If You Have Bipolar Disorder, DON'T DO THIS... "The Emotional Driveby!"
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- Опубліковано 27 лип 2024
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This Bipolar video discusses what I like to call “the emotional drive-by.” This topic can help you keep relationships alive and healthy with those who support you. I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think in the comments =)
Welcome Polar Warriors! This channel is dedicated to helping individuals, families, and friends who struggle with, or know someone living “the Bipolar experience.” My goal is to provide actual tools, tips, and discuss topics that can potentially help you grow and live a more balanced life. I truly hope you enjoy my videos and feedback is extremely important to me, so please let me know what you think!
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-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors: Bipolar Support
im a bipolar person and im introvert I dont want to talk to anyone . i want to be alone and Im happy about that . but little things were big deal for me . its hard for me to communicate with people , because there are times I will get irritable and very sensitive . And sometimes I really hate the earth . being alone inside the house by myself is better off for me
I relate to this.
Yep! I am Too!! I LOVE Being alone...except with my Doggie BRIE!!
I go through the same thing! I’d rather be by myself alone in the house also except with my hubby and my cat!
me too! i foster kitties so i’m not completely alone, but talking to people is nerve wracking.
Yeah
Thank you for helping me understand my disorder better. I tend to “disappear” from everyone’s lives when I am in my depressed state since I avoid burdening anyone with my negative energy and my shit. But since I don’t talk, my friends think everything is fine. It’s a catch-22 sometimes... 😢
Same here! Ghost Mode :D
Btw, I rarely write comments but fun fact is my first poker ID name was WinterKrash!
100% relate...
ditto
Can relate...
YEP!! Thats Exactly What I Do!!
In my mania I actually become the most empathetic person. Om so active in my friends lives during that time. I'm always working to help others, I get high from it. It's when I'm depressed that I just sit and worry about those problems because I dont have the energy to be there for my friends.
felt high for 3 weeks like i was on coke then couldnt sleep for 3 days anysign?
Omg yes!
Same thing happens to me when I'm hypomanic..
I lost all mine nobody wants to deal with my stalker
Yes, this is very common to be this way when you’re depressed and experience this myself.
I am guilty of this as well. Also I find myself taking on other people's emotions as if they are my own.
TOTALLY! I do the same thing. People with big hearts or "empaths" tend to really feel what others do. It's a blessing and a curse lol. Thanks so much for watching one of my videos and interacting with my channel. It means a lot to me. Wishing you a peaceful weekend of wellness =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
I do it all the time and I hate it because sometimes it's too much to handle everything. 💔
Perfectly BlendedNsplended I do that too! I can see a complete stranger crying on television and I’ll start crying too.
Preach!
i do the same thing
An important thing I've realized is when people ask how are you? They don't really want to know specifically. They just aren't equipped to deal with it and will not give constructive answers like a therapist would. So keep it simple, just say OK. And by not hearing myself go on about how bad it is I find neutral answers or optimistic answers do make it OK..
I've lived with bi polar for years, I now have very few friends. I've never been good at unloading always felt people really didn't care how I felt. I get a lot of the unloading by people I know. I wanna help them but if I say anything about me having a bad day, they tend to out do my bad day with their bad day. It's exhausting. So, needless to say I don't talk to many people on a serious level unless they're unloading on me. My boyfriend has taken a lot of my blow ups, but God love him he studies my illness and does so much to help me. My dark days are more these days. I hide away then get up and do the pretending until I'm worn out again. God bless you all who suffer or live with someone who does. It's not easy.
OMGosh!!! I've never thought of this aspect of this idiotic disorder. No wonder I don't have many friends especially since I only go out of my way to see others is when I'm manic or close to it. Otherwise, I'm so depressed I don't get out of the house unless I totally have to. I wish I could help others as you are doing. I pray God blesses you and yours each and every day. ☺
Mickey Hinmon thank you so much for the kind words. A very warm welcome to my channel and I hope you will continue to stop by and learn more with me :-)
I hope you have a great rest of your weekend Mickey😊
hahahahah same i messaged everone told them i was s3xually abused and other stuff was true but not the way to do it
Same re depression and mania lifestyle. I don’t believe it’s a choice per se as who would choose this life? Rather, it’s survival. Thank you for sharing so I know I’m not the only one living this way.
This is literally one of the main reasons I don't have any friends right now. Destroyed the friendship with emotional drive bys and couldn't handle theirs. Thanks for posting this video as a way to understand and cope with being bi polar. Also relieving to know I'm not the only person who goes through this
Michaelea Froemke you are so NOT alone here! Welcome to the channel. Every single friendship I have lost (quite a few over the years) was such a powerful and absolutely imperative part of my journey. If those friends weren’t strong enough to set boundaries or walk away, I wouldn’t have realized that I needed to change some things. I know it hurts so bad when we lose a friend who doesn’t understand what we go through, but we can be silently grateful for them helping be a great teacher on our path... even if we don’t see that teacher again. 😊🤗🙏
Me too
When am manic I am in my own world as well in my depression, and I don’t have friends. I know some people I do like, but the circle is very small probably 2in it. My only true friend God, because he has never judge me and he has take me in his world as I am. I don’t even have no one telling me if am good or bad or wherever. I have been used in so many levels that isolating my self from everything and everyone has been my only option. Even when I though about taking my life, God has been there to stoped me. It has not been easy and at times is harder than what we think, but for some reason God, still holding me up.
I can relate completely
I'm same way I have no friends and God only friend I have and my dog she understands how I am I have bad day with mine bi polar I didn't appreciate when ppl try bully me specially when I'm having bad day of my mood swing I hate stop something help me dealing with bi polar but working out at gym is bad because how ppl r out in public it a pain
I don’t have many friends either, I worry about everything and I’m Debbie downer most of the time
Reading this I thought i wrote it. I feel your struggle and hope you are well. Kurt Morrison bi polar 15 years.
I wish I have friends like y'all because y'all understand how it's feel having bad day with bi Polar
I don't due this because I have no one to do this to. My elderly mom loves to call me and complain about every single aspect of her life...she totally wipes me out and my depression worsens. I've tried to explain how this effects me but she's queen negativity. Always has been but much worse now at 83.
I can't avoid her as I tend to because she is 83 and doesn't have anyone to talk to either.
My son with untreated bipolar lives with her and drives her crazy.. she needs him there to help or she would ask him to leave. I try to persuade him to seek help but he's sure he's in control and isn't.
It's a vicious cycle with her, him and me.
I found that when I wasn't taking care of myself it was worse. Especially when I was drinking. Good people got tired of the drama and the mood swings. What you are left with then is toxic people who feed off your negativity and are the kind of people who can take you down. If you allow yourself to become toxic in bipolar then you attract other toxic people. Now that I've been watching myself and taking care of myself I'm amazed at some of the horrible people I surrounded myself with. It's a real wonder I didn't end up going to jail with some of them. I appreciate caring, square and boring people now. I enjoy the safe zone and don't want to stand on the edge of the cliff with others who enjoy that view too. I think I lost a lot of good people and kept a lot of trash. The trash must be taken out now. Agreeing to get involved with dangerous things in order to please people who are better left alone is a good sign that you are spiraling out. Drinking water and taking my scheduled meds is boring but it's comfortable. Surrounding myself with stable and law abiding citizens is also peaceful. I got so tired of the roller coaster and always being worried. People that work and go to bed at 930pm may not be exiting but they are honest and won't have you out at 3am drunk and on the verge of a jail cell. As I've become less toxic I've discovered that I had to unfriend a lot of people online and in person. I've also had to make a mense with some good ones I let slip away. We attract likes and if you are being a good person you attract good people. If you are bipolar and don't take care of yourself you become toxic and attract toxic.
So truezespecially if yoyre alcoholic or addicted which is a symptom only of a deeper unresolved wound, right.
Im in the process,tho havent yet got good care w finding medicatiin combo that works,been rather horrid,almost as bad,(as i trialed this med w added others for over 4 months,not 4 weeks)
ias the dangerous drinking life,as no real social life yet.Though ive planted the Seeds,and everything starting to lift now.
Inclided the Pandemic.
Please Yes,God,Hope,Love,Sun,Music,Friends,Animals,Flowers,Laughter,Hugs,Kids.........
Please i pray to God for the middle way or door #3.
I do this to my hubby and he told me today he is tired of it. He says there's a viscous cycle we go through and he thinks this will be the rest of our lives. It broke my heart to hear that I am doing this to him and I really need to make a change. I'm glad I found you, and this video tonight. It helps to know other people do the same thing. I don't feel like such a jerk. So thanks.
Hi yeah I was talking to my husband about my past and how I used to be a bartender , and that there was a prostitute..... blah blah blah!!!! He said oh what you were a hooker in front of his daughter it just really hurt me he thinks he's trying to be a smart-ass or insulting but he's pretending it's funny but it's not funny it's really insulting and it's hurtful is that what he thinks of me, and especially in front of his 22-year-old daughter that hurts me so now I'm locked in the bedroom with lights out in the middle of putting Christmas decorations up feeling really hurt hate it
Ya
I didn't know that it was referred to as an emotional drive-by until this video I had previously thought of it as my wife's emotional trash dumpster where I would picture everybody throughout the day at work or shopping or wherever would get the absolute best personality charisma and then I got the trash dump
Viscous. Like thick as molasses?
I was on the recieveing end for 12 years until she started smoking alot of pot and triggered a 6 month manic episode that led to divorce.
Your channel is a wealth of wisdom and connection. Thank you, Rob!!!
I’ve been wracking my brain over a matter where I know I was guilty of an emotional “Drive-by”, but I didn’t really know it at the time, or if I was the one at fault, or If I should feel like a bad person.
A little less than a year ago, I had a friend who told me that I could tell her anything, and come over anytime when I was sad, or in a bad way.
So I did. I told her everything, I told her that I suffer from PTSD along with being bi-polar, and why. I told her every detail, even things I blocked out for years. As we started hanging out together and I continued confiding in her, I asked her if I was sharing too much or if it was too much. She kept telling me that it was fine and that she was happy to listen.
Then one day, seemingly out of no where she told me that she’d had enough, and that I was being horrible and selfish. I asked why she didn’t tell me before. She told me it was because she’d come to the conclusion that I was dangerously out of touch with reality. That everything I told her couldn’t be true, because it is impossible for someone to go through so much trauma in one life time.
I think about that and I wonder if she is right and I am crazy. Or she was in the wrong for not telling me it was too much??
I just don’t know
It got heavy and she ran! Nothing is wrong with you. Good people will know how to treat you but I’m no longer telling friends shit lol I’ll stick w a therapist because it can be heavy
You Did Nothing Wrong, if she wanted you to Stop telling her things, she should have told you.
I used to tell people stuff too, but everyone gets sick of it in the end, so I try Really hard Not to these days, or if It Really need to talk, I ring a Helpline for Depression.
You're Not alone in this, always remember that, ok .
It's sad, I like my alone time and playing with my dog
I agree, although I feel like a burden to people if I ever need to vent, so sometimes I just shut down and don't talk. Their negative energy affects me too. I have lost a lot of friendships, some due to my bipolar episodes, but there are a few cases where l am forever in the dark as to why they cut me out of their life. I'm a people pleaser, too. Aside from my husband, I don't have many friends anymore.
Thank you soooo much! I have been dealing with issues with seeing the people I love. Like you said when I get manic I just worry about myself. I have no urge to see people and I am completely self focused. I am kind of good at bottling and not doing the drive by. But I need to find a healthy way to release my negativity, but at the same time hang out with those I love when I am feeling manic.
I was literally talking about this to my father yesterday. He says I need to come over more. I had no idea why I just didn't care to. Not that I don't love him because he is the most important thing to me. But I could not explain why I just don't come around.
I don't say that I*am* bipolar. I *have* bipolar, or I live with it.
Baruch Ben-David how
Vivian Mosley I take meds, go to therapy, and sometimes have ECT.
Baruch Ben-David I hate getting ECT's. they do it early as fuck then wake you up with a fucked up headache and can't remember shit. but they do help.
@@baruchben-david4196 how much ECT cost for you?
I don't say that I am bipolar. I just say I'm mentally ill and let the listener's imagination run amok about what kind I have.
Thank you so much. Tell you what, it feels good to wake up every morning and be able to call myself a polar warrior!
Rozza Hudson Yes!!!!!! I really appreciate that comment a lot. That being said, welcome to “the polar warrior club” my friend! Hope you have a great week :-)
Polar Warriors well thank you once again man! It feels pretty damn good to be welcomed, keep doing what your doing as your helping me and a lot of others everyday. Have a great week also :)
Rozza Hudson My pleasure! I hope you have a wonderful rest of the week and stop back by again soon to keep learning with me :-)
I wish I would have been diagnosed and found you 20 years ago. I learned this lesson the hard way... Your videos are so helpful, you are doing a great thing!
I’m pushing 30 and recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Since I’ve been taking medication I feel like I’m seeing clearly and it’s difficult to recognize my past behavior such as this. I get depressed thinking about how many people I’ve pushed away, and more, only now being aware that it was me the whole time. I feel like an addict who had been in denial and just got clean. I feel so much regret. When I think about having a close relationship with someone I actually feel guilt. I feel like I’m being unfair to them just because of who I am.
You have a truly exceptional talent for presenting and flawless articulation, and everything combined..
After a long search I only now at age 46 realize I am bipolar, while my only best female (platonic) friend is as well... yet since she is ghosting me now, it causes a lot of stress, triggering a bad type of mania even..
It might have to do with, she does the emotional driveby all the time, typing long stories.. but I can handle it... yet on the other hand, she can't, if my stories get heavy, telling of struggles..
While she has a best female friend, who does nothing but the emotional driveby, trauma-bonding all the time, wanting my friend to acknowledge she senses her pain, more or less.. yet from her she accepts it..
I experience now first hand what you say about, many friendships that don't survive the severeness of bipolarism.. things can get too difficult or complicated, with emotions involved... and then it seems easiest to just disappear, or think: well, it's either with pleasure, or not at all...
I feel like, my friend is one very remarkable wonderful person but on the other hand, her not handling her condition but rather ignoring and winging it presents itself with too many difficulties to maintain a satisfying friendship with open communication... her best female friend just wants her for herself and tears everyone else apart.
The opposite doesn’t really help either. I used to absorb all my feelings and trying not to show them. So no one knew what was going on. And then sometimes I would have anger outbursts out of nowhere...
A balance would be healthy. Don’t overdo the sharing, but let people know, how you are feeling and don’t bottle everything up.
This is me. I only talk to my therapist. I dont tell people anythingggggg and if they ask i lie ive gotten so good at lying that i create these elaborate tales of my life when i spend 90 percent of my time by myself working on my creative projects. Sometimes i go out, i still experience the mania and more often the depression. I still reach my edge. I still have the extremes and the intensity i just bottle everything up and i mean everything. I must learn to trust the people around me when they say they care and they want to help because i dont trust anyone and my guard is always up. Ive just been through hell with people so i feel safer alone in my mind.
It took a huge fight with my loving, supportive father to realize my antidepressants had triggered this latest mania and my back hurt so bad, I really had to pay attention.
I’m still working on becoming more self-aware myself. All the time. Even with everything I know, I still have a hard time not letting symptoms sneak up on me. Thanks for all the great comments on my channel. There’s a link at the top of all of my videos if you would like to join me on Patreon… I can’t respond to comments on here all the time because of how many of them there are. I always respond to my patrons though out of respect for people who are helping me advocate for this illness. Stop by my channel anytime. You are very welcome here :-)
I hope you know how much hope your videos give me. Ive felt hopeless for so long and ive watched some of ur videos and it gives me hope for my future that i havent ever had
Brian Jones same with me..im bipolar. .
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this subject. I feel that it's definitely not just hard on people who are dealing with this disorder but also the people that are in there lives. I've got a best friend, cousin, other family & now my son has just been diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder, so I definitely can relate to feeling overwhelmed with the ups & downs that they go through. And it has been taking it's toll on me. I feel like I'm being pulled in every direction & that they don't understand how much it affects me nor does anyone that doesn't have this disorder. Because I do care so much! Sometimes when I'm hearing that "nobody cares"(when someones in a manic episode) it really hurts my feelings because I really do care! But in order to help them I've still gotta think of myself so that I'm healthy enough to be able to help them. And as of late with my son being diagnosed I've had to be with him 24/7 & I feel that they think I don't care about them just because I'm with my son so much. But as his mother I'd do anything to help him through this & if it means he needs/wants me to be with him 24/7 even if he's just sleeping I'm gonna do it! I'm not going to let this disorder have him do what he's been saying, which is that he doesn't want to be alive anymore. I know that this feeling will pass with him wanting to die, it's just going to take time. Not just a sprint but a marathon! After all he just got diagnosed. I will be there for him & help him as best as I can. Educating myself is one of the first things that I have been trying to do to learn more to help him because I don't know what he really does feel like because I am not diagnosed with bipolar myself. I am diagnosed with depression & PTSD. But that's all I understand. Sry so long, I'm just feeling like I'm standing on the top of a mountain screaming at the top of my lungs begging for any help, so I can help my 19 year old son get through this. If anyone read this book I've wrote, thank you!!! Any advice would be much appreciated! 🙂 You all are in my prayers!!!🙏❤
Jeanette,its been a year,i hope somebody has advocated for you.
Find like he days Bipolar suport groups for parents,DBT groups,mindfiulness for your sdlf,hobbies,swimming painting,spiritual developmentment.
I viewed this video a few days ago. A few minutes in, I hit pause and called 4 of my great friends 💕💕
I can really relate to this too. Such an important aspect of maintaining healthy relationships when suffering. It's taking me so long to be mindful of this. I still struggle at times but tend to isolate myself more now.
I still struggle! Even though I'm a "coach" and advocate for the illness. Mindfulness and self-awareness have almost been as important in my life as the meds I take. The more experience and knowledge I get about Bipolar Disorder, the easier it is to recognize and stop episodes before they get out of control. I think it's wonderful that you are working on mindfulness and searching for answers (watching videos). You should be proud of yourself for that because many people aren't there yet, some will never even realize that they are Bipolar. Thanks for the comment and stop by anytime =)
-Rob
Thanks for the warning. I was told I’m too demanding and it’s true. I had lost many good friends and by watching this video I realize I’m not the only one who could be heavy for the others. It’s a part of the illness to have intense emotions
My bipolar friend calls at 6am. Bless her heart but I haven't had my first cup of coffee or a shower. I listen while making that cup of Joe. I make more sense after coffee, brushed teeth and a shower.
Guilty of doing this big time. Thank you for reminder no me to thank others. God knows we can be draining and hard to take. Also thank you for talking openly about this. It’s helps to support me and hopefully other people will watch too and not think that those with this disease are just crazy and unstable. Thank you ❤️
I’m bi polar and it’s like playing tug of war every day. The cycling is the hardest. I’m great-full for these videos it helps a lot. My advice take your meds and lots of exercise and don’t give up there is a light and the end of the tunnel. Your diet has a big impact on how you feel every day. Keep busy and create a schedule for yourself. My bi polar gets so bad i can’t work but I keep busy and lots of exercise vitamins and my meds to keep me balanced not every day is the same when you have bi polar stay strong!! You have bi polar but bi polar doesn’t have you.
I’m 61 years old and was diagnosed w bipolar when I was 59. I’ve been in therapy and under psychiatric care however for many many years for depression and anxiety (~17 yrs). I’ve been hospitalized 4x for suicidal attempts or ideation. Only 6 people besides my Dr and therapist know about this recent change in my diagnosis. My 3 adult children understand all of mental health issues and how they came to be. My sister-in-law is a nurse who has experience with psychiatry & her husband (my brother knows). I forbid them to tell my estranged sister. Your channel is so spot on. I’m glad I found you. Your straightforward delivery and clear presentation are excellent. You have many good coping strategies and some of your clips are good for explaining bipolar disorder to others, my 87 year old mother for example. I’m subscribed to your channel and have saved many of your posts to a playlist. Thank you.
I dnt understand how anyone can dislike this video he's so spot on with everything wayyy better than my therapist...
I genuinely appreciate the support my man, I’m thought to have bipolar 1 disorder and I have been hospitalized and even spent a day in jail from my atrocious mood swings. Even my parents tell me they can’t handle me anymore 😞 do you know how much that hurts. I’ve lost several jobs from my mood swings and irritability; that only makes my parents more pissed at me. I just wished there was another soul who could sympathize what I’m going through. All I want to see is growth in this society and others, so it really hurts when others make me out to be the enemy if that makes sense 😥 But anyways I appreciate the channel my dude, it honestly does give my struggles and life more positive perspective. I just want any other bipolar sufferers to know there is hope and life can get better 🙏. Anyways, I know I’m venting right now, but sometimes it’s necessary . Don’t be afraid to reach out for help. I understand what bipolar disorder is like, so don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you have any questions 😉
Thank you so much for sharing your story! Peer support is amazing! I really suggest that you get involved with the mental health community in your town or city. Volunteering or participating in support groups, help lines and even helping fund raise for mental health organizations. Even raising the issue and concerns of the mental health community to your political representatives. We have so much to offer!
- Dianna
Polar Warrior Team Member
For additional content consider joining us on Patreon!
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
How you are doing Jácob
I also have bipolar 1 disorder, and really appreciate the support and information!
I have told my close net of friends that when I crash it's nothing personal but I will shut everyone out and when I feel a little better I'll text or call ya..
I've tried this but it still ends the same. Friends disapear. They get tired of dealing with it.
As a person who cares about a friend who has bipolar, the thing hardest to handle is not emotional drivebys but rather the abrupt flip/flop ---hearing one day "I am your friend, and am here for you" and the next day they hate you and they cut off all communication. I found polar warriors a few nights ago and have been watching several videos every day. Thank you so much for making these videos, for your kindness, and for the way you explain things -- you make things so clear. But they are so hard to watch -- it is heartbreaking to be learning what my friend goes through. I am a senior citizen and my friend is a young kid. over the past year I have seen a "pattern" if you will, that we are friends for a couple months and then he needs to kind of hole up and deal with things alone. Now, I thought this was totally normal given the difference in our ages , I only learned of his diagnosis over the summer. I don't know if this will make sense to you but at the end of summer he"reappeared" again and he has been my kind friend, but then 3 days after a good but rather emotional conversation he texted that he was done with the friendship. I know he is in a bad way and I tried to reach out to no avail. I saw the video of your mother answering questions and was so impressed when she said she just had to let go. It is the hardest thing to do, especially when you know your friend is in a bad way, but I am doing it. As a friend do I just wait and see if he ever resumes contact? Is there anything I can do to support him? Thanks
Hi, thanks for reaching out. The best way to talk to Rob directly is through Patreon. He responds to direct messages only on that platform. If you are already a Patron, just cut and paste what you wrote into a message and put the recipient as Polar Warriors and that is Rob exclusively. Take care!
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nd
For ten dollars a month you can message Rob directly, watch videos that are more personal in nature and have access to a great community.
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Thanks for sharing your story. I watched a couple of your videos and I like your take on things. I have a friend who suffers from bipolar disorder, and I'm his Mc Donalds. I'm on the verge of giving up on him (and have been for a couple of years), breaking contact, because I can't take his negativity anymore. Watching your videos have always given me just enough energy and compassion to stick with it, but I don't know how long I can keep doing this. In our relationship I feel like I'm a sensitive little bunny rabbit lost in a tornado.
Just me ranting ;p Keep up the good work, I hope one day my friend will watch some of your stuff and maybe find some clarity and insight.
We are only responsible for our own health and well being except when you have small children. You do not deserve to be treated poorly by anyone. One thing I have learned is that its okay to love certain people from afar, they do not need to have access to your life. If you feel its time, wish them well and move on. We need to protect our own mental health.
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
Rob:
I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Changing jobs is very real to me
I was a dentist, an offshore safety engineer, a corporate Trainer, a business owner and now I work for Google-Dubai
At last it all makes sense now!
Thank you for your channel. I just got diagnosed with bipolar 2 disorder and this channel has helped me learn more about it and make changes too better my life. With the 2 disorder I suffer so so much from depression and dont have as much energy in a hypomanic phase so I kept getting misdiagnosed with depression for years. I feel I have a hard time doing more for my friends and family so this was a amazing wake up call so thank you so much!
Tru keeping a diary. For me, along w/ therapy & my network of true friends, helps a lot. Bipolar Disorder is not easy, but it can be managed. 👄❤
Tanya Alexander Yes!!! Thank you so much for watching the video and taking the time to comment with some suggestions that work well for you. I love hearing about what other people do to cope with the illness. We can all help each other by sharing things like that. Welcome to the channel!
Thank you 🙏🏽 for informing me about the emotional drive by! That’ll really teach me how to NOT let my emotions/problems be known to others who are having problems themselves.
I call it being an emotional verbal punching bag. I would get self defensive immediately because he (my boyfriend with bipolar of 5 years) would throw me straight into it by accusing me of absurd things and then haranguidly taking off on it! As I learned more about his condition I learned how to recognize that he was episoding and I would stop trying to defend myself and walk away from him. This was to quit arguing with him and therefore feeding his emotional fire. When his emotional flames toned down he would be all apologetic and return to a more level state. You are teaching me more and giving me so much more insight into his mind than I have ever found anywhere else! Thank you and please keep healing us. You are extremely important to me right now and countless others as I read their comments. You are a huge and very much needed blessing! God Bless your life Robert!
Thankyou for sharing powerful pillars in bipolar i appreciate.
Great topic! Another big thank you for your terrific work! Big hugs!
Kelly Hendrickson Thank you so much my dear friend. Right back at you! I really like the concept of this one also. Hope you have a great week :-)
Thank you for explaining the emotional drive-by. I have been do guilty of this and realize now why I have lost so many friendsx over the years. Also need to give my husband a break from unloading on him so often.
Thanks for taking the time to make these videos. Along with the information and advice it gives me a place to go when I start to feel isolated. Rather than do the emotional driveby I tend to keep things to my self. I've been on meds for several years now and they tend to dull my emotions. Sometimes it feels like a high price to pay but It's a hell of a lot better than the roller coaster that was my life.
You are changing my life🙏🏻❤️ learning so much about myself..
My heart 💓 is with you , excuse people who don't understand you.
Thanks for sharing these information .
Am sending you a huge ‘drive by’ hug. I recognize all you say and the tools are so welcome.
Thank you I really appreciate your time making these videos. They are helping me understand my illness better.
ZeroGHome24 Welcome to the channel and that is exactly what I’m here for my friend! I’m also really proud of you for searching for answers. The more you know about the illness, the more self-aware you will become of symptoms and life just gets smoother. Thank you for the kind words and stop by anytime… Lots more videos to come :-)
So glad I found you and this channel! I recently learned the term "trauma dumping," which is the same thing as the "emotional drive by." I've slammed so many people with this over the years, despite meds and therapy. Once I begin to dump, I can't stop myself; in my head I'm screaming "STOP!! LOOK AT THEIR BODY LANGUAGE!!! THEY'RE REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE AND YOU DON'T KNOW THEM WELL ENOUGH FOR THIS!!! STOP!!!!"... but that only works sometimes.
Something I started doing in the last few years, which seems to help, is to say to people; "I'm not going to make you my therapist. Tell me about your world?" Although I don't do it 100%, I am doing it more frequently, close friends have actually thanked me for that heads up.
Thanks for another great video, Rob.
I'm so glad you are sharing your information with the world. You have helped me so much to understand my boyfriend of 2 years. Please keep posting.
Cynthia Melchor you are so very welcome Cynthia! I’m glad you found my channel and I respect you so much for trying to learn more about this illness for your partner. That’s huge and I wish more people would do that. I know it can be extremely painful and confusing to be with someone who has this illness. It takes a really big heart, a lot of patience, and a strong tongue from biting it all the time LOL. If you ever have any questions, I will always do my best to help :-)
So true! Thank you for pointing this out! Helps me a lot!
Wow you put it into words. Thank you, this is the most relatable content about the bipolar experience and makes me feel no so alone.
One of my therapists called this "being a stress sponge".
You have the best videos on bi polar
Thank you for this message. You really helped me out. I was about to commit such an act on someone i love very much. Now, i backed off and gathered myself. Sent that text too. Love the channel.
Thank you so much for making this video.
Thank you for sharing your knowledge.
This is a lesson I need to learn. My journal is taking a burden of my friends... But this is still important.
Bi-polar 1 here. Good support for my mind were not alone. I'm not alone millions have this crazy shit in their daily lives.
I can't thank you enough for your content. You are helping me understand this disorder, which helps me in turn to be more helpful. Also - and don't misunderstand me please, I have a deep respect and affection for my family member who has bipolar - how to react and protect myself. I was completely in the dark up until now and understanding better helps me actively and consciously guide certain situations (like the emotional drive by) in a more constructive direction (as previous to before, when I was just left frozen and confused). I want to help, but I need to learn how first.
I want to thank you very much for giving us excellent feedback on how to deal with and understand our bi polar symptoms and to help us cope with our disease you give positive advice because you have the same disease we have and I enjoy your videos very much
God bless you! I have binge watched your videos as a family member suffers from this. You are putting yourself on the line by helping others. There is nothing else out there like what you are doing. Take care and be well!
Wow, thank you Susan! Take gentle care as well!
Thanks and what a great topic! Its very helpful to hear!
Thanks for making these videos!!!!!
thanks so much im loving your advice. im traying to help my bipolar father to live the happiest life he can
Lol. Image of emotional drive by!!! 🤣😂 lopping emotional mortars and grenades from a back of truck thinking 'yep they know what this is about' then a 'have a great day ...byeee"
Again, well done. It will definitely have me thinking and evaluating my interactions with friends. Friends are all to me, and if this helps me keep them, it is worth considering.
Sandra A I’m so glad the video helped Sandra and thank you for taking the time to comment again. It really means a lot to me and helps grow my channel… Which helps me reach more people! 😊😊
Hope you have a great start to your week!
Relationship saver!
Life saver!
God bless you Robert
Your a hero man thank you for this.
Thank you so much. I’ve been going from manic to psychosis and you helped me out so much, listening to your videos was very informative and I found relaxing which was as you know so helpful when in such a horrible state. I hate hearing the voices it is so hard and hurts my head so much. They always tell me to hang myself in the closet and commentate everything I do so pessimistically. The female voice is just a evil but the only one that will tell the males to quiet down at times. It’s hard to function when you have multiple people screaming at you that are invisible. I realized I was bipolar type one after I was admitted to the hospital I got my diagnosis. I’m sad others are suffering but comforted that I am not alone in this. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. My daughter is the one thing that has kept me from listening to the voices and ending everything. I worry for people that don’t have that motivation like I do. I don’t know how they hack it. If you haven’t already make a video about motivation if you don’t have children for a reason to keep you from suicide. Thanks for all your help.
This hit home . Ive been in a real depressed state of mind this past few months and I have been careful trying not to be so negative in my conversations with friends and family . I find myself staying to myself allot more so that I don't stress people out . Keeping in mind ...This too shall pass.
Yes! I'm STILL working on the same thing. I've asked my friends to gently point out when they think I'm being overly negative. Sometimes I just don't see it. Your friends can help be an early warning system for an episode coming. It takes the right people to do that, but see if you can get some of them on board =)
-Rob
You are 100% spot on amazing
This is an awesome channel and thank you so much!!! I watched the one today about cortisol and its effects bi-polar disorder. Thanks for taking your time to educate people on the disorder.
Mickey Hinmon i’m so glad the channel has helped and a very warm welcome. Please stop by anytime to learn more with me!😊
You help me more than you will ever know. Thank you. I come back to your channel time and time again.
Hi Candice! I'm so glad you find Rob's channel to be so helpful. If you'd like to help support Rob in what he does with Polar Warriors I'd encourage you to consider joining him on Patreon. He is able to reply to direct messages on that platform and he posts some exclusive content there. There is also a wonderful support community in the community section. I'll include a link for you to check it out! Thank you for being a loyal subscriber!! :) -Rachel (Polar Warriors Team Member)
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I had already seen this video, however now that I see it again I realized many things. There are so many people's behaviors that I need to change regarding my surroundings and how I maintain my boundaries with people. Thank you! Also, thanks for the tools to manage our negativity
Wow, that's cool! It's nice to know the video had a positive impact on you. Keep up the good work on setting those boundaries!
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
@@PolarWarriors 🫂✨
Yes yes yes, and yes. Did I mention yes.
I can relate to this so so much.
I came to know about this problem in me about a week. Since, I am suffering from this disorder. Because of my mood swings, anger unnecessarily, very happy so much at some of the time. Thank you for your experience with explanation. Hats off to you.
Aarav Yadav I think it is great that you are searching for answers and trying to learn more. I wish more people would do that. I hope the videos help and you are very welcome here. Stop back by anytime :-)
polar you are amazing im so proud of you
Thanks for your videos. Its so helpful. Keep doing. Never I heard so realisty words before. I am bipolar and now I just trying to get out my bipolar friend from his down fase.
This is so me😠 I live alone so i do this and don't know it's coming even though i know it's coming. I've lost all my friends. My meds aren't working and keep putting off the doctor😣 It's awful and frustrating.
Constance Duquette I'm sorry I know being alone sucks. But I can feel alone in a crowd of people but actually the last time I was in a crowd of people I was the only born again Christian and the crowd of people was my Mormon family. Man and that's? Well I rarely go over there but my sister high-jacked me and I realize I can not go anywhere if I don't sike myself out to behave and act neural typically. So I forgot and embarrassed myself and I want to remember that I don't do surprises. I feel better if I don't leave home very often it is like it is better to tell the truth for the truth is easier to remember. And I don't understand social media but he says there are a bunch of people on Facebook, but I'm thinking didn't they just have another big problem. Well you are not alone. Maybe some one will come along and give a suggestions. I guess we can fake till we make it. Cheers🙃😉
I'm so sorry you both feel that way. I would like to suggest attending or volunteering in the mental health community in your town or city. See if there are any support group or self help classes. Even arts or crafts classes or any other interests you have. Peer support is so important. 🙏🌞🌞🌞
- Rob
For additional content consider joining us on Patreon!
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Woooooow, I'm only two minutes into this video and its a huge eye opener. Thank you so much. I wish I realized this when I was with my ex. Maybe I could have sent this video to them so that they could 7nderstand how I felt when we were together. And I wish I understood them better, now I know. Thank you so much, I really appreciate your videos. 🙏🏾
It's a so much important thing. Never think you are the only one which got emotional problems. Every human being is unique With their defects and their qualities. Keep your focus in your qualities. And never let your defects become a hinderance to life go on.
Thanks for the reminder ❤
Always!
I just recently became familiar with what an empty was lol awesome.
You have made some good points.
This is really interesting! I don't like to burden or bum people out with my negativity. People just don't want to hear negative things and they don't like intense people either. I've had friends in the past use me for the emotional drive by and I can't handle other people's stuff with so much of my own stuff to deal with. Thanks so much for the videos they are really enlightening and useful!
Cecily i’m so glad the video helped. I really like this concept. It became quite popular for one of my earlier videos. I hope you will continue to stop by my channel. I have lots of great information here. I do my best to respond and help everyone, but it’s been getting a lot harder with how many comments, emails, and messages I get. If you would like to support what I’m doing, have access to a lot of content that is not on UA-cam, and always have a direct line of communication to me, consider checking out my Patreon page. I will include a link below just in case you’d like to take a look :-)
Stay well this week and talk to you soon!
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
-Robert
Thank you for your video!
Larisa Madolimov You’re most welcome :-)
I want to say thank you. Watching your channel is helping me get along with some family members who have this disorder.
I dont have the disorder i have adhd and autistic, but one of my dear friends is bipolar. I had to quit being around her because she would only do the emotional drive byes. I told her I couldn't handle the disorder not until she got stable. She got super mad and when i decided to check on her a couple years ago she called me a bunch of names one because being schooled at home, mentally ill and trolling. I have forgiven her but its hard to be not think of her and her hate my guts because i needed some space.
I just wanted to explain things. And thanks for the video.
Thanks for this, I love your videos!
Glad you like them!
I've gotten better at avoiding the drive by. It does help that my main social support people live at least 1500 miles away, so I can't just interrupt their lives to make myself their primary focus. Having a good therapist who does phone appointments when needed is also hugely beneficial.
We need more people like you
I recently discovered that someone I had the start of a relationship with was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder nearly 25 years ago. The thing im struggling with most is her emotional driveby's that she was pulling. I wasnt aware of her diagnosis until only hours before she left in a fit of rage. Ive known her for well over 20 years and didnt know that she had stopped taking all medications almost 4 years ago. She lost her job of 9 year and shortly there after, her home. She is now homeless and jumps between childrens places for a place to sleep. I dont know what to or how to help her but its obvious that she needs plenty. I had to draw a line after the last situation and unfortunately, she can also blame me for not supporting her like she does her direct family. Until i started watching these videos, I was certainly feeding into the issue and i feel terrible about it. Thank you for the videos! I at least now know a lot more than i did about this debilitating illness. Keep up the great work!
Thank you so much for sharing your story!
Thank you-- this helped me today--
Thanks. I wrote about a topic, last night, that relates to things said in this video.
I'm watching this after I just unloaded on someone, immediately realized it was too much for him, and apologized. I, definitely, have to be more careful. Thanks, for the video. You can't imagine how much I appreciate your videos. Thank you.
Thank YOU!
im changing already hearing this big ooooops had no idea what i was doing so unaware thanku u just helped me so much my hubby will be more happy will try calling some f4iends make it about them for a change
Rob - your awesome man! From your Kenpo brother.
Damon Maxey Wow!!!!! So amazing to see a comment from you my old friend. It’s by chance that I saw it today. I hope you’re doing well. Life has been one heck of a bittersweet experience this last decade. Send me an email with your contact info so we can connect: PolarWarriors@Gmail.com