About 90% of rape victims know their attacker. No matter how close you may be to another man, family or not, the second they make a move and there is no consent on your end, stay away and tell someone you trust. And never ever ever ever ever feel like it was your fault. No matter what you were wearing or if you looked. --- this situation is way more common than we think in our community
I haven't been abused though..My creepy uncle used to always touch my hair, and my mom just said it was okay because he was "my uncle" even tho I was weirded out
You're accurate if you mean men in general but there are tons of imams and islamic lecturers that do discuss these issues you just have to find them :)
+Sarah E But that's what I'm saying. Sid isn't an Islamic lecturer or an imam however he actually has the heart to make these videos with his wife and help those in need. You don't have to be an Islamic lecturer or imam to talk about these issues publicly.
To the young girl who wrote this email. You did NOTHING wrong. With teachers for example if a student even tried to kiss them a decent one would say I am really sorry but that's not right. You simply looked. The advice Sid and Dina gave is absolutely correct. It will go further next time if you do not act NOW. Tell mama and papa. Be brave and remember you did nothing wrong. 💜
Guys could u plz pray for my little cousin shes 7 years old and has kidney cancer her brother died last year due to the same reason plz pray for her health
my mom's real brother tried to touch me the wrong way and cornered Me to kiss me I kicked his balls and ran away! after that he never did shit like that, I told on him but no one believed me. it's been years and that old bastard is still alive!
I am very pleased to see Dina and Sid talk about real life issues. Unfortunately, these stories are real whether with uncles, dads, grandfathers. These stories happen, but no one talks from fear, or just simple shock. Thank you for raising awareness!
It's weird that he has a lock on his bedroom in the first place. If a family lives together and there are no strangers or friends living in the house that are unrelated to you, then there is no need to have any locks on internal doors. I get why you might have a lock on the bathroom or toilet door for example, but the bedrooms don't need to have it unless you have got something to hide. I think that this creepy uncle might have other skeletons in his closet. I also think this girl doesn't need to say she had a crush on her uncle when she inshallah tells her parents what happened. Whether she had a crush not, it doesn't justify her uncle sexually assaulting her. However, if she is worried about being judged for having the crush, she doesn't need to mention that part when she inshallah confides in her parents. I also think that, whether her parents believe her or not, and even if they don't help her and call the police, she still should call the police herself. This is not only to get justice for herself, but also to inshallah prevent this from happening again to get out others. If prosecuted, her uncle could be put on the sex offenders register, and that would help prevent him from having close contact with children. Also, it may be the case that she is not his only victim; and by her coming forward then others would do so as well. I wish this sister and others like her all the best inshallah.
Happened to my cousin. She was 5 and she told my sister that her dads sisters husband touched her and did inappropriate things and told her if she screamed he'd kill her. My sister told me a very small amount and I felt sick, I told my mum straight away and apparently it was an elaborate lie. Years later my sister told me that she couldn't tell me in detail and still wont because it was too horrific. I still believe my cousin and feel helpless that no one believed her.
I have been sexually harassed by a family friend type of uncle. I was 8 years old and we were alone in a coach and he showed me his d*** and started feeling me up saying I'm pretty and cute. THIS IS REAL. I told my parents and they sorted it out although they didn't tell the police. He got fired from his job but the main thing is TELL YOUR PARENTS. I think I am still scarred by that and I am 23 now.
What a sick man hope your alright now,and don't know what is wrong with these people they ain't got no class who could they do this family let alone a stranger it's disgusting
In my community, everyone is called uncle or aunt if they are around your parents' age group. In this scenario, an uncle could be a family friend or an aunt's husband. Tell someone you trust immediately (teacher, parents, school counselors) and stay away him at all times. His next move is probably going to be horrific.
I think it's important to add that a situation like this can also happen to young boys (you'd be surprised, rape amongst males is quite unspoken), so if you are male or your son complains about the same sort of situation... then the same information applies regardless.
Sid and Dina... Thank you. Something like one in four girls is a victim of sexual abuse (the number blows my mind) so many people need to hear this. This is some sound advice 💜
Do the people whose questions you answer respond to you with an update of their situation? If so, it would be nice to get an update video of these questions!
Rape/sexual abuse often happens in the family. Problem is parents don't teach their kids about 'tattling on ppl they trust.' So kids/teens rarely reveal or talk to their parents, even though they feel and know it is wrong. From someone who has experienced such abuse, I'm calling out to all the parents to change this mentality! Teach your kids to speak out and be open with you.
This is the first advice video that has made me cry...this got to me. Thank you for doing these videos sid and dina. Sometimes u cant talk to ur parents, you feel ashamed and embarrassed. i really think getting an organisation involved is a really good idea so thank u once again
I do believe that you guys need your own reality TV show.. I would watch before anything else or like a talk show helping people with problems like this or just giving advice!! GOD blees yall!!
+Trucker Fuentes you're right.. i would definitely watch !!! ohh and by the way, my biological father's name is Fuentes, but i never knew him he died before i was born... but i have my stepfathers name
Thank you Sid and Dina for doing a video on this subject and also for feeling the compassion to get professionals involved to really help these girls/women.
I really appreciate this video guys. I've been watching a lot of law and order svu and was wondering, "how do you even protect your family from this stuff? How do you know it might be happening?" This was incredibly well said, thought out, and clear. Again, I really appreciate the videos you make.
I love how it's just so obvious that these two are such a match! Not only do they give great advice but you can just tell by the way they finish each others thoughts how great they are together. I want what sid & dina have LOL
People have this perception that rape is usually done by a stranger, that a person would randomly find you on the street or kidnap you and thats when they rape you. And while, yes that does happen, majority of rape does occur by someone you know (relative / friend). I say this so that people dont take those instances, where they are in the presence of someone they know, lightly. I dont remember the exact percentage, but I heard once that 80-90% of rape cases are done by someone the victim knows. So do not take this lightly. A few months ago, my friend told me that she was raped by her own cousin at her house when she was really young (11 years old). Her cousin managed to find the perfect opportunity to get her alone, and rape her. She was 11, she had no idea what was happening to her, as a lot of families neglect to educate their kids about this, which should happen, at a very young age, and to both males and females. Females, even though more common, they are not the only victims of rape, males do get raped as well. My friend has not told her family about the rape and still lives with the nightmare, while her cousin now leads a normal life, is married with two kids. I have tried convincing her to report him, but she feels that it will become a scandal within the family, that her reputation will be ruined forever, and that no one will approach her for marriage. Mothers. Fathers. Be a support system for your kids. Do not raise them in a way that they feel they will get blamed if they talk to you about this, that its their fault, their responsibility, that they will be of shame to the family. Me, being both arab and muslim, I've been surrounded by this notion that ones image/reputation is above all. That you should sweep everything under the carpet and keep a smile on so that people dont talk. And while, yes I do agree that one shouldnt over share and should be private about their own business, but not when it comes to justice. One should not allow themselves to remain a victim. We need to raise kids strong enough to fight. Raise kids that are stronger than cultural disablities and "image-preservation", that care more about putting wrong-doers in their rightful place. Raise kids that recognise their self-worth and are willing to fight for it. I am writing this in the hopes that someone will read this, and along with Sid and Dina's video, will realize the seriousness of the matter. With the lack of education that I have received about this, it is lucky that nothing has happened to me, alhamdulilah. Always be cautious, stay safe, do not let this education stop here, make it your responsibility to educate and warn others, advise your friends, sisters, brothers, young ones. Remember, once done, it cannot be undone, and it will take a lot of time and energy to feel normal again, and to be able to move on with life. So live your life, but always be careful and look out for one another :)
I'm glad you guys clarified who is an actual uncle. And yessss I totally agree people like this take advantage of your SILENCE! Speak up girls!! Don't stay silent. Man I totally agree with EVERYTHING you guys said in this vid
the force kissing family members thing was really insightful. we teach children to abandon their natural instincts.... it's unhelpful. thanks for the great video.. keep it up 💙💙 btw could you guys do an mbti test plz.. you both seem so intuitive 😃
Very good advice guys. I'm proud to be a subscriber today. Sexual abuse is something that is so common within Muslim communities and never gets addressed, this video has most likely helped someone somewhere so I personally give you a massive thank you for this.
I have a story for this girl and why she should tell someone. I was raped at 3 years old by a cousin because he had a sexual attraction to me. He was 13. And at the time of being raped my other girl cousin, who was about 3 years older then me, was there in the same room. And she was traumatized by it and started molesting me from age of 3-10 years old. I ddnt tell ANYONE this until I was 17 years old, completely damaged, paranoid, and going bat shit crazy in my own mind. Suicidal at the age of 13 till now and hospitalized twice. I'm telling everyone and anyone who reads this to please say something and GET HELP. Don't care about getting the other person in trouble cuz as a 3 year old that was my biggest concern. Your parents love you and they would want you to tell them. Don't think about anybody else because you ARE and always should be number one in your own life.
i'm so glad you guys do these types of videos because alot of people go through it and dont say a word. you guys are such a big help to the young muslim community around the world! thank you !!!
What you're doing is amazing. I'm glad you guys make videos like this regularly because you're really helping people who go through these situations and don't know what to do or are too scared to say anything. I love how you talk about issues that the Muslim community tends to keep hush about out of "shame". Thank you guys so much.
i met far distant cousins for the first time and they were two girls about the age of 8 and they told my their uncle put his hands up their skirts and touches them an kisses them and i asked them why they dont tell their mum and they explained that they have and she said its ok i was so disgusted and i would obviously not allow that sexual abuse to happen to kids i ended up telling thheir cousins who are 22 and 27 as they seemed mature and their mother got into trouble and they told her the girls aren't allowed to see him anymore and i tried to make them realize how serious it is, im 12 and obviously i dont know any of them and have only met them once so i couldnt completely butt in and im 100% certain they are safe with the trust of my 22/27 year old cousins who are very trustworthy and helpful.
Thank you for bringing light to the subject, it's never talked about but it affects so many, I urge parents to communicate with their children and always believe what your child is telling you, it breaks my heart to hear parents aren't listening to children, always tell someone you can trust and if your parents don't listen speak to someone in law enforcement it may seem harsh but it will protect you xx
Firstly I would like say that what you both doing such a inspirational job by addressing issues that are kept quiet in the whole Muslim/Asian communities, but the fact that you are both able to empathise with issues regarding girls due to being parents to a daughter yourselves make your concerns about issue like these more relatable topics to discuss.
It's so sad how parents know nothing about what goes on with their children. Especially when it's their own family taking advantage of their child and the child is too ashamed or scared to speak up about it.
I work as a counsellor in a uk city and the amount of asian muslim sisters who get abused, through incest, extended family abuse, whom many are trusted members of the community, its shocking. The worst part is sometimes the mother/community does not believe them, or they blame them, so then they get abused again, sometimes the reaction from others when they do tell is even worse for them than the abuse itself, because they feel ashamed and abandoned, my advice to girls is, if ur own family does not protect you, or make you feel like you are to blame, the police will believe you, find counselling, talk about it to trusted people, GET OUT! Dont wait, say you are going to a friends or corner shop, or shopping, dont say anything to the family if its happening in the family and u fear the consequences, just make an excuse, and get to the nearest police station. Stay safe, god bless.
Thank you so much. Such an important topic. Hopefully the girl is ok and nothing worse happened to her. I hope that so many young girls take care of themselves and defend themselves
Most people get raped/abused/molested by their own family members, like cousins and uncles and family friends too. Amazing advice Sid and Dina, girls should always follow their instincts and be wary if they feel creeped out by someone, even if its their family.
I'm just obsessed with you guys, not only are you both adorable, hilarious, intelligent, and have such amazing chemistry, but the advice you give is so relatable (I'm not Muslim myself, and I still feel like your advice speaks to me) Thank you both for making these videos, and for talking about these taboo subjects. Think of how much prejudice and stereotyping and fear that could be overcome if more people were just willing to talk, listen and learn as much as you guys! Much love and blessings from Scotland 💜
Dina let Sid finish talking ffs!! Every time Sid starts talking you start talking louder than him over him to shut him up it was funny the first few times but now it's just so annoying
Tabby .S if you really find it annoying then just leave. Srsly people these days just complain and complain about things that arnt that deep . Just mind your own business
I love how you guys presented this question. I myself am a victim. I also stand beside yall with every word that yall said. Remember every one not just girls go through this but also little boys, so be aware of the people around you. Take care of yourself.
If you are in a situation like this, take Sid's advice and STAY AWAY because unfortunately sometimes if you tell others they will not believe that a family member can do something like this. So take action and stay away from the person, never allow yourself to be in the same room with him.
you guys are awesome for addressing these issues. because of your honest and genuine attitudes so many people have found in both of you people they can trust to ask these things. and your answeres are WONDERFUL. dont let anything change you. both of you are blessings from god
Sid and Dina, I really enjoy these kinds of videos that you guys make. It's so calming and enjoyable to hear you guys talk about these different issues.
It's not that strange for her to have a thing for her uncle. Especially if she's a younger teen, any attractive and charismatic older male will get her attention. It's a phase a lot of girls go through, but then do grow out of. Still doesn't change the fact that he was absolutely in the wrong for his behavior. She can have her feelings with zero fault, and this situation was completely on him not respecting boundaries.
I have never watched any of your videos & only clicked on this because it was in the "related videos" section. I'm only 20 seconds in but have to say that you two are a beautiful couple!!
Really like the way you guys give advise ...caring n understanding .....there's youtubers out there specially one particular one who just jokes n laughs all the way through ...why the heck people ask her is beyond me!!!!!!!
Thank you Sid and Dina for making this video. I'm so glad that you did. Sadly this stuff has been going on for years, with the perpetrator abusing their position of trust as a family member, and especially within families where close interaction with non-family members is discouraged/prevented. Thank you for being in touch with specialist organisations - I really appreciate what you're doing.
So many good points in this video that I agree with!!! I have 2 young children and I would listen to what ever they said in a heart beat, better to be safe than sorry, it's unfortunate we can't trust our closest family members to protect our children, inshallah Allah keep us all safe ❤️
Great advise mA don't force your child to hug or kiss anyone even family members if your child isn't conformable . It's actually very empowering them from a young age.
Thank you Sid and Dina for speaking on this topic- Our culture really needs to change when it comes to speaking out about abuse- a lot of times family members make the person stay quiet and tell them to never speak about it to any one not realising how much damage they are causing that person. Making them feel like they are at fault. Parents or family members who do that should be ashamed of themselves. No girl or guy who has been abused should be made to stay quiet. People should be able to to name and shame the abuser so that he or she never hurts an innocent child ever again. By not letting people speak out only helps the abuser to hurt someone again and ruin more lives.
Yeah honestly, parents really need to let their ego or WHATEVER down and believe their child. They have to have a good relationship with their children so that they can be comfortable with at least one parent even, to tell about these kinds of things. This is important.
May Allah bless the two of you for being so wise and open. Things like this have to stop being stigmatic and both of you are taking the first step of many to do such.
You all honestly have NO idea that this really does happen, if it happened to me then it can happen to someone else. And, I was a minor - literally, a minor, a child, a baby. It will affect you for the rest of your life because you will remember it, no matter how young you are, you are traumatised - forever. I'm constantly protecting myself from men, all types of men. I analyse them and back off if it gets to far (in my line of work I have to interact with all). I'm an adult now and I'm still affected. Girls, boys, protect your brothers and sisters no matter how nice and good these men and women are in your family or family friend is. Sid & Dina, hit me up with your participation with campaigns, I work with a charity who work with children who are being abused and run away and I've always wanted to get the word out like an advert or something but haven't gotten around to it. I would love to support you guys but anonymously.
Sorry to hear you experienced such a thing :( We would love for you to help girls and boys out there with your involvement. Would be be possible to drop us an email on SidnDina@gmail.com ? :) Thanks!!
Thanks for sharing your story! I am so sorry this happened to you, it is the worst of crimes that could be committed against a child. It really damaged a person's soul. I am so pleased that you are involved charity work to help other children who have gone through this. May Allah(swt) reward your patience and your efforts, and may be punish that person/the people that committed those heinous crimes against you inshallah.
Thanks for focusing a lot on how to protect yourself, these days you get jumped on like a bitch for telling girls how to be safe because its deemed as "victim blaming", YES he shouldn't have kissed her, but if she had been taught never to go alone with a man, even a relative, it wouldn't have happened! My dad taught me never to do that and he raised me to be a loudmouth and always tell him or my mum where i was going and with who even if its in the same house and i realise how safe i was because of this because i know for a fact that a girl and boy in my family who hadnt been taught these things, were actually sexually assaulted by an uncle and then blamed for it! Its outrageous but girls should be taught how to protect themselves from these sickos who will pounce at any opportunity
And by the way even if the person emailing isnt underage, its still sexual assault because she clearly didnt want it even if he is fit he had to physically lock the door because he knew she would try to escape and she did run out crying which is clear non consent
I'm trying so hard to understand how the girl think her uncle is good looking. HOW , HOW can she even think in that way of her uncle? And what kind of uncle does those things??
It's totally possible. Especially if he's younger, charismatic. Or maybe she only sees him at big family gatherings. Young girls newly experiencing those feelings could feel it for any man, but it's usually a phase.
Sabrina Pinada there's nothing wrong with thinking family members are good looking because that doesn't mean you're attracted to them. if it is actual sexual attraction then there's a problem because that's weird obviously. i have plenty of cousins who I would say are good looking but that doesng mean attraction there totally separate things
About 90% of rape victims know their attacker. No matter how close you may be to another man, family or not, the second they make a move and there is no consent on your end, stay away and tell someone you trust. And never ever ever ever ever feel like it was your fault. No matter what you were wearing or if you looked. --- this situation is way more common than we think in our community
It sucks though when you have a family who weren't born in the us..I feel like I would be told to keep it to myself
I haven't been abused though..My creepy uncle used to always touch my hair, and my mom just said it was okay because he was "my uncle" even tho I was weirded out
Noor!! I love your work and your amazing words!!❣ God bless
I was about to comment the same but this another Noor did it first 🙈😂💕
yup pretty sad
Hats off to Sid for doing these videos with Dina. Issues like these are often never discussed by men, especially in the Muslim community.
You're accurate if you mean men in general but there are tons of imams and islamic lecturers that do discuss these issues you just have to find them :)
+Sarah E But that's what I'm saying. Sid isn't an Islamic lecturer or an imam however he actually has the heart to make these videos with his wife and help those in need. You don't have to be an Islamic lecturer or imam to talk about these issues publicly.
true
100%
Um sid isn't "doing videos" WITH Dina if anything it's Dina with Sid. #byefelicia
To the young girl who wrote this email. You did NOTHING wrong. With teachers for example if a student even tried to kiss them a decent one would say I am really sorry but that's not right. You simply looked. The advice Sid and Dina gave is absolutely correct. It will go further next time if you do not act NOW. Tell mama and papa. Be brave and remember you did nothing wrong. 💜
Guys could u plz pray for my little cousin shes 7 years old and has kidney cancer her brother died last year due to the same reason plz pray for her health
Insha allah she will get shifa
Inchallah everything gets better !! Sending you love ! =)
Inshallah
lots of duas sister
In sha allah. Praying for her and you're whole family! I know how you feel and in sha Allah sge will get better soon 💞💞
my mom's real brother tried to touch me the wrong way and cornered Me to kiss me I kicked his balls and ran away! after that he never did shit like that, I told on him but no one believed me. it's been years and that old bastard is still alive!
Loool glad you're okay
Glad nothing happened to you and you were a brave girl! Mashallah
Things could have gone wrong, you need to tell someone its never too late
Getting kicked in the balls hurts man
She did tell on him but as she said, unfortunately no one believed her
:(
"If it doesn't feel right. it isn't right" there goes my diet...
My life
Chocoholic Beauty absolutely 😂
Sids the voice of youtube commenters.
LITERALLYYR
yes!!!
This so effin true!! Hahahaha this made me laugh
lol
Piphra Raspangons so true but I feel like Dina is saying more things and giving more advice than Sid
Sid's hair looks much better since the barber video 😂😂
It does!
May Allah keep us all safe
Ameen
Ameen
Ameen
Ameen
Ameen
I am very pleased to see Dina and Sid talk about real life issues. Unfortunately, these stories are real whether with uncles, dads, grandfathers. These stories happen, but no one talks from fear, or just simple shock. Thank you for raising awareness!
What I'm thinking is, How do you manage to find a empty room during a family gathering?
same
😂😂😂😂😂
Probably something upstairs or something if everyone else is downstairs conversing. Like a guest bedroom or master bedroom
most family gatherings are at homes so maybe it was his home and he had his room locked or one room kept alone
It's weird that he has a lock on his bedroom in the first place. If a family lives together and there are no strangers or friends living in the house that are unrelated to you, then there is no need to have any locks on internal doors. I get why you might have a lock on the bathroom or toilet door for example, but the bedrooms don't need to have it unless you have got something to hide. I think that this creepy uncle might have other skeletons in his closet. I also think this girl doesn't need to say she had a crush on her uncle when she inshallah tells her parents what happened. Whether she had a crush not, it doesn't justify her uncle sexually assaulting her. However, if she is worried about being judged for having the crush, she doesn't need to mention that part when she inshallah confides in her parents. I also think that, whether her parents believe her or not, and even if they don't help her and call the police, she still should call the police herself. This is not only to get justice for herself, but also to inshallah prevent this from happening again to get out others. If prosecuted, her uncle could be put on the sex offenders register, and that would help prevent him from having close contact with children. Also, it may be the case that she is not his only victim; and by her coming forward then others would do so as well. I wish this sister and others like her all the best inshallah.
Sid's facial expressions thoughh 😂😂😂😂😂😩😩😩😭😭😭😭
Happened to my cousin. She was 5 and she told my sister that her dads sisters husband touched her and did inappropriate things and told her if she screamed he'd kill her. My sister told me a very small amount and I felt sick, I told my mum straight away and apparently it was an elaborate lie. Years later my sister told me that she couldn't tell me in detail and still wont because it was too horrific. I still believe my cousin and feel helpless that no one believed her.
I have been sexually harassed by a family friend type of uncle. I was 8 years old and we were alone in a coach and he showed me his d*** and started feeling me up saying I'm pretty and cute. THIS IS REAL. I told my parents and they sorted it out although they didn't tell the police. He got fired from his job but the main thing is TELL YOUR PARENTS. I think I am still scarred by that and I am 23 now.
What a sick man hope your alright now,and don't know what is wrong with these people they ain't got no class who could they do this family let alone a stranger it's disgusting
+_akhii 99 how
LIER IT DIDN'T EVEN HAPPEN
In my community, everyone is called uncle or aunt if they are around your parents' age group. In this scenario, an uncle could be a family friend or an aunt's husband.
Tell someone you trust immediately (teacher, parents, school counselors) and stay away him at all times. His next move is probably going to be horrific.
Stay away from him**
I think it's important to add that a situation like this can also happen to young boys (you'd be surprised, rape amongst males is quite unspoken), so if you are male or your son complains about the same sort of situation... then the same information applies regardless.
A man will knock someone out tho a woman can't
Burganza bollywood
Sid and Dina... Thank you. Something like one in four girls is a victim of sexual abuse (the number blows my mind) so many people need to hear this. This is some sound advice 💜
Congratulations S & D, you're doing a solid service to young people who desperately need a voice that speaks FOR them.
1st of all: Dina is slaying the whole game as always
2nd: Sid is a freaking joker
3rd: Bless you Hana and have a long life xx
4th of all u have no right to call sid a joker
+adoomy ok it's a joke 😂😂 she means he's funny
+Saima Begum thanks for explaining it to this dumbass
lmao jks salam
+adoomy ok
adoomy gang!:-)
Do the people whose questions you answer respond to you with an update of their situation? If so, it would be nice to get an update video of these questions!
I'm not even Muslim but I freaking love you guys!!!
sid & dina, this is by far your best advice. 100% the right message and im looking forward to the video about helping victims of abuse.
Rape/sexual abuse often happens in the family. Problem is parents don't teach their kids about 'tattling on ppl they trust.' So kids/teens rarely reveal or talk to their parents, even though they feel and know it is wrong. From someone who has experienced such abuse, I'm calling out to all the parents to change this mentality! Teach your kids to speak out and be open with you.
Btw so happy about the kind of discussion Dina and Sid have taken on! Thanks guys! Hope a lot of parents see this.
This is the first advice video that has made me cry...this got to me. Thank you for doing these videos sid and dina. Sometimes u cant talk to ur parents, you feel ashamed and embarrassed. i really think getting an organisation involved is a really good idea so thank u once again
America well this American loves you guys!! GOD bless yall!!!
I do believe that you guys need your own reality TV show.. I would watch before anything else or like a talk show helping people with problems like this or just giving advice!! GOD blees yall!!
+Trucker Fuentes Oh, that's really cool of you!
Korean Bronze IV. THANK YOU!!
+Trucker Fuentes you're right.. i would definitely watch !!! ohh and by the way, my biological father's name is Fuentes, but i never knew him he died before i was born... but i have my stepfathers name
Thank you Sid and Dina for doing a video on this subject and also for feeling the compassion to get professionals involved to really help these girls/women.
I really appreciate this video guys. I've been watching a lot of law and order svu and was wondering, "how do you even protect your family from this stuff? How do you know it might be happening?" This was incredibly well said, thought out, and clear. Again, I really appreciate the videos you make.
LAW AND ORDER SPECIAL VICTIM UNIT IS AMAZE BALLS! Lol, I'm currently having a marathon - season 1 episode 5 right now.
+Aisha Manir same here! I'm actually rewatching it.
I love how it's just so obvious that these two are such a match! Not only do they give great advice but you can just tell by the way they finish each others thoughts how great they are together. I want what sid & dina have LOL
People have this perception that rape is usually done by a stranger, that a person would randomly find you on the street or kidnap you and thats when they rape you. And while, yes that does happen, majority of rape does occur by someone you know (relative / friend). I say this so that people dont take those instances, where they are in the presence of someone they know, lightly. I dont remember the exact percentage, but I heard once that 80-90% of rape cases are done by someone the victim knows. So do not take this lightly.
A few months ago, my friend told me that she was raped by her own cousin at her house when she was really young (11 years old). Her cousin managed to find the perfect opportunity to get her alone, and rape her. She was 11, she had no idea what was happening to her, as a lot of families neglect to educate their kids about this, which should happen, at a very young age, and to both males and females. Females, even though more common, they are not the only victims of rape, males do get raped as well. My friend has not told her family about the rape and still lives with the nightmare, while her cousin now leads a normal life, is married with two kids. I have tried convincing her to report him, but she feels that it will become a scandal within the family, that her reputation will be ruined forever, and that no one will approach her for marriage.
Mothers. Fathers. Be a support system for your kids. Do not raise them in a way that they feel they will get blamed if they talk to you about this, that its their fault, their responsibility, that they will be of shame to the family. Me, being both arab and muslim, I've been surrounded by this notion that ones image/reputation is above all. That you should sweep everything under the carpet and keep a smile on so that people dont talk. And while, yes I do agree that one shouldnt over share and should be private about their own business, but not when it comes to justice. One should not allow themselves to remain a victim. We need to raise kids strong enough to fight. Raise kids that are stronger than cultural disablities and "image-preservation", that care more about putting wrong-doers in their rightful place. Raise kids that recognise their self-worth and are willing to fight for it.
I am writing this in the hopes that someone will read this, and along with Sid and Dina's video, will realize the seriousness of the matter. With the lack of education that I have received about this, it is lucky that nothing has happened to me, alhamdulilah.
Always be cautious, stay safe, do not let this education stop here, make it your responsibility to educate and warn others, advise your friends, sisters, brothers, young ones. Remember, once done, it cannot be undone, and it will take a lot of time and energy to feel normal again, and to be able to move on with life. So live your life, but always be careful and look out for one another :)
you have touched a very sensitive yet an important matter. i wish this video can be seen by each and every girl on this planet. well done sid and dina
Last time I was this early, Sid had a bad haircut.
He looks good 😎
tell me about it
I'm glad you guys clarified who is an actual uncle. And yessss I totally agree people like this take advantage of your SILENCE! Speak up girls!! Don't stay silent. Man I totally agree with EVERYTHING you guys said in this vid
Sid's face was exactly how I reacted to everything that was being said
situations like these make me so grateful for having loving, understanding best friends as parents. i hope she finds her way out of this situation
the force kissing family members thing was really insightful. we teach children to abandon their natural instincts.... it's unhelpful.
thanks for the great video.. keep it up 💙💙
btw could you guys do an mbti test plz.. you both seem so intuitive 😃
Very good advice guys. I'm proud to be a subscriber today. Sexual abuse is something that is so common within Muslim communities and never gets addressed, this video has most likely helped someone somewhere so I personally give you a massive thank you for this.
I have a story for this girl and why she should tell someone. I was raped at 3 years old by a cousin because he had a sexual attraction to me. He was 13. And at the time of being raped my other girl cousin, who was about 3 years older then me, was there in the same room. And she was traumatized by it and started molesting me from age of 3-10 years old. I ddnt tell ANYONE this until I was 17 years old, completely damaged, paranoid, and going bat shit crazy in my own mind. Suicidal at the age of 13 till now and hospitalized twice. I'm telling everyone and anyone who reads this to please say something and GET HELP. Don't care about getting the other person in trouble cuz as a 3 year old that was my biggest concern. Your parents love you and they would want you to tell them. Don't think about anybody else because you ARE and always should be number one in your own life.
It makes my soul cry at what you have had to go through... Please stay strong, kind and the beautiful person you seem to be!
i'm so glad you guys do these types of videos because alot of people go through it and dont say a word. you guys are such a big help to the young muslim community around the world! thank you !!!
WHAT THE HELL 😱
I love youuu❤️❤️
Hey rmba me
omgg i love you rumena!!
+bull shiza that's disgusting
I did a double take to make sure it was the REAL u 🙈
What you're doing is amazing. I'm glad you guys make videos like this regularly because you're really helping people who go through these situations and don't know what to do or are too scared to say anything. I love how you talk about issues that the Muslim community tends to keep hush about out of "shame". Thank you guys so much.
I just want to say that Hanna is going to have an awesome dad !
That's all I wanted to say.
Love you guys.
Lmaooooooo! Sid's face is utter shock and disgust! Hilarious! Dina, you are absolutely beautiful.
I'm glad my mum ain't those parents who don't take things like this seriously.
If her parents ignore her she should show this video to them u guys raised some amazing points. Welldone u two.
i met far distant cousins for the first time and they were two girls about the age of 8 and they told my their uncle put his hands up their skirts and touches them an kisses them and i asked them why they dont tell their mum and they explained that they have and she said its ok i was so disgusted and i would obviously not allow that sexual abuse to happen to kids i ended up telling thheir cousins who are 22 and 27 as they seemed mature and their mother got into trouble and they told her the girls aren't allowed to see him anymore and i tried to make them realize how serious it is, im 12 and obviously i dont know any of them and have only met them once so i couldnt completely butt in and im 100% certain they are safe with the trust of my 22/27 year old cousins who are very trustworthy and helpful.
Mustafa Mohammad you did the right thing
Thank you for bringing light to the subject, it's never talked about but it affects so many, I urge parents to communicate with their children and always believe what your child is telling you, it breaks my heart to hear parents aren't listening to children, always tell someone you can trust and if your parents don't listen speak to someone in law enforcement it may seem harsh but it will protect you xx
Very thankful not to have a creepy uncle 😊
You never know honey
Well I think she was referring to only real uncles, ie mom's brothers' or dad's brother.
+Nabi Noir yeah still not everyone has a creepy real uncle, I don't...
+alfredopastaplz ...
Selena Marino i have a creepy cousin which 😖
Sid's facial expressions as the email was being read are priceless 😂😂😂😂
Sids facial expressions is me while watching the video 😂
You guys are doing an excellent job talking about these things in your warm, good sense way. Such a good idea for a family channel! Keep it up!
Dina, that colour of ur scarf and dress really suits you x
Firstly I would like say that what you both doing such a inspirational job by addressing issues that are kept quiet in the whole Muslim/Asian communities, but the fact that you are both able to empathise with issues regarding girls due to being parents to a daughter yourselves make your concerns about issue like these more relatable topics to discuss.
It's so sad how parents know nothing about what goes on with their children. Especially when it's their own family taking advantage of their child and the child is too ashamed or scared to speak up about it.
I truly love the positive impact you guys are making on the world.
I work as a counsellor in a uk city and the amount of asian muslim sisters who get abused, through incest, extended family abuse, whom many are trusted members of the community, its shocking. The worst part is sometimes the mother/community does not believe them, or they blame them, so then they get abused again, sometimes the reaction from others when they do tell is even worse for them than the abuse itself, because they feel ashamed and abandoned, my advice to girls is, if ur own family does not protect you, or make you feel like you are to blame, the police will believe you, find counselling, talk about it to trusted people, GET OUT! Dont wait, say you are going to a friends or corner shop, or shopping, dont say anything to the family if its happening in the family and u fear the consequences, just make an excuse, and get to the nearest police station. Stay safe, god bless.
Thank you so much. Such an important topic. Hopefully the girl is ok and nothing worse happened to her. I hope that so many young girls take care of themselves and defend themselves
Most people get raped/abused/molested by their own family members, like cousins and uncles and family friends too. Amazing advice Sid and Dina, girls should always follow their instincts and be wary if they feel creeped out by someone, even if its their family.
I'm just obsessed with you guys, not only are you both adorable, hilarious, intelligent, and have such amazing chemistry, but the advice you give is so relatable (I'm not Muslim myself, and I still feel like your advice speaks to me) Thank you both for making these videos, and for talking about these taboo subjects. Think of how much prejudice and stereotyping and fear that could be overcome if more people were just willing to talk, listen and learn as much as you guys! Much love and blessings from Scotland 💜
Dina let Sid finish talking ffs!! Every time Sid starts talking you start talking louder than him over him to shut him up it was funny the first few times but now it's just so annoying
chill
I know right 😒it's so annoying, she talks over him in every video. Poor Sid.
Tabby .S if you really find it annoying then just leave. Srsly people these days just complain and complain about things that arnt that deep . Just mind your own business
Why are you so touchy abt it?
If he's not minding it... Let them be..
I agree with you. She does it all the time. I like listening to Sid's viewpoints as well as Dina's.
You both are so spot on...
Every patent should watch this video...
FINALLY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR
A VIDEO !!! CLICKED ON THIS SO FAST
Yea me too
+Sid and Dina 😂 😂
I love how you guys presented this question. I myself am a victim. I also stand beside yall with every word that yall said. Remember every one not just girls go through this but also little boys, so be aware of the people around you. Take care of yourself.
If you are in a situation like this, take Sid's advice and STAY AWAY because unfortunately sometimes if you tell others they will not believe that a family member can do something like this. So take action and stay away from the person, never allow yourself to be in the same room with him.
Jazakum Allah khayr sid and dina you guys don't know how much your videos help!!!!
I honestly love this channel so much! I always look forward to it, should really do vlogs 🙌
you guys are awesome for addressing these issues.
because of your honest and genuine attitudes so many people have found in both of you people they can trust to ask these things. and your answeres are WONDERFUL.
dont let anything change you.
both of you are blessings from god
my uncle took in a room and said , "don't tell your siblings "
then he gave ME CHOCOLATE!
Sid and Dina, I really enjoy these kinds of videos that you guys make. It's so calming and enjoyable to hear you guys talk about these different issues.
It's not that strange for her to have a thing for her uncle. Especially if she's a younger teen, any attractive and charismatic older male will get her attention. It's a phase a lot of girls go through, but then do grow out of. Still doesn't change the fact that he was absolutely in the wrong for his behavior. She can have her feelings with zero fault, and this situation was completely on him not respecting boundaries.
I have never watched any of your videos & only clicked on this because it was in the "related videos" section. I'm only 20 seconds in but have to say that you two are a beautiful couple!!
My creepy uncle is in my house right now 😳😰😂😂
be on guard around him, stay safe and never be alone with him. take care x
Is this video about you?
+Daydreamer6805 no, he's not creepy in that way 😂 but he is just really weird and creepy ☺️
+alpha fish ok, thank you for the words 🙌😘
+Bookworm 786 yeah, I'm always with my mum and dad 😄 thank you 😘❤️
Really like the way you guys give advise ...caring n understanding .....there's youtubers out there specially one particular one who just jokes n laughs all the way through ...why the heck people ask her is beyond me!!!!!!!
this girl should tell her parents so they can do something bout it. #battertheshitoutoftheuncle
this is so wrong
I know and I love ur #
definitely, but on the flip side she may feel ashamed telling her parents- it can take a lot of courage to tell someone.
+Umayrah Ali lol thanks
+rosy khan tell the mum just burst out crying then they know it's something serious
So fucking wrong.
Total power play and abuse of trust and power that puts the shame on the person being abused.
Thank you Sid and Dina for making this video. I'm so glad that you did. Sadly this stuff has been going on for years, with the perpetrator abusing their position of trust as a family member, and especially within families where close interaction with non-family members is discouraged/prevented. Thank you for being in touch with specialist organisations - I really appreciate what you're doing.
omg im beyond excited to see a new video!! :-)
Same
Me!!!
So many good points in this video that I agree with!!! I have 2 young children and I would listen to what ever they said in a heart beat, better to be safe than sorry, it's unfortunate we can't trust our closest family members to protect our children, inshallah Allah keep us all safe ❤️
Great advise mA don't force your child to hug or kiss anyone even family members if your child isn't conformable . It's actually very empowering them from a young age.
Thank you Sid and Dina for speaking on this topic- Our culture really needs to change when it comes to speaking out about abuse- a lot of times family members make the person stay quiet and tell them to never speak about it to any one not realising how much damage they are causing that person. Making them feel like they are at fault. Parents or family members who do that should be ashamed of themselves. No girl or guy who has been abused should be made to stay quiet. People should be able to to name and shame the abuser so that he or she never hurts an innocent child ever again. By not letting people speak out only helps the abuser to hurt someone again and ruin more lives.
Thanks for the uncle explanation sid😂
This type of discussion is VERY important. Keep up the good work Sid and Dina.
Yeah honestly, parents really need to let their ego or WHATEVER down and believe their child. They have to have a good relationship with their children so that they can be comfortable with at least one parent even, to tell about these kinds of things. This is important.
May Allah bless the two of you for being so wise and open. Things like this have to stop being stigmatic and both of you are taking the first step of many to do such.
You all honestly have NO idea that this really does happen, if it happened to me then it can happen to someone else. And, I was a minor - literally, a minor, a child, a baby. It will affect you for the rest of your life because you will remember it, no matter how young you are, you are traumatised - forever. I'm constantly protecting myself from men, all types of men. I analyse them and back off if it gets to far (in my line of work I have to interact with all). I'm an adult now and I'm still affected. Girls, boys, protect your brothers and sisters no matter how nice and good these men and women are in your family or family friend is. Sid & Dina, hit me up with your participation with campaigns, I work with a charity who work with children who are being abused and run away and I've always wanted to get the word out like an advert or something but haven't gotten around to it. I would love to support you guys but anonymously.
Sorry to hear you experienced such a thing :( We would love for you to help girls and boys out there with your involvement. Would be be possible to drop us an email on SidnDina@gmail.com ? :)
Thanks!!
I'm sorry that you had that experience. It's wonderful that you are helping others.
Just sent you an email now
Thanks for sharing your story! I am so sorry this happened to you, it is the worst of crimes that could be committed against a child. It really damaged a person's soul. I am so pleased that you are involved charity work to help other children who have gone through this. May Allah(swt) reward your patience and your efforts, and may be punish that person/the people that committed those heinous crimes against you inshallah.
Thanx for having the courage to talk about this. You guys are great! 😇
I don't have any creepy uncle, I must be the only one 😂
this was the best video you've done so far and really hits home.
Thanks for focusing a lot on how to protect yourself, these days you get jumped on like a bitch for telling girls how to be safe because its deemed as "victim blaming", YES he shouldn't have kissed her, but if she had been taught never to go alone with a man, even a relative, it wouldn't have happened! My dad taught me never to do that and he raised me to be a loudmouth and always tell him or my mum where i was going and with who even if its in the same house and i realise how safe i was because of this because i know for a fact that a girl and boy in my family who hadnt been taught these things, were actually sexually assaulted by an uncle and then blamed for it! Its outrageous but girls should be taught how to protect themselves from these sickos who will pounce at any opportunity
And by the way even if the person emailing isnt underage, its still sexual assault because she clearly didnt want it even if he is fit he had to physically lock the door because he knew she would try to escape and she did run out crying which is clear non consent
I adore Sid's facial expressions & reactions when Dina's reading the email 😂😂
_"Call the police"_ *yeah right* what Asian / Muslim family is _gonna do that?!?_
+Cactus you don't do that only pussies do
Inika Insecktorb
Wow you disgust me
And why wouldn't they? A Muslim family I know called the police when a family member was sexually abused
uhm...every sane asian person wud. what are you getting at?
You both are amazing, I'm so glad you're doing this! Please keep the videos coming I literally wait for these.
I'm trying so hard to understand how the girl think her uncle is good looking. HOW , HOW can she even think in that way of her uncle? And what kind of uncle does those things??
You can't control your feelings. You CAN control your actions.
I was thinking the same tbh but she is likely to be young
It's totally possible. Especially if he's younger, charismatic. Or maybe she only sees him at big family gatherings. Young girls newly experiencing those feelings could feel it for any man, but it's usually a phase.
Sabrina Pinada there's nothing wrong with thinking family members are good looking because that doesn't mean you're attracted to them. if it is actual sexual attraction then there's a problem because that's weird obviously. i have plenty of cousins who I would say are good looking but that doesng mean attraction there totally separate things
I was just thinking the same
and if he is her mother/father brother then its another level of shit
the way sid discribed what a unkle was 😂😂😂 like "it's your mum's brother or your dad's brother"
I bet you 2000000$ that dina won't reply to this
gimmie mah money
+Sid and Dina U slay
+Sid and Dina hii
+Aisha Mirza 1000000 not even leing she won't reply or he
Sortcode and account numbaaa paleezeee
Sid and Dina these videos are amazing and you could be helping many people out there with the same situation. Thank You
IM EARLY SO I BETTER MAKE A JOKE....
My summer break
😂😂😂😂😂😂
if Sid and Dina reply that would be so cool
I don't get it
+Sid and Dina neither do I tbh
+Sid and Dina OMG YOU REPLIED!!!👏👏My summer break was a joke. That's it. Looool
Dina i can sense your passion. Love you!
the 66 people who disliked the video are creepy uncles!!
So many good points. Sid and Dina have the advice videos down 👍🏻
Sid and Dina are the most beautiful couple inside and out
Sid literally has the most pink nails, I was looking at his hands questioning whether he was wearing nail polish or not.