ones to avoid.
As long as the dude isn't emasculated, I think everyone should mind their own business and stay out of each other's love lives.
I'm a little older than the gentleman in the vid, grew up in Chicago wild 100s. I was the kind of the nerdy oreo guy growing up. I never had problems with black women per se. My issues were more so having to go to dangerous neighborhoods and be put in life threatening situations just to be out and about with one of these women. I'm pushing 40 and I don't go to any black areas anymore. Idc who the women is. Plus these new niggas are different. In my day, you could talk your way out of stuff or even fight back and those guys would respect you, and leave you alone.
I don’t know where you guys are meeting these black women who don’t date “corny/square” black dudes. I’m from Boston, grew up listening to nu-metal, watches anime, into comics…etc. I have NO TROUBLE pulling black girls. My girlfriend(black and beautiful) likes the fact that I listen to rock, goes disc golfing, and into all kinds of nerd shit. What are you guys doing???
Fr shii take it from me for i be listening to wierd underground msuic like $uicideboys, xxxtentacion, city mourgue, scarlxrd, and street/drill rappers like 21 savage, chief keef, king von, amd most recently kau flock and i still be pulling women and blasting that shit in the whip which aye some girls fw it others dont which then i just put on my alt/indie playlist
I never met a black person from Boston but I would imagine the selection there is quite different than in other cities just based on all the ivy league schools in that area.
That’s the key word:,Boston. You are up north. The first point is referring from perspective of the south. This was like this for me growing up especially since our numbers were lower.
People love to judge. They assume you should be one thing. Then look at you funny when you're not who they expect
It fr be like that but tbh i couldn't care less for if we aint vibing nor have a mutual likeness on knowing each other and spending time together then why would i waste my time/energy on you when i could spend my time wit a girl who's actually intrested/accepts me for who i am and what i like doing?
Do my Brothas date and marry White Women because they are attracted to them or because women of other races won't? Just curious.
Growing up on the West Side of Chicago in the 80s and 90s, no one ever talked about getting with a white woman romantically. I'm a fat and nerdy looking, considered lame to some i assume has been married twice to black women. Still with my second wife. There are a plethora of black women who dated guys and have multiple baby fathers that didn't marry them for some reason. Yet, these black dudes say black women shunned them so the dated outside their race just like that? Hard to believe kid.
I would say a little bit of both, they are attracted to wht wmn but blk wmn want to wait at the finish line with the rest of the wmn. You take politics out of the mating game most men will deal with any wmn regardless of tribe, men are designed for variety.
I have never thought I had to marry a woman who looks like me culture wise. I was never trapped in the racial box of dating. I dated who I liked at that particular time.
In my experience they werent checking for the black dudes but the white dudes hip to black culture
If you're talking about eclectic BW, I agree, I always see them with Whyte guys. not with eclectic BM
Remeber in middle school (HS now) not long ago, even when my dating life then was not good, I still made the comment, and ofc, the black girls, and even one of them black teachers (female) were saying | hated myslef or "what about your mom”. Mind you, they were bullying the crap out of me. At that time I was lost, and desperately looking for a connection ( still am) , and they were the same demographic who was making me feel less. So that shifted my way of perceiving people, people say that it’s not good, but to me it’s normal, if a certain group of girls ( your own) don’t like you, you gonna go in search of love somewhere else. Currently I’m still working on my appearance, social skills, confidence, (growing out my hair again) etc, and over all fixing myself and to become more attractive, while working on my long term goals.
You got the dreaded *yo mamma black* 😂
Definitely facts here I’ve been with a few black women and they all made fun of my anime and video game related hobbies. Other ethical groups never cared at all but black women loved to call me lame or a dork.
Telling you turn that music off is crazy but very real , most time that was her last date 😂
Californication is a dope song, period.
Wife, family and friends was bugging out every time I pull up bumping Aerosmith, The Beatles, Zombie, CCR, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Johnny cash…etc…had to change the song before I hit the block…
I fit the criterea as well. I grew up in South FL in the 90s/00s, open to dating within my race because its the social construct. Ive only dated one black girl, and she was biracial. Throuougt HS, no black girls showed interest. Once i moved to an entirely different area, i was exposed to white, Hispanic, native American, Indiana asian women. Man once i started dating my ex fiance, i was called alot lol. So many black girls openly knowing i was dating her in school, and still tried to get with me. Mind you, i was just like Childish Gambino. Shes Puerto Rican, we have 2 kids.
5’5 165lb Latina 🇲🇽🇵🇷🇧🇷 probably the best bet for a black man today
Amen brother
Y’all keep forgetting Philippines 🇵🇭
@@BachelorEnergy they dont want blaqs
Amen bro
Brazilian and Mexican ? You talking about the ones in america or in their own countries ?
Most black men feel pressured to say the dont like white women by the community.....however thats what is said in public in private its a different story
I walked in those trenches, for sure. If you didn’t conform you got ostracized by both communities.
So I owe NOTHING to those who did nothing for me but give me grief. Now that I am successful, I have no responsibility to women who often went out of their way to let me know they weren’t interested in me when I was on my way up.
Go where you are celebrated, not merely tolerated…and never where you are looking to be taken advantage of….
Exactly 💯..... The major reason I started dating outside of my race is because I'm seen as too goofy, corny or too white because of my taste in entertainment and my general lifestyle by black women. This was very difficult for me growing up because black women are naturally my number one physical preference. If you don't have that gangster badman aggression edginess regardless of whether or not you are conventionally attractive black women for the most part just are not attracted to you
I'm Puerto Rican, but look like a mixed black dude. It is what it is. Love Heavy Metal, horror movies, comic books, etc. way before that stuff was hip/cool. So, the 90s were ROUGH lol. I went to a high school in the Bronx that was almost entirely black/Hispanic(about 60/40). Forget dating lol. I was pretty much persona non grata. And they would let you know. To your face. Luckily I developed a thick skin but I absolutely know what you're talking about. If I was called a "nerd" or a "buster" that was almost a compliment compared to the other names I was called. I also wasn't into hip hop or sports, so that was another few thousand strikes against me. Once again, it is what it is. I'll never forget getting my diploma and thinking "I wonder if this is what it feels like when dudes get out of prison?" Just my 2 cents.
How many times have black people look at you weird when you play Jimmy Hendrix
Which is silly because thats apart of black American culture. Pre 60s black America cant relate to today's black America. Dang near 2 different cultures now
Jimmy Hendrix is the GOAT ong
Bruh this hit home. “You lame turn off that devil music negro”. Well well well now Chris Evans after me because I’m a Winter Soldier 😂.
Exactly.
Before we had excellent examples of good taste, decency, rhythm and lyrics.
Vanessa Williams:
ua-cam.com/video/5EdmHSTwmWY/v-deo.html
Jermaine Stewart:
ua-cam.com/video/HWZisnZ-RGE/v-deo.html
Now everything is trash.
Jimmy linkin park kid rick AC/DC Motley Crue poison guns and roses Backstreet Boys NSYNC + black short with pimples🥹🤓😭
My whole life, I have gotten why you date white women? My response is always, " Race is never a deciding factor for me. Though having the woman want me fully is".
Ive been the ringer similar to Donald G growing up in 90's to 2000's. Black girls wasnt feeling me for nothing, due to me being an oddity to them. A "black nerd" so to speak. Now, its like oh he cute etc. Im like nah, im good on all that. Where Becky at? 😂
As a clumsy, socially awkward Black male video game and anime fan growing up in the 80 and 90s I got clowned so hard by other blacks. This was both in and out of my family. It’s crazy because some folks were legitimate criminals and whores but still got accepted. That really messed me up so much growing up. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve been called gay or sellout but it’s way more than any direct racism I’ve experienced . I’m happily married with kids to a nerdy black lady now (which still surprises me 😂) but it was indeed a journey.
In the South I was called a nerd..On the West Coast I was called normal
I’m in Miami which is obviously physically south but not culturally and unless they travel blacks in the south do not realize how different the mentality of blacks on the west coast is
Funny. I am African and the host has my mother’s complexion and I doubt my mother is even mixed. Grew up in London and I recall having friends in America who told me that in America they do everything by colour. I laughed cos I thought it sounded like apartheid South Africa. I always admired black Americans while growing up in London but my American friends warned me that the thing we do in London are frowned upon in America. I moved to Los Angeles and was the toast of the town on the first night mingling with actresses I grew up watching on tv. I have lived in America for 20 years now and truly don’t find Americans mentally attractive. I am the type to get on a plane go to Europe or Asia for a few days have fun with more mentally advanced people, return to the states without telling an American soul cos I consider their minds backwards and programmed these days. I typically interact with people all around the world that are not Americanized or programmed by the American identity ideology. It is sooo backwards and beneath me.
@Obaratuyaayaa ..to each his own..I live in Los Angeles and I grew up in the South..my first interaction with other cultures was very positive
Same
I'm from the midwest and they called me a nerd
This argument is well beyond getting tiring. We get it. Date who you like. I was one of those nerdy guys. And yea I would get dismissed as nerdy if I tried to date the cheerleader. But there were plenty of other black women in similar or slightly different circumstances as me who were more than open to date and do everything else the other groups were doing. So what if the ratchet cheerleader didn't want you. Get over it and just date whoever it is you like now.
Hate our women overlook their actions in this phenomenon. But then get upset that we date out😑. Make it make sense.
@@DomSum7 I’ll try to make it make sense. This phenomenon, as you call it, of dating out exists across all subsets of Black men, not just the “corny” ones. So that’s weird. Additionally, corny Black women exist. So why can’t/won’t corny Black men date them?
@ been my experience they don’t make themselves known they’re into you. Women in general. When I was young there weren’t many sisters that were openly nerdy. I came up during 90s, nerds were not in at all. But even now in the age of equality, I don’t notice women shooting their shots or actively looking receptive to attention. They got to do some of the lifting too. This expectation of men having to find a needle in a haystack without a metal detector needs to stop. “Empowered” women need to be more proactive in choosing a mate. Help a brother out!🤷🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️😭🤣
@@username97112Because they are rare and most are not good in social situations. Is that explained enough for you?
Break it down tho..
BW say he's corny
WW say he's his own person
BW say they not interested cause he lame
WW say he's super interesting
Somewhere in here he finds success..
BW he the producer of that show, movie, song
WW he's talented
I can relate to these guys. I'm a black man that's also into spirituality and new age electronic music. I'm sure I couldn't find a sista that wouldn't think I'm corny.
Same.
Would you say there aren't alot of sistas who are nerdy and into those type of stuff?
There are plenty of spiritual black women. You need to get out of your own head. 😂
@@RapRants Facts
Gents, if white rabbit is on the menu, go ahead and order that shit. Stop trying to convince yourself that ordering something that doesn't agree with you is actually good for you.
The convo they don't wanna have. I seen good brothas in my life gets passed over for this.
Truth be told, fake tough guy, wannabe rapper, and street gang thug have been the new corny for a while now.
Thank God I'm married to a black woman. I got my preference and happy with my choice. I never felt trapped or had limited options.
Not mixed, I have 2 blck parents. But i like being slightly different, i never liked fitting a mold. Im me, im independent and do what makes me happy, i pay my own bills & date any race women i wanted 2. I do me & dont care abt people's opinions like that. I can listen 2 family/friends opinions, but that doesn't influence me any/much. I chart my own journey. Most people are good people, but alot are followers which ive always refused to be in many ways. If im not ur type for any reason, fine, everyone is replaceable color is skin deep.
I can relate to this!!!!
Same same
Lost my black card in high school. Been capable of speaking proper my whole life, never cared for the stereotypes and don't get too hung up on slavery and have hot takes on hiphop culture. Found me a sister who fits my mold. Got lucky as hell finding a black sister. But yeah Im labeled a oreo everywhere I go.
The eclectic taste in music is so wild to me some of the best artists in EVERY single genre and instrument are black. Victor Wooten is the best electronic bassist ever in my opinion and.. surprise.. married with kids with a white lady.
Yall brothers need to join/attend Black professional organizations/events that's where you can find the women that might suit you
HAHAHA! And now, we ain't corny no mo'. Add some money, physical weight and some wisdom? Now you have Idris Elba that ain't even gonna look your way.
Because he remembers.
If you meet a woman who makes you more happy, provides you more moral support, stimulates you intellectually and physically more than any other woman you’ve dated, and she just so happens to be white, or any other race, keep her! Make her your life partner! don’t care what anyone says or thinks! Live your life for you, not for anyone’s approval.
He’s handsome? Is he serious?
Hey if he says she/they’re.
Me? I’m still trying to figure out what’s attractive about him.
I’m biracial and I love light skinned men. I love dark skinned men… I guess I walk against the grain. Color isn’t first in my opinion.
🤷🏻♀️
I think you really nailed the issue I have like a lot of guys in the comments.
In addition of being black European, I'm also very sensitive as a guy. I can easily cry and get emotional every time I listen to music or watch movies. I never questioned negatively the idea of dating a black girl. But every single interaction ends up with me being judged or I feel like I am judged because I like games, animes, listen to a lot of music in addition of rap.
People called me a Oreo once and honestly I just don't feel like this is a way to help me. I feel disconnected from my own group because I tend to be fair with everyone and not treat black people a different way when they mess up. I don't mind talking to other persons like me but if I feel like I'm judged for who I am, I don't want to interact. Even inside my family that's what I do.
My sister had that reflexion about me and when she said something like this I straight up told her that I don't want to have this discussion with her anymore. My mom accepted it because she understands me and knows that the stability I aim for is essentially someone who will not make me feel bad for being myself. And the majority of the time it's someone who has another viewpoint but at the same time will not judge you at first glance
It's kind of long so sorry about that I felt like I needed to speak on it too
Never say never. Cause you’ll find yourself looking silly maybe later on depending what that never was.
You said never twice.
@@jamescarter5041that’s the ironic part of the quote that ppl never catch my guy
My middle and early high school days(2002-2004) sucked because I was a different kind of black dude in a city wherein most of my black peers shunned people for having different musical interests (genres outside of hip-hop, rap, and R&B), fashion choices (anything outside of FUBU, sports jerseys, basketball shoes, or fitted hats), comics, and anime. Black women are attractive, but f**k changing my hobbies, interests, diction, or style to pull them. I like what I like, and I wanna be with people(whatever the color) who respect and aren't deterred by my style, hobbies, and insterests.
Honestly, as black men, the leaders of our community, we are responsible for keeping black people together. If you want to defect from your race, so be it. But don't blame someone else for your decision to be different. When you don't have anything, who's helping you? Black Women. Then, as soon as you get something good going, then you're better than your race.
I can’t help but think that this is the kind of mentality that predominantly exists in children/teenagers. I just met a couple of random black women today who definitely are into what would be considered nerdy or weird kind of stuff-to some blacks who operate on a certain misguided mindset-and they were very much into dating any men who had similar vibes (one was already taken actually). I myself have only ever experienced being called “lame” in freaking grade school. Grown women ain’t on that level from my experience but I know there’s some who are still immature so there’s that too. Point is there’s plenty of black women who not only accept men who have more eclectic tastes and interests, they themselves have the same tastes and interests. There’s enough people in this world for you to make assertions or assumptions about anything or anyone
My wife and i are opposite and she accepted me and i accepted her . If a woman cant sit and listen to some music for a few or even one song fuck that . I gotta homie whos girl drinks fortys bruh he is a nerd she feels that dude lol.
Something I've noticed people never speak on when it comes to skin tone is the stereotypes within our own community. I've noticed women typically don't go for light skinned men especially if she's light skinned because of the "light skinned men are soft or more feminine" theme. They usually prefer a dark skin man because they view him as more masculine. Here's what I find very funny and the point never talked about. When men prefer light skinned women it's usually for the exact same reason women don't want a light skinned men, she's usually more feminine in nature. To add to that you often hear men aren't attracted to darker skinned women and that reason being because they, not my personal opinion, are viewed as more masculine/aggressive. So it funny the things women won't in a man they feel they won't find in a lighter skin guy so they want someone dark and that's fine....but when you as a man want a lighter woman for the same soft reason oh you hate your mother you hate your own skin😆 I'm I the only one that sees that?