WHEN A MAN IS A PROVIDER:ONE Thing HE WILL NOT SAY
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- Опубліковано 6 лют 2022
- WHEN A MAN IS a Provider
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/ @veronicav
This needed to be said. My EX husband always talked about me being a helpmate (biblical) before we wed. And when we wed, I finally saw that what he really meant was he needed help! Period! Child divorce was a blessing.
Same sis!!! That indoctrination is dangerous! I was being brainwashed by the church and him. Left them both expeditiously 🤣
@@kimb.2428 Girl! I was just having a conversation about how I had to unlearn the indoctrination of the church!!!
@@kimb.2428 😂😂😂 expeditiously
Can we do better with the next generation of Black men by letting them work and have responsibilities in the house, as kids, so that when they grow up, they will not be a burden to their wives when they get married. This is not the olden days when women had to stay at home and had nothing better to do than to wait on men hand and foot. It's time they realize this!
I feel that men who behave this way were coddled as children by their moms, and treated like royalty for doing nothing. My twin brother's only responsibility as a kid was to play video games. I had to wash my own clothes, the dishes, carry the groceries home by foot. Whenever I asked why did I have to do all of these things and my brother didn't, my parents would always be silent. But the subtext was always, "because you're a girl." That doesn't fly with me. So yeah, we have to bring up the next generation to be real men.
He will not say "what do you bring to the table?" That's incel talk and the biggest indicator a dude is a dusty
🎯🎯🎯
@ Model Win …. No lies told here. Facts !
The “bring to table” convo that imploded & doesn’t work at all anymore. Thus, critical thinking is making headway.
“The What do you bring to the table” verbiage of broke b dudes or b dudes who think they are the prize.
Also ladies, please note, they do not say this mess to nbw. Even if they are in a moistophere panel talking about bringing to tables, they are talking about BW. They don’t see us as the prize-they seem themselves as doing a BW favor by dealing with us. They might enter a hypogamous situation with a nbw with low self esteem, but they know better than to pose this question outright to the “preferences.”
@@kittykatz4001 My verbiage/mantra is “I don’t do broke …. tables.” Plus, I don’t discuss money with people because I’m conservative and it’s personal information.
I went out with a guy years ago. He kept complaining about his job, and he kept telling me he was going to quit. He needed dental work done and he asked me to help. Oh, I almost forgot. He also needed a place to live. Anyways, he wanted ALL of that. It didn't happen all at once, it was a gradual progression of needs. Because he had a job, I let him stay on my couch. Thinking he would be able to save up for everything. Nooope, he immediately quit his job. I said "how are you going to afford everything that you need done." He said he was just going to chill for a while."🙄 I told him to go home to his parents. He couldn't believe I did that to him.
You gave a couch?? are u mad?? let the bum go to.his parents yes. You are not his mommy.
What? He’s out of his mind.
Great warning story. Was it easy to get him to leave? I'd be scared that the man wouldn't leave when asked if you let them stay.
@@nine999nr I'm beginning to think that women should always ask police for assistance or supervision whenever they plan on asking a man to leave. The amount of men thinking they can refuse to leave YOUR home or even get violent after being told to leave is quite worrying
@@sensimania It'd be easier if they didn't let him in in the first place.
You nailed it once again. Sometimes a man will use jokes to groom a woman for domestic violence as well.
Yea a guy I was seeing tried that play fighting shit . He don’t see me no anymore. Go play wit your grandkids sir
@@andreamarie529 😂😂😂
This! One man made a joke regarding something traumatic that happened to me and I quickly checked him on it, he was dead silent. He knew that I caught onto his grooming and manipulation tactics, he is blocked on everything. I even felt it in my stomach that this was not right. Trust your intuition ladies!
@Kafizzle i am and loving it pookie!
@Kafizzle This is the part where i respectfully advise you to look up the word "projection." Cause you're doing a whole lot of it right now. So continue to throw yourself under the bus that you bout to die alone under and continue to talk to yourself in the comments.
💯💯💯 awhile ago I heard a male family member "jokingly" say he wouldn't mind a woman taking care of him. Fast forward to today: he's past 40, still lives with his mom (after being homeless in another state for about a year), never married, has a crap car that always need fixing and a low paying job. It's sad because he is actually an intelligent person with a degree. Lack of masculine identity and ambition is so unfortunate to see.
Sad
There's truth in JOKES
Good advice Sis. I remember one time a guy "joked" about putting his hands on me, to see how I'd react. I know that there is truth in jest, so I got the heck out. I reacted by leaving. What he said disturbed me so much that I could not stop thinking about it, or get past it to where things could be normal again. If a man jokes about ANYTHING, concerning the future, he is planning to do that thing to you!! Thanks for helping me realize this.
👏 👏
And you know what ❗this goes past our heads and we just take it for a joke. I have learned if you listen close enough men will tell you what their intentions are.
A random guy tried to joke to me about that and I acted like I didn’t know what he was talking about. Lol completely confused to the idea of an able bodied adult male not working because he thinks he’s a princess .
And they still don't understand why the whyte man so called kicked him out the home. Why should they pay for an able body
A man I dated a long time ago would try to shame me when I told him what I expected out of life. He would say some shit like “you sound like a gold digger “ or “that’s some white people shit, Black folks don’t do that”. My mother was a stay at home mom when we were young kids. Once we got older, she went back to school to get another degree. My dad encouraged her to continue her education because it made her happy, and thank God he did. He sadly passed away a year after she started at the college. It saved us from a life of struggle that so many men will leave for their families because they did not take the initiative to set their families up for the unthinkable. Life insurance is what you are supposed to have when you have a family…married or not! Investing in land ( my father did not wait for the white man to give us our 40 acres…he bought it himself. So, as of my second birthday, my father had invested in the one thing they cannot make more of…land! Back then, it wasn’t that expensive, especially in the area in which he purchased it. We were not rich…just a regular, middle class family making good decisions… not selfish ones.
Yet, as I tried to explain this to a brotha, he was getting more and more angry and trying to convince me that Black folks were not able to do such things, even I had just told him about my experience in my life and what my parents achieved with no help from anybody. Then, when he knew he was making no sense, he would come with “you keep trying to be white. The world ain’t like that for Black people “…. I swear, part of me wanted to slap him, and another part just felt sad for him. A few weeks later we broke up, and he went back home to his mama. Poor thing…lol
Today I am with a man from England (born in South Africa…Egyptian ethnicity)….and he never tells me there is something we can’t do. We have our own businesses and he works for himself. He is proud not only to spoil me, but to be the breadwinner of our family, and he even takes my Mummy to breakfast once a week because he’s the shit!
Women need to expect so much more from these men than fresh sperm! Don’t let those dusty, self-hating MEgroes convince you that they you don’t deserve to be a wife, that you don’t deserve security, that you don’t deserve security and a man expects that spend those important infant years with your baby, not at work, feeling anxiety because you had to drop your tiny baby off at daycare because you both have to work as soon as you push that baby out. FUCK THAT LIFE! Stop lying to yourselves about what it is you really want! You DO believe in marriage, you are just scared to admit you want it , because too many men have said that they aren’t ready for it, don’t believe in it, just plain don’t want it. So you want to be the cool chick that doesn’t pressure men about babies and marriage…hoping that someday, he will see your loyalty and decide to give you that ring because “we are best friends”….etc.
He’s making a fool of you, and he will continue to waste your best years until somebody new comes along and catches his attention…leaving you drained…credit ruined…heart betrayed….eggs a decade older… and all because you made a bet on this man’s “POTENTIAL”! DON’T DO IT!
You must find love where love is. There are plenty of good men out there, you deserve to be taken seriously. You don’t have to buy into the lie that marriage and the good life that comes comes with it is “for white people”. They need to STFU FOREVER, and let you live. Start dating other cultures, and you will kick yourself for not having done it sooner. NEVER worry about what anybody thinks about who you date!
Peace beauty 💗💗💗
Like it or not men do study us women. We as women have to not be so lonely and desperate for a relationship that we fall for this okey dokey.
That’s the thing, these types of men look for women who they think they can get over on. They look for signs of low self esteem, desperation, lacking standards and boundaries. They look for specific traits and that’s why they make certain “jokes” “comments” to see if a woman reacts in a manner that shows them they can take advantage of her to get what they want.
I saw black men in a saying that when they meet women they generalize their profession or completely lie about what they do. They said it’s none of a woman’s business what job they have and how much they make, a relationship should only be based purely on love and attraction….yikes 😬😬
Honestly, that’s what we should be doing in the beginning. Providers don’t care about our accomplishments, as long as we’re well-rounded and can keep up. Scrubs want the details of your success so they can plot on who they’ll move in with next.
@@DemureSpectabilis Well nooo, you can't survive in today's environment on $40,000 a year with a wife and a family. Why are blk women the only ones not understanding this? You need to think about the future and the environment we leave in. Why aren't these men thinking in these terms? If they are to be the providers as men, they need to be setting themselves up financially for a lifestyle where they can take care of themselves and the family. Black women..... why don't white men call their women gold-diggers? Because MEN understand they are to be the bread winners...period. Black men are the ONLY ones crying about this and they have every opportunity to prepare financially in this environment. If these men aren't doing that...LEAVE THEM ALONE!!
Those guys will be alone. Trust. Whoever chooses them 😬
I had a guy say similar and I told him that love and attraction does not pay bills or guarantee you eat.
He laughed. However, the serious look on my face made it clear to him that I was not playing around. We never spoke to each other since.
Fast forward 20 years, I saw him with one of the most desirable women in the world and she looked disgusted at buying the groceries he was soon to eat.
And the amount of sex they can get out of you of course.. only taking 🤢🥴
Real 💯 men will REASSURE you that they will take care of you and even if times get tough they will do whatever in necessary to provide for the family and carry out their responsibility as a man.
I've learned that even a man makings hundreds of thousands per year, may not be a provider. He got himself and his interests only.
This has been a major realisation for me!! A provider is in attitude, not in wealth.
I dated a millionaire who believes in 50/50. Provider is a mentality that is present long before he has the money.
You are so right, my ex hubby paid all the bills and bought the food for the family, we divorced because he kept cheating. Since my divorce nine yrs ago I haven't found a man even close to him, these guys are looking at what I have and what I have on my table and expect to sit at my table and bring nothing and don't want to help with anything. I'm staying single and I'm living alone in my house because I'm not taking care of or helping a grown man period. My focus is continuing to build myself and enjoy my best life.
You know what's crazy, is the fact they many of them know that there are women who have a table that is full, but try to act as if there's no sistas out here making bank. While the average man makes more than the average woman, there are those who don't fit the average. These PARTICULAR TYPE OF WOMEN are above the average, and these men think having an 🍆 is enough, or think that because he makes X amount of money, then why should it matter that it's not as high as hers. She should just be happy to have a man than no man at all.
Peace beauty 💗💗💗
Would you say, there's some regrets
About 2 years ago my 10 year ago ex-boyfriend joked that he was looking for him a woman in the nursing home to take care of him. I told him to never say that again b/c a guy I had recently met said that and I was TOTALLY turned off. 10 years ago I never married my ex b/c although I was young and naive, I could pick up that he was not a provider, even though by outward appearance it appeared he was a great provider ...educated with 6 figure job and 6 rental properties. Fast forward to 6 months after I left him...hasn't had a job since and been selling rentals just to stay afloat. Fast forward to the other guy who made a joke about looking for a woman in nursing home...had a massive stroke last year and living in assisted living. Glad I never accepted a date with him.
Power of life and death in the tongue. WOW
Dang! He spoke it right into existence.
Spin, you never married your ex , you never said he proposed or were engaged, six figures and(6) rental properties, he had options ( multiple women) trying to get at him.( Not just you). Young and niave means you thought you could get better, while riding the carousel of sexual experience(304 phase) now alone, and childless, trying to make it look good. The wall is real
@@heyoka33 So you think...carry on to make yourself feel good about your same bad habbits. My ex is still unmarried...last girl he dated was older hung around for 5 years then left him. I was surprised she hung around that long. He has no options...no one interested in marrying him. He and I have done some business together...rather he was an investor in my long sold apartment complex which was AFTER we no longer dated. To this day, he is still trying to be around me any business chance he gets. I'm not interested. I can do better...alone is better than him. Yes I am childless...and better off for it, b/c had I had ONE child with him, I'd actually be taking care of two children...him and a baby. Never had much sex with him b/c I am annoyed and turned off by men who are whinny non-providers...in addition to completely turned off by angry internet troller men who get no sex or attention from women in their daily lives, so they have to seek negative attention from the intranet by making negative comments to women.. But carry on and please enjoy the negative attention I gave you, since its generally thirsty men who can get no attention anywhere from women who jump on the internet and make negative comments to women. This is the last piece of little attention you'll get from me...enjoy!
@@paulacurrie2441 no need to entertain the clueless person above. Let this person just carry on his miserable existence 😂😂
In a man's nature he should be a protector and a provider. If he cannot be a protector and a provider, he isn't really a man worth dating or marrying, because he can't really provide for a family, yet alone himself.
This is so true, they will start by asking have you cooked and "where's his plate?" Or if you say you went shopping. They'll ask "what did you buy for me?" They also joke at work about you buying them lunch and stuff especially if you're in a higher paying position than them.
If this ain't facts 🤷
I cringe at the "what did you buy me?" Joke.
It’s so confusing as we live in these modern times. I’m definitely in 50/50 actually more than 50 on my part and I thought I was actually winning. I feel trapped
:(
@ Q
You figure out how to remove yourself safely out of that situation. Do not pour another cent into him. You got this sis
Once you do break free, take a month (or a few months) and find yourself again. It’s easy for your identity to shift in a 50/50 relationship without even noticing (speaking grime experience). Whatever you’ll miss about this person, you be able to embrace within yourself and, when you’re ready, someone who will love you the way you deserve.
Down low go and find some female roommates. You can do it through a real estate agent. Doughty Properties is the only one I know at the moment in Massachusetts. If both of your names are on the lease. You can communicate the situation to the landlord. Get everything in writing, so your credit won't be affected. Once you decide to leave make sure you are prepared to never return. Going back is a sign of weakness.
Can you afford to maintain your lifestyle solely with your income? Cover your rent, car note, car insurance, monthly bills, etc. solo? If your answer is yes then start making your exit plan NOW. You can do bad all by yourself! You don’t deserve to be carrying the weight of a fully capable grown man. Idk if y’all have kids but I hope you see this message & are able to get out of this situation. ❤️
This one time, a white man asked me in all seriousness if "next time," I would take him out on a date. As a black single mother, I am simply not paying for a white man to do or get or have ANYTHING. Not unless it's Xmas or his birthday. There will be no next date, lmao.
My aunt started dating a super lightskin mixed guy, basically white lol . He kept on asking her to buy gas for his car and also his boat. He would come over for dinner but he would never pay for groceries. This man was in his late 50s taking advantage of a single mother. He even told her “ I don’t like your daughter, she’s not nice “ her daughter is 11
@@nickimarie4733
She needs to get rid of this idiot asap
Yeah you def did the right thing. Unfortunately dusty/broke men come in every race and will try to take advantage of any woman whose attention they can get. I have dated men of different races and have never paid for dates, given them money for anything. All I’ve done is buy birthday and Christmas gifts as you mentioned as well.
I had a guy hit on me at work (hospital) and ask me out then said he takes the bus and asked me can I come pick him up for the date. I simply responded with the a no I will meet you there. Guess what? he disappeared! Fine with me because the same way you get to work you can get to this date. I was willing to drop him off after the date but off the rip? Coming to scoop you up on a first date? It was a hard no for me because I didn’t know this man I couldn’t tell you which department he worked in. And even then I see the flaws in my mindset willing to go above and beyond yet this man made sure he got to work on time to get that check 🤷♀️
He won’t say..” who you stay with?” .. when you first meet him. Asking that is in indicator that he’s sleeping on somebody’s couch or floor and trying to move into your place.
Asking what your living situation is early on is a indicator he needs a place to stay.
Once a man start talking that 5050 mess im out
Right! I always ask surprised and say “oh I’m sorry I’m not looking for a roommate at this time” Lol
Well a man don’t won’t a woman that can’t do nothing for herself …I’ll leave too lol sitting there behind pretty and putting on make up is not good enough
@@Antoniodagreat when a woman goes 50/50 with a man she is in fact losing. Statistics show that women still do most of the housekeeping and child rearing in the household. The pandemic is a perfect example that shows that. Women dropped out of the workforce in record numbers because the lack of childcare. And if they were lucky enough to work from home it was mamma that was doing all of the homeschooling etc. So you mean to tell me that a woman I supposed to be the maid, cook, nanny, babysitter, and then hand over 50% of her check to a man just to say she got a man? Sorry sir that’s not worth it for most women and they end up getting burned out. I would rather have a roommate at least I can have my freedom to find a real provider and help around the house while I’m doing it.
@@jazzyone1986 show me that proof
@@jazzyone1986 I saw that study on Facebook one day and wasn't shocked. So much so that I reposted it on my own Facebook page.
I've always said that a man who is comfortable in being mediocre isn't a male. At best he's just a male. Him providing and protecting is actually something he should be proud of. If not. Ladies just run.
This is so true.....my husband is a great provider and has never joked about it. Matter fact while we were dating I offered to leave a tip and my husband gave me a look.....Ive never asked again. He loves me and really cares for me and our children.
This is so true..knew a guy who once joked about a woman voluntarily taking care of him and when i asked him if he would actually allow it, he said no. Fast forward 3 years he texted me to ask if I could loan him money. I told him, I don’t feel comfortable loaning money to men. Appalled.
Surely he didn't just leave it there? I bet he started to plead his case e.g. "but I'll definitely pay you back by this or that day, you can trust me etc etc" :but this" or "but that"
"No" is a complete sentence - he doesn't deserve a reason.
@@sensimania oh of course. He shared that he asked his mom about it (wow) and they both agreed “that’s some old school..woman stays home..man leads and works mentality”. I said “precisely”.
There's truth in jokes. Believe them when you hear them
A guy I was dating “joked” & said that he was going to get me pregnant….. 🙊 we hadn’t had sex yet but I knew I couldn’t go any further with him because he would eventually make good on his promise & intentionally impregnate me.
My friend's husband cannot hold a job down and he never bothered completing his degree. But the moment my friend graduated college he impregnated her, every time she said she wanted to go back to school or do something to empower herself she would end up pregnant, now she has 3 kids and is stuck with this scrub in a two bedroomed apartment. She is the breadwinner and he just hops from one job to the next and is always working on some business idea that never transpires. He even cheats on her. 🙄 Point is your co-worker wasn't joking some men will intentionally impregnate a woman to keep her in his life.
You could prevent that by using contraception, lol! (Pills, implants, injections, etc). But I hear ya. That kind of talk is a huge turn off
@@siriusakari6729 Same thing happened to my friend. Except, he wasnt her husband, he was just some dude who dipped in and out of her life whenever he wanted. Whenever she tried to study something new or get a business venture started, she would end up pregnant. Then when she told him that he was pregnant with baby number FIVE, his response was: "Haha, you brute, looks like you won't be doing that accounting qualification any time soon". 😳
When she told me that, I couldn't believe my ears. I know all women aren't in a position to be picky/choosy when it comes to men, but COME ON! I'd rather be single
@@sensimania with 5 kids? How can you rather be single
@@maiamiimaiam4343 I don't understand your question?!
I think you also misunderstood. I was saying that I'd rather be single than be in a situation like hers (aka being open to a dude dip in and out of her life while giving her 5 kids and no support).
Thank you for this. Now I know which qualities to look for in a partner, a protector & a provider.
Ooh right on time with this video. I have a friend(I won't put any particular details out there😆) and her husband can swear-fo-gawwd that he's going to retire next year when he doesn't have the money to do so. My question is why does he think that his wife is going to carry him when he doesn't have the funding to retire. We know when a man doesn't want to provide for himself. It's never going to be okay within that relationship. Another good video Veronica!! Thank you so much. This just solidifies the conversations with my friend, and her feelings, cause she's stressed out over this.
Wow! Has she talked to him about her concerns? If so & he still plans to retire then I hope she leaves him before he gets the chance to retire. I’m sure she’d like to retire too but yet she’s still working! It’s the audacity for me. 😭
Well the mammy pick me will say all I need is love I can afford to pay all the bills an I gotta help a brother out speak life into my man at least I gotta man ..😭😩🤷
Big yikes, lol. She’ll go to bed smiling through the exhaustion bc she gets to sleep next to a man that she’ll have to feed in the morning.
@@DemureSpectabilis often they're the most masculine and grumpy women.
😂😂😂🤦🏾♀️
So true. I just left an abusive relationship and when I look back he often made sarcastic statements about what he would do if he caught me with someone and there is nothing about me that would suggest that I would step outside of the relationship. It started with emotional abuse, leaving and coming back, then verbal abuse and gaslighting me to believe I was the reason he's speaking to me disrespectfully, then there were times where he would push me, slam my leg in the car door and say it was an accident while the force he used made my leg look as though I was hit in the leg with a bat. It was horrible. He even said I would have to leave town if I wasn't dealing with him. I'm just grateful to God I got the courage to get out. Of course the healing part is not easy as I deal with a lot of paranoia and fear but I'd rather work on my healing day by day than to remain in that situation. No one deserves to be treated in that manner.
He won't ask you what you bring to the table if he is truly a HVM. He will know your value as a woman.
Agree joking means it's what they are
Huge love from France
A man who I was dating liked me because I wasn't no Jesus robot but yet expected me to do everything had his bike blocking the hallway and basically pretended to love my cooking (always asking for sauce) turning me into a server not a nurturer he was looking for a nurse maid
Was his name Rico?
Too damn accurate
Great content. Sufficient material to vet. I wish I came across this material before I got married.
A neighbor tried to court me and I respectfully declined telling him I'm happily single and could only offer friendship. One night after running an errand together (that was for mutual benefit) he offered to buy me dinner and I declined saying I had food at home. He INSISTED repeatedly so I let him buy me dinner. We took the food home and proceeded to eat it and he says "next time you buy". 😂🤣 No joke he was serious.
I have never had any of the non-black man that I’ve dated (and married) asked me what do I bring to the table
That’s a black male thing and men who are trying to act like black males
I’m glad you addressed this. When I was dating BM, I would get tested on this all the time. BM could tell I was a high earner by my lifestyle (I didn’t talk about it), but they would try me!
What’s interesting as I wouldn’t have considered them a dusty off the jump - they were college graduates with mid-range jobs!
No lies told. BM who are college graduates are looking for an easy come up. These predators seek out higher income earning BW. Meanwhile, they have the audacity to label themselves high value.
The more intellectual they are, the easier it is for them to trick you.
The BM you choose are that way. BM are amazing as a whole. The other option = self hate.
Just telling a Blaq guy where I live made many of them test me. 🤦🏽♀️ I don't even have to be specific about my address, just mentioning Beverly hills and it's a wrap. Now I'll get more specific and say the miracle mile area because many don't know that's a well of neighborhood. Sometimes they'll say where is that, and I'll say " it about this many minutes away, up north".... anything to prevent from mentioning BEVERLY HILLS. 🙄 Or they'll ask where I work at, and I'll say" I work in a hospital".. never being too specific about the field of work.
They know overall because most black women are race loyal that all they have to do is be a step above the rest of blk men, so they automatically feel more like a prize but the end goal is usually the same. They're looking for a women to leech off of.
My ex tried this. "Hey, didn't you say you'd be okay handling everything for a while?" Me (face like stone): "No. I never said that."
If he is a f&f subscriber or ks then he a dusty ,full stop ✋ 🤣
You're 100% correct
I was sent a screenshot of a woman who worked full time in college while her now husband chased football dreams, he made it to the league and she’s not working. When I replied that’s not me he said well she’s not working now. I didn’t reply.
???
You’re smart! Glad you didn’t fall for the okie doke!
@@incognitonegress3453 my guess is that the guy is dry begging… telling her that if she works now, while he builds himself up, it will position her to not have to work later…never guaranteed, so, hard NO.
@@mimose5747 I wasnt able 2 connect her thought processes n needed clarity. Yes... inappropriate behavior!
I think I'm just gonna stay single!☺️
pass on the idiots and keep saying yes to the good guys
As a person who married, and divorced, a 50/50 guy, this is 100% true
Very well said!
You’re right
Also when you are a lady and you want a provider, don't go about ranting that you want a providing man most especially to fellow men otherwise even the generous and providing men are gonna think you are a "social climber or just wants them for their money". Let your actions and behaviour speak to these men and they are gonna come after you. Also remember to be respectful always. Also you should have something doing to also support and show your worth.
We don't have to show our worth...We have to KNOW our worth.
It's weird how men can openly state that they either prefer a 10/10 woman or to use a 10 for s3x but get offended when a woman states her preference being a provider 🙄 they should really get over themselves.
Truth
💕👍🏾
I don’t want to be kept but I don’t also want to be used! If my woman is making the same income I hope she is reciprocating and not building her savings off of my back. If she isn’t coming at me sharing then I’m not sharing!! Momma didn’t raise NO fool!! Providing is more than paying for stuff! A man can provide protection, repair services, labor, etc etc. If you are hunting you are not a nester then and you should help with the upkeep of our lifestyle! With my leadership we will go further off of two incomes combined instead of just one! In a few years she will be way up financially then lose all respect for her man!
Sisters just know this, when a Man is a TRUE provider and protector....just know that he WON'T be a BM 🤞🏾💯
#Divest
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That's NOT true! I know providers and protectors who are BM. Sure they are ALL married or dead. But STILL that's what I know!
Facts!!👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
@@greengoddess6355 As for you, good for you! But my comment wasn't for you so...there's that. PLUS I simply do not care about your opinion or outburst as you OBVIOUSLY care so much for mine 😏
@@chanel123ful That's a lie
Gtfo with that BS
100 percent accurate!!!!! Seems it has gotten worst
Yes this generation of men do not mind begging for money and sex at the same time. No pride.
@@brishaberries0101 preachhhhhhh. These men are pathetic and beg to wear the panties in the relationship. They lack drive and ambition. Its such a turn off 4 me.
Unless you're bringing what you're supposed to traditionally you don't deserve a provider male and if you stood by someone with potential and is working towards that there's that and women have always worked and contributed to the household according the statistics
Veronica, I met a black guy who says his white ex wife did the majority of the work and never expected much from him. He says he wants to do things differently with me and wants to be a provider. Do you think a man can change in regards to that or is it all just game to try and finesse me? I explained to him early in meeting him that provider men are the only type of men I’m interested in.
Never tell a man what you need from him If you do, he'll pretend he's everything he's not to appease you Past history is the best indicator of future behaviour
Guys do the same test by telling dirty sexual jokes. If the woman laughs, she has done the thing he joked about. If she doesn't laugh he knows she is modest. It's how men vet women who claim to be old-fashioned or saving it for marriage.
A man in the position of success will not joke, about a woman taking care of him, tho by the same token, he has options ( because of the success). Access to many women is a given, and competition among those women will be stiff, so the higher you go, ( in successful males) the more you have to stand out.
I disagree with this whole heartedly. Men want to provide, they just don’t want to be used. It’s a test to see if your genuine or not. It’s a test to see if he falls on hard times. Will you leave or hold him down.
Some Black woman love saying the man's role is "provider and protector". And in substance that's correct. But when you ask black female's what the role of the woman as wife is. Many are not sure. There may be different answers if any answer. But since so many black women claim to be Christian. Let's see what the Bible has to say about the role of wives. The principles could also apply to girlfriends. Genesis 2:18. Also check out Proverbs 31:10-31.
Notice the two key words in Genesis Helper and Complement. As helper she can prepare food. Clean the house and help take care of the children. And if necessary, work outside the home. Now complement. There is so much substance to that. But basically, it makes complete. It can also involve encouraging respectful words. When the woman fulfills this role. It can have the effect of a cheerleader. Which can motivate the man to better fulfill his role. So many of the older black woman who claim to be Christians should be teaching the younger generations of black woman their role is to be Helper and Complement to their Men. And as such they can't be resting in their femininity all the time.
Fine.
To be honest, if it's just about the money... I will stop looking for love I will try to make millions( I can I am in tech ) in 5 years I can do that. I am already in the 6 figures stuff then I will go full polygamy... Because they only care about money. So I will only care about their womb and their P... Call me dusty I do not care. I am a person, not a bank account... But looks like nobody cares... If I will be used. I will use you too. Do not think I joke. That's not my character I always do what I say.
disgusting joke
Traditional men DO provide. But not to just anyone who asks. They provide, for the MOTHER of their CHILDREN. And also traditionally, to a woman who ISN'T the mother of SOMEONE ELSE'S children. That's tradition, that's providing. But providing is food, shelter, bills. Not shopping, not tourism, not shoes and handbags.
The distinction you make makes you sound like a dusty 😂 Providers don't differentiate between the two For them, bills or not, it's provision all the same
@SandraStachowiczLtd nonsense. That's self serving garbage.
Majority of these commenters, misinterpret the point and equally shown their thirst. Winter is here