Sayf is saying he has been misinterpreted and misunderstood! Please have a look at his clarification video reacting to the backlash: ua-cam.com/video/okf9r528Nr0/v-deo.htmlsi=EAcXP2mi99NNbgQP (Or check his page @Sayfstream)
@@SK-xo4br great feedback thank you, and yes emotional maturity is vital for both. But regarding dictatorship, every team has a captain, a leader, someone in charge.. No?
@@Violety94yeah i realised a year ago that our job as a man is just to make as much money as possible for the family even if it kills us. We aren't going to find mercy from our wives even for a short time, she will bring it up forever in the future
As a woman, I felt so frustrated while watching this. You are essentially expecting a woman to forgo her Islamic right of being financially supported whilst insisting that your Islamic right to be the leader of the household is respected. The brother who said expecting your wife to contribute financially reduces her respect for you is spot on. I want to view my future husband (in sha' Allah) as a leader and protector, thus it's natural to feel he's not fulfilling his basic duties if I'm also contributing. I wish brothers would view this differently.. If upon getting to know a sister for marriage, she tells you she is infertile, I assume most Muslim men would not marry her, EVEN THOUGH with Allah's will and trust in his power, this can very well change and he can bless them with children in the future. If a man's goal is to start a family, then this is valid, and It's the same for women. We are aware that a man's role in the family is to provide and protect as they are the qawam of the household, therefore, I expect that he can do those things from the get-go. I do not want a rich man, I simply want to live comfortably in sha' Allah, and if anything affects his finances in the future, like illness or redundancy, then as a wife it's my duty to stick beside him and help in any way I can if he allows me. By this time, I would have already gained respect for him as a hard-working provider and loyalty is what would keep me. Nonetheless, I don't think a Muslim man should approach a sister for marriage with the proposal of her financially contributing, because we already know that nine times out of ten, we will also be the ones covering most of the household duties like cooking and cleaning or time with children. Besides, a man should have more gheerah for his wife working around other males anyway. Thanks for reading my TED Talk✌🏼
when discussing women working, men ALWAYS talk about her money and how she should share it or not with the family, but they never discuss housework and how they are going to do some chores as well. even though their job as providers is non negotiable while woman doing housework is circumstantial.
Hun. A lot of what you wrote was right but honestly just some advise. Try to shorten your paragraphs. Not many people will read all your important points and loose focus if you keep going on and on and on. We’re living in times where 15 seconds video is stimulating. Not 15 mins or 30 mins.
@@ayanelmi3405 Is this for real? If so really sorry to hear this. Was he asking you to pay 50% of bills? Also hopefully you took the necessary steps and took advice from elders and wiser people.
@@Triple-ATalks Yes, it's foreal. He had expectations and was clearly violating our sunnah and therefore my rights, that was a breach- i lost the respect as you said. He knew exactly what my POV was from the 1st month of talking, decided to talk about 1 week before the weeding and it was a no no for me.
@@ayanelmi3405 men should definitely be open and honest with their intentions from the beginning. But maybe he was so interested in you that he felt shy to disclose that vital information. Just for clarification did this happen after you watched our episode or before it? We encourage all brothers and sisters to know their rights and if they wish to relinquish any of them then they know the consequences. To all readers and watchers, just a reminder, we are not preachers or dawa guys, we are just regular Muslim men giving our opinions on everyday life.
@@Triple-ATalks I really don't think there should be excuses for this behaviour PERIOD. This happened before I watched the podcast. The issue with the marriage crisis is because of men and women just choosing to be neglectful of their responsibilities that was ordained to them by Allah and choosing to be delusional and act like non believers. There's a lot of blind people leading the blind, and it's up to us to not be deceived, but that comes with experience.
Solid point ! Research consistently shows that education plays a key role in reducing divorce rates. Educated individuals often have a clearer understanding of the dynamics of healthy relationships, better communication skills, and more effective conflict resolution strategies. Just as success in any field requires training and knowledge, thriving in marriage requires an understanding of its core components, such as emotional connection, mutual respect, and shared goals. Many marriages fail not because of a lack of love, but due to a lack of awareness and preparation. Education provides the tools to build clarity, understanding, and resilience, helping couples navigate challenges and grow together.
My perspective is a bit different. Today's educstion is designed to instill a sense of superiority and arrogamce and I say this as a degree educated individual. A Univeristy of Michigan study found that university students are far less empathetic than their predecessors in the 1960s. Another study found the medical education system made doctors less emapthetic. Today's education doesnt teach you critical thinking, wisdom or problem solving or mediation. It has simply become a symbol of prestige and success. Girls with degrees wont even consider a man without a degree. Our grandparents did not have degrees but they had wisdom to make a marriage work. Today's generation has degrees but lack empathy towards the spouse to make the marriage work.
Guys if you want to see more of the gang and some personal stories then check out the latest episode 👇🏾 ua-cam.com/video/okJIXTvmUYI/v-deo.htmlsi=MoPr0j8Z3mnnwGoG
Can you substantiate your claim with some sources. I read online that those with more education especially degree level have a higher rate of divorce (usually argue more). If your referring to Islamic education and marriage rights, i know a few alima/knowledge sisters that have had bitter divorces. The knowledge went down the drain. Anyway, kindly have a look at my video for clarity: ua-cam.com/video/iIOTtg-4ZhI/v-deo.html
New subscriber here, I literally sat and watched the whole podcast, and honestly my opinion goes in line with brother Muaz, it’s solely about education and the lack thereof which leads to significant issues within a marriage. I believe if a man wants to get married he needs to be in a position to provide and support his household for 100% of the utilities and bills. If he can’t do that when he shouldn’t expect luxury or “king” treatment from his wife if he’s not providing. It’s that simple. Come on brothers we need to do better and be that man who deserves a woman who wants to look after us and treat us good.
Its agreed that men pay for the utilities, Bills, house but what about a women who likes a beautiful home and clothes and exceeds his budget? Should he work to provide her comfort or should she contribute and pay for her quality of life. Money goes beyond just bills now, it always had, but more now due to the constant bombardment of materialism.
Looooool! 70/30. Good banter and discussion! I think everyone made relevant points. Realistically, have to look at circumstances and personalities too. We are not all of the same disposition so what works for one, wouldn't work for another. We should be introspective and educated to do what is best for both parties. There's always the rule and then the exception in any case.
@ By default men should be the 100% providers but circumstances will determine how reality plays out. All situations are nuanced so we must always analyse and apply the most correct solution. Men must be upfront about their financial status and the women can make a decision based on that and be introspective and honest with themselves. Marriage is a companionship and both genders should be coming together with the idea that they are making a life together for the sake of Allah and the hereafter. We must be merciful and work as a team, to nurture, build and develop love and affection. A man can start off being the full provider and then anything can happen to change that. There are instances where he could start of being a student or be in his early years of his career and then later on is able to become the full provider. There are so many scenarios and as humans we are adaptive and should live our lives with that knowledge. When we walk into a marriage focusing on ourselves as individuals, and thinking only about our own rights, we become engrossed with what is missing and what we are not receiving. Our focus should be on being the best we can and fulfilling as many responsibilities. This, inevitably shifts our mindset to what are we not doing instead of viewing our partner’s actions or lack of actions. We should be ambitious, seeking knowledge and opportunities whilst having tawakkul. That’s always been the way as the Hadith goes: “Tie your camel first whilst placing your trust in Allah”. It can be easy to foster negativity but it is important to have good opinions of one another and Muslims seeking marriage should have manageable expectations and standards. However, if we do have high standards, we must be of that calibre too. I reiterate that any Muslim striving to please Allah will live and use this Dunya as a tool to get to the final destination which ever pathway is taken. I don’t think I geared to any one specifically as life isn’t black and white, so we can’t treat it as such.
To add to that, we all have different ambitions and desires so I don’t think we can apply the same rule for everyone. Sometimes we have the habit of projecting our mentality on everyone else and think we should live the same life, aspire to that and teach everyone to do the same (not directing to anyone on the podcast) but what I’ve seen outside generally. As well as thinking that what is popular on social media is how a lot of people are which isn’t always the case. Of course the horror stories are common knowledge and we are afraid that will happen to us but we should be hopeful whilst taking precautions. Understand people and understand yourself. This will be useful for any relationship and more so in a marriage. Some people may always want a certain lifestyle and it would be unfair for one person to sacrifice so much for the other. In this case, being a 100% provider could be harmful. Or, a woman may have a better paying job but has found a man that is moral, upright and compatible person etc etc. People’s priorities differ and to object is not right either. We have a big problem with ego and insecurity and to fuel this fire can be dangerous. Men and women must build their self esteem and value so that when a situation arises they are ready to combat however the need requires them to do so. There are men who have become redundant and they weren’t strong enough in their ‘masculinity’ that they started being horrid husbands because they felt inferior. Having said that, women must also nurture their nafs to not become resentful or spiteful. We will have different trials in life and our test will be how we react.
70/30 I totally agree with that. Yes my husband should be able to take care of me financially BUT everybody goes through phases in life loosing the job - getting injured so I would gladly help out with the 30 since I’m his wife.
Stop making excuses for grown men. You should keep 100% and stop dealing with men that want you to come out of your pocket. If you allow them to use you then you’ll be bled dry 🙄.
@@sholay706so let me get this straight. The wife should contribute and then cook and clean and look after the kids and the husband? She does not have to contribute any money and if she does then the good deed is on her.
There was mention that the expectations that women have from men are very high, the guy needs to financially support her ( that would naturally include spending money) but each to their own and being protectors and providing security. Am I missing the other expectations??? What do some women expect from their spouses that is too much?
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Here's a few that men mention.. Financial comfort Emotional awareness Always Available Flawless Decision-Maker Romantic Hero Super Dad Unbreakable Strength Instant Transformation Leader yet compromises by woman making core decisions (irony) There's plenty more😅
In a healthy relationship, financial contribution should not undermine mutual respect. When both partners contribute-whether financially, emotionally, or through household responsibilities-there should be an understanding of shared effort and respect for each other's roles. If a woman is contributing financially, it's only fair to expect her partner to contribute equally to household responsibilities. The idea that financial contribution leads to disrespect or tension often stems from outdated gender norms that undervalue women's labor, whether it's paid work or unpaid work at home. It's not selfish to seek balance and fairness-it’s about fostering equality and mutual respect. These discussions shouldn’t paint women as selfish; rather, they should challenge stereotypes and encourage healthy dynamics where both partners support each other in all aspects of life.
I am not sure why the term “disrespect” is being used by the brothers.. from how I see it that’s not disrespect but rather resentment. Resentment grows within any relationship if one partner is the one constantly doing more than the other. It is a basic human response to feel wronged and complain if you are the one financially providing (even if only 50%, 30% etc) while also being taken for granted to fulfil all the other duties as a female on your own (homemaking, cooking, cleaning, childbirth and raring etc). Surely, the male will also feel resentment to his partner if he is expected to provide 100% financially AND do 50% (or 30%) of all chores and childcare while the female only does 50% of housework and does not provide anything else. It is not him “disrespecting” the female if he complains but his natural reaction to the unfairness of his situation in the marriage. Boiling down the natural resentment of young women who (unlike their mothers and grandmothers) are expected to be both providers (at least 50% due to today’s economy) and 100% homemakers (so basically “super mums”) into “she is disrespecting me” feels disingenuous to me. Otherwise, great podcast, I enjoyed the takes of everyone involved. I hope as a community we do find solutions to the rising challenges of newer generations instead of forcing them to be like those before them, when they are in completely different circumstances. 😊
@@Landx77 this was a great read! You make good points. This is a complex discussion but you are right, our community needs to move forward, not hold resentment between men and women. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for taking the time out to comment.
Great discussion brothers, It doesn’t work on percentages boys. The man is the sole provider but with time & changes in circumstances the wife can often contribute. It’s a partnership of compassion & mutual respect. The man should help out in the house regardless (As the prophet SAW did). Likewise the wife may contribute as long as it’s not compulsory on her or expected by the man. A respectful person is respectful in all circumstances.
Man I love this discussion! Especially the long hair brother, he has my perspective, if you ain't got it, don't get married or prepare for the disrespect in 90% of situations
I wish more people would invest in their marriage BEFORE they start getting problems, pre marital coaching doesn’t guarantee anything but many times it will help to avoid some basic mistakes and create good habits, this is why I set up my pre marital coaching program
I’m only saying this - there are Muslims who will have the perspective that respect won’t be lost by a woman paying 50/50. For some maybe, but for me, as someone who really loves my husband, I can’t see a reason why we wouldn’t both contribute if we are both earning money - especially in today’s society. We need to move with the times. And that’s the end of it - money plays a very small part in the dynamics of our overall relationship. But that’s just me - seems like I’ll be in the minority on that based on what I’ve heard and the comments so far, but just thought worth sharing anyway 😊
@ not being asked but it was almost implicit (and I wouldn’t want it any other way) given we earn similar amounts. Thanks for sharing your views btw and I think it’s great to hear from Muslim brothers - especially with a younger brother (early 20s) - I think he would really value everything you have to say
@@illy_6 thank you for your kind words. We know our episodes can be quite heated and funny but we intend on bringing a lot of issues to light and help people - especially young men.
@@illy_6I don't like this narrative of "moving with the times" as if to say Islam isn't timeless. If you want to work and contribute, Islam says that's the wife's prerogative and fine to do so. But it isn't forced upon her as the wajib is on the man to provide necessities (i.e. bills, reasonable food and clothes). I get good deeds if I do. But to be expected to covertly or overtly isn't from the deen. If a wife wants extra luxuries that's a different conversation, but for basic necessities I don't think even in this economy a wife should be expected to (unless she wants forgo that right). And muslim women shouldn't be shamed for not "moving with the times" .
If a man was struggling financially and expected his wife to contribute. Honestly, overtime I would lose respect for him. The expectation is to marry a man who can lead the family and In order for him to qualify for that status he would need to have the necessary skills and attributes i.e being financially capable/ responsible and strive to do better.
The sharia mandates the husband pay maintenance regardless of anyone's opinion. Even if the wife pays for everything, the cost of the maintenance is still owed.
Thank you guys. Nice one again. 70/30 is hilarious. You are talking about Muslim marriage but yet you forgot the prophet Hadith يا معشر الشباب من استطاع منكم الباءة فليتزوج ومن لم يستطع فعليه بالصوم فإنه له وجاء. That means Muaz was on top of it. Technical point: tell Yahia to stop knocking on the table and try not to talk over each others.
A young man in this day and age is facing with soo much temptation that even fasting is even harder than ever before. I agree with the 70/30 for various reasons. it gives the man the opportunity to cover majority of his responsibilities while being in a halaal relationship. That being said , the man should do his ultimate best to cover for everything to the best of his abilities. Rome wasn't built in one day and a man doesn't become a man until his 40's. So 70/30 is a good approach to encourage young men to be in a halal relationship.
Jzk for the hadith, full hadith translated for the English speakers is as follows: "Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to us: 'oh young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes (from casting evil glances) and preserves one from immorality; but he who cannot afford It should observe fast for it is a means of controlling the sexual desire.'' Sahih Muslim However, this does not in my opinion negate the fact it is allowed to gain financial contribution from a wife especially in the circumstances where the woman is richer (perhaps through inheritance or business acumen) and the man is trying. Furthermore, this does not make the man less of a man as manhood/masculinity is not determined by just finances. We are not talking about the ideal situation, yes the man has to be the provider! It's a fact the Prophet (SAW) received financial contribution from his wife Khadija bint Khuwaylid (rd). The mother of the believers, Khadijah bint Khuwaylid (rd) was extremely wealthy for her time, her financial support was instrumental in the early years of Islam. Some even say the Prophet (saw) was able to take leisure to meditate in the mountains for a month at a time due to the wealth of Khadijah. Finally, yeah Yayha stop knocking on the table and let me land. :)
@@oj2775then relocate to an affordable place, modern times is no excuse to not do wajib. Unless youre disabled or ill. This why women think men of this era are weak. They arent willing to make any sacrifices.
@@SayfStreamyes, but it's only if the wife wants to contribute to bills. Some muslim men expect women to contribute out of Rahma which isn't right whether she is wealthy or not - the decision is the woman's alone, not the community, husband or family.
Those muslims who were fortunate enough to have parents who stayed together would have seen how their parents navigated through marriage but they dont want to live according to that traditional model. Young women love their mums but they dont want to be like their mums, which I think is pretty disrespectful. Boys from broken homes often grow up seeing 'wonder mum' manage everything so expect their wives to do everything and take a back seat. A lot of these modern wives with secular values are constantly challenging the authority of their husband so there's no wonder there are a lot of unhappy homes. It all comes down to feminism being a cancer to healthy, loving families.
It's not disrespectful. The mothers themselves dont want their daugters to be like them hence why they push for them to go to university/have careers prior to marriage so they dont get stuck in abusive/unhappy marriages like some of them. Some women don't want to be like their mothers and suffer the same fate. That's all. Other than, most would love to be like their mothers. Most do not crave certain life experiences their mother's endured. And some men qant another mother, not a wife. Which is the fate these girls don't want.
There is this obsession with 50-50 honestly stop 50-50 and look at healthy ways as to how a woman can contribute. What about 7030 or 80/20 we don’t need to stick to 50-50 for women to contribute. most women contribute to lifestyle aspects. in my marriage my husband pays for our main bills and house and groceries and I pay for the lifestyle aspects such as going out, holidays, Tuition for my kids . we are a team and 2gether we make our marriage work and the finances work in our marriage if a woman works, she should contribute otherwise is she just buying handbags for herself?
@@MrsDDS-123 thank you for sharing your personal situation. It seems like you've got things figured out. What is great about your situation is that your husband is covering all of the NEEDS and you are covering the WANTS - that's lovely!
@@Triple-ATalksthats rights- its ‘needs vs wants’ and this is where we are getting confused. Even with ‘needs’ there are lots of levels. One wife may be happy with a two bed for her husband and 2 kids, another may say 3 or 4 bed is sufficient- so theres alot of compromises to do. The girl who gets the four bed in London is probably paying half the rent/ mortgage cs thats her dream home or it could be her husband paying all the rent/ mortgage because he can afford it. Every situation is different and all this 50-50 battle is so limited now there needs to be more discussion and practical solutions around this. However no women should be paying 50% or more and working long hours for a poor standard of life, here the man is probably taking advantage’, her income should be to better their marriage and bring peace and unity. Also I think women especially after having children are more likely to work part time and actually since Covid a lot of places do offer flexible working hours especially working at home so women can manage household, childcare and working. I have always worked part time. I currently work three days , and the two days that I am not working, I use those days to do all my cooking and my kids appointments. I have a nice system that works for me. my husband looks after the main expenses and I look after a lot of lifestyle aspects including second car. we have a stable life together. It’s taken a lot to get to the agreement and even now and then I do have to remind him that it’s not my duty to pay for any bills because I do feel like sometimes he does make the comment ‘you don’t pay for bills’ , but where we are now has taken years to come to this point. I also know woman whose husband’s look after all the finances. The ones that are really well off honestly I do envy them because their husbands give them beautiful things as well as all the necessities and at the same time I know husbands who look after all the finances but there needs to be some compromises on lifestyle aspects. These are situations with kids involved, single and no kids- you can live in a one bed and travel, eat out, save, etc. Also, I wanted to add that my husband is helpful around the house. I don’t expect him to cook or clean on his four knees however occasionally he may help me with the mopping because I need his male strength for that. And he also washes his own plate and collect his laundry . He would have to do that anyway even if I wasn’t working because there are some housework aspects that should be standard for men to do. And even if i was a housewife, id expect some takeaway cs it’s exhausting cooking every meal and nowadays takeaway and eating out is normal. If i worked full time, it only be because he will need help in paying for essential bills and and should that be the incase, he would he in his four knees or pay £15 hourly for a cleaner. In a nutshelll, if a woman does contribute whether it is 20%, 30% or 40% whatever it is, it’s her decision and it’s to make life better. Her percentage in payments could actually bring more peace in the house and if she is a secure woman, she will appreciate herself for this contribution she makes and feel good about it and respectfully remind her husband to not take advantage of her mercy, as he can Work like a dog 80 hours a week but she probably doesn’t want him to because she prefers to share some of the workload so that they can have better peace within their marriage and their home, and have a father who spends time with children. Anyone who is adamant that a wife who works pays nothing, whilst having kids and ready to leave her marriage, if thats your main issue, youre probably better paying a percentage towards the upkeep of your life than be single mum and looking after yourself 100% even with government handouts. Also dont focus so much on percentages rather than focus on aspect, like im going to pay for my kids clothes, clubs, second car, etc.
Never 50/50, Just set things for each other like The man Pays the rent , bills and the women Can Pay for groceries etc.. once you go 50/50 it causes problems
@@DOMIN8RRR thank you for the feedback! Regarding your request, we don't feel qualified to preach on that level. But in future we do want to get a student of knowledge as a guest and get him to discuss with us some of these points.
@@Triple-ATalks that would be really good - understand what you mean. Keep the uploads consistent on genuine talking points and you guys will do very well :)
Respectfully you man, especially the Somali brother, are a bit delusional. £35k in London is what £2.5k a month after tax, student loans, etc? Rent + house bills are at least £1.5-£2k a month then add food, transportation, internet/phone, etc. You're left with £50-£100 if lucky. Then he says to leave London, as if it is that easy to get up and relocate hundreds of miles from your family. + You need a deposit (£2k min) for a house and a job in the new town. And you haven't even mentioned that wages are lower outside London so you'll be in the same situation out there. Alhamdulillah, I've got a remote job but most the people around me don't and cannot just up and leave like the brother says. Last thing akh, to say people are not ambitious because they don't have a salary over £35k is a bit mad when average (google what average means) is £44k in London. That number is skewed only because there's soo many high earners here. So many people are working hard driving your buses, Ubers, and working in restaurants earn £30k or less but you saying they lack ambition is wild to me.
JazakAllahu khairan for sharing your opinion. You’ve made some good points, and it’s always good to encourage healthy debates so we can find solutions as a Muslim community. Some people have things figured out, and others are still working on it-and that’s okay. Let’s keep the constructive criticism coming and build each other up.
Fr, surprised by the lack of understanding on the relocation part. Would expect this from young lads in their early 20s. It's hard to make serious money nowadays. Maybe they're surrounded by money men, they kind of just live in a bubble.
@@Triple-ATalks Apologies akh if it came across as a rude comment but I just had to be honest. It came across as though you guys were being condescending to the older generations like our fathers who struggled hard to allow us to have an education, paying for tuition to put ourselves in positions to get good jobs, to build wealth by not making us pay rent etc allowing us to be in this privileged position. Some of the older generation worked 2/3 jobs to put food on the table. Even people nowadays are working 2/3 jobs, studying at night-time and they still can't get a high paying job / or fail at creating a business. Ofc there are those who are chilling at home but I'm not talking about them. Insha'Allah everything goes well with you man's podcast.
LOLLLL £35k is high?? Are you okay? You have to live way below your means to live on that income in London even as a single person. Rent alone is £1200 in London without bills? What you left with? If you’re a male and that’s the mentality then I wonder if your spending purposely is very very low or you live with parents and once you get married with that income, life is gonna hit you hard boy. I doubt you’re married OR live in London.
Guys if you want to see more of the gang and some personal stories then check out the latest episode 👇🏾 ua-cam.com/video/okJIXTvmUYI/v-deo.htmlsi=MoPr0j8Z3mnnwGoG
Some constructive feedback. It's not a bad podcast but the black brother needs to wait until the other finish talks before he talks. The mic's are loud and it was annoying hearing all of you speak at the same time so often.
It goes both ways, a lot of Muslim men want women who don’t care about money and are willing to provide. Those same men would never change a diaper or make a sandwich. I’ve seen that so many times, women will do 50/50 with their husbands and still be the sole home maker. It’s sad how some Muslim men think this way
I just came across your channel . The topic is very valid for today’s time . People are going through difficulties. A little laughter is fine but more focus should be b given how to navigate these problems
Them two being interviewed loved their views. They bangali guy is absolutely talking trash. Is not educated at all on emotional awareness and womens needs. I hardly ever comment on vids ...but as i was watching this my blood was boiling. Please get rid of the bangali guy he is missleading others . 😅. !!!
@Triple-ATalks basically - him saying a course on marriage is baseless . Using the look around you at relatives marriages etc shohld be enough to learn etc. 5050 scenario - didnt like his justification. They will probz be more didnt finish watching it bcz he just put me off. As someone who deals with women going thru divorce and helping them navigate their thoughts , it just useless and pointless having someone like that talk about women marriages and expectations. Hes undoing other peoples hard work in trying help youngsters and the older generation on the meaning of marriage. Marriage is a life long commitment to bettering urself helping ur spouse and brining up good kids to help make the world better. He needs to use islam as his navigating tool not his cultural nonsense. His justifications are not educational pointers what i mean to say is he needs to learn how to portray his opinion and not talk like hes from the streets back home. 😊 Sorry not sorry.
@@RS-vz2my thank you for sharing that feedback. It was a little more constructive than the original comment. Debate and discussing different opinions must be conducted in a healthy way. Maybe Sayf will expand his views in the Part 2.
Sayf is saying he has been misinterpreted and misunderstood! Please have a look at his clarification video reacting to the backlash: ua-cam.com/video/okf9r528Nr0/v-deo.htmlsi=EAcXP2mi99NNbgQP
(Or check his page @Sayfstream)
Emotional maturity is key for a healthy relationship. You are a team. Mutual respect. Not dictatorship
@@SK-xo4br great feedback thank you, and yes emotional maturity is vital for both.
But regarding dictatorship, every team has a captain, a leader, someone in charge.. No?
Your best episode so far !! This was realistic, informative yet totally entertaining !
Beautiful comment and thrilled you enjoyed it but what’s your opinion on the matter? Who did you agree with?
@@Triple-ATalksim a married woman and completely agree with Muaz. 100% the man. It’s my Islamic right and I’m not giving it up x
@@Violety94yeah i realised a year ago that our job as a man is just to make as much money as possible for the family even if it kills us. We aren't going to find mercy from our wives even for a short time, she will bring it up forever in the future
As a woman, I felt so frustrated while watching this. You are essentially expecting a woman to forgo her Islamic right of being financially supported whilst insisting that your Islamic right to be the leader of the household is respected. The brother who said expecting your wife to contribute financially reduces her respect for you is spot on. I want to view my future husband (in sha' Allah) as a leader and protector, thus it's natural to feel he's not fulfilling his basic duties if I'm also contributing. I wish brothers would view this differently.. If upon getting to know a sister for marriage, she tells you she is infertile, I assume most Muslim men would not marry her, EVEN THOUGH with Allah's will and trust in his power, this can very well change and he can bless them with children in the future. If a man's goal is to start a family, then this is valid, and It's the same for women. We are aware that a man's role in the family is to provide and protect as they are the qawam of the household, therefore, I expect that he can do those things from the get-go. I do not want a rich man, I simply want to live comfortably in sha' Allah, and if anything affects his finances in the future, like illness or redundancy, then as a wife it's my duty to stick beside him and help in any way I can if he allows me. By this time, I would have already gained respect for him as a hard-working provider and loyalty is what would keep me.
Nonetheless, I don't think a Muslim man should approach a sister for marriage with the proposal of her financially contributing, because we already know that nine times out of ten, we will also be the ones covering most of the household duties like cooking and cleaning or time with children. Besides, a man should have more gheerah for his wife working around other males anyway. Thanks for reading my TED Talk✌🏼
@@Hajar1.1.1 This was a great read! A Ted talk indeed 😄 Thank you for taking the time out to give that feedback 👍🏾
You bleed 7 day out of the month. I can get my full rights from you 1/4 of the month.
Spot on.
when discussing women working, men ALWAYS talk about her money and how she should share it or not with the family, but they never discuss housework and how they are going to do some chores as well. even though their job as providers is non negotiable while woman doing housework is circumstantial.
Hun. A lot of what you wrote was right but honestly just some advise. Try to shorten your paragraphs. Not many people will read all your important points and loose focus if you keep going on and on and on. We’re living in times where 15 seconds video is stimulating. Not 15 mins or 30 mins.
Thanks for this conversation, called off my nikah because of this 50 50 mentality.
@@ayanelmi3405 Is this for real? If so really sorry to hear this. Was he asking you to pay 50% of bills? Also hopefully you took the necessary steps and took advice from elders and wiser people.
@@Triple-ATalks Yes, it's foreal. He had expectations and was clearly violating our sunnah and therefore my rights, that was a breach- i lost the respect as you said. He knew exactly what my POV was from the 1st month of talking, decided to talk about 1 week before the weeding and it was a no no for me.
@@ayanelmi3405 men should definitely be open and honest with their intentions from the beginning. But maybe he was so interested in you that he felt shy to disclose that vital information.
Just for clarification did this happen after you watched our episode or before it?
We encourage all brothers and sisters to know their rights and if they wish to relinquish any of them then they know the consequences.
To all readers and watchers, just a reminder, we are not preachers or dawa guys, we are just regular Muslim men giving our opinions on everyday life.
@@Triple-ATalks I really don't think there should be excuses for this behaviour PERIOD. This happened before I watched the podcast. The issue with the marriage crisis is because of men and women just choosing to be neglectful of their responsibilities that was ordained to them by Allah and choosing to be delusional and act like non believers. There's a lot of blind people leading the blind, and it's up to us to not be deceived, but that comes with experience.
@@ayanelmi3405 you make a great point. May Allah give you the spouse that is best for you 🤲🏽
Solid point ! Research consistently shows that education plays a key role in reducing divorce rates. Educated individuals often have a clearer understanding of the dynamics of healthy relationships, better communication skills, and more effective conflict resolution strategies. Just as success in any field requires training and knowledge, thriving in marriage requires an understanding of its core components, such as emotional connection, mutual respect, and shared goals. Many marriages fail not because of a lack of love, but due to a lack of awareness and preparation. Education provides the tools to build clarity, understanding, and resilience, helping couples navigate challenges and grow together.
@@sarahbegum2192 preach sister!
My perspective is a bit different. Today's educstion is designed to instill a sense of superiority and arrogamce and I say this as a degree educated individual. A Univeristy of Michigan study found that university students are far less empathetic than their predecessors in the 1960s. Another study found the medical education system made doctors less emapthetic. Today's education doesnt teach you critical thinking, wisdom or problem solving or mediation. It has simply become a symbol of prestige and success. Girls with degrees wont even consider a man without a degree. Our grandparents did not have degrees but they had wisdom to make a marriage work. Today's generation has degrees but lack empathy towards the spouse to make the marriage work.
Guys if you want to see more of the gang and some personal stories then check out the latest episode 👇🏾
ua-cam.com/video/okJIXTvmUYI/v-deo.htmlsi=MoPr0j8Z3mnnwGoG
Can you substantiate your claim with some sources. I read online that those with more education especially degree level have a higher rate of divorce (usually argue more). If your referring to Islamic education and marriage rights, i know a few alima/knowledge sisters that have had bitter divorces. The knowledge went down the drain.
Anyway, kindly have a look at my video for clarity: ua-cam.com/video/iIOTtg-4ZhI/v-deo.html
New subscriber here, I literally sat and watched the whole podcast, and honestly my opinion goes in line with brother Muaz, it’s solely about education and the lack thereof which leads to significant issues within a marriage. I believe if a man wants to get married he needs to be in a position to provide and support his household for 100% of the utilities and bills. If he can’t do that when he shouldn’t expect luxury or “king” treatment from his wife if he’s not providing. It’s that simple. Come on brothers we need to do better and be that man who deserves a woman who wants to look after us and treat us good.
@@akhi_zayd welcome to this new and growing community brother. And excellent point you made! Thank you for sharing 👊🏽💪🏽
Its agreed that men pay for the utilities,
Bills, house but what about a women who likes a beautiful home and clothes and exceeds his budget? Should he work to provide her comfort or should she contribute and pay for her quality of life. Money goes beyond just bills now, it always had, but more now due to the constant bombardment of materialism.
Looooool! 70/30. Good banter and discussion! I think everyone made relevant points. Realistically, have to look at circumstances and personalities too. We are not all of the same disposition so what works for one, wouldn't work for another. We should be introspective and educated to do what is best for both parties. There's always the rule and then the exception in any case.
@@amaniislam3838 great points BUT what is YOUR view??
@ By default men should be the 100% providers but circumstances will determine how reality plays out.
All situations are nuanced so we must always analyse and apply the most correct solution.
Men must be upfront about their financial status and the women can make a decision based on that and be introspective and honest with themselves.
Marriage is a companionship and both genders should be coming together with the idea that they are making a life together for the sake of Allah and the hereafter. We must be merciful and work as a team, to nurture, build and develop love and affection.
A man can start off being the full provider and then anything can happen to change that. There are instances where he could start of being a student or be in his early years of his career and then later on is able to become the full provider. There are so many scenarios and as humans we are adaptive and should live our lives with that knowledge.
When we walk into a marriage focusing on ourselves as individuals, and thinking only about our own rights, we become engrossed with what is missing and what we are not receiving.
Our focus should be on being the best we can and fulfilling as many responsibilities. This, inevitably shifts our mindset to what are we not doing instead of viewing our partner’s actions or lack of actions.
We should be ambitious, seeking knowledge and opportunities whilst having tawakkul. That’s always been the way as the Hadith goes: “Tie your camel first whilst placing your trust in Allah”.
It can be easy to foster negativity but it is important to have good opinions of one another and Muslims seeking marriage should have manageable expectations and standards. However, if we do have high standards, we must be of that calibre too.
I reiterate that any Muslim striving to please Allah will live and use this Dunya as a tool to get to the final destination which ever pathway is taken.
I don’t think I geared to any one specifically as life isn’t black and white, so we can’t treat it as such.
To add to that, we all have different ambitions and desires so I don’t think we can apply the same rule for everyone.
Sometimes we have the habit of projecting our mentality on everyone else and think we should live the same life, aspire to that and teach everyone to do the same (not directing to anyone on the podcast) but what I’ve seen outside generally. As well as thinking that what is popular on social media is how a lot of people are which isn’t always the case.
Of course the horror stories are common knowledge and we are afraid that will happen to us but we should be hopeful whilst taking precautions.
Understand people and understand yourself. This will be useful for any relationship and more so in a marriage.
Some people may always want a certain lifestyle and it would be unfair for one person to sacrifice so much for the other.
In this case, being a 100% provider could be harmful. Or, a woman may have a better paying job but has found a man that is moral, upright and compatible person etc etc. People’s priorities differ and to object is not right either.
We have a big problem with ego and insecurity and to fuel this fire can be dangerous.
Men and women must build their self esteem and value so that when a situation arises they are ready to combat however the need requires them to do so.
There are men who have become redundant and they weren’t strong enough in their ‘masculinity’ that they started being horrid husbands because they felt inferior. Having said that, women must also nurture their nafs to not become resentful or spiteful. We will have different trials in life and our test will be how we react.
@@amaniislam3838 wow what a great response. Thank you so much for sharing.
70/30 I totally agree with that. Yes my husband should be able to take care of me financially BUT everybody goes through phases in life loosing the job - getting injured so I would gladly help out with the 30 since I’m his wife.
@@TiwaSavage789 you seem like a solid wife 👍🏽
Stop making excuses for grown men. You should keep 100% and stop dealing with men that want you to come out of your pocket. If you allow them to use you then you’ll be bled dry 🙄.
The question is they wife should not work. If the wife wants to work then she should contribute.
@@msefelps interesting point!
@@sholay706so let me get this straight. The wife should contribute and then cook and clean and look after the kids and the husband? She does not have to contribute any money and if she does then the good deed is on her.
There was mention that the expectations that women have from men are very high, the guy needs to financially support her ( that would naturally include spending money) but each to their own and being protectors and providing security. Am I missing the other expectations??? What do some women expect from their spouses that is too much?
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Here's a few that men mention..
Financial comfort
Emotional awareness
Always Available
Flawless Decision-Maker
Romantic Hero
Super Dad
Unbreakable Strength
Instant Transformation
Leader yet compromises by woman making core decisions (irony)
There's plenty more😅
In a healthy relationship, financial contribution should not undermine mutual respect. When both partners contribute-whether financially, emotionally, or through household responsibilities-there should be an understanding of shared effort and respect for each other's roles.
If a woman is contributing financially, it's only fair to expect her partner to contribute equally to household responsibilities. The idea that financial contribution leads to disrespect or tension often stems from outdated gender norms that undervalue women's labor, whether it's paid work or unpaid work at home. It's not selfish to seek balance and fairness-it’s about fostering equality and mutual respect.
These discussions shouldn’t paint women as selfish; rather, they should challenge stereotypes and encourage healthy dynamics where both partners support each other in all aspects of life.
@@amalmohamed3646 great points and thanks for the comment BUT... who do you agree with?
@@Triple-ATalks A bit of what Yahya has said, the needs to develop himself and work hard to provide a good life to his family.
@@amalmohamed3646 fair enough 👏🏽
Exactly, men only want to share finances but never house hold work. Then they wonder why the woman looses respect for them.
If you can't provide for a wife , don't get married.
This was Muaz's point exactly
I am not sure why the term “disrespect” is being used by the brothers.. from how I see it that’s not disrespect but rather resentment.
Resentment grows within any relationship if one partner is the one constantly doing more than the other. It is a basic human response to feel wronged and complain if you are the one financially providing (even if only 50%, 30% etc) while also being taken for granted to fulfil all the other duties as a female on your own (homemaking, cooking, cleaning, childbirth and raring etc).
Surely, the male will also feel resentment to his partner if he is expected to provide 100% financially AND do 50% (or 30%) of all chores and childcare while the female only does 50% of housework and does not provide anything else. It is not him “disrespecting” the female if he complains but his natural reaction to the unfairness of his situation in the marriage.
Boiling down the natural resentment of young women who (unlike their mothers and grandmothers) are expected to be both providers (at least 50% due to today’s economy) and 100% homemakers (so basically “super mums”) into “she is disrespecting me” feels disingenuous to me.
Otherwise, great podcast, I enjoyed the takes of everyone involved. I hope as a community we do find solutions to the rising challenges of newer generations instead of forcing them to be like those before them, when they are in completely different circumstances. 😊
@@Landx77 this was a great read! You make good points. This is a complex discussion but you are right, our community needs to move forward, not hold resentment between men and women.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for taking the time out to comment.
Great discussion brothers, It doesn’t work on percentages boys. The man is the sole provider but with time & changes in circumstances the wife can often contribute. It’s a partnership of compassion & mutual respect. The man should help out in the house regardless (As the prophet SAW did). Likewise the wife may contribute as long as it’s not compulsory on her or expected by the man. A respectful person is respectful in all circumstances.
@@heshammohamed2990 great comment 👏🏽
So who do you side with the most? 👀
Man I love this discussion! Especially the long hair brother, he has my perspective, if you ain't got it, don't get married or prepare for the disrespect in 90% of situations
@@CPTZK11 great point!
I wish more people would invest in their marriage BEFORE they start getting problems, pre marital coaching doesn’t guarantee anything but many times it will help to avoid some basic mistakes and create good habits, this is why I set up my pre marital coaching program
@@iNikkah great point! Please share your details by DM'ing us on the Instagram account
What’s your IG handle?
Triplea.talks
Women back in the day couldn’t leave due to society, finances etc didn’t Mean they were loyal.
That's an interesting point!
Nah the host needs to take the national exam respectfully 😂
@@poeticjustice9649 what are you trying to say?!😅
I’m only saying this - there are Muslims who will have the perspective that respect won’t be lost by a woman paying 50/50. For some maybe, but for me, as someone who really loves my husband, I can’t see a reason why we wouldn’t both contribute if we are both earning money - especially in today’s society. We need to move with the times. And that’s the end of it - money plays a very small part in the dynamics of our overall relationship. But that’s just me - seems like I’ll be in the minority on that based on what I’ve heard and the comments so far, but just thought worth sharing anyway 😊
@@illy_6 thank you for sharing. The question is... Are you being asked to contribute to bills?
@ not being asked but it was almost implicit (and I wouldn’t want it any other way) given we earn similar amounts. Thanks for sharing your views btw and I think it’s great to hear from Muslim brothers - especially with a younger brother (early 20s) - I think he would really value everything you have to say
You’re defo a sane woman in this comment section lmao
@@illy_6 thank you for your kind words. We know our episodes can be quite heated and funny but we intend on bringing a lot of issues to light and help people - especially young men.
@@illy_6I don't like this narrative of "moving with the times" as if to say Islam isn't timeless. If you want to work and contribute, Islam says that's the wife's prerogative and fine to do so. But it isn't forced upon her as the wajib is on the man to provide necessities (i.e. bills, reasonable food and clothes). I get good deeds if I do. But to be expected to covertly or overtly isn't from the deen. If a wife wants extra luxuries that's a different conversation, but for basic necessities I don't think even in this economy a wife should be expected to (unless she wants forgo that right). And muslim women shouldn't be shamed for not "moving with the times" .
If a man was struggling financially and expected his wife to contribute. Honestly, overtime I would lose respect for him. The expectation is to marry a man who can lead the family and In order for him to qualify for that status he would need to have the necessary skills and attributes i.e being financially capable/ responsible and strive to do better.
Great point!
The sharia mandates the husband pay maintenance regardless of anyone's opinion. Even if the wife pays for everything, the cost of the maintenance is still owed.
@@_zaaphiel great point. So would you agree with some of the other comments of: man covers needs and woman covers wants?
@ the husband really should cover both unless he is unable to cover non-necessities.
@@_zaaphiel what if the wife wants a designer bag? 😱
@ if you can afford it your should buy it
@@_zaaphiel many will call you delusional! But thank you for sharing your views
Thank you guys. Nice one again. 70/30 is hilarious. You are talking about Muslim marriage but yet you forgot the prophet Hadith يا معشر الشباب من استطاع منكم الباءة فليتزوج ومن لم يستطع فعليه بالصوم فإنه له وجاء. That means Muaz was on top of it.
Technical point: tell Yahia to stop knocking on the table and try not to talk over each others.
A young man in this day and age is facing with soo much temptation that even fasting is even harder than ever before. I agree with the 70/30 for various reasons. it gives the man the opportunity to cover majority of his responsibilities while being in a halaal relationship. That being said , the man should do his ultimate best to cover for everything to the best of his abilities. Rome wasn't built in one day and a man doesn't become a man until his 40's. So 70/30 is a good approach to encourage young men to be in a halal relationship.
Jzk for the hadith, full hadith translated for the English speakers is as follows: "Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to us: 'oh young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes (from casting evil glances) and preserves one from immorality; but he who cannot afford It should observe fast for it is a means of controlling the sexual desire.'' Sahih Muslim
However, this does not in my opinion negate the fact it is allowed to gain financial contribution from a wife especially in the circumstances where the woman is richer (perhaps through inheritance or business acumen) and the man is trying. Furthermore, this does not make the man less of a man as manhood/masculinity is not determined by just finances.
We are not talking about the ideal situation, yes the man has to be the provider!
It's a fact the Prophet (SAW) received financial contribution from his wife Khadija bint Khuwaylid (rd). The mother of the believers, Khadijah bint Khuwaylid (rd) was extremely wealthy for her time, her financial support was instrumental in the early years of Islam. Some even say the Prophet (saw) was able to take leisure to meditate in the mountains for a month at a time due to the wealth of Khadijah.
Finally, yeah Yayha stop knocking on the table and let me land. :)
@@oj2775then relocate to an affordable place, modern times is no excuse to not do wajib. Unless youre disabled or ill. This why women think men of this era are weak. They arent willing to make any sacrifices.
@@SayfStreamyes, but it's only if the wife wants to contribute to bills. Some muslim men expect women to contribute out of Rahma which isn't right whether she is wealthy or not - the decision is the woman's alone, not the community, husband or family.
Those muslims who were fortunate enough to have parents who stayed together would have seen how their parents navigated through marriage but they dont want to live according to that traditional model. Young women love their mums but they dont want to be like their mums, which I think is pretty disrespectful. Boys from broken homes often grow up seeing 'wonder mum' manage everything so expect their wives to do everything and take a back seat. A lot of these modern wives with secular values are constantly challenging the authority of their husband so there's no wonder there are a lot of unhappy homes. It all comes down to feminism being a cancer to healthy, loving families.
@@foziajalali2288 wow we need to get you on the show!
It's not disrespectful. The mothers themselves dont want their daugters to be like them hence why they push for them to go to university/have careers prior to marriage so they dont get stuck in abusive/unhappy marriages like some of them.
Some women don't want to be like their mothers and suffer the same fate. That's all.
Other than, most would love to be like their mothers. Most do not crave certain life experiences their mother's endured.
And some men qant another mother, not a wife. Which is the fate these girls don't want.
Cant reply to your comment but yeah good women have no issue with leadership. Proper leadership that doesnt come from a place of ego.
@@sk3440 great point, thank you for sharing your view
There is this obsession with 50-50 honestly stop 50-50 and look at healthy ways as to how a woman can contribute. What about 7030 or 80/20 we don’t need to stick to 50-50 for women to contribute. most women contribute to lifestyle aspects. in my marriage my husband pays for our main bills and house and groceries and I pay for the lifestyle aspects such as going out, holidays, Tuition for my kids . we are a team and 2gether we make our marriage work and the finances work in our marriage if a woman works, she should contribute otherwise is she just buying handbags for herself?
@@MrsDDS-123 thank you for sharing your personal situation. It seems like you've got things figured out. What is great about your situation is that your husband is covering all of the NEEDS and you are covering the WANTS - that's lovely!
@@Triple-ATalksthats rights- its ‘needs vs wants’ and this is where we are getting confused. Even with ‘needs’ there are lots of levels. One wife may be happy with a two bed for her husband and 2 kids, another may say 3 or 4 bed is sufficient- so theres alot of compromises to do. The girl who gets the four bed in London is probably paying half the rent/ mortgage cs thats her dream home or it could be her husband paying all the rent/ mortgage because he can afford it. Every situation is different and all this 50-50 battle is so limited now there needs to be more discussion and practical solutions around this. However no women should be paying 50% or more and working long hours for a poor standard of life, here the man is probably taking advantage’, her income should be to better their marriage and bring peace and unity.
Also I think women especially after having children are more likely to work part time and actually since Covid a lot of places do offer flexible working hours especially working at home so women can manage household, childcare and working. I have always worked part time. I currently work three days , and the two days that I am not working, I use those days to do all my cooking and my kids appointments. I have a nice system that works for me. my husband looks after the main expenses and I look after a lot of lifestyle aspects including second car. we have a stable life together. It’s taken a lot to get to the agreement and even now and then I do have to remind him that it’s not my duty to pay for any bills because I do feel like sometimes he does make the comment ‘you don’t pay for bills’ , but where we are now has taken years to come to this point. I also know woman whose husband’s look after all the finances. The ones that are really well off honestly I do envy them because their husbands give them beautiful things as well as all the necessities and at the same time I know husbands who look after all the finances but there needs to be some compromises on lifestyle aspects. These are situations with kids involved, single and no kids- you can live in a one bed and travel, eat out, save, etc.
Also, I wanted to add that my husband is helpful around the house. I don’t expect him to cook or clean on his four knees however occasionally he may help me with the mopping because I need his male strength for that. And he also washes his own plate and collect his laundry . He would have to do that anyway even if I wasn’t working because there are some housework aspects that should be standard for men to do. And even if i was a housewife, id expect some takeaway cs it’s exhausting cooking every meal and nowadays takeaway and eating out is normal. If i worked full time, it only be because he will need help in paying for essential bills and and should that be the incase, he would he in his four knees or pay £15 hourly for a cleaner.
In a nutshelll, if a woman does contribute whether it is 20%, 30% or 40% whatever it is, it’s her decision and it’s to make life better. Her percentage in payments could actually bring more peace in the house and if she is a secure woman, she will appreciate herself for this contribution she makes and feel good about it and respectfully remind her husband to not take advantage of her mercy, as he can
Work like a dog 80 hours a week but she probably doesn’t want him to because she prefers to share some of the workload so that they can have better peace within their marriage and their home, and have a father who spends time with children. Anyone who is adamant that a wife who works pays nothing, whilst having kids and ready to leave her marriage, if thats your main issue, youre probably better paying a percentage towards the upkeep of your life than be single mum and looking after yourself 100% even with government handouts. Also dont focus so much on percentages rather than focus on aspect, like im going to pay for my kids clothes, clubs, second car, etc.
@@MrsDDS-123 wow what a comment! This needs an entire episode to talk about your points 😅
@@hellomynameiszack that's a great shout bro! Sister if you are interested please DM the Instagram account or email triplea.talks25@gmail.com
Never 50/50, Just set things for each other like The man Pays the rent , bills and the women Can Pay for groceries etc.. once you go 50/50 it causes problems
@@rezwanh1200 great point!
if you can't pay everything, don't bother with these western women,
The issue is there’s some men that are entitled and WANT MORE
Quran and Sunnah are the right way to have a successful marriage. None of us has more wisdom than Allah.
@@sunnialiber4868 👊🏽
I don’t believe in 50:50 but I do believe in both contribute whatever is takes to cover shared costs wether that’s 50% 70% 90%
@@SimplyLivingffs thank you for that feedback 😊
Good discussion - I would also love to see a bit more education on the Islamic side of every discussion :)
@@DOMIN8RRR thank you for the feedback! Regarding your request, we don't feel qualified to preach on that level. But in future we do want to get a student of knowledge as a guest and get him to discuss with us some of these points.
@@Triple-ATalks that would be really good - understand what you mean. Keep the uploads consistent on genuine talking points and you guys will do very well :)
Good one,
100-0 I agree
@@asophia5562 👊🏽
Respectfully you man, especially the Somali brother, are a bit delusional. £35k in London is what £2.5k a month after tax, student loans, etc? Rent + house bills are at least £1.5-£2k a month then add food, transportation, internet/phone, etc. You're left with £50-£100 if lucky. Then he says to leave London, as if it is that easy to get up and relocate hundreds of miles from your family. + You need a deposit (£2k min) for a house and a job in the new town. And you haven't even mentioned that wages are lower outside London so you'll be in the same situation out there. Alhamdulillah, I've got a remote job but most the people around me don't and cannot just up and leave like the brother says. Last thing akh, to say people are not ambitious because they don't have a salary over £35k is a bit mad when average (google what average means) is £44k in London. That number is skewed only because there's soo many high earners here. So many people are working hard driving your buses, Ubers, and working in restaurants earn £30k or less but you saying they lack ambition is wild to me.
JazakAllahu khairan for sharing your opinion. You’ve made some good points, and it’s always good to encourage healthy debates so we can find solutions as a Muslim community. Some people have things figured out, and others are still working on it-and that’s okay. Let’s keep the constructive criticism coming and build each other up.
Fr, surprised by the lack of understanding on the relocation part. Would expect this from young lads in their early 20s. It's hard to make serious money nowadays. Maybe they're surrounded by money men, they kind of just live in a bubble.
@@Triple-ATalks Apologies akh if it came across as a rude comment but I just had to be honest. It came across as though you guys were being condescending to the older generations like our fathers who struggled hard to allow us to have an education, paying for tuition to put ourselves in positions to get good jobs, to build wealth by not making us pay rent etc allowing us to be in this privileged position. Some of the older generation worked 2/3 jobs to put food on the table. Even people nowadays are working 2/3 jobs, studying at night-time and they still can't get a high paying job / or fail at creating a business. Ofc there are those who are chilling at home but I'm not talking about them. Insha'Allah everything goes well with you man's podcast.
@@sm9990 no problem bro thanks for the comment and yes you make valid points
Tbh there’s loads of brothers earning under 2k a months 35k a year is abit high
@@HESLOCAL is that enough to take care of an entire household living in the UK?
LOLLLL £35k is high?? Are you okay? You have to live way below your means to live on that income in London even as a single person. Rent alone is £1200 in London without bills? What you left with? If you’re a male and that’s the mentality then I wonder if your spending purposely is very very low or you live with parents and once you get married with that income, life is gonna hit you hard boy. I doubt you’re married OR live in London.
@ your making assumptions left right and centre relax did you hear me say anything about me earning under 35k?
@ and just to let you know brother I’m
Married Moroccan man with 4 kids mashallah
So more reasons some sisters should contribute right or should these brothers stay single?
Guys if you want to see more of the gang and some personal stories then check out the latest episode 👇🏾
ua-cam.com/video/okJIXTvmUYI/v-deo.htmlsi=MoPr0j8Z3mnnwGoG
70/30
Some constructive feedback. It's not a bad podcast but the black brother needs to wait until the other finish talks before he talks. The mic's are loud and it was annoying hearing all of you speak at the same time so often.
@@riz8966 his name is Yahya and some will say he isn't black 🤪
@@Triple-ATalksif you dont talk over each other it will look like a drs appointment, keep it as it is its authentic
@@sajidkhan3355 😂👌
@@Triple-ATalksSomali before Black
70/30
its peak woman will love you conditionally only jarring they only love us for what we can provide
@@humbleDon96 a lot of men feel this way unfortunately
It goes both ways, a lot of Muslim men want women who don’t care about money and are willing to provide. Those same men would never change a diaper or make a sandwich. I’ve seen that so many times, women will do 50/50 with their husbands and still be the sole home maker. It’s sad how some Muslim men think this way
@@servantofAllah108 this is a great point
No one truly loves unconditionally. Men definitely don't lol. Even some mother's don't..there's always a condition there whether you know it or not.
My comment got deleted
What did you comment? ✍️
70/30😂
😂😂 70/30
I agree with Muaz 👀
@@zakstar Muaz will be happy to hear that 😂
Is the Somali brother single?😎
Such double standards
@@SK-xo4br which parts? Constructive feedback please 😅
70/30 looool
Too much laughter on serious issues
@@Caddy55 what do you recommend?
InshaAllah I'll be more serious next time
I just came across your channel . The topic is very valid for today’s time . People are going through difficulties. A little laughter is fine but more focus should be b given how to navigate these problems
Continue doing the good work you are doing. Allah bless you all . 👍
Them two being interviewed loved their views. They bangali guy is absolutely talking trash. Is not educated at all on emotional awareness and womens needs. I hardly ever comment on vids ...but as i was watching this my blood was boiling. Please get rid of the bangali guy he is missleading others . 😅. !!!
@@RS-vz2my can you point out exactly what triggered you from the Bengali guy?
I just replied back and it said email not found 😅
@@RS-vz2my you emailed the Triple-A Talks email?
@Triple-ATalks basically - him saying a course on marriage is baseless . Using the look around you at relatives marriages etc shohld be enough to learn etc.
5050 scenario - didnt like his justification.
They will probz be more didnt finish watching it bcz he just put me off. As someone who deals with women going thru divorce and helping them navigate their thoughts , it just useless and pointless having someone like that talk about women marriages and expectations. Hes undoing other peoples hard work in trying help youngsters and the older generation on the meaning of marriage. Marriage is a life long commitment to bettering urself helping ur spouse and brining up good kids to help make the world better. He needs to use islam as his navigating tool not his cultural nonsense. His justifications are not educational pointers what i mean to say is he needs to learn how to portray his opinion and not talk like hes from the streets back home. 😊
Sorry not sorry.
@@RS-vz2my thank you for sharing that feedback. It was a little more constructive than the original comment. Debate and discussing different opinions must be conducted in a healthy way. Maybe Sayf will expand his views in the Part 2.