I don’t know why people go into marriage thinking love is all you need. Love is the icing on the cake. You need all the other ingredients to make the entire cake.. God, patience, humbleness, faithfulness, commitment, self sacrificing , understanding amongst other things!
For myself I went into marriage for Love. Though we loved one another one was growing and the other wasn't and wasn't trying to grow. At some point he told me he didn't like that I wasn't the same. Which told me that he didn't like me. That told me by itself that it was over & divorce is happening. Now, I know that love isn't enough. But divorce shouldn't be an excuse goat either.
Total agree. Been married 45 years. 25 years into the marriage considered divorce. We prayed every night on separate sides of the bed. Found out years later, we heard separately from God during prayer, the exact same word to not divorce. Glad we listened. Living our best life.
I WAS MARRIED TO MY HUSBAND FOR 37 YEARS UNTIL HE PASSED AWAY FEB.22,2023..I ASK FOR A DIVORCE 2XS AND HE WOULDNT ..THANK GOD WE WORKED IT OUT..RIP BABY..
😂😂 Chance took me out..Auntie Tab on crack... if the ppl are real followers, they know Tab has been managing a lot of pain 😢 We love her for being a trooper and the consistency of the content ❤❤❤❤
My wife filled for divorce. The past 6 years I’ve been battling mental health issues, and it hurts to know the life I’ve known for 14 years is coming to an end. It’s lonely in these streets but it’s what’s she believes she needs. Pray for me yall
Being alone and in solitude can be a very beautiful and PEACEFUL way of life. You can create and design YOUR life as you envision. This is a time to enjoy and know yourself and find and cultivate your tribe that reflects your wants and needs. I struggle with mental health and stay tethered to my mental health/therapeutic and healing community.
I was in the same boat. My husband left me to be with someone else. That was the most devastating feeling I have ever dealt with. What helped me was listening to books about Divorcing a Narcissist, Divorcing and Healing from a Narcissist, going to therapy, surrounding myself with loved ones, reading the bible, changing jobs, and journaling. I pray for your mental health, and I pray that you come out on top of this. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
If it's to be, it WILL be. I have witnessed couples go through divorce... then years later, get back together/remarry.. it happens. Sometimes you have to get your space to get your clarity.. yourself right or in check... get that YOKE together (don't know how to explain it). Take this time as a positive- FOR YOU, and analyze where your FOCUS is. PRAY (and ask for understanding). *watch who you tell your business to... everything is not meant to be shared.( But good COUNSEL is priceless). 💜
At my job the other day I met an older black couple married 64 yrs. They were going on a cruise together. He was Smiling and she was still glowing. They give me hope that one day I will find my person.
Love this. I’m 37 almost 15 years of marriage. We’ve been through child loss at 32 weeks pregnant, left a church (lost family and friends bc of it), then our youngest 3 years old diagnosed with type one diabetes. I have no idea how we do it and we get on eachothers nerves, but we work so well together and we love eachother through the hard times. This is my first long lasting family, bc I grew up in foster care. We support eachother.
U got this beautiful and have been through alot 💛 and these moments in life make us closer or tear us apart and it's nice to have someone by your side who's been through it all with u wishing ya many more years of marriage ❤I love my husband and we lost our baby also and it brought us closer and had moments where it was so hard but we're still going strong ❤
Hell I been married 27 years together 30 years. I thought about divorce 200 times. Almost moved forward with talking to an attorney but God intervened every single time. I say all the time my marriage is a God thing and we both know it! Had it not been for God I would have made a decision I would have DEEPLY regretted. Marriage is hard but it’s worth it, kids are watching, people are watching. If you can work it out, work it out.. in God!!!!!
I've been married once. I have been married since 1993. 30 years. We didn't choose to have children, we agreed on having dogs and horses. I am a retired paralegal and my husband is a very successful engineer. We have never, ever even talked about or thought about divorce. We knew from the very start that God made him for me and made me for him. That is not always the case and I realize that. We still enjoy each other's company, companionship and communion. We were made to be together. We have had financial resources all along and I think that, sometimes, makes a real difference. We have not had to worry about bills, food, cars, animals, health care or insurance. That took a lot of stress off of us. He graduated from NC State with an EE degree and I graduated from Wake Forest University with a B.A. degree. Education helps people to understand themselves and to understand others. Our marriage has never been anything but a blessing!
Divorced saved my life and now I'm married to my best friend. November will be 17 years for us and yes we were at the the table talking about divorce but we prayed, talked, and listened to each other.
I’m divorced and whenever I see couples in long marriages I never envy them, I just admire that they were able to withstand the storm together. Cause I know the longer the marriage the more storms they’ve encountered
You actually don't know they've had more storms to endure. You are projecting. What you see as a storm may have just been viewed as a challenge. And some rather experience life's storms with someone by their side. Marriage does not bring the storms or increase the storms, by simply living you will endure storms.
@@gabrielle8571 She said the same thing you did, but in a different way. The longer we live (whether alone or with someone (marriage)) the more storms we will see. You are both right.
@@charlesgibson7299 Absolutely not. Saying that you do not envy married couples because of "more storms" as an introduction to your feelings on life's storms is implying marriage is the cause. Because if it was just based on living life, there would be no need to reference marriage being something you do not envy nor would it be a comment under this specific video. There are people who never get married but have the most challenging lives because of health, finance, trauma, etc. So, if stormy weather is the first thing on someone's mind when they see a long marriage...it most definitely is projecting based on one's past experience in marriage or preconceived notions about marriage and life in union. Long marriage is not causing an increase in life's storms, nor is living a long life. It is unpredictable. Someone can have a short hard life or a long pleasant life, in union or outside of it. So no, we are not saying the same thing.
@@gabrielle8571 First of all, she never said marriage ITSELF brings the storm. YOU introduced that idea in your initial response to her post. YOU ALSO SAID, “…by simply living, you will endure storms.” This statement applies to single life and married life. By simply living (a single or married life), storms will be endured. This is why the original poster feels no envy. She has lived both ways-so she knows, based on first-hand experience, that storms will be endured whether you are married or not. That’s it. You are making it seem like she said something negative about marriage-and she did no such thing. Just because she does not envy those in long marriages doesn’t make her a villain or anti-marriage. She just spoke her truth. There was no projection. Not even a little bit. At all.
@@charlesgibson7299 No, "first of all"...I actually wasn't talking to you. And you are explaining a lot about what someone else OUTSIDE of yourself meant. I've said all I'll say on MY perspective of the message above (that again, you did not write). But being married and divorced does not mean you have lived "both ways". There are multiple ways to live as a married and/or divorced person, misery and stormy weather being on both sides of that. So you don't come at me talking about implications I am getting from her message when you are doing the EXACT same thing with her message and now mine, Charles. And it seems you don't understand what being shady is from a cultural sense. From where I come from, "I dont envy *insert whatever*"...is passive aggressive shade about those who do engage in whatever is named. "I dont envy parenthood" "I dont envy people who work 9-5" "I don't envy vegans". Never in the history of ever have I ever heard someone say they don't envy something as a simple statement not meant to throw even the tiniest bit of shade to those who are doing said thing. Bc why not just say, "it's not for me"? Why angle it as a comparison method? And that's a rhetorical question, not a call for another essay from you.
People HATE when I say marriage it harder than having children. Children grow and move on. Your partner is STILL supposed to be there. That’s the real FOREVER
Amen I never birthed a child and had two miscarriages but my husband and I adopted four kids which is my husband daughter four kids she’s on drugs and we had them since they were born all four and that was hard raising babies with drugs in their system but we did it 21-18-13-12 that they are and I love them so much they are my babies still three boys and one girl only have two youngest at home but yes I thought of it a lot because two grown people together and married it’s hard it’s a three jobs been married but I love my husband because we have our marriage to God and let him work our marriage out and that’s who keeping our marriage and relationship together
Im 38 with a 4 year old and 5 year old.. homeschooling ..I'm with these beauty's 24/7.. marriage is not harder than children to me 😂 but I get your point and I still like it... because marriage is extremely difficult too.
Chance talking about what marriage has done for him how it has blessed him and covered him made me cry. I’ve never seen a successful marriage with my mother, sister, friends, it has all been failed marriages and it has scared me into staying single with no children. Ive always desired a partner but I’m afraid that our union won’t be successful. Im much older now and I have settled with the fact that Im just may be single forever. When I look at Tab and Chance together, I can almost feel the hard work and the fight for their union. They both want and choose to be each others warm blanket. I’ve always wanted someone that I could learn from and grow with. Growing up all I learned was manipulation, revenge, hate, lies and deception. That is what i’ve learned about relationships with men. It has made me most untrusting and fearful. 🥺 I’m 48 years old and I live my life believing that sex is enough for me. I am too afraid to invest in anything further than that. That is my truth and i’m crying as i’m typing this. Y’all say a prayer for me.
Just now prayed that the chains of manipulation, revenge hate, lies, and deception are broken and you are free from them. So now learn how to love differently by initiating Love trust, happiness, kindness into your life. Have yourself a good day and don’t you dare go messing up anybody else’s. Spread love sis God bless.
@@fancyvangie0504AMEN!! 🙏🏽♥️ I just love God so much because He unites us even when we’ve never met! Prayer is so powerful and I’m in agreement with you, in Jesus’ Mighty name AMEN!🙏🏽
I love when Unc referenced to holiness of marriage, and how he truly believes that the fruit that they are harvesting now is because of the work they have done in honor of their marriage. Amen. I wholeheartedly believe marriage will bless your life, if you are willing to work.
Yes y’all speaking facts!!! I been married for 24 years got married at 20. Chile them first 7 years was hard. I use to remember how they said it will get easier after the 5th year and I was like okay lord it’s been 6 years what’s going on. We also had 3 kids before marriage and 2 more back to back right after marriage. Honey!!! Them was some hard years. Now we are empty nesters enjoying each other and falling in love even more. The sex is amazing we don’t have to be quiet thinking the kids can hear us. We just been acting like newlyweds. This is 24 years of marriage. We focus on us and it’s amazing. Anyone watching this just hold on it will get better. I promise!!!
My husband and I have been married only three years, together four… but I believe we are still figuring ourselves out. The first year and a half was rocky… with arguments, not talking, and not sleeping together… it was a lot going on. I prayed everyday, then one day, things started to change and we are in a good place. We have been talking more, spending time together, and just having fun. I have used many of the gems you guys have blessed us with in our marriage and I just want to say thank you for being so transparent and honest. Because marriage is hard sometimes.
My 1st marriage should have been a single date or Group Date 😂😂😂😂. I'm thankful for the things I've learned from that experience though. I THANK GOD FOR MY DIVORCE! The weight was seriously lifted and I was able to further get to fall head over heels in love with ME! My marriage now is filled with so much love joy and appreciation cuz we are adults who know who we are individually and together. I'M A HUGE ADVOCATE FOR DIVORCE, MARRIAGE, AND REMAINING SINGLE!
Wholeheartedly agree. Marriage can be difficult & challenging but can still be beautiful & functioning if y’all remain honest & true to each other. And divorce can be cathartic & healthy because it’s not good for anyone involved especially for children to live in that hell!!
I really enjoyed this episode. I've been divoreced now longer (8 years,) than I was married (2 years on paper.) I knew the day that we got married, that it wasn't the right decision. Never go into a marriage thinking that the flags and sings you saw; you can change them. Marriage is a lot of work and both parties have to be willing. I thank GOD for the Brown's. Continue to allow GOD'S message flow through you.
The greatest love I ever witnessed was the love my parents had for one another. Being raised in a two parent home I didn’t realize how “Rich” we were no amount of money could replace the love , morals , values and Principles I was taught. Never take this for Granted. Great Content Fam 😢
Woooooooooow!!! Ya'll are my husband and I Twins! Beautiful and Blessed Couple.....We're 33 years together, and 27 years married ❤️ ♥️... We're the Brown's, too! Our "turn-around" time turned around after the 7th year, when I took 🤒 ill.....but God! Love ya'll 😘😘😘
@keyronwilliams606 like they both stated about God. He was The Key Factor that was mine and my husband's Saving Grace too, even to the moment of death, in our situation divorce was considered then he got sick. God healed my mind and heart when I asked Him what do You want me to learn help me to learn heal my mind and I did have a Jesus experience, He did heal me and I then prepared to love and care for my husband little did I know my husband would die 7 days later but he died knowing and hearing every day " I love you Robert". Take your problem to Jesus Christ and if you don't have the Holy Spirit ask Jesus for Him and He will give The Holy Spirit to you to let you know what to do and He'll help you do it, I'm talking only about you because really we should only focus on ourselves to change.
Don't do it. As long as there is no abuse hang in there. Pray pray and more prayer. I've been divorced for 12 years. I don't regret it but I wish I was married but not to him. I just miss marriage. He was abusive.
My husband and I have been married for 19 years together for almost 26. I have thought about divorce in the past and I’m thinking about divorce right now so please keep me in your prayers.
Your feelings are very valid. Marriage is tough. Every 5-10yrs we grow, mature and become a different person. Please don’t divorce. God has a plan and purpose for your life and marriage. Social media has made it hard, because everyone only share their best moments. I’m coaching several women in their 60’s. Everyone wants, what you have right now. Perhaps, is there something on your heart, that you want to do? Like goals or dreams you want to accomplish? A man or woman can’t make you happy, God has left a hole in us, that only he can fulfill.
Seek therapy for yourself and couples therapy. If the issues want to be worked out by both parties then awesome but if not focus on your mental and emotional health. No one wants to be married and miserable. Ask yourself what are the issues that have you considering divorce and do they go against your core values or disrupt your inner peace? Seek God to help answer these questions as well. Making mistakes is apart of life its all about what we learn from them. Divorce is not the end of what God has for You. Find a great therapist and pray about it. I pray peace and love over your life and marriage. God Bless.
Thinking about divorce is natural. But our love for each other and our love for God has kept us together for 31 years! Marriage is definitely not easy but with work from both parties, your marriage can last until death do you part! ❤ Pray together, communicate always, go on dates, don't take your partner for granted, and don't forget you need sexual healing too! ❤
Thank you Chance for acknowledging that "single" friends can have a positive influence on marriages! I Am not married and I've offered marital advice to plenty of married couples. I Am fortunate enough to have great discernment and I can see situations from all different perspectives. Now although I may be a rare find, it is truly one of My spiritual gifts. And thank you both for sharing your gifts with us!
After 23 years of marriage and 28 years of being together, we have definitely considered divorce a few times….. but now at this stage- it ain’t even in our vocabulary!!
Your transparency will help younger couples staring out who are willing to take sound advice and do the work. There are some people with wrong motives when asking these questions. Keep God first, and he will show you both when to share and when not to share. Be blessed and continue being a blessing 🥰🙏.
Isn't God so good that he can even take our lack of finances to keep us together? I am so glad you're still together (and that I'm still together with my husband after 33 years). God uses our marriage to make us more like Christ! Love you guys. Our grandsons love Tab Time!
@@AlieshiaTV i dont think you watched the video. lol They were going to file online but didnt have the funds to pay for it so they reconsidered it. so lack of finances kept them together in that case lol
I have to say that after 41 yrs of marriage & 50+ yrs together, it's still every changing & learning 😊 Very, very GOOD conversation 🥰 Facts, yesss ma'am
I love how authentic y'all are. This is the most honest discussion I've ever heard about marriage. Prior to this I've heard people glamorize it only or stay completely private. People really benefit from ppl speaking honestly about marriage. Thank you for your vulnerability.
I don't know a married couple who haven't considered divorce. Thank God for getting us past that thought. I often tell my Hubby that it's not necessarily the vows with him that keep me. It's the convenant with God, and he just benefits because of it. #ThreeCordStrand #TilDeath #MarriageAintForTheWeak 🎉🤴🏾👸🏾💞
When Tab said, “The way her credit card was set up” I screamed. And when Chance and Tab said, “I don’t like that no mo…I wanna do something else” I thought of DL Hughley’s stand up show and passed out!
Divorce is on my mind, we've done something's not everything but no matter how much we do our biggest problems stem from negative outside influences. Praying for God to give me direction 🙏
Prayers to you. I know all about negative outside influence. I hope you both can revisit the initial attraction. Rediscover all the things that made you gall madly for your spouse. Use those feelings to ground you in order to get the help you both need. Communicate the issues in their entirety. See if anything can be done from there. 🙏🏾
Communication is key and it will make or break a marriage. If one party refuses to discuss important topics or does not engage when a conflict arises resentment comes. Learn who you are first so you know how to pick a healthy partner. Marriage is beautiful with two people willing to grow as individuals so the relationship develops too. Thanks Chance and Tab ❤❤
22 years in! Those arguments used to be Hiroshima, but now we at some lil firecrakers. We good over here. AND Chance & Tab, you're so right about all the people who are blessed because of your marriage. Iss a blessing.
Tab said a lot, when she said you have to know who you. We all should be growing to some degree in our lives. When you are mature enough to grow together and love one another through the growth. And never threaten your spouse with divorce. Do all you can do to preserve your marriage.
This is a breath of fresh air. I’m divorced and I desire to marry again. This time I have done the work on me. My way of thinking has changed and I have a different outlook on life and relationships. Thank you both for being so transparent. May God continue to bless and protect your family.
I am from Barbados. I've been with my husband for 19 years, married for 12 years. i just want to say how much i appreciate the two of you. What you have said about marriage is appreciated. I have felt that way, and i am sure my husband has, but i am glad to say that we have fought for this marriage. I am glad that we are better. The two of you are a great influence. Your honesty is appreciated. Thank you, and may God continue to bless you both and your family
I can relate to this on so many levels. Me and my Husband are 32 and have been together since we were 19. We are continuously learning and growing Thank God.
It’s been over 20 years since I was divorced. Trusting God to meet & marry His choice for me. Thankful for my son that I was blessed with from that union. I agree that there is so much more than love needed but LOVE is definitely needed. Tab & Chance are helping so many people which is a blessing. 🙏🏽❤️
Marriage takes hard work by both parties. These days people are so quick to get a divorce as soon as things go side ways instead of putting in the work. You and Chance are great examples of how a married couple should treat each other.
Hi @gwendolyncarter6152, I agree. Tab & Chance Really, genuinely ❤️ & Care for ea. other. U can see it & feel that their ❤️ is 💯 when they talk & look @ ea. other. Their married, but also they R like Best Friends too. 👍🏾🙂😎 Chance 💝 cares for Tab & she 💝 Cares for/about him as well. It's evident & both R transparent with ea. other & us on social media as well. 👍🏾 That's what I 💕 about them. They care & want to help others as well. Also, in marriage it takes two to make a marriage work. Real love ❤️, No selfishness, or narcissistic behavior, no me, myself & I from the husband or the wife. No "I" in Team, it takes two work'n together>Team work. A married couple can conquer the 🌍 2gether. Espec. with the Lord God/JESUS on their side. 👍🏾😀
I love this! As I transition out with my babies, I realized that I did the work and that honestly was exhausting. Y’all spoke truth! I was tired and exhausted which I started to resent his ways. He was entitled and emotionally nasty to me which led to a physical incident. Divorce saves lives!!!!
Great Topic and you guys was spot on I choose to divorce after 25 years but I have 2 Beautiful kids and trust me when I tell you that I went before God and I prayed I found peace in Letting go
12 years with my husband, and man, I felt that credit card input part to my bones! 😂😂 God knew better to keep us broke! Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know we aren’t alone! ❤
I appreciate your transparency and willingness to share. I’ve been married 33 years and separated for 5 years. My husband always said he married me forever. He still loves me and wants us to get back together. I’m in a different space and while I still care for him, I’m not in love with him…. But I am seeking the Lord with this. Thanks this is timely!
Love your honesty and transparency. The world needs that today. 28 years together, 20 years married for my husband and I. Communication, trust, give/take, love, with God in the center of it ALL, is the reason we are still standing. And yes, divorce has been discussed on several occasions.... but God🙌🙌❤️
This is such a relatable topic, as a young married women I agree with this 100%. I’ve been with my husband for 14 years and we married very young and it was challenging to say the least but knowing who you are and growing mentally and emotionally over time and having those real conversations goes a long way. Thank you both for your transparency.
I broke up with my bf and he’s a great person but just wasn’t the person for me. I’m in my early 20s (23) and want to date with the end goal being marriage. As someone who doesn’t wanna get divorced I’m calling dating my research phase 😂 we dated for about 5 months but I broke up with him in person because I was just exhausted. It doesn’t mean he’s a bad person or I’m a bad person but he’s just not the person for me and he deserves someone who gets excited for him as he did with me. I know 5 months isn’t a lot but we hung out at our house (really both of our parents house because we both still live home ) so it felt really long . Even though it didn’t work out I’m greatful for the time we spent together and has made me a better person and I’ve grown from it
I’m at year 3 of my marriage and $ is our only issue . Everything else is great . But $$ I know is also a big thing in marriage . But me and my husband are working through it ♥️
I hear ya Tab! I am falling apart, had knee surgery today, need all my teeth pulled out and get dentures, have a comoket spine of metal since 16. On top of that lost my husband June 16 2021, my mom June 14th 2022 and out family dog 8 days ago! Have severe grief and my 6 year old, who us Daddy's Little Girl us having some heavy mental health issues and dealing with loss with anger. We are finally in therapy now, but its going to take time..pray for us. My daughter was also very close to my mom because my mom lived with us for 5 of the past 8 years.
What I so love about the two of them is thatTabitha, she is a very powerful black woman and we know she's making good money but she does not upstage her husband at all I appreciate it. That is not taking nothing away from my brother's Chance and who he is. Just shows the beauty and their relationship he doesn't even seem to be threatened by her. ❤❤❤❤❤
It's so good to hear the truth, I don't think anyone can not pull from this to add to their relationship. I've been married twice. Divorce was the right answer both times. I've not given up on being a wife. God has my King and he'll protect my future. Great information
😂😂😂 No lies detected. If you’ve been married, right after the “I Do”, you may start questioning if you’ve made the right decision. I’ve seriously considered divorce twice in my 18 years of marriage. Both times, I realized, I’d rather endure and stay the course because I knew the Lord would get us through the trying times, and HE DID! We put in the work! Great episode!
Please do not shame people who divorce, I was in a very dangerous situation and I was strong enough to walk away from the situation, before it got to a critical point. It took me years to recover. Never underestimate the strength it takes to walk away. Do me a favour you two are good, 🙄❤✊🇬🇧
Chance, your sentiments really brought out the tears because I’ve always wanted a man who wants to brave the unknown and go the distance with me. I am so extremely damaged 🥺 that I don’t know If I could achieve a long and successful marriage.
You absolutely can, but you have to do the work required to work on your deficiencies. I pray both that someone finds you and loves all of you and that you seek the necessary help to heal.
We were college sweethearts. This year we will celebrate 40 years of marriage and 43 together. Love is like a roller coaster. It has ups and downs. Hold on tight and enjoy the ride. He’s still the love of my life and we have supported each other’s careers and WORKED TOGETHER AS A TEAM. We have a strong loving marriage. IF YOU ARE HONEST AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER’S DREAMS AND GOALS IT GROWS AND GROWS. We’re looking forward to being there until the end of time. 💜❤️💜
I totally agree. Heck. I was feeling this way just last week, after 13 years, BUT GOD. Thanks for this. Marriage is for maturity, but it also takes God.
Definitely contemplated divorce about 3 times in my head never verbally, but I’ve vented with my village and other couples that have had problems and in talking to my husband marriage is working out now.
I think it’s also important to surround yourself with wise people who can encourage me. I mean people are actually married. I think some people just feel isolated in their situations
My Husband and I watch you Guys every Friday and look Forward to the Next time. You A’ll are Truly A bless Couple and a inspiration to so many . We are going on 36yrs that is coming up September 26, 2023 will be our Anniversary 🎉 and we are still learning each other. 58,59 years old. Still Stronger then ever.We agree with you Guys 💯 Every Marriage is Worth Fighting For depending on what the Situation is. Honesty is the best Policy! We Have so Much Love for One Another and had so many Hiccups in our lives but grew to overcome with so many challenges . Our Nugget is Try to Never go to bed and not Resolve or Diffuse the situation a little. Tell each other how you Love them and we will resume at another time . Tomorrow is not promised to know Body . You never want to every say I wish I had one more Day!! You Two are A Dynamic Couple. Keep Doing What Your Doing….. Much love for Both of you. Stay Bless… 🙏🏽
Married 3 years - lawd how many times have we thought about and how many times have we thanked God we SURVIVED ❤😂 #MarriageisforAdults! Thanks #TabandChance ❤❤🙏
God gives us wisdom. I left an abusive marriage with my toddler, now 19-year-old son plus a ton of wisdom that equipped me to help younger ladies and gents to avoid some mistakes and pain. No bitterness, thankfully, because I got to witness a lot of great marriages throughout my life.
You can always tell when Tab is not feeling it or not feeling well or whatever because she doesn't bounce around..doing the robot or really sing. But you pushed thru it girl.❤
Thank you once again for this amazing and much needed conversation. On 5th September we celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. We are so grateful to God for providing mentors who helped us throughout our marriage. We also in the early years considered separation but God brought us through and now for the past 15 years it’s just been sweeter. But we don’t take it for granted and we are truly open and honest with each other.
Love thus couple! This is such an honest and real discussion. Anyone contemplating marriage would do well to listen to this. 17yrs. Marriage is ebb and flow. Great discussion!
I love how you all keep it real. My husband and I have been married almost 23 years. It is HARD WORK. But I always say, I did not get married for it to end in divorce. You can work through most things that some are getting a divorce over nowadays.
Damn Tab, Thank you ! It sure feels good to have someone like you to voice such personal, relatable issues. I'm 48, just started going through menopause, I've also been having hip & dental issues. Boy when I tell you, I'm a WHOLE different woman than I was last year! 😕 & I recently decided to end a 10 year relationship that wasn't good for my 6 year old son to witness & wasn't good for my mental. So again thank you for being so transparent. 😘
Marriage is no JOKE! Literally only the strong survive. It’s an extreme mental challenge to survive a lifetime with the same partner. 99% of married couples do contemplate divorce. I’m having an episode right now. One of many I’ve had over the last 15 years. But as Chance and Tab stated, there will always be episodes where one or both have a strong desire to dissolve the partnership. Sometimes you have to just sit with yourself by yourself, evaluate and meditate and then decide if what’s happening in the moment is worth it. Most times it’s not that deep where things can’t be worked out. It’s easy to end it. The challenge is sticking it out and persevering to the end. Some things I could never forgive or get past. Like children outside the marriage, but I’ve seen others who have. Mind blowing, but they have. It’s all about what you’re willing to accept or not accept. What your deal breakers are and what your willing to deal with. It’s a personal choice for each individual couple. If you can work it out, definitely do.
I don’t know why people go into marriage thinking love is all you need. Love is the icing on the cake. You need all the other ingredients to make the entire cake.. God, patience, humbleness, faithfulness, commitment, self sacrificing , understanding amongst other things!
💯💯💯💯💯
Blame it on LL 🤭🤣
Humans are delusional 🤦🏾♀️
TRUTH!! You better say that now, I learned quickly. Blessings!!
For myself I went into marriage for Love. Though we loved one another one was growing and the other wasn't and wasn't trying to grow. At some point he told me he didn't like that I wasn't the same. Which told me that he didn't like me. That told me by itself that it was over & divorce is happening. Now, I know that love isn't enough. But divorce shouldn't be an excuse goat either.
Total agree. Been married 45 years. 25 years into the marriage considered divorce. We prayed every night on separate sides of the bed. Found out years later, we heard separately from God during prayer, the exact same word to not divorce. Glad we listened. Living our best life.
That's awesome!! Congratulations on continuing your marriage and obeying and listening to God! 🙏🏽🙏🏽💕💕
Praise God!
I WAS MARRIED TO MY HUSBAND FOR 37 YEARS UNTIL HE PASSED AWAY FEB.22,2023..I ASK FOR A DIVORCE 2XS AND HE WOULDNT ..THANK GOD WE WORKED IT OUT..RIP BABY..
Awe...
What a blessing. Sorry for your loss🙏🏾❤️
My condolences.
What I have noticed is that both Tab and Chance are beautiful people. And I hope that they sustain their marriage for eternity.
Yall are never getting divorced.❤
Absolutely, keep on moving together until eternity......you two are wonderful people.
Love you, sweetie pies!😊❤
They are truly Beautiful 💖✨💖✨💖✨💖✨💖
😂😂 Chance took me out..Auntie Tab on crack... if the ppl are real followers, they know Tab has been managing a lot of pain 😢 We love her for being a trooper and the consistency of the content ❤❤❤❤
🫶🏽☮️🫵🏾🙏🏾WHAT GOD HAS ESTABLISHED LET NO MAN DIVIDE 🫶🏽☮️🫵🏾🙏🏾❤️
My wife filled for divorce. The past 6 years I’ve been battling mental health issues, and it hurts to know the life I’ve known for 14 years is coming to an end. It’s lonely in these streets but it’s what’s she believes she needs. Pray for me yall
Being alone and in solitude can be a very beautiful and PEACEFUL way of life. You can create and design YOUR life as you envision. This is a time to enjoy and know yourself and find and cultivate your tribe that reflects your wants and needs. I struggle with mental health and stay tethered to my mental health/therapeutic and healing community.
🙏🏽
I was in the same boat. My husband left me to be with someone else. That was the most devastating feeling I have ever dealt with. What helped me was listening to books about Divorcing a Narcissist, Divorcing and Healing from a Narcissist, going to therapy, surrounding myself with loved ones, reading the bible, changing jobs, and journaling. I pray for your mental health, and I pray that you come out on top of this. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
I forgot to mention that we were together for 13 years and married for 10 years.
If it's to be, it WILL be. I have witnessed couples go through divorce... then years later, get back together/remarry.. it happens. Sometimes you have to get your space to get your clarity.. yourself right or in check... get that YOKE together (don't know how to explain it). Take this time as a positive- FOR YOU, and analyze where your FOCUS is. PRAY (and ask for understanding). *watch who you tell your business to... everything is not meant to be shared.( But good COUNSEL is priceless). 💜
At my job the other day I met an older black couple married 64 yrs. They were going on a cruise together. He was Smiling and she was still glowing. They give me hope that one day I will find my person.
Love this. I’m 37 almost 15 years of marriage. We’ve been through child loss at 32 weeks pregnant, left a church (lost family and friends bc of it), then our youngest 3 years old diagnosed with type one diabetes. I have no idea how we do it and we get on eachothers nerves, but we work so well together and we love eachother through the hard times. This is my first long lasting family, bc I grew up in foster care. We support eachother.
U got this beautiful and have been through alot 💛 and these moments in life make us closer or tear us apart and it's nice to have someone by your side who's been through it all with u wishing ya many more years of marriage ❤I love my husband and we lost our baby also and it brought us closer and had moments where it was so hard but we're still going strong ❤
37 years old been married for 24 years..
@@tiffanyharris8920 huh? I’m 37 and have been married 14, 15 next year. Unless you’re saying you’re 37 and married 24 years I’m not understanding.
❤❤❤
@@tiffanyharris8920,
So are you saying that you got married at 13 years old??
👉🏾 (Cuz 13 + 24 equals 37)!💯 👀
Hell I been married 27 years together 30 years. I thought about divorce 200 times. Almost moved forward with talking to an attorney but God intervened every single time. I say all the time my marriage is a God thing and we both know it! Had it not been for God I would have made a decision I would have DEEPLY regretted. Marriage is hard but it’s worth it, kids are watching, people are watching. If you can work it out, work it out.. in God!!!!!
🙌🏽
Amen
I've been married once. I have been married since 1993. 30 years. We didn't choose to have children, we agreed on having dogs and horses. I am a retired paralegal and my husband is a very successful engineer. We have never, ever even talked about or thought about divorce. We knew from the very start that God made him for me and made me for him. That is not always the case and I realize that. We still enjoy each other's company, companionship and communion. We were made to be together. We have had financial resources all along and I think that, sometimes, makes a real difference. We have not had to worry about bills, food, cars, animals, health care or insurance. That took a lot of stress off of us. He graduated from NC State with an EE degree and I graduated from Wake Forest University with a B.A. degree. Education helps people to understand themselves and to understand others. Our marriage has never been anything but a blessing!
Congratulations
Congratulations 🎉👏🏽❤
… I also wonder if yal choosing not to have kids also made your marriage easier, financially etc.
@@ashleybcookingreat question!
Blessings!!!!
That is great. Do what works for you. But also keep in mind that financially successful marriages can also endure challenges. Stay humble.
Divorced saved my life and now I'm married to my best friend. November will be 17 years for us and yes we were at the the table talking about divorce but we prayed, talked, and listened to each other.
I’m divorced and whenever I see couples in long marriages I never envy them, I just admire that they were able to withstand the storm together. Cause I know the longer the marriage the more storms they’ve encountered
You actually don't know they've had more storms to endure. You are projecting. What you see as a storm may have just been viewed as a challenge. And some rather experience life's storms with someone by their side. Marriage does not bring the storms or increase the storms, by simply living you will endure storms.
@@gabrielle8571 She said the same thing you did, but in a different way. The longer we live (whether alone or with someone (marriage)) the more storms we will see. You are both right.
@@charlesgibson7299 Absolutely not. Saying that you do not envy married couples because of "more storms" as an introduction to your feelings on life's storms is implying marriage is the cause. Because if it was just based on living life, there would be no need to reference marriage being something you do not envy nor would it be a comment under this specific video. There are people who never get married but have the most challenging lives because of health, finance, trauma, etc. So, if stormy weather is the first thing on someone's mind when they see a long marriage...it most definitely is projecting based on one's past experience in marriage or preconceived notions about marriage and life in union. Long marriage is not causing an increase in life's storms, nor is living a long life. It is unpredictable. Someone can have a short hard life or a long pleasant life, in union or outside of it. So no, we are not saying the same thing.
@@gabrielle8571 First of all, she never said marriage ITSELF brings the storm. YOU introduced that idea in your initial response to her post. YOU ALSO SAID, “…by simply living, you will endure storms.” This statement applies to single life and married life. By simply living (a single or married life), storms will be endured. This is why the original poster feels no envy. She has lived both ways-so she knows, based on first-hand experience, that storms will be endured whether you are married or not. That’s it. You are making it seem like she said something negative about marriage-and she did no such thing. Just because she does not envy those in long marriages doesn’t make her a villain or anti-marriage. She just spoke her truth. There was no projection. Not even a little bit. At all.
@@charlesgibson7299 No, "first of all"...I actually wasn't talking to you. And you are explaining a lot about what someone else OUTSIDE of yourself meant. I've said all I'll say on MY perspective of the message above (that again, you did not write). But being married and divorced does not mean you have lived "both ways". There are multiple ways to live as a married and/or divorced person, misery and stormy weather being on both sides of that. So you don't come at me talking about implications I am getting from her message when you are doing the EXACT same thing with her message and now mine, Charles. And it seems you don't understand what being shady is from a cultural sense. From where I come from, "I dont envy *insert whatever*"...is passive aggressive shade about those who do engage in whatever is named. "I dont envy parenthood" "I dont envy people who work 9-5" "I don't envy vegans". Never in the history of ever have I ever heard someone say they don't envy something as a simple statement not meant to throw even the tiniest bit of shade to those who are doing said thing. Bc why not just say, "it's not for me"? Why angle it as a comparison method? And that's a rhetorical question, not a call for another essay from you.
People HATE when I say marriage it harder than having children. Children grow and move on. Your partner is STILL supposed to be there. That’s the real FOREVER
Amen I never birthed a child and had two miscarriages but my husband and I adopted four kids which is my husband daughter four kids she’s on drugs and we had them since they were born all four and that was hard raising babies with drugs in their system but we did it 21-18-13-12 that they are and I love them so much they are my babies still three boys and one girl only have two youngest at home but yes I thought of it a lot because two grown people together and married it’s hard it’s a three jobs been married but I love my husband because we have our marriage to God and let him work our marriage out and that’s who keeping our marriage and relationship together
Im 38 with a 4 year old and 5 year old.. homeschooling ..I'm with these beauty's 24/7.. marriage is not harder than children to me 😂 but I get your point and I still like it... because marriage is extremely difficult too.
Chance talking about what marriage has done for him how it has blessed him and covered him made me cry. I’ve never seen a successful marriage with my mother, sister, friends, it has all been failed marriages and it has scared me into staying single with no children. Ive always desired a partner but I’m afraid that our union won’t be successful. Im much older now and I have settled with the fact that Im just may be single forever. When I look at Tab and Chance together, I can almost feel the hard work and the fight for their union. They both want and choose to be each others warm blanket. I’ve always wanted someone that I could learn from and grow with. Growing up all I learned was manipulation, revenge, hate, lies and deception. That is what i’ve learned about relationships with men. It has made me most untrusting and fearful. 🥺 I’m 48 years old and I live my life believing that sex is enough for me. I am too afraid to invest in anything further than that. That is my truth and i’m crying as i’m typing this. Y’all say a prayer for me.
Just now prayed that the chains of manipulation, revenge hate, lies, and deception are broken and you are free from them. So now learn how to love differently by initiating Love trust, happiness, kindness into your life. Have yourself a good day and don’t you dare go messing up anybody else’s. Spread love sis God bless.
Thank you dear.
@@fancyvangie0504Amen! ❤🙏
@@fancyvangie0504AMEN!! 🙏🏽♥️ I just love God so much because He unites us even when we’ve never met! Prayer is so powerful and I’m in agreement with you, in Jesus’ Mighty name AMEN!🙏🏽
I pray you take a chance on love life and happiness 🙏🖤
I love when Unc referenced to holiness of marriage, and how he truly believes that the fruit that they are harvesting now is because of the work they have done in honor of their marriage. Amen. I wholeheartedly believe marriage will bless your life, if you are willing to work.
❤yesss I loved that I feel the same way
I agree
Yes y’all speaking facts!!! I been married for 24 years got married at 20. Chile them first 7 years was hard. I use to remember how they said it will get easier after the 5th year and I was like okay lord it’s been 6 years what’s going on. We also had 3 kids before marriage and 2 more back to back right after marriage. Honey!!! Them was some hard years. Now we are empty nesters enjoying each other and falling in love even more. The sex is amazing we don’t have to be quiet thinking the kids can hear us. We just been acting like newlyweds. This is 24 years of marriage. We focus on us and it’s amazing. Anyone watching this just hold on it will get better. I promise!!!
I love this! Appreciate you sharing.
I needed to see ur comment ❤❤❤thank u so much there is hope then
That's beautiful.
I love this comment, gave me hope!… Thank you!
❤Amen. Thank you for sharing.
My husband and I have been married only three years, together four… but I believe we are still figuring ourselves out. The first year and a half was rocky… with arguments, not talking, and not sleeping together… it was a lot going on. I prayed everyday, then one day, things started to change and we are in a good place. We have been talking more, spending time together, and just having fun. I have used many of the gems you guys have blessed us with in our marriage and I just want to say thank you for being so transparent and honest. Because marriage is hard sometimes.
My 1st marriage should have been a single date or Group Date 😂😂😂😂. I'm thankful for the things I've learned from that experience though. I THANK GOD FOR MY DIVORCE! The weight was seriously lifted and I was able to further get to fall head over heels in love with ME! My marriage now is filled with so much love joy and appreciation cuz we are adults who know who we are individually and together. I'M A HUGE ADVOCATE FOR DIVORCE, MARRIAGE, AND REMAINING SINGLE!
I feel ya!
I wouldn’t pay for a legal separation either. I’m glad the both of you chose to stay together. Now look at what the two of you built together.💜
Wholeheartedly agree. Marriage can be difficult & challenging but can still be beautiful & functioning if y’all remain honest & true to each other. And divorce can be cathartic & healthy because it’s not good for anyone involved especially for children to live in that hell!!
I really enjoyed this episode. I've been divoreced now longer (8 years,) than I was married (2 years on paper.) I knew the day that we got married, that it wasn't the right decision. Never go into a marriage thinking that the flags and sings you saw; you can change them. Marriage is a lot of work and both parties have to be willing. I thank GOD for the Brown's. Continue to allow GOD'S message flow through you.
The greatest love I ever witnessed was the love my parents had for one another. Being raised in a two parent home I didn’t realize how “Rich” we were no amount of money could replace the love , morals , values and Principles I was taught. Never take this for Granted. Great Content Fam 😢
Woooooooooow!!! Ya'll are my husband and I Twins! Beautiful and Blessed Couple.....We're 33 years together, and 27 years married ❤️ ♥️... We're the Brown's, too! Our "turn-around" time turned around after the 7th year, when I took 🤒 ill.....but God! Love ya'll 😘😘😘
My husband and I are contemplating separation, and this episode touched me. I'm hoping for the best. 🤞🙏
Awww I love tht try switching perspectives
@keyronwilliams606 like they both stated about God. He was The Key Factor that was mine and my husband's Saving Grace too, even to the moment of death, in our situation divorce was considered then he got sick. God healed my mind and heart when I asked Him what do You want me to learn help me to learn heal my mind and I did have a Jesus experience, He did heal me and I then prepared to love and care for my husband little did I know my husband would die 7 days later but he died knowing and hearing every day " I love you Robert". Take your problem to Jesus Christ and if you don't have the Holy Spirit ask Jesus for Him and He will give The Holy Spirit to you to let you know what to do and He'll help you do it, I'm talking only about you because really we should only focus on ourselves to change.
Me too. Need prayers to decide
Don't do it. As long as there is no abuse hang in there. Pray pray and more prayer. I've been divorced for 12 years. I don't regret it but I wish I was married but not to him. I just miss marriage. He was abusive.
Marriage is not for the weak, my wife and I are going through a rough spot right now . But its taking hard work,not just the marriage but individuals.
My husband and I have been married for 19 years together for almost 26. I have thought about divorce in the past and I’m thinking about divorce right now so please keep me in your prayers.
Your feelings are very valid. Marriage is tough. Every 5-10yrs we grow, mature and become a different person. Please don’t divorce. God has a plan and purpose for your life and marriage. Social media has made it hard, because everyone only share their best moments. I’m coaching several women in their 60’s. Everyone wants, what you have right now. Perhaps, is there something on your heart, that you want to do? Like goals or dreams you want to accomplish? A man or woman can’t make you happy, God has left a hole in us, that only he can fulfill.
Seek therapy for yourself and couples therapy. If the issues want to be worked out by both parties then awesome but if not focus on your mental and emotional health. No one wants to be married and miserable. Ask yourself what are the issues that have you considering divorce and do they go against your core values or disrupt your inner peace? Seek God to help answer these questions as well. Making mistakes is apart of life its all about what we learn from them. Divorce is not the end of what God has for You. Find a great therapist and pray about it. I pray peace and love over your life and marriage. God Bless.
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Don't get a divorce pray and asked God to help your get thur
Thinking about divorce is natural. But our love for each other and our love for God has kept us together for 31 years! Marriage is definitely not easy but with work from both parties, your marriage can last until death do you part! ❤ Pray together, communicate always, go on dates, don't take your partner for granted, and don't forget you need sexual healing too! ❤
Truth! I have been married for 45 years, I am thankful for my husband. Your conversation is spot on. God Bless you both for sharing.
Thank you Chance for acknowledging that "single" friends can have a positive influence on marriages!
I Am not married and I've offered marital advice to plenty of married couples.
I Am fortunate enough to have great discernment and I can see situations from all different perspectives. Now although I may be a rare find, it is truly one of My spiritual gifts.
And thank you both for sharing your gifts with us!
I appreciate this conversation because this is what social media doesn’t highlight
I love your union! Praying for many more years of wisdom, love, and laughter! Matt19:6
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 as a 38-year-old single woman I really needed to hear this thank you for shedding light on this topic.
After 23 years of marriage and 28 years of being together, we have definitely considered divorce a few times….. but now at this stage- it ain’t even in our vocabulary!!
The reason I’m a huge fan is because of how honest and open you both are.
I appreciate you all so much and your transparency ❤
Your transparency will help younger couples staring out who are willing to take sound advice and do the work. There are some people with wrong motives when asking these questions. Keep God first, and he will show you both when to share and when not to share. Be blessed and continue being a blessing 🥰🙏.
Isn't God so good that he can even take our lack of finances to keep us together? I am so glad you're still together (and that I'm still together with my husband after 33 years). God uses our marriage to make us more like Christ! Love you guys. Our grandsons love Tab Time!
Huh the lack of finances keeping people together I don’t think that’s good?
@@AlieshiaTV i dont think you watched the video. lol They were going to file online but didnt have the funds to pay for it so they reconsidered it. so lack of finances kept them together in that case lol
@@TheCoastofMagdala I was speaking in general but no I didn’t finish it yet .
I have to say that after 41 yrs of marriage & 50+ yrs together, it's still every changing & learning 😊 Very, very GOOD conversation 🥰 Facts, yesss ma'am
I love how authentic y'all are. This is the most honest discussion I've ever heard about marriage.
Prior to this I've heard people glamorize it only or stay completely private.
People really benefit from ppl speaking honestly about marriage.
Thank you for your vulnerability.
Excellent advice, I agree about the whole change part: if you are not down with change, marriage is not for you-
I don't know a married couple who haven't considered divorce. Thank God for getting us past that thought. I often tell my Hubby that it's not necessarily the vows with him that keep me. It's the convenant with God, and he just benefits because of it. #ThreeCordStrand #TilDeath #MarriageAintForTheWeak 🎉🤴🏾👸🏾💞
Damn that’s kind of messed up
Amen!
So explain the covenant with God that keeps you?
❤
My husband and I just celebrated 35 years of marriage this week. So glad we’re still here despite the challenges. ❤
Awesome. Congrats and continued love to you both.
@@daphneereneantoine4106 thank you 😊
Congratulations 💃🏽💃🏽💃🏽
🙌🏽
😊Y’all please don’t ever divorce. Love me some Tab & Chance.
This episode was beautiful, transparent and touching, it felt authentic, thank you for "going there" with us!
When Tab said, “The way her credit card was set up” I screamed. And when Chance and Tab said, “I don’t like that no mo…I wanna do something else” I thought of DL Hughley’s stand up show and passed out!
Divorce is on my mind, we've done something's not everything but no matter how much we do our biggest problems stem from negative outside influences. Praying for God to give me direction 🙏
Prayers to you. I know all about negative outside influence. I hope you both can revisit the initial attraction. Rediscover all the things that made you gall madly for your spouse. Use those feelings to ground you in order to get the help you both need. Communicate the issues in their entirety. See if anything can be done from there. 🙏🏾
This was so needed. We aren't married yet but needed to hear this!!! Thank you Tab and Chance 🙏🏾
Communication is key and it will make or break a marriage. If one party refuses to discuss important topics or does not engage when a conflict arises resentment comes. Learn who you are first so you know how to pick a healthy partner. Marriage is beautiful with two people willing to grow as individuals so the relationship develops too. Thanks Chance and Tab ❤❤
I'm single, in my 30s and I enjoyed this topic you guys spoke on
22 years in! Those arguments used to be Hiroshima, but now we at some lil firecrakers. We good over here. AND Chance & Tab, you're so right about all the people who are blessed because of your marriage. Iss a blessing.
Preach Tab yes ma'am I believe in divorce and also believe in marriage
Tab said a lot, when she said you have to know who you. We all should be growing to some degree in our lives. When you are mature enough to grow together and love one another through the growth. And never threaten your spouse with divorce. Do all you can do to preserve your marriage.
This is a breath of fresh air. I’m divorced and I desire to marry again. This time I have done the work on me. My way of thinking has changed and I have a different outlook on life and relationships. Thank you both for being so transparent. May God continue to bless and protect your family.
Yes this!!
I love the transparency of this couple.
I am from Barbados. I've been with my husband for 19 years, married for 12 years. i just want to say how much i appreciate the two of you. What you have said about marriage is appreciated. I have felt that way, and i am sure my husband has, but i am glad to say that we have fought for this marriage. I am glad that we are better. The two of you are a great influence. Your honesty is appreciated. Thank you, and may God continue to bless you both and your family
I can relate to this on so many levels. Me and my Husband are 32 and have been together since we were 19. We are continuously learning and growing Thank God.
Me and my husband to. And I make sure we stay in counseling. Helps tho need help even when tines are good
It’s been over 20 years since I was divorced. Trusting God to meet & marry His choice for me. Thankful for my son that I was blessed with from that union. I agree that there is so much more than love needed but LOVE is definitely needed. Tab & Chance are helping so many people which is a blessing. 🙏🏽❤️
Marriage takes hard work by both parties. These days people are so quick to get a divorce as soon as things go side ways instead of putting in the work.
You and Chance are great examples of how a married couple should treat each other.
Hi @gwendolyncarter6152, I agree. Tab & Chance Really, genuinely ❤️ & Care for ea. other. U can see it & feel that their ❤️ is 💯 when they talk & look @ ea. other. Their married, but also they R like Best Friends too. 👍🏾🙂😎
Chance 💝 cares for Tab & she 💝 Cares for/about him as well.
It's evident & both R transparent with ea. other & us on social media as well. 👍🏾
That's what I 💕 about them. They care & want to help others as well.
Also, in marriage it takes two to make a marriage work. Real love ❤️, No selfishness, or narcissistic behavior, no me, myself & I from the husband or the wife. No "I" in Team, it takes two work'n together>Team work.
A married couple can conquer the 🌍 2gether. Espec. with the Lord God/JESUS on their side. 👍🏾😀
Fought by myself went to marriage counseling alone.. infidelity played a huge role... in laws finances I was unequally yoked and didn't know
I love this! As I transition out with my babies, I realized that I did the work and that honestly was exhausting. Y’all spoke truth!
I was tired and exhausted which I started to resent his ways. He was entitled and emotionally nasty to me which led to a physical incident. Divorce saves lives!!!!
The transparency is just beautiful in this relationship
Great Topic and you guys was spot on I choose to divorce after 25 years but I have 2 Beautiful kids and trust me when I tell you that I went before God and I prayed I found peace in Letting go
12 years with my husband, and man, I felt that credit card input part to my bones! 😂😂 God knew better to keep us broke! Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know we aren’t alone! ❤
I appreciate your transparency and willingness to share. I’ve been married 33 years and separated for 5 years. My husband always said he married me forever. He still loves me and wants us to get back together. I’m in a different space and while I still care for him, I’m not in love with him…. But I am seeking the Lord with this. Thanks this is timely!
I love seeing them together. It's such a pleasant sight.
Everybody has considered divorce I got married at 22 and my husband was 24 we been married 41 years we are blessed to still be together
😇
Love your honesty and transparency. The world needs that today. 28 years together, 20 years married for my husband and I. Communication, trust, give/take, love, with God in the center of it ALL, is the reason we are still standing. And yes, divorce has been discussed on several occasions.... but God🙌🙌❤️
This is such a relatable topic, as a young married women I agree with this 100%. I’ve been with my husband for 14 years and we married very young and it was challenging to say the least but knowing who you are and growing mentally and emotionally over time and having those real conversations goes a long way. Thank you both for your transparency.
The good thing, you both can look back and laugh at the idea of divorce!! Keep moving forward❤❤❤
I broke up with my bf and he’s a great person but just wasn’t the person for me. I’m in my early 20s (23) and want to date with the end goal being marriage. As someone who doesn’t wanna get divorced I’m calling dating my research phase 😂 we dated for about 5 months but I broke up with him in person because I was just exhausted. It doesn’t mean he’s a bad person or I’m a bad person but he’s just not the person for me and he deserves someone who gets excited for him as he did with me. I know 5 months isn’t a lot but we hung out at our house (really both of our parents house because we both still live home ) so it felt really long . Even though it didn’t work out I’m greatful for the time we spent together and has made me a better person and I’ve grown from it
I’m at year 3 of my marriage and $ is our only issue . Everything else is great . But $$ I know is also a big thing in marriage . But me and my husband are working through it ♥️
Married 27 years and they are absolutely correct in everything they said. ❤❤❤
I hear ya Tab! I am falling apart, had knee surgery today, need all my teeth pulled out and get dentures, have a comoket spine of metal since 16. On top of that lost my husband June 16 2021, my mom June 14th 2022 and out family dog 8 days ago! Have severe grief and my 6 year old, who us Daddy's Little Girl us having some heavy mental health issues and dealing with loss with anger. We are finally in therapy now, but its going to take time..pray for us. My daughter was also very close to my mom because my mom lived with us for 5 of the past 8 years.
🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾
Praying for your health and strength.
What I so love about the two of them is thatTabitha, she is a very powerful black woman and we know she's making good money but she does not upstage her husband at all I appreciate it. That is not taking nothing away from my brother's Chance and who he is. Just shows the beauty and their relationship he doesn't even seem to be threatened by her. ❤❤❤❤❤
It's so good to hear the truth, I don't think anyone can not pull from this to add to their relationship. I've been married twice. Divorce was the right answer both times. I've not given up on being a wife. God has my King and he'll protect my future. Great information
Just started watching, but yes! We're set to celebrate our 50 year anniversary in November, and we were 20 when we married. So absolutely, yes!
😂😂😂 No lies detected. If you’ve been married, right after the “I Do”, you may start questioning if you’ve made the right decision. I’ve seriously considered divorce twice in my 18 years of marriage. Both times, I realized, I’d rather endure and stay the course because I knew the Lord would get us through the trying times, and HE DID! We put in the work! Great episode!
Thanks fir being honest, people needs to here that marriage aint easy but it is doable
Please do not shame people who divorce, I was in a very dangerous situation and I was strong enough to walk away from the situation, before it got to a critical point. It took me years to recover. Never underestimate the strength it takes to walk away. Do me a favour you two are good, 🙄❤✊🇬🇧
Marriage isn’t to be entered into “unadvisedly” and this is why! Great counseling !❤️❤️❤️❤️
Absolutely!
Chance, your sentiments really brought out the tears because I’ve always wanted a man who wants to brave the unknown and go the distance with me. I am so extremely damaged 🥺 that I don’t know If I could achieve a long and successful marriage.
You absolutely can, but you have to do the work required to work on your deficiencies. I pray both that someone finds you and loves all of you and that you seek the necessary help to heal.
@@ericadortch Thank you Erica.
That being quiet even when you’re right is area where I need balance
We were college sweethearts. This year we will celebrate 40 years of marriage and 43 together. Love is like a roller coaster. It has ups and downs. Hold on tight and enjoy the ride. He’s still the love of my life and we have supported each other’s careers and WORKED TOGETHER AS A TEAM. We have a strong loving marriage. IF YOU ARE HONEST AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER’S DREAMS AND GOALS IT GROWS AND GROWS. We’re looking forward to being there until the end of time. 💜❤️💜
I totally agree. Heck. I was feeling this way just last week, after 13 years, BUT GOD. Thanks for this. Marriage is for maturity, but it also takes God.
Definitely contemplated divorce about 3 times in my head never verbally, but I’ve vented with my village and other couples that have had problems and in talking to my husband marriage is working out now.
Good for you! May you guys keep it trucking for many more years❤❤
I think it’s also important to surround yourself with wise people who can encourage me. I mean people are actually married. I think some people just feel isolated in their situations
My Husband and I watch you Guys every Friday and look Forward to the Next time. You A’ll are Truly A bless Couple and a inspiration to so many . We are going on 36yrs that is coming up September 26, 2023 will be our Anniversary 🎉
and we are still learning each other. 58,59 years old. Still Stronger then ever.We agree with you Guys 💯 Every Marriage is Worth Fighting For depending on what the Situation is. Honesty is the best Policy! We Have so Much Love for One Another and had so many Hiccups in our lives but grew to overcome with so many challenges . Our Nugget is Try to Never go to bed and not Resolve or Diffuse the situation a little. Tell each other how you Love them and we will resume at another time . Tomorrow is not promised to know Body . You never want to every say I wish I had one more Day!!
You Two are A Dynamic Couple. Keep Doing What Your Doing…..
Much love for Both of you.
Stay Bless… 🙏🏽
Yay, we share the same wedding Anniversary. My Husband and I will make 8 years on 9/26/23. 🙌🏽 Still going strong. Happy Early Anniversary. 🎉🫶🏽
Happy Anniversary 🎉
Enjoy Your Day. Pray you Have many,many more..
GOD Bless🙏🏽
@@jacquelineboyd8759 Awww thank you Beautiful. Same to you and Happy Anniversary 🫶🏽🙌🏽
This is such a real and needed convo. Keep God at the centre. Marriage doesn’t change the messiest of life. It’s not easy
Thank y’all for sharing being open and honest
Tab & Chance = MMGA (Making Marriage Great Again) Thanks for the inspiration.
Married 3 years - lawd how many times have we thought about and how many times have we thanked God we SURVIVED ❤😂 #MarriageisforAdults! Thanks #TabandChance ❤❤🙏
God gives us wisdom. I left an abusive marriage with my toddler, now 19-year-old son plus a ton of wisdom that equipped me to help younger ladies and gents to avoid some mistakes and pain. No bitterness, thankfully, because I got to witness a lot of great marriages throughout my life.
You can always tell when Tab is not feeling it or not feeling well or whatever because she doesn't bounce around..doing the robot or really sing. But you pushed thru it girl.❤
Thank you once again for this amazing and much needed conversation. On 5th September we celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. We are so grateful to God for providing mentors who helped us throughout our marriage. We also in the early years considered separation but God brought us through and now for the past 15 years it’s just been sweeter. But we don’t take it for granted and we are truly open and honest with each other.
Congratulations . Your anniversary is my birthday. Cheers to more years.
I love the way Tab looks at Chance with so much love, admiration, understanding and gratittude😍🥹
Love thus couple! This is such an honest and real discussion. Anyone contemplating marriage would do well to listen to this. 17yrs. Marriage is ebb and flow. Great discussion!
"...IN ALL HONESTY, have you done Everything you could"? Perfectly stated.
I love how you all keep it real. My husband and I have been married almost 23 years. It is HARD WORK. But I always say, I did not get married for it to end in divorce. You can work through most things that some are getting a divorce over nowadays.
I have been married for 25 years and y’all telling the whole truth and nothing but the whole truth!! ❤
That synchronized "Yeeeeeah!" 💸 at 6:14 was TOO FUNNY!! 😂🤣
Agreed 😂
Damn Tab, Thank you !
It sure feels good to have someone like you to voice such personal, relatable issues.
I'm 48, just started going through menopause, I've also been having hip & dental issues. Boy when I tell you, I'm a WHOLE different woman than I was last year! 😕 & I recently decided to end a 10 year relationship that wasn't good for my 6 year old son to witness & wasn't good for my mental.
So again thank you for being so transparent. 😘
I will be praying for you. Many blessings and beautiful beginnings to come! 🙏🏾😇
@@WithFlyingColors Thanks a lot
Marriage is no JOKE! Literally only the strong survive. It’s an extreme mental challenge to survive a lifetime with the same partner. 99% of married couples do contemplate divorce. I’m having an episode right now. One of many I’ve had over the last 15 years. But as Chance and Tab stated, there will always be episodes where one or both have a strong desire to dissolve the partnership. Sometimes you have to just sit with yourself by yourself, evaluate and meditate and then decide if what’s happening in the moment is worth it. Most times it’s not that deep where things can’t be worked out.
It’s easy to end it. The challenge is sticking it out and persevering to the end. Some things I could never forgive or get past. Like children outside the marriage, but I’ve seen others who have. Mind blowing, but they have. It’s all about what you’re willing to accept or not accept. What your deal breakers are and what your willing to deal with. It’s a personal choice for each individual couple. If you can work it out, definitely do.