Indian Incels Online
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- Опубліковано 13 чер 2024
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0:00 pre-intro
1:00 intro
3:33 defining inceldom
9:46 the manosphere
16:43 indian incels
27:53 avaneesh and inceldom online
38:43 words of advice/outro - Комедії
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25:51Hey the laws getting misused by "disgruntled" Women is an actual occurrence. Entire family commits suicide cause of the social shaming faced by them due to fake charges. I think it deserved a little nuance rather than blatantly generalizing it.
@@anirudhoraon8658 Can you post a citation rather than this ambiguous "entire family commits suicide" claim? It sounds a little far fetched.
This is an excerpt from Vox
"More often, dowry related-abuses are filed under a law that prevents domestic abuse: in 2015, more than 113,000 women reported abuse by their husbands or in-laws, and 7,646 deaths were classified as related to dowry disputes. That is nearly 21 women killed every day by their husbands or in-laws because their families could not meet the dowry demands."
Dowries are illegal in India. But families - including mine - still expect them.
By Kavya Sukumar Feb 6, 2017, 8:00am EST
I was going to follow until I found out that you sold out to spyware Gx. Smh u should be ashamed
Most indian women don't work meaning they need to rely on their partners more. How can Indians be incels if they arranged marriages???
@@anirudhoraon8658 Got any sources on 'entire family commits suicide'
Because that's fucking ridiculous
One big factor that you didn't touch in the video: The people who emigrated abroad have the idea of "India" stuck in their head as it was in the 90s. Its been over 20-25 years now. The "culture" and "traditions" that they have imparted to their children is 20-25 years old now. India itself has evolved. Of course they still carries regressive elements with them, but on the whole, the 50+ year olds that I see are way more progressive in India than the 50+ year olds I know who live abroad (anecdotal not empirical).
Another point: Structure. A high school incel is still "redeemable" because they have a clear, defined structure in their life. They go to school everyday, have opportunities to interact with people their age. regardless of their dating success. They have projects, homework, exams etc. But once they graduate, life is self-paced. Whether, they study further, job, run their own business, its all on their own terms. The opportunities to interact with people their own age plummet.
this is so true!! applies to Pakistani/South Asian parents and their expectations of children too
this is so real. i used to always attribute my parents conservatism to indian culture but being exposed to non diasporic indian culture via online creators and discussions and even news and data shows that my parents are just conservative cuz their connection to india is one from 30 years ago.
That's an interesting point! I never would have thought of that so thank you
So real. My parents are in their 50s but we moved to the UK from India in 2002 when my parents were already in their 30s (I was 4). They grew up in a big city and we visit basically every year, so we're still very connected to India. It was bizarre to me to see how old fashioned the parents of the desi kids at my school were. Some of them wouldn't let their daughters wear shorts/skirts, not even in the house if a man was around. Meanwhile my female cousins in India wear shorts and stuff all the time, as do I.
There was also the bizarre reality that the city I live in here in the UK with a population of 300k has more gurudwaras than the city my parents grew up in (population 8 million). Turns out the Sikhs in the UK didn't heed the fact that caste is supposed to be banned within the religion, and ban people from certain gurudwaras here depending on caste. I've heard about Sikh boys being bullied here because of caste. There are honour killings based on Sikh caste. This was so difficult for my mum to comprehend. We're Hindu but my mum's best friend growing up in India is Sikh. In her 32 years in India she had never even heard of the Sikh castes. There were only 2 gurudwaras in the city, one either side of the river, purely for ease of access. It wasn't caste-based at all.
Rose’s point about rehabilitation being confused with reintegration into the harmed groups/relationships REALLY made everything click for me. I’ve always struggled to articulate that point to others holy shit
Ro is one of the most brilliant people on UA-cam, hope she has a long and successful career doing whatever makes her happy
I know!! I’m so glad they collaborated.
@@ville__he’s literally made a video with colleen in it?? in what world would he support colleen lol
@@issalune It’s just a new f*cking annoying bot, I’ve seen this spam on multiple other youtubers’ accounts.
@@issalunethis guy is spamming this everywhere abt different youtubers he posted one on a gabi belle video as well
What is intelligent, repeating colorism, people of color, propaganda nonsense?
The fact that not even 15 percent of Indian women are in work force, caste ,religion and racism towards north east indian ,are just add on the misery. Source for stats -Center for Monitoring the Indian Economy
that's also one of the reason. I travel from time to time and I find literally every country easy to get dates, except India. The main reason is women aren't in the workforce as much as even the countries that are worse developed than India. So a lot of men in work force find it hard to get dates which leads to inceldom (perhaps?). There might be cultural factors as well. But incels don't think too deep about that. Their logic is -> I don't get dates = women are chasing after chads. Not that women aren't even there to date someone lol.
@@youtubesucks2755I think another reason is lack of interaction from a young age between the genders, like my parents country had all girls schools and all boys schools from a young age and it’s easy to view the other sex as a different species and feel disallusioned and incel behaviour ensues. It’s not all of the factor but it may contribute??
women in India are expected to get an education so they have good credentials, which will make them look like ideal wife candidates. once they get married, they’re culturally forced out of their careers and into the life of housewife
@@itsanu1420 maybe a little bit but I never had problems with that outside of India. Even in India, I have had female friends but it's the lack of options once you move out of your parent's house. The ratio is in favor of women.
@@youtubesucks2755 the cultural factor is this: dating culture within India is very, very new. The reality is the vast majority of parents of current Gen Z had arranged marriages and expect their children to have the same. Here's an example - my aunt and uncle started to look for suitable guys to meet my cousin for arranged marriage meetings. My cousin then had to come clean and say that she had been in a relationship for 4 years. I come from a very progressive family by Indian standards, my cousin grew up in Goa, has been able to wear shorts her whole life, goes out clubbing, is even able to drink with family, even our grandparents. We are very much outliers and her parents definitely would be accepting, and in fact did despite him being from a different part of India and having a different cultural upbringing. Even still she felt the need to conceal her relationship from her parents until she had to reveal it.
If you go to certain spots in cities you will see couples on dates who are very clearly doing so in secret. That's not because they're cheating, it's because their parents wouldn't approve.
Anything that distracts from education is seen as negative in India. Children need to go to school and college, even extra-curriculars like sports are discouraged unless your family is financially secure enough to give you a backup plan. All your time should be spent studying, not wasting time dating.
There's also the fact that if your marriage is not your first relationship, there's a chance you're no longer "pure" to prospective matches. Both parties are expected to be virgins until marriage, but of course for women that is harder to conceal in case they get pregnant etc. So men want access to women sexually, but most women are not willing to take that risk (as well as due to the fact that they just want to avoid creeps).
What’s terrifying is that I recently watched this video on the r*pe culture in India, and everyone in this one village - women, teens and men - keep blaming the victim.
Things need to change…
Link the video. Also what r u talking of rape culture dude. Like grow up. India do not promote or teach men to rape women. Otherwise you would have seen lots of attacks on foreign soil by Indians also. We have a severe problem of religious war. And that is a different discussion however if you don't know the history then don't just put lables.
@@ang4065 ua-cam.com/video/Pgom8LRF8hQ/v-deo.htmlsi=Ly1Dx065F6p67BRR lol why are you in denial? This video itself was made by Indians trying to raise awareness.
@@ang4065 why are you in denial? 😂Even Indians say the same thing. You can look it up just by typing R*pe Culture India. The channel is called The Quint
@@ang4065 ignore, tolerate, and lack of punishment do promote that culture whether you teach it or not.
@@favlam1408 Rape happens everywhere in this world. That means that you r also promoting it. I mean like you guys r grown adults and the funny thing is you guys r comparing different regions of the world that have different past and religious issues and political issues and r using a same lens for judgement. I mean it's like saying that all people in the world needs to be 6 feet tall and have sharp features. But how can you expect that for let's say Chinese, or Japanese or Koreans etc. It's funny.
I will always love pointing out the absolute irony of incels using the “red pill” analogy since it’s from The Matrix, a movie famously made by two trans feminist sisters (the Wachowskis)
wait till you find out the term incel was imvented by a woman to describe HERSELF and her female experience of being unable to get a partner.
You said it first but I was thinking the exact same thing, elena! Sickening behavior on these dudes part but highly comical when you step back and think about the WACHOWSKI sisters, but that’s information that might take some light research which would take time away from the Incel of it all…😂🙄
One time Elon & that Trump daughter used this analogy & one of the sisters told them to fck off 🤣
True, but the Matrix doesn't belong to the Wachowskis. Just like Star Wars doesn't belong to George Lucas. They are pieces of public art. Sure, they brought it forth, and may 'own' it, but art belongs to anyone that wishes to interpret it in whatever form they choose. By the way, the Matrix was created when the Wachowskis were different people, and the concept originally comes from Alice in Wonderland.
@@trollking99 Its still funny though lol. Especially cause they wrote the original Matrix to be a trans allegory. There's a reason the red pill was red, when estrogen used to be coloured red...
i go to the same university as avaneesh and i was so shocked to see that it took them SO long to expel him (i CANNOT believe that he even got accepted in the first place). thank you for making this video and for sharing your perspective !!
unrelated but i love your handle
SUNNY PFP
Why? Because of any misconduct?
@@arrow2380He conducted several battery and stalking on campus within two weeks and the police got him
I went to high school with him and he was known to be a degenerate. I’m not surprised his tendencies led him to being arrested for stalking.
breeding ground for incels is my new favorite oxymoron
That's actually pretty funny
Let's keep the internet language and let's call it "incel spawn point"
First cast system, honour culture, love Jihad and now incels… I feel sorry for women in India, hopefully things change.
isnt love jihad an islamophobic conspiracy theory or like is it a proper problem in India
"Love jihad" as a real phenomenon or as a conspiracy theory that ruins interfaith couples' right to live freely?
true
love jihad isnt real
Are you pakistani? 😂😂
Haven't watched it yet but definitely will as soon as I get free time. I'm glad this topic is being taken up in Indian spheres. As an Indian living in India, I've seen a lot of incel and misogynistic behaviours and mindsets in my male classmates, and it never fails to make me feel even more scared and sickened.
Pls complain to your teacher or your parents......
Sadly these teenage men ( especially in this Alpha sigma society) are scary.... They all just blame women in everything. Let's be aware of our own surroundings....
@@Aradhaya45720 unfortunately it never goes far- but yea, you can try. indian society tends to allow such abuse to a certain point, cuz most think its just a small complaint or whatnot
they start it off as a joke too. its so weird catching up with old classmates who are now tate devotees
@@harsheh fr
Yes, good point! It starts as a 'harmless' joke, and I see that with my fellow high school classmates, but it really does affect your mind and get serious before long.
This was incredibly eye opening. I noticed some similarities with Latin American incel culture.
I'm Mexican and I've helped in raising my 13 year old nephew. The rise of the exposure to manosphere amongst teens/tweens has been concerning. Mexican culture, immigrant culture, and Chicano culture have been plagued with similar issues of colorism, familial preference for boys, and "traditional" masculinity. I'm concerned for the mental health of young brown boys. I'm also concerned for young brown girls and lgbt+ kids that have had contact with manosphere rhetoric. Femicide, homophobic violence, and human trafficking have always affected brown girls and lgbt+ people at higher rates.
While there are overall cultural differences, a major marker of incel culture in Latin countries is the use of dark humor to spread ideas. Satire, dark comedy, and a "no one is safe" mentality is what defines a lot of Latin communities. Criticism is equated with sensitivity and the inability to take a joke. Its really difficult for women and lgbt+ people to speak up without backlash. Its even more difficult to seek justice from violence in traditional Mexican towns and immigrant communities.
I don't have a conclusion or connecting thought, I just wanted to include observations.
This is really interesting, thanks for sharing a perspective from a different side of the world. It's pretty sad that this is a global issue.
Sounds like your nephew is lucky to have you! I hope he doesn't get swept up in it. My family is (mostly) white, and I know I worried for a while about my younger brothers falling into similar pitfalls, too. Thankfully, they're becoming very empathetic young men. I think a big part of that was not sugar coating certain issues at a fairly young age and keeping the door open for communication. Of course, every kid/teen is different and it sounds like you already have good instincts
As a Mexican American this is so true.
the rise of the popularity of what you are afraid of even calling traditional masculinity is directly the result of the rise of very strict and authoritarian interpretations of feminism and gender theory. the actual academic content of those fields of inquiry are irrelevant to how regular people like parents and schoolteachers end up interpreting the mass media's trickle down of that ideology, and when the entire discussion is controlled and influenced by people who explicitly say they are biased against young boys and traditional masculinity, to such a degree that they are afraid of even giving it legitimacy outside of quotation marks, then you can't possible be surprised that young men are hostile to it and are rebelling against it.
@@Cheesemonk3h It’s almost as if the group of people (women, LGBTQ people) who are against this mainstream masculinity are the ones directly affected by it. Feminism is a reaction to centuries of sexism and patriarchy. Not the other way around.
I used to be an incel. I was lucky that I had people in my life that helped me get out of that mindset, many of these incels don’t have a group and honestly it is no one’s job. I tried to help but their first step is to help themselves and leave their chamber…
Blackpill always collects.
What is the definition of incel? If it's not having a gf then all of my batchmates are incels including me(boys college and boys high school).
@@arrow2380it depends on who you ask. It used to mean anyone who could not get a partner despite wanting and trying to get one. Then it became exclusively a gf. Some incels also would gatekeep the term if they didn't find you ugly enough. Now some people say it means anybody who hates women.
@@arrow2380an incel isn't just not having a gf. Men with gfs can be incels too. Incels are men who are Misogynistic and think they are superior and entitled to women. Plus if they used the language that the youtuber pointed out in the video then you are one. If you aren't resentful about being single or you don't think you are entitled to women then you aren't an incel
@@arrow2380not having a gf definitely does not make you an incel. It's ok to be single, the problem comes in when you attribute your single hood to your looks or the "wickedness of women". Focus on your wellbeing ❤
So they could only divide us into Stacys and Beckys?
Did they forget about Stacy's Mom? Cuz we all know she's got it going on.
Sorry I need jokes to get me through this
HaHHAHAHAH❤
stacys mom is still a stacy
Milf?
😂😂😂
Damn, that was brilliant.
i feel like the rise in popularity of the manosphere and/or being outwardly incel stems from insecurity in almost every single situation. if these guys had confidence they wouldn't need to be in these toxic communities. anyone out there with low self esteem, please don't go down a dark rabbit hole and try your best to remain a good person
The issue with being good is a lot of times people use it as a code to being useful.
Many good people end up being used by many bad people.
Don't be "good", don't be bad, be smart.
Insecurity is key for most successful businesses.
It happens in the plastic surgery industry, skin care, fitness, dating, the manosphere, and many others (even with smartphone brands lmao).
Making you insecure is extremely profitable and it shows that human rationality is a beautiful illusion since most people are emotionally driven (even if it's just initially).
Nowadays it seems like we've lost our ability to improve through intelligence or common sense. If you want to get in shape, apparently you have to hate yourself and create a whole "villain" narrative since doing it just because it's the smart thing to do isn't enough.
If your hand is burning, you don't pull it away because it's logical, you do it because you were too weak to avoid it on the first place, because you should be embarrassed, etc.
@@rutgerhauser2377 yeah i get what you mean and using "good person" is definitely a bad way for me to word it, i was trying to put things in simple terms but generally just meant it as try not to let bad experiences turn you into someone who puts someone else through what you went through. this cycle of abuse is very common and sad to see
It's also the echo chamber be cause people for some reason are so insecure about their world views the second someone is critical they loose their minds. That to me is a big problem. I think that's what leads to the incel extremism. They only hear one view point and the algorithms keep pushing that one view point on them.
@@rutgerhauser2377 wrong. You can be bad person but still be used. You know those people who can't say no to the boss, get angry and beat their kids or wife to feel themselves somehow powerful? They're being used but they're bad people.
What you meant is lack of boundaries. You absolutely can be a good person but protect your personal boundaries. Not being able to say no and exploding with hate afterwards still makes you a bad person.
I go to school with Avaneesh, have actually seen him irl and know a few people who have met him too, but he’s legitimately insane with both attempting to lie about who he is and then trying to grope girls on campus by bumping into them 😐 the fact his entire suite moved out when he moved in on campus too
Wasn't he arrested ?
As a Bengali college dude living in America, I wouldn't have escaped from the incel rabbit hole if it weren't for the pandemic. It gave me an understanding about how horribly wrong and offensive the views that were ingrained into me by my family are and now I'm just working on fixing the root of my issues. I ended up meeting a few women who had crushes on me, one of them I went on a few dates with but I couldn't end up being official because the environment that I currently live in is more conservative which can cause serious strains. So yeah, Imma work on making some good ol' money just so I can move out and be more independent. I don't struggle with confidence as much as I used to (even though my insecurities can linger sometimes), but because of the fact that the family I'm surrounded by can affect my ability to get into my first relationship just means that I got to be financially independent first in order to have myself be ready for my very first relationship.
My brother seems to be spiralling in the same way you were but your comment gives me hope:)
@@Asinearl I'm sorry your brother is going through it. Escaping it is very possible but it's all up to him to try to put in the work.
You're still a currycel
Still a curry 😂
COPE
I am loving the brown people UA-cam. I have watched so much white and black video essays. And loved them. Now I feel so happy to watch so much good brown people essays. I’m from India.
Agreed. This perspective needs to be known.
Diversity of perspective is always a really great thing to see, Saji is great
what it have to do with color of their skin?
@@sammy57533 if you're asking this question, it's because you don't already know. And speaking as a pale American, it's not something I can easily answer either.
saji sharma and ro ramdin collab was EXACTLY what i needed right now
parents fr
This rise in incel culture online between men of color is just very mentally straining as someone who barely escaped the pipeline myself
It's extremely easy to get caught in as a preteen/teen if you spend too long online and can be very hard to check yourself as you get older and stay in those spaces unless you find someone or something to pull yourself out of it. (It took my phone breaking mid quarantine causing me to be unable to talk online for me to break out of it)
I wish the best for those who get caught in it at a younger age because that's not their fault most of the time but past like the age of 16-17 it's harder to feel for them
The algorithm is very insidious in this way. You click on one video and, all of a sudden, you get recommended dozens of videos that are designed to appeal to you
It's the truth
its interesting how so many men leave these commuities by just stopping looking at them. you are what you consume and consuming incel content is the same thing
Well men of color tend to have harder in dating so obviously they are more prone to falling down that path.
Thank you so much for making this! While I know you of course do not speak for all brown people by any means, your perspective is super important and your insight(and the insight of the creators you invited on) allows me to think through some of my subconscious bias on my own. This allows me to learn a little more about brown perspectives without having to burden my brown friends for their input on such serious issues that involve race. Sending peace and good vibes; have a great day!
Brown is a weird way to describe ethnicities, yknow that more than a hundred million Indians are not brown right? And I don't mean just different people within India (NE India for example) no even within Indian ethnicities there is so much diversity and just calling Indians ''Brown people'' is weird. Categorizing people in skin colors is very weird and doesn't make any sense Like what about Koreans, are they white? If we do go off skin color does a brown Indian have more in common with a Mexican compared to another Indian who is not brown? How about we stop with the skin color thing and focus on Nationalities and Ethnicities?
@@parsifal40 was just using the word he used😅😅
@@carolinainterprets Yeah I know it's just a a stupid thing I keep noticing, usually by Americans
i used to have a lot more patience and pity for incels when i was a teenage girl with little experience and a lot more energy. im tired rn lol, i dont have the bandwidth to be every losers patient teacher. its been 30 years bro you arent a child, fix your damn self.
**edit**
ITT: mad people upset that strangers dont have to be infinitely nice to them - especially when they treat those strangers as subhuman. read at your own risk uwu
What are you yappin abt 😭
YOU DONT HAVE THE BANDWITH OMG LMAOO
You never had any such empathy in the first place rofl, that's just pity.
@@Eternitygate empathy for men who keep wishing ill for women and want our rights to be taken away? Sorry I'm not ruining my health over people who want to inflict violence on me
@@Eternitygate i literally said i felt pity for them, its like the second word i used to describe my emotions. but that aside, do you believe empathy is not needed to pity someone?
FAM. YES ❤️ i’m so glad y’all made this
This was a really interesting delve into this topic, I liked everyone's takes and your ability to stay respectful and show understanding of both sides without downplaying the harm that can be caused
i think you should definitely connect w jarvis to discuss the topic of creating a safe space for young men to kind of avoid this kind of downward trend a lot of this conversation talks about. he speaks a lot about himself and his own personal journey and like the need for content that isn’t isolationist of people caught in that content
That would be amazing
I love that idea! Kind of like an internet version of Big Brothers Big Sisters?
I really wish there was a space I could talk about how no woman has ever been attracted to me and I'm 25 and haven't had my first kiss yet and NOT be met with immediate resistance
Incel spaces are the only place I can go to say 'I am unattractive' and people just say 'yes'. That validation is life changing
@@painunending4610 you feel validated by people calling you ugly...? And those places are toxic and radicalize people. Get out of there while you still can
@@msjkramey why am I not allowed to say or think that?
To me a major problem is the echo chamber they reside.
The algorithms also keep them in that echo chamber.
Everyone resides in echo chambers. This very comment is an echo chamber
Why is this echo chamber fine but theirs isn't?
@@painunending4610the outcomes of echochambers define whats a good and bad one
@@painunending4610No echo chamber is ok. This is a problem with the internet as a whole.
@@OriginalContent89 That's What Everyone Thinks in their own echo chamber.
@@user-qw5pz6cx9w What does that even mean? I'm honestly confused. I said no echo chambers aren't ok and you replied with "That's what everyone thinks in their own echo chamber" so it reads like everyone thinks echo chambers aren't ok in their own echo chambers. What are you trying to say?
I have a stammer too, and you make me more confident about myself, by speaking to the camera as your true self. Thanks man
Be confident with your voice! Also stammers are cute imo, and they definitely don't detract from understanding what you're saying either. I hardly notice his anyway and can understand him perfectly fine! ❤❤❤
@@bearcat999 thank you, thats very kind of you😊❤️
Same here! ❤
haven’t watched yet just commenting for engagement. cannot wait to watch tn getting high as fucking hell. i already know this is gonna be a TREAT
twinning
Literally watching high af rn
Get high and watch long format content. That's the life 😂
Covid probably should've turned me into an incel. I'm an Introverted probably autistic dude who got school entirely shut down in 2020 during my senior year.. But I stead of using the time getting into red pill bull shit I got into philosophy and learned how to parse through my brain, and deal with the problems within me instead of blaming others for my problems.. with tons of help from Marijuana, of course
Good on you brother the herb will do you right in ur darkest times
@@n1qqa-man yeah we smoke weed together it’s beautiful
@@n1qqa-man I've got many weed smoking gfs
No, and I haven't since high school
@@sociallyinadequatefilms8534 I smoke weed and no woman's ever been attracted to me
@@painunending4610 sounds like your fault, not the weeds fault
One of my close friends is south asian and he's incredibly lonely. However this is because his mum uses cultural norms to isolate him from anyone else. when we used to hang out she'd be constantly calling him and trying to force him back home, making him feel that her health and wellbeing is his responsibility. He can't move out and leave her, when he's married his wife will live with them. I think if he didn't have such a diverse friend group he would have easily fallen down the incel pipeline.
as a south asian male i simplly lied to my parents to leave the house. my parents would NEVER approve of who I hang out with but fuck em
@@ShaiyanHossain literally south asian parents causd so much of these problems not socialising their children prooperly
@@ShaiyanHossain it didn't matter who. He's just not allowed, she tells him he's going to get hurt and it's dangerous
He has to grow balls and move out his parents house.
Well he is still an incel in denial. If women are not throwing themselves at you, you are an incel.
i was stalked for two ywars in high school by an incel. He was in one of my classes. He knew my entire class schedule. There was one time he told me I had to go on a date with him because he knew where I lived and told me my address. I did not go on a date with him but when I reported him to school administration, they told me there was nothing theh could do because he was autistic (barring the fact that I am also autistic.) He ended up following me home and I had to lock the doors and wait for my mom to come home for him to leave.
School officials can very much do things to discipline and address issues caused by students with autism. Autism doesn't prevent parent teacher conferences or the like.
@@fluidthought42 I think they were worried about getting a discrimination charge from his mom. She was known to be one of those kinds of parents.
@@blueskieshera
You knew his mom?
@@fluidthought42 vaguely? I knew she was one of the problem moms, I live in a small town
@@blueskieshera
So did you tell your own parents so that they can light a fire under the schools ass or talk to said mother directly?
Not all incels are the ugly ones. Sometimes they are the guys in the middle - not too ugly, not too handsome. They are ignored too.
I think it's ironic how the most well known incels online or in media were either average looking dudes or even genuinely attractive people that were just horribly misguided.
@@Kojiguma That's why they make it into media. There's many in/cel channels online where the guy is just ugly.
Of course it's not going to make it to the headlines if an ugly guy is an in/cel, that would prove our point, that it's not their mindset or personality but looks and looks alone.
@@Kojiguma in media and “”online””? Hmm….. the two places most known for their honesty and their reliability of information? No lies?
@@Randomlad56 I agree with you but my comment wasn't really about the media and more so about how easily incel ideology can poison your brain no matter who you are or how you look.
@@j.d.s.8132It mostly their looks that are the issue. There are a lot of men that are handsome with a misogynistic mindset and don’t struggle to get women.
This is pretty eye opening. I work in retail and sometimes customers get a little too personal with their lives sometimes (mainly around the holidays and complaining about family members to one of us when said person isn’t in earshot). Anyways, one time I was checking two Indian women out at the cash register. One of the women was on FaceTime with her husband who was in India trying to get him a gift but he didn’t seem to be engaging with her as much as she was trying to. Once the woman on the phone was gone, her sister went off and ranted about her sister and how she’s in a physically abusive relationship with her husband. She seemed mostly frustrated with her sister for not asking for help or leaving after her husband started hitting and cheating on her. What threw me off was the fact that she seemed more angry with her sister instead of the husband. She told me that her sister turned down a marriage arrangement to be with this piece of shit and kind of insinuated it was her fault for choosing him. I just tried to tell her to try making her sister feel safe in talking about her husband (and make it clear that even though she chose to marry him, it doesn’t mean she has to stand by that choice and that there was no shame in leaving) and maybe even use the love her sister has for her kids to get out of that situation (someone being abused is more capable of thinking about someone else’s safety than their own). I want to believe that somewhere in that anger she cares for her sister. But I think misogyny definitely played into how she viewed the situation. Still one of the strangest conversations I’ve had with a customer, but I could tell she was dealing with a lot. Now it kinda lives in the back of my mind rent free.
well if you do choose a person who abuses and are with him its your fault as well you arent a child
@@raghavnamasivayam5098no, Not at all! If that's the case then domestic violence is totally ok. Or your friend treating you badly is ok. Your partner beating you is ok... But we all know that's not true people choose the person because they love and think they are good people but if they turn out bad then the person who is cheating or beating is the wrong one. Because people like this portray a good image and then one day people caught them.
@@raghavnamasivayam5098 if you carry your wallet and get pickpocketed on the streets, it's your fault. You aren't a child after all.
@@_butter.cup_ lol poor analogy you arent choosing anybody to steal unlike partners who you choose even though you know what you choose stop acting like a clown
@@raghavnamasivayam5098 what if that happens to a man instead? would your answer be different?
Coming from a woman who dated all races of men. She is explaining as if white men can't be misogynists. To my personal experience, I have seen some white men to be extremely toxic, insecure and misogynistic, more than many Indian/Mexican men. Yet some non-white girl still obsess over them. On the other hand, I have found Indian men to be very romantic, sweet and caring. This is a very well known fact that many non-white women who were brought up in the west have a strange infatuation (fetish?) regarding white men and their physical beauty. Most likely due to media representation, Euro-centric beauty standards, internalized racism and colonial hiccups. Also I am very curious if she ever dated any non-white men before. Lol.
I do think the Manosphere, at least from the outside looking in, strikes me as toxic nearly from the start. (And I say nearly, because when the first incel group was formed, it was formed by a *woman* who could not find companionship, and she wanted online friends, if nothing else was working. And that lasted about a year...until a group of bitter misogynists moved in, and took over.) And I think it's not just obvious awful people rising to the bottom, like Andrew Tate, but some of the basic precepts. The first thing to say is "Oh, all women are superficial and looking for tons of baby daddies", which is pointing out while claiming no fault. And that's not great, blaming and distinctly Othering an entire gender. But at this point those statements are almost ALWAYS followed by the Chad hatred--"Oh, I can't get dates because my chin is weak/my cheekbones aren't sharp enough//I'm not over six feet tall/my eyes are too far apart (or close together, I've heard both)". And all of that? All of that is self-hatred--with genetics the culprit. And that is a cultural worm that burrows, and burrows deep. A man can do superficial things--changing hairstyle, upgrading wardrobe, working out, whatever--but that's leaving the base substrate alone. A man can't do much about height, eye spacing, jaw line--those are all genetic. They're setting themselves up to fail, and each failure makes them more bitter, more sad, more angry.
I often wonder what a “traditional” 1950s man would say if he watched a looksmaxxing videos, while reading the subsequent comments from men and boys in the comment section. . The more “traditional “ these boys have become - the obsession with appearance has also risen. They are also extremely catty toward good lucking guys as well. Sadly this phenomenon can never go back into the box. Once a demographic or generation starts focusing on their appearance and the current beauty standards - it will never stop. Some of it is a misguided understanding of evolution and animal behaviors.
@@carrington2949
See the behavior isn't inherently toxic though, it's toxic because it's expressed through a toxic mindset. Someone, man or woman, engaging in working on how they look as a form of individual self expression is fine. But when done in a toxic mindset it itself can be a form of self harm.
Think of it like buying clothes you like because your last favorite shirt ripped vs a shopping addiction, working out for fun and health vs doing it because you're compelled by body dysmorphia, etc. The underlying dysmorphia is the issue, not the "looksmaxxing". Guys can want to look pretty too, but there's a risk for men who lack a healthy relationship with their own self-image.
It's interesting to me because you can outline to some of them how the problem lies in patriarchy, but they are... unwilling or unable to understand that liberation does not come from dominating others or otherwise serving the needs of patriarchy. Like they know they're in pain, but they would rather feel that pain than the alternative because the alternative is too scary for them.
@@fluidthought42 I agree wholeheartedly. The comment section of these videos remind me of the extreme skinsporation posts on Tumbler and IG from my childhood mixed with a heavy dose of eugenics ideals thrown in to justify the toxic thinking. It is somewhat dystopian.
How is no woman ever finding me attractive 'setting myself up for failure'?
Have you ever actually sat down, talked TO, and listened to a romantically unsuccessful man? Would you want to? I'm open to a conversation if you want to know more about what it's like (most people don't want to know what it's like)
I've found the easiest way to find someone for yourself is to figure out what you're looking for in a partner that goes beyond superficially driven desires. If all you can obsess over is how a person looks, it's going to lead you towards toxic or unsavory people. All people are beautiful if you know how to look beyond the skin.
💞💫🔥❤️🔥🔥💫💞
Cope
Ah, yes, we do. 💞
Such a contemptible face you were born with.
@@gilliancarlson229 Respect. World's a fucked up place so holding on to a mentality like that requires strength in a way.
Even pedophiles? They're beautiful deep down as well?
Bro, your hair is so on point today! The curl definition, the frosted tips, damn! It looks really healthy too. Well done. As someone who also started to level up my hair skills, I know it takes work to get it that sleek and bouncy. Keep up the good work! You look great!
Alternate solution to many of these problems: unplug the Ethernet cord
How long do I have to touch grass before someone finds me attractive?
@@painunending4610As long as it takes for you to learn to love yourself first
@@painunending4610 the first 21848282 hours are just a warm-up bro, remember to never get up and to keep on grinding :D
@@painunending4610 till you lose the brain of a chronically online perrson
@@opheila-.2029 That's counter productive. If no woman is attracted to you, and I mean no woman, no matter what you do, there are only a certain amount of options that remain, none of which being normal relationships.
As an Indian girl. I would personally never ever marry into whatever tf these guys think of women's place in a household after marriage. I would much rather stay single forever if that was my only other option.
You will become lonely if you remain single...marry good man...
@@BarfilaSabun Yeh tab hota tha kyuki women financially independent nhi the....agar aapke pass paise ho toh kya aap aese boy se shadi karoge jo aapki family ke help kare..aapke liye khana banaye..aapki baat maane....
agar aap boys ko food,shelter,clothes doge woh bhi ek wife ke tarah rahega
@@Aayushjha-pc2eeit’s different in the west, it’s not the same as India
Saji, your apology at the beginning felt immensely genuine to me. Most people have a fraction of the sensitivity you do when talking about these sorts of topics.
I genuinely teared up, and felt immensely safe from your apology.
You're a great fucking UA-camr. I appreciate you immensely, and it's very evident to me the effort you put into making sure you're doing the right thing and being a good person. I love your content. Keep up the good work.
I think some of these guys should invest in love dolls. It's the kind of woman they truly want.
Not true
@@padhlebhai-mi2nd sounds like you need one.
You forgot the third category of women. Anyone over the age of 30. We’re considered washed up and undeserving of any love.
"Considered" is far from any functional hinderance. Those are just pathetic "alpha males" pretending as though there's such a thing as an unattractive (net) woman. 90%+ of single men would date a woman more than 30 years older than him. Ask any random guy. You'd hear the same thing. Actual alpha males in the wild, do things a bit differently. Ask sir David Attenborough.
As a normal dude, 30+ is perfectly fine. What you heard is nonsense spouted by groomers
Well.
Taking in consideration of women choosing men who earn more than them during marriages .
Why will any man who has worked his @$$ off in his 20's will want to marry a women who is off his age or maybe older.
Infact most women want older men and men want younger.
In india when a women is in 30's needs men who is elder than her which automatically deminishes her prospects as most men are married after 32 .
And don't get me wrong women in their 30's will have a high boducount which is absolute no no for most indian men leave alone the fact that after few years women in their 30's have more problems related to miscarriage.
@@vibhorejaiswal2997 incel logic right here. Your kind commit the most self deletion btw
I definitely agree wholeheartedly with the ending parts. Don't let anyone get away with bullying or abusing you. I know it might be hard to deal with, but it's surely better than letting them get away with it!
So I shouldn't let the people telling me to k!ll myself because I'm an unattractive men get away with it? How should I respond to those people?
WAKE UP NEW SAJI VIDEOOO
My cat kept staring at the screen whenever Rose was on. I think Rose has a fan 😌
cats have tastes and personalities. what type of cat you've got there.
@@PHlopheIg I’ll share. My cat is oddly interested in cooking. Whenever someone is in the kitchen cooking my cat will go on top of the Fridge and stare at whatever’s being cooked. It was almost as if the cat was studying how to work.
Edit: how to cook*
happy to see Ro!!
Very well constructed video! I love the interviews as well, especially Ro's insight, I think she is such an amazing creator.
Thanks for shedding light on this.
I love your chill vibes your videos are comforting
I really recommend the book ‘men who hate women’ as an insight to incels and different groups of men mainly online (who hate women lol)
You wish incels hated women so you can have an 'excuse' to talk down upon them. If you actually speak to them, only 1 in 10 will actually say they dislike women. All of them are extremely sympathetic.
@@icantseethe7680I'm not an incel but am blackpilled. I definitely don't hate women, I just understand the differences between our genders and how society is now much more skewed towards benefitting them, on the short-term at least. I don't see how anyone can look at dating statistics now and not be concerned, it's just denying reality. If they did research instead of virtue signaling, they'll understand what us men are going through. That denial of reality makes me have no hope for the future.
@@AM-cm2kj To sort of help their case, I’s say incels can start looking into ugly/obese chicks without making it seem like they’re fetishizing them. Then women in their 30’s, then moneymaxx single moms, then passport bro foreign countries, (yea you’re creating ER’s but if you have a daughter not a son you basically won). That’s essentially the pecking order when it comes to women.
@@icantseethe7680 A lot of incels might not realize that they hate women, but they do! You’re a good example of it. You literally just ranked women based on your view of what they are worth, which is misogynistic as hell. That IS what people are referring to when they say incels hate women. It’s clear in everything you say, no matter how much you protest.
@@beehivebat4766 Its not my ranking. You’re assuming that the mere statement that women of certain circumstances can be mote or less attractive via “ranking” is mysoginistic. Well, is ranking men based of height, wealth or income misandrist? No? Why not? Its not “ranking”. And if someone says I Don’t hate women or I’m not racist why would you even bother contesting them? You can’t control people’s thoughts or feelings. That itself is toxic.
Thank you for making this video after the previous one on this subject! It’s so refreshing to see someone want to readdress a certain topic and do it better
Been waiting for a deep dive on this since your last (unlisted) video. Very interesting, provides a more nuanced take that i think a topic of this complexity deserves. Good job :))
Curry cel is BONKERS
It's always interesting when people discuss issues they can't personally relate to.
Agreed. Sort comments by newest first and you'll see the real people like us
yeah like when men talk about how women work despite not being women.
NEW SAJI VIDEO!! I absolutely adore these kinds of deep dives with the mix of comedy and informative commentary - it is my top tier of content preference 🎊🎉
I do also appreciate you pointing out the line between comedy regardless of intentions when it comes to deeper topics that require more serious conversations
45 mins🙏🏽🙏🏽 thank you saji
I was so happy to see Rose in this! unexpected collab
Yusra saying "yknow" a lot and yet being so so well spoken is so encouraging to me omg
(i say "like" a hundred times in even sentence)
i know you didn’t ask for advice so by all means ignore me if you don’t care. but i’ve had a similar problem with filler words my entire life and my solution was to literally say nothing. i would stop in the middle of my sentence and figure out what i was trying to say, then continue as if nothing happened. it helped with not saying like/uh as much, but it also helped me get better at efficiently articulating my thoughts. it’s not a sign of poor intelligence or even poor communication skills to take a moment and remember wtf you’re talking about LOL just some advice from somebody who’s dealing with a similar situation
I just started watching but I'm so excited, I know this is going to be a really great video as always!
This guys seems to have a great "personality" and definitely knows what these guys go through every day.
Momma, I made it!
I think Indian culture doesn't accommodate differences or child upbringing well.
No one's there to guide you or provide any feedback if you're an Indian incel growing up and trying to court a potential partner in India, etc.
If you don't buy into the patriarchy or mysoginistic pop culture as a consumer to at least some degree, there's next to no experiential overlap with other men or women in India societies. It could mean instant rejections out of non conformity owing to no actual character faults per se.
Not to mention its a system where women traditionally have little recourse or a voice at all despite modernity.
I'd say growing up with a diverse set of folks is a remedy to a lot of this, but there's some more to it.
I grew up with a diverse set of people. My parents are quite liberal and made sure I understand and accept people with different races or sexualities
Doesn't really help when no woman's ever been attracted to you tho
@@painunending4610 still no woman's fault. sucks tho
@@painunending4610 I'd say work environments or hobby groups are a potential solution. With work, it varies greatly though. It's not always appropriate, especially if you're not on friendly terms already.
New Saji video? Perfect excuse to go make another cup of chai.
I'm sipping on some right now 😝
I’ve been waiting for a video like this
Keep it coming-your perspective is important, and your voice could many many people
Can you please make a video about Indian gym culture?? As a gym rat and employee I’ve noticed the gym culture is huge but also different from anything I’ve seen. It’s very prominent in social media. I’m fascinated.
Yesss continue to uplift brown and black voices!! 👏🏿
I love that you've teamed up with Yusra and Ro for this video ❤ I haven't watched Yusra's content, but I love Ro she is so creative ❤
I've been so excited for another one of these! I love hearing about this topic and so pumped to see it's a 40 min video!
As someone who literally broke up with this misogynist man / abuser
And I can’t tell u how sad I feel for myself knowing now that I was being trapped/gaslight
I have faith and I believe god save from this man and I can’t describe the amount of relief I felt the whole day
Just knowing your worth is the most valuable thing in life and that’s what I learn.
This is some of your best work, and that’s become truer with each of your newer uploads. Keep it up, homie. We need you out here. 💚
Such a great deep dive, Saji! Thanks once again for having me on! 🥹
You were awesome I just subscribed!😍😌
Just subscribed! Your commentary was really great :)
Wanna talk about caste system in India/Pakistan?
Ru u chamar by caste?
I was so happy to see you collab in this! Made me follow his channel
I was so happy to see you collab in this! Made me follow his channel
been looking forward for this vid !!
काश हमारे देश का हर एक आदमी आपके जैसे सोचता
you're an inspiration to young men with a stutter. keep winning King
Good to see rose again! love these informational videos saj
This is the first video I’ve ever seen of yours, and not only is it very well done, it’s given me the confidence I’ve been struggling with to make my own content. I struggle with my stutter that’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older, but seeing how eloquently you speak and don’t let your stutter stop you has really given me hope. I look forward to seeing what other content you have!
saji is breaking it down? DAMN.
First time viewer, you seem like such a class act man, instant subscriber
Also my god, whatever you do with your hair is working! 🎉
excited to hear your band music!!
This is such great and different content! Keep up the good work!
It’s always such a refreshing and insightful to watch your informative videos even if it requires more time! Thanks again for using your time to make this and inviting guests to bring more nuance to the topic
I’m looking forward to your next video essay! :D
this was so so good!!!! and amazing timing because I played clips from your other videos about racism against Indian people online in the class I TA for and this week I can show them some of this one!!!!
Now go n search caste system in India....
Poorly aged white ♀️
@@vklnew9824bruh why
@@vklnew9824 Admit that you would still date her. Its ok. Its not supposed to be this way. Even if it was, you wouldn't be alive to experience that pain.
@@vklnew9824 you don't deserve to be on the internet because you don't even know what you should and shouldn't say, its like you had no one to teach you things
Really well researched and written video! I rarely comment but I just had to. Huge plus for bringing on Yusra and Ro, too!
This was a really well produced video, mahalo Saji!
Love the guests in this episode. Everyone was amazing
Thank God. I am nowhere near as popular or liked as you to Finally talk about this subject. Please inform these clowns that they're going to have kids one day and leaving this crybaby shit on the internet is only hurting them. I subbed, hail to you champion!
I made it to the end of the video! Just commenting for the algorithm. I found this very interesting. I hadn’t thought about all of the intersections of race and culture in the incel community before.
i don't have anything to comment, just wanna boost this video for my algorithm bc i havent seen saji pop up in a while
the red pill definition shocked me i didn't know that was so serious. do they not know we are a patriarchal society historically, western society has been patriarchal for a good long bit of literal human history from like, BCE. you can't just say society is women centric as if it has ever been? 😭 bruh i need these men in school pls give them a basic history course
literature too. creation stories, especially currently prominent ones such as genesis, are literally all patriarchal. intro to literature class. PLEASE MAKE MEN GO TO AT LEAST TWO YEARS OF LIBERAL ARTS GEN EDS.
I remember explaining patriarchy to some commentors on another video and explaining to them how patriarchy subjugates both men and women. They then asked why the term patriarchy, when I pointed out the history of patriarchy they just sorta... well they were looking for a reason to reject the reasoning but they were just left with exposing themselves as biased against feminist thought or feminist analysis.
At least for me it did help me develop a more holistic definition for patriarchy though. "Patriarchy is a system where people are expected to enable the domination of women by men or else be dominated themselves." It basically polices for adherence because if you step out of line and instead treat people as equals, that's a reason you ought to be "put into your place".
No amount of biologically occuring organic compounds can make you believe what you believe. Only formulations. Let that sink in. You really think 5000 years ago, in lawlessness, people really, ahem whatever (remove h, 1 e, and v).
Patriarchy and gynocentrism are mostly the same thing just viewed from a different angle:
- men are expendable
- men are supposed to be tough
- men are supposed to work and fight
- for these men are rewarded by women
- women are supposed to be young, fertile and feminine
- men work, take risks, and sacrifice to acquire access to women who are young, fertile and feminine
- because men are strong, and take risks, and are ready to sacrifice, they are a threat
- since men are a threat they are viewed with suspicion as a default
- because men have to do all the work, they bear all responsibility
- since women are weak they are protected and kept safe
- since women are weak, they are not a threat, and so are not viewed by suspicion and met with skepticism, but are instead welcomed and helped
- since women are protected and kept safe by men, the men get to make decisions, while women are disenfranchised (as are children, for mostly the same reasons)
The word gynocentrism simply points out that the only reason men even get out of bed is to acquire women. "P*ssy makes the world go round." I know women might never truly understand this, but men do.
I am an incel and I am very happy about my life at this point
Hell Yeah Dude
such a great video keep it going! i've been binging you and ro's videos recently and the two of you are so dope.
Everytime I look at Indian right wingers online I feel like I'm going insane. Especially on Twitter.
Then despair as you realize that the right wing has 80% Approval rating in India
@@mvalthegamer2450
Well, yeah, the Middle East is known for its infamous amounts of homophobia lol
@@mvalthegamer2450yeah and it’s terrible
What does right wing even mean at this point
@@mvalthegamer2450what do they stand for ?
I noticed the links in the description for Yusra and Rose are broken for me, are they broken for anyone else? If so could we fix that? great video ty
fixed!!
@@SajiSharma thank you!
The difference is that when someone demonstrates incel traits... everyone is like "ew, no" and that person backs off, becoming nicer and socially adaptable.
The incel doubles down 😂 he/she doubles down all the way until they become completely socially detached and have fully rationalised why men / women r the reason for THEIR loneliness.
You make a point, but part of why they double-down is that when people say “ew, no” these incels form isolated groups with other incels.
This seems to be the case with many extremists.
My theory is that if isolating the cancer doesn’t kill it, then maybe assimilating the cancer will. Not assimilating their misogynistic ideas, but assimilating the people by showing them a better example of what they could be.
There are valid reasons to avoid people, but I think politically left people are prone to purity tests, which leads to isolation and extremism
Incel traits like ugly face or height?
Stereotype
@@Mew2Win stereo fact
@@kubricksghost6058 incel stereotypes like being ugly ??
This is amazing really good content dude im so glad i have this perspective
Thank you for speaking about this, you're a lighthouse in a dark world!💖
this is such a well made video idk how u don’t have more followers
this is something i've always kind of observed but didn't understand so loving the convo
Really well made video. Thank you
YAYYYYYYYYYY new upload. sick.
got beat here by the bots but got so excited to see a new upload. i've been binging all of saji's videos for a few days and this one was perfectly timed