Hitch was Strangely Ahead of its Time
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- Опубліковано 6 чер 2024
- In this video, I discuss 2005’s Hitch and how it may have inadvertently related to pick-up culture, ultimately subverted it, and by extension criticized the modern-day alpha/redpill communities in the manosphere.
Support the channel, if you like ✨: / qualityculture
Some cool creators that discuss self-improvement (and dating/relationships) in a healthy way:
Dr. K is a psychiatrist who’s built a great community around improving mental health and social connections (including romantic): / healthygamergg
~ Getting a Girlfriend is NOT an Achievable Goal:
• Getting a Girlfriend i...
~ The Rise of Lonely, Single Men:
• The Rise of Lonely, Si...
~ Pickup Artistry, Dating, & Building Confidence: • Pickup Artistry, Datin...
Esther Perel is a psychotherapist that discusses the complexities of modern relationships on several platforms, including various lectures, a podcast, and UA-cam:
/ perelesther
~ Here’s an insightful talk:
• Famed Relationship The...
This video by Macabre Storytelling discusses pick-up artistry in a nuanced way, including practical dating advice at the 54min mark:
• Male Dating & Sex Stru...
Hayley Quinn is a dating coach who offers ethical advice that avoids relying on archaic dating rules and manipulative practices: / hayleyquinn
Clark Kegley offers helpful self-improvement advice (including on relationships):
• The best relationship ...
0:00 Intro
1:11 The Date Doctor
6:44 Deconstructing Hitch
11:46 Modern Pick-Up Artists - Розваги
Like I mentioned in the video, if we’re gonna call out questionable content it’s also important to provide healthy/nuanced alternatives for people who genuinely just want practical dating advice. Check out the channels I linked in the description and let me know about other creators I might’ve missed!
I hope you review The Woman King
I like watching your video. Maybe it could have included some of the healthy advice or you could do another video on the topic.
I really liked ThoughtSlime's video on dating advice (which I also made a top level comment about). ua-cam.com/video/zJ8EeWK8yEw/v-deo.html
It was the first non-patronizing, honest one I'd seen.
If you find that this film criticizes the flaws and hubris of the Redpill/Manosphere as it is nowadays, then I am afraid that you are not informed enough about what the so-called Manosphere is, in first place.
As much nitpicking at a piece of the iceberg that made the Titanic sunk.
With the exception of Dr K who admits theres merrit to the old pickup though highly toxic, how is the dating advice in the description any different from the rest other than its women giving it?
One of my observations about this movie is that everything Hitch said men should do to get women, Sarah did to him. She was unknowingky following "the steps" and he didn't even realize it. The ultimate Uno reverse LOL
Whaaaaat I didn’t even realize that!!!
Oh damn, I need to rewatch the movie with this in mind then! 🤯
U sneaky bastard! I need to re-watch now... 👍🏾
Now I’m going to have to rewatch for this.
How do you know she didn't know? 😏
What Hitch did was give guys a magic feather of confidence. His tips were actually useful, but mostly it was all about making guys think they had that magic feather that would let them fly, which allowed them to interact with the girls they were interested in.
It was like bugs giving the toon squad the magic juice to make them good at basketball on spaced jam lol same concept
It was the Ruby slippers for Dorothy
Yep
Only thing I gotta say is...
"To love is to allow someone to utterly destory you, but trust that they never will!"
-johnny bravo
concur
wait a moment.. is that a johny bravo quote for real?
Yeah, that's why you stay liking your girl and not loving her.
Cant find any source confirming it's a JB quote. Gonna call bullshit on that one.
E. Lockhart (or Emily Jenkins), not Johnny Bravo
I do definitely feel that this film is a much better demonstration of 'date coaching', I'd rather live in this movies reality than the entirely sleazy and disrespectful game of pick up artists today
There’s no difference lmao
we had this movie on dvd growing up (pretty sure we still do lmao) and I watched it all the time, and I still think about the 90% 10% thing, just because it's all about consent. you show you wanna kiss them, but make sure they make the move, it always resonated with me
That's a good legitimate move.
I grew up with this movie too and I agree. If you do the 90% and they're visibly not into it, it's a good sign to back off. But I watched this movie with my mom, who's a psychologist, so she was the one who put that together and explained it to me. I think it's good that Hitch, for all its' flaws, says to listen to people and not be pushy.
@@morganqorishchi8181 shout out to mum breaking it down.
I still love that. Consent is super important, but a lot of people do feel awkward or nervous just asking verbally, so this can really help a lot of people.
you can also just ask them! it’s nice to be direct and honest. if they say no, it’s alright! and it’s only awkward if you make it awkward, but if they’re nice people they’ll probably won’t make a big deal about it.
this made me realize that this probably dominoed into Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother (and The Playbook).
When I saw _The Playbook_ I automatically thought of _Hitch_
Except the Playbook is manipulation tho, those are plays to get laid, Hitchs rules are plays to get love
I have to speak my peace , there’s nothing wrong with dating coaches . I think the bad ones get a lot of attention. But some men genuinely don’t know how to talk to women or talk without being creepy . I’ve literally told guys hey don’t start off with sex just have a normal conversation. Because some men see women as obstacles or at least talking to them
I’ll never forget when me, my mom, and brother walked like 40min in a snowstorm to watch Hitch in theaters. It’s a good movie but idk why she made us do that😂😂
This is sending me
Glad you survived to tell the tale
You know why.
But why tho? 😅
One of my exes frequently watches pick up artists on UA-cam/TikTok and has some very toxic views on dating and women. Everyone he's ever dated or met has ultimately blocked him (including me now) and he couldn't understand why and would try to use the techniques to trick people into staying with him. He couldn't understand that there is no secret technique. Being consistently genuine will serve someone much better than constant games and tactics. I do like Hitch's message in that regard
But why would his negative views on women matter if your ex is clearly a gay time traveler dating you, Napoleon Bonaparte, the 19th Century's most feared and revered Emperor and dictator?
@@MidlifeCrisisJoe Dictator or not, Napoleon has standards!
Jeez, I wonder how long it'll take for him to realize he's the only common denominator (if he ever does)
@kshamwhizzle yeah that's unfortunately the VERY safe bet
But what if his genuine self is also a piece of shit?
The 90’s had horrible books like The Rules and Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I always figured it span out of things like that.
I think dating was kind of bogged down to that at the time ( I can't really verify since I was just a kid then lol), but it seemed to all come down to "women are like this and men are like this", which just undermines the complexities of human interaction. I guess its just an eternal struggle for people to just understand that men and women shouldn't be categorized so broadly
The Rules were noting more than a PUA for women.
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus wasn't horrible. It was about explaining the psychological and communication differences between how men and women interact. Many of the observations in the book are still discussed today, just focusing on one side. Whenever you see women explaining how men should try to understand women and react how women want, that's half of the book. The entire goal was to get both sides to recognize the communication styles and meet in the middle.
The 90s were OBSESSED with gender
Hitch is one of the few romcoms I can actually stand to watch because it has a level of self-awareness and intuitive nuance that so many other movies don't. I find most romcoms, unless they're deliberately trying to be satirical or ridiculous, to be really toxic for people's perception of relationships. Romcoms twist women's perception about healthy and realistic relationships like porn messes with men's perception of healthy and realistic sex.
The saddes part of your comment is that watching porn or romcom can change your perception, like, is a fcking movie, that is just meant to entertaing you, thats it, nothing more nothing less. Its fcking ridiculous that somthing like that can happen, do you seriusly not watch romcom because it doesn't have selfawareness?? Come on, it doesnt has to, it just for you to say at the end, that was cute, period, not for you to think too much about it, fck, all movies are just for that
@@martinacosta3821 calm down, dude. Overexposure to pop culture conventions tends to change peoples perceptions on a broad scale. It's just a reality of the human condition. Why do you think the manosphere crisis is a thing in the first place? It's not like it manifested itself in a vacuum. You're not better than op or anyone else just because you're wise enough to watch stuff containing toxic undertones without internalizing it. What's wrong with preferring to not watch it in the first place?
@@AD-dg3zz sorry if i sounded angry, i am not, it just annoying that i have read so many comments about " yeah, this movie is telling people this or that" and i am here like, what?? Why are you wasting so many brain cell on a movie?? A movie is exacty for you to turn your brain off and forget the world for a few hours, thats it, why complicate things? And i wasnt saying that you should watch romcom or any other, it was more to the fact that it actually bothered you stuff like that. Am yes, i am aware that movies affect people, but its should me more on the side like for example the misconception that shooting in the leg is safe, you know what i mean? That as far as influence should go
@@martinacosta3821 calm down, it's not that deep
@@ninjanibba4259 your comment make no sense given my comment my friend
I was actually thinking about Hitch recently and I’m glad you guys did a retrospective. It’s aged better than it should have but also in a way that looking back some parts are dated but that’s what gives the movie its charm. I remember watching this as a teenager and for me it was the RARE romantic comedy with POC leads so I didn’t exactly ‘pick up’ on some of the nuances and pitfalls the film was navigating through although as I got older and have rewatched the film recently and a lot of what Terrence says makes sense. Although now as a Queer Adult I REALLY wish there was a film that went down a similar path Hitch did it would’ve made the last few years a lot easier. And if QC or anyone else has Queer Dating advice that’s healthy please let me know.
Is it that different, and if it is, should it be? Hitch is about confidence/being yourself, non manipulation, chemistry and basically luck.
I'd love a Queer Hitch that helps those who struggled with comphet and came out late find love and community
@@Khwerz well yes and no, historically queer love represented in manner of a romantic comedy a La Hitch has been something Hollywood has been…not great at for reasons too long to list. So while the lessons of Hitch are universal and could be grafted to a film with queer leads it’s having a queer perspective is like the secret ingredient that helps it stand out. A compliment rather than a copy.
@@juliannehannes11 I’d like that especially as someone who was a late bloomer.
@@ayindestevens6152 list them
Thanks for discussing this!
As a straight guy myself who is a bit socially awkward, I've been doing a lot more research over the past few years on pick-up artistry and how creepy it's become, as well as the incel community, which I would say is even worse than the pick-up artist community. One thing I will say is that while don't generally like to call men simps just for respecting women, I do think you have a point about putting women on a pedestal. In fact, I feel that a lot of people who are incels start out out as being people who go above and beyond for women who they like in ways that make it obvious that they're putting them on a pedestal and not treating them as equals. Guys who do that with women they are interested in often expect the woman to then become interested in them, but get turned down, and extremely upset about being turn down. For certain guys, it seems that that happening to them repeatedly has the potential to cause severe mental health problems that ultimately give them an incel mindset. I wouldn't be surprised if some incels became incels also in part because of buying into pick-up advice that they were convinced was scientifically sound and not succeeding in getting the results they wanted from following that advice. Pick-up artists and incels seem to often have a distorted view of biological determinism and evolution, so if a guy follows certain pick-up advice and things don't go how he was told they would go, he may be more prone to becoming an incel, believing himself to be an evolutionary failure.
I’m glad you spoke up about this. Thank you for your story. And thank you for having a mind open enough to question the ethics of the tips and tricks. Please stay loud and don’t let the people get away with bullying men by calling them simps for respecting women. That term is honestly just the WORST
Yh i cant speak for other women, but i have experienced that Type of treatment from Guys who thought that treating me Like "a Lady" (their words, Not Mine) would get me to Date them.
Thing about that is:
A: it becomes obvious quite quickly that the Guy has No interest in me. He has this picture in His head of an ideal that doesnt exist, and He is projecting on me. Often, there is No interest in actually learning what i am Like. A good example is ordering food or Drinks in Bars. Ive Had Guys who were taken aback when i ordered guiness and Not some "girly" stuff. And who got almost angry when i suggested that i pay the Bill. If me offering to pay for YOUR Food leads to several minutes of pouting, what will Happen, If there is an actual issue? Other stuff is more subtle, but If you constantly get the Impression that someone is trying to court someone who's Not you, and turning stuff you say into issues they can "fix"... That will Turn me Off. I want someone who's interested in me, Not the girl from His favorite movie.
B: it mostly went Hand in Hand with Putting other women down. Telling me i was "Not Like other Girls", often making fun of other Girls Makeup and Style and whatever they could think of on the Spot. Im an Immigrant, so it also gets this creepy Dimension when someone tells me im "Not Like british Girls". Heres the Thing: talking Bad about random women on the street isnt attractive. All it does is make me Wonder what you will say about me once im gone. All those "compliments" means nothing, cuz once they dont get what they want, they will probably start trashing me too.
@@chelseashurmantine8153
My pleasure.
Yeah, I don't generally like to use words like simp, though it's mainly because of how misused it is. The manosphere, at least in my experience, seems to use it for just about any dude who isn't an "alpha male" or is otherwise not dominant enough.
@@annabeinglazy5580
Yep.
Part of what angers me me about those guys is that they think they are owed intimacy and such from women who they are "nice" to, like if they shower a woman with gifts, yet they also get upset with women who are prostitutes. Either way one spins it, there isn't necessarily much of a difference between prostitution and and expecting that being "nice" to someone by giving them lots of expensive gifts and other similar forms of being "nice" has to lead to a sexual relationship.
@kshamwhizzle
Yeah, I've seen way too many women with guys who aren't particularly tall to buy into the idea that a guy is somehow a failure if he isn't a certain height.
And yes, I see putting women or even men on a pedestal as simping, as well as objectification, and to me, it's unhealthy for both men and women. It's how I think the term "simping" should be used. It's far too often used for just about any guy who is liberal or left-leaning and treat women with equality.
Also, on a note related to putting women on pedestal, I've recently come to understand that it isn't exactly true that most women who are into men dislike guys who are nice. Rather, the issue is that guys who try to be nice often do it in ways that put women on a pedestal, like by always agreeing with them, getting them lots of gifts, being overly chivalrous, etc. Those are things where if someone does them excessively, it often becomes obvious, the person isn't really being themself and just wants to get into their pants. Now, is there anything wrong with desiring to get into somebody's pants? No, not if both people involved are adults. However, I don't think the average person wants their romantic partner to basically put on an act all just to get laid and if that is indeed their only motive for their behavior, it means there's a good chance they may stop being so nice once they've gotten what they want
I loved watching this movie when I was younger. It has a nice lighthearted and laid back feel overall. It’s great to go back and analyze things as a man. Especially with all these alpha male expert quotes and advice everywhere. I really enjoyed the essay. Love this channel!
That was * chef's kiss *
You are part of the healing in the world - thank you for existing and sharing this video!! 💖
this might be the nicest comment I've ever received 🥺🥺 Thanks so much! I really appreciate your kind words
@@QualityCulture wow really?? Well, it's my pleasure! And I'm SURE it's the first of many 💗 😊 🙏
yes, I agree. we need more video like this. Pop Culture Detective is another good YT user for these kinds of analyses
Just discovered your channel. keep up the awesome work!
I love this movie. Honestly probably my favorite rom com of all time.
Feels vindicating to have you analyze the more dubious parts of it, and show how is actually had a very genuine and positive message to share. Albert Brenneman is a great man.
From a woman's perspective, Hitch was a great romantic comedy that was very entertaining. It had all the criteria of a successful movie in the romantic comedy genre. Did we know it would foreshadow the state of dating in the early 2020's? No. This video does a great job of pointing that out and also points out dating culture/singlehood and the sensibilities of men before the popularity and pervasiveness of dating apps. Even though a lot of men were socially awkward, this movie premiered at a time when people HAD to communicate with one another in-person more often than not.
Great video, also, I hope you found love! You have a great smile and your video essays are on-point!
Really great video! the pacing was great and you really made your point super well!
Super-thoughtful analysis! Thanks
Wow!!! This is the first time I've seen one of your videos (and I've never seen Hitch!). I genuinely loved every moment of this video and I am walking away from it feeling like I learned something significant AND I am fully entertained as well. Thank you for that. It doesn't happen often. I'll be back! 🤗👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed it 😊
Extremely well put. Beautiful breakdown. ✨✨✨
Ive never had this subject broken down to me like you did in this video prior to having watched it, I cant say that it would help me in the future but it could help
Loved the vid! I liked the nuanced take you gave regarding pick up artists. Indeed it's all about true human connection in the end. Hitch was strangely ahead of its time lol
This was very insightful and informative!
Learned about myself in this video🙏🏾 everything was super well put, love this movie and this video
Hitch shows guys trying to Date and Know women.
Not bonk, boink or swoop.
Get to know.
Great job on this video. 👏🏿👏🏿. Great breakdown on Hitch and dating life.
What I love about this channel is it embraces the movies I grow up loving and introduces me to other good movies that I haven't seen, old or new.
One of those movies that you keep forgetting but you then remember you love it 100% when youre reminded of it or see it randomly in your UA-cam feed
This video could have been an hour with how much was presented. Great stuff.
While it’s totally fine (and healthy) to seek advice for dating, the problem lies in finding advice for men that isn’t inherently sexist or misogynistic in some way. They’re guided to think of sex/women’s affection as a prize for their performances. To trick them or to think that women need to be “hacked” into liking them or often that women are just after money or some other superficial “alpha male” trait. Rarely is the focus around seeing them as whole people who want to be respected, engaged with, and teaching men healthy ways of socializing and maintaining relationships.
Women are often taught from childhood their value is in being attractive to men - to attract men by being good servants to them, to please them, to be accommodating and presentable and interesting for them. This all plays into upholding toxic heterosexual norms that prevent people from finding fulfilling, equal relationships
A lot of the skills needed for a good relationship, or to be attractive, are generally skills for life and platonic relationships too: good hygiene, being able to carry good conversation by actively listening and engaging with the person, being thoughtful and generous, etc.
I’m holding out hope that more can provide that sort of guidance so we break the cycle of generations treating one another as foreign specimens that need to be studied and “figured out”.
We’re all just humans who want to feel respected, safe, and cared for. Learn to be a good friend to the opposite sex first and you will learn to be a good partner too.
Yes. I also think that some of that sexist advice and guys buying into it can contribute to certain guys become incel-types. Pick-up artist types give a lot of pseudoscientific advice to guys and the guys who buy into it probably think that following that advice will definitely give them the results they desire, so they become incels because they don't get those results and therefore conclude that it must be that they're evolutionary failures. Ultimately, pseudoscientific pick-up advice is often very creepy and doesn't promote meaningful relationships, and is bad for everyone, including men, especially men who are already mentally unwell.
Also, with regards to women being told that their value is in how attractive they are to guys, the thing that angers me about that the most women also are often judged for dressing in ways that society deems to be too alluring and such. It's very confusing to me
I hope this gets pinned because u did dissect this issue and summarised it well.
You did ignore what men are 'taught' though. It's also useful to think about differences between sexes in countries which favor equality. Many differences remain quite consistent. Men and women have different hormones coursing through their veins. Men and women have supplemented cross-sex hormones for different reasons over the decades and can cite specific changes in their personalities and behaviors as they have done so. I am referring to transgenderism as well as the common usage of cross-sex hormones in the body-building & fitness industry (it is common knowledge that men and women supplement male hormones, but less known is that both typically will use female hormones as well to counteract hormonal imbalance-related side effects). With this evidence it is hardly appropriate to think men and women as 'blank slate' animals that are conditioned via behaviorist principles (nurture over nature), but rather products of complex chemistry determined by genetic variation. Of course hormones are also heavily influenced by life stressors and environmental triggers, but these influences operate within the genetic blueprint's limitations.
@@bdonovable
In addition to that, I bet that the environment also affects hormones
@@technoloverish Agreed. It does. I acknowledged that in the last sentence of my original comment. Cortisol (the so-called stress hormone) is part of the complex pathway that synthesizes Androgens (testosterone/estrogen) Shunting in the pathway can cause over or under production of differing sex hormones. The environmental effects are limited by genetics still---it will not change testicles to ovaries or visa versa.
Good video. I lost the count of how many times I watched this movie maybe around like 40-50 times. At some point I caught myself watching this movie one week straight each day. I always revisit this movie
Good video bro! Really enjoyed hitch when I was younger. And I always love when people address dangerous topics like pick up artists, but also try to see the perspective of people in the opposite position
This was great!, thank u!
THANK YOU! The world needs this video * - *
I gotta watch this movie again! Havent since preteen years. Great breakdown!
I know it's a romantic comedy, but I never liked that after Sara apologises to Hitch, and he refuses, only for her to mess with him until they inevitably get together.
Hey it's you again! Yeah I didn't really like that either. Hitch is the movie that solidified my disdain for games. If a guy can't be genuine I didn't want him.
In Sara’s defense she had no idea Hitch had his epiphany with Albert and Allegra so she went with what she thought was the best option at the time. It’s not the best way to get the characters back together but I’m open to alternatives!
@@ayindestevens6152 interesting
Every stable relationship founded on deception is not :P but still many average guys (with the bad qualities of both Hitch and Alfred) have to "act" more sociable in the beginning than they truly are for ANY relationship to even start. "Would you have noticed him otherwise?" Nope. Not everybody gets the girl. Just gotta be happy with yourself anyway, spend time on what you like.
I gotta give it to you for this one. Damn good video... Damn good...
I LOVE this movie. Its in my top ten. Its endearing and grey. Great video!
Yeah I was pretty surprised how well it held up actually. Feels like a movie from a bygone era tbh
@@QualityCulture isn't it a bygone era?
you making me feel old af rn 😳 lmao
@@QualityCulture who me? 😁
i haven't thought about this movie in a long time and I used to love it. the plot flows rather smoothly and I do prefer to think Hitch as a dating coach rather than a pickup artist.
I like to see it as a dating coach learning to break and tear down his toxic “pickup artist” view to full accept a relationship again
Really enjoyed this.
I love hitch! The way he dealt with helping others form relationships was so healthy and wholesome. Then I see people like donovan sharpe come out with a program called "build the perfect woman" and its kinda sickening to see that.
Great Video👌🔥
Nice details.
'Date Coaching' for men isn't inherently bad. It comes across disingenuous because they're receiving the 'training' much later in life, whereas women typically just receive it from birth lol (hygiene & primping, dressing for your body, being graceful, conversation skills, reading a room, etc.)
What's troubling is how often it's paired with unmasked misogyny. The idea that it's a 'game' and you want the women to effectively 'lose.' There's got to be a core of self-hatred to that, right?
Sounds like some self-hate is involved.
Totally. And low self-esteem as well
Women don't receive training. It's not "natural" to us either, stop spreading these lies. Having been diagnosed as being on the ASD and having NO guidance from anyone in my family, your comment rings hollow.
I thought the idea of calling dating a game is winners are the people who find romance and losers are the ones who don't. I never heard of dating as a game as in when men win, women loose.
@@Mr.YasQueen that’s fair, but what the post is pointing out is that this is not how a lot of this misogynistic dating advice frames the game. They frame it more as an “us against them” game and the “us” (usually men in this case) need to learn how to get over on the “them” (generally women) to win.
_Hitch_ isn't even pre-Slap when you've got Will or Alex slapping Albert (Kevin James). Anyway this flick holds up pretty well overall.
Thank you. I think EVERY man (the good ones) should be speaking up LOUDLY about why the manosphere is not cool. Thank you dude. Thank you. I have lost faith in men over the last few months because it seems like the only men I hear anymore are the monsters. My dad calls them “loud mouths” but it is so much worse than that to a woman hearing them. Thank you again.
As a man, I can see your point and I can understand a similar level of frustration. For me, I speak up whenever I see some BS. Ive even put my own nephew on blast, for him asking for a waitresses phone number while she was getting his order. I can go on, but I think I made my point. I don't consider myself a "good man", just someone who tries to be conscientious.
I do understand why you're starting to feel that way about men though. It feels like why don't the good men say anything about these monsters? If you could indulge me for a moment.
I feel the same way about the perception of good policy, not being "good politics". With all of the suffering in just the US, why don't we do anything about it. It's because people, in general, look out for their own self interests, and if it's not directly affecting them, they don't care.
How many times have we seen Republicans do an about-face on gay marriage once they discovered they had a gay daughter/son?
Democrats only signal better policy. Outside of these last 3~4 months, all Democrats have done is give lip service to better healthcare, and that the rich need to pay more. Without doing either.
All that to say, please try your best not to associate all men with the manosphere. We're not all bad.
Kinda funny over the past few years I’ve kinda lost faith in women. I think that both the manosphere pick up artists and the feminists have problems as neither side will confront their own problems and will also deny that the opposite gender has any problem whatsoever.
yep this movie was one of the few romcoms i liked
while i just had issues connecting with ppl in general in highschool, i never believed in the whole secrets of dating myth that bros try to push and this movie played a part in my learning of that
You should talk about this new UA-camr who goes by the name Social Animal. He's great! Men and women like his content alike. Great video!
I remember seeing the trailer for this movie before watching Spider-Man 2 every time then I finally watched it and it’s a really nice comfort movie
I had this movie on a PSP disk
The problem is that there is a "way" for men to hack the system, (odd terminology, I know, but stay with me). What most men find while following these modern dating coaches is that they will get laid a lot easier by following their techniques, (I've experienced this myself xD) but the problem is that when they try to have a meaningful relationship, they've made their houses on sand, rather than building their houses on a solid foundation-or a rock. There's a way that seems right to man, but it only leads to more suffering, I've been there.
3:21 This guy in his minion hat and goggles TOTALLY looks like a badass and not someone I could shove into a locker back in the 9th grade.
Thanks for the vid! You’re right “past a certain point” it crumbles because both parties start to get vulnerable and they need to trust each other.
I read The Game. They don’t learn social skills. They learn social manipulation. I negged someone who negged me without even knowing what negging was and he spun it on me like I was the antagonist. Be kind and have healthy boundaries instead.
that guy that keeps talking about "escalating the situation" is giving serious Denis Reynolds vibes
i love this video so much.
I enjoyed watching Hitch. Seeing the pickup artist trying to help his clients. Ended up the client helping him out with relationship.
One of my favorite rom coms ever. Severly underrated
If you want an "accidental companion video" that's not too heavy but still substantive, Todd In The Shadows made an episode of his Trainwreckords series recently (ie post-Slap) examining the record Will Smith made around this time, which Mr. Shadows makes a great case contains tracks that had been intended to be in the Hitch OST.
Thanks for reminding me why I loved this movie so much lol.
I e always viewed this movie as Hitch being the writer/director of the movie. For example, the set up situations are the same as a writer orchestrating a meet-cute in a regular rom com. And hitch’s realization at the end is a critique on how rom-coms are unrealistic and true love sometimes just happens naturally
Great vid
You nailed a lot of the reasons why this movie did well culturally. It beat down the toxic mentality and revealed that self improvement, confidence, and taking risks are truly great. Ultimately, having an actual life, being a little exciting, and being genuine with people goes much farther.
And who would want to interact with and live a life where you manipulate people and lie to get what you want? Doesn't it feel wrong? Absolutely, effort is needed. Absolutely, make moves, demonstrate your attraction and love for another person. This is scary...but it's doable. You'll be a better human being and find success with people you'll actually like.
I love your videos
Great video. My perspective is that Hitch was right about getting the introduction. If it were possible, the socially awkward guys would do it. Hitch wasn't chasing love at that time. So his focus was different. Liking her did throw his business into chaos but his goal wasn't manipulation. It was introduction and then he let the rest happen naturally.
Before there was Neill Strauss and the PUA's of his time there was Ross Jeffreys, I read his first book, Jeffreys does make an appearance in The Game
They should kept that deleted scene in.
i liked this analysis of this movie! i too love a cheesy romcom and i've seen this movie like 5 times even though it's far from my favorite. but yea you explained why it kinda bothers me but i still like it. i think will smith does a good job coming across as so charming and non threatening in this role and that really helps prevent him from coming across as a villain
Dude, a great film you can watch is "What Love is," a great underrated film.
My favorite romcom ever this movie still hits home😊
the only line i remember in the movie that stuck with me since childhood was
love is my life
NO, LOVE IS YOUR JOB
I just realized the first clip was will Smith Chris rocking someone
Could you make a video on how to analyze a film?
O:01 you're right Hitch (slap) really was ahead of its time 🤣
I just realized that Hitch was a precursor to Nathan Fielder's The Rehearsal
Nice vid
It's super refreshing to see content like that. Empathy and thoughtfulness, make space for reflection. Thanks.
Glad you enjoyed it!
This video is so good damn. In this sea of redpill content who would imagine this movie from the 2000s would have such a better outlook about the same things being discussed today
Randomly clicked on this. Good video essay.
I love hitch. I watch hitch and vanilla sky as my two shining examples of love. One a dream love that can’t be reality and the reality that love makes no sense. But both showing the most important thing that every human needs. The uncomfortable truth over the comforting lie.
Honestly, I kinda wonder what was more helpful/successful.
What “dating coaches” told/taught their clients, the clients just getting more confidence, or if it was just that the guys would eventually end up talking to more people which if they went from talking to 0 women to even just 1-2 that really increases your odds infinitely.
“Putting them on a pedestal is just another way of othering them” omg !!!!!
Mystery looks like a character plucked straight from Zoolander
All you need is confidence and respect. There, saved you time and money
Cool movie, I might actually watch it.
Yeahhh yeahhh I've been hoping someone makes this video b/c fr all its 2000's gender essentialism, I always thought Hitch was a good movie with a warm heart towards the idea of people being able to connect if we can figure out how to give each other more of a chance. I always think about that scene where Hitch is trying to get Albert to 'get over' Allegra and he reads him for filth. The reality is that social convention will overpower people's ability to feel compassion and connection to other people, and often you need someone else who is able to break that convention around you to be able to feel that connection. A lot of basic social skills *are* hard to learn, there truly is no one way all people are inherently without compounding factors, and learning to sus out and nurture the parts of yourself that facilitate connecting to people -- something most of us inherently want to do -- can be hard and is something we all deserve a little help in. Out of any random movie, I think Hitch is the one I would like to see remade in spirit, I think there's a real conversation to be had about how disconnected we're all becoming amids ossifying social conventions.
Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes and yes. Thank you. ❣️
Amazing
hitch wasn't a pick up artist at all. he was trying to get guys relationships that were long term and meaningful. Thats why he punches that guy who tried to hire him so he could sleep with a girl.
So he punches him for trivial ass reasons?
@@mdtisthebest6249 so you think treating women like sex toys is trivial? Good to know
@@mdtisthebest6249one, he didn’t punch him, he put him in an arm bar. Two, he did it because the client tried to strong arm him after he refused to work with him.
@@cepahreinholt8710 Do you think that women that go to the club with the intention of getting laid is a bad thing?
@@Macca-95 not if they're straitfoward and not manipulative. Sex between 2 consenting adults is not a bad thing. Manipulation and lies to have sex is bad. If you just want sex. Go see a sex worker or someone on the same page. Don't pretend you want something else and manipulate someone looking for a relatiolnship.
I think Hitch said it best when he talks about giving men the confidence, and the knowledge to help Women get out of their own way, and then see his clients for the loving, caring, and nice guys that they are. Paraphrasing. Yeah he's got al these plans and flow charts, but what it really comes down too is helping his clients get past all the social defenses that women have to develope so that they can see the man.
After that if it is love, then it is love. I also liked in the speed dating scene that even as his world is not crashing down around him, he's still defending his clients.
Opening the video with Will Smith slapping Kevin James is hilarious 😂
It took me a bit too long to realize this wasn’t Hitchcock and that’s why he wasn’t doing superhero things
Ive been with the same woman for 10 years, since my early 20s. I'm really glad I just missed the era of tinder and puas because I think with today's toxic dating environment I could've definitely fallen into these traps.
"Breakn all the rules" the same way
Yes I am a big fan
I wish you had said sooner about that pickup artist guy going back on his advice as harmful. That seems to be skipped. Skipped or unmentioned. It should be included up front in his introduction.
Great video, interesting comparison with Hitch an Pick Up artists.
If you fancy some feedback, I felt like it got a bit redundant in the end with rephrasing points made just moments before. That could trim a few minutes off that video ;) but maybe that's just me. Anyways, keep it up!
It would be interesting see the opposite of this where a woman is picked mainly for her personality . Not a remake and not Shallow Halloween because he had to have a magic spell put on him.